Slate Money – "Cribsheet" (July 6, 2019)
Host: Felix Salmon (A)
Guests: Emily Peck (C), Anna Szymanski (D), Special Guest Emily Oster (B), author and economist
Episode Overview
This special edition of Slate Money zooms out from the weekly business and finance roundup to delve into the economics of pregnancy and parenting, featuring economist and bestselling author Emily Oster. Oster discusses her two books, Expecting Better and Cribsheet, which take a data-driven, economics-based approach to debunking common myths and anxieties surrounding pregnancy and early parenting. The conversation critically examines medical advice, cultural expectations, the sources of parental guilt, and how evidence-based decision-making can empower parents to make choices that work best for their families.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Emily Oster’s Books and Their Approach (00:42–04:22)
- Expecting Better (pregnancy data analysis) and Cribsheet (parenting from birth to preschool) both challenge conventional wisdom and empower parents with data.
- Oster’s economist mindset emphasizes balancing costs, benefits, and personal preferences, differing from the rigid rule-based prescriptions of the medical system.
Emily Oster [B] (02:43):
"Economists are very accustomed to the idea that there’s costs and benefits, and we're going to weigh them and combine them with preferences... That’s something that economists do more than, in some ways, more than physicians."
2. Medical Advice vs. Parental Autonomy (04:22–07:52)
- Doctors' reliance on rules stems partly from time constraints, but patients often feel frustrated by one-size-fits-all advice.
- There’s a historical context, particularly for women, about being told what to do without regard for individual preferences.
Anna Szymanski [D] (04:22):
"Historically, the relationship between women and the medical establishment has often been this idea... that what a woman wants herself is not of much value. It's just there is one right decision, one wrong decision."
3. Debunking Parenting Myths: Alcohol, Co-Sleeping, and Breastfeeding (04:43–14:20)
- Alcohol in Pregnancy: Evidence shows occasional, light drinking does not have measurable negative consequences, conflicting with zero-tolerance recommendations.
- Co-Sleeping: Oster explains the nuanced risks, critiquing blanket prohibitions. She notes safer co-sleeping practices and the dangers of corner cases (like falling asleep on a couch).
- Breastfeeding: While "breast is best" is sometimes true, the differences between breastfeeding and formula feeding are often overstated, and the guilt imposed on mothers is disproportionate to the actual data.
Emily Oster [B] (08:55):
"When we say 'breast is best,' we seem to imply that it’s best by a huge margin... and that's not just immediately, it’s like forever... and the data just doesn’t support those things."
Emily Oster [B] (10:28):
"For those people knowing, like, yeah, maybe your kid's gonna, like, have a little extra diarrhea, maybe like one more ear infection. It’s like, okay, that's too bad, but that's a little different than… their lifelong success is."
4. The Rise of Parental Guilt and Optimized Parenting (06:18–08:44)
- Increasing parental anxiety today is partly linked to later parenthood, high achiever cultures, and increased participation of women in the workforce, leading to a drive for 'perfect' parenting and corresponding guilt.
Emily Oster [B] (07:11):
"Sort of 40 years ago, people were not like, spending every moment being, like… if something is good for my kid—even if it’s infinitely costly for me—I have to do it because that’s how I’m going to prove that I’m optimizing my parenting."
Anna Szymanski [D] (08:25):
"There’s this guilt that… maybe that’s why there’s more focus on making sure you’re doing everything right for your child… because there is this guilt."
5. Social Judgment vs. Medical Practice (11:41–15:47)
- Most harsh judgment for parenting choices comes from peers, not doctors.
- Oster clarifies there are differences between policy, clinical practice, and what individual parents actually do.
- Using real-life examples (e.g., side-eye on playgrounds, public breastfeeding debates), Oster urges for less judgement and more support for parents’ choices.
Emily Oster [B] (12:53):
"Most pediatricians… if you come say, 'I’m really struggling with this...’ Most pediatricians are like, “Yeah, use some formula; that’s totally fine. That’s right for you.” So they're not the guys giving you the side eye."
6. Economist Approaches at Home: Systems and Decision-Making (17:59–22:03)
- Oster describes how her family uses tools like Asana and menu-planning apps to run household logistics, illustrating how analytical/economist approaches can help create order and reduce conflict at home.
Emily Oster [B] (19:47):
"We do have a kind of slightly weird over-analytic approach to some of these systems. Like our family’s very into systems. Like we like to have… I have a system, I have like an, like a menu planning app."
7. Parenting Economics: Quality vs. Quantity, Only Children, and Societal Impact (22:07–23:11)
- Discusses Gary Becker’s economic theory about trade-offs between the number of children and parental investment.
- Oster notes there’s little evidence one-child families experience negative outcomes and discouraged unnecessary parental guilt over family size.
Emily Oster [B] (23:09):
"No, you shouldn’t feel guilty you only have one."
8. When Should Parents Feel 'Guilt'—The Exception of Vaccinations and Peanuts (23:22–24:36)
- Vaccinations: Clear message—everyone should vaccinate, no room for nuanced, personal exception.
- Peanuts: Outdated public health guidance contributed to increased peanut allergies, highlighting how evidence changes and policy often lags.
Emily Oster [B] (23:22):
"Vaccinations are a big exception to this rule... you should vaccinate your kids and you should introduce them to peanuts when they're very small."
9. How to Communicate Public Health Recommendations (24:36–26:08)
- It’s difficult to gain trust as medical advice changes (as with vaccines and peanuts).
- Differentiating between ‘bright line’ (absolute) rules like vaccines, and ‘principles’ (guidelines) for personal decision-making about issues like sleep or diet.
10. Changing One’s Mind as a Scientist—and Parenting Unknowns (26:45–30:25)
- Oster recounts her own experience publishing a theory that was later disproved—a humbling process that made her a more careful researcher.
- Highlights how in newer areas (like kids and screen time), data is still lacking, so confidently “knowing” what’s right isn’t always possible.
11. Parental Intuition, Sleep Training, and What Works for Families (30:25–33:41)
- Oster suggests intuition is often a good guide except in certain cases (e.g., sleep training, where data shows benefits even if it feels counterintuitive).
- The group discusses positive experiences with sleep training and the broader theme that parental happiness and mental health matter for children’s well-being.
12. Demographics, Gender, and Society (39:17–39:45)
- The hosts and Oster discuss demographic shifts—declining fertility in developed countries—and potential solutions like immigration.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On the value of nuanced advice:
"If you know what's coming, then you can make use of that six minutes in a much more efficient manner."
— Emily Oster [B], 03:35 -
On peer judgment:
"The side eye is the other people… it's not with your doctor… it’s more like with these other people."
— Emily Oster [B], 12:53 -
On data changing over time:
"Peanuts—'don't give her any peanuts'... then another kid, they're like 'give him peanuts, rub it on him, he's out of the womb.' ...That is an advice that gave a lot of people peanut allergies."
— Emily Oster [B], 23:44 -
On sleep training:
"Parental happiness is important… these things actually have big effects on maternal depression and marital satisfaction."
— Emily Oster [B], 32:46 -
On public health and anti-vax sentiment:
"We have very few health behaviors like this which are... clustered in such different demographic groups. Almost everything else about health, you get more education, you get better health. This is one thing where that's not true."
— Emily Oster [B], 35:30
Timestamps for Key Segments
| Time | Topic/Quote | |-----------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:42–04:22 | Introduction to Oster’s books; economists vs physicians in decision-making | | 04:43–09:53 | Alcohol, co-sleeping, breastfeeding; how data contradicts rigid rules | | 11:41–15:47 | Parental judgment, policy vs. practice, playground side-eye vs clinical advice | | 17:59–22:03 | Systems and decision making in "economist" households | | 22:07–23:11 | Becker’s economic theory, only children, and societal consequences | | 23:22–24:36 | When parental guilt is appropriate (vaccines/peanuts exception) | | 24:36–26:08 | Science communication, bright lines vs principles | | 26:45–30:25 | Changing minds as a scientist, screen time unknowns | | 30:25–33:41 | Value of intuition, sleep training as a test of data vs "instinct" | | 35:30 | Anti-vaccine clusters among the educated | | 39:17–39:45 | Demographics and the future of fertility |
Tone & Style
The episode balances warmth, humor, and rigor, blending personal anecdotes, practical advice, and economic theory. Oster’s direct, reassuring responses counter parental anxiety, while the hosts maintain an inquisitive, collegial atmosphere—reassuring parents and skewering the culture of guilt with data and empathy.
Summary Takeaways
- Most parenting decisions are lower-stakes than parents are told; minimizing guilt is healthy (except for vaccines: vaccinate!)
- Data often contradicts rigidly enforced parental “rules” in the U.S.; consider trade-offs and individual circumstances.
- Many parental anxieties are socially generated—support, not judgment, is needed.
- Be skeptical but open to changing your mind as new evidence emerges; honest, humble correction is a virtue, not a failing.
- Building household systems and approaching family life with analysis can reduce conflict and increase happiness.
- Societal trends, like declining birth rates and vaccination debates, are shaped by both economics and culture.
Recommended for: New or expecting parents, anyone curious about the intersection of economics and family life, and those anxious about ‘doing it wrong’—for reassurance, clarity, and relief from parenting perfectionism.