[Solo] How to Become A Better Public Speaker

Summary

Balanced Black Girl: [Solo] How to Become A Better Public Speaker

Release Date: September 24, 2024
Host: Les of Balanced Black Girl
Description: In this solo episode, Les delves deep into the art of public speaking, sharing her personal journey, overcoming fears, and offering actionable strategies to help listeners become more confident and effective speakers.

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1. Introduction to Public Speaking

Les opens the episode by acknowledging the common fear surrounding public speaking, noting its prevalence and the significant impact it can have on personal and professional growth.

"Public speaking is ranked up there, one of the top things that people are afraid of. I think I've seen somewhere that a good amount of people are more afraid of public speaking than they are of death."
— Les [04:50]

2. Personal Journey with Public Speaking

Les shares her transformative journey from a timid child to a confident public speaker. She recounts her first daunting experience in sixth grade, where an unprepared presentation left her feeling embarrassed and fearful.

"I froze because I was like, oh, no, this is wrong. And now I have to say out loud that this is wrong."
— Les [09:15]

Participating in summer teen musicals and theater during middle school played a pivotal role in building her confidence. These experiences provided her with a safe space to practice speaking and performing in front of others.

"Doing theater for those summers was a really, really formative experience for me because it got me used to being in front of people and becoming more comfortable being in front of people in ways that I was not when I was younger."
— Les [12:30]

3. Transition to Professional Speaking

After college, Les transitioned into roles that required her to facilitate meetings and present data to executives, further honing her public speaking skills. Her involvement in fitness classes and teaching nutrition to fourth graders also contributed to her ability to engage and communicate effectively with diverse audiences.

"Teaching fitness classes taught me a lot about public speaking and how to hype up a crowd and keep people excited."
— Les [25:20]

4. Overcoming the Fear of Being Seen and Heard

Les delves into the psychological aspects of public speaking, discussing her fear of being made fun of and how she worked to dismantle that fear. She emphasizes the importance of feeling prepared and taking control of the conversation.

"When we're afraid of being in front of people, it's because we're giving control to the audience. We think that the audience is in charge, but you as the speaker are in charge."
— Les [30:10]

5. Strategies for Becoming a Better Public Speaker

a. Preparation and Practice

Les underscores the critical role of preparation in building confidence. She shares her routine of scripting and rehearsing her podcast episodes to ensure clarity and coherence.

"Preparation is what helps ease some of those worries. When you rehearse what you're going to say, it builds so much more confidence."
— Les [35:45]

b. Formal Training and Classes

She recommends enrolling in public speaking or improv classes as a structured way to develop speaking skills. Organizations like Toastmasters are highlighted as excellent platforms for continuous improvement.

"Toastmasters has been around forever... that's another really great safe space for you to be able to practice public speaking."
— Les [39:00]

c. Informal Practice Opportunities

Les encourages listeners to seek out everyday opportunities to speak, whether it's leading a meeting at work, facilitating a game night, or speaking at church. These small steps can significantly build confidence over time.

"Finding small ways to public speak wherever you are... will get you feeling a lot more comfortable presenting to people."
— Les [41:10]

d. Studying Effective Speakers

She advises studying speeches and presentations by renowned speakers like Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, and Barack Obama to understand effective delivery techniques, such as pacing, tone, and the use of pauses.

"Study these people who are great speakers... learn those strategies and then start practicing."
— Les [43:25]

e. Creating a Private Practice Space

Les suggests creating a private podcast or recording yourself to practice speaking without the pressure of an audience. This method allows for self-review and gradual improvement.

"You can create little private podcasts where you just share with your friends and ask for feedback."
— Les [45:30]

6. Embracing Control and Confidence

A recurring theme in Les's discussion is the empowerment that comes from taking control of the speaking environment. By controlling the message and pacing, speakers can navigate conversations more effectively and reduce anxiety.

"Find power in being in control of the conversation. You control the pace, the message, and where the audience goes."
— Les [50:00]

7. Encouragement and Final Thoughts

Les concludes the episode with an encouraging message, assuring listeners that with dedication and practice, anyone can overcome their fear of public speaking. She invites listeners to share their own journeys and strategies, fostering a community of support.

"Your voice has value. What you have to say matters. You can deliver something in a way that no one else can."
— Les [54:20]

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Key Takeaways:

• Preparation is Paramount: Thorough preparation builds confidence and reduces anxiety.
• Seek Out Practice Opportunities: Whether formal or informal, consistent practice is essential.
• Study and Emulate Effective Speakers: Learning from the best can enhance your own speaking style.
• Take Control of the Narrative: As the speaker, you guide the conversation and manage audience engagement.
• Embrace Continuous Improvement: Public speaking is a skill that can always be refined and perfected.

Les's heartfelt and comprehensive exploration of public speaking serves as a valuable resource for anyone looking to enhance their communication skills. By blending personal anecdotes with practical advice, she provides a roadmap for transforming fear into confidence and becoming an impactful speaker.

Transcript

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Thank you for listening to Balance Black Girl. My name is Les, I'm your host and I appreciate you tapping in. So over the past, I would say probably six months or so, our community here at Balanced Black Girl has grown a lot, which has been so, so exciting. But that means that if you are a newer listener to Balance Black Girl, you just started listening in 2024 or watching on YouTube. That's where a lot of our growth has come from. Then you may not know more of my backstory, particularly in the professional area. So, yes, I do this podcast and content full time now as of beginning of 2024, but for the first five years of the podcast, that was not the case. I actually did it as a side hustle. So I had corporate job the whole time and I was podcasting on the side. Left my corporate job back in December of 2023 and started full time in January 2024. And when I went full time to do the podcast, I really wanted to do more speaking. Speaking is a skill that I've definitely cultivated over the years, particularly with podcasting. And so getting to participate in different events, do more speaking, being on panels, moderating panels, was something that I was really excited to have more time to get to do. And it's something that I've been really fortunate to get to do. Since I've gone full time and also now being based in New York, there's just so many more events and opportunities to speak. And I've been really, really grateful to get to do a lot of that. And with that, I do get a lot of questions from people about public speaking, of how did you get comfortable public speaking? Do you have more tips for becoming a better public speaker? So that is what we're going to talk about in today's episode. Public speaking is something that I think can be really intimidating for people and it can be a little bit nerve wracking, especially if you don't have much practice with it. I think it is ranked up there, one of the top things that people are afraid of. I think I've seen somewhere that a good amount of people are more afraid of public speaking than they are of death, which I think is interesting. I think that's maybe a little bit dramatic. But I'm not here to, you know, judge anyone's fear, but I think that public speaking can be a lot less scary if you learn how to approach it differently. So public speaking is either something that you're afraid of, or it's not something you're necessarily afraid of, but you want to be better at, then today's episode is for you. And even if you're not somebody who wants to do professional speaking or to be on panels or anything like that, still having the ability to public speak and to feel comfortable with public speaking is super important because there's so many different scenarios where we may public speak, whether that's in corporate spaces. Or facilitating meetings or at family events and gatherings, or at church or. There's so many different ways that we can have public speaking be a part of our lives. And even if it's not something that you do or plan to do every day, just having the skill set and learning how to be more comfortable so that if it is asked of you, you don't feel fearful of it is really, really important. And I think that the ability to public speak is just a crucial skill for anybody who wants to have a certain amount of success or visibility. I know many of our girlies are in their successful eras, and being able to speak publicly is a big part of that. So I want to talk a bit more about my experiences with public speaking and how I came to be more comfortable with public speaking, because I certainly was not always, and it has been kind of a long journey to this point. Now, first, I will say as a bit of an astrology girly, I had to do just a little bit, just a little something to talk a little bit more about astrology when it comes to how we speak and communicate, especially as I've learned more about astrology, particularly my own astrology, it has helped me understand my communication style a lot more. So if you're not familiar with astrology, or maybe you are, we all have something called a birth chart, and that means that we all have different placements in different planets. And so a lot of us think of our sun sign. If we say, I'm a Leo, I'm a Virgo, I'm a this, I'm a that, that's your sun sign. But you actually have 11 other placements in your birth chart that can just give you insight into how you move about the world. And so the planet that you want to pay attention to, if you're looking at speaking or communication, is Mercury. So your Mercury placement can tell you a little bit more about how you tend to communicate. So when I first got my birth chart pulled a couple years ago, I learned that my Mercury is in the sign of Virgo. And this was a really big aha moment for me in understanding how I communicate. So as a Mercury in Virgo person, it means that I tend to communicate like a Virgo. Very exact, very direct, very clear, very linear. That is my communication style. And I think that it has lent itself well to something like podcasting, because I'm able to get a point across very directly and concisely. But everybody can communicate a little bit differently depending on what your Mercury is. So if you are really wanting to be A better public speaker. If you're wanting to be a more effective speaker to learn a little bit more about your own communication style, it could be worth just checking out your birth chart and seeing where Mercury is, because your Mercury placement will tell you a little bit more about your natural gifts and inclinations when it comes to communication and speaking. And so for me, as a Mercury and Virgo person, I'm not super surprised that my job is now what it is. But it again, took me a long time to get to a point where I was comfortable with that. So my very first experience public speaking that I can remember was a really horrible experience that I had in sixth grade. I was doing an extra credit assignment, and the assignment was to write a story about. I think we had to write a story about the eruption of Mount Rainier, which is terrifying to think about because if you are from the Pacific Northwest, Mount Rainier is right there. And if that bad boy erupts, it is bad news for all of us. So the idea that we had to write a story about it and then read it in front of the class, now that I'm looking back on, it was actually kind of a terrible assignment for children. But I did it because I wanted extra credit in my science class. And, you know, I wrote this story about Mount Rainier erupting, and I got in front of the class to read it, and as I was kind of getting ready to read it out loud, I realized that some of the things that I wrote in my story were just not, like, scientifically accurate. And I didn't catch it until that very moment. And so as I'm starting to read it and I'm realizing that some of the things that I had in my story just were incorrect or didn't make sense, I froze because I was like, oh, no, this is wrong. And now I have to say out loud that this is wrong. Like, I didn't necessarily have the skills to, like, improv something different. And so I was just slowly, painfully reading this scientifically incorrect story as an 11 year old in front of the class. And it wasn't, you know, super traumatic. I wouldn't say that it necessarily haunts me. I honestly forgot all about that experience until I sat down to prep for this episode and I had to really think about when did I start public speaking? And that was the first memory that came to mind. So it's not something that, you know, haunts me, but it was super uncomfortable. And the lesson that I learned there was that I feel a lot more comfortable speaking when I Feel prepared. So I had probably written that story the night before and, like, not really done a very good job fact checking or editing or practicing. I just, like, wrote a story down and went to go get in front of the class to read it and realize, oh, this story ain't it. And I learned a really valuable lesson about preparation. And I learned that I feel more confident when I feel competent in what I'm doing. And I've talked about this before on the podcast. Actually did an episode all about how to improve your confidence last year. We will link that in the show notes. It was before I started doing YouTube. Wait a minute, was it? No, actually, I do think that episode is on YouTube. I think we do also have a YouTube version, so we will link those in the show notes. But one of the things that I've learned most about confidence is that confidence comes from feeling prepared and from feeling competent. And so even though that wasn't the best public speaking experience, it wasn't one where I did particularly well. I did not fall in love with public speaking in that moment by any means. I learned that when I don't necessarily handle my business and do a good job being prepared, it makes public speaking be a lot harder. I will also say as a kid, I was a really quiet kid. I wasn't necessarily the most, you know, outspoken or extroverted. And so I did still need a lot of time to come into using my voice because I just have always naturally been a quiet person, but especially as a child, I was very, very quiet. I really didn't like using my voice and being seen and being heard. I would pretty much keep my head down and stay to myself a lot. And when I started getting a lot more comfortable using my voice was a few years later when I started getting into theater. So towards the end of middle school, I started participating in what was called the summer teen musical in my city. Every year, the city would do a summer teen musical where kids, you know, ages 13 to 19 can sign up and we're the cast, we're the crew, we put together this whole musical. There are adults supervising and directing, but we as kids kind of do most of the putting everything together. You know, we help make the sets, we do it all. And so I did the summer teen musical for three summers in a row, the summer after 8th, 9th, and 10th grade. And I was never very good, like, not a very good singer, not a very good actor, not a very good dancer. I never had big roles. I never was like the star of the show by any means. But Participating in theater really helped me build a lot more confidence around being seen, and it made me a lot less fearful of being seen. It provided a really safe space for me to get in front of people, for me to use my voice in ways that I didn't feel, you know, judged or scared. We had all summer to practice and rehearse before we run the show for two weeks at the end of the summer. So it really taught me a lot about preparation, about building that confidence and practicing and rehearsing and feeling really prepared for the end result. So doing theater for those summers was a really, really formative experience for me because it got me used to being in front of people and becoming more comfortable being in front of people in ways that I was not when I was younger. I will also say that as a theater kid, you know, there's lots of different games and exerc and things that we do that are really similar to what you get in a professional public speaking class. Like, I have since taken professional public speaking classes as an adult, and a lot of the activities and things that we do is exactly what we did as, you know, summer theater kids. It's literally the same games, the same exercises, very similar just to get you feeling comfortable in your body, thinking on your feet. Very similar to doing, you know, improv classes and stuff like that. So it's really all about building the skills of being able to think on your feet and feeling comfortable being in front of other people. So that was when things started turning around a little bit for me, where I started feeling a little bit more comfortable being seen, being heard, and being in front of people.

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Fast forward a bit to my first job out of college, and I found myself in positions at this company where I was, you know, 22, 23 years old, and I was responsible for facilitating meetings with these executives who were twice my age, usually, you know, middle aged white men who were very important, made a lot of decisions, and I was responsible for wrangling them, presenting data to them, making sure that everybody had their chance to, you know, speak up in these meetings and share their information, making sure their projects were on track. And so that was a lot of really good practice with learning how to steer a conversation. You know, if we have 30 minutes for everybody to get through their deck, or if we have an hour for everybody to get through their deck, and, you know, you have that one exec who always goes left and who always, you know, derails everything and makes the conversation take a turn. I learned a lot about how to carefully guide people on track. I learned a lot about how to facilitate a conversation so that everybody gets what they need to get in an hour. And that has helped me so much. Even now as a podcaster. Now when I'm sitting down and I'm interviewing people and maybe I have a guest who's like veering off track a little bit, I now know how to bring them back in. From what I learned at my job, facilitating meetings with these executives and having to do so respectfully and gently because I'm half their age and I'm fresh out of college and I don't really know what's going on, but it's my job to keep everybody on track. So that was another experience that was really, really helpful. And also in those roles, I was responsible for running a lot of meetings. So I also had to present a lot. I had to present a lot of data that I, you know, had to do a lot of work to understand. I had to present to a lot of different audiences. And I wouldn't say that I was amazing at it. Especially when I first started, I would definitely be very nervous and pretty timid. But over time, I became more comfortable. And once I got to my mid-20s, I had a few formative experiences that really changed the game for me when it came to my comfort being able to public speak. The first was working in fitness. So I, you know, had become a personal trainer. I'd become a group Fitness instructor and teaching fitness classes taught me a lot about how to speak. When you are in a room in front of a group of sweaty people and they are tired and they do not want to hear what you're talking about because you're trying to tell them to do something hard that they don't want to do, and you're trying to keep it lively and fun and engaging. That taught me a lot about public speaking and how to hype up a crowd and how to get people excited around something that they may not be excited about. And then I also worked part time for a nonprofit organization where I taught nutrition classes to fourth graders. And so I had to get in front of, you know, classrooms of fourth graders, teaching them this two and a half hour workshop about nutrition. And it was very similar where I had to communicate a point very succinctly to keep their attention. I had to get them excited about something that they probably thought was pretty boring. And I had to learn how to project and speak with confidence because kids do not care about your feelings. They don't care what you're talking about. If they don't like you, if it's boring, if they're not interested, you will know. And so that was like public speaking boot camp, being in front of those fourth graders week after week. And so I noticed, you know, after I'd had some of my fitness classes under my belt, after I had some of those nutrition classes with the fourth graders under my belt, I started getting really good feedback at work about my ability to speak and present in these meetings. I was getting, you know, managers and executives being like, les, you know, your speaking skills are getting so much better. You're facilitating so much better. The way that you presented in that meeting was so strong. Keep up the good work. And I was able to create that correlation between, you know, the fitness classes I was teaching, the nutrition classes I was teaching, and my ability to present well in a professional setting. Because honestly, presenting to fourth graders and presenting to middle aged executives is so similar. Their attention spans so similar. They will check out, they will veer off, they will interrupt. The behavior is very similar. So by learning and cutting my teeth on being able to speak in front of fourth graders, it made me a much more effective speaker in front of adults. So then in my late 20s, I found myself in positions where I was beginning to public speak a lot more outside of just the classroom, the gym, and, you know, the conference rooms that I was in because I had taken a job for this women's co working space. And at the time, the space used to host a lot of events. Pretty much anytime there was like a big event happening or an event around women in business or anything like that, you know, the place that I worked at was truly like the hub. And I was a social media manager. So I was often at these events capturing content. And there were many times where at the last minute to be like, hey, there's nobody to introduce a speaker. Like, les hop on stage and do it. Or like, we need a facilitator. Last minute, less hop on stage, moderate this panel just at the last minute where I just had to jump in and just do it. And so being kind of pushed on stage to do those things without even having the time to be nervous, because it was like, let's go now, do it. I didn't even have time to be scared. I didn't have time to be nervous. I just had to kind of lock in and learn how to do it. This was also at the same time that I started the podcast. That was also back when I started Balance Black Girl. This was back in 2018, 2019, the early days. And so the podcast was also giving me so much practice speaking, especially back then, because it was audio only. You really had to be able to deliver a message. If there was no video to help, if there was none of that, you had to be able to speak directly to people. And it was like public speaking boot camp week after week after week. And through that, through having the podcast, through beginning to facilitate a bit at events that were held at my job, I started getting more opportunities to be able to participate in panels because people realized that I could speak or I was getting sent to different events on behalf of my job because I had then built those chops and become a more seasoned speaker. And so after the past several years of having those experiences, that is where I've really gotten to the point where I am today, where I feel a lot more comfortable getting in front of crowds, speaking, being able to think on my feet, being able to answer questions on my feet, moderating panels, delivering keynotes, being on panels, a lot of it has really come from putting in the reps and really getting that practice. But so much of that valuable experience in the classroom, in summer teen musicals in the conference room really helped me build the skills to where they are now. And I think a lot of you probably have had similar experiences where you're facilitating meetings at work, where maybe you did plays at school, maybe you did present things when you were younger, and you just haven't connected the dots of seeing that actually you do have more experience than you think you do. You just haven't, like, woven that through line. So the awareness of that through line, I think is really, really important for building that confidence of seeing you actually do have experience in this. You actually have done this. Can you practice more and hone in on it and feel more confident? Absolutely. But you probably have already had really valuable public speaking experience that you can learn from. So that has been my experience. Becoming more comfortable as a public speaker over time. Again, like I said, I was a really sh. I was a really quiet kid. I absolutely choked in front of my sixth grade science class. Even, you know, being a theater kid, I was never very good, never had a big role, never the star. But I think we can learn from anything. And for someone like me, who was so quiet and so afraid of being seen and so afraid of being heard when I was younger, if I can overcome that fear to now speak for a living, when I used to be so afraid of speaking when I was younger, I absolutely know that you can as well. So a big part of being comfortable as a public speaker is getting through the fear of being seen and being heard. I think that is what is often so scary for people. People are really scared of, well, what if I mess up? Or what if I say the wrong thing? Or what if I get a question that I can't answer and everybody is looking at me? What's been helpful for me is remembering that as the speaker, you are the one who's in control. And so when we're afraid of the audience, when we're. When we're afraid of being in front of people, it's because we're giving control to the audience. We think that the audience is in charge, but you as a speaker are in charge. You as the person on the stage, or you as the person with the mic, are in charge. You're the one driving the car. The audience goes wherever you take them. So you control the pace of the conversation, you control what is shared, you control what is not. Oftentimes, even if you mess up, people may not necessarily know unless you point it out. You get to control where the conversation goes. And with that comes so much peace.

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[A]

Being seen and being heard can be really scary. And I think really learning how to dismantle that fear of what is so scary about it for you can be really important. So for me, when I was younger, a big part of what made me so afraid of, like, being seen and heard was just not wanting to be made fun of. You know, I was pretty lucky that in a lot of ways as a kid, I was able to kind of slide under the radar, especially in, like, elementary and middle school, where I didn't necessarily get, you know, bullied or anything like that. But I think a lot of it was because I was so quiet and I was able to kind of go undetected. And I felt like, well, if people can detect me, if people can see me, if people can hear me, then people can mess with me, or then people can make fun of me, but if I just don't say anything, I'm not giving them anything to work with. And it was a really effective strategy as a child, but not super effective as an adult who has a mission that you want to move about in the world. And so I really had to learn how to dismantle that. And a lot of that learning is from understanding that if people have something to say, they're going to have something to say regardless of whatever material you do and don't give them. But if you have something that you need to speak, or if your ability to speak is necessary to get you where you need to be, then that is what it is. And you need to figure out a way to build that bravery to move through it. Another thing, and I touched on this earlier when I gave my example about my bombing my sixth grade science story reading was I talked about lack of preparation. So oftentimes we feel afraid that we're going to say the wrong thing or that we're going to do the wrong thing or that we're going to mess up. And preparation is what helps ease some of those worries. When you rehearse what you're going to say, when you take the time to put together a thoughtful outline, when you're presenting in a meeting and you know your numbers and you know your data and you have done your due diligence, it builds so much more confidence in what you're saying and what you're doing because you can back it up. And so really taking the time to allow yourself Adequate space to prepare and to feel confident in what you're saying is going to help you so much as a speaker, as does practice. And this isn't something that a lot of people really talk about. So many amazing, talented speakers practice. You know, they practice their speeches, they practice their delivery. They ask other people for feedback. Even for this podcast. Usually what I'll do, particularly for the solo episodes, is I will write out script or an outline of what each episode is going to be. And at home, before I come to the studio, I'm rehearsing it, I'm reading through it, I'm reading it out loud to make sure that it makes sense and that I'm able to deliver that point so that when I sit down to record, the content is in me because I've rehearsed it, because I know it, because I'm ready to bring it forward. And so preparation is what can help us bring a lot of that confidence out. When we are in the position to be able to speak, when we can do things like anticipate the questions that are going to be asked of us, we feel less thrown off when we do. You get those questions. So if you think about it from the audience perspectives, what are they going to be wondering? What is the questions that they're going to have? Does what you're saying leave any questions unanswered? And how can you integrate that into whatever it is that you're creating so that you feel more confident in how you deliver it is going to be super, super important. And also being able to say, I don't know. But let me get back to you. If someone does ask you a question that you don't have the answer to is okay. There's so much power in that you don't have to know every single thing in the moment all the time, or if you are delivering a message. Sometimes we feel this need to rush because we're nervous and we talk so fast and we da, da, da. You know, we want to get everything out. Knowing that it's okay to pause, knowing that sometimes our pacing actually can create so much more power in what we share. There's not a lot of power in just speeding through a point, but knowing when to leverage a pause, knowing when to take a breath, that could really help you emphasize a message. So instead of seeing it as I'm on a stage, everybody is looking at me. This is so scary. Think of it as I am having a conversation that I am in full control of. I control the message, I control the pacing, and everybody who's listening right now goes exactly where I'm telling them to go. They go where I'm bringing them. So there's not anyone throwing me off or saying something, you know, crazy, unless you maybe have like a heckler or something, which is probably not going to happen. Everybody who's listening goes where you want them to go. So find power in being in control of the conversation. As I had mentioned earlier, a lot of my fear around being seen and heard when I was younger was around perceived safety. We have this idea of thinking, okay, if I hide, if people can't see me, if people can't hear me, then I am safe. And it's often a false sense of safety that we give ourselves. And so if you are finding yourself being particularly fearful of speaking or of putting yourself out there, it's also really important to affirm your safety and to make sure that you are in environments that do help you feel safe. So if you are practicing your public speaking, doing so in places where maybe people can give you constructive feedback, but it's not going to be something that is so harsh. Or maybe if you have a speech that you need to give or presentation that you need to give, practicing it with somebody who you know is going to tell you the truth, if you need feedback, but who is going to deliver it in a way that is kind and is thoughtful, can create a sense of safety as you prepare for what is required of you. So really getting to the root of that fear, what is it specifically about speaking that makes you afraid and how can you tackle that? And it's even something that I've still talked about in therapy and not necessarily public speaking, but I'm still working through some of my own fears around being seen and being heard and that perceived sense of safety from hiding, which doesn't necessarily make us more safe. Again, it's like a coping mechanism. If we do need to talk about it in therapy, if we do need to journal about it, if we do need to figure out where that's from and do the work to really dismantle it, it is absolutely worthwhile because you have valuable things to say, you have valuable things to share. And if these fears are stopping you from doing that, then it's absolutely worth getting to the bottom of and learning how to dismantle. So when it comes to working through the fears of public speaking, really understanding where is that fear coming from and how can you address what the actual fear is is going to be key. And then making sure that you're giving yourself adequate time and space to prepare so that you can feel as confident as possible is going to be so important. So again, that research piece that knowing what you're talking about piece, that rehearsal piece, that practice piece so that you can get more and more comfortable in delivering a message is going to be super important. So next, I want to talk about some tactical ways that you can become a better public speaker. I talked about some of the things that have helped me, which have been a little bit more informal in nature. Things like being a theater kid was really helpful. Being in charge of presenting at a lot of meetings early in my career was really helpful. My former nutrition work with elementary school students was really helpful. Teaching fitness classes was really helpful. Those were all kind of informal things that helped me become a better public speaker. But there are also more formal things that you can do. Also, I recognize, you know, if you're listening to this podcast, you're probably not, you know, in middle school doing like summer teen musicals or necessarily want to become like a fitness instructor for that purpose. There are things that you can do to become a better public speaker. So the first thing I would say would be looking into some sort of local public speaking or improv class. Google like public speaking classes near me, there will often be, you know, comedy programs, theater programs that will have public speaking and improv classes that you can participate in. So this will often be a safe container for a certain number of weeks where you will learn key skills related to public speaking. Improv classes are also really great for anybody who wants to be a public speaker, because improv will teach you how to think, think on your feet. What can be so scary about public speaking is like, well, what if someone asks a crazy question? Or what if something happens? What if I don't know how to respond? Improv teaches you how to respond. It teaches you how to come up with things on the fly. Like I said, a lot of the things that I learned in improv and public speaking classes, or a lot of the exercises were exactly verbatim what we used to do as theater kids. So it's very similar energy, but it's like theater camp for adults. But this is a safe space where everybody is coming to learn. Nobody is there to judge you. That teacher is truly there to help you. So it's a worthwhile investment in yourself. Another really great resource if you are looking for ways to be a better public speaker is Toastmasters. Toastmasters has been around for forever. There's so many local chapters that you can go to in your city. There may even be Toastmasters at your company, depending on where you work. I used to work at a company back in the day that actually had Toastmasters chapters within the company and so I would pop into like Toastmasters meetings every once in a while. That's another really great safe space for you to be able to practice public speaking and they've been around for forever. So you can look up Toastmasters practices near you so that you can join a chapter, you can take those classes, you can go to their meetings and get practice public speaking in a safe container the next. If you want to take a bit more of an informal approach, or let's say maybe there isn't a Toastmasters or public speaking class option available, near you would be doing things kind of like I described in my own journey of finding small ways to public speak wherever you are. So if there is maybe a meeting that your team has every week at work, volunteering to facilitate it, volunteering to present some information, and again, doing things in these small ways, even if you're just doing it via Zoom, will get you feeling a lot more comfortable presenting to people. If you're working on a group project to be the person who presents it again, it can feel scary, but that is how you're going to move through the fear. So what are some small ways that you can just practice getting in front of people? Whether that's at work, whether that's with your friends hosting a game night and being the person who facilitates the game, whether that's getting in front of people at church? Church is a great place to practice public speaking if you go and if you're not already involved volunteering and finding some way to be able to speak there. Find little ways that you can get in front of people who already know you and love you and are going to be a receptive audience to the things that you have to share just so that you can start getting more comfortable speaking in front of people.

[B]

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[A]

The next thing that you can do, because I think podcasting has helped me so much when it comes to public speaking and content creation in general, has helped me when it comes to public speaking, is that you can practice creating your own little private podcast. You can create your own little finsta that is just you recording videos of yourself to practice speaking and delivering a message. And this doesn't even have to be for an audience. This can be private. You can create a private Instagram account that is not linked to your phone number so people don't find it. Make it private. And you can practice, practice going live on there even if nobody can see. Practice recording videos of yourself speaking and then review them to review what it is that you can do better. You can create little private podcasts that maybe you just share with your friends and ask for feedback around what you can do better. Any opportunity that you can do to speak, whether that is to an audience of yourself or just to a few other people, is going to help you feel so much more comfortable speaking. So again, you can use content to your advantage. It does not have to be in front of people. It does not have to be to build a following. It does not have to be to build an audience. It can truly be your own personal portfolio for you to measure how far you come and to keep yourself accountable. But nobody else has to see it. It doesn't have to be to build an audience. It doesn't have to be for other people at all. But it can be a really great way to practice. The next thing I would say in terms of how to be a better public speaker is to really study speaking, is to become a student of the art of speaking. Because anybody who you admire, who is a good speaker, had to learn how to do it, even if they are already naturally charismatic or extroverted or a good talker. There is a difference between being a good talker and being a good speaker, because a lot of people are good at talking and they don't say nothing. Okay, Think about the biggest yapper. You know, just because somebody yaps doesn't mean that if they have a microphone, it'll sound good and make any sense. People have to learn how to deliver a message. So really take the time to study. Something that I've done for years, that I still love to do is I will watch speeches and I will watch TED Talks and I will literally study them from all different types of speakers. And not only will I be listening for the message, but I will know how do they deliver a message? How do they use their pauses? How do they handle interruptions? How does their tone of voice change depending on what the message is? How easy was their message to follow? And I will literally study it like a football player studying tape. You know, if you listen to the athlete episode, that'll be a cute little reference there. But I will literally study these people who are great speakers. You know, we just had the DNC pass. There were so many amazing speeches. This. Pull them up, rewatch them, and study them, this time not for necessarily the content of what they're saying, but for the delivery. How does Michelle Obama deliver a speech? What are the tactics that she uses to deliver a speech? And she's given us so many great speeches at all the DNCs for the past several years. How does she deliver a speech? How does Oprah deliver a speech? How does Barack Obama deliver a speech? What are the different strategies that they use to tell a story and to captivate an audience? Study it. All of them had to study how to do that. Now they have coaches, I'm sure, and people and speech writers and teams who help them. But you can study what they do to learn how they effectively deliver a message. If there are podcasters that you love, instead of just listening for what they're saying, listen to how they deliver it. If there are YouTubers that you love, how do they speak when they get in front of the camera? How do they emphasize different words? How do they control the pace? How does their tone of voice change when they're talking about different things? You could even use this podcast as an example of that. How does my tone of voice change when I'm doing a solo episode versus when I'm sitting down to interview somebody? Because it's actually very different depending on the episode. So really get in the habit of studying something. If you want to get better at it, look to people who are doing what it is you want to do and study it, review it. Watch those TED Talks, watch those speeches, watch those podcasts, and see if there's any patterns that you can pick up on. How are they delivering a message? How are they keeping me engaged as a listener and as a watcher? How are they getting their point across? How are they using things like pauses and silence? How are they using the stage? And really learn those strategies and then start practicing. You can create little speeches at home. You can, you know, make up little stories. Maybe. Maybe we can make up a story about Mount Rainier that's scientifically accurate, unlike what I did as a sixth grader. And you can practice at home using the strategies that you study from other people to get those reps in. Also, getting feedback from other people is huge. So if you do, you know, create a little fake speech or do a little fake, fake debate at home, getting someone to give you feedback, if you are facilitating in meetings, getting someone on your team to give you feedback and being able to take it openly and honestly for what you can do to improve is going to be so helpful to help you become a better speaker. So it's really about becoming a student, being willing to release the fear of being seen and heard, focusing on how you can control the pace of the conversation, and really learning how to hone in the craft. Because like I said, there is a really big difference between yapping and between speaking. They're not the same thing at all. Yapping is like yapping to yap. Speaking is you're delivering a message to an audience and you need them to follow. Because sometimes a little hard to follow yapping, but it's easier to follow a message that is being intentionally delivered. So when you think about what resonates with you when you are listening to someone speak, if you hear a speech that really moves, you start dissecting it and understanding what is it that they did really well. How does that match my communication style or my Mercury sign? As you can kind of investigate and figure out to adapt that and create your own style and then start practicing and then get feedback and incorporate the feedback and practice again. And practice again. And practice some more. And it can be really uncomfortable. And you have these moments where it feels like, ooh, like, not great. But that is how you get better. That is how you push through. That is how you learn. If the desire to be a better public speaker has been placed on your heart, it has been placed on your heart for a reason. It is because you have a message that you're meant to deliver in some way, in some form. So don't ignore that. Lean into that. Be willing to learn. Be willing to stumble a little bit. It's okay if you stumble on it a little bit. Nobody remembers my bomb of a Mount Rainier story in sixth grade, but if I would have stopped public speaking after that, I wouldn't even have, you know, this podcast or all of the other amazing opportunities that come from it. We all have off days for maybe we're not speaking with the most clarity, or maybe we don't deliver a message perfectly, but that's okay because there's always next time. All of those practice reps that you put in to deliver a message is going to be super important to help you become a better speaker. Your voice has value. What you have to say matters. You can deliver something in a way that no one else can. So let yourself do that. Be willing to be a student of it. Put in the reps, put in the practice and I promise that you can feel more comfortable as a public speaker as well. So that is what I have for you today. It is a little bit more of like a career action oriented episode. If you are somebody who wants to become a better public speaker, I would love to hear from you in the comments. You can either leave a comment on YouTube, you can leave a comment on Spotify, or you can go leave a comment on our latest post on Instagram and let me know what you're doing to become a better public public speaker. Are you taking classes? Are you doing improv? Are you speaking up at church? Are you going to facilitate a meeting at work? Are you going to join Toastmasters? Are you going to study some TED talks? Let me know what it is you are choosing to do to become a better public speaker. Happy to give you recommendations and cheer you on. Thank you so much for listening to this week's episode of Balanced Black Girl. If you enjoyed this episode, please make sure that you are subscribed on app, Spotify, YouTube. Subscribe on all three if you're really feeling generous. Okay, we love, we love the support. Leave us a rating and a review. It's an amazing way for you to support the show for free. Free 99 we just need your five stars because we're five star girlies offering a five star experience. And make sure that you share this podcast with a friend if it was helpful for you. Thank you again for tuning in and I will see you next week.

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Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.