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Home Depot, which means it's time to add new cordless power to your collection. Right now, when you buy a select.
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Psst. You didn't hear this from me, but.
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Normal Gossip is back for its ninth season. Join me, Rachel Hampton, as I share the juiciest gossip from the real world with some very special guests. This season, we're bringing back some old friends, a Radiotopia buddy, and for the first time ever, a Nobel laureate. That's right, we have Malala on season nine. Normal Gossip is out on all your favorite podcast platforms.
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My name is Bob the Drag Queen.
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And I'm Monet's James, and this is simply rivalry. On this week's episode, Bob the Drag Queen rewinds back.
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We talk about reeds, and we find.
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Out what made Bob say this.
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Cook him a meal and he'll never leave. And we found out what made Monet say this.
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They hated that. Do you hear? Are you excited for Christmas coming?
B
Yeah, I like Christmas, you know? Yeah, I like Christmas. Christmas is the yuletide is my favorite time of year.
A
The things change over really quickly. Most wonderful time of the year. Two basses singing. You're a bass baritone.
B
Yeah, I think I'm a baritone.
A
No, you're a bass baritone.
B
You gonna ask me to tell me?
A
I'm listening to your voice. You're a bass baritone. Like, where do you top out at.
B
E above high C. Okay.
A
All right.
B
What, you're gonna ask me above now?
A
Ready for a serious conversation?
B
You're gonna not answer my. Accept my answer.
A
We'll sing the E above high C over here.
B
I can't do it without a piano. That's a C. That's the C. Do.
A
The E above it.
B
What's the E? What does that sound like?
A
The little riff down.
B
I think I can actually go higher than you think I can.
A
No, but singing with your. Like, your chest.
B
It's gotta be with chest. Audrey McDonald doesn't sing with her chest.
A
But she's a soprano. You're not a soprano.
B
Her voice, her notes don't matter.
A
You're not a soprano. You're a bass baritone.
B
I'm a baritone, mainly.
A
Okay.
B
If I were in once in this island, I would be playing Asuka.
A
No, Ahsoka.
B
Her name's Asaka.
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Asaka.
B
I be playing Agwe, God of water.
A
Do you know what I really wanna dive deeper into and research more? What? I love these African gods, like Yoruba.
B
And like, do you know about Anansi?
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Anansi? Spider.
B
Anansi. He is a spider, right? Anansi. He is so bright. So bright. Anansi. He is a spider and I can't remember.
A
He's a trickster God and of African origin.
B
Yes.
A
Like, I don't know the proper names, but like, they, like. Sza evokes them a lot. Beyonce evokes them a lot. Erykah Badu evokes these God as God.
B
But they mention them in their work.
A
Yeah, they mention them in their work or they say that they're giving honor to them or stuff like that. But I don't really know much about it.
B
I would name my kid Anansi.
A
Anansi.
B
Anansi. It's a great name.
A
There's a St Lucian child nursery rhyme or something about Anansi Spiderweb. Although it does like a TV show about Anansi Spiderweb.
B
Yeah, he's kind of like. He's a puck kinda.
A
He's like a. Look like a Loki, kind of.
B
Yeah, he's a. Yeah, yeah. He loves to play tricks on people. But he's not bad. But he's not great.
A
He's a. He's a Brad. Locally, you came over yesterday. You played Marvel Rivals. You were very good at it.
B
I didn't like it.
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Really?
B
I didn't like it.
A
You were good, though.
B
I know, but it wasn't fun. I was like. I hate this.
A
Really?
B
Yeah. I was Scarlet Witch and I was just. I was just pointing and blasting.
A
So you're. You're. You're. You're like. Because she has auto aim. So, like, when you hold it, it just automatically gets whoever. Who's. Whoever is closest to her.
B
So I wasn't even doing anything.
A
I mean, you were doing something. You were killing people.
B
I had. I think I only died one time. I had, like, a great track record too.
A
Wow. People like Monet should start playing League of Legends.
B
I got the whole crew into it. Now. You're the last. You're the last holdout.
A
But I don't like computer games and there are so many computer games I want to play, but I just. I'm not interested in doing this.
B
Okay. You're not typing.
A
That's what it feels like, you're not, like, typing.
B
You're doing this. Actually, you're doing this. This is what you're doing in a computer game.
A
Usually I feel like when I play computer games, I'm playing. You know why I'm so triggered from having to do Mavis Beacon in elementary. Whatever grade that was.
B
Do you know about wasd?
A
What are symbols doing? No, what?
B
WASD is like moving on the game, but you use WASD as up, left, down, and right wasd. W is up, A is left, S is down, and D is right.
A
Got it. But why not use the directional, like the actual arrow?
B
The letter keyboard has that.
A
Not every keyboard has arrows.
B
Nope.
A
I thought that's standard.
B
Not every keyboard has arrows.
A
Huh.
B
Jake, does your lockup have arrows? I guess that one does, yeah. They don't know, but not every. Not every keyboard has arrows.
A
I don't think I've ever encountered one in a. Do you know.
B
Does my keyboard in there have arrows? Taylor, can you check it real quick? Does my keyboard in there have arrows?
A
Can you check it real quick? I think it does.
B
You can bring it in here. It might.
A
I think all keyboards. Not all, but everything. Every keyboard I've come in contact with has an arrow on it.
B
Are the arrows on it? Oh, yeah. Four little arrows. Yeah, there they are.
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Yep, four of them.
B
More arrows. I don't want to press because then.
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My computer's still on. I don't want to accidentally press. And you don't activate your porn.
B
I don't watch porn on my office computer. I don't think any. Who is still watching porn on a computer? Who. Who is looking at porn on a computer?
A
You just do it on your. On your. On your phone.
B
It's. Yes. First of all, if you're looking at porn on a computer. Jesus Christ.
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Christ.
B
It's like. This is too. This is too much. This is massive.
A
I watch porn on computers sometimes.
B
I can't believe we used to look at porn on tv. Okay.
A
Oh, like when we used, like a DVD or something. I mean, we'd have a choice. It wasn't on the computer.
B
I used to get on VHS.
A
Yeah, I never. I would. That's what White Boy Stomp was on. I hate what.
B
I hate that.
A
It's called White Boy Stomp. White Boy Stomp.
B
But the thing about. I used to find my uncle's porn or my mom's porn, and then what I had to do is I would you. If it's already in the vcr, you have to write down the timestamp. So you can put it back and rewind it back. If it's not, you just go back to zero. That's ruined my memory.
A
No. What? Rewind back kills me.
B
Oh, girl. Imagine trying to rewind porn while panicking.
A
The phrase rewind back. Rewinding is going backwards. You can't say, I'm rewinding forward.
B
I say, rewind it back, you said. Or maybe rewind back, you said.
A
No, we say, but you know what I meant. I know, but that it just. When I hear people say it kills me.
B
Rewind back.
A
Yes.
B
How often do people say rewind back?
A
I literally did a TikTok video about it the other day. It, like, drove people saying, yeah, I rewind back. Or the other one they say is, what's the other one? People say something like, replay back. There's another one that drives me crazy. I'm like, it's the same thing.
B
There's a few things driving me crazy. But I've had to. I've had to just let it go over time.
A
ATM machine is another one that drives you crazy. No, it doesn't drive me crazy, but that's one people.
B
What is automatic telling Machine, machine.
A
I'm going to rewind back and say, I'm going back.
B
Back. I used to not. I used to drive. I will say this. I. When I was younger and despite. I know I do think about the way you pronounce on this podcast. But outside of this podcast, I typically do not correct people's language. Like, I do not correct people's grammar outside of this podcast. You don't want to do it too?
A
Why?
B
I don't know.
A
It's funny. Why do I get to get. I don't know what's funny, but I.
B
Remember just being in third grade and this guy. I had just moved to lagrange, Georgia, and I might have been in fifth. Sixth grade. Sixth grade in lagrange, Georgia. And this guy, this group of guys tried to, like, gang up on me in the bathroom.
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Ooh. Like a fun gang up.
B
It didn't feel fun at the time. I had these pants that were sweatpants on one side and windbreakers on the other side.
A
Girl, wait, like, inside out or like, oh, okay. Oh, that's different.
B
So I was.
A
I thought you meant the front was windbreaker, the back was crazy inside out.
B
So I was like, this would be so cool. So I went to the bathroom. I would. I kept kind of.
A
This is very bald behavior to show off his pants. I know. You had to go to the bathroom.
B
I don't see if anyone would notice. So every time.
A
So bald. This is so evil.
B
You go to the bathroom. Then I would turn my pants the other way. It'd be like, how does no one know that I keep. I'm wearing different pants. This is crazy. So one of the time I went to go change my pants around, these guys were in there, and they were like, we're going to cause some drama. And then they're trying to intimidate me. And I was like, I'm not into that. I'm not going to let you intimidate me. And then I just. And then someone said, who is you? And I said, who are you? And they said, I'm so. And so I said, no, who is. Who are you? Cause I was like, you didn't try to clown. I'm gonna try to clown you. And then the guy who was trying to bully me at that moment, who. Like, they were literally surrounding me, three of them. And then he looked so hurt.
A
To fight you?
B
Yes, to fight me in the bath. That's what we fight in the bathroom because of. She can't come in there.
A
No, because you were doing the pants.
B
Probably. Cause I was gay. Like, it was probably just that there was a guy named Carlos who.
A
Carlito.
B
Carlos was like the bully. Like a bully from a textbook. Like that kind of bully.
A
Like. Like, I'm gonna give a squirrely.
B
No, he's black. So it was. It was. It was.
A
It was like, yeah, I'm gonna be a swirly, basically. Yeah.
B
But Carlos had also. I mean, I'm assuming Carlos had been held back several times because Carlos looked like a college student. I remember thinking myself, he's too big to be in. To be in. In sixth grade with us. I remember thinking myself, no way this guy's a sixth grader. No way. No way. And I was big. This is coming from me. I was six, two in seventh grade.
A
That's crazy.
B
So, you know, this guy was. Was like. He had a beer. It was too much. So I said, who is. Who are you? And then he. I remember him being like, he. He looked really hurt. And he goes, that's why no one likes you. Because you're all. That's why no one likes you. That's why.
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Damn.
B
And then I walked past and I went back to the class.
A
You struck him over that one.
B
I really did.
A
Our mystical bully was. But I was in love with him. Was Louis Cruz. Why? Louis was so mean to me. But I thought Louis was so hot.
B
What was hot about him?
A
I think his demeanor. Like, he was Cool. And he was the bully. He like walked around. He always had like a fresh pair of Jordans and shit. All like Lewis was like. Lewis was popping.
B
There was a kid named. When I got to Atlanta, my bully's name was George. His last name.
A
Why?
B
Because it seems. It just. I'm not trying to dox George, girl.
A
You know how many Georgia. How many Louis cruises they are.
B
Anyway, George. George was like. I remember one time, like George was. He was a pretty strong guy. He could fight really well. And then one time George like came to my house because we were kind of friends. Like we had a similar friend group. And then. And we had also kind of taken George in. Cause George had kind of like a hard time. Then he stole.
A
Oh, like your family took him in?
B
No, like we not in. But like we. He like we. My mother was like nice to him and like. But then she got mad at him. Cause he stole a magazine from the house one time.
A
Which one?
B
It was just like a. I don't even remember. Maybe like a. I have no clue.
A
Why did he steal a magazine? That seems such a.
B
Because he asked for it and my mom said, no, I haven't read the magazine yet. And he said, okay. And then he put it down on the couch. And then before he left, he checked his backpack for something and he put it on top of the magazine. And they just picked both up and left the house with it.
A
Really similar situation happened to me the other day. A friend came over.
B
I learned it from George.
A
A friend came over and I had this pillow on a chair in my drag room. And then I told him, I was like, hey, I have a gift for your dog. Let's come get him from my drag room. And I gave them the dog bed. And he's like, oh my God, that's so nice of you. And then he put the dog bed on a pillow that he wanted. And then when he picked it up, he. He picked up the pillow and the dog bed and he thought I didn't notice. When we got in the house. I said, oh, dude, I don't think.
B
You didn't notice on the friend's. Look at that.
A
I noticed when he walked out of the drag room. Cuz when I look back to put the light on, I see.
B
I seen you. I thought you said a friend. That was just some. You may. As I go to some random friend. Does that be you? Twice. You fell for it twice.
A
And it's as he walked. As he walked out the drag room and I saw the fil was moving missing. I Was like, this nigga has. And then cuz, also, Bob was holding the. Like this. Walking around the whole time.
B
The dog bed.
A
The dog bed.
B
Sorry.
A
Covering the pillows. And I'm laughing as I go to the house. I was like, bob, I know what you have in your hand.
B
Well, to be fair, that's how I got the pillow the first time. I just threw a sheet over it. I came into your drag lab with a sheet. I put the sheet on top of the pillow.
A
No, it was a dress.
B
A dress. I put the dress on top of the pillow, and then I just picked the dress up and I picked up the pillow. George taught me that. I literally learned that from George. Anyway, George came to the house. He had a gun. Girl. Like, George was on some. This was when we had gone from LaGrange to Atlanta. I remember being like, we're in Atlanta now.
A
And what the gun was to.
B
He was showing us that he had the gun. He was just like. He wanted all of us to know that he had a gun. And we knew. He made it abundantly clear. He was here. He was here to make it clear.
A
That's crazy.
B
That's why I'm not saying George's last name.
A
Yeah, George might show up here.
B
George might be on that new. New shit.
A
Oh, wow.
B
A gun. Girl, that.
A
And how old are y' all at this time?
B
We were probably in maybe 9th or 10th grade.
A
Wow.
B
And I, I. I was not that kind of kid. Yeah, I might. I might. I might fist fight you.
A
Yeah.
B
I'm not going to get into a shootout with you. I remember one time seeing a woman almost get shot and traumatized me.
A
You almost saw someone get shot?
B
Yeah, in that same apartment in the. In. In Cobblestone Flats in Clayton County. The guy across the way dragged his wife out of the house. And we were watching it from the window. Me, my mom, and my brother were all watching from the window. And then he hit her on the head with the gun. And then she was on the ground so heavy. Her hair was all splayed out. I remember her hair was all, like, splayed out.
A
How far away are you watching this?
B
Like, maybe from here to the middle of the drag lab.
A
So let's say that's probably maybe like 25, 50ft.
B
But one. One floor up.
A
50Ft. Okay.
B
And then he points the gun at her. And I remember. And we were in. My mom was. My mom started freaking out. And he was like. And like, I think he jammed the gun maybe. And he was like.
A
Is it ever that serious? Execution style, right in.
B
Right in the middle. Like in the middle. Not in the courtyard, but like between the. Between the apartment buildings.
A
That's crazy. And y' all just watching. What if you looked up?
B
We called the cops.
A
What if you looked up, Would have looked up at y' all next. We were.
B
We weren't. We weren't like, we didn't have the windows open with our heads out the window.
A
We were like, oh, God.
B
You think we were just. We think we out there. Like, like, like pearl. Like Miss Miss Pearl and 227.
A
Well, you said me, my mom and D were watching.
B
I was like, what's her name? I don't know, the old lady from 227. But anyway, it wasn't like that. We. We were like. We were like. We were like watching. Oh, it is Miss Pearl. You thought we liked Miss Pearl from 227? No, girl. We were like, that's crazy. We had called the cops to be like, there's a guy trying to kill his wife out here.
A
That's crazy. Yeah. Guns are such a scary thing, to be honest. Like, it just. But do you know what's scarier? I've always said this, knives are scarier because if you go and stab someone with a knife, that's like. To me, like with a gun, you can pwn it and shoot it and be like, okay, I pull the trigger. Like I did the thing. That's scary. But with a knife, you're taking someone and you are like, have to feel it going into their flesh. You hear those people who stabilize stabbed someone 40 times. I'm like, that means you felt that sensation of like 40 times.
B
That's. That's is.
A
That is crazier to me. Ugh. And the blood, that's happening, girl. So Bob is.
B
If.
A
If you were listening, Bob is stabbing his leg. Well, not literally, but hitting his leg 40 times.
B
That. That is a lot of stabbing.
A
You know like what?
B
That is a lot of stabbing. Let's talk about it. Let's talk. Let'. Actually, let's not talk about this. After the break. Let's move on to something completely different. And if you do not want to ever experience a break, I mean an ad break from us again, please consider joining our patreon. Go to patreon.com type in sibling rivalry podcast. We will be back with a much less disgusting topic.
A
Yes, Coca Cola for the big. For the small, the short and the tall. Peacemakers. Risk takers for the optimists, Pessimists for long distance love. For introverts and extroverts. The thinkers and the doers for old friends and new Coca Cola for everyone. Pick up some Coca Cola at a store near you. Okay, so I've got a ritual now, y'. All. I didn't think that I would be that girl. Although, I mean, I do make protein everything, so I knew I could be that girl. But my mornings lately have gotten busy. Between the darker mornings totally wrecking travel plans and the fact that I basically live off snacks between Halloween and New Year's, girl, it's chaos. But I've been using AG1 to help me stay one scoop ahead of all that. If you haven't heard of AG1, it's a foundational nutrition drink packed with 75 vitamins, minerals, probiotics, superfoods, functional mushrooms, you name it all in one scoop. You just mix it with water, drink it in the morning, and boom. It's like checking off half your to.
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Do list before 9am I love my ag. When we got in the studio and people were fighting over who's gonna get the AG1, honey, I reign supreme. I started using AG1 because, honestly, I got tired of trying to chase my energy with coffee after coffee, Red Bull after Red bull, and taking five different supplements to cover my bases. With AG1 is one scoop once a day, and my gut, immune system, and brain all thank me later. Travel AG1's got me covered with antioxidants, probiotics, and functional mushrooms to keep my system resilient, especially when I'm stuck in breathing recirculated air with 200 different other people. In the darker days, the superfoods and B vitamins and AG1 help keep my energy steady. No crash, no fog. And when I go all in on cookies and pies, you know, this time, it's the most wonderful time of the year. I have no shame. I'm eating, by the way. Kim, I'll see you with their friends. Giving I'm gonna win. It's not a competition, but I'm gonna win. He one gives me a full spectrum of micronutrients from whole foods that help fill in the gaps. Plus, it's got probiotics and enzymes to keep my gut on track even when my diet isn't right there.
A
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B
And we're black.
A
And today we're talking about reading Bomb.
B
Reading is the true art form. No, Shay. What is it?
A
From reading and reading.
B
Reading is the true art form. Yeah. Yeah.
A
This is Dorian Corey.
B
Dorian. I know I said it before. So I'm going to write the Dorian Cory story.
A
Dori Dorian. The Corey.
B
The Dorian Corey story.
A
The Dorian Cory King story. Cory King. Oh, remember, remember Drag Race did before and after Dorian Cory King. That would have been good.
B
What would you wear?
A
A little dress with a cup of ice and mummified.
B
My favorite quote from Dorian Corey has to be, but I don't have to take an arrow and it goes real high.
A
Hooray for you.
B
That is such a great line. If you shoot an arrow and it goes real high, Hooray for you.
A
Mine is. But I don't have to tell you ugly, because you know, you're ugly. Okay. Reading. Okay. I think that I discovered. I mean. Okay, I think you and I both. No, you more than me, though. You came from a family that you didn't read each other. But y' all used to, like, joke like that a lot.
B
We would neg. We would neg each other a lot.
A
I don't know what that word means.
B
Negging. Negging is like picking and making fun of.
A
Okay.
B
Negging.
A
Like we did to some extent. But it sounded like y' all were, like, all into it.
B
Like, no, Justin. Well, okay. So growing up, my brother would call me Christina.
A
Why?
B
Because it's a girl's name.
A
Okay.
B
And my name is Chris.
A
If you like. If you like Christina Aguilera.
B
Christina. There was no Christian. We didn't know about Christianity when I was, like, a kid. Like, when I was, like, five.
A
Okay.
B
So he'd be like, hey, hey, Christine. Like, Christina. That was a very big thing, calling me Christine. So I just called him Justina as a response. I was like, well, if I'm Christina, you're Justina. But he. I would always call him Justine as a response to being called Christina. So it was never just me randomly calling him Justina. It was always, well, then you're Justina. But he called me Christina. For a lot of my childhood. He would also try to scare me a lot. He would always jump out from behind things and try to scare me. And my mother. My mother wasn't really, like, into, like, reading and stuff, but she would pick at you Though, like, she would. My mother was. She would pick at you for sure. Especially later in life. My mother would definitely pick at you.
A
Yeah, my. My immediate family, not so much, but my. My big, like, team Lucia family. We all get together. That is part of the culture. Everyone is like. Everyone is always, like, joking, and there's always jokes flying around all the time. That's a big part of, like, West Indian, like, gatherings.
B
Like, what kind of jokes?
A
Like, I don't know, like, how dark did they get?
B
How deep do they cut?
A
Not. Not that deep. It would be great.
B
Is there an example of one you.
A
Heard it'll be servicing, like, uh, yes, my family did. Jacob just asked. My family makes fun of Andy. They absolutely make fun of Andy's wife. Andy's the only.
B
I think when Jacob ties it, he wants us to ask. Answer the question without asking it. Otherwise, he just asks it with his mouth.
A
Oh, true. Well, yeah, my family does make fun of Andy. Andy is the only white person in our family.
B
But tell me more about the kind of. Like, what kind of. Can you give me an example of what kind of read they would make?
A
Like, he'll be like, oh, look at. Look at. Look at Kev Kevin with my shoes. Maybe, like, my. Like, one of my flip flops was busted. They'll make fun of my busted flip flop or me going back for my fourth round of curry goat. Like, little things like that.
B
So what about a bad haircut?
A
Yeah, yeah, they'll make fun of that.
B
A bad outfit.
A
Yeah, but it would make fun of. Oh, that's why your mama been gone for the. It's not that it's, like, very ceremony.
B
How about, like, if you're fat but.
A
Not in an incendiary fad, not like, look at you, you fat slob, and be like, your belly really getting big there. Button that stuff like that, you know?
B
How about if you're too skinny?
A
Yeah, that too. They call you flecker.
B
Like, that means skinny.
A
Yeah.
B
Any. What about if you're disabled?
A
No. No.
B
Are there any disabled people in your family?
A
There are about three. Three is a people in my family. Like, physically, like, what, Mentally disabled? Yeah, yeah. Mentally and physically. Two mentally, one physically.
B
I have a few cousins with down syndrome. I don't know how we got here. Actually, I do know. I asked the question. My dad and his sisters are mean to each other.
A
Like, mean. Like, cut deep, like, mean.
B
Maybe not mean mean, but when it comes to each other's physical appearance, like, my dad has a gut. He's a pretty big gut, but he's not fat. He just has a big gut.
A
Yeah.
B
And then my aunt, I think he just mentioned to my aunt that she had gained weight. And she's like, rick, I know you're talking with your fat ass. And she was like, chris, look at your fat ass, Daddy. I saw that picture. Your dad looking fat as hell. Yo, like, yo, like. Then they just kept going about how each other were fat. And they're like, your fat ass. Shut your fat ass. I know you ain't talking with your fat big belly ass with that big belly hanging over your pants. That big old belly hanging down to your mid to the middle of your thighs. Fat ass.
A
But is your dad engaged in laughing or he's like, man, that's too mean.
B
Like, no, they're laughing. Okay.
A
Everyone's engaging in laughing.
B
But it's not just like, oh, you have that curry goat. Oh, it's not like, ooh, the belly's growing. It's like with that big ass belly hanging down to your thighs. But they do it to each other. They don't do it to us.
A
They do it to, like, the siblings get each other.
B
Yeah. And it's really just my father, my Aunt Faye, and it's really my aunt Chris and my Aunt Tracy that go back and forth. My aunt. I can't imagine them saying, that's my Aunt Faye. She's the oldest.
A
Got it.
B
I don't think Faye would be interested in that kind of humor.
A
And Aunt Hazel and them do not do that at all.
B
No, no, no.
A
Aunt Hazel's.
B
Oh, my God. Aunt Hazel. Making fun of someone being fat is. She would never work. Aunt Hazel used to be fat.
A
I love Aunt Hazel.
B
She used to be really big, actually.
A
I love Aunt Hazel.
B
No. Could you imagine Aunt Hazel being like, with your fat ass.
A
Does she curse?
B
Yes.
A
Does she?
B
Yes. She curses? Yes.
A
Oh, she doesn't seem like a cursor.
B
But I would see Aunt Hazel. She would not be like, with your fat ass. But if someone upset her, she might. She might call them a fat to other people.
A
That's so interesting, because my experience of yon Hazel. Does she.
B
If. If. If. Well, a fat. I don't know, but she.
A
She.
B
She would have choice words for someone. I don't think she said. No, actually, I'm trying to think hard about this. I don't think Aunt Hazel would say anything about anyone's appearance. No, but she. No, she would not say anything about anyone's appearance.
A
If you ask me, just off of the one that. That me can I spent with Aunt Hazel. In my mind, she has never cursed. She has never. She has like. She is a patron saint.
B
She curses. But I do remember when they were going about the Rapture. I knew there was no rapture. Cause my Aunt Hazel was still here. If there is a rapture, if I'm ever wondering if a rapture's happening, I'm gonna call my Aunt Hazel. And if she's answering the phone, the rapture wasn't real. I know. For that's. If there is really. If there is, the Bible's real. I'm calling Aunt Hazel. And if she answers her phone, the rapture did not happen.
A
So I have a question with that. Your family, obviously you have an uncle that's a pastor, blah, blah, blah, blah. What do they think? Like, did they. Have you spoke to them after the Rapture? Do they think that the rapture happened?
B
They're not on the Internet. They don't. They don't even know. They don't even know that the Internet was saying there was a rapture. Probably.
A
Got it, girl.
B
My family group chat is like, they're still on Facebook. Like, they.
A
They're on.
B
My family's on Facebook still. They are sending memes from Facebook. Like, it's like they send those. Like, my cousin Angela post those pictures of like. Like, thick black women. And then it's like, cook him a meal and he'll never leave. Or it's like, get you a thick girl. That's the kind of like. But like, they're like these, like. Like these, like, cartoon drawings of like. I can't even. That. Yes, this. Yes, this, this. Please make sure you give this.
A
I've seen this one. I thought about. I thought about this.
B
This is the kind of stuff my cousin Angela is always posting in the family chat. Always.
A
I thought about doing this. Doing that picture for New Year's photo shoot this year.
B
That is the kind of. I'm sorry. That is so fucking funny to me. That's the kind of stuff that my family posts in the family. In the family chat.
A
Got it.
B
That's what time we're on.
A
But my friends are different now. So before, not y', all, like. Like, my friends, like, high school friends, college friends, wanted Arcia and stuff. We, like, rag on each other.
B
Specifically Arcia. Arcia is like.
A
She instigates it. RC is an instigator.
B
Rc, you instigate against her, too. Because you don't make it sound like. Don't make it sound like RC is just like, okay.
A
This is the culture she has set. I remind my Own business. Arcea would be like, hi, big boy.
B
With that big biscuit back at yours.
A
Like, she comes at me first, but.
B
I've seen times where you come for her first.
A
It's the precedent that she set.
B
So it's all on her. You just the innocent bystander.
A
Yes.
B
Okay, girl.
A
But that's how all. That's how my friend groups are. Like, we. Like, especially with Dejuan rc And like, we.
B
I don't see that for dejuan. He seems so sweet to me.
A
No, that's crazy. Dejuan is sweet.
B
Yeah, he seems so sweet.
A
Dejaan can be sweet. He can also be very bitter.
B
He's always nice around me.
A
Is he nice to you?
B
He making like. Like he be just, like. Just sweetened and kind.
A
Duan is very classy. Duan's a very classy guy.
B
Is the one. The one you introduced me to years ago?
A
Yes, He talked about this.
B
Can I talk. I can't talk. No, wait. I can't.
A
No, he's.
B
Yes, we can talk about this further.
A
When he's a guest on the podcast.
B
Okay, okay, okay.
A
Excuse me, but. So now, when did. With your friend. You like to rag on people, too, now in your friend group?
B
Yeah, but, like, I'm not like, that.
A
Is 80% of your personality.
B
No, no, I write, but. But I'm like. I'm, like, playing jokes or, like, making fun of things you said or if you make a misstep or. Or if you miss. Oh. If you misspeak in front of me and we're friends. It's a. It's a rap. Like, do not misspeak. I don't care if you mispronounce something. If you. If you said the wrong word, the wrong date. If you say, you know, Christmas, December 24th.
A
Oh. Oh, you're so.
B
I like to. I love to call out my friends for having. If my friends. If one of my friends does something that I perceive as rich behavior.
A
Rich.
B
Rich.
A
Oh, whoa.
B
Hey. Whoa. Look at that. Money.
A
Well, like what? Like what? Like, give me an example.
B
Like, if you. If we're all waiting outside for you to come to the movies and you pull up an Uber Excel.
A
Hey.
B
Oh. If you drink a Suburban. A Suburban. Let me go to your childhood home. Let it have two floors.
A
Ho. And what about the lies you've. The lies you've made up about your friends being rich? Like their parents owning cell phone towers? What about those?
B
I don't know if that's a lie.
A
It is a lie that you've made up.
B
Yeah, we talk about this. Put your hands out.
A
Oh, hey.
B
Why would you cover those up with the head? I love doing that. It's so. It's just to make that note.
A
Oh, you're so silly.
B
I did it with a boss. She said she got her boobs done. I said, where'd you go? She said, beverly Hill. I said, oh, wait a minute.
A
What's the most legendary read that you heard on. During your time on Drag Race?
B
On Drag Race, from my season.
A
Well, I guess you only have one experience.
B
I mean, it was probably Chi Chi Devane saying, you might be from New York City, but those feet are still from Mississippi. That's a pretty good one.
A
That is good. Mine was All Stars 4. When Manila goes to Valentina, she goes, valentina. Did you sew those ties like Selena?
B
The best one I ever saw on the show ever. And I cannot believe you did not say this, because you were there for this one.
A
What?
B
This is. I think this is the best read from Drag Race ever.
A
What?
B
When Jinx Monsoon said, trinity just broke up with her ex, but she wanted to be nice, so she said, let's just be cousins. That was. That floored me. That actually took me down.
A
You know what, Mike?
B
Let's just be cousins.
A
My favorite one is from season two, when jujubee goes untara. Is your barbecue canceled? Cause your grill is fucked. That's what I favorite.
B
Have you ever had a read that you were like, I'm not in on this, and I don't like it and it feels bad.
A
Like, on me. Yeah, maybe, but I can't, like. I genuinely like being made fun of, so I don't really. I'm sure there has been. I can't think. One does not come to mind.
B
I don't mind being made fun of, but I gotta tell you, one time, I was. I got red and I was. Remember being. I just remember being like, I'm sorry. You were there. I remember. I remember being like, when. I'm sorry, I'm about to tell the story. You know? I'm about to tell the whole story. Yeah. I remember being like, I'm sorry, What? So we were at the Queerties, and Mo Hart was hosting.
A
Oh, yeah.
B
And she was, like, talking about people in the room, and the reads were kind of like, Bianca with them big old lashes. Valentina. Oh, she not wearing a mask tonight. And then she was like, it ain't gonna Bob with his big ass belly. Oh, yeah, I remember this. I was like, I'm sorry.
A
I remember this.
B
Like, it feels like. It feels like the other. Yeah, she. She said she's eating for two with her big ass belly. I remember.
A
I remember this.
B
I'm thinking, I don't feel like I know you like this.
A
I remember this.
B
And, like, it feels like because I have a belly and I don't mind being red for my belly, but that just felt so out of pocket when the read's like, valentina, hope you wear it. Oh, she's not wearing a mask tonight. She knows the words tonight.
A
Uh.
B
Oh, Mo Cory King, is your wig gonna stay on all night, Alaska? Watch out. She'll probably give you $10,000 via PayPal. And Bob, with his big ass belly.
A
Eating for two over there.
B
Big fucking gut. Big fat ass belly hanging down to his motherfucking thighs. Big belly, fucking pot belly. I was. And I remember thinking to myself, like, this is so. This is crazy. And I remember even the room was like, oh. Cause I. The real ones are like, what? They were like, oh.
A
You heard it. What did you think we should.
B
What you think? You probably didn't think of nothing about it.
A
I didn't think nothing about it until afterwards I spoke to you. You were like.
B
That was really.
A
You were a gag. I remember you being really gagged. You was like.
B
So I was like, oh, here. Which one of your boyfriends here tonight? That would make me laugh. But, like, fuck it, if you were on stage. You made fun of my belly. Cause I made fun of your belly. I made fun of your whatever, but everything.
A
Yes.
B
And you have as well.
A
I've never made fun of you like that.
B
Okay, so let's tell you more about us, this break. And again, if you don't like these breaks, don't worry. We got you. Go over to Patreon, type in Sibling Rivalry podcast, and you'll be with us right now.
A
Support for this podcast is brought to you by Walden University. Ever catch yourself thinking, what if I could go after what I actually want and really make a difference? You not alone, Boo. And that's exactly why I want to tell you about Walden University. For over 50 years, Walden has helped working adults like you get the W with the knowledge and skills to build the future you want and make a difference where it matters most.
B
If you've been waiting for the right moment, this is it. Head to Waldenu. Edu and take that first step. Walden University Set a course for Change. Certified to operate by Chev. This message is brought to you by our sponsor today. Wald University Set a Course for Change. Want to make real change in your life, career and community at Awal University. They give the support and flexibility to get the w. With online programs designed for working professionals. You'll gain hands on skills to take real world challenges and succeed.
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B
Bob. Thank you. I have a calendar.
A
The girlies are getting sick and I.
B
Think, you know, I've done more winners than you. Four.
A
Just four.
B
Anyway, that's a whole, that's a whole high school career and this time of.
A
Year, you know, you gotta, you gotta schedule time to get your flu shots, your Covid vaccines, all the things and a thing that it can be a real deterrent is scheduling them and getting an appointment with your doctor. And that's why I love, love, love, love love zocdoc because they help you get your appointments. You can find doctors in your area, doctors who take your health insurance, doctors who don't have bad bedside manner. I cannot tell you the amount of doctors I've had with bad bedside manner and it gets on my nerves. And what I like about ZocDoc is that they do patient reviews, y'.
B
All, I'm saying just like rate, rate your professor y'. All.
A
If you want to see people getting and gathering these doctors like Bob will say like y' all go to the ZocDoc patient reviews and see them get in on those girls. And here's your sign to finally book it. And the best part is you don't have to call anyone. You can do it right now while you're listening. Thanks to ZocDoc.
B
I need to bring back the sheen yon saying that was good. Sockdoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment. Nowhere. Callback loops. No. Our next available appointment is six months out. Nonsense. They've got more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty from mental health to dental, primary care to urgent care and everything in between. You can be filter by insurance. Yep, the one you actually have location near where your home is or your work is or your your side piece specialty and even patient ratings so you know who you can trust.
A
Once you find your doctor, you can literally see their calendar book a time that works for you like on the spot. Most appointments are available in just 24 to 72 hours and sometimes the same day. Personally. Well, y', all, I've been using ZOCDOC since. Since zocdoc knew about civil rivalry. I knew about them since about 2017. 16, I've been using Zocdoc. And I will continue. Stop putting off those Zoctor's appointments And go to Zocdoc.comRivalry to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's Z O C-O C.comRivalry Zocdoc.comRivalry R.
B
I V A L R Y.
A
This episode is brought to you by Jack Daniels. Jack Daniels and music are made for each other. They share a rhythm and and the craft of making something timeless while being a part of legendary nights. From backyard jams to sold out arenas, there's a song in every toast. Please drink responsibly. Responsibility.org, jack Daniels and Old no. 7 are registered trademarks. Tennessee whiskey, 40% alcohol by volume. Jack Daniel Distillery, Lynchburg, Tennessee. Okay, Roberta, I have to say, the older you've gotten, you keep on. You talk with your hands more. Have you realized this? I don't know.
B
That's new.
A
Maybe I'm just experiencing more. I just feel like you are doing this a lot. I'm not doing this.
B
Yes, you are. You just did a whole thing.
A
You're like.
B
Anyway, well, listen, if you guys want to come see the talk of my hands, me and Monae will be at the Lil roadie Laugh Riot.
A
Yeah.
B
And Lil Roadie Laugh Riot. Thursday, March 26th at 7:30pm at the Vets in Providence. Honey.
A
Yeah. I have not been to Providence, Rhode island in. I think the last time I was there was at club. Have you ever did Evolution?
B
I think so, yes.
A
With the Jewish queen. With the Annie Rection Lennox, something like that. She was great. Anyway. And now she does. Anyway, anyway.
B
I don't know.
A
She does OnlyFans now and it's nice. I've never looked at it. I just saw her promote it. Yeah, There was this other queen I.
B
Met in Boston who did Onlyfans and.
A
It was Plane Jan.
B
Remember her name. But it was really nice. It was great. She. I can't. I can't remember any, but I remember being like, this is a great. Only fans.
A
But anyway, if you are in Providence, Rhode island, go get tickets to come see us in March, this spring for the little roadie festival. It's going to be really fun.
B
You can go to seethedradqueen.com but if you want to navigate a maze and maybe get.
A
Why do you see? Why do you have to. Why do you have to do all that?
B
Maybe get tickets to market days.
A
Why do you have to be so. Why can't you just. Why do you have to do all that?
B
You rather say it.
A
Why do you have to do all that?
B
Well, go ahead, tell them. Tell them where to go.
A
They can go to monetexchange.com to get their tickets if y' all want to.
B
Do a scavenger hunt to get the ticket.
A
See, this is what I'm talking about.
B
Run back. That Mama Rose Ritz.
A
Not Mama Rose. You called her Mama Rose. Did I?
B
Yes. Oh, she doesn't like being called Miss Ritz.
A
Okay. Just like your mom didn't like being called Miss Martha.
B
She's like, Miss Martha.
A
She likes to not call me no Miss Martha.
B
She didn't want me to call Ms. Caldwell. She didn't like being called Miss Martha.
A
She liked her. Did not like you.
B
She did not like. Like Miss Martha.
A
She like Ms. Caldwell.
B
She didn't mind. She liked Ms. Caldwell.
A
Yeah.
B
Your mother wants to be called Jackie.
A
Yeah, it's Jackie. I guess I gotta be. I mean, I'm not older yet. I feel like whatever people call me, I'll be like, okay, whatever.
B
No reads ever cut you deep.
A
I'm not saying they don't, but I can't think of one that has you.
B
You didn't feel. Okay, I'm not. I'm not making up the More Heart Hour, but you didn't feel one time. You can't.
A
Which one? Which one? Oh, the fact that factory sponges is whack. Okay, can I be very honest about that?
B
It was like Monet. Monet called me. She was like, hot, but, like, not. But you was hot. And when they was like, I'm about to go to Waverly. Not Waverly Wahe Diner. I'm about to get a steak.
A
About a cow.
B
She has a whole plan where she was gonna go to Waihe Diner and get up and drag and then eat the steak and be like, it's not steak. And I said, well, they don't make no extra money.
A
I have to say.
B
I said, it's not that good of reading.
A
I was not able to think about that until. Do you know who made me think it was that bad?
B
Who?
A
Jay and Patty.
B
What were they doing?
A
They were like, girl, she really coming for you.
B
Blah, blah.
A
I was like, is she? And then so they put in my head that it was such a big read. They were instigating. They really instigated the whole thing. I really did not think it was that bad until they jam padded. It was like, no Girl, no.
B
Girl. They was literally, like, I wouldn't let her talk. Oh, they was dealing. Literally.
A
Literally.
B
I remember Monet. I remember, like, Monet, just come over. Let's just watch. Let's just watch a movie or a TV or something. I was like, girls, and you came with a steak. Monet, you were with a steak at the. Steak at my house. And she was trying to set up the camera.
A
I said. I said, baby, let's just. Let's just.
B
Let's just watch a TV show. Oh, my God. That is. Why did that send me so, like, grosses.
A
Is. Is anyone in our friend group that doesn't read that? Like, I think Kennedy.
B
Kennedy.
A
I mean, Kenny's. I mean, Kenny's not a part of friend group, but Kennedy is not, like, you know, around.
B
She's not great at. Whenever she reads, it's just. It's just mean because she's not good at reading. So whenever Kenny tries to read, I'm like, all right, okay. Not. Not too much.
A
Yeah.
B
That's why your ex broke up with you. Like, okay. And she's like, what?
A
And he's a good reader. Tal doesn't seem like he reads.
B
No, Tal reads.
A
Does he?
B
Yeah, no, Tal's good.
A
I haven't witnessed Tal's reading.
B
No, I guess he hasn't read you, but no, Tal reads.
A
He's pretty good. He's pretty good at it. Okay.
B
You know, actually, every once in a while, Taylor has a good read.
A
I would agree. Taylor does, too. Taylor does. Alex is very quiet. Alex is a dormouse.
B
Pep doesn't really read.
A
Pep is not a reader.
B
No, Pep doesn't really read.
A
Yeah.
B
Bianca is nonstop.
A
She can't stop.
B
From the moment she walks in to the moment she's. It's. And honestly. And each one is funnier than the last one. It's like they're just. I. I was watching her and Alyssa Edwards on stage on this cruise, and that was.
A
So they did a show together.
B
So everyone did a show, right? And then they. Then they paired you with certain queens to do a Q and A. So you would just sit down and do like a. Like a talk show style thing. Moderated by the cruise director, Ben.
A
Oh, Ben. I love Ben.
B
Love Ben.
A
I love him. He's so good. He's so funny.
B
Did you know that when you listen to the Wicked album, the voice that goes. Is it true, Ms. Glinda? Is it true she was your friend? That's his voice.
A
The Wicked.
B
The.
A
The movie or the.
B
The. The original Broadway cast?
A
Oh, really? Was he in the show.
B
He was.
A
Yeah.
B
Original Robert Cass. Got it.
A
He was in ensemble obvious. Or was that. Got it.
B
Is it true she was your friend?
A
Really? Yep.
B
Yes. But I love man, that's his, like track 13 or whatever from Bodyguard. That's his version of that.
A
When I see now. Why now? Why you have to read Michelle.
B
It's not a read. That's like. It's like a joke that everyone says. Michelle's always like bodyguard, Track 13 or Track 7 or whatever it is. That's like. That's like a thing she always says.
A
Got it. You see, T.S. madison just had. She had T.S. madison day in. In Atlanta, Georgia.
B
What was that? The city. The mayor.
A
Yeah, she got like the plaque and everything.
B
That's fierce.
A
October 22nd.
B
Maddie has not had a Maddie. Atlanta has not had a white mare since I think like 1960. Can you Google Jacob?
A
1960 and the man I was black.
B
Every mayor has been black since that year. Every single.
A
Wow.
B
Atlanta. Atlanta hasn't had a white mayor in a really long time.
A
Wow.
B
No. 74.
A
Wow.
B
Yeah. Maynard Jackson was the last white mayor of Atlanta. No, it was Sam.
A
Maynard Jackson replaced him.
B
Okay.
A
First black mayor.
B
Sam Massa was the last white.
A
Maynard Jackson is a black ass name. Maynard Jackson.
B
Erico Maynard.
A
Oh, wow.
B
And they started light skin.
A
He is light skinned as hell.
B
They had the Thurgood Marshall that shit before they could Katanji Jackson that shit.
A
Why do you think the reading challenge is such a popular challenge as drag race? Is it because of the lore of how reading is so fundamental in the queer community? Or do you think drag race made reading?
B
Well, roasts are always fun. Fun, right? Roasts are fun. You get. And there's something fun about seeing people telling jokes in good. Like everyone's laughing along now. There are a few times where the reads go far. Like, I remember they were making all those fat jokes. Alexis Michelle and she did not find during the show. Yes. You remember this. It was a whole thing. They were like making fat jokes and.
A
Oh. Because they did a rules for a season.
B
It was just a reading challenge, I think. Oh. And she was like hurt. She was like, Jesus Christ.
A
Okay, so the tour promoter who does the roast. You're so warm.
B
I'm jealous.
A
It's cause I dress warm now. Because y' all be having it too cold in here.
B
It's cold now.
A
I mean, I'm not. Cause I'm wearing a sweater. Are you not cold? You're warm.
B
I feel good, actually.
A
Okay. Murray and Peter. Murray and Peter Murray. He was like monetary I have a question. Do you think the world.
B
That's a good Murray. You sound just like Murray.
A
Do you think the world's ready for another roast? And I was like, I think so. I think that. I think for a while, the promoters were, like, a little crazy scared.
B
They're kind of just like, I'm gagged. That's. I thought he was. If I would have closed my eyes, I would have been like, oh, Murray's here.
A
But I'm like, I think the world is ready for another roast.
B
I think so, too. I mean, I don't think. I think they were ready two years ago. I don't think they were ever not ready. I think people. I think people understand when you go to a roast, you know what the social contract. The social contract is if you're on the stage or if you're in the audience, you are, and you are paying and you're. I mean, you are. You're entering the contract that. I'm into this. Everyone here is cool with this.
A
But I think for a while, because we were like, we were being really respective as societally, we were more aware of different, abled people and bodies and minds and things. So I think even though the social contract of a rose felt like everyone was okay with that, it still felt a little weird to be participating in it. I think that's why people were like, that's why. That's why I think they used to get a lot of blowback from fans. Even though everyone on the stage had agreed to be in it, they were like, this was too much. I did not think it was gonna be that. I think that people were expecting to be more like a reading challenge where it's like, cuz, I mean, the road, the jokes that arose, the rose that I want on Drag Race. I mean, Drag Race on Marie and Peter for the month I was on there until, like, they were vicious. They were vicious jokes.
B
Oh, there were jokes on that show that were vicious. I mean, like, oh, my God, I cannot believe you said that. Jokes on the show. 100%. But that's what it was about. That was the point.
A
And I would. I mean, I would definitely do another roasted show. It's so fun.
B
Maybe we'd do it for our 40th birthday.
A
We talked about this on the podcast. Drinking rose for our 40th birthday. When is your.
B
Our 40th birthday? When we both turned six years apart.
A
I know. When we both turned 46 years.
B
Four years apart.
A
Four years apart. You never know.
B
I do know.
A
I just said this is your middle five.
B
I just said not six. Four.
A
Let's meet at five.
B
I know you were born in 1990, bitch.
A
I know you were born in 1986, you old bitch.
B
Not much older. Yeah, older than older. It's a housewife quote. Oh, not much. We can you older than my oldest brother.
A
I just met Bronwyn from Housewives of Salt Lake City. She is. It's the new season of Housewives. Everyone is like, you have to watch.
B
They're all Mormons.
A
No.
B
Any of the Mormons.
A
I don't know. I don't watch it. Oh, there's one housewife who.
B
So her grandmother is really rich or married a really rich man in. Her grandmother is willing. She requested that her granddaughter marry her new husband. So one of the housewives. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Back it up.
A
The woman married her grandfather's spouse.
B
Her step grandfather.
A
Yeah, her step grandfather. She married him when her grandmother died.
B
So why?
A
Because her grandmother requested it.
B
They fucked.
A
What do you mean? You think they're humble playing combio?
B
Maybe it was like a lavender marriage, but not really.
A
No, they.
B
I would have done a lavender marriage back in the day.
A
That's when you marry a straight person.
B
No, that's when usually a lesbian marries a gay guy.
A
Huh. Just cause. So you guys are just married platonically.
B
I would have done a lavender marriage for sure. Would you have done one?
A
I don't know.
B
The sixties?
A
I don't know. I don't know.
B
Do you know I would have done 11 in marriage. One hundo p. Yeah, yeah.
A
Would you so. But no sex ever.
B
I would have sex with.
A
Right. I'm not. I'm not pansexual, though. So that's why I don't think it'll work for me.
B
But also, we don't have to have sex. I like it in a sexual way, but I would have done love in a marriage just. Just for the social construct to, like, protect ourselves and so that we can have social lives and have benefits and stuff. I would do it for that. But we don't have to if we're not attracted to each other. No, we don't have sex.
A
No. I guess I would have. Maybe I have to see the person.
B
Would you marry?
A
I do have lesbians. I love lesbians.
B
Would you marry someone so they get their green card? Yeah.
A
Depending on who it is. Yeah.
B
You know, they pay.
A
It's not even about the money. If it's a friend and I want them to.
B
You would do it for free?
A
If it's a friend of mine. Why not? Why not?
B
Because marriage is expensive.
A
Is it?
B
Yes.
A
How expensive than marriage? No, I mean if you're doing a whole sale, like if you're just going down to the courthouse, you'd probably pay a few hundred dollars.
B
Well, do you want it to look real?
A
I mean, but not everyone goes. Not everyone has the budget or the money to do a big old wedding.
B
You can do a small ol wedding.
A
But not everyone has the budget or the money to do a small wedding. Bitch, weddings are expensive.
B
In my.
A
The word wedding on something, you know, venues immediately they're charging more money.
B
I'll do a backyard wedding.
A
I don't know. Oh God, don't.
B
I can't. I'm gonna get married in your backyard.
A
I would do that.
B
Cover the pool.
A
Woo. Don't know the pool.
B
What would you put? This would be huge. What giant piece of wood would be.
A
People cover pools for gathering their gatherings all the time.
B
Maybe there's companies that do it.
A
Yeah, I'm sure.
B
Where could you keep that besides on top of the pool?
A
I mean, probably it's one that rolls me because you know those planks that kind of roll. Something like that.
B
Get married on the pool. You should get married in your backyard.
A
No, you save a lot of money, girl. We're already looking at. At small case scenario. This is like the least amount of people. We, we, we could invite 200 people.
B
Oh, hey.
A
So that's why I might, we might just.
B
Why do you need to invite 200 people?
A
Because just family alone that has to be invited and friends. That's what you have that big of a family? I have at least minimal in my family. Minimally people in my family, 35 to 40, they have to come and they.
B
All get a plus one. But some of them are the plus ones.
A
Right?
B
There's married people.
A
Yeah, there's altogether 35.
B
So how are we getting it now? Let's say.
A
And now friends, close friends.
B
But he doesn't have. Andy has no siblings.
A
But Andy has extended family. That has to come.
B
He has few uncles and aunts.
A
He has three.
B
That's not many. Bitch. I have 14.
A
That's crazy.
B
I have 14 uncles and aunts. Three is literally nothing. Literally. Girl, if I, if I was doing just my family. Solamente family. Okay. I have seven living uncles and aunts. On my mom's side, the seven. No, I have five. Five including my dad. On my dad's side I have 12. I have. My grandmother has one sister alive 13. And then all of their children. So now we're looking at somewhere in the 60. And then some of. Then their children have children.
A
So how do you decide who you're cutting? Are you inviting all these people? No, no, no, no, no, no.
B
God, no.
A
So who's coming?
B
Mount Hazel, Mount Lisa, Amanda, Angela, Justin, Uncle Scotty. Uncle Ray can come. Scooter can come. I don't think he will, but he's invited all of my father's sisters can come. My father.
A
So roughly, that's how many you think you record if you have to invite.
B
And then Amanda's. Amanda and Angela's kids. Amanda, Angela and Ashley.
A
No children. How old are kids, Amanda?
B
They're college age.
A
Okay.
B
Except for some are like the theme. Youngest is like maybe like 13.
A
If you're in high school or younger, you're not coming.
B
No, there's no babies. There's no Google. Except. No, there's no Google guy. Guys. Like, some of them are adults.
A
Okay.
B
Like my avant, the one that called you the bear. A Bearilla. He's like 22 now.
A
The Bearilla.
B
He's hairy. He couldn't believe Jake was so hairy, so they called him a bearilla. So, I mean, they're okay. So Amanda, Angela and Ashley have a lot of kids. Justin has one kid. Bentley has no kids. Andy has two kids. I mean. I mean, I don't know. It's a lot of people. Yeah, but the. Oh, oh, Bentley can come. Andy can come.
A
I would want to do a roast.
B
And Deborah can come.
A
I want to do a roast.
B
Her daughter can come.
A
A roast at my wedding. Instead of, like, the toasts, it being a roast.
B
But do we have to be sweet, though?
A
No.
B
How gutter can we get?
A
I mean, my grandmother's there, so you can't be talking about slobbing, sucking dicks. You do. Gobbling demon.
B
Your grandma has YouTube. She's seen rotation. My grandma's monae would me play rotation.
A
In front of her family because that's inappropriate.
B
Or my family.
A
That's inappropriate.
B
So no one's family can watch rotation? No one's family.
A
No, not.
B
There were no children there. There were no. There was all adults play when I'm not there. Can I say to my family group chat now?
A
Can I?
B
You say play. You're not there.
A
It's no.
B
So who's allowed to watch rotation? No one. No one you're related to is allowed to watch rotation.
A
Anyone who can find it on YouTube, they can watch it. Not when.
B
So is anyone I'm related to a lot of.
A
To watch rotation when I'm not present.
B
No, you're not going to be there when they.
A
They're all.
B
They're not even all present. They're all in their individual homes.
A
They would have found it on their own already.
B
Mon. Hazel's already saying it.
A
Did she?
B
Of course. She watches everything you do. No, I'm not kidding, Mon. Hazel is a big fan. She watches everything you do. Aunt Hazel. Oh, God.
A
Do you know what she thought about it?
B
She pro. I don't think she told me, but she probably just like, ooh, that was something. It was probably something like that. Ooh, she was up there.
A
So I want to do. So instead of, like, the toast.
B
Oh, my God. You should do a video with you and Jackie reviewing rotation together. That would go so viral. Do you think she could do a Riverside link?
A
No.
B
You don't have nobody in St. Lucia. They can set up a camera.
A
I want to do ancient person. She wants to come back up here, I'm probably going to bring her.
B
Don't.
A
What?
B
Roll your eyes.
A
Bring up here for a few weeks. My mom is wild, as in calling you to bring her alcohol. My sober friend, I brought you alcohol. Yeah. No. When did you bring me. When have you ever brought me alcohol?
B
I've handed alcohol to you.
A
When?
B
At some point.
A
When?
B
And you telling me in 15 years, do you think I've ever handed you alcohol? To quote you, I will give it.
A
Till the end of time to find a time where he brought me alcohol.
B
And handed you alcohol before.
A
Wait, tell me.
B
Have we broke over to Molly's house before?
A
Yeah, I'm sure. Who wants us to take Dicko's word over for it?
B
Well, Mikey brought over some. Some. Some. Mikey.
A
Y' all are not a unit.
B
No.
A
And Mikey, let me tell you something. That lick that Mikey brought, Mikey finished it before he left, too. He ain't leaving behind. He ain't leaving for me.
B
Mikey need to be getting turned.
A
He's so small. Where does he fit all of it?
B
Mikey be like shots. Mikey like, Jesus, you're crazy for that. He's able to defend himself. You're crazy for that.
A
So I want to do a roll to my toes. Is that kind?
B
I think it is. Okay. How. Okay, so we just not sexual, but anything else?
A
Yeah, anything else? Just not sexy.
B
Monet, don't.
A
Anything else is not sexual.
B
So I can make a joke about Cleopatra getting ate up?
A
Yeah. Okay.
B
Jackie's not gonna start crying. You don't even know no. Cleopatra ate your cat.
A
Right?
B
So your mom's not gonna. Jackie not gonna start crying.
A
She wanted that cat to be gone. She was probably I think she. She lucky. She lucky she let there.
B
But can we talk about your brother being a cop?
A
Yeah.
B
Like, oh, DeShawn, don't arrest nobody.
A
I was about to say now, when.
B
He flexed that pistol, I'm like, sean, I don't. Sean gonna be there?
A
Yeah, Yeah, I think he'll come.
B
Can we make fun of Andy?
A
I would love to.
B
Can we make fun of your family too, though? Yeah. Can we make fun of Andy's family?
A
I don't know. That's a question for Andy. Okay. But here's the thing.
B
Can I make fun of how his niece got her phone snatched in Brazil? Yes. Can I make fun of that whole trip?
A
Yeah.
B
Can you play? Can we play. Can I play rotation at my wedding?
A
No, you cannot play rotation at my wedding.
B
I'm gonna have an iPad.
A
Like, if I can Teletubby, I'll wrap.
B
You up and just walk around and be like, hey, everyone. Hi. Oh, good, Grandma. It's good to see you again. Now, who is this? Oh, I didn't meet this last time. Ooh. Hey, you're not allowing any children.
A
No, I don't.
B
What's the age?
A
Cut off if you are under. If you're below 10th grade, you can not come.
B
Okay.
A
Get a babysitter.
B
So Nevaeh can come.
A
Yeah, Nevaeh is. And she, like, almost in college.
B
Nevaeh's like 16, 17.
A
Yeah, she brought. Going to college soon.
B
Have you met? You remember Navea?
A
I'm. I met. Yes, I did. At your mom's funeral.
B
N didn't.
A
She was there for like a hot minute. Did Navea go? She did. Oh, yeah, she did. I met her there.
B
She's tall now. Tall. I've been tall to you. But you. That's to you. That's how you met her. So you. She doesn't seem tall to you, but she's tall.
A
All work.
B
Shockingly so.
A
Yeah. Well, how kids sprout. I mean, how kids sprout up just m. It's kind of crazy how we grow like that, right? Growing. Yeah, I reckon growing is crazy. Grow spurts.
B
Well, the truth is, allegedly, you do half your growing vertical. Growing between one and three. When you're three or half height, you're going to be really roughly.
A
Huh?
B
I mean, it's not fifth grade. My God, if you doubled from fifth grade, you'd be a monster. A monster.
A
Do you know what I thought about? What? Doing the wedding in drag.
B
You do not want to do that.
A
Oh, he's so kind. I'll be such a beautiful bride.
B
Maybe just do two. Do like, do like a, like a nightlife wedding.
A
No, that's too much.
B
And what are you doing here in la?
A
Would I do it here or in la?
B
I said here in la.
A
Yeah, I'm gonna do it in New York.
B
New York.
A
The weather, like we said, 20 variables. Go indoors.
B
What are you gonna do outdoors?
A
I want outdoors. Yeah, I think we're doing an outdoor indoor situation. But like, I think like a. Like a sickening like ride or gown. I'll tell you who's not making it. Who? Your friend.
B
Who? The one who makes the outfits.
A
Yes. I have to tell you about that, by the way, I'm so gagged.
B
I always tell people, guys gag. If you want to get an A wedding dress, just have one made custom by a local dressmaker. It will be cheaper and more unique than going to a wedding dress store and buying one of those overpriced ass dresses.
A
Yeah, I mean, yeah. Or honestly, Goodoria would probably make a beautiful wedding gown.
B
So you said this is your ideal dress one time. Is that still true?
A
I mean, for the time. This is very. This is very of an era. This is very like, like 2000s, like that, like early aughts, like late 90s. This is nothing I would do. Now.
B
Do you want your dress to be timeless or do you want your dress to reflect the time you got married? I think there's something.
A
I want it to reflect the time I got married.
B
Yeah. I think there's something really interesting about your dress reflecting the time you are married for.
A
Sure. Like you look at 80s wedding dresses, like. Yeah, I agree. So I want it to look very of the 2000s, I gotta say, after.
B
The 90s and maybe the early 2000s. I don't see any of these fashions being indicative of the time that we're in.
A
So you're saying look like if you.
B
See them from the 60s, boom, 70s boom, 80s, boom, 90s boom, around 2000s, it's getting real ambiguous.
A
No. 2000s, yes. I think 2010s. Maybe this has enough time hasn't passed to distinguish itself yet.
B
Someone said that what it is is our access to media is causing fash to change so quickly. It can't last a decade because of.
A
This, because of socials, we have so much access to all like different fashion. We just can't stick to one thing basically.
B
Yeah.
A
Or we keep on going back. Like kids dressing. Like there's a whole like 70s movement with like a lot of like flare jeans and like guys wearing crop tops. Like it feels very indicative of the 70s?
B
What are the crop tops of the 80s? Men in crop tops. Is it the 80s?
A
I thought that was 70s.
B
They're probably doing the 70s too. But in my head it's very 80s.
A
In my head when I think of 70s, I think of bell bottom, corduroy, high waisted flare pants with an afro and like a crop toppy tight like cap sleeve situation.
B
You ever taken a read too far. You ever take a read? You were like, I shouldn't have done that.
A
I'm sure I have.
B
What's up with your memory, bro?
A
My memory's bad, bro.
B
You can't think of one read that's gone too far ever. You can never think of anyone. You can't think of a time anyone's ever hurt your feelings.
A
But the read. You brought the Monique Heart one. Yeah, but Moart, how dare you. Whatever. Monique Heart.
B
Whatever.
A
What are you going to do about it?
B
I'm not going to do anything.
A
Okay.
B
Exactly what is my heart going to do to you?
A
You remember me? How she gathered you up on Twitter. Tik Tok the other day.
B
She has going to gather you.
A
How's it gathered you up on Tik Tok? She.
B
You.
A
You. You're harsh, Nemesis.
B
I didn't get gathered on Tik Tok.
A
She didn't gather you.
B
She mentioned you and me. And first of all, neither of us was gathered.
A
Let's be clear.
B
That's like them girls gathering those little ponytails.
A
That ain't nothing there.
B
A lack of gathering as it were. A smattering.
A
Magic. The Gathering.
B
Magic. The Gathering.
A
Should we start playing Magic? The Gathering. Bosco had Irene play it.
B
I'm open to it.
A
It's just. It's like a card game. Like Pokemon. I thought it was more like a dungeon. I thought it was more like Dungeons and Dragons.
B
No, it's close. I think it's closer to Yu Gi.
A
Oh, I mean Yu Gi. Oh, and Pokemon are very similar.
B
Are they?
A
Yeah.
B
I never played Pokemon.
A
Yeah, you told me this. Yeah.
B
So I feel like when you're playing Pokemon, talk me through it. Talk me through playing Pokemon.
A
Well, like you put down your Charizard, right? Charizard has an attack and a defense.
B
Okay, now I put down Pokemon. Pikachu. You know Black Ball is called Pikachu.
A
Pokemon.
B
That's Pokemon. Hey, Pokemon.
A
Well, black people love hate calling characters by the government name.
B
What's his name? Pokemon.
A
You'll be like Brain Brave.
B
Frozen.
A
Come on, Brave. Get a brave. Her name is Mirabon.
B
Get it frozen. Get it frozen. Okay, so I put My card.
A
So what are the.
B
The number. There's numbers that represent something, right?
A
Yeah. There's an attack and defense. Right, Jacob? And then so if my Charizard has 1200 attack and yours has a. Sorry, that's Yu Gi oh.
B
Pokemon has health and attack.
A
HP and attack.
B
Yeah.
A
And then. So if my attack is 300 and your HP is 200, when I attack you, you're. You're dead because I took all of your. All of your hp.
B
Can I have your card now?
A
No. Your card just burns. It goes back into your deck.
B
You just take it back. No, it goes into your discard.
A
No, your eye. Mine stays up. Yours goes into your discard.
B
You don't trade. You don't. You don't take the cards from the loser. No.
A
Cuz I killed you. No, you don't. Do I just take it forever?
B
Yeah. No. Then why they call trading cards?
A
Cuz you. I. We. If just not in the game, I want to trade a card that you have. We trade like that. Not in the game.
B
Now the stakes are too low. I went the blue ass white dress dragon.
A
That's Yu Gi oh.
B
That's not Pokemon. I know that. I know that.
A
I don't think you did know that.
B
I absolutely knew that. 100% knew that. I know Yu Gi oh. I don't know Pokemon though. But I want that blue ass white dragon. I want to find a way to get that blue ass white dragon.
A
I want. I want the dark magician. Oh my gosh. Should we get into Yu Gi oh. Start playing Yu Gi oh.
B
I mean I used to play Yu Gi oh a little bit. I was not good at it. I was never good. And I didn't have enough money to have many cards, so I had one deck and I. I felt like someone took my cards. I feel like I played in someone. We played for keeps.
A
Jordan.
B
George. George. Oh, George. I gotta tell you. So the reason why. The reason why I was thinking about George is because George was actually really hot. When you mentioned your hot hot George was.
A
They hated that.
B
They loved it.
A
Just like when you were smacking the gum.
B
Ludicrous. I know.
A
The comments were like Bob, no, this is not.
B
I know you're not talking.
A
When was I. I've never smacked them on this. On this podcast.
B
You smacked on the pod Monday. The whole first season.
A
I said gum the first season. Let it go, Elsa. Let it the go.
B
What if it's still affecting me?
A
That's your problem. Then you need to know how to move on. Before you go.
B
I want to tell you something.
A
What?
B
And this is something that everyone's been reacting crazy to. And I want to see your reaction to this.
A
What?
B
Because everyone's acting really wild about this. I swallow all of my gum. Every bit of gum I have ever chewed. For 39 years, I've swallowed every piece of gum and I chew a lot of gum.
A
That's fucking disgusting.
B
Why is it disgusting? What makes it disgusting?
A
Because you know. Do you know what gum does when you're inside? Di. Why they should.
B
Nothing.
A
It does nothing. It causes disruption in your. Look at. Look at what?
B
I'm living proof. I swallow.
A
And you think you're functioning?
B
Yes, yes. Yes. There's no blockage. I'm very regular. Three times a day.
A
You. You should.
B
Two to Three times a day.
A
You shit three times a day?
B
Two to three times a day.
A
And there's. There's ample waste there.
B
Yeah. There's no little. It's not going to have pebbles. I take three, two to three healthy shits every day. How often do you shit?
A
Twice a day.
B
So how come you can believe it for you, but you can't believe it for me?
A
Because I'm incredibly healthy.
B
I'm also healthy.
A
I don't swallow my gum.
B
But it doesn't do anything to your digestive system. It does nothing.
A
Jared, can you look at what gum does to your digestive system?
B
And what are you gonna do when it says nothing?
A
What am I gonna do? Yeah. Nothing. There's not a wager or award.
B
Will you admit you're wrong?
A
Whoa.
B
Can you at least admit you're wrong?
A
I'll say I'm wrong.
B
Maybe you apologize to me.
A
Chewing gum is not. Wait, what did you search?
B
Is it digested?
A
Oh, chewing gum is not digested by human body. It is composed of an indigestible base material typically made from synthetic rubber or resin, along with flavoring sweeteners and softeners.
B
Myths of the seven Year Digestion. The commonly misconception that chewing gum takes seven years. While chewing gum is generally. Is. Whilst chewing gum is generally harmless, excessive chewing or swallowing of large amounts of gum can potentially cause constipation. Never has abdominal discomfort. Never had. You've had that.
A
You've had. You've had abdominal discomfort.
B
I've had a. But it wasn't from chewing gum.
A
We don't know. You're assuming.
B
And you had it too, some of yours from not chewing gum?
A
No, I've never had that. Just as a gum.
B
You've never had abdominal. You've never had a. You've never had any Kind of a stomachache from gas. You don't know that.
A
I know.
B
It could be from not chewing gum.
A
You know. You know when you have, like, a really bad gas or you have a migraine, don't you wish you had, like.
B
I don't have that connection.
A
An X ray. Not the same thing. But, like, if you had a really bad headache or you've had, like, a really bad gas, don't you wish you had, like, in the Jetsons, like, a thing that could just go over your body so you can see exactly what it is?
B
They have a Solvos.
A
No, like an X ray thing.
B
They have those. They're called X ray.
A
No, but like in the Jetsons, it's something like. You can pick up here and be like. You know what I mean? Like that. Like, I wish I had that in my life.
B
You could go get one.
A
Do you think in our lifetime we will experience teleportation travel?
B
I don't think you want to. I think you'll come on the other side as a monster. I think you will come on the other side. Mangled, bangled, spangled and spaghetti.
A
But the idea that we can go from here to New York, New York, in the Blip Girl.
B
The other day I ordered something from Amazon. I was watching a video about. About the Black Death.
A
That was that thing that happened in Europe, in Messina.
B
Yeah. And everyone got the Black Death.
A
Yeah.
B
And it was an ancient. But I would think about people living in ancient Greece or whatever, and I was thinking myself, no one's ever lived in Ancient Greece.
A
What?
B
No one's ever lived in ancient Greece. It wasn't. It was just Greece. It was ultra modern, super, like, the peak of technology. So when they weren't thinking, girl, we're living in the ancient times. They were like, technology has never been this advanced. They were like, no one's ever known as much as we know right now. You think you're living in this super.
A
Duper present like us right now.
B
Yeah. But in 2,000 years, I'm like, can you put the Ancients?
A
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
B
But like, they were like. We think of like. For example, there was a time where it probably took a piece of mail two weeks to get from New York to la. And people were thinking, can you believe it only takes two weeks?
A
Yeah.
B
Can you believe only two weeks for Priority Mail? Holy shit.
A
I know. In like 100.
B
I mean.
A
But the thing is that. Have you seen that? Oh, my God. This brings me to a whole nother conversation.
B
We'll talk about it on the next.
A
Episode on the next episode.
B
Bye off.
A
Bye. And Doug, here we have the limu emu in its natural habitat helping people.
B
Customize their car insurance and save hundreds with liberty mutual.
A
Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug. Uh, limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us? Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you need@liberty mutual.com Liberty Liberty Liberty Liberty savings ferry underwritten by liberty mutual insurance company and affiliates excludes massachusetts. The holidays mean more travel, more shopping, more time online and more personal info in more places that could expose you more to identity theft. But lifelock monitors millions of data points per second. If your identity is stolen, our u. S Based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed your money back. Don't face drained accounts, fraudulent loans or financial losses alone. Get more holiday fun and less holiday worry with lifelock. Save up to 40% your first year. Visit lifelock.com podcast terms apply.
Release date: December 1, 2025
Hosts: Monét X Change & Bob The Drag Queen
This episode dives into the art of "reading"—the witty, sometimes biting tradition of throwing shade and playful insults, particularly within the queer and drag cultures. Monét and Bob reminisce about their families, personal reading styles, legendary Drag Race moments, and how humor can cut close to the bone. They also touch on roasts, wedding plans, and whether reading ever goes too far, all with their signature unfiltered, hilarious banter.
Bob: "If you shoot an arrow and it goes real high, hooray for you." ([20:54])
Monét: “Your belly really getting big there. Button…” ([23:49])
Bob: “But is your dad engaged in laughing or he's like, man, that's too mean?...No, they're laughing.” ([25:09])
Bob: “When Jinkx Monsoon said, ‘Trinity just broke up with her ex, but she wanted to be nice so she said, "Let’s just be cousins."’ That floored me.” ([32:10])
Bob: “It ain’t gonna Bob with his big ass belly…It feels like the other reads were light, and then it got really real for me.” ([33:33])
Bob: "My dad and his sisters are mean to each other...when it comes to each other's physical appearance, like...they just kept going about how each other were fat—and they're laughing." ([24:28-25:13])
Monét: “My family does make fun of Andy. Andy is the only white person in our family.” ([23:00])
Bob: “Chi Chi Devayne saying, ‘You might be from New York City, but those feet are still from Mississippi.’ That’s a pretty good one.” ([31:40])
Monét: “Is your barbecue canceled? Cause your grill is fucked.” ([32:23])
Bob: “Mo Heart...She was like, ‘Bob with his big ass belly’...it felt so out of pocket...the real ones were like, ‘What?’” ([33:33])
Monét: “I genuinely like being made fun of...I can’t think of one read that’s ever cut me deep.” ([41:29])
Bob: “When you go to a roast, you know the social contract—if you’re on stage or in the audience, you’re up for it.” ([48:06])
Monét: “...societally, we were more aware...it still felt a little weird to be participating in it.” ([48:06])
Bob: “I swallow all my gum. Every bit of gum I have ever chewed. For 39 years.” ([67:31])
Monét: “That’s fucking disgusting.” ([67:46])
Fun, riotously candid, affectionate, with biting but loving humor and moments of sincere reflection. Both hosts use storytelling to both entertain and illuminate deeper issues of self-esteem, belonging, and the power of language.
This episode is a masterclass in how humor, “reading,” and affection intersect in queer communities and chosen families. Bob and Monét’s chemistry is on full display as they dissect the history and value of reading, swap legendary Drag Race moments, and reveal when jokes go sour. Whether they’re discussing family, wedding party seating charts, or the importance of letting shade stay playful, this is Sibling Rivalry at its most engaging, insightful, and laugh-out-loud funny.