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Simple Farmhouse Life
234. Don’t Overcomplicate Your Home Decor | Myquillyn Smith, The Nester
00:47:29
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- [00:00]
A
Warning. If you're using a sportsbook to bet on the finals, you're getting robbed. Delete that app and join the millions using polymarket. Polymarket is a prediction market, not a sportsbook. You trade against other fans, not the house. That means more money for you and less for greedy sportsbooks. It's available in all 50 states. Polymarket your go to prediction market for basketball's biggest stage. Download Poly Market in the App Store and use Promo Code block to unlock $50 free for your first trade. Download and use Code Block Trading. Not available in all jurisdictions. Check local regulations before trading restrictions and eligibility requirements apply. I am so grateful when I made decorating mistakes that instead of just like crying and hating myself for it, I said, okay, well what I learned well, guess what I learned? That I'm kind of a neutral girl. Or guess what I learned? That I like a sofa that is a timeless shape and it really helped me from for the rest of my life. If I looked at it as what can I learn from it helped me to be able to move forward.
- [00:56]
B
My name is Lisa, mother of eight and creator of the blog and YouTube channel Farmhouse on Boone. Join me as I share with you my love for creating a handmade home from scratch, cooking, and a little mom and entrepreneur life along the way. Welcome back to the Simple Farmhouse Life podcast. Today we are talking with Mikalin from the Nester, all about home decor, simplifying your home decor, how to make decisions without being super paralyzed by all of the different options out there. With a certain level of confidence that we can enjoy our homes, love our homes, even if we aren't interior designers, even if we feel like we aren't skilled in that way. I think that you're going to really find this episode very encouraging. Well, thank you so much, Mikwin for joining us. I'm so excited to hear about your book, your new book, your podcast. We're going to talk about about decorating our home, creating beauty in our home and making those decisions with confidence. This even though I feel like I've been at this for 16 years, making a home, trying to make my home beautiful on a budget with lots of DIY projects, you know, some old, some new. Still, there are those moments where I feel like I'm too nervous to invest in something, thinking, will this work? This could be another thing that ends up in the Goodwill pile. So. So anyways, I think that we can all relate to this. So yeah, tell us first a little bit about yourself, your book, your podcast, or whatever else you want to share.
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A
Oh well, thank you. Thanks for having me here today. I just love what you do and the hospitality that you create on the Internet. And I've been online talking about home for 17 years. I see the world through house colored glasses, honestly. And I just love all things home. We have my husband. I have been married 30 years. We've moved 15 times. So this is our 15th home that we're in right now. We have three boys who are grown, but our oldest two just moved back when we moved here a year and a half ago so they could start a business together. So they're at home. And our youngest is in college, so he'll be home for the summer and then moving out. So it kind of feels like old times to have all of our three boys under one roof, which I love. But I believe that every home has a silver lining. I love talking about home hospitality imperfection, and I just have yet to tire of it. So I have a podcast, I have a private community. I talk about home on Instagram. Just can't get enough.
- [03:32]
B
Yeah, you're one of the original home people here on the Internet, one of the original home bloggers. I remember your name like the Nestor. I have heard of that for so many years. So, yeah, that makes sense. Now that you've been doing this for 17 years, what's the story with moving 15 times? Is there a reason? Was it jobs or what's.
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A
I wish there was. Like, really cool, great story about it. Like, we're in the military. My husband is an entrepreneur and he's a visionary. And, you know, we got married and then he finished school and I finished school, and then he got a job. And, you know, when we would move to a new area, we would always rent first because we did get burnt once, like, oh, let's move to a new area and buy a house. Regretted that. That was a big learning, learning process there. So when. When we move, we now rent, and then from there we will, you know, decide to purchase. But, yeah, it seems like a lot. I do have a long. I have a hard time remembering my zip code at times, but I'll tell you, at the time, I cursed it. Like, I hated having to move so much, but now with what I do, it was just the best design school I could have asked for. It was a really good education in setting up home quickly. Yeah.
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B
And there are so many different scenarios with every house, whether it's where it's located, whether it's in the city or the country. If it's old, if it's new, there's all these unique challenges, but then also unique ways that it's better. You've probably have you had every kind of home I'm possibly could describe at this point.
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A
You know, I'm sure we haven't, but you're exactly right. Like, I think we sometimes think that setting up a house is just. It's just what I like in my personal style or, you know, our family style, but not. It's your style. Plus, the house gets a say whether we want to admit it or not. Like, I think you live in a Victoria now. We live in a Victoria now. And she's kind of bossy. You know, she has her own way in the stuff that worked in my 1980s farmhouse. A lot of it works here, but some of it doesn't. And I now think that's the fun part. Kind of like getting to know the house and together figuring out our style and what works best in the house.
- [05:44]
B
Yeah, I found that out. So we've already been here for five years, but I found that out whenever we moved from our 1920s Craftsman to our 1860s Victorian. I thought, okay, well, I've already figured out what I like. I already bought all the stuff, did all the, you know, colors, and I figured out the kind of furniture I like. We're just going to put this into this house, and then it's going to be done. Like, we're going to move in and it's going to be done. And I realized really quickly that it did not go at all. And I still am figuring it out. Like, I still feel like I don't really totally know. But with moving so much, do you feel like you come into a new house with a sense of confidence? Like, okay, I know just what needs to go in here. I can set this home up and it could look nice. And it's not this, like five, 10 year. I mean, you don't have five or 10 years. Like, you have to get it comfortable in a very short amount of time.
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A
I had to earn the confidence. But I will tell you, when I move, what I do have is a sense of purpose and a mission, because I have had times where we moved into a house and. And we've been there for nine months, and I still have art stacked behind the sofa and colors taped to the wall or, you know, it's a rental and I just don't have quite things unpacked yet. And guess what? We're going to be moving in three more months. And it was after a couple times of that, and I'm like, oh, My gosh, my kids childhood is just transient. Why am I not? Why am I keep waiting on my next house? So definitely moving a lot has taught me just to go ahead and set it up, to go ahead and figure it out. Like put the art, make the nail hole, whatever it is, just try something to get movement and to see progress. And I'm really grateful for that.
- [07:16]
B
Yeah. Because you don't always want to feel like you're in a temporary situation. Like you want to feel like you're just living your life in your comfort zone, not like you're always in transition to the next thing. And I, I kind of understand that feeling. Even though we've only lived in two houses, but whenever you get your mindset on something else, it's like, okay, well now it's that even though it's years before we're going to end up in that. So what are some of the things that you do right away when you get into a new home? I feel like you're very qualified for this. Since you said you've moved so many times. You're obviously an expert in setting up a home to make it quickly feel like home, a comfortable place, even if it's like fast.
- [07:57]
A
A couple things, you know, obviously you get the kids beds set up and their sheets and like all their special. Their little lamps and their nightstands and their little air areas. Of course, my kids are men now, so they don't need quite as much help with that. But lamps next to the bed is number one. But I always try to create what I call one sane space. Usually it's wherever the family is going to gather the most. And I try to make it feel as cozy as possible. Even if, like, oh, we're going to have it painted in a few weeks, that's fine. I've found it's still worth it to, you know, roll out the rug, to put out the sofas, to plug in the lamps and put some side tables in. Wherever the people before us had stuff on the walls, I would just go ahead and put some stuff out. Not in maybe every room of the house, but to create one private atmosphere. I did this even when we were in a fixer upper with like plastic walls. It just created like a little sense of home, a little sense of normalcy. That felt good. So I definitely think it's worth it to do that.
- [08:56]
B
Yeah, I can see how it'd be a little bit of a wrestling with like, is this worth it? Because we're going to be moving so soon now with all of your Moves. Did you know you're going to, or did you think, like, I'm going to sink my teeth into this. We're going to be here a long time. Or was it always like, okay, I'm going to set this up. We're going to love this house for the next two years, you know, no matter what, even if we're going to be moving on.
- [09:15]
A
It was a little of both, I would say half and half, which is. I don't know. I don't know which is better or worse. Honestly, Lisa, I think it's hard to know that you're going to be moving soon, and it's really hard. Like, we had one time, we were in a rental home, and we had lived there six months, and the sheriff came to the door and handed me foreclosure papers. And I'm like, I don't even own this house. We've just been paying our movement, and the house was getting foreclosed on. We had to move again. So that's hard. I mean, that was the time where I was like, okay, that's it. We're moving to another rental for a few years, and I'm setting it up. I don't care what. We're switching out lighting. We're doing this because you just. Why do I keep waiting and putting it off?
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Yeah.
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- [10:07]
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- [10:25]
B
visit quattrodog.com okay, so one thing you talk about that you help people with is making decisions in decorating. Why do you think decorating our homes feels so hard for a lot of us who aren't experts who don't do this for a living?
- [10:43]
A
I think for a couple of reasons. I think that there is some type of myth that we think that there are people who were born with a decorating gene, which is completely false. You know, decorating. Decorating is a skill that you can learn, and the people that are professionals at it went to school for it or have been practicing for years. I know, for me personally, like, I was decorating Barbie houses while my kids was doing, you know, my sister was doing, like, dramatic Barbie stories. I was playing with their furniture. I was moving furniture around in my bedroom at 15. So I got to learn the universal Decorating truths before I could be embarrassed, before I was buying the wrong sofa, just kind of experimenting. But I also think we've been taught that decorating supposed to be fun. So we think that if we're not having fun or that if we make a mistake that we did it wrong. And so, I don't know, I think sometimes there's some secret guilt or shame that can come with it. If we maybe put ourselves out there and took a risk and it didn't turn out, it can feel embarrassing or like we don't know what we're doing. And. And I would say that risk is home is the best place in the world to take a risk. And so maybe start smaller, take a baby step. I like to say you can't ruin something you already hate. So instead of like going out and buying a new sofa or you know, painting a big fabulous buffet that was handed down in your family, like maybe just go to the thrift store and find a five dollar table and start by painting that and see how it turns out and build your confidence that way. Yeah.
- [12:17]
B
One thing that I've noticed in the last few years is not to. Or that I've gotten better at not taking my house so seriously. Like just thinking and thinking, okay, would this color work? Would this color work? And then just thinking about it all the time instead of just putting it up there. And then in a year from now, maybe putting up a different color or putting a furniture piece in an unexpected place or like just moving things around. Like when we first moved into our home, we had a living room, a dining room, and that's what it was supposed to be, living room, dining room, kitchen. But then we realized over time, like, well, why don't we, why, you know, we don't. We need more bedrooms, we don't need this extra living space, we need bedrooms. And so we moved our bed into what would be the living room and just like not taking it so seriously, making it work for you. If you like a certain color, put it up there, maybe you can change it. Like, do you find that sometimes people really overthink things because they think of their house as something like, like you said, put in that nail hole, don't worry about it. Like, it's not that serious. Right.
- [13:14]
A
I do, I think a couple of things from that. First of all, I think that we can feel like if our circumstances aren't perfect, like we can't move forward. And I love that it you started by just evaluating your spaces and saying, oh well, how can kind of one of the house rules is ignore the builder. Like, well, they said this was a dining room, but we need to use our home to the fullest. And I think that's how you define if you're doing home right. Like, are you using it, enjoying it? If so, you don't need me. Like, you are doing it perfectly if that is the case. But I also want to say that sometimes it's those weird, quirky limitations that we have in our home that lead to the most creative, unique spaces. Like, if you flip through Better Homes and Gardens, a lot of times they'll do a little feature on this weird little cozy nook under the stairs or something. And I guarantee you, I think a lot of times, probably when the person moved in that house, they thought, what in the world are we going to do with that? Like, that is so weird. And then they took their time, they got creative, and they turned it into something amazing. And so if we can just flip our mindset to see, like, those weird things about our home that sometimes we wish we wish away, could we turn those into something really special?
- [14:27]
B
Yeah. What has been, like, your most challenging home out of the 15 homes to decorate and make? I'm sure there's been lots of things in every house. There's always compromises. There's always things that you're like, yeah, I wish it wasn't this, but we got this. What's been, like, the worst one that you're like, there's no way I can make this house cute and work for us.
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Our last house was really challenging because it was small and didn't have a lot of walls. I know that sounds crazy, but we had to have some.
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B
I'm with you, though. I like walls. Where do you put the furniture? Walls are helpful, so it's hard to
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place all your furniture, like, just floating. And I know that sounds crazy, but having an open concept, I do think is a little trickier than having walls. We live in an older house now with walls. I agree, and that is so helpful. But I think they really forced me to get creative and think outside the box. And so it helped me learn. It helped me relate to people better that have that. It helped me kind of have to think about and pay attention to how our family. What are. Where do we need to walk in our house? You know, how do we need to use it? Maybe we. There was a time where we had a love seat in front of the hearth, in front of the fireplace, and that worked really well for us. Although that might not be something that everyone does. You Know, your house is talking to you. And a lot of times I think the way our house is talking to us is in those weird things that we're, like, so frustrated with. You know, where are we going to put the backpacks when the kids come home and drop them? Or, why am I always moving the ottoman over three feet? Like, that's actually your house talking to you and saying, hey, maybe you should just have the ottoman here, or, hey, maybe you need to provide a drop zone for, you know, the kids or whatever it is. And so now I see those as opportunities of, oh, that's. That would be a fun challenge to get to create something. Doesn't mean I had to build some DIY cool cubby from scratch. That would be awesome. But maybe it just means I move that, you know, weird piece of furniture from the garage in and re repurpose it and put all the backpacks in there.
- [16:29]
B
Yeah, it totally does matter, your family, what stage you're currently in, how you're using the home. There are these things that, like, come up whenever you use a space that you'll see a problem and then creatively thinking about how to fix it instead of just thinking, this is my house. Like, one example I have of this, you were talking about open concept. My parents, they live in an extremely open concept. Like, it's just really tall, all open. And my mom kind of was thinking, like, man, I wish I would have this or this. And so my sisters and I, we started looking at everything, and we thought of a few solutions on how to, like, set up different things. And so, like, we're working through this house, and we're making changes throughout the house. And suddenly she's like, oh, I love this. Like, this is the same home. Like, one. Just one example real quick is they have this really tall wall or ceiling and wall. And my dad, he hunts. And so there was these mounts and, like, you know, elk and deer. And it felt like I just couldn't put my finger on it, but it felt like they were just floating. And so finally I thought of the idea of, like, well, you should put a piece trim and just paint from the trim down that will anchor those animals. And you can put, like a gallery wall on the colored part. And it just. It just worked so well. Like, it took a space that we thought, I don't know how I'm gonna do this to, like, this actually looks really good. You know, same house.
- [17:48]
A
I love that. And I think all you did was follow the universal decorating truth that everything in your room is in A relationship with each other. And so you gave that, those pieces of art, those taxidermy mounts that were floating, you gave them a partner to be in relationship with. And I love that. I think that's such a great solution.
- [18:07]
B
Yeah. And it's so cheap. Like it was literally just half a gallon of paint or whatever. Yeah, just like a small amount of paint, a piece of trim, and it just changed the whole thing. But it just took like thinking, okay, there's a problem here. I don't exactly know what it is, but there is a problem. And just thinking it through and I think that's where we need to try stuff. And let's say that that didn't work. Like coming back to this fear that we all have in our home. What if it hadn't worked well, it
- [18:32]
A
would just paint back over it.
- [18:34]
B
You know, there's really not a huge problem there. So what, what other kind of things do you encourage people to do? Say they're renting, like you've done a lot of renting. Or they're in a temporary situation to love their homes without being afraid that they're going to mess anything up or that it's going to be too costly of a mistake. Are there some like. Yes, obviously paint's good, but what other kind of things we talked about rearranging?
- [18:56]
A
Well, I definitely think that home should be the safest place on earth for us to take a risk. And so if we can get over that hump that just changes our mindset and allows us to do those few little things. You know, when I was in a rental, I remember feeling like I couldn't paint the walls. I didn't like the carpet. And those two things felt really restricting. And so a couple of things that helped me with that was just okay, if I can't paint the walls, how else can I bring color in? And so I would put down rugs, I would buy rugs and colors or pattern that I liked and that helped cozy up the room. Like a rug can really play a lot of roles. If a room is echoey, it can make it feel cozier, it can make it feel warmer. If you like pattern, pattern actually fills a room. So if you have a vast or like you were saying, a two story space, if you add pattern, like if you feel like a room feels vast, pattern can actually visually fill it up. The opposite is true. If you have a small space and it feels cluttered and you feel like this. I, you know, I've decluttered all I can sometimes just neutralizing a pattern and making a solid pattern or like a solid fabric can do the opposite. So keeping that in mind, adding large scale art, when we use things with scale, we naturally read that as having risk or style. And so, you know, I think I used to rely on lots of tiny little art because I thought I was being like, protecting the family budget, which I want, I totally respect. But I found that I was actually wasting money because I was buying lots of small things and then I didn't like how they look together. And if I would have just used a little bit of that money and invested in something larger, I mean, even something, something I do here in my own house that's even on the COVID of my book is just an old canvas that I had forever that I just, you know, dotted and spilled paint on and did some weird art strokes. So it's kind of modern looking, if you're into that. But I used leftover paint colors that we all have left over from our walls. And so now it created this large, kind of interesting textured piece of art that you can layer a vase and a branch from your yard over. And it just reads us something impactful just because it's big. So sometimes if you're feeling like, oh, I have no control, if you can bring in something powerful either with scale or with pattern or with color, it's going to give you such a jolt of like, oh, that made a change. That feels good.
- [21:26]
B
Yeah. And sometimes I say put something in as a placeholder. So if you think you, you want, like, maybe you want to put the couch here, and you also think it'd be better if you had a different kind of couch. Well, maybe move your current couch, live with it. Like you said, let's say you're not, like, super artsy, but you make some kind of statement art piece, put it up there and think, you know what? I love the scale of that. I'm going to search maybe for something that I like better in that exact scale or maybe like just redo, like a big print. Like we've gotten frames at antique shops, like big frames. And then I just get a design off Etsy, put it in Canva and make it that size. But putting something in, I think as a placeholder sometimes really helps just to see if you first, like, like that. Like, for example, let's say you think I want a certain color couch, maybe like drape the, the drop cloth or something over it to kind of give it that effect. Before fully tailoring something, there's a lot of things that you could do or like, bring like, another piece of furniture that would sort of act like that. Like, say that furniture belongs in a different space in your house, but you think a chair would look good here. Bring a chair down, live with it for a while, you'll put it back, but just then, see. Okay, now I can invest in maybe that size chair so I don't make a mistake. You know, are there. Has there ever been any mistakes you've made that have been, like, so terrible that you've really regretted that we should all be cautious of.
- [22:47]
A
I've made all the mistakes, and none of them have been so terrible that it's the end of the world because it's decorated.
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B
Yes.
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So, you know, I moved in this house and painted. This is my office. I painted it a color and hated it instantly. I, 20 years ago or 30 years ago, bought a sofa and hated it the day it was delivered. Word. But, you know, the. The dude bros Will say, well, you either win or learn. But Lisa, it's true. And I am so grateful that when I made decorating mistakes that instead of just like crying and hating myself for it, I said, okay, well, what I learned, well, guess what I learned that I'm kind of a neutral girl. Or guess what I learned that I like a sofa that is a timeless shape. And it really helped me from. For the rest of my life. If I looked at it as what can I learn from it helped me to be able to move forward. And even, you know what you were saying about shopping your house. Decorating does not start in the furniture store. It starts with what you have. And I think a lot of times we forget that, you know, try your different pieces in different areas. If, like you said, if you have a dining room table and you're wondering, I wonder if a pair of upholstered chairs would look good there. You don't go buy an a pair of upholstered chairs. You pull into upholstered chairs and then you evaluate. You say, oh, I like how tall those are, or, oh, those are too dark. We need something bright there. So the stuff you have actually is useful to inform you of making better decisions for the future. Stuff you need. Even my desk right now that I'm working at, I had a circular, like, dining room table for a desk for a long time and decided that in this office, it wasn't working. I wanted a desk against the wall, which I have not had in a while. So instead of just, just, well, let me Google search, get desks for sale, which I did. I looked on Facebook, Marketplace, and on Wayfair. But before I invested, I thought, I'm gonna, which is one of the house rules. I'm gonna test it before I invest in it. And I found a fold up table that we had and I got a linen sheet and I thought, this will be great because then I can first of all even know if I like working at a table against the wall because I've worked in the middle of the room for a long time. And it will also help me know, is the height right?
- [24:57]
B
Right?
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A
Is the width right? Is it too big or too little? Well, guess what? I love working at a fold up table with a sheet over it. It's actually perfect. And, you know, one day I may actually upgrade. But this temporary fix has been something that I like. Using the sheet is great because, you know, we have all of our podcasting gear and like wires and stuff. I have a little cart and I just lift up the sheet and I roll it under there and all that wires you don't even see. And it feels very welcoming. Like my last table was a cold marble and I always was like, burr. And now it's like a cozy, warm fabric on a desk. It's just very inviting. And I never would have thought that my temporary fix would have been I was just doing it to see, like what you suggested, but it ended up that I even liked it, so it worked out even better.
- [25:45]
B
Yeah, I think sometimes we think the solution to everything is to just go buy something. Like, okay, it's spring. I need to go buy spring pillows and fake flowers and, you know, all these things. And a lot of times it's. It's not like, usually the best decorating things. Like you said, you might put something either temporarily or just move things around and then that opens up your eyes to, you know, that works better for us as opposed to just like, let's add more stuff and make this place, you know, like, springy. I don't know. I think we do. We tend to think. And I fall into this sometimes too. Like, if I just buy something, you know, this will be better.
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Yes.
- [26:19]
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- [27:55]
A
I'll tell you, I had an epiphany about 15 years ago because we had moved into a fixer upper and I had put all my decor around. I sat down on the sofa and I was just like, I don't like it. It's. It just doesn't feel right. And so I open up my computer and look at my Pinterest board. I had made a Pinterest board for my family room. And I looked at some of the rooms. I'm like, okay, what's missing? What is it that I need to buy to make my house look like theirs? I mean, that was my mindset. It was like, I'm missing something. And I am. I'm willing to pay whatever it costs. I'm going to go buy it, right? And I look at their rooms and I look up at mine, and suddenly it hit me. I was like, these rooms. I counted the items, which I don't think anyone needs to count items, but it just, it worked. In this moment, I counted the items in a couple of the rooms I liked. They had like 18 items. I looked up at my own room. I'm not lying. I had. And this was just like, on one side that I could see, I had 43 items. I had little tchotchkes lined up and two small art in a, you know, mismatched accidental gallery wall and a rug. Too small, and it looked too small. So I added another Rug on top of it. And I was layering, and I was like, kind of making up for things not being quite right. And it made me feel crazy because my room was chaotic, because I had not chosen anything on purpose. I had just kind of added little trinkets and doodads over time. And I realized that all the rooms I liked, not only did they have less stuff, but everything they had. You know, if. If everything in your room, say, has a visual voice, the more stuff you add, the louder it is. And I had this loud, chaotic room that felt crazy. And I was. Was realized then, like, it's not actually something I needed to buy. I needed to edit, I needed to get rid of some things, and then I needed to get the right size of other things. And there were three things specifically. One was a rug. There's something about a big rug that can bring a room together. Whether you have carpet or wood floors, it feels cozy. It takes up this much space, and it doesn't take up any room on your surfaces. Those precious surfaces that, that we need to use, we need them to work for us. The other thing is window treatments or drapes. If, if you need a room to be cozier, if you want color or pattern or texture on the windows, again, you're adding softness to the walls. You're filling up that hard space. You're not taking up surface space. I just think, you know, I call myself a cozy minimalist. I want the most amount of style with the least amount of stuff. And drapes are like one of the best things to get a cozy minimalist home. And that last thing that I noticed in a lot of these homes were if they had overhead lighting, a lot of times they were beautiful statement pieces, like a beautiful chandelier, you know, and I had like a ceiling fan or something. And they had big, beautiful lamps with their bases kind of. They weren't like see through little dorm lamps. They were substantial. They had presence. They. They were big. They matched the size of the sofa. Like, they felt right together. And that's what changed everything for me.
- [30:58]
B
Yeah, that makes sense so many times. I think you're right. The thing we don't like about our space is actually how much is in it, not so much what's not in it. And that's. That's actually a profound thing because that costs nothing. And I talk about decluttering a ton on here because that is what has. As a mom of eight, like, I'm only able to keep track of things and like, keep. Make it to where my home doesn't overwhelm me by editing. So this works, you know, whether it's for decor, just for keeping everything in order. I think that's a really, really good point. Now you were talking about going on Pinterest. You kind of, you know, figured out what it was that you were attracted to and studying that. Is that how you recommend someone finds their own personal style or where do you help someone or how do they find what their own. Because we all have different things that we're attracted to.
- [31:46]
A
Yes, well, and I think finding your style is so fun. You know, I know when I was in high school we would take quizzes and things like that. But I will say I believe that you don't have to name your style in order to attain your style. I think really decorating is about making decisions in the right order, choosing things you love in the right order. Now, do I still want some visual representations of what I love? Yes. And so, yes, I do do that. I go to Pinterest and for every room in my house I will make a specific Pinterest board. And you know, I don't tell myself like, well, I only have eight foot ceilings, so I'm only going to pin rooms with eight foot ceilings. Or I don't have a fireplace, so I'm not going to. No, no, I just pin rooms that I love. When I think about the room that I'm doing and, and then I look for commonalities and you might notice like, oh, there's no drapes on the windows or there's a lot of neutrals or there's a lot of pattern. You just kind of can get a sense of maybe where the direction you're headed. It doesn't mean you have to copy that, but then you can evaluate what you have in and it gives you more direction of where you're going, which I think is helpful. You know, I don't. I love knowing maybe a name for my style. I know you weren't asking about that, but I think we've kind of been trained that, oh, if we just had the ideal name for our style, that will solve our problems. But it doesn't. We can't go to like the modern farmhouse store and buy everything. Style is found in the combinations. And so finding, you know, pairing some of our favorites from years past and a couple things maybe that are on trend and a couple things that have been handed down like that is what creates our unique style.
- [33:19]
B
So have you found through all the years that you've been decorating that your style has remained pretty Consistent. I mean, maybe some tweaks here and there for trends, but for the most part, you've been attracted to similar vibes when it comes to, like, rooms that you see on Pinterest.
- [33:33]
A
That's such a great question. Yes and no. It depends on the house I'm living in. I think that is what makes the biggest difference. In my last house, I had orangey pine floors, and so a lot of more primitive and rustic stuff looked there. I moved it into this Victorian with, like, drippy woodwork and dark wood floors, and it looked awful. They were, like, in a fight. But that was only, you know, 15% of my stuff. It wasn't everything. So I just had to move away from some of the rusticness. But then I have what I call, like, my timeless classics. I think that's almost better than learning our style is, like, maybe paying attention to what items in your home that. Especially if you have moved a few times. What items do you love? No matter where you live, no matter what the trends are, no matter what's in style, no matter where you lived, there are probably some pieces that you have always loved. I mean, are you. You're probably thinking of them right now. I have a white dresser and, you know, a Drexel dresser and a wing back chair and some transfer wear. Those are my timeless classics. And it's helpful when you recognize what yours are. They can give you confidence to make purchases or even to invest in something because you feel like, oh, I'm gonna like this for the long haul.
- [34:47]
B
Yeah. Yeah. I. For me, I think there's also, like, a feeling I have, like, a feeling associated with my design style, like, a certain way that I want, like, life to feel.
- [34:59]
A
Okay.
- [34:59]
B
Do you find that, too?
- [35:01]
A
I think so. But say more words. We want to know what your feeling is. Like, Tell us about this.
- [35:06]
B
Okay. So, like, I love, like, a country, like, like, picturing, like, open windows with, like, linen and, like, the front door open and, like, maybe a chicken walking in. And, like, I've always just. Maybe we're just gonna call this country. I love it, but, like, eggs out. And I do this in whatever house I'm in. I've only been in two houses, but I think no matter what, I would do that because the feeling of, like, barefoot summer country days is, like, what is, like, so exciting for me.
- [35:35]
A
You do that so well, and it perfectly fits your aesthetic. I can see that. I think that's really good to say. What are the feelings that I want to feel? What are the scenes that go in my head? That's beautiful. And you've done that. You've achieved that.
- [35:52]
B
Well, thank you. But yeah, that's what I feel like. No matter what kind of house even like my house now, I think somebody could take it more in like a fancy direction. But I love that country laid back feeling so much that I've taken it it in a little bit of a different direction. Just like the house does inform the decisions, but then there's also just kind of like the. I can't describe any other way except a feeling that I, you know, I. Whenever I pin images, I'm like, okay. I think it's because I pictured that house like, out in the middle of the country. And then some people love city, some people love suburban. And so, you know, your, your decorating choices might like, all inform that, like, feeling that you're going for.
- [36:34]
A
Yes. I guess if I had to say mine, I don't know that I would do a feeling. I'm not like a feeling girl, but I am a. I like combinations. I like unexpectedness. And I think when we moved to this, I had always said, like, I'll never live in a Victorian house because they're all haunted and weird and like, too much detail. I don't like that.
- [36:54]
B
Yeah.
- [36:55]
A
And they feel a bit formal. So in this house, what's fun is it's not exactly my style, so I get to balance that out by doing the opposite. So if she feels formal, I'm like, oh, it's such a great opportunity for me to add a little. I can go a little further in adding playfulness. I can have some big stripe fabric and I can have some unexpected taxidermy. And, you know, I have a stuffed fox with sunglasses and it can like, handle that because of her level of formality. So I like that juxtaposition. I think I always have kind of liked, like, oh, mixing modern with, you know, traditional and a little bit of unexpected that feels, I don't know, whimsical and like, ah, we don't take ourselves too seriously here.
- [37:37]
B
Right. Yeah. Well, so then you have. You have a feeling too there. Like I'm. I'm also not like a feeling girl either. I just meant, like, I don't know, like, I want. I just, I want it to feel like very country. I don't know. Like, I've always liked that. I love that even through trends. Like, there might be some trends that I throw in, but like, that's just always, I guess even whenever we lived in town, like whenever I named my blog Farmhouse on Boom, it was a little quarter acre in town on Boone Street. I still wanted to at least feel like I was out in the country, you know, and so that's kind of, I guess. Yeah. Like, how your lifestyle is, you know, all of that will play into your decor.
- [38:18]
A
I love it.
- [38:19]
B
Okay, so what are three things that you believe every room needs? Like, if we're starting with. With maybe we feel like we have no design skills, Even though I think, like you said, everybody does to an extent. Where to start? What are those three things you gotta have?
- [38:33]
A
Well, you're gonna think I'm repeating myself, but I'm telling you, believe me. I call it the homie Trinity. A large rug that is big enough for at least the front feed of your main seating to be under. Or if you're in a bedroom, you want to be able to get out of either side of your bed, put your toes down on a rug, walk around without getting, you know, in your hot lava of a floor. So rugs that are large enough. Window treatments. Try drapes. If you've never had them before hung high and wide, they are magical. They change a room. And I know you know that. I know you have drapes in your house, but something about, like, when we move in, when I get the drapes up, I'm just like, ah, it feels like home. It feels good. And then the third is lamps. I think just underestimating America needs lamps. We need layered light with a beautiful shade, you know, and of course, reading lamps and all of that, like, task lighting lamps sprinkled, they create this, like, little pockets of coziness all over your home. And, you know, I know it's getting lighter every day now, so we don't need them quite as much in the evening, but especially in winter time, it's. It's so great to have all of those lamps.
- [39:45]
B
Yeah, that's how I get through winter is like, just so many lamps throughout my house. As soon as it gets dark at night, we're not flipping on overhead. I mean, my husband does. I'm like, nope, turn that off. Turn on the lamp. Like, I need, like, that. It just feels. Yeah, I know.
- [39:59]
A
He's like, I want to see.
- [40:00]
B
I'm like, I know, but it's got to be cozy. And it's. It just feels so much better. Like, when I clean the kitchen, it does not, like, done until I turn on the little chandelier and dim it down a little bit. Then it's like. Like Luke's like, okay, so that means, like, you just can't see that it's dirty. I'm like, no, it just feels like I've closed the kitchen. We've, you know, we've cleaned it. We're out of here, you know?
- [40:22]
A
Yes. So it's like ambiance. And for anyone listening, if you don't have lamps, if you have a family room without a lamp, you know, go to the attic, bring that lamp down, Just try it. Like, it will change your life. If I. If you take away one thing, add layers of lamp.
- [40:38]
B
Yes, Yes. I have to agree with that. Okay, tell me about plant math.
- [40:43]
A
Oh, absolutely. You know, I teach an online community, and so we have lots of Q and A times. And one of the things I've noticed is I feel like there's this sense of, well, I have a black thumb or the last plant I bought died. So I just do fake plants or I do no plants. And I just think plants add so much. I mean, it's cliche, but they add life to a room. They truly do. And I think we have plants kind of wrong. Like, the goal is not to keep your plant alive forever. Like, they are not children. The goal is to enjoy the plant while it's alive. And if you're lucky, you can kind of be a matchmaker. And, you know, you. And the humidity in your house and how often you water your plant and the plant's needs, you know, try a couple plants out and see what works. So plant math is, if you think about it, you know, next time you're at the grocery store or the home improvement store, grab a $12 plant, and if you can keep your $12 plant alive for three months, well, that's $4 a month. That's a dollar a week. That's what a day? You know, like, we're getting it down to how much you enjoy it per day. You know, if you grab a couple bunches of baby's breath at the grocery store, we only expect those to last a week. And then we're like, oh, we got our money's worth it. Yeah. If we change our mindset with plants, like, oh, kind of like price per wear for clothing. If you just apply that to plants. Like, oh, if I kept a plant alive three months, like, that was so worth it. And most likely you will keep it alive longer, but it allows us to learn what works. Maybe next time, invest in a bigger plant and not feel so bad when a plant dies and they're all going to die one day.
- [42:18]
B
You know, you're right. I do this, too. I think it's because you could have Kept it alive at. Could have lasted longer. You therefore did not get your money's worth. Right. It's like when brands give you free shipping, but then just make you. They, like, charge more for the item. But you're like, I don't want to waste money, so I need to at least believe that the thing I'm buying is worth more. And I'm not just paying money for you to get it from you to me. And so I think that that's innate in our DNA of, like, well, but I could have. That could have lasted for five years, and it didn't. But you're right. It's so insignificant of an upfront cost. Like, that's so weird that we'll buy, like, a couple of orange bags of oranges. The kids blaze through them. You didn't have to have oranges. You could have just ate the food that day and not had dessert, if you will. So, like, it just makes no sense. Yeah, yeah, but I do that exact same thing. Like, I feel like buying new plants is a waste of money because I shouldn't ever let my other plants die.
- [43:14]
A
I know it's plant guilt, but enjoy your $12 plant. And I bet it might last for. You know, write the date on the bottom. You might be surprised. You're just mad that it died. But what if it lasted 18 months? That's a. That's amazing.
- [43:27]
B
I've had some plants for years, and I just let one die, and I felt so bad about it, but I've had, like, the other 12 plants for, like, probably five years, so I've really gotten them.
- [43:37]
A
Wow, look at that. I can afford a penny a week. That's amazing. Yes.
- [43:44]
B
Okay, so you were talking about your. Your book is. Is like, there's rules. Like, that's how you, like. Like, your book is laid out. So tell us a bit more about your book and when it comes out. Yes, I believe this episode will be out and your book will be coming out, I think the next day. Or. No, the same day. The same day. Your book comes out today. Okay, so tell us about your book, House Rules.
- [44:07]
A
Oh, I would love to. You know, I am not a person who loves rules, believe it or not. I do feel like I am a teacher, though. And. And, you know, when I was younger, you get your spelling test on Friday, and I used to think I am horrible at spelling until a teacher came to me and said, oh, no, no, no. You're supposed to learn the spelling words. It's not a test on what, you know, I. Before E. Except After C, here's some universal spelling truths. They apply, of course, as we know. Whether you're writing a letter to your grandmother or making an Instagram post, it is the same with decorating. There are universal decorating truths that apply to every home, no matter the style or the budget. They just work. It's like the rule of thirds or whatever, you know, all of these different unique rules that help us make confident decorating decisions. And so that is what House Rules is. It's a hundred memorable, quirky contrast is queen. If you want to be seen. You can't ruin something you already hate. Helping you. It's more of like a troubleshooting book. If you're in the midst of making decisions and you don't know why it looks off, you can open the book and read a quick couple paragraphs, see a photo of it in action, and be like, oh, my gosh, that's what I'm doing wrong. And I think it can be so helpful. Of course, the first rule is learn the rules to break the rules. Right? There is an Andrew Peterson quote, and he says, you know, he writes for, like, songwriters and artists. He's a. He's a songwriter. But he says in creative work, we have to earn the right to break the rules. And I think it's the same in our home. I think we're allowed to break the rules at all times, but we're more confident to move forward. Breaking a rule when we understand why the rule's there and we're breaking it on purpose, we're breaking it with confidence. And that's what I want. I want you to know the rules. I want you break them on purpose because you know the room is going to be better, not because you don't know better.
- [46:00]
B
Yeah. And I like that framework because sometimes it's the endless ideas that kind of makes us paralyzed. Like, I don't even know how to move forward at all because I need maybe a few parameters. And then it's nice too, because you can tailor that to your own personal style. Like, there are certain rules that work proportion wise and, you know, all the different numbers and how you space things. No matter if your style is cozy, minimalist, or country, you know, it applies across the board. So I think that's really cool. Well, tell the listeners where they can find you and where they can find your book.
- [46:32]
A
Oh, thank you. Well, the book is available wherever books are sold, so support your local bookstore if you can. If you purchase it during the week of release, you can go to then.com houserules and I have some free gifts for you. I brought a camera crew into my house and we walked around. I told which house rules helped me make every decision. I had to get the house fixed up real quick because I had a year and a half before I took photos for the book. So I had to make, like 3 million decisions in a short amount of time. And the house rules came in real handy for that. And I also were giving the audiobook away for free just during the week of release as well. So you can claim those if you order the book. If it sounds like something that would help you. If you are actively making decisions in your home or would like to be, I'm your girl. I want to be there to encourage you. So online, I'm at the Nester. I have a podcast called House Rules on Instagram. Way too much. I just love it. I believe every. Every house has a silver lining. Every house has a lot of potential, and I want you to love your home so that you can use it the way you've always dreamed.
- [47:40]
B
Awesome. Well, that's very encouraging. Thenester.com thank you so much, Mikalin, for joining us, and I know that the listeners will love following along with you.
- [47:49]
A
Oh, thank you so much, Lisa. I love what you do, and it's such an honor to. To be here.
- [47:53]
B
All right, well, thank you so much for listening. Make sure to go check out the Nester and her new book. I know that I personally am loving it as well as always. Thank you so much for listening, and I will see you in the next episode of the Simple Farmhouse Life podcast.
- [48:19]
A
Sam.