← Sleep Magic: Sleep Hypnosis & Meditation for Sleep Podcast
Sleep Magic: Sleep Hypnosis & Meditation for Sleep Podcast
Handling Rejection | Guided Sleep Hypnosis
00:58:49
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- [00:12]
A
Hi, I'm Jessica Porter and welcome back to Sleep Magic, a podcast where I help you find the magic of your own mind, helping you to sleep better and live better. Thank you so much everybody for being here. Thank thank you for listening, spreading the word, and spreading the vibe. I'm going to cut to the chase tonight because it's one of those nights where I have a long introduction, because tonight's topic is Handling rejection. Before we get started, let's hear a quick word from our sponsors who make this free content possible. Hey, Sleep Magic listeners. You know how much I care about helping you feel calm, centered and at ease, especially at night. But sometimes things like anxiety, grief or stress need a different kind of support, beyond what sleep hypnosis can offer. I've been in therapy myself for many years, and these days I check in with my therapist when I feel stuck, overwhelmed, or just need a safe space to sort through what's going on. Therapy's been a lifeline for me, and I truly believe in its power to help you feel supported and more in control of your inner world. And that's why I want to introduce you to Rula. They make it incredibly easy to find a licensed therapist who's right for you. No endless searching, no confusing paperwork. Just answer a few questions and Rula matches you with a therapist, often someone who takes your insurance so you can pay as little as $15 a session. You can even book your first appointment as soon as tomorrow. So if therapy has been on your mind, this might be the nudge you've been waiting for. Thousands have already trusted Rula with their mental health, and now you can too. So head on over to rula.com sleepmagic to get started today. After you sign up, they'll ask you where you heard about them. So please support our show and tell them our show sent you. Go to r u l a.com sleepmagic and take the first step towards better mental health. Today you deserve quality care from someone who cares. A listener named Cecilia recently requested an episode on handling rejection, and I think it's a great topic. So here are my thoughts. First, rejection sucks. No one likes it. At worst, it really hurts. And we have to grieve for whatever we've lost, even if it's a fantasy, the relationship, the job, etc. And at best, we learn to brush it off. But it's still never fun. Second, rejection happens. You can't go through life without experiencing some kind of rejection. It's really part of being human, and sometimes a big part. I've Spent parts of my life being a working actor, and I had to really make friends with rejection, discovering mental strategies for handling it, because in that profession, rejection happens way more than acceptance does. But there are other examples, like politicians lose races and then dust themselves off and run again. And then if they eventually win, a big percentage of the electorate still rejected them. That's a lot of rejection. And in case you never thought of it this way, for every Oscar winner there are five nominees who are rejected. Musicians put out albums that we don't like and don't buy, the best athletes in the world get traded to lesser teams, and divorce happens, like, a lot. Maybe we shouldn't even call it rejection, which sounds pretty painful and personal. Maybe we should just call it selection or choosing. Choices get made and no one gets chosen every time. And many of these choices, even when they hurt, make a sort of sense. When I've been rejected in personal relationships, I often look back about six months later and think, oh yeah, we're on completely different paths. No wonder that didn't work. The differences between us, which I couldn't see or refused to see in the throes of the passionate feelings, were crystal clear in retrospect. And that's when I see that the other person was making the choice that was right for them. And it turned out to be right for me too. When I'm rejected by someone, even if I totally adore them, the relationship, at least as I envisioned it, wasn't meant to be. And some bigger plan is just revealing itself. And that's good. Third, rejection makes us grow. Every rejection is teaching you something about yourself and what you want, and just as importantly, what you don't want. And over time, rejection can make you stronger. If you've been rejected in the same way a few times or are hearing the same feedback, it's time to let the rejection be a teacher. When an athlete loses a match, they learn from it. They get better. And when we are rejected, it might be a call to improve ourselves. Let it help you grow. Fourth, you are doing the rejecting too. Everything is about choices. We're all making choices all the time, and we have to say no to things in order to discover what we really want. So when you feel rejected, remember that you also say no to people and things and ideas all the time. We are allowed to say no. And in fact, saying no when we really mean it is one of the most important and empowering aspects of our lives. When rejection is personal or it represents a big loss, it hurts. And it's best to get some support around that. Whenever a friend goes through a breakup, I call them more often and tell them they need some babysitting. And I use that word, babysitting. They need coddling. Maybe someone should stay over at their house for a few nights. Maybe everyone needs to call them every day and just let them vent. Who cry? Rejection can expose deep vulnerabilities and we need lots of love and support in those times. But the long term hedge against rejection is to love yourself and your life. To keep your cup full so that no one can dump the whole thing over. At least not for long. Not only will building your self love probably mean you face fewer rejections, because people who love themselves are quite attractive and bring good energy to the mix. It won't hurt as badly because you'll realize that your life begins and ends with your feelings about it, that you're not at the mercy of the opinions of others, that at your center is a big, abundant fountain of unlimited energy, and that not only will you be.
- [08:05]
B
Okay, you are okay.
- [08:11]
A
The one last thing that I've realized, because I've been meditating on this topic for this episode, it's easy to think that the solution to rejection is selection. Like rejection sucks because I'm not being picked, so being picked must be the answer. But both of these scenarios imply subtly that you have some deficit and the rejection is highlighting it, and that the selection would fix it or fill it.
- [08:45]
B
But neither of those things is actually true.
- [08:49]
A
You are not empty or deficient or messed up. You are an energetic event, whole and dynamic and creating your reality. And if you live your life from this place, building your pure positive energy through gratitude, meditation, relaxation, and expand it out into your world, sort of blooming like a flower. Then you bring your lovely full self to every relationship, every interaction, every project. You are value added in your life and in the lives of those around you. And you may find that you experience lots of wonderful things and the whole concept of rejection and acceptance sort of melts away because you are at the center, creating and choosing and having a good time, making choices, just like everyone is. And everyone has a right to make choices. So tonight we're going to fill ourselves with that good energy. And if you've experienced rejection lately, hopefully this will help. So get yourself into a safe and comfortable position. And let's begin.
- [10:22]
B
Allow your eyes to close, if they're not closed already, easily and gently, and bring your awareness to your breath. This is what we do every night. Eyes closed. And the awareness comes to the breath by developing these little Patterns, these little habits, and repeating them, and repeating them, you have created a whole new set of patterns in your subconscious mind. A whole new set of patterns in your body. And already the relaxation has begun. And now that your awareness is back with your breath, just for a moment, back home with your body. As your body is feeling heavy and comfortable on the bed, it feels nice to be here. Nice to be back home with yourself. Good. I'd like you to bring your awareness.
- [12:19]
A
Up into your eyelids.
- [12:22]
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And imagine that your eyelids are feeling loose and limp and relaxed. Allow your eyelids to get nice and heavy, sleepy, comfortable. And now I'd like you to accept the suggestion that your eyelids are so relaxed and sleepy and comfortable that they won't open.
- [12:48]
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And in a moment, I'm going to.
- [12:49]
B
Ask you to test your eyelids to make sure they won't open by wiggling your eyebrows while your eyes remain closed.
- [12:58]
A
And this is just a game. I know you could open your eyelids.
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If you wanted to, but we're going to pretend that you can't. So accepting the suggestion that your eyelids.
- [13:11]
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Are so heavy they will not open, I'd like you to test them now.
- [13:14]
B
By wiggling your eyebrows. Give them a little tug. Good. Great. You can stop now. As you go deeper and deeper into relaxation. And this lovely heavy feeling you have in your eyes is moving back now, sinking back, pouring back into your head. So your whole head is becoming heavy, heavy, heavy, like a bowling ball. Just allow your head to sink into the pillow. It feels so nice. And allow that wonderful relaxation to move back inside your head, moving around, surrounding and supporting your brain. Like this wonderful mist of relaxation is soaking, penetrating, moving into your brain, taking over every cell. And as your brain is relaxing, the muscles of your face are letting go, softening, relaxing. Your breath may even deepen at some point. Good. As all mental tension disappears. And the relaxation is moving down now into your shoulders. You find that your shoulders are feeling heavy on the bed. The muscles within your shoulders softening, loosening. And as your shoulders are letting go, any burdens you carry on those shoulders, any responsibilities or worries are dissolving as well, slipping down off your shoulders onto the floor. And you can pick through them in the morning and decide what you want to carry tomorrow. But for right now, your only responsibility is to yourself as you let go into rest. Just as half the world lets go into rest with you, everyone floating and drifting and dreaming on their own individual journeys tonight. As the relaxation moves down your arms now allow your arms to feel heavy, heavy, loose and limp. Heavy on the bed. And as the relaxation moves down into your hands, into your palms, down your fingers. Any excess tension you may have carried in your shoulders or arms or neck or head is moving down out your palms as you allow your hands to open. And it moves out your palms, down into the earth as you go deeper and deeper and you begin to tune in with any of the sounds going on around you in your environment. Bring your awareness now to the sounds going on around you. Because from now on, those sounds are actually taking you deeper and even deeper into this wonderful relaxation inside of you. Allow those sounds to just move through you, taking you deeper. Good. And the sound of my voice is also moving through you and taking you deeper and deeper as you Imagine the relaxation moving down into your back now, softening and relaxing and releasing the muscles of your back. As you allow your whole torso all the way down into your pelvis to let go and feel heavy on the bed. Imagine your spine relaxing and all of the muscles in the front of your body, in your belly, in your chest, softening, letting go. The day is over and it's time to relax. It's okay to relax. Good. As the relaxation moves down deep into your legs, moving down through your thighs, down through your calves, down deep into your feet, as your legs are becoming nice and heavy. Heavy, loose and limp and heavy. And any tension you may have carried in your torso, lower body or legs is moving down through your legs, out the soles of your feet, into the earth. And as your body is relaxing, your mind is relaxing. And as your mind is relaxing, your body is relaxing as you imagine now that you are in a very safe room deep in the center of your mind. This is your healing room. Imagine you are in a soft, luxurious bathrobe and you lie down on a chaise lounge and relax, going deeper and even deeper. You're here tonight to tune in with your body in a very special way. Your body holds the experiences of your life. It holds love and joy. But it can also hold the negative experiences. And your body may be holding the rejections you've experienced. Your body has held these things without telling you. But as you relax, allow yourself to tune in with some of the heaviness or the darkness or the pain of rejection. Perhaps it registers as a feeling or a color. Maybe confusion and doubt have hidden themselves away in your body. That's okay. That happens to everyone. You don't need to figure out which feelings are hiding where your subconscious mind is, simply allowing them to come forward. Perhaps some of the negative energy is hanging out in your chest. Some of it may be in your belly. Maybe some feelings of rejection have squirreled away in, in your mind. Maybe some of it has gathered in your spine. And maybe you've collected in your body times when you've rejected yourself, times that you've been angry with yourself or judged yourself. So just allow it all to come forward. As you go deeper and deeper, allow yourself to see it, to feel it, to acknowledge it. It's been here for a while, so it's okay to recognize it. And now allow all this energy, this heavy, dark energy, is rising to the surface of your body and it's coming out your pores, rising and coming out so that it's a fine, dark dust gathering on your skin. Allow all this negative energy to come out of your body.
- [27:52]
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You may not have much of it.
- [27:55]
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Or there may be patches here and there, or you may have this dust of negativity all over. It's okay. Allow it to come to the surface. This is the negative energy you've stored inside your body. And finally, it's coming to the surface. You notice that in your healing room is a shower. It has a lovely, large rainfall shower head. You turn on the shower and place your hand in the flow, allowing the water to warm up to the perfect temperature for you. You step into the shower and feel the warm water hit the top of your head, your shoulders, and now it's running all the way down your body. Feel the water wash down your body. And as the warm water rushes down your body, the dust is breaking down, up, washing away all the negative energy, releasing. Just as you wash away the dust, the energy itself is releasing. Just as you exhale, you release this energy. It's meant to go. It's okay to let it go. You remain in the shower for as long as you need to. There's soap in the shower, so perhaps you want to cleanse even more deeply. That's okay. You wash your hair and the dark energy releases from your scalp. You wash your face, your neck, behind your ears.
- [30:45]
A
If you need to scrub parts of.
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Your body with a washcloth to really get rid of the dust, that's okay. It feels good. The rejection energy is releasing from your body, trickling down your body with the water gathering at your feet as you watch it spiral down the drain, it has released from deep within you and you've scrubbed it away. As you watch it spiral down the drain into the pipes of the city, into the sewer, where it mixes with the dark energy from other people. For every person in the world carries negative feelings sometimes. And it all is flowing to a water treatment plant where it is cleansed. And now you are clean. You feel lighter and happier. You're filling with a sense of peace and wholeness. You feel good inside. You're filling with energy and light. You step out of the shower. You wrap a clean white towel around your hair. And you lie down on fresh, clean sheets. And where the negative energy was hiding was it has been replaced by a soft, peaceful, warm energy. You feel self acceptance, self love. You honor yourself for having survived hard things. You love yourself for having grown and learned and changed. You accept yourself for being human, sensitive and vulnerable. I feel good. I'm allowed to feel good. Everyone is allowed to make choices for themselves, just as I make choices for myself. No matter what anyone else decides, I feel good. No matter what anyone else chooses, I feel good. I choose happiness. I choose forgiveness. I choose love. And I choose light. I choose relaxation. And I accept myself. I accept my strengths. I accept my weaknesses. I accept my humanity. As you go deeper and deeper, imagine placing your hand over your heart as you connect with your deepest self. I choose myself. I choose my life. No matter what others are doing, I choose myself. No matter what others are choosing, I love myself. And as I love myself, I love others. As I love myself, I love others. As I love myself, I love others. Imagine all the positive energy circulating inside of you now as your inner being expands. Imagine the positive energy expanding out from your heart, from your brain, from your belly, out your hands, down your legs. I am made from pure, positive energy. I allow this pure, positive energy to flow. As I allow this pure, positive energy to flow through me, it's getting stronger and stronger, flowing out into the world. I offer this pure, positive energy to everyone I come into contact with. As I love myself, I love others. As your inner being is expanding, it's expanding in all directions. And you let go and let it expand. It feels so good to be alive. It feels so good to be alive. Feels so good to be alive. As you drift and float and dream.
- [44:26]
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It sa it It.
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It.