Podcast Summary: "How to Stop Comparing Yourself with Elyse Fox of Sad Girls Club"

Podcast Information:

• Title: She's So Lucky
• Host/Author: She's So Lucky
• Episode: How to Stop Comparing Yourself with Elyse Fox of Sad Girls Club
• Release Date: July 1, 2025
• Description: She’s So Lucky is a chart-topping weekly podcast dedicated to women who create their own luck against all odds. Host Les Alfred engages in compelling conversations with successful women from various fields, inspiring listeners to live life on their own terms.

Introduction

In this episode, host Les Alfred welcomes Elyse Fox, a Brooklyn-based filmmaker, writer, and founder of the nonprofit Sad Girls Club. The conversation centers around overcoming the trap of comparison, tending to mental health, and building supportive communities.

Notable Quotes:

• Alex (Host): “This is one of those episodes where you are going to feel seen, heard, and it's basically like a hug in conversation form.” ([00:01])

Overcoming Comparison and Embracing Personal Journeys

Elyse shares a pivotal moment when she decided to leave her comfort zone to pursue her own path, highlighting the importance of taking risks to create one's own luck.

Key Points:

• Decision to Change: Elyse felt compelled to leave a stable job because she was "tired of being sad" and not enjoying her life. ([02:26])
• First Step: She began by writing down her ideas despite not being fond of writing, which led to the creation of her first company, Produced by Girls. ([02:50])

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “...leaving my comfort zone and stepping out of the box and doing it on my own has been like the best thing I've ever done.” ([01:48])
• Elyse Fox: “...I don't want to wake up 20 years from now saying I coulda, woulda, shoulda. So I did.” ([02:26])

Building Sad Girls Club: Origin and Impact

The conversation delves into the inception of Sad Girls Club, Elyse’s nonprofit dedicated to mental wellness, and how it evolved from her personal struggles with depression.

Key Points:

• Creating a Safe Space: Elyse used film as a medium to express her depression, leading to the creation of a short film, Conversations with Friends, which resonated globally. ([03:35])
• Community Response: The film received heartfelt messages from women worldwide, inspiring Elyse to expand her efforts beyond filmmaking. ([04:10])
• Establishing Sad Girls Club: Starting with an Instagram page, Elyse facilitated in-person events fostering open conversations about mental health. ([04:50])

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “There’s no face of depression. You can’t tell.” ([03:35])
• Elyse Fox: “...this is like my first, like, real baby.” ([05:48])

Navigating Support and Vulnerability

Elyse discusses the challenges of seeking help and accepting support, emphasizing the importance of community and mentorship in personal and professional growth.

Key Points:

• Seeking Help Without Therapy: Unable to afford therapy initially, Elyse found support through Sad Girls Club events and a network of supportive women. ([06:35])
• Overcoming Ego: As a Capricorn, Elyse struggled with accepting help but learned to prioritize healing and community support over independence. ([07:00])
• Mentorship and Collaboration: Building a support system through mentorship and collaborative efforts was crucial for sustaining her nonprofit. ([07:45])

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “Once you speak about it and put that energy out there, people will receive or they want to help you.” ([08:05])
• Elyse Fox: “Why do we do that?” ([09:15])

Reclaiming Success: Internal vs. External Metrics

The discussion shifts to redefining success by focusing on personal fulfillment rather than societal standards, encouraging listeners to set internal markers for achievement.

Key Points:

• Redefining Success: Elyse emphasizes trying new things and setting personal goals that align with her well-being rather than external expectations. ([17:28])
• Internal Markers: Success is measured by personal happiness and meaningful moments, such as spending quality time with her son or having a great day without overexertion. ([18:46])
• Avoiding Comparison: Strategies to eliminate feelings of comparison include muting certain social media accounts and establishing specific usage rules to protect mental health. ([19:23])

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “Success for me is just doing what my heart feels I need to do for the betterment of Elise and not what anyone else has chiseled into my mind as what success means.” ([17:38])
• Elyse Fox: “I try to set barriers with social media.” ([19:23])

Managing Social Media and Mental Health

Elyse shares practical methods to combat social media-induced comparison, such as setting strict usage boundaries and focusing on activities that bring joy and presence.

Key Points:

• Social Media Boundaries: Elyse sets specific times for social media use and actively mutes accounts that trigger comparison fatigue. ([19:23])
• Filling Time with Joy: Engaging in activities like TikTok binges, walking, or going to the gym helps Elyse stay present and reduce negative thoughts. ([19:23])
• Co-Host’s Strategy: Co-host John echoes Elyse’s approach by deleting Instagram on weekends, enhancing presence and reducing habitual checking. ([20:33])

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “Just being in a space to receive... you might receive like feedback or criticism, but it's all for the better good.” ([09:34])
• John (Co-Host): “I started deleting Instagram from my phone on the weekends.” ([20:33])

Entrepreneurial Journey and Leadership Lessons

Elyse reflects on her eight-year journey with Sad Girls Club, highlighting the lessons learned about leadership, team collaboration, and personal growth.

Key Points:

• Leadership Style: Elyse aims to empower her team by encouraging collaboration and valuing each member’s contributions, fostering a supportive and inclusive environment. ([35:53])
• Adaptability: Shifting from a large team vision to a small, efficient remote team taught Elyse the importance of flexibility and hands-on involvement. ([35:53])
• Personal Growth: Running Sad Girls Club has taught Elyse to relieve self-imposed pressure, leading to personal improvements in her relationships and parenting. ([40:50])

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “I do not know everything. I want everything to be collaborative conversation.” ([39:18])
• Elyse Fox: “Leading Sad Girls Club has taught me that I put too much pressure on myself.” ([40:50])

Conclusion: Embracing the Journey Over the Destination

Elyse and the hosts discuss the concept that success is an ongoing journey without a definitive endpoint, emphasizing continuous growth and self-discovery.

Key Points:

• No Final Destination: Success is not a static achievement but a continuous process of growth and learning. ([42:26])
• Enjoying the Journey: Embracing each step and finding fulfillment in daily experiences is integral to genuine success. ([43:04])
• Celebrating Milestones: Elyse's new podcast, The End of an Era, is an example of celebrating endings as positive transitions rather than solely mourning them. ([44:43])

Notable Quotes:

• John (Co-Host): “We think a certain level will bring us fulfillment. And making it is like finding fulfillment.” ([43:59])
• Elyse Fox: “You always have to like work to stay there and then work past that to grow.” ([42:10])

Final Thoughts and Resources

Elyse promotes Sad Girls Club and her new podcast, encouraging listeners to engage with the community and explore The End of an Era for deeper insights into personal transitions.

Notable Quotes:

• Elyse Fox: “You can follow Sad Girls Club at Sad Girls Club on all platforms and then Elise Fox on all platforms as well.” ([48:12])

Resources & Links:

• Sad Girls Club: sagrosclub.org
• Elise Fox on Social Platforms: Available across major platforms (specific handles not provided)
• The End of an Era Podcast: Available on major podcast platforms

Conclusion: This episode provides a heartfelt exploration of Elyse Fox’s journey in overcoming comparison, building a supportive community through Sad Girls Club, and redefining success on her own terms. Listeners are encouraged to embrace their unique paths, seek support, and celebrate their personal milestones as integral parts of their ongoing journey.