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The following podcast is a Dear Media production.
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I don't like to gamble, but if there's one thing I'm willing to bet on, it's myself. Wise words from our queen bee, Beyonce. That man is over there gambling away your family's assets, losing on sports betting, yet you're too afraid to bet on yourself. Make it make sense. Welcome back to she's so Lucky. My name is Les. I am your host, and I am kicking off a new month with a new series. And today's solo episode is actually inspired by the show's rebrand. You might be thinking, les, that was a while ago. I know it was, because here's the thing. The way March came and went and the way April came and went, and it took me a while to realize, oh my gosh, it's been a year since we've rebranded this show and I was so busy with the Business of youf series and with the Lucky Girls Invest series and figuring out how to recover my immune system that I left somewhere back in 2025 that I was so distracted that the anniversary came and went and I forgot to celebrate it and talk about it. I talked about it a little bit on social media, but I didn't really talk about it as much here on the podcast. And as I was reflecting on the past year and on the transition from balanced Black Girl to She's so Lucky, it got me really thinking about how far the show has come. And it also made me want to really re anchor the message of the show. And that is what inspired this month's series for the month of May, which is betting on yourselves. So today I'm going to be talking about betting on yourself, how to bet on yourself, the importance of betting on yourself. And then all month long, we're going to have some amazing interviews from incredible women, including some of your faves who are masters at betting on themselves and have incredible gems to share for you, too. So you might be thinking, what does betting on myself have to do with she's so Lucky? It actually kind of has everything to do with she's so Lucky. As we were developing the brand, I, I was working with my brand designer, Lola. I talk about Lola on the show a lot because we worked together really closely throughout the year. She had worked on the branding for Balance Black Girl multiple times over the years and also developed the branding for she's so Lucky. And she and I just worked together really closely. And as we were building out the brand identity for she's so Lucky, we really wanted to differentiate it from Balance Black Girl. So Balance Black Girl existed for about six years, and in that time, it had a lot of different identities. But what we ended up zoning in on was this very youthful, light, airy Persona. And that's why we had lots of blues and very fun colors. And it was very bright and it was very airy. If you remember the old artwork or the final artwork before I rebranded, it had Balance Black Girl and those blue letters, and it was like this really bright background, and it was me standing there in that denim suit. And the reason why we did that was because we really wanted to differentiate Balance Black Girl from other platforms that were very similar at the time. Because at the time, what was really popular amongst similar platforms were either this really earthy, like, grounding, lots of earth tones and browns and deep greens, or it was like hot pink sparkle. And so we really want to Balance Black Girl to stand out. So instead of doing hot pink sparkle, because that's just not really me at all. No offense to the pink and to the pink girls. It's just not really my thing. Instead of focusing on that, like, grounding, earthy vibe, we were like, what if we made it really light and airy and youthful and playful? And so that was really the Persona of Balanced Black Girl for a lot of its existence, which was really great also because I started Balance Black Girl when I was in my 20s. That really matched the coming of age vibe that I had at the time. So as we were going back to the drawing board to figure out what we wanted. She's so lucky. To be something that was really important for me was that it was just a bit more grown. I didn't necessarily want it to be as light and as youthful and as playful and as demure. Not to say that we can't still have playful elements, because I do think a lot of our, like, Lucky Girl language and stuff has that playful element. But we also wanted it to be a little bit more grown, so the colors are a little bit darker. On the COVID art, I'm wearing a darker blazer. The background is a little bit darker. It's a little bit moodier. And as we were putting together the visuals and the mood boards, there were a lot of different things that signified luck, but in a very grown woman way. And then it was also just aesthetics of things that I liked. I love the way martinis look. Even though anybody who knows me knows I'm not a big drinker. You're not going to see me drink a martini ever. But I'm obsessed with how they look so like a classic martini with the olive was the inspiration for the color palette. And then on the mood board, we had a lot of other things that signified luck, but in a very, like, grown woman way. It was very much like a casino royale. Stepping up to the poker table, you know, what you got going. It was like cards, and it was this idea of a clover, and it was dice, and it was spades, and it was like betting on yourself. And that was what really inspired she's so Lucky and the identity of it. So while I knew that and while Lola knew that, and while if you go to our website, she's the luckypodcast.com, which more of you should be going to, because our website actually has a lot of really great information on there. And I spent a lot, lot of time creating blog posts for each episode, as well as updating it regularly with all of our discount codes. You'll see that identity there. But I realized that as I'm sitting here talking on the podcast, I'm not necessarily using language that really reinforces that. And so a year into this new identity, I thought it would be great to revisit that and to talk about what creating our own luck looks like from that lens. And I started thinking about the importance of really betting on ourselves, because ultimately, as we were designing the brand, that's what we were really talking about. We talk about creating our own luck, we talk about winning. We talk about being that really successful version of ourselves. It's like somebody who knows how to play the hand that they're dealt and who is playing to win. And that is really the theme that we are walking through this month with and really just moving forward with. Like, that is the ethos and the attitude and the energy of she's so lucky. And it took a little bit of time to settle into that, just like anything new that you're doing. But now that we're a year into it, I feel super, super confident about that message. So when we talk about what betting on yourself means, there are a few different pillars that I want us to really think about. The first thing is playing the hand that you're dealt and playing to win. And that seed was really planted for me. Actually, earlier this year, in the second episode that we did with Tricia Lee, we did a little bonus rapid fire segment that only lived on social media. It actually wasn't in the episode, but in that bonus rapid fire, Trisha dropped an absolute bar. She said, you can become consumed with the hand that you're Dealt. But, girl, if you're at the table, you better play, and you better play to win. And when I literally was sitting next to that woman, hearing her say that, it was like something unlocked in my brain. It was like I had been trying to input a combination or like a password to unlock something, and those words finally were like the correct password to unlock the fuller potential of my brain. And it's something that I actually go back and listen to and refer to and repeat to myself again and again when I'm playing and when I'm sick of my own bs, of like, girl, you're at the table. Stop whining over the hand that you were dealt. Play it, and play it to win. And I think for a lot of us, we can be so focused on the hand that we're dealt and what we do have and what we don't have and what we don't get and what other people have and what other people see and what other people don't see and what's fair and what's not. And there can be a lot of validity to that because all kinds of hands are dealt. And there are going to be people who are dealt a better hand than you, and there are also going to be people who are dealt a more difficult hand than you. But it doesn't mean that you, nor maybe somebody who has a more difficult hand than you, cannot play to win. It means that you got to get strategic and you got to focus on doing the best you can with what's ahead of you and the more energy that you put into what someone else has or what was dealt and what's not and what's fair and what's this and what's that, that's energy that you could be putting towards playing to win. And when we focus so much on what our hands don't have and who's not there and who's not clapping and who's this and who's that and what's that? We' basically folding before we even have a shot in the game. But if you think about a deck of cards, you think about a hand that you were dealt, and you're folding before you even put something down. You don't know what could be on the other side of that play. You have to put something down. You have to play. You have to look at the cues around you and figure out how to get from A to B to C to D. And oftentimes we get so busy looking to other people to give us the answer for how to play or. But Your hand is yours. Like I can't necessarily tell you how to play or what to play because I'm not in your head. I'm not the one holding your hand. You are the one who is there. You are the one who knows what that next step is that you want to get to. And you have to be really focused on the game in front of you. This has been really resonating for me because I feel like the first quarter of the year was really, really challenging. I was just in such a weird state space with my business because I'm experiencing a lot of transition right now. And I'm realizing that a version of the business that I built is not necessarily the business that I truly want. And that has been a really scary realization. And I was in a space of feeling so much kind of self pity because I felt like people weren't understanding me. And though I do still feel like people don't understand me, it's not from a place of like, woe is me. People don't get it. People aren't seeing me now. I'm in more of a space of okay, yes, people are not understanding because I was playing the wrong hand. I have been playing this like influencer game for so many years. Even though I know in my soul that's not really what I want, that's not really my aspiration. I'm not getting the types of opportunities that I wanted because I wasn't putting myself in the right position for those opportunities. When we think about something like luck, so much of it is being in the right place at the right time. But that doesn't necessarily happen by happenstance. That often happens by putting yourself in the right place, hopefully at the right time. Now placement is more in your control. Timing, not necessarily. But if you stay ready so you don't have to get ready, then the odds are more so in your favor. And so I realized that I was not in a position to receive a lot of the things that I'd wanted because I was putting myself in the wrong thing. Right? I'm putting myself on a football field knowing I want to win a basketball game. Make it make sense. It's. It's playing the wrong hand. And so as I had time in between all of my sicknesses over the winter, because I did not breathe out of my nose between January and March of this year, I swear I had a lot of downtime. The New York winter was really rough. I didn't really leave the house. I had a lot of time to just reflect and figure out what I wanted and where I wanted to go. But I realized, okay, I actually think I need to play a different hand because I want to win a different game. Because when we are playing the right game, when we're playing the right hand, that means that we are betting on ourselves from a position of power. When you're making the wrong plays, you're kind of betting on yourself to lose. And even if you're not losing in the literal sense of like losing a game, if you're winning something that isn't resonating with you, that's not really any different than losing. But what gets hard is we want other people to see the light in us before we see it in ourselves. And I have learned that it just does not work that way, especially in the business that I'm in, of being on the Internet, where everything is. Is about clout and perception and how important people think you are based on certain factors. Like, we want everybody to see the magic in us, but a lot of people are followers and bandwagoners. In the episode that I did with Shan Boudrum last year, she explained this really beautifully, where she was saying that on social media, a lot of posts will get better engagement if we see that other people are engaging with something, and there could be something that can be an incredible piece of content, but if it doesn't have a lot of likes, then people are just going to scroll right past it, versus if it already has a little traction, a little motion, then that makes people stop and watch because then their interest is piqued and they want to see what the fuss is about. That can apply to so many different things. Oftentimes, people only see your motion once you got some motion. So the first step to making that happen is making sure that you see your motion. This was also explained really beautifully by Viola Davis in a recent interview that she did on Amy Poehler's podcast, which Viola, by the way, if you're listening, love you, girl. Come on. She's so lucky. We would have a great chat, but in that conversation, Viola and Amy were talking about Viola's kind of entrance into acting and how she became interested in acting as a child doing theater and things like that. And Amy said, you know, did somebody point at you and go, wow, look at her. She's so talented. And Viola said, I don't know if anyone else pointed at me and said, wow, but I pointed at me and said, wow. And I feel like that is the perfect way to sum this up, to sum up the importance of betting on yourself. You can't wait for other people to look at you and say wow. Because people are sheep. They are followers. They're only going to do that when they see other people doing it. And nobody is going to do it until you do it for yourself. Nobody is going to bet on you more than you bet on yourself. So you got a point at you. You got to say, wow. You got to look at the hand that you're dealt and you got to make your next play as if it's going to be your best play. And then each play after that will get better and better.
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That's playing the hand that you're dealt. That was kind of the element of the she's so lucky mood board that was related to cards. Now I want to talk a little bit about dice, because also on our Pinterest board that I sent to Lola as we were building out this brand, I had also had a lot of imagery of dice, because on Pinterest there's actually a lot of really gorgeous, like, chic aesthetic photos of dice. And I loved this idea of just like working the odds and taking a roll and continuing to roll to increase our surface area for luck. And when I think about what that looks like in practice, it's really about taking risks. There is not a single lucky or successful. You know, we use those two words kind of interchangeably on this show. Uber successful. Amazing woman who you look up to, who has not taken some sort of risk, who has not put herself out there to do something that people didn't understand, to maybe jump before she was fully ready to try something that may have been unheard of to do something that the people in her life maybe didn't understand. Like every single person who you look up to in some way has taken some sort of risk, has been willing to roll the dice. And the more you roll, the more likely you are to land in a position that you want to be in. But when I say taking risks, I don't mean being reckless. I'm very for being pragmatic and for being smart. But it's all about getting yourself ready, being in that position to win, to roll, to get that thing that you are looking for. It's really about the preparation so that when it's time to jump, you're able to jump. So when you think about the things that you want, that luckiest version of you who has that thing that you're working towards, or that future state desire of life that you really want to have, what is she really good at? If that opportunity that she was looking for came knocking on her door right now, what would she need to have in place to be able to rock it? Because there's nothing worse than getting a great opportunity and not being fully prepared for it. So part of that rolling the dice before you land on those numbers that you want is the preparation. It is placing those smaller bets so that when it's time for that big bet, you're able to get that return. So how are you able to prepare to be the version of yourself that you want to be? How are you preparing for that opportunity to come in that you really want to have, so that when it comes to you, you are able to knock it out of the park? We just cannot wait for other people to understand us. We cannot wait for other people to fully get the vision before we leap, before we roll, before we place the bet, before we do the thing. If something has been placed on your heart to do, if there is a vision that you have that you are supposed to carry out, other people probably aren't going to get it until you do it. So other people's small minds of not understanding the moves that you're making, not understanding the risk that you're taking, it doesn't mean don't ever listen to anybody who maybe has concern for you. But it means that your vision is not always for other people to understand. Earlier this year, when I was having kind of a hard time, it was because I was just getting so much unsolicited feedback from people who didn't understand my vision. And that's not to say that some of the constructive feedback wasn't helpful or beneficial because some of it was. But what was most helpful and beneficial was the feedback from people who understood what I was saying and people who understood where I was going. The feedback from people who are comfortable with you staying in a box that you know you don't want to be in is never going to make sense. And it's never going to make sense for you to hold yourself back by taking that so so seriously unless you want to stay in that particular box. But if you were taking the opinions of people who are comfortable with you staying in a box and you're seeing that as a reason to not take the risk that you want to make or to make the bets on yourself that you want to make, then you need to go back to the drawing board. You need to get reconnected with self, and you need to get reconnected with that vision that you have so that you can be really clear on taking the next best step to actually get to where you want to go. So I've talked on the show a lot about how I'm not super interested in my wellness influencer roots. And it's not because I don't care about wellness or that I don't want other people to be well. It's because I feel like that chapter of my life is complete. Like, how many times at this point can I tell y' all to journal? How many? Me posting clips of my workout every morning isn't going to make you stronger. It's not going to make anybody better. And at this point, I mean, I started doing that in, like, 2014, 2015. If now, 11 or 12 years later, me doing that hasn't inspired someone to get up and move in a different way. Like, I've run out of ideas, I've run out of things to say about that. And so much of my own personal growth and expansion is beginning to talk about different things and do different things. And so for people who solely want to see that wellness big sister box and solely want to see me in that box, they're just going to have to not really get it or revisit those things that I'd done before. Because that box is full, it's complete, it's closed. There's nothing else that can be put in it. But when you allow yourself to be limited by people who just don't fully understand your vision or where you're going next, it's going to prevent you from rolling. And that very next role or that very next risk that you may take might be those, you know, two Sets of six or whatever it is that you're trying to roll. So you have to be super clear on what is worth it and what is meaningful and fruitful for you. Because at the end of the day, you are the only one who has to do the thing, who has to carry out the thing. Earlier in my career when I was in corporate roles, I could not stand and I stayed in them because of what other people, because of what my peers from college thought, or because of what my parents thought, or because of what my aunts and uncles thought. At the end of the day, none of them were in the car with me when I was commuting two hours to and from work each day, being miserable. None of them were with me in the conference room when I was the youngest person there by 20 years and the only black person there. And people were talking to me absolutely crazy. None of them were there when I had to be at my desk at 6:30 in the morning after sitting in that two hours of traffic. So I finally had to say, actually, this doesn't feel good to me and I am the one who is living in this and having this experience. And I can't let the opinions of people who are not in the game with me dictate my next move. And the same goes for you. And again, yes, I learned that lesson back in corporate. Clearly, I'm still learning it because I just had this kind of moment of clarity where I connected that to how I was feeling a few months ago. So sometimes with these lessons, we learn them over and over in different facets and seasons of our lives. But if somebody is not actually in the game with you, they shouldn't necessarily dictate the roles that you take of that dice and the risks that you make when you're the one who is dealing with the consequences both positive or potentially negative. And I also think that a fear of things not working out, I don't even want to say negative consequences because yes, it's good to mitigate risk. It's good to take calculated and informed risks and like I was saying earlier, to be prepared for the risks that we take. I'm not telling you to just be reckless. But part of it and being willing to take these risks isn't knowing that everything's going to work out perfectly. It's trusting yourself enough to know that even if something doesn't work out, you're going to be Gucci either way, you're going to figure it out, you're going to bounce back, you're going to pivot onto that next thing, you're going to take that lesson and you're going to apply it to the next roll of the dice and hopefully get to somewhere better. And when you get to that point of self trust, then you become so much less fearful of change and a risk and a pivot and of trying something new. So even if you have fear that you're moving through, fear is not a sign that the bet that you're making on yourself is wrong. Fear is a sign that you care. And fear is a sign that maybe that bet matters. Which could be all the more reason to make it now. Address the things that are bringing you fear. Mitigate them the best that you can. But don't use that as an excuse excuse to not bet on yourself at all. 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Starting something new isn't just hard, it can honestly be a little scary. I remember when I started my podcast and my business. I had so many what if thoughts like what if no one listens? What if no one buys? What if I'm putting all of this time into something that doesn't actually work. But choosing to move forward anyway ended up being one of the best decisions I've made. And I'll say this, it helps when you have the right tools backing you up. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from brands just getting started to ones you already know and love. If you're building something, Shopify makes it so much easier to actually bring your vision to life. You can create a beautiful online store with hundreds of ready to use templates that match your brand.
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And what I really like is how
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efficient it makes everything. Shopify has built in AI tools that help you write product descriptions, page headlines, and even improve your product photos which saves so much time. It also helps you get your business in front of the right people. You can create email and social media campaigns so your brand shows up wherever your audience already is. And everything lives in one place, from inventory to payments to analytics. So you're not juggling a bunch of different platforms trying to make it all work. It's time to turn those what ifs into with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.com Lucky go to shopify.com Lucky that's shopify.com Lucky
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this episode
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is sponsored by Cotton. So the weather is finally warming up. And you know how this time of year when things are warming up, you just want everything to feel a little bit lighter. Your routine, your schedule, even what you're wearing. So for me, that's when I start reaching for cotton based pieces because it just makes sense. Cotton is breathable, it's comfortable, and it actually works with your body, especially as the temperature starts to shift. So whether I'm out for the day, I'm traveling, or I'm just trying to feel put together without overthinking it, cotton pieces are always in rotation. And some of my go to pieces this time of year are some of my 100% cotton dresses that I can throw on anytime. I can dress them up, I can dress them down. They're super comfortable, but I know I'll also feel cool while I'm wearing them. I've gotten really intentional about checking the tags for fabric composition when I shop, because not all fabrics are created equal. And when something is made with cotton, you can really feel the difference. It's softer, it holds up over time, and it's something you can wear again and again without it losing its shape. It's also a natural fiber, which is really important for me, especially for the things that I'm wearing every day and even what I'm sleeping in. Cotton just feels better on your skin, and it's one of those small upgrades that actually makes a big difference in how you feel. And the best part is that you don't have to sacrifice style for comfort. Cotton is one of those fabrics that moves with you day to night, warm afternoons to cooler evenings. And I love how easy it is to care for. Cotton is the fabric of our lives. So next time you're shopping, check the tag and choose cotton. Learn more at thefabricofourlives.com and follow along at Discover Cotton using Shopcotton.
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Next, I want to talk about probably the element of she's so lucky that y' all are the most familiar with, which is this idea of the clover. I've been calling you all the clovers for a little while now, and that Symbol of the clover has a lot of significance and meaning for this show. Obviously, four leaf clovers are a symbol of good luck and are very cutesy. You know, the clover is a sign in a deck of cards, kind of similar to that, that vibe that we were talking about earlier. We also had Gabrielle Union on the show last year, which was a really big turning point for the show. That episode went live, like right before the rebrand. For those of us who are of the millennial breed, we famously know one of her roles as being Isis, the cheer captain from Bring It On. She was the captain of the team, the Clovers. And so all of those little elements are part of what make our community here as like the Clover gang really fun and interesting. And it's like, of course, like the Clovers, they were the best cheerleading team. They were super fly. Everybody was ripping them off and wanted to be like them. It just, it fits. It fits very well. But I do want to make a little bit of a distinction and I want to talk about the difference between a three leaf clover and a four leaf clover, because actually the four leaf clovers are the ones that are truly lucky. And I want to talk about the transition from being like the three leaf version of yourself to being the four leaf version of yourself. Because if you may notice, whenever I and or the she's so Lucky brand is using a clover emoji, it's always the four leaf clover, because that's luckier. And we really want to embody that four leaf version of themselves. Because this idea of a four leaf clover, it's a little bit more rare. It's like a variant that is supposed to be seen as good luck. But around here, we very much believe in creating our own luck. So while in nature you can't necessarily create a four leaf clover, I think that we can create that four leaf clover version of ourselves. And the way that we really step into that is by betting on ourselves and kind of getting that proof of concept. The more that we bet on ourselves and the more that we start winning some of these bets, the more confident we feel in how we move forward. And I think what makes that four leaf clover and that four leaf version of ourselves so special is really leaning into that unique essence. It is placing bets on ourselves and winning bets that are uniquely ours. When I think about the three leaf version of ourselves, it is fitting into boxes. It is chasing trends, it is chasing approval. It's doing something for the sole reason that we see other people doing it and getting success with it. But when I think about that four leaf version of ourselves. It's because we're in such alignment with our unique essence, with our gifts, with our vision for ourselves. We are creating something new. We are embodying this energy that only we can have. Because, again, being that four leaf version of ourselves is all about being unique. It's all about leaning into your unique talents and your unique gifts. And the thing is, like, that's not always a romantic process. That is actually so hard. Like, it is so hard to create something from scratch. It is so hard to not succumb to the trends that you see around you and to hop on the bandwagons that you see around you. It is incredibly hard. Okay? But when you win from not doing that stuff, there's just a level of satisfaction and of pride and of strength and of goodness that comes from that. I know for me, how I feel that in my work, especially having my work be so related to content, is. It's like when I have a piece of content that really lands with people, that feels so uniquely me. Maybe it was a moment from the podcast that was really illuminating, or maybe it's like a thought that I had that is really genuine and just super authentic to who I am. When people engage with that, like, that feels so good because I'm like, wow, this is a unique thought. This is something that people can't get anywhere else. This is so authentic. This is so at either my core or the core essence of she's so lucky. And people are rocking with it. And that is so great. That feels so different than just like, hopping on a trending topic or hopping on a trending sound and having an algorithm pick it up because it's, like, inflammatory or because it's what everybody else is talking about, even if I don't have anything unique to say about it. Getting engagement from those things, it doesn't even, like, feel good because it's just like, okay, yeah, whatever, this was cheap. Maybe a little salacious, Maybe a little, like, meh. Like, people don't see me. People aren't hearing me because this isn't me. That's really coming through and embodying this. It's very three leaf version. It's not that four leaf. This is something that is a unique thought from the heart. Not hopping on trends, not exploiting people's feelings. It's just, like, all about empowerment and what feels good in this moment. Those two things can confirm, feel entirely, entirely different. And as I've kind of moved through this transition with my work, I'm so much more interested in the former than the latter. And even if it means that something gets less engagement, that engagement actually feels better if it's so much more genuine than if it's like something that I even want to talk about to begin with. A lot of people see it and a lot of people share it. And I've had a lot of those moments. And then I usually end up taking that content down because it just feels so icky, you know, when a fake version of yourself is like who people want to hang out with and you're like, oh well this, that's not that great. You would so much rather have people who truly see you and see the unique version of you rock with you than have a bunch of people rock with a fake version of you. And I think that is why for some people, they reach a certain point of success or they get things that they thought they wanted and they still feel unsatisfied. It's because they were an inauthentic version of themselves to get there. It's because they were not being that unique, that special four leaf version of themselves that can fully embody whatever it is that they're receiving because they weren't a full embodied version of themselves to actually be get it. And so I know for me, as I'm moving into this next season of like my career and doing things a little bit differently and figuring different things out, I would so much rather resonate with fewer people who resonate with that four leaf version of me then hopping on a salacious trend so that more people resonate with the three leaf version of me. And it took me a really long time to get there. And I also think it's why some of like the unsolicited feedback that I was getting earlier this year felt so icky was because it felt so three leaf. It felt like people wanted me to double down on this three leaf version of myself that like I just knew I couldn't deliver. And I actually don't want to build on top of that because if I were to build a house on that three leaf foundation, it would feel shitty and rickety with hate it. I wouldn't want to be in it and I would so much rather continue to slowly, slowly build up four leaf version on top of the foundation because it's going to feel so much more solid and that is a house that I would truly want to be in. So as you think about placing bets on yourself, make sure that you are betting on the four leaf version of you. Make sure you are Betting on getting things that you actually want that not only feel good once you get them, but that feel good during the process. When you lean in with that energy, that's when you're not going to be resentful. That's when you're not going to want to like burn it all to the ground. That's when you're not going to be dissatisfied. You are going to feel so much more grateful and peaceful and aligned and what you attract and what you achieve. Because it's truly what is meant for you and is not some cheap version of what you want. It is who you actually are and what you really want. So stop trying to be like everybody else. Stop chasing trends. Stop pretending like following the same old formula that you see everyone else follow is going to get you what you want. Because you are unlike anybody else. And there might be a path that is so specific and unique to you that you will feel so much better following that version. So as you are thinking about finding that four leaf version of yourself, there are a couple of questions inspired by what we've talked about so far today. One, what is one way that as our girl Viola said, you can point to yourself and say wow. Two, instead of letting yourself be so consumed with what is directly in front of you, how can you start with your ideal end state in mind, the ending or like that milestone that you truly want to reach that aligns with a four leaf version of yourself? Start from there and work your way backwards. Because if you're finding that where you're at right now is actually not helping you work towards that four leaf version of yourself, which is how I've felt about influencing and some of the other things that have been happening on social media. We gotta reverse it. We gotta go back to the drawing board and figure out how to reverse engineer from that end state as the four leaf version of ourselves who actually has what it is we really want. And three, so much about embodying the four leaf version of yourself is about popping your shit. It's about knowing where you are the one. Like you're one of them ones. What are you super good at? What makes you feel super special? In what light are you like, yeah, I know I got this. Yeah, I know I'm her in. In what area, in what arena and how can you continue to lean into that more and more and more? What is your special sauce like? Your secret sauce is the key to unlocking that four leaf version of yourself. Okay, so at this point we have the cards that we're dealt. We Know what's in our hand. We know it's worth playing. We know what makes us rare. Next, we have the hardest part, which is staying in the game. Because placing the bet can be the easy part. But the aftermath of the bet, if it doesn't necessarily work out how we think it should the first time around can be really hard. Staying at the table, staying in the game is really, really hard. But here's the thing. Lucky girls don't fold. Lucky girls don't fold. Lucky girls have another hand that they're ready to play. Even if they get knocked down, they get back up and they have another hand that they're ready to play. The one. You can't confuse a bad round with a bad bet. Even if you bet on yourself and things don't work out exactly how you hoped they would that first time, it does not mean that you are not worth betting on. It does not mean that you cannot try again. It is one bad hand. It is one bad round. Take what you learned from that experience and apply it to the next round of the game. How can you use that to be even smarter when you place Your next bet? 2. So much of staying in the game is about not waiting for things to be perfect before you go all in. Knowing how to stay in the game and not folding is often a really slow process. It takes time, it takes patience, it takes learning, it takes applying and losing and readjusting and coming back to win again. And it takes patience. And sometimes that can be so hard. We want to play the short game all of the time, but so much of what we're looking for is at the end of the long game. And so knowing that when you step up to the table to play, you probably will have a long game ahead of you. But having a long game ahead of you does not mean that you're waiting for everything to be perfect before you make a move. It means that you play, you figure out what's there, you readjust, you play, you figure out what's there, you readjust. But if you're waiting for the perfect moment, that's very like three Leaf energy, okay? Take the best information you have, make the best decision you can with that information, move forward, readjust, and keep moving. Number three. I don't take the opinions of people who have never played any hand or created or done anything super seriously. And it doesn't mean that I only listen to, like, content creators by any means. But anybody who has placed a bet on themselves, who has built something from scratch, who has taken a risk who has put something out there, who has moved to a new city or who has built a business, or who has tried something new and who has failed, fallen on their face. Like, those are the people whose opinions I take into consideration. I am not super interested in the opinions of people who are merely spectators. And with that, it means you should not let the voices of the crowd who are not in the game talk you out of being at the table. If somebody's never been at the table that you're trying to be at, their opinion should only go so far, which I think not that far, because they don't know. People who only have the perspective of being a spectator, who only have the perspective of being a consumer, and have never put themselves out there in any way, simply don't have the perspective to truly understand where it is you're coming from. So, yes, while feedback can sometimes be helpful if it's given in good faith and if people understand where it is you need to go, do not let the opinions of spectators make you back away from the table again. You have to point at you and say, wow, you are the one who is playing the hand and who is dealing with whatever comes out of the hand that you were dealt. Those who are looking on and who are too scared to play themselves will always have the most to say. And having that discernment of what to listen to versus not is going to be everything. The thing about staying in the game when you're truly betting on yourself is it is an everyday decision. And it's actually those really quiet moments or those ugly moments that make all of the difference, right? It's when you wake up in the morning and you decide not to snooze. It's like keeping that commitment that you made to yourself to not be scrolling on your phone when you know that there is something that you're really working towards. It is that willingness to put yourself out there, even if you don't necessarily know what the outcome is going to be. It's those moments of like when you're shooting in the gym and you're missing shot after shot and you keep shooting, like, those are the moments. That is the stuff that makes staying in the game worth it. Because at some point, if you shoot and if you shoot and if you shoot, you will eventually score, but the only way you are guaranteed to not score is to not shoot. But avoiding those little moments, those boring moments, those mundane moments, my goodness, that. That's where you miss everything. Like, even in my experiences podcasting, like, I've come out With Tuesday episodes from the beginning, since 2018 Tuesday episodes. And when I tell you, there have been so many Monday nights where I was up late recording an episode, editing an episode, writing a blog post, doing those moments, like late in the midnight hour on that Monday night because you know you have something coming out Tuesday, like, those are the moments, the staying in the game that help you score. So don't overlook those little moments or think that you're too good for them, because we're never too good for those little moments. We're never too good for those little things that are going to give us a slight edge. That is what staying in the game means. And if you're not at a point where you're ready to do those little moments, then you might want to go back to the drawing board and figure out, am I working towards something that I really want? Do I want this thing the. The way that I. I say that I want it? Am I leaning a little too much into Three Leaf Clover energy? And is this a moment for me to reposition myself for Four Leaf Clover energy? But it's remembering that the little moments count just as much as the big moments. Before we close out, I have a couple of betting on yourself affirmations that I want to share with you that you can remind yourself of if you're ever having a moment where you're kind of doubting what you're doing. You're wanting to fold, you're wanting to get out of the game that are going to keep you back in it. So the first is the bet I placed on myself will pay off. I just have to stay in the game long enough to collect. The second, I don't fold. When things get hard, I plan my next play. The third, luck is not a lottery. It is leverage. And I build it every time I show up. Repeat those to yourself anytime you feel like you need a little kick in the pants, you need to lean into that four leaf energy. You need a reminder to stay in the game and to take that next next best step. So my homework for you this month, because in May, we're talking all about betting on ourselves and the importance of betting on yourself. I want you to think of one way to bet on yourself, one risk that you want to take, one step you want to take to get a bit closer to that thing that you really want. How are you going to put yourself out there and be in a position to receive it? How can you really embody what it is we talk about here? As she's so lucky in that Four Leaf Clover Energy to bet on yourself. I want you to think about a small bet that you're willing to make this month. And I know that the episodes that we have coming the rest of the month will also inspire you to do that and hearing stories of women who have done the same and can give you that proof of concept. But to kick off the month, I want you to think about a bet that you are willing to make yourself. And I want you to go to our latest post at she so Lucky Pod on Instagram and to tell us what that bet is going to be so that we can all cheer you on. Okay, so to recap what we're doing this month to bet on ourselves, one, we're playing the hand we have. We're not complaining. We're not waiting for a better one. We're not comparing our hand to anyone else. Two, we are rolling the dice. We are taking calculated risks and we are putting ourselves in a position to win. Three, we are betting on that four leaf version of ourselves that rare, that special, that authentic version of you that no one else can be. And four, we are not folding. The game is long and the longer we stay in the game, the more leverage we have. So that is what I have for you for this month's kickoff of the Betting on Yourself series. I hope that this episode was helpful for you. Listen, I'm right here alongside you leaning into that four leaf version of myself in all of this. A lot of what I share in these solo episodes is less of like me preaching at you and more so me giving myself a pep talk that I just so happen to share with you. So I am right in the game alongside you figuring this out and stepping into this version of myself the same way you are now. Couple of things. We need way more of y' all subscribing. If you like to come to the she so Lucky YouTube channel and you like to just dip and dabble and look at videos, but you're not subscribed. Subscribed. We gotta remedy that because right now I think like 60% of our viewers are not subscribed to the channel, which is crazy. If you're more of an audio girl, that's fine too. Make sure that you're subscribed on Spotify. Make sure you're subscribed on Apple so that every single Tuesday we have new episodes come out. You don't miss it. And share this episode with some lucky friends who you think could really benefit from this message. Chew. I'll be back next week where I'M bringing in some special guests to talk more about what betting on themselves means to them to continue inspiring you all month long. Thank you for tuning in and I'll see you next week.
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Thank you for tuning in to this week's episode of she's so Lucky. If you're ready to create your own luck, hit that subscribe subscribe button wherever you get your podcasts or on YouTube so you don't miss an episode and head to the show. Notes for resources, links and discount codes. And if you are really feeling lucky, we would appreciate your rating and your review.
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It really helps us be able to
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improve the show to get great guests and to understand what you want to hear more of. Thank you for tuning in and I'll see you next week.
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Foreign.
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Of ever changing wellness trends and information what does it mean to truly be well? I'm Arielle Lore and I'm going to explore this with you through interviews with world renowned experts in medicine, nutrition, fitness, and even beauty. I am bringing you candid conversations that will equip you with everything you need to live your best life and look good doing it. Think of well as your go to resource for all of the latest in wellness and me as your Internet bestie. New episodes drop every Wednesday. Hope to see you there. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.