Over the last couple of months, I’ve had the opportunity to speak on communication confidence at a handful of leadership events. One of the things that has been really eye-opening for attendees is learning about the connection between their internal communication and external communication. So, I thought this would be a helpful (and fun!) topic to dig into on the pod.

Let’s start with defining each of these terms. Internal communication is how you communicate with yourself. This includes the words and phrases you use and the tone of voice you use. When you're in a tough moment, do you speak to yourself with kindness, compassion, and respect? Or, do you have a tendency to beat yourself up and talk to yourself in a way you would never talk to someone else who is struggling? When you are on the cusp of making a big decision or going for something new and big, do you champion yourself by reminding yourself of your strengths, talents, and qualifications? Or, do you tell yourself you’re probably not qualified, and you probably won’t get what you want out of the situation?

External communication is how you communicate with others. When you are entering a high-stakes situation, do you show up with confidence and grace? Do you speak up, share ideas, and stand up for the people and issues that matter most to you in a way that calls people to take action and/or work beside you? Or, do you sit back, stay quiet, or run away the moment you sense anything uncomfortable, unpredictable, or challenging? Or, maybe you get defensive and aggressive when things don’t go your way - perhaps taking on a my-way-or-the-highway attitude?

As you may suspect, our internal communication greatly impacts our external communication. If you don’t have your internal communication dialed in, your external communication will probably be pretty poor, even harmful in high-stakes moments. Our internal communication patterns and habits are likely defaults that have been with us for years if not decades. In this episode, I talk through 5 ways to begin to shift your internal communication defaults in order to positively impact your external communication habits.

Bottom line… Your internal communication must be rock solid if you want your external communication to get you closer to your goals and dreams!

Resources:

Join Aligned, my leadership incubator for values-driven women leaders: saradean.com/aligned
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