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George Camel
Today we are talking about how money affects relationships and getting into some of the dilemmas. And this is not the romantic kind. This is just money and relationships.
Rachel Cruz
Handling money differently than your in laws. All right, next category, co workers, the group gift.
George Camel
One kind of. It bothers me a little bit.
Rachel Cruz
Hey, guys, I'm Rachel Cruz.
George Camel
I'm George Camel.
Rachel Cruz
And this is Smart Money Happy Hour. Cheers. This is the show where two friends who happen to be money experts talk about what you're talking about. Everything from pop culture, current events, and money.
George Camel
We are sipping on a sparkling pink mocktail, which just sounds like the description of the drink doesn't tell you a lot about it, but it is all of those things, and it's very good. So stick around till the end. We're going to give you the rating and reveal the cost per glass.
Rachel Cruz
Beautiful. Beautiful.
George Camel
All right, here's how we got here. We came across an article about a husband and wife with an extra large wage gap who shared their story on a financial podcast recently. Here's the story. Gina earns $555,000 a year as a New York City attorney. James, her husband, earns 60,000 as a freelance musician. The couple uses Gina's salary to travel throughout the year and invest 14%. But they're starting to struggle with this wide income gap. Here's the quotes. Gina said, and I quote, I've always planned to take care of myself financially if I have to. So I'm grateful that I can take care of us. But I hope that one day there will be less of a discrepancy. James said, because I'm not able to contribute in the same way. I feel like I'm not enough. Since Gina's career is more demanding, she wants James to handle more of the things at home. But she finds herself doing most of the, quote, unseen tasks of keeping up the household. How would you coach them if they called into the Ramsey show? We're sitting there. What would you say to Gina and James?
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, to me, it's less about the income gap. It's more about where do you guys want to be as a family? So, yeah, you can get used to living on what they're making. And in New York City. Right. It doesn't go as far as other places, but I would decide, okay, what do we need to make to enjoy our life and not feel this, like, weird pressure? Right. Because, I mean, I do think there could be a point that she's able to step away and do something else, not making as much. Or maybe she has more flexibility More time and she doesn't feel this pressure on her. Right.
George Camel
Yeah.
Rachel Cruz
So that would be what I would get to, is more of, hey, what do you have to make as a household to run peacefully and enjoy life? But also whoever brings in the money. I don't know, it's just never been a thing. And Winston and I have been through different seasons. I mean, honestly, like, we kind of can flip flop years. Like, he makes more. Some years I make more like it. And it's never like a big thing, but maybe it's because we're so close. If it was so spread out, maybe I would feel different, but I don't.
George Camel
Well, if she's making 10 times what he's making, he just feels, I think there's a societal pressure of, well, the man needs to be the provider and there shouldn't be this giant gap or she's the breadwinner. I think times have changed and now you can be a woman in New York City making 600 grand.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, totally.
George Camel
And so I would celebrate that.
Rachel Cruz
Do you think there's anything in a dude that's like, man, like, you do.
George Camel
Want to, like, is there something wired?
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, like there's like a thing there.
George Camel
I think so.
Rachel Cruz
Because I think for, like, Winston, like, if I quit, I know he would, like landscape yards. If he had, like, he would just.
George Camel
Do whatever it takes.
Rachel Cruz
A workhorse. Like, he would just work. He would figure out a way to make money and be like, yeah, I'll take it. Like, I don't feel this pressure that I have to in that sense. Because whatever he could make up, does that make sense? I don't know. But he has that wired in him.
George Camel
Well, there's also a piece of. I think you need to be a healthy person. And if you're an unhealthy person who's always comparing and you need to keep up and stack up, you're always going to feel like you're not enough. And so, I don't know, I think they're always going to have a discrepancy. I don't know that a freelance musician in New York City at his level is going to make 600 grand anytime soon.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
So I wouldn't plan for that. I would just celebrate the fact that she makes a great income.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
Let's use it to our advantage. Live on less than we make, stack away money so that one day, if she wanted to take a step back or say, stay home with kids one day, if that was her dream, she could do that and they'd be okay.
Rachel Cruz
Yes, for sure. No, that's a good point. Yeah. And I think the resentment of the tasks being done that he's not helping with Israel.
George Camel
That was the other piece.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. And I mean, that to me is.
George Camel
Like, has she communicated well?
Rachel Cruz
I would say 101 communication and making that much. I'm like, do you go on care.com and hire someone for four hours a week to come to. You know what I mean? Like, there's a point that you're like, do you have the ability to outsource?
George Camel
Yes.
Rachel Cruz
If neither of you are like, have the time. I mean, who knows what his schedule is. Even though he's not making a ton, it doesn't mean he's just sitting around. I mean, I don't know. But that had. That has to be communicated.
George Camel
If I was her, I'd sit down with him and have a calm conversation, not an emotionally charged. Like, I'm always doing all this stuff and you never.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, it's a never you.
George Camel
It's a, hey, here's what I'm experiencing. I'm getting home, I'm doing all these things. What are. What's a good solution? Could we get someone to help out at the house?
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
Maybe do the house cleaning, wherever the chores are that feel like they're weighing on her to alleviate him from feeling this weird. Like, oh, gosh, I never even knew that you were upset about.
Rachel Cruz
Or maybe he steps up and says, oh, gosh, I didn't realize that for sure. I can, you know, X, Y and Z.
George Camel
So I mean, communication is. I know that's going to be a theme here, people, but it is a little foreshadowing.
Rachel Cruz
You are right, though. It is more than ever that we're seeing women out earn men.
George Camel
Yes.
Rachel Cruz
That is happening within a relationship. I mean, that is becoming more and more common. So I do think it's something that you do have to be. Have a level of security but also a nod to. Like, yeah, he may still want to, like, make money and produce. Right. So guys may not feel that. I don't know.
George Camel
I would say don't hold that over their head. Like, they're lesser than. Because they don't make as much as you.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
And men don't feel so insecure that you're like, oh, I got to keep up or else I'm not enough. Totally go to therapy and deal with the underlying issues.
Rachel Cruz
Find what gives you life and what kind of scratches that it may not equal dollar amount, but at least you're feeling productive. Because I do think that's Important and.
George Camel
Celebrate the fact that one of you is making bank.
Rachel Cruz
That's right.
George Camel
That's a wonderful thing.
Rachel Cruz
Hallelujah.
George Camel
No shame in that.
Rachel Cruz
All right, let's go into some money and relationships. George. Category number one is family. And, you know, when you get into inheritances, properties, if a parent, you know, parents pass away, your adult kids are now dealing with the money situation. And all of it wills.
George Camel
Who was in the will, who's getting what, who should get what. And if it's not clear, that's where a lot of the kind of family conflict starts, in the tension.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, yeah. It's either conflict or it's just completely stressful because no one knows where anything is. Right. So I do think there is something to be said to sit down and have a conversation with your family about this. It's a really loving thing to do. Right. I'm like. And I know people watching this are either like the adult children, maybe they're not at the age where they're going to do this. Maybe you are, I don't know. But just being able to say, yeah, here's what's gonna be going on in the family, that's a very kind thing for parents to do. Age appropriately. But once your kids hit adult age.
George Camel
Have open conversations about this. Don't let it be a surprise. And then a few checkpoints. Make sure that you have a will in place. If you're an adult, you need a will. Regardless of who you are, what you're in any of that, you need a will saying, here's my wishes. I know it's not fun. Get it done. You can do it online. Number two, you need term life insurance. If you have someone that relies on your income, which would be spouse or kids.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
Get that in place and make it very clear on who's getting what. We've had calls in the Ramsey show where they're like, hey, there's a property. It's a cabin, and it's split between my five, my dad and his four siblings. And when they pass it to us, it's going to go to like, the 20 cousins. And I'm like, don't overcomplicate things.
Rachel Cruz
Right.
George Camel
Make it simple and you get to do what you want. If one of your kids is. Has terrible habits and you don't want to give money to them, you don't have an obligation to give money to them.
Rachel Cruz
Right.
George Camel
And if you want to split it evenly amongst all the kids, great. If you want to give it all to charity and give nothing to your kids, you can do that too.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. But communicate it is the key there. Okay, next, Handling money differently than your in laws. We get this call on the Ramsey show a lot. And, and I think the rub is because to me, I'm like, we're always going to do things differently than all of our. Even like my parents, right. Like not just the money, but the way you raise your kids, what you let them do or don't do, how you discipline. I'm like, your life decisions are going to be different than your parents and your in laws, period. Right. So I think we all need to be comfortable with that. I think it's when they're not respectful of said decisions. Boundaries or decisions. Yeah. And a lot of it, what we hear on the Ramsey show is even like trips like, hey, we're trying to get out of debt and our in laws are guilting us into going on this trip and they're not paying for it. We have to pay for it, but we don't have the money right now. Like, it's this whole like tension. Right. I think that's where I see it the most is like in laws are wanting to do something or the, you.
George Camel
Know, like the daughter, like her, the mom told the daughter, hey, here's what you should do. But the husband disagrees. And now it's like mother in law versus husband.
Rachel Cruz
You know what they call that? Triangling.
George Camel
Triangling, That's. Is that a therapy term?
Rachel Cruz
Yep. Don't triangle. Don't triangle.
George Camel
And it gets messy. So what do we usually tell them? Here's what I would say is this is between the daughter and the moment. The husband, the in law, son should not get involved and be like, hey, mother in law.
Rachel Cruz
And what, what are you talking about in the con.
George Camel
In the conversation about the vacation. Oh, whatever the boundary is.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. When you're having the boundary conversation. Yes. Family on do.
George Camel
Family, family, family. I don't think that like as the son in law, I should get involved.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's fair. I think it's cleaner. Yes, yes. If you go to your.
George Camel
But it's tough because you're pinning. Who do you listen to? Mom who I love and trust or husband who I'm doing life with. And you have to go, all right, we disagree on this as a couple. So therefore we need to be aligned. The couple needs to be aligned first. 100 and so it can get awkward.
Rachel Cruz
Tricky.
George Camel
But it's, it's. We say like just set boundaries. It's a really difficult conversation to have with someone who's not ready to hear that or will not understand that or take that to heart.
Rachel Cruz
Yes. 100.
George Camel
Because they then have to respect the boundary. And if they don't, you then have to distance and go, okay, they don't respect the boundary. We can't. We can't do this.
Rachel Cruz
Keep going in down this road, because it's not gonna be good. I know that's hard. It's so hard. All right, next, Aging parents or aging single relatives. So again, you're having to maybe take care of what is happening with the aging parents. But they could be reluctant, like, you want to help.
George Camel
And they go, no, no, no, no, I'm. I'm fine. I'll deal with it.
Rachel Cruz
Yep. And at that point, you can't control them. So it's like, all right, we're gonna. We're gonna have to deal with it.
George Camel
Yeah. And a lot of times it's out of a good place. They don't want to be a burden. But if you're really wanting to help and you have the ability to help, whether that's with your time, your resources, your money, then do it. Do it as a gift. Do it out of the kindness of your heart. No ulterior motives. But we get this call a lot where they go, my parents haven't saved a dime for retirement. They're broke, and I'm worried it's going to become my problem.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
What do we do? So step one is you need to have this conversation with them and say, do you realize where you're at financially? Here's what I'm seeing. And not out of place of judgment, out of a place of, I love you. As my parents, I want to see you guys be able to retire with dignity and have the best life possible. Here's what I'm thinking.
Rachel Cruz
Yep.
George Camel
And they have to be open to it. You can't force them.
Rachel Cruz
No, not at all. And at the end of the day, they have to make decisions. And I think if there's a willingness there to say, oh, yeah, let's try to do something differently, and you're able to help stepping in and guiding that. But then after a while, it is like, oh, my gosh, they're just gonna blow the money. Like, what do we do? Right. So I think that there. That's a hard. That's a hard thing. That's a hard conversation and responsibility that you feel as a kid Right. When you're watching your parents making harmful decisions for themselves. But, yeah, it's tough. That's a tough one. All right. Next category. Co workers. So co workers hanging out outside of work. Or everyone's like, let's go get lunch out.
George Camel
This is.
Rachel Cruz
You and me are like, rachel, go.
George Camel
To the fancy restaurant, get all the abs, get desserts.
Rachel Cruz
But, you know, a lot of people that we talk to that are doing the Ramsey plan, they're getting out of debt. They'll talk about this. That all their co workers go out to lunch all the time, and they're like, I'm just not spending money going out to lunch every day. Like, I'm gonna.
George Camel
How do you say no without being the fuddy duddy?
Rachel Cruz
I know?
George Camel
And you're like, no, I'm good. And like, come on, just come out. Like, we'll. We'll cover it. And you're like, no, I'm good. Do you say, yes? What if they say they'll cover it?
Rachel Cruz
Sure. Thanks.
George Camel
Absolutely. Rachel's taking a free meal now.
Rachel Cruz
I do think after a while, though, if you build relationship and know enough of, like, oh, yeah, they're. They're getting out of debt, or there's, like, there's a purpose. Why?
George Camel
Yeah.
Rachel Cruz
You know, usually. Or maybe you just don't like your co workers.
George Camel
You can share. That could be a great way to share. Like, hey, I'm doing this plan, and right now I'm trying this. No spend month.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
And they're like, what? Tell me more.
Rachel Cruz
Yep.
George Camel
I'm trying to get out of Deb.
Rachel Cruz
But it is hard. I do know friends that have been in the same type of environment, and one just keeps getting promoted. Right. And then it is this, like, oh, my gosh, difference in salary, too.
George Camel
Even within the company, your budget's different on how much you can spend eating out compared to the person.
Rachel Cruz
How about obligatory gifts for co workers or leaders at work?
George Camel
Yeah, Meal trains. That's a big one.
Rachel Cruz
Yes. I do love a meal train. I try to do it. I'm not always great at following through, but I think it is one of.
George Camel
The biggest blessings to do for someone. Did our meal train when we had Mia, you came by and brought us a great meal. You brought a great gift. So thank you for that.
Rachel Cruz
You're so welcome, George.
George Camel
The group gift one kind of. It bothers me a little bit.
Rachel Cruz
Hey, you know what I learned, I think, on this show with. We did, like, a manners episode or something, did we not? And you're not supposed to technically get a gift for your leader, but is.
George Camel
It weird to give a gift to your, like, team members? Then you have to get one for everyone or else it's Favoritism.
Rachel Cruz
I get them for the girls. I don't do this every year again.
George Camel
I have such good leaving out the guys now.
Rachel Cruz
I have such good intention. But there's been a few years. I'll go and get like a bunch of like earrings or something, you know? Yeah. I don't get a girl if I ever got stuff for the guys.
George Camel
Just cash.
Rachel Cruz
Sorry. Sorry. Y'all.
George Camel
Come on. It's all. It's all dudes here except Kelly.
Rachel Cruz
Gifts for the team.
George Camel
I have years past.
Rachel Cruz
You have. I know.
George Camel
To more like key team members. I know. There's a woman in the back. We love you, ibu. Great drink, by the way. Makes a mean drink. I think something small. I don't think, like, it feels weird to do something outrageous unless they really like.
Rachel Cruz
Sure.
George Camel
You know, But I think it's a nice thing to do for the team.
Rachel Cruz
I agree. I know.
George Camel
I prefer gifts.
Rachel Cruz
I'm just. I'm terrible. It's not my love language. I'm really terrible at gifts.
George Camel
You know what? Your experience is over gifts. I'd rather do like a fun end of year party or something for the team.
Rachel Cruz
How about that? You throw in together for this team.
George Camel
I think we have to now. I think you just threw it out.
Rachel Cruz
I genuinely thought that, like, that sounds so much more fun and like bring a significant other and we'll like. Yeah.
George Camel
Yes. We have recently done happy hours for the team. Not smart money happy hour, but a happy hour for the smart money happy hour team.
Rachel Cruz
Yes, that's right.
George Camel
So we started doing those, which is.
Rachel Cruz
Thanks, Kelly for heading that up.
George Camel
Thanks, Kelly.
Rachel Cruz
We didn't have that option. But you showed up like, we're such a good. You both came.
George Camel
We're such givers. Yeah. We did not plan this party. We did not pay for this party. But we will take credit.
Rachel Cruz
But we came.
George Camel
Gosh darn it. We showed up and we blessed everyone with our presents, which was the true gift.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, my gosh.
George Camel
A lot of blurred lines with these, Rachel.
Rachel Cruz
I know. You know what else has some blurred lines?
George Camel
What's that?
Rachel Cruz
The Internet.
George Camel
I see what you did there in.
Rachel Cruz
Our personal info that is all over the Internet. It is amazing in our world today how often we are filling out forms. We are buying stuff online. And a lot of these companies then will sell your data, your email address, your address, your phone number to data broker websites. And then they sell your data again. It just goes through and it's terrible. That's why we love and use Delete me.
George Camel
Yes. They'll find and remove Your data from all of these sites like creepypeoplefinder.com and you're like, why does it know my agent address? And I don't want that out there. And then that's how you get all these scammers, you know, fraud texts that you may or may not fall for usps. So it reduces all of that spam you're getting. It reduces the risk of fraud. And so for that it is totally, totally worth it. It's super affordable. And they're giving our listeners and viewers an extra deal. So you can get 20% off any of the plans if you go to JoinDeleteMe.com smart money. Or click the link in the show notes.
Rachel Cruz
Yep. Check it out. All right, next is roommates. So splitting up costs fairly for everyone or does it depend on what you make? Like what's the. What's the situation?
George Camel
Well then there's the like, well, you have the bigger room with the bathroom attached, therefore you pay more.
Rachel Cruz
I do think that is true.
George Camel
I think you should pay more.
Rachel Cruz
Garages. If people use the garage.
George Camel
Oh, think about that one. Wow. What about decor? Like who's bringing the furniture? Who's gonna make it look nice? This gets very testy because usually there's.
Rachel Cruz
One person who cares and wants to.
George Camel
Who wants it to be clean. One person who wants it to look nice. Usually same person. And there's the other who could give a rip. And so you're like, well, do you make them pay for half of the decor or. Cuz I. I feel like you shouldn't. Because that's something you care about, not them.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. But you are going to be enjoying it and live in the common space. Right. So I would think I would ask for a small amount, like let's agree on a budget. And then if that person wants to go above and beyond, that's up to them.
George Camel
Yep. And I think like if you brought the couch, but they bought the dining table, you don't have to like cherry pick.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
Just let it go.
Rachel Cruz
You know, we did in college. I had four roommates and we had like a jar and at the very beginning of the year we all put like $50 in.
George Camel
Okay.
Rachel Cruz
And anytime paper towels or dish soap, like stuff that we all use, you just take it out of that jar and buy it with that.
George Camel
Wow.
Rachel Cruz
It was very smart. I felt very.
George Camel
I didn't think about that.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
When was the last time you had a roommate?
Rachel Cruz
College. Because I got married. I got married. Oh, yeah. Oh, wait.
George Camel
Wow.
Rachel Cruz
It's been a long time.
George Camel
Simpler times. Do you Ever miss it or I.
Rachel Cruz
Well, I'm such an extrovert.
George Camel
You're like, woo.
Rachel Cruz
I mean, it was a part.
George Camel
People are at the house.
Rachel Cruz
I loved college, though. College was like my prime. I think I've gone downhill since. It was so fun. So like one year. Yeah. I lived with three of my friends I was telling you about. And then the next year, I got married in December, so I had half of a semester. So Kelsey and Carly. Shout out. They were living in a two bedroom. And Kelsey let me get a mattress on the floor. I shared a room with her for four months.
George Camel
That's special.
Rachel Cruz
From August to December. And it was so fun. It's so. It is. I love living with people.
George Camel
Let me pull now.
Rachel Cruz
I say that as like a 20 year old. Yeah.
George Camel
As an adult. And you never live with like, dudes.
Rachel Cruz
Gross.
George Camel
You know what I mean? Like I.
Rachel Cruz
Gross. Winston's roommates just.
George Camel
I had four roommates in college. It was five of us. It was awful.
Rachel Cruz
Disgusting. Disgusting.
George Camel
In my spa, their bathroom. Like, think about this. My section of the room was so well kept. Like, I would be vacuuming my little.
Rachel Cruz
What was it? A house? What did you live in?
George Camel
It was. Sorry, I'm getting emotional. It was like a cottage.
Rachel Cruz
So it was like very like a holiday of you, George.
George Camel
It was not fancy.
Rachel Cruz
An English cottage.
George Camel
So me and one guy were on one side of the dorm and then the other guys were on the other side with three bunks stacked to the ceiling.
Rachel Cruz
Wait, what?
George Camel
Okay, so three bunks stacked. There's three guys in there than two of us.
Rachel Cruz
Do you have a bunk on your.
George Camel
We did like, we separated them out.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, I said this was like part of the school.
George Camel
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, it's not like an off campus.
George Camel
No, I did do that as well when I had one roommate off campus.
Rachel Cruz
I got you. I got you.
George Camel
It was, you know, win.
Rachel Cruz
They wouldn't turn on their heat. They all slept in sleeping bags. They didn't like flush the. Like. There was certain things they just like. It was so. It was. It was just. You walked in and you're just like.
George Camel
There was like a communal bucket of corn that would just sit out for the week and they would just come by, grab some. I was like, how old is this popcorn? This is disgusting.
Rachel Cruz
I can't do it. I can't do it.
George Camel
I think I wore flip flops in the shower. That's how disgusting this was.
Rachel Cruz
Totally not.
George Camel
Not okay. And then the other one is. Roommates that make more than you, but they don't want to pitch in for, you know, maintenance or the upgrade or the thing. That can be frustrating.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, it's stupid. Come on.
George Camel
But I think again, clear communication upfront.
Rachel Cruz
Splitting as evenly as possible on things that are even.
George Camel
What if one person takes 30 minute showers and you're. No, that's not.
Rachel Cruz
No, don't penny pinch.
George Camel
Just live alone. If that's you don't do that. Figure it out.
Rachel Cruz
Okay, the next one is divorce.
George Camel
Great. We're really just on a roll here. Rachel, this has been a fun episode. Thanks for playing.
Rachel Cruz
I know. But this is happening. It is weird getting to the age where, you know, people that like got married the same time as you and people are getting.
George Camel
Is there a theory around that? Like, it's like, hey, if you've been married seven years at the seven year mark.
Rachel Cruz
Seven year itch is our 14 year mark. 14. Yeah. They claim that. I don't know. I don't know. I feel like it's been shortened because of our attention span in life. I feel like everything's just shortened. I don't know. Interesting.
George Camel
Well, this person.
Rachel Cruz
But I do think what happens if you're like, especially as like a couple. Right. You go on trips together. Whatever, whatever, whatever. And then the divorce happens. Not only is the relationship sticky at that point, but then one of them was like, oh yeah, I have one income now. It's gonna look different. For what?
George Camel
One was a stay at home parent and now they, they've never, you know, they haven't worked.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
Now they have to go figure it out.
Rachel Cruz
Or either way, like, you split. Right. And it's like, oh, yeah, it's a single income now. When they're used to living on a dual. And now they're trying to be like, oh, yeah, I can't afford that. You know, the change, it does, it does happen within like a friend group can be a thing.
George Camel
Well, there's kids involved. That's where it gets really difficult. Like, I've had friends who have like five kids and they split and it's really difficult in the kids. So I feel like it should be your priority to make sure the kids are okay.
Rachel Cruz
Yes, for sure.
George Camel
You know, make sure they don't feel the brunt of. Of the financial challenges or whatever's going on.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
To shield them from that. Especially if they're younger.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, for sure. Next is friends.
George Camel
This one.
Rachel Cruz
So vacations. Yep.
George Camel
Have you vacationed with friends a lot?
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, we do. We have like, we have four families that we feel real good traveling with.
George Camel
Okay. And do you. Are you all in this A similar level as far as travel. Like, if I know you want to go to the resort, are they like, oh, gosh, that's not in the budget. You guys talk about it?
Rachel Cruz
No.3 for sure are spenders. That's why I think I enjoyed vacation.
George Camel
You're like, great. We chose. We chose well.
Rachel Cruz
And then our other friends are more budget conscious, for sure.
George Camel
Do you try to, like, be aware of that when you plan the trip, or is like, here's where we're going. Do you want to join? Here's. Here's what it might cost. Or do they figure that out on their own?
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. I mean, so let me say this. When we vacation with people, all of them are, like, intact. Like, we see them.
George Camel
Okay.
Rachel Cruz
On a regular basis. So I don't feel this obligation to be like, oh, my gosh, we have to see you on vacation. It's more like, hey, we want to go to this really fun place. Do y'all want to come to? Because it would be a fun experience if y'all want to come to. Does that make sense? So I feel like that's kind of how we have done it. But we did have one trip that we had three families, and we rented a big house. And I did pick the house, and I did want it closer to the beach, which is pricey because of the kids and stuff. I'm like, it's just easier. So I would stay further away from, like, the central point to be on the beach.
George Camel
And do you tell them, hey, it's gonna be this much?
Rachel Cruz
And I talked to Winston about it before, and I just said, hey, I'm okay paying more for our share so that we can.
George Camel
Oh, that's nice.
Rachel Cruz
Be close to the beach to kind.
George Camel
Of subsidize it a little bit. Like, hey, because it's something Rachel wanted.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
All kind of foot part of that bill.
Rachel Cruz
Totally. Yeah. Like, and. And a lot of them were like, well, how much is it? You know? And I'm like, I'll tell you the. The price. But, like, we're planning this trip as, like, the travel agent Rachel. So, like, yes. No pressure. Like, there's not pressure to. Does it make sense? Like, I don't want to feel like, oh, we all have to split this all evenly because I picked the house. Does that make. I don't know.
George Camel
Yeah, that is hard. As the planner, you feel the. Of. The pressure of, is everyone going to be okay with this and what it's going to cost?
Rachel Cruz
That's right. Yeah. Yeah, all of that. How about you guys?
George Camel
We've done a few. It's been a while, you know, since having a kid. It's different. Not a lot of vacations. More trips.
Rachel Cruz
More trips.
George Camel
I know, but we've done it and it's been fun. I've always wanted to do like the. Go to a all inclusive resort or something where there's less pressure. You already paid for everything.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
There's no surprises. People can meet up when they want.
Rachel Cruz
Yep, yep.
George Camel
That one feels bad.
Rachel Cruz
But if there was like a really fun, unique experience, I'm great with doing the, like, sitting in crappier seats for the experience. Just to go with them to the experience.
George Camel
Yeah.
Rachel Cruz
Do you know what I mean? Like, that's something that I'm like, oh, yeah. I wouldn't feel like, oh, gosh, we have to have the best seats ever. I'd be like, oh, no, no. I just want to go to this awesome concert because we both love Celine Dion. I don't care where the tickets are.
George Camel
Have you ever gotten seats that were bad and then regretted it?
Rachel Cruz
I don't think so. I mean, sometimes you're really far up.
George Camel
And you're like, I was the furthest row back at bridgestone. Like level 300.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. That's pretty far.
George Camel
And it was John Mayer and he would be singing and playing, and then five seconds later I would hear that, oh, shoot.
Rachel Cruz
So not working.
George Camel
It was such a delay that I was like, I will never do this again.
Rachel Cruz
Okay, that's good. Know.
George Camel
So nose bleeds to me, not worth it.
Rachel Cruz
But like middle back section.
George Camel
Yeah. I'd say mid, like this 200 level could be worth it. But yeah, concerts and get. I'm willing to take a worse seat to get a better deal. That's just me personally.
Rachel Cruz
Yes, I agree with that. Yep.
George Camel
Rachel, can I be honest?
Rachel Cruz
I love your honesty always.
George Camel
I think I have the winter blues.
Rachel Cruz
Ah, do you, George? Yeah.
George Camel
I don't know what it is.
Rachel Cruz
Are you like a weather, like, depression, happiness, person? Like, depending on what the weather is.
George Camel
Cold, the gloomy. But you know what? I resort to what I want to just be in, like, my coziest things.
Rachel Cruz
And do you know what has the coziest stuff?
George Camel
What's that?
Rachel Cruz
Cozy Earth.
George Camel
That's the cure to my winter blues. Rachel, you nailed it.
Rachel Cruz
I believe it.
George Camel
And get this. They have a stay cozy sale going on right now. And I was just doing our laundry, as I do, because I'm a. I'm a 21st century man.
Rachel Cruz
Wow.
George Camel
And I was folding the laundry and my wife has like 19 PJ sets.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
And Then I got the Cozy Earth ones, and there was such a difference. I immediately knew without even seeing the label that these were the cozy earth ones.
Rachel Cruz
100%.
George Camel
So luxurious.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, yeah. The sheets, the pajamas, the socks, the joggers. I mean, we have so much Cozy Earth stuff, honestly. Like, we go and buy it. Winston went and bought a bunch of stuff without a promo code. I was like, babe, you got. You got to get a deal. Learn from George.
George Camel
Change my soul.
Rachel Cruz
Learn from George. No, but Cozy Earth, they are doing an incredible deal. Okay, are you ready for this?
George Camel
Hit me.
Rachel Cruz
February 7th through 9th, if you buy regular priced bamboo pajamas, which is what you need to buy at Cozy Earth, the bamboo is like the dream. You get a free pair.
George Camel
We're talking full bogo.
Rachel Cruz
Bogo sale is happening. So if you use the promo code Smart money. Bogo all one word, smart money. B O, G, O. You get two pairs of pajamas for the price of one. And y'all, these are like, they're legit. I'm gonna jump on.
George Camel
Sign me up.
Rachel Cruz
And Cozy Earth is giving our listeners an incredible deal.
George Camel
Up to 40% off when you use the code smart money or go to cozyearth.com smart money.
Rachel Cruz
All right, last relationship. George, kids, our children. How do we deal with these guys.
George Camel
Teaching kids how to handle money with friends as they get older? So I'm not at this point yet. I got it, you know, like a one year old. But you've had to now deal with. The kids are going to Susie's and they're all gonna go to this thing and it's gonna cost money. Do you just like, do they tell you how much it's gonna be? How does it work?
Rachel Cruz
We haven't had a lot of that. I have heard of, like on Instagram or like Tick Tock. Mom's charging for like snacks and stuff at the house.
George Camel
Oh my gosh. Like venmo. Like, hey, $5. Susie had a.
Rachel Cruz
You know, we had a. Yeah. And. And I'm happy to do stuff. Like, we had one of Caroline's little friends over, and I was coming home from work and Winston was there, but I was like, oh, I'll grab Chick fil A. And she was still there. So I was like, I'll just grab her kids meal too. Like, people kind of help out. And if, you know, over, you know, her friend's mom order pizza. Like, it's just. It's not really a tit for tat thing. What we run into more and I'm having. I don't know how to do this. So this is very new, but it's navigating what other kids have.
George Camel
Oh.
Rachel Cruz
And what they. And now they want it.
George Camel
That's interesting.
Rachel Cruz
I know. And the things these girls want at a young age.
George Camel
Is it insane?
Rachel Cruz
I was into, like, like, limited to. And caboodles. Like, like, we were into, like, things.
George Camel
That weren't crazy expensive.
Rachel Cruz
These kids. Yeah. They're into, like, now, like, mommy, can.
George Camel
I have an iPad?
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. Not always, like, her closest friends, our oldest, but girls in the grade. And again, it's not a moral thing because I don't want to be one of these people that's like, oh, you should never buy that for your kids. It's not. It's not even that.
George Camel
Louis Vuitton. Like, what are we talking?
Rachel Cruz
No, Lululemon.
George Camel
Oh, Lululemon. That's.
Rachel Cruz
But to me, that's like a Louis for a fourth grader. Yeah, but like, it's. Yeah. Like, you know, Stanley cups.
George Camel
Oh, yeah. It's 50 bucks a cup.
Rachel Cruz
And again, I understand we're in probably a quirky part of Nashville and not every. I don't know what people deal with, but I do think it's becoming more prevalent around because of the Internet and social media. These kids just.
George Camel
But don't you think part of it is the moms? Because the moms are wearing Lulu and they have the Stanleys and the girls are being okay.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah. Kids are going to be exposed to things. I don't know how they're being exposed. I don't know if it's other friends at school. I don't know if it's social media. I don't know if it's the moms. I don't know. So somehow they are being aware that these things exist.
George Camel
Yeah.
Rachel Cruz
So.
George Camel
Well, you have a. This is not in here as a plug. But I wanna say your kids books are a great way to help parents teach these concepts to their kids, like contentment and generosity and gratitude.
Rachel Cruz
Your little ones. I know, but that. Yeah, that's where this. All this stuff gets a little tricky. And if you've done the baby steps. Right. Like, we've done it since we've been married 15 years. You and Whitney, baby step seven. Like, like. Right. And some of you out there have been doing this for a while and you're at a point where you're like, okay, yeah, we can afford. We can afford the $35 Stanley. But just because you can afford it.
George Camel
Doesn'T mean they don't need it, you know?
Rachel Cruz
So I see this in this area.
George Camel
Like, they're they're driving cars that are so much nicer than mine at 16. Like their very first car is a brand new sixty thousand dollar car that I'm like, oh my gosh, that's wild. What are we doing here? That's crazy.
Rachel Cruz
Well then your expectations, that's my thing. Like, like that's Winston is like setting normal. What is normal in our household? You may get spikes of funds, spikes of Disney World, spikes of going with Papa Dave and me and me on a trip. Like there may be spikes in life and that's great. But like what's our baseline is normal. And driving a car that's normal. You're setting a baseline, right?
George Camel
Yep.
Rachel Cruz
Of what's normal. So how are we setting our kids up? Well, for expectations in the real world.
George Camel
Yeah. If they're driving a brand new range rover at 16, they're not gonna go buy like a used Camry at 18. It's just not happening. Like they have a certain expectation that's hard to break.
Rachel Cruz
I know.
George Camel
And you as the parent, you set the tone for that.
Rachel Cruz
You do. I know. That's why. Work, grit, sacrifice, some suffering.
George Camel
Yeah.
Rachel Cruz
Makes it all in there. Putting a cocktail and drink up, shoot.
George Camel
It back, put some hair on your chest. I don't know. These are things I know.
Rachel Cruz
I don't know what to do. Anyways, it's tough kids and really?
George Camel
Yeah. I feel like spending the night at friends houses or whatever. The thing is.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, I know.
George Camel
I think unless it's a crazy like you're going to the trampoline park and it's going to be 30 bucks, 50 bucks a kid or whatever, then I feel like the parents should go, hey, let me make sure that we cover this. You know what I mean?
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
Like you don't need to cover it for all five kids going, oh right. Be upfront with what it's going to cost.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah, that's fair.
George Camel
I don't know. Venmo each other, I guess that's.
Rachel Cruz
Or yeah.
George Camel
Give the kid money.
Rachel Cruz
I think, I mean I see the good in people. I do think parents want to. I don't think people are looking to like get a free ride off of other parents. Maybe there are people like that. But I do feel like people are very apt to be like, oh yeah, can we chip in? Right. Do you experience that?
George Camel
I don't have friends yet. Like not in the kids world, you know, like my wife.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, that's true. Yeah. Yeah, that's fair. That's fair.
George Camel
So we'll experience that soon enough.
Rachel Cruz
Yep.
George Camel
But It's a good time.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, man.
George Camel
All right, what are the keys here? My take is communicate early, openly and often, and set the boundaries where you need to set them for what's right for you and your family.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
And then don't. I'd rather you choose guilt over resentment. That's what happens is people go, I'm just going to be resentful later. I didn't speak up. Just be guilty that you brought it up. And I'd rather that.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
You'll sleep better.
Rachel Cruz
I think that's my thing. Is. Yep. Is is communication through all of this. The friends, the family. Be open and honest and then there is something to be said adult to adult. Like when you lay it out there, their response and reaction is not your responsibility. Like, you've set what's best for you.
George Camel
You don't control that.
Rachel Cruz
You don't control that. And that is so hard. So hard. Cuz you love these people. Right. So you don't want to bring harm or hurt them. But yeah. Communicating things out loud in a kind, graceful way. Tone is everything. It's not what you say, it's how you say it. It's very important.
George Camel
Beauty, Grace.
Rachel Cruz
All right, George. Well, before we get to guilty as charge, remember, this is the pink drink. It's always called.
George Camel
This is the Sparkling Pink Mocktail.
Rachel Cruz
Sparkling Pink Mocktail.
George Camel
I'm going to give this. I could not improve on it, so I'm going to go 10 out of 10.
Rachel Cruz
Yeah.
George Camel
I thought it was the right amount of.
Rachel Cruz
It was a little tart for me.
George Camel
I like tart. It's tart and sweet. It's got sparkles in it. So I'm going 10 out of 10. How about you be honest?
Rachel Cruz
8 out of 10.
George Camel
Okay. If you like raspberries, you will love this. Here's what's in it. Frozen raspberries, lemonade, lemon lime seltzer. We use lemon lime, poppy in the string because we're extra. And raspberry sorbet, which was a fun little treat in there. It kind of melted as you drink it.
Rachel Cruz
It was fun.
George Camel
And this is not in here, but there was some level of sparkle. Edible glitter. Is that what's in here? I feel like you should make that very clear before a man drinks this. And it costs $1.92 per glass. That's not bad. And let me tell you, the kids are going to love this.
Rachel Cruz
I would say that would be a fun, like, birthday party.
George Camel
Yes. Like put it in a big punch bowl kind of thing. It could be fun.
Rachel Cruz
I like it.
George Camel
So the. The recipes in the show notes give it a try this weekend. And I think your kids are gonna go with old uncle George here. 10 out of 10 on this one.
Rachel Cruz
Great. All right, now it's time for Guilty as charged. And this is where our producer Kelly gives us a new guilty charge question every week. If we're guilty. Take a sip, Kelly. All right. Have you ever or do you still mooch off your parents even though you're grown?
George Camel
Oh, 100%.
Rachel Cruz
No. I can.
George Camel
One comes to mind, and that is my parents, for some reason, have a AAA membership and they buy mine. Oh, that's like, have me added on.
Rachel Cruz
Yes.
George Camel
I don't know. It just keeps renewing, and I keep getting one in the mail. So I go, thanks, dad.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, I love it.
George Camel
That's such a dad move. To be like, AAA is very good guess you get stuck, you know, I'm like, thanks, Max. You're the best.
Rachel Cruz
Is your dad's name Max?
George Camel
Well, he goes by Max. His real name is Majid, which is Middle Eastern. He's from Egypt.
Rachel Cruz
Let me try that. Say it again.
George Camel
Majid.
Rachel Cruz
Measured.
George Camel
Yeah. So he goes by Max. Just a little easier.
Rachel Cruz
Max.
George Camel
We have a similar movie.
Rachel Cruz
Max. Here, boy.
George Camel
Goofy. Goofy movie.
Rachel Cruz
The Grinch Max.
George Camel
Oh, I was thinking Max from a goofy movie also.
Rachel Cruz
Oh, that's a good one.
George Camel
So Triple A is one I think of. There may be more that I'm not. I used to move the cell phone plan because they had the senior.
Rachel Cruz
I was gonna say, I have a company cell phone.
George Camel
Oh, is that mooching?
Rachel Cruz
I don't know. It feels a little bit Dave. Technically.
George Camel
Technically.
Rachel Cruz
Do you have it. The personalities. Okay, good.
George Camel
But I don't feel like I'm mooching.
Rachel Cruz
Okay. Mine would be if there's a really nice restaurant and I don't want to pay for it, I'll be like, hey, mom and dad, y'all go to dinner.
George Camel
And you're like, there's this great new.
Rachel Cruz
Place, five star Michelin. No, I'm just kidding.
George Camel
And. But then Dave, always gonna pay. Dave and Sharon are like, oh, yeah, they will.
Rachel Cruz
Yes. So I will. Yeah.
George Camel
Would he be so shocked if you were like, no, I got this one? Would they just be like, what is happening?
Rachel Cruz
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. But see, Sharon's not like that always. Like, we went on a trip, a girls trip, like, two years ago, and there were certain times mom was, like, paying for her own, and I was like, excuse me.
George Camel
Oh. Like, she was like, I'm not covering you guys.
Rachel Cruz
We are all back here. Yeah. She's getting a hot dog off of the vendor.
George Camel
Well, she could smell the entitlement. She went, not today.
Rachel Cruz
I guess so.
George Camel
I know not today.
Rachel Cruz
And I'm way more shameless with that stuff than Denise is.
George Camel
You'll call it out.
Rachel Cruz
So guilty, guilty, guilty.
George Camel
But that's the thing parents do. Like if I'm out with my parents, they want to cover the meal, I think so. Very sweet thing. Just let them.
Rachel Cruz
I hear you.
George Camel
Okay.
Rachel Cruz
All right, George. Well, this has been fun. If you guys have guilty as charged ideas, DM them to us via Instagram or other places because we see them and we actually have used a couple, so.
George Camel
That's right.
Rachel Cruz
We really appreciate it. Make sure to subscribe and leave us a review if you're loving this. And catch our episode on a hundred and seventy five thousand dollars salary earners call themselves poor coming up next. Or if you're listening on podcast, click the link below. And we'll see you guys next Thursday on an all new episode of Smart Money Happy Hour.
George Camel
What's up guys? George Camel here. I know there's lots of influencers on social media telling you which cryptocurrency to invest in for your star sign or which tech startup is definitely maybe going to be the Microsoft. But seriously, investing can feel confusing and stressful and it doesn't have to be that way. That's why I'm pumped to be hosting Investing Essentials with the man himself, Dave Ramsey. This is a two night virtual event where we're going to deep dive into investing. We're going to talk about how to get the most out of your 401k and mutual funds and share strategies for staying confident in your investments. Plus, we'll give you the inside scoop on popular investment trends to follow and the ones you need to avoid. It's also the only event where you're going to hear Dave Ramsey unpack his personal playbook for how he made millions in real estate investing. Now, I know what you're thinking. How could this possibly get better? Well, it's virtual, so you don't even have to leave your house to watch. Join us live on March 4th and 5th to start investing with confidence. Tickets start at 199 bucks. Get yours@ramseysolutions.com events.
Podcast Summary: Smart Money Happy Hour with Rachel Cruze and George Kamel
Episode: The Art of Talking Money in Any Relationship
Release Date: February 6, 2025
In this engaging episode of Smart Money Happy Hour, hosts Rachel Cruze and George Kamel delve into the intricate ways money influences various types of relationships beyond the romantic sphere. From family dynamics and friendships to professional interactions and roommate agreements, Rachel and George offer insightful discussions, practical advice, and relatable anecdotes to help listeners navigate the financial aspects of their interpersonal connections. The conversation is peppered with notable quotes and real-life scenarios, making it a valuable resource for anyone looking to foster healthier financial dialogues in their relationships.
Discussion Highlights: Rachel and George begin by addressing the challenges that arise when there is a significant income gap within a marriage. They reference a real-life scenario where Gina, a high-earning attorney, and James, a freelance musician, struggle with financial dynamics due to their differing incomes.
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Discussion Highlights: The hosts explore the complexities surrounding inheritances and financial legacies within families. They emphasize the importance of clear wills and open discussions to prevent conflicts among adult children.
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Discussion Highlights: Rachel and George tackle the often delicate subject of handling financial disparities and differing spending habits between partners and their in-laws. They highlight the concept of "triangling," where one partner involves the other in disputes with in-laws, creating unnecessary tension.
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Discussion Highlights: The episode delves into the financial dynamics within friendships, particularly focusing on group activities like vacations and lunches. Rachel and George discuss strategies to balance social obligations with personal financial goals.
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Discussion Highlights: Rachel and George share personal experiences and advice on managing finances with roommates. Topics include splitting shared expenses, maintaining common spaces, and handling differing spending habits.
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Discussion Highlights: The hosts examine the impact of parents' financial behaviors on their children’s perceptions of money. They discuss the pressures children face today regarding material possessions and financial independence.
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In "The Art of Talking Money in Any Relationship," Rachel Cruze and George Kamel provide a comprehensive exploration of how financial matters intersect with various types of relationships. Their practical advice, grounded in real-life examples, offers listeners actionable strategies to foster healthier, more transparent financial dialogues in their personal and professional lives. By emphasizing communication, boundary-setting, and mutual respect, Rachel and George empower their audience to navigate the complexities of money in relationships with confidence and grace.
Note: This summary excludes promotional segments and focuses solely on the episode's core content as per the provided transcript.