Unicorns vs. Dragons

Summary

Smash Boom Best: "Unicorns vs. Dragons" (June 6, 2019)

Host: Molly Bloom
Debaters: Katie McVey (Team Dragon) & Sandon Totten (Team Unicorn)
Judge: Koby

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Episode Overview

In this magical, laugh-out-loud episode of Smash Boom Best, two of the most iconic mythical creatures—unicorns and dragons—go head to head in a playful, fact-filled debate. Host Molly Bloom leads the charge as debaters Katie McVey (Team Dragon) and Sandon Totten (Team Unicorn) deliver zingers, stories, historical digs, and passionate rhetoric—each vying for the ultimate title: Smash Boom Best. Judge Koby listens closely and weighs in at each round. The episode is a lively mix of education, folklore, pop culture, and inventive fun, perfect for kids and families.

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Main Segments & Key Discussion Points

1. Introduction & Judge Insight

• Opening banter sets the tone as kids and the host share their initial feelings about dragons and unicorns, mentioning fire-breathing vs. rainbow vibes (00:27–01:34).
• Judge Koby expresses a preference for dragons as intimidating pets, but is wary of their fierceness (“...if I was walking down the street with a dragon...you wouldn’t really come up to me...”, 01:04–01:23).

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2. Rules of the Debate (03:00–03:54)

• Four structured rounds:
  1. Declaration of Greatness: Debaters present their best stories and facts.
  2. Micro Round: Pre-written creative challenge.
  3. Sneak Attack: Surprise improv challenge.
  4. Final Six: Persuasion in just six words.

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3. Round 1: Declaration of Greatness

Team Dragon (Katie McVey, 04:22–09:57):

• Dragons in history & myth:
  • "Dragons have captured the human imagination since at least the 4th century BCE. That's older than the Colosseum, the Eiffel Tower, and anyone you've ever met." (04:31)
  • Global presence: legends from Mesopotamia, India, Egypt, China, England.
• Medieval legend:
  • Dramatic retelling of St. George’s victory over a dragon, highlighting dragons as timeless symbols of danger and power (05:06–07:14).
• Dragons' versatility:
  • Sometimes evil, sometimes lucky (e.g., Chinese dragon as symbol of good fortune), sometimes just misunderstood.
  • "Dragons can be whatever you want them to be, but they're always cool." (09:00)
• Possible inspiration for dragons:
  • “Historian Adrienne Mayer theorizes that...when our ancestors found dinosaur bones, they attributed them to dragons.” (09:05)
• Komodo dragon cameo:
  • Highlighting dragons’ real-life namesakes (09:31–09:44).

Team Unicorn (Sandon’s 30-second rebuttal, 10:22–10:53):

• Critiques dragons’ dangerous image: “Most of the time they represent a terrible bad guy who's out to burn your face off. And we don't like that. We have faces for a reason...” (10:24)
• Pokes fun at “dragon breath.”

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Team Unicorn (Sandon Totten, 11:09–15:49):

• Unicorn legend & worldwide lore:
  • “According to legend, unicorns are tough as nails. Super magical, butt kicking, crime detecting, poison purifying forces of nature. Being pretty is just a side gig.” (11:13)
• Heroic tale:
  • Retells tale of Isabelle’s unicorn defeating a dragon, showcasing unicorns’ strength and magical protection (12:15–13:01).
• Global variants:
  • Carcadon (Persia/India, like a rhino), Qilin (China) for good omens, Kirin & Sinew (Japan), the latter detecting guilt: “The Sinew says it was the butler, your honor.” (13:57)
• Magical powers:
  • Purifying water, curing disease, protecting royalty; even a Danish throne allegedly made entirely of unicorn horns—revealed to be narwhal tusks (14:30–14:58).
• Cultural presence:
  • Ubiquitous in toys, cartoons, fashion, and food trends.
  • “They are the total package. Fierce fighters, defenders of justice, bringers of magic, and, yes, very pretty to look at.” (15:39)

Team Dragon (Katie’s rebuttal, 16:32–16:58):

• Argues unicorns are snitches, questions their real usefulness, and decries medieval medical myths: “Unicorns, nobody likes to snitch... you're the big pharma of medieval Europe. Nobody likes it.” (16:34)
• Downplays unicorns slaying dragons as rare.

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4. Micro Round: "I'd Like to Thank the Academy" (22:14–26:04)

Prompt: Each team gives an acceptance speech for an imaginary award.

Team Unicorn (Sandon, 22:45–24:16):

• Wins “the thing that inspired the greatest works of art and culture.”
• Thanks to ancient manuscripts, paintings, the unicorn tapestries, TV, My Little Pony, and pop art trends (“Sup, my bronies. I see you.”, 23:29).
• Shout-out to Lisa Frank: “Your hyper colored rainbow pictures. Show the real me. This is for you.” (24:02)
• “Dare to be yourself, everyone.” (24:10)

Team Dragon (Katie as a dragon, 24:29–26:02):

• Wins “Most Beautiful Mythological Creature.”
• Cocky and humorous: “With my dazzling wit and glittering hoard of treasure, who could ignore me? No one.” (24:41)
• Mocks competition: “Who is going to win? The Hydra? The Chimera? The Unicorn? That little weird headed horse? Don’t make me laugh.” (25:03)
• Signs off with fiery charm: “You're welcome for even dating to Ta Ta. Much love. Goodbye from me, the dragon.” (25:55)

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5. Sneak Attack: "By Any Other Name" (26:37–28:30)

Prompt: Come up with three alternative names for your creature.

Team Dragon (Katie, 27:53):

• Serpentine Dream Makers
• Beautiful Sky Demons
• Fire Yellers of the Ozone Layers

Team Unicorn (Sandon, 28:16):

• Pretty Pointy Ponies
• Spear Headed Horses
• Magical Mares of the Forest

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6. Final Six Words (29:14–29:34)

Team Unicorn (Sandon, 29:14):

• “Always choose your one horned friend.”

Team Dragon (Katie, 29:29):

• “Pockets of money, bellies of fire.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Katie McVey (Team Dragon):
  • “Because if you don't crown them the best, they will burn you alive. So, something to think about.” (02:29)
  • “Dragons can be whatever you want them to be, but they're always cool.” (09:00)
• Sandon Totten (Team Unicorn):
  • “According to legend, unicorns are tough as nails. Super magical, butt kicking, crime detecting, poison purifying forces of nature. Being pretty is just a side gig.” (11:13)
  • “They are the total package. Fierce fighters, defenders of justice, bringers of magic, and, yes, very pretty to look at.” (15:39)
  • Lisa Frank shout-out: “Your hyper colored rainbow pictures. Show the real me.” (24:02)
• Judge Koby:
  • “One thing that I noticed very fast was that... the dragons tend to die a lot... and the unicorn has magic skin—what, that's impervious to fire?” (15:54)
  • “These are mind twisting decisions, yes.” (17:51)

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Episode Finale: Decision & Takeaways

• Judge Koby chooses... Dragons! (30:24)
  • “After careful deliberation, trials and tribulation, dragons and unicorn nations, I have decided... Dragons are the winner.” (30:08–30:26)
• Sportsmanship and camaraderie: Both debaters compliment each other's skill and recognize the greatness of both creatures.
  • Sandon: “I would love to see unicorns and dragons together. I mean, honestly, I’d hang out with them over people almost any day.” (31:13)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Opening & Introductions: 00:00–02:13
• Judge Koby Q&A: 00:59–02:09
• Debate Rules: 03:00–03:54
• Declaration of Greatness—Dragon: 04:22–09:57
• Rebuttal—Unicorn: 10:22–10:53
• Declaration of Greatness—Unicorn: 11:09–15:49
• Rebuttal—Dragon: 16:32–16:58
• Micro Round: 22:14–26:04
• Sneak Attack: 26:37–28:30
• Final Six: 29:14–29:34
• Final Decision: 30:24

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Tone and Style

The episode’s tone is clever, animated, and unintimidating—whimsical, yet surprisingly informative. The debaters banter good-naturedly and keep things accessible for kids by mixing big ideas with silly jokes, wild stories, and pop culture references.

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Episode Takeaway

Through humor, folklore, and a touch of history, "Unicorns vs. Dragons" delivers a lively crash course in debate while celebrating the sparkle and sizzle of two legendary creatures. Whether you side with the rainbow-horned or the fire-breathing, you’ll walk away with new facts, a smile, and perhaps a favorite mythical bestie.

Winner: Dragons
But the real winners: Listeners, who get to join the debate, laugh, and learn along the way!

Transcript

[A]

From the brains behind brains on, it's.

[B]

Smash Boom Best, the show for people with big opinions.

[C]

Hi, I'm Molly Bloom and this is Smash Boom Best, the show where we take two things, smash them together, and ask you to decide which one is best. Today's debate is a mythical matchup between two creatures that usually dwell in the realm of fantasy. But they're paying us a visit today. It's dragons versus unicorns.

[D]

Dragons because they can fly and they can breathe fire.

[B]

A unicorn, most likely, it's more practical.

[C]

To take care of. Dragons are better because I'm terrified of the horns of the unicorn.

[D]

I like dragons better.

[C]

I like how they can breathe fire. Only one of these whimsical, wondrous beasts will triumph. Will it be the ferocious, fire breathing team Dragon or the ethereal, elusive team Unicorn? We have a judge here in the studio to settle this debate. Hello, Koby.

[D]

Hello.

[C]

So if you had to have one as a pet, dragons or unicorns, which one would you choose?

[B]

That's tough because dragons are pretty intimidating. Like, if I was walking down the street with a dragon, you wouldn't really come up to me and be like, hey, you, your dragon is nothing. Like, I don't care about your dragon. You wouldn't do that. I would be like, I got a dragon in my guy.

[C]

But would you do that to a unicorn, either?

[B]

A unicorn, I personally wouldn't, but I feel like dragons are like, they have more fire tendencies and people are more afraid of fire than rainbows.

[C]

More fierce. Yeah, got it. So because this is a debate show, I want to know, do you ever get in debates with your friends or your family?

[B]

All the time, yes. Especially more with my friends. My families are more like. My family knows how to finesse their arguments a lot better than my friends do. So I win more arguments with my friends.

[C]

I would say so how do you do that? How do you win?

[B]

Just wordplay. They'll say something and I'll quick turn it into something different, and then I'll bring it back to the original point and tie it all together very loosely. But I'm very convincing.

[D]

Ah.

[B]

And I'll like. They'll be like, oh, I guess. And I'm like, I don't think you should.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

All right. I think it's high time we got our debaters in here.

[B]

Let's do it.

[C]

In one corner, ready to spit some red hot rhetoric on behalf of team Dragon, it's Katie McVey.

[D]

Hi, it's me, Katie McVay for Team Dragon.

[C]

Katie, in just a single sentence, why do dragons deserve to be crowned the Smash Boom Best?

[D]

Because if you don't crown them the best, they will burn you alive. So, something to think about.

[C]

And here to wrap the fanciful but still very fearsome Team Unicorn, it's Sandon Totten.

[A]

That's right, I'm here. And Clomp. Clomp, clomp. You hear that? It's Team Unicorn coming for you, Sand Tottenham.

[C]

Tell us, why are unicorns going to win the day?

[A]

Because they are mighty, they are majestical, they are super magical, and they look good all the time.

[C]

Okay, well, this fantastical face off just got very real. But hold your horses, everyone. You too, Team Unicorn. Let's review the rounds before we start this debate battle. Round one is when debaters make their declaration of greatness. It's their time to share all the best stories, facts and figures they've dug up about their side. Next is the micro round. It's a creative challenge the debaters have prepared for in advance. Round three is the sneak attack, a surprise challenge to keep both teams on their toes. And finally, for the fourth round, it's the final six, when both sides have just six words to persuade the judge that their team should take home the title of Smash Boom Best. And every round, Kobe here and our listeners at home will award a point to the side that won them over. If you're keeping score at home, you can download a score sheet from our website, smashboom.org all right, team Dragon and Team Unicorn, are you ready to bring the heat?

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

How about you, Coby? Do you feel emotionally prepared for the journey ahead?

[B]

I think so. I think so.

[C]

Excellent. Let's kick this thing off. With our first round declaration of greatness. Our debaters are ready to drop some serious knowledge about these creatures of legend. We did a coin flip and Katie, you're up first. It's time for you to ignite this debate with your declaration of greatness.

[D]

Do you hear that? It sounds majestic, glorious, dangerous. Yep. I knew it. It's a dragon. Dragons are one of the most storied and long lasting fantasy creatures of all time. Dragons have captured the human imagination since at least the 4th century BCE. That's older than the Coliseum, the Eiffel Tower, and anyone you've ever met. People from all over the world have been talking about dragons for, well, as long as they've been talking. Dragons appear in mythology from such disparate places as ancient Mesopotamia, India, Egypt, China, and England. Everywhere in the world, someone had a story about a dragon. Actually, while I have you here, let me tell you one? It's a good one. Basically the Star wars of the 11th century. St. George was a handsome adventurer. He was fun to be around, great headed and well known for his sword skills.

[A]

Ho ho. Tis I super cool adventure guy, St. George.

[B]

And don't you forget it.

[D]

One day, his adventures took him to a town in Libya. At one point, the town had been swinging parties, dances, you name it. That's why St. George went. But now. Oh wow. Now it was sad. A terrifying, amoral and hungry dragon had taken up residence in the town's la. Every day, the townspeople fed the dragon two sheep.

[C]

Lamb burgers, lamb fries. Feed me those lamb thighs. I love to eat a sheep. A very special treat.

[D]

But one day, the town ran out of sheep.

[C]

Well, well, well. I've always wanted to eat a human or 2.

[A]

Or 20.

[D]

The king made a declaration.

[A]

Every day, one of our townspeople, young or old, rich or poor, will be fed to the dragon. Only by sacrificing some can we save most.

[D]

And the king meant it. Or so he thought. Until one day, the time came for the king's own daughter to be fed to the dragon. The king tried to plead with the dragon. He'd give the dragon all his riches. He'd give the dragon all his gold. He'd give the dragon his crown, his kingdom, all his favorite pie recipes. Just anything. If the dragon would agree not to eat the princess. But the dragon, he only had one reply.

[C]

Oh, no, no, no.

[A]

But when I devour your beloved daughter.

[C]

I will be sure to return her crown.

[D]

And so the princess was sure to die. As she was standing at the lake's edge, contemplating her fate and waiting for the dragon to rise from the surface and consume her, a St. George rode into town.

[A]

What's a royal girl like you doing.

[B]

By a lake like this?

[C]

A dragon is coming to eat me.

[D]

And if you don't want to get.

[C]

Eaten too, I'd suggest you skedaddle.

[D]

As the princess finished her warning, the dragon rose from the lake with a mighty roar. Its scales glimmered in the morning sunlight, and its rise made the lake churn with terrible waves. And St. George, not even noticing the dragon's frightening visage, speared him right in the gut. Ow. St. George. And the princess rolled into town with the defeated dragon in their wake. And hoo, boy, you've never seen a party so big in your life. In the story of the dragon and St. George, the dragon represents pure evil and St. George pure goodness. In the medieval European imagination, this story was not just about a dragon and a Man, but about morality, humanity and religion. But dragons aren't always the bad guys. Dragons have represented many things during their long run in humanity's imagination. The Egyptian God Apep, a giant serpent with a head made of flint, represented the chaos of nature. Ancient Egyptians blamed him for everything from thunder to solar eclipses. In Chinese mythology, the dragon is a sign of good luck and good fortune. It also represented the power of the emperor. In fact, in the 19th century, during the Qing Dynasty, a deep blue dragon was chosen to represent the nation on China's first national flag. Today, in the how to Train youn Dragon movies, dragons are fun, friendly and cute. They're looking to help humans and participate in a cooperative society.

[A]

We have.

[D]

Dragons. Dragons can be whatever you want them to be, but they're always cool. Whether a serpent like dragon or a gold hoarding western dragon, humanity stands in awe of their grandeur and pure power. Historian Adrienne Mayer theorizes that the reason dragons are such a worldwide topic of conversations in the the beginning of time is because when our ancestors found dinosaur bones, they attributed them to dragons. And you can understand why when you consider that the largest living lizard is called the Komodo dragon.

[A]

Yeah, and watch out for me. I can weigh over 300 pounds and grow up to be 10ft long.

[C]

For sure. For sure.

[D]

Komodo dragon. Call me when you can breathe fire.

[A]

I usually avoid humans, so probably not going to happen. Plus, no thumbs.

[D]

Dragons. Can't live with them, but humanity has never lived without them.

[C]

Very nice, Katie Colby, what did you think? What in that argument stood out for you?

[B]

Definitely the beginning with the first.

[D]

What was it?

[B]

St. George story. That dragon was scary. Definitely. Very scary indeed.

[C]

Now, Sandin, I know you're chomping at the bit to make your rebuttal, so you have 30 seconds to respond, starting right now.

[A]

Okay, so first of all, Katie, you mentioned that dragons have represented lots of things, but let's be honest, most of the time they represent a terrible bad guy who's out to burn your face off. And we don't like that. We have faces for a reason. They're pretty, they're there. We don't want them burned off. So, you know, stay away dragons. Second of all, dragon breath. That is a famous term for people with terrible breath because dragons, they're always, they've got bad breath and even the fire doesn't seem to be able to stop that. Maybe they should stop eating garlic bagels or whatever they're eating all the time. Then also they're latte.

[C]

Wow, this is Heated. You know, Sandon, I do personally like garlic bagels, so I don't think that's a bad thing. But I know you have a lot more thoughts to share, and you're in luck, because it's time to deliver your own declaration of greatness. You ready?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Have at it.

[A]

Picture a unicorn. You probably see a majestic white horse like animal with a long spiraling horn. Maybe it's prancing in a meadow, or thinking deep thoughts by a waterfall. Or galloping across a rainbow bridge of moonbeams, sparkle dust and butterfly wishes. But that's just a cover. According to legend, unicorns are tough as nails. Super magical, butt kicking, crime detecting, poison purifying forces of nature. Being pretty is just a side gig. Take the legend of Bartholomew and Isabelle. They lived in the Middle Ages. A time of kingdoms, castles and questionable hygiene. What do you mean a bath every year? That's Bartholomew, a famous knight who tamed a lion and learned to ride it like a horse.

[D]

That's cool.

[A]

But not as cool as my ride. And that's Isabelle. Her dad gave her a unicorn as a wedding gift.

[D]

Thanks, dad.

[A]

All was chill in the land until one day an evil dude kidnaps Isabelle and hides her away. You're locking me in a castle?

[C]

Seriously?

[A]

That's so cliche. My lion and I are coming to rescue Isabelle. But the castle is guarded by a fire breathing dragon. Bartholomew and his lion attack.

[C]

Hiya.

[A]

But that doesn't go too well because you know, fire.

[B]

Ouch.

[C]

Ouch.

[A]

So they're about to retreat when out of nowhere. It's Isabelle's unicorn. It stabs the dragon with its horn.

[D]

Ow.

[A]

The dragon blasts it with flames, but they just sizzle off its magical skin. The unicorn strikes again and again until a horn through the heart. The dragon falls. Defeated. I am defeated.

[D]

Yay.

[C]

Unicorns are the best.

[A]

What happened to the kidnapper?

[B]

Meh.

[A]

I pushed him out the window. Seriously? That's in the story. Isabelle takes out the kidnapper and the unicorn takes out the dragon. It's almost like Bartholomew was unnecessary. Hey, dragon slaying and day saving are just part of the picture. Early records of unicorns go back as far as the 4th century BCE and they show up in stories around the world where they go by different names. In ancient Persia and India, there's the mighty Carcadon. This fierce one horned beast looks sort of like a rhino. And some say Alexander the Great rode one into battle in China. There's the Qilin. Sometimes described as having flowing hair like a lion's mane and scales across Its body when it shows up. Either a great person will be born soon, or a death is coming. Japan has both the kirin and the sinew. The sinew can tell if you are guilty, and legend says it was used in criminal cases.

[B]

The sinew says it was the butler, your honor.

[C]

Then he did it.

[A]

That's law and svu so very unicorn. One thing these unicorns have in common, besides the horn is that they're all super magical. In fact, medieval Europeans believed when a unicorn dips its horn in a river or lake, it purifies the water. They also thought ground up horn could cure pretty much any disease and even destroy poisons. So back then, rich people paid tons to get their hands on even a small piece of horn. And then there was one king in.

[C]

The world that could sit on a.

[A]

Throne of unicorn horn and be protected against anything evil. That was just fantastic, isn't it? That's Peter Christensen, a curator at the royal collections in Copenhagen, Denmark. He's talking about a Danish king, Christian V. His father built him this amazing throne of unicorn horns around 1660. Epic. It was used by Danish kings until the 1800s. It really made a great impression all.

[C]

Over Europe because people have heard of.

[A]

Thrones of ebony and gold and diamonds, but no one had ever heard about a throne of unicorns. I bet those other kings had serious throne envy. The horns were actually tusks from a whale called a narwhal. It's one of a handful of real creatures, like the rhino that likely inspired stories of unicorns. And even today, the legend lives on. Unicorns show up on T shirts, in toy aisles, on cupcakes, and in cartoons. And it's no wonder. They are the total package. Fierce fighters, defenders of justice, bringers of magic, and, yes, very pretty to look at. Join team Unicorn, and you two can ride off into the sunset on a rainbow bridge of moonbeams, sparkle dust, and butterfly wishes. Or you can side with dragons who will probably eat you unless you're a unicorn.

[C]

Some very, very compelling stuff from team unicorn there. So what do you think, Coby? What stood out to you?

[B]

One thing that I noticed very fast was that the dragons tend to die a lot. You tend to die a lot. And the unicorn has magic skin. What, that's impervious to fire?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And they never get acne.

[B]

Ooh, that's a big one.

[D]

You're just making stuff that misses a lot. Have you ever seen a unicorn with acne?

[A]

I haven't.

[D]

I've never seen a unicorn. You name me a modern unicorn who's participating in the culture. You can't name a single one.

[A]

Oh, I will. It's coming.

[C]

Oh, man. Well, both teams get a chance to rebut. So now you are up. Katie, your 30 seconds start. Now.

[D]

I think it's interesting that Sandon made a lot of arguments that I think bring unicorns into bad light. First off, unicorns, nobody likes to snitch. Secondly, you know who didn't have good health care? All of medieval Europe. And yet here you are participating. You're the big farmer of medieval Europe. Nobody likes it. Also, one unicorn beating a dragon does not a winning streak make. So call me when you've slayed a village of dragons and then we'll talk. Okay. Unicorns get two horns.

[C]

If you're so special. That does it for round one. Which means it's time to award the first point. Okay, Kobe, don't tell us who you're going to give it to. Take a minute to think. Who impressed you this round? Who made the most compelling argument? Okay, once you've decided, you can mark it down.

[D]

Ooh.

[A]

I wanna say, Katie, I don't think unicorns were really participants in this pharmacological. I think they didn't wanna be medicine. It's kind of an unfortunate side effect.

[D]

Of being aw, listen, they're not awesome, so they stink.

[C]

Kobe, have you awarded like dragon breath?

[D]

I mean, never look a unicorn in the mouth. You know what I mean?

[C]

Kobe, have you awarded your point?

[B]

I have.

[C]

Excellent.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

The suspense. The suspense. Listeners at home, you can always press pause if you need more time. These are very difficult decisions, are they not, Kobe?

[B]

They are mind twisting decisions. Yes.

[C]

So Katie and Xandon, how are you feeling at this point? Are you feeling optimistic?

[D]

Of course I am. I'm team dragon, the best creature.

[A]

So stress is just sizzling right off my magical skin. I'm fine.

[D]

Ooh.

[C]

We are going to give you two a breather while we take a break. And if you have a great idea for a debate or just want to say hello, head to smashboom.org we love hearing from you.

[B]

We will be right back with more smashboom.

[A]

Bess, you're watching State of debate.

[C]

Home to rage and rhetoric and awe inspiring argumentation.

[D]

Taylor Lincoln here along with four time debate champ Todd Douglas. And Todd, we have got a doozy going down today at Jones beach in Long Island, New York.

[A]

Indeed we do. Taylor, a bologna sandwich and a seagull are going head to head in a debate about which condiment reigns supreme. Mustard or mayo?

[D]

Ooh. And it Looks like this foodie feud is getting hot. Take it from me, a bologna sandwich Mayonnaise is the best. Creamy, salty, and delicious. No way.

[A]

Sandwich lady mustard is king. It's sophisticated, classic, and it's got bite.

[D]

Are you kidding me? Seagull mustard is sour. It ruins the flavor profile of everything it's on.

[A]

I wouldn't trust the taste buds of someone as unhealthy as you, Baloney. Have you seen your fat content? And oh, yeah, you're full of baloney.

[D]

Holy guacamole. I'm gonna call foul on that logical fallacy.

[A]

Darn right. Logical fallacies are a number one. Oh, no, no. On State of Debate, logical fallacies are.

[D]

Those sloppy shortcuts that people sometimes take, but they actually just make it easier to poke holes in your argument. All star debaters usually know to steer clear of logical fallacies.

[A]

Bingo bango, Taylor, there are a bunch of different kinds of logical fallacies, and they have different names. The one we just heard that salty seagull make is called an ad hominem.

[D]

That's when you make a personal attack on your opponent instead of addressing their argument.

[A]

A lazy move by the seagull. Did you hear how he insulted that sandwich? I wouldn't trust the taste buds of someone as unhealthy as you, Baloney.

[C]

Have you seen your fat content?

[A]

And oh, yeah, you're full of bologna.

[D]

Ooh. He didn't address the sandwich's argument at all.

[A]

Nope, not the way to win a debate. Taylor. And the kid listening ended up siding.

[B]

With the baloney sandwich. Let's take a listen.

[D]

Hey, seagull, stop insulting my bologna sandwich.

[A]

Maybe if you used some facts and.

[D]

Expert opinions to defend mustard, I'd be on your side. But you lost me with that nasty ad hominem attack. Ooh, man. Gosh. Just goes to show you that ad hominem faucies don't win the bait.

[C]

Nope.

[A]

If you're playing dirty, people can tell. So keep those arguments clean, debaters, and we'll catch you next time on State of Debate.

[D]

Boom.

[C]

Smash. Smash.

[D]

Boom. Best.

[C]

And we're back. You're listening to Smash Boom Best, the show about showdowns. We get incredible debate ideas from our listeners all the time. Like this one from Sully in Santa Cruz, California.

[D]

I have a debate idea, and it is skateboarding versus roller skating.

[C]

We will check in again with Sulli at the end of the show to see who he thinks should win. All right, it's time to get back to the fantastical focus of this debate. Unicorns versus Dragons. Our judge Coby here is taking in a lot of info. How are you feeling, Coby? Are you feeling swayed in either direction?

[B]

I'm not gonna lie, I was pretty pro dragons in the beginning, but the unicorn side did come with some.

[D]

Oh, yes, everybody loves an underdog, but it's always the hero who.

[A]

It's even better when an under horse an undercorn.

[C]

So Santon and Katie, are you ready to spar some more?

[D]

Of course. I was born ready.

[C]

Excellent, because it's time for.

[D]

Micro round.

[C]

Both teams prepared in advance for this challenge called I'd like to thank the Academy. We asked team Unicorn and Team Dragon to both write an acceptance speech for an award received by their side. All the details, including what the award is for, are totally up to them. So get ready to hear some name dropping, some happy tears, and a whole lot of humble brags. Katie went first in round one. So, Sandon, you're up. We'd like to invite team Unicorn to the stage.

[A]

And now, the award for the thing.

[B]

That'S inspired the greatest works of art.

[A]

And culture, this year's Musi is the unicorn. Seriously? Wow. I'm just so honored. It seems like only yesterday I was a magical little pony with a horn, a horn and a dream. First off, thanks to all the ancient manuscripts and paintings inspired by me. Shout out to the spectacular woven art known as the unicorn. Tapestries made in the middle ages but still on display today in New York because, hey, great art never dies, right? And speaking of great art, thanks to all the TV shows, books, and movies featuring me, the last unicorn, she Ra, Harry Potter. Oh, and My Little Pony. Sup, my bronies. I see you. Thanks to all the people behind food trends like colorful unicorn toast and the unicorn frappuccino. Oh, and I can't forget all the blacklight poster makers, spray brush artists, and puffy sticker people. Thanks for using my likeness, like, all the time. I mean, I get it. Who else would use a dragon? You'd scare people to death. And finally, to my queen, my idol, my inspiration, Lisa Frank, your hyper colored rainbow pictures. Show the real me. This is for you. Dare to be yourself, everyone.

[B]

Thank you.

[C]

Oh, well, mazel tov, team Unicorn.

[A]

Thank you. This is gonna go on our trophy shelf with all our other trophies for being great.

[C]

All right, well, now it's Team Dragon's turn to hog the spotlight. Come on up to the podium, Katie.

[D]

All right, this will be read as the dragon, so I need to prepare my dragon voice.

[B]

Ooh, I'm excited.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Yes.

[D]

Enough applause. I get It. It's me, the dragon. Although you probably already knew that. With my dazzling wit and glittering hoard of treasure, who could ignore me? No one. Whether you're terrified of my mighty roar and fiery breath, or impressed with my ability to imbue you with good fortune, you've definitely heard of my words. Wrapping my serpentine body around all the greatest treasures of the world and also the fate of mankind. Who else could do it? When I was told I won the award for most beautiful mythological creature, I couldn't say I was surprised. Who is going to win? The Hydra? The Chimera? The Unicorn? That little weird headed horse? Don't make me laugh. Because when I laugh, I shoot fire from my lips. And you don't want the audience flobby, do you? A little dragon humor for you. Anyway, long story short, before they cut me off and I am forced to fly up to the A B booth and cut them in two, I am unsurprised. I'm a genius and a hero. You're welcome for even dating to Ta Ta. Much love. Goodbye from me, the dragon.

[C]

Oh my goodness.

[B]

Top tier.

[C]

What an accomplished bunch we have here. Award winners all around. But let's not forget, there's only one Smashboom Best today. So, Kobe, take a minute to think it over and mark down a point for this round. Okay, listeners. You two, did you decide? Kobe.

[B]

I will say I have made my decision.

[C]

Excellent.

[B]

Or not. Just kidding.

[D]

What? You got me.

[C]

Okay, now it's on to the shiftiest, the slyest of rounds.

[D]

Sneak Attack.

[C]

Our debaters have no idea what to expect from this round. And now it's time for the big reveal. Your Sneak Attack challenge is by any other name, so let's pretend the side you're arguing for didn't have a name. We'd like you to come up with three alternative names for that thing. For example, if you were arguing in favor of mountains, you might rename them, I don't know, dirt, mussels, or raised forests. Or how about megamounds? Got it. Yes.

[A]

Yeah. Okay, okay.

[C]

So we're give you a minute to brainstorm while we play some relaxing hold music. Unicorns prance, sparkle bright Even their poop is out of sight One horned magic are bidders of love Dragons soaring through the skies Breathing fire fearfully sublime Lucky lizards Better to keep them around. Okay, are you both ready to pitch us some new names for unicorns and dragons? I am. Katie, you are up first. Let's hear your substitutes for dragon.

[D]

Okay, I got three serpentine dream makers. Okay, that calls It.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Beautiful sky demons and fire yellers of the ozone lairs.

[C]

Oh, very good. Okay, so, Sandon, let's hear your alternates for unicorn.

[A]

Okay, we've got pretty pointy ponies, spear headed horses, and the magical mares of the forest.

[B]

The magical mares of the forest.

[D]

I like that because it could be a pun.

[C]

Okay, Coby, it is time to award a point for this sneak attack challenge. Who is the fastest on their feet or hooves?

[D]

Oh, my gosh.

[B]

Or talons?

[D]

This guy.

[C]

So think it over. Okay, listeners too award a point.

[B]

All right, I think I got it.

[C]

Excellent. Now, everything has been leading up to this last challenge designed to intimidate even the wittiest of wordsmiths. It's our debater's very last chance to woo our judge, Kobe, in six words or less. The final six. Sandon, you're up first this time. Let's hear you neigh your final six for team Unicorn.

[A]

All right, here we go. Always choose your one horned friend.

[C]

Okay. Okay, Team dragon, A final opportunity to burn your opponent's arguments to a crisp. Go for it, Katie.

[D]

Pockets of money, bellies of fire.

[C]

Well, there you have it.

[A]

You guys missed the snap and point. That came to the end of that visual for everybody.

[D]

Yeah, there are two finger guns at the end as well.

[C]

Well, both teams really brought it today. We've heard arguments based on history, science, lore, and pop culture. And now there's just one thing left to do. Koby, have you awarded your final point?

[B]

I think I have.

[C]

Okay, the moment has come. Listeners, feel free to pause to talk it over if you need to. Koby, which mythical creature is the winner?

[B]

Okay, after careful deliberation, trials and tribulation, dragons and unicorn nations, I have decided.

[D]

That.

[B]

Dragons are the winner.

[D]

Yay, Team Dragon.

[A]

I feel like I just got speared by a unicorn.

[D]

Team Dragon, we're burning all your arguments to the ground.

[C]

Oh, my goodness. Well, I think whichever side you were rooting for today, I think we can all agree that this was a nail biter.

[D]

I was literally biting my nails.

[A]

Well, Katie, that was really well argued. And you know what? Dragons are pretty impressive. I'm not gonna say I didn't. I wasn't swayed a little bit. You did some great point making there.

[D]

Uh, I love the pun. And secondly, I loved your arguments. I didn't know that unicorns could beat dragons. It was a great day for all of us. Thank you so much for introducing me to the majesty of an animal that I previously did not respect.

[A]

Look, here's the thing. I would love to see unicorns and dragons together. I mean, honestly, I'd hang out with them over people almost any day.

[D]

I mean, definitely, definitely over. I could give you a list of people I would agree to never see again if I could hang out with a dragon and a unicorn at the same time.

[A]

All I'm saying is that, like, honestly.

[C]

They'Re both awesome, but Kobe crowned dragons the smashboom Best today. But what do you think, listeners?

[B]

Dragons are clearly the best, but maybe you feel differently either way. Head to our website, smashboom.org and vote. Agree to disagree.

[C]

Well, that's a wrap on this whimsical word wrangle. Smashboom Best is brought to you by Brains on and American Public Media.

[D]

It's produced by Mark Sanchez, Sandon Totten, Molly Bloom, Alyssa Dudley, and Rosie Dupont.

[A]

We had engineering help from Corey Shrupel and Parker McDaniels, and we had production.

[D]

Help from Mason Wilhelm, Christina Lopez, and.

[C]

Lauren D. Brenna Everson is the voice of our hold music, and our announcer is Marlee Feuer. Worker Otto. We want to give a special thanks to Justin Koo, Eric Ringham, Marceline Mosher, Sam Chu, Ewan Kerr, Taylor Kaufman, Mike Rowe, Chrissy Pease, Chip Walton, Austin Cross, and Joanne Griffith. Katie, is there anyone you want to give a shout out to today?

[D]

I'd love to give a shout out to sand and Totten. And I would also love to give a shout out to Echo Bark, my local pet store that had a dragon toy that I bought for my dog that kept me inspired the entire time I wrote this.

[C]

And how about you, Sandon?

[A]

I would also like to give a shout out to Katie McVeigh for being a fierce opponent and my local public library, which lent me a book on unicorns from which I based many of my arguments.

[C]

Kobe, do you want to give any special thanks?

[B]

I would probably like to thank everyone involved in the show or I would like to thank everyone involved in this show for letting me come on. I'd like to thank my mom. She makes great cashew brittle and great music.

[D]

Awesome.

[C]

And before we sign off, let's hear some more from Sully. Remember, he suggested a skateboarding versus roller skating matchup. Here's who he thinks would win.

[D]

And I think skateboarding would win because they can do more tricks, and I just think it's cool. Bye.

[C]

Thank you, Sully. And if you've dreamed up the best debate idea ever, we want to hear about it. You can share your idea or just say [e-mail] we love hearing from you. We'll be back soon with another debate battle. See you later.

[D]

See you later.

[A]

Goodbye.

[C]

Better than the rest. It's magical West. It's magical West.

[D]

If a unicorn lives in Russia, how does he even have his horn out? It's cold there. Does he put a hat on it? Answer me these questions.

[A]

If they're impervious to fire, they're impervious to cold.

[D]

That isn't that omen. That has not been verified.