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Olivia Sui
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Ian Hecox
Ramble. Well, hello everyone. A happy new year from the Smoshcast guys. Since it's now 2020, I figure why not, why don't we just talk about 2019 for a second. This was our first year ever doing a podcast. We did 44 episodes in total. I guess we have maybe around 3,000 minutes of audio or 50 hours of us just talking about. Absolutely not. And I just want to say thank you guys so much for being there through all this nonsense. The podcast has been really fun to do it. Learned a lot about each other. I hope that you guys learned a little something about us and something about the world. Let's take this moment to look back at some of our favorite moments from the first year of the Smosh cast. We'll start at the very beginning and work our way through chronologically. So this first clip that I want to show you guys is Courtney, myself, and Damian, and we're talking about sexuality. And Courtney has a little surprise for us.
- [01:42]
Olivia Sui
Lilly saying, she tweeted and it's kind of the same thing. It's like you said with John Wayne, you're like, oh, what do you think? A 1970s cowboy. Of course he had that kind of opinion type thing. Lilly Singh tweeted, I'm a woman, I'm colored, I'm bisexual, and these are my powers. And apparently that was her coming out for me. It was like we been knew. Like, I thought I was like, wait, I thought everybody knew that we been new. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I thought it was a thing.
- [02:13]
Ian Hecox
I mean, you can never assume and, you know, you never want to.
- [02:16]
Olivia Sui
True.
- [02:17]
Ian Hecox
And obviously that's one other thing. You never want to out somebody, of course, unless they've clearly outed themselves.
- [02:24]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [02:24]
Ian Hecox
Especially if you get it wrong.
- [02:26]
Olivia Sui
Yeah, yeah. Imagine if I tweeted like, yeah, like, you know how Lilly sings bisexual and she like, didn't even say anything like that. That would not be good.
- [02:33]
Courtney Miller
A World of oops.
- [02:34]
Olivia Sui
Yeah, yeah.
- [02:35]
Courtney Miller
Big old basket of whoopsie daisies.
- [02:36]
Ian Hecox
I think it's. That's super important. It's not just. It's not just like, sexuality, but also people that struggle with mental health. Mental health.
- [02:43]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [02:44]
Ian Hecox
People that struggle.
- [02:45]
Olivia Sui
Normalizing those things is so important. And like, that's. That's the thing too. Like, I am not straight. That's something that I only recently started working through, and I'm still kind of working through it. But it is something that I've felt is important for people to know because it's like, let's normalize. Like, it's so important to normalize things that people are insecure about. Like, I'm still a little insecure about, like, what exactly it is. Like, I remember when I. I didn't even realize it literally until a couple years ago when I started. Because I grew up in the Mormon Church, and when I was 12, I realized that Mormons hated a lot of them. Not. I won't generalize, but when Prop 8, the gay marriage, like, proposition was a thing, a lot of my friends in the Mormon Church were like, gays are bad. All this terrible thing. And I was like, whoa. And I. And I left the church at that point. Wasn't until I was 21 ish that I was like. I mean, all my life I'd kind of wondered. And like, the fact that I kept wondering, it wasn't like a naive, like, am I gay?
- [03:59]
Keith Leak Jr.
I don't know.
- [03:59]
Olivia Sui
It was definitely like, man, this is something that I need to relax and, like, think about. Because for so long I was like, yeah, I'm straight. That's what I am. Because that's what I thought I was supposed to be. But, like, there was so many conflicting things with that. I don't know if I'm biased, asexual, but because, like, that. That's kind of limiting to gender. Because I've definitely found people who are gender fluid, like, attractive. Just, I think. I don't know. Everybody's hot. I don't know, man.
- [04:27]
Courtney Miller
It's a spectrum.
- [04:29]
Olivia Sui
And I remember the first people I told were it was definitely Matt Robb and Joe Beretta were there. It was a defy media Christmas party.
- [04:39]
Keith Leak Jr.
Whoa.
- [04:39]
Olivia Sui
And that was the first time I didn't know this.
- [04:42]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [04:43]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. That was the first time I said out loud that I don't think I'm straight and. Cause the longest time I was just thinking about it and kind of let those walls down that I'd had up for a long time. Sure, I'm Hot in the face right now.
- [04:57]
Courtney Miller
Well, I fully support everything you're saying. And I think the coolest thing is there might be a kid or anybody out there right now who really needs to hear this, especially coming from you.
- [05:06]
Olivia Sui
And it feels very much like a fluid thing. And I also. I think I have a weird type, too. Cause, okay, when I was a kid, my mom had a lot of drawing books and comic book books, including this Wonder Woman one that I always loved. I really loved the artwork and everything. And so, literally, a couple months ago, I messaged my mom, and I was like, hey, do you have that Wonder Woman book? That super old one? I'd love to add it to my collection. I have drawing books. I have a Guardians of the Galaxy book for my coffee table. And she sent it to me, and I'm going through it, and it's just really sexually charged drawings of women. And I was like, oh, okay. That's why I like looking at that. So basically, my type is Wonder Woman. Just.
- [05:50]
Ian Hecox
I mean, I think that's something we can all agree on.
- [05:52]
Keith Leak Jr.
Amen.
- [05:55]
Courtney Miller
Sorry, my knuckles are super dry.
- [05:56]
Olivia Sui
It's okay. Before fans get weird, I just, like. Something I realized throughout all this, just now, is like, Olivia and I have kissed in videos. Calm down. We definitely do those for yous. I'm not like, Olivia. Shipping Cortavia. Shipping is a fun thing, but, like, I'm not attracted to Olivia. I'm not attracted to any Mari, Sarah. Nobody. I like not. It's not like, oh, every girl is a potential for me. Like, it's. I mean, that's a general thing.
- [06:24]
Ian Hecox
It's the same thing.
- [06:24]
Olivia Sui
It's the same for all that.
- [06:26]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, I'm straight. Not every girl that I interact with, I have to date.
- [06:30]
Olivia Sui
Our first video together. Our first video together. Speed drawing. Like, people were immediately, since I was this new girl in a video, making sexual comments, like, it's just. It's just what happens. But, yeah, I just wanted to disclose that, like, olivia, love you. I'll kiss you any day you need. But, like, I'm not into you like that. Sorry, babe. Like, for sure.
- [06:48]
Courtney Miller
But, yeah, well, I applaud you for talking about this. I really do. Because I think, like, you said, whatever the thing is, whether it's. Whether it's mental health, whether it's sexuality, whether it's gender, whether it's anything, like, things are only quote, unquote, weird because we don't talk about them. That's why, when I get the opportunity, I talk about mental health stuff all the time. Anxiety, panic, Attacks, paranoia, like, all that good stuff. I deal with that. I do. And it's only weird because it's not talked about. And that's. It's not your job to talk about it necessarily. But I think you have done and can do a lot of good. Because there's someone out there right now who's just probably bawling, being like, oh, my God, that's me. And it's okay. I'm proud of you.
- [07:31]
Olivia Sui
It's so important.
- [07:31]
Ian Hecox
And I think you bring up a good point where you said, I don't know what I am. And that's okay.
- [07:37]
Courtney Miller
That's okay.
- [07:37]
Ian Hecox
Because I think people feel such a need to adhere themselves to a specific identity that they might not actually completely.
- [07:45]
Olivia Sui
People need to label things and feel secure.
- [07:49]
Ian Hecox
But, like, we should probably stop doing that so much completely. But I think that there is some safety in that, in saying, I don't know, but I'm figuring it out. And especially, like, young people, like, yeah, everybody's had the thought before. Like, am I?
- [08:03]
Olivia Sui
Yeah, everyone wonders, what is this? You know, I didn't know what anxiety was until, like, 16 because it's not something that was talked about. And I wasn't on the Internet that much at that time. It's like, you gotta talk about that stuff. People need to know.
- [08:18]
Courtney Miller
I was diagnosed OCD two years ago, and I had no idea that what I was experiencing was ocd, because I just took that as like, I've gotta organize stuff and check this doorknob six times. That is ocd. And it's just like, oh, no. It's the way my mind works and how I deal with things, which leads to anxiety. Yada, yada, yada. And I've got to say, you know, even though this doesn't have to do with sexuality, I can understand the comfort in finding a label. You know, even if it's better to maybe not label so you can, like, figure things out, you know, finding out that I had a word for what I was feeling, I could be like, ah, I have ocd.
- [08:50]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [08:51]
Courtney Miller
The same way with someone who goes like, I'm bi. Got it. Check done.
- [08:54]
Olivia Sui
Like, you know, I definitely. Like, the most secure way to say it for me is just being like, oh, yeah, I'm not straight. Like, that's just because. And I could be pansexual. It could just be bisexual. I don't know, whatever. But, like, I just realized in these last couple years, and it was like, right as I was in a new relationship that I was like, wow. And, like, I remember I was coming out to certain people, but, like, my stomach growled just so loud. I hope you all heard that.
- [09:22]
Shane Topp
I did not hear that.
- [09:24]
Olivia Sui
Some people. I didn't go about it the right way. Like, I thought people knew already and they'd be like, oh, I didn't know that. And like, I definitely had some people that probably got upset when they found out. Like, there's. And you never. You'll never really know who's tolerant of that stuff. Like, there's. I didn't know that I had a homophobic person in my friend circle. Like, you don't. You'll never know. And sometimes, yeah, you'll just. You will never find that out. But, yeah, it's crazy, man. It's been a journey.
- [09:51]
Courtney Miller
Sometimes people need time to, like, you know, maybe if they were like, I don't know. But like, I think I said this in my stream recently. Somebody was just like, I came out to some friends and my best friend won't talk to me now. And I said, like, unfortunately, try your best to be the bigger person and forgive them for yourself for now. To try to, like, save yourself a lot of grief because they might not have never actually been exposed to anybody that they knew was gay before. And then once they do some thinking, they'll be like, oh, that person is still that person. Holy crap. And so then two weeks later in the stream, they're like, yo, my best friend reached out and apologized and now we're hanging out again. And it's just like, well, there you go.
- [10:29]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. And that person that was upset when they found out, they didn't. They didn't tell me they were upset. I could just very much tell. And then they basically told me that they were homophobic later. But there's still in my life, I think it's okay to have people around. Like, don't just keep people with the same opinions as you. I mean, it's good to have those people, but it's also good. I mean, homophobia is a terrible thing.
- [10:48]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, that's. That's not an opinion we really. We really welcome around these parts.
- [10:52]
Olivia Sui
No, no, and just be tolerant, be accepting, whatever. Like, not whatever, but you know what I mean, that person's still in my life. I don't hate them. It's, you know, like, we are all here on our own path, so.
- [11:06]
Ian Hecox
Yeah. Well, thank you so much for sharing that, Courtney. That takes a lot. And I think, you know, for some of the people listening, I think that's something that needs to be heard. I'm always a big supporter of, you know, getting these sort of problems out here. And that's what podcasts are really good for, because, you know, everyone's struggling with something, and it's nice to hear that. That other people have these things going on with. With my ex, Pam, she was a. She was a cancer survivor, and she always kept it secret.
- [11:45]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [11:47]
Ian Hecox
And when we were together, I told her, like, this is. This is. You could help people by talking about it. Raising awareness.
- [11:53]
Keith Leak Jr.
Totally.
- [11:54]
Ian Hecox
And when she had her sort of last scare, she then started talking about it more and talking about it more and being more involved in the community, and it really helps people. What a sweet, sweet clip. Okay, so this next one is episode five, where it's Courtney, myself, and Matpat from the Game Theorists. And Matpat brings up one of the worst ideas that was ever pitched to Smosh back in the Defy days. Enjoy.
- [12:28]
Olivia Sui
So did you have a hand in, like, the strategy at all or, like, when we brought in. I just want to know in depth.
- [12:36]
Damien Haas
A little bit more my secret role behind the scenes.
- [12:39]
Olivia Sui
I know you're the agent. Cody Banks of Defy. Sorry, I'm getting the weirdest, oldest, most.
- [12:46]
Damien Haas
These pop culture references are golden right now.
- [12:49]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah.
- [12:50]
Damien Haas
No, I mean, it's interesting, and it's funny to hear Ian talk about, like, Defy, like, the higher ups that defy. Wanting to fast forward that process and.
- [12:57]
Olivia Sui
Kind of, like, just jam it down their throats.
- [12:59]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [12:59]
Damien Haas
Shoehorn it in as quickly as possible. Because this was the same group of people who are also promoting the idea of doing Black Smosh.
- [13:06]
Olivia Sui
Oh, yeah.
- [13:07]
Damien Haas
Like, unironically wanting to do Black Smosh.
- [13:13]
Ian Hecox
Yep.
- [13:13]
Damien Haas
Which I. Which I wasn't sure. Like, had you had those conversations with the team, clearly, based on your reaction.
- [13:19]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, there was somebody. There was somebody higher up. I'm not gonna say their name. For many years. For many years, one of their. One of their dream projects was to create Black Smosh, which what they wanted to do was cast a group of black people to create, shall we say, urban comedy. They were like, well, you know, there's this whole other audience out there, so we just need to create Black smoke.
- [13:47]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [13:47]
Damien Haas
I mean, basically, the thought process of this person in the meetings that we were having was, well, we have this back catalog of funny scripts, so if we just, you know, change out the two white dudes for different demographics, we have tons of new verticals, and basically you reuse the same scripts, but just kind of, like, mix it up a little bit. And it was. And. And it was. His first spin off was Always gonna be Black smosh followed by, you know, female smosh. Gay smash. Like it was bad. Yeah, yeah, that's like that, that is, that is truly spilling the tea every.
- [14:23]
Ian Hecox
Every time they brought it up. And that's really funny. I've never mentioned, I've never mentioned the whole black smosh thing.
- [14:30]
Damien Haas
Probably smart of you to not mention.
- [14:33]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, but every time they brought it up, it was just like, no, no.
- [14:37]
Olivia Sui
And not. And here's another weird fricking reference, Hairspray. How there's like Negro Day on the dancing show. Like that says it. And I'm sorry, that's rough. But like that's. It's just that I get that vibe when I hear about what they were trying to do.
- [14:50]
Damien Haas
Well, and the thing was, you know, the first time. Cause again, I'm this young guy who, you know, has only been working at this company for about a year, but I'm like the guy who understands YouTube. I'm the guy who's been able to build up my own channel in the background. Like, I was the representative of like the digital video ecosystem and optimization.
- [15:09]
Shane Topp
Right?
- [15:10]
Damien Haas
And so I'm in these rooms with all these traditional media guys who had been working in TV for years and had, you know, decent levels of success there. You know, suddenly now, like, let's figure out ways to capitalize off of these, these brands that we have and this and that. And he tosses out this idea. And at first, like, everyone, you know, me and a couple other people in the room are like, haha, that's, you know, that's an idea. But really. But they were so serious about it was the thing, like they legitimately thought that there was no problem with it and that it was totally fine. And of course at that point the conversation fundamentally shifts to like, oh no, you're taking the like, absolutely not. Do not do this. This is horrific for so many reasons.
- [15:54]
Olivia Sui
Were they wanting to call it that? Like actually.
- [15:56]
Ian Hecox
Well, that was always just the sort of working title. Yeah, the working title. And by the way, there's nothing wrong with, you know, to two black dudes doing comedy. Obviously. Key and Peele was probably one of the greatest sketch shows ever made, but it wasn't for the sake of representation. It was for the sake of, of like, let's just get this other thing going to appeal to this other group. Because we don't believe that two white guys are gonna be enjoyed by black people.
- [16:30]
Damien Haas
This is actually why I'm shocked to hear that you also know this because to me, when that was brought up in the room. I'm like, this is unbelievable. I can't believe that someone would actually legitimately think of this as an idea. And so now to hear that it was also brought up to you and you also had to shoot it down.
- [16:48]
Ian Hecox
Yeah. Multiple times.
- [16:49]
Damien Haas
It's unbelievable to me.
- [16:51]
Ian Hecox
Yeah. It kind of became a running joke about this person because it's just ludicrous.
- [17:01]
Damien Haas
Right.
- [17:02]
Ian Hecox
It doesn't make any sense.
- [17:04]
Shane Topp
Amazing.
- [17:05]
Damien Haas
So there you go.
- [17:06]
Shane Topp
The.
- [17:06]
Damien Haas
I do remember the other joke that he would toss out when it came to, like, some of the other verticals and obviously bringing up like gay smosh. LGBT smosh. Because that's a whole new community. The joke was, though, that they already had gay smosh because you and Anthony were already host.
- [17:20]
Olivia Sui
Anthony, baby.
- [17:22]
Damien Haas
Did they. Did they toss that joke. Joke your way?
- [17:25]
Ian Hecox
Probably.
- [17:25]
Damien Haas
Okay.
- [17:26]
Ian Hecox
There was like. There was like another.
- [17:28]
Damien Haas
Just so we have full transparency here of what was being said behind the scenes.
- [17:31]
Ian Hecox
Yes. Yeah.
- [17:32]
Olivia Sui
Oh my gosh.
- [17:33]
Ian Hecox
I mean, you got to keep those fan fictions going.
- [17:35]
Damien Haas
Sure.
- [17:37]
Courtney Miller
It is Ryan here. And I have a question for you. What do you do when you win? Like, are you a fist pumper?
- [17:44]
Ian Hecox
A woohooer? A hand clapper, A high fiver?
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Courtney Miller
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Ian Hecox
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Courtney Miller
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- [18:02]
Shane Topp
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- [18:07]
Ian Hecox
So this next clip comes from episode 10 and it's with myself, Shane, and our writer Monica. And they discuss a scrapped idea called Tinder for Hot Dogs. Enjoy.
- [18:23]
Shane Topp
Monica had a few pitches. She was like, this sketch. This sketch and Tinder for hot dogs was an idea I had. And I just go, yes.
- [18:29]
Noah Grossman
Shane was all in. So I was like, this is obviously a great idea and viable.
- [18:35]
Ian Hecox
Yeah.
- [18:36]
Noah Grossman
So, yeah, so then I pitched it at a pitch meeting and no one gave it the respect it deserved.
- [18:42]
Ian Hecox
Well, hold on. I'm pretty sure I said something akin to yes.
- [18:46]
Shane Topp
I mean, dude, Tinder. Come on. First of all, beyond a sketch, it's a good idea. It's just a genuinely good product. You want a hot dog, but there's many types of hot dogs. But the world, our economy, doesn't cater to differentiating between hot dog tastes.
- [19:02]
Noah Grossman
Right.
- [19:03]
Ian Hecox
And for being like.
- [19:04]
Noah Grossman
For hot dogs being such an American food, we don't put it in the spotlight enough.
- [19:09]
Shane Topp
We really don't.
- [19:09]
Ian Hecox
It's true. It's like sometimes you're in the mood for a Nathan's. Sometimes you're in the mood for a Hebrew National.
- [19:14]
Shane Topp
But see, you're talking about different brands. We're going beyond that. See Tinder for Hot Dogs. From the simplicity of an app on your phone.
- [19:22]
Ian Hecox
Go on.
- [19:23]
Shane Topp
You're getting like, do you want a bratwurst? Do you want beef? Do you want turkey? These are all the different types of dogs.
- [19:30]
Noah Grossman
What flavor profile do you want?
- [19:31]
Shane Topp
Flavor profile. What sauces do you want? You know, and the type of buns you get. Oh, my God. At the extremes, you know?
- [19:38]
Noah Grossman
And you want to know that it's close by. Like, I want to know that I don't have to travel more than once.
- [19:43]
Shane Topp
Yeah, you want to see how close. And you can specify in your bio. It's like dogs under 6 inches. Swipe, swipe, swipe, left. Really specific with it. This podcast is brought to you by Tinder for Hot Dogs. No, it's great. It's a great idea. It's funny, but it's also good.
- [20:04]
Noah Grossman
I have to admit. I tried to write it. I got nowhere. I think ryanfinity left me an hour to write it and I tried so hard. I got six lines in and I was like, I'm just gonna work on something else. Cause I hate this.
- [20:19]
Ian Hecox
While I'm working on it, hand me the reins and I'll give you an autobiography on Tinder for Hot Dogs.
- [20:27]
Shane Topp
You're gonna write Tinder for Hot Dogs? Is that what you're saying right here?
- [20:30]
Noah Grossman
But an autobiography. So from the point of view of Dinner for Hot Dogs, I don't know.
- [20:34]
Ian Hecox
What I was going. I'll give you a book the size of the Odyssey for Tinder for Hot Dogs.
- [20:40]
Shane Topp
You know what I think? I think if enough listeners give us a five star review with the review saying, make Tinder for Hot Dogs, then we're gonna have to make Tinder for Hot Dogs. If we get enough.
- [20:52]
Noah Grossman
Give me those dogs.
- [20:53]
Shane Topp
We get enough. 5 star reviews on this podcast.
- [20:56]
Ian Hecox
And if you guys go to the YouTube and like it and subscribe.
- [21:00]
Shane Topp
Yes.
- [21:01]
Ian Hecox
If we get 50,000 likes on YouTube on this, on the SmoshCast YouTube video.
- [21:09]
Shane Topp
About this, we'll make Tinder for Hot Dogs.
- [21:11]
Ian Hecox
We'll make Tinder for Hot Dogs.
- [21:13]
Shane Topp
Make my dreams come true.
- [21:15]
Noah Grossman
Please, somebody do something for Shane for once.
- [21:18]
Shane Topp
I can't stress. I can't stress how much I want Tinder for Hot Dogs made. And this is the only way that it's gonna get made, guys. You have to. You all have to come out in droves and support this podcast in every way possible on YouTube, on. On Spotify, on itunes. In every way. And Tinder Hot dog. Tinder for hot dogs will. Will come to fruition.
- [21:45]
Noah Grossman
Make it happen.
- [21:45]
Ian Hecox
Make it.
- [21:46]
Shane Topp
Make it happen, guys, please.
- [21:50]
Ian Hecox
So, yeah, so then eventually, we did create the Tender for Hot Dogs video. It was a video that we enjoyed making very much. It was very silly. Damien sings in it. It's pretty great. This next clip comes from episode 13 with myself, Shane, and Courtney. And this is when I started sort of the meme of me wanting to date Courtney's sister. I found that it makes Courtney extremely uncomfortable, so I decided to dig in further because I am an annoying person like that. Enjoy.
- [22:27]
Olivia Sui
I'm a working woman, and, like, I don't need partner. No man. I don't need no man. I mean.
- [22:33]
Ian Hecox
Cause poor woman.
- [22:35]
Olivia Sui
It's pretty cool. I was actually out with my sister last night. I was telling her about that. She, like, took my hand, and she was like, I'm really proud of you.
- [22:40]
Ian Hecox
Aw, that's great.
- [22:41]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. Cause it's not what it's all about.
- [22:43]
Ian Hecox
You know, the sister that you're gonna hook me up with on a date.
- [22:49]
Shane Topp
Wow. Wow.
- [22:51]
Ian Hecox
We've been. We've been.
- [22:57]
Shane Topp
It's a. It's a.
- [22:58]
Ian Hecox
We've been bothering Courtney.
- [22:59]
Shane Topp
It's a joke.
- [23:00]
Olivia Sui
It's a joke.
- [23:01]
Ian Hecox
Sure it is, dude.
- [23:04]
Olivia Sui
Let me. Let me tell it at least. Okay, so we're all single. La dee dah. But Ian's been like. Can I say slang and dong.
- [23:12]
Ian Hecox
No, but you haven't slangin. Dong.
- [23:13]
Olivia Sui
You're not.
- [23:14]
Ian Hecox
No. Dong has been slang.
- [23:16]
Shane Topp
Ian has not slayed a single dong.
- [23:19]
Ian Hecox
How dare. Guys. How dare you appropriate my word and then use it.
- [23:26]
Olivia Sui
Falsely.
- [23:26]
Shane Topp
How dare you claim ice slaying dong.
- [23:29]
Olivia Sui
Well, he's been dating. He's been in the dating pool and, you know, going on dates.
- [23:35]
Ian Hecox
I've been following leads, but I haven't. I haven't really been.
- [23:38]
Olivia Sui
Oh, my God.
- [23:40]
Ian Hecox
I haven't been.
- [23:41]
Olivia Sui
Is this how you pursue women?
- [23:43]
Ian Hecox
Successfully dating a suspect? I guess I'm like, that's. I think that's an I'm suspect. Aha.
- [23:51]
Shane Topp
I'd like to take you out to dinner for questioning.
- [23:53]
Olivia Sui
I'd like some evidence that we might be compatible.
- [23:56]
Ian Hecox
I mean. Yeah, that's. That's kind of how. How it's been.
- [24:00]
Olivia Sui
Well, anyway, he's. So that's what. He's been following leads of suspecting women, and we were Having a conversation the other day of like, oh, who can we set him up with? And I made a joke that my older sister was recently. She's newly single, but they would not work.
- [24:17]
Ian Hecox
Why?
- [24:19]
Olivia Sui
This is weird for me, but it's.
- [24:22]
Ian Hecox
Not about you, Courtney. It's about my happiness and your sister's happiness.
- [24:26]
Shane Topp
That's right, Courtney.
- [24:28]
Olivia Sui
Dude.
- [24:31]
Shane Topp
Oh my God, this is so awkward.
- [24:34]
Olivia Sui
I don't know what to say.
- [24:36]
Ian Hecox
Look, your sister and I are the same age, roughly. We both live near each other. So that's great for la, dude.
- [24:45]
Shane Topp
Boy, you live close to each other. Well, I guess it's Max evidence.
- [24:50]
Olivia Sui
That is a lead.
- [24:51]
Ian Hecox
We have a lead in la. If you live close to somebody that's like, that's half of the relationship.
- [24:56]
Shane Topp
Yeah. Oh man. I've definitely ended. I've definitely. I ended a thing once. Cuz it was just too far away.
- [25:03]
Ian Hecox
You're like, ah, you're in Santa Monica.
- [25:05]
Shane Topp
It was literally like we were, we were a solid like 20 miles away. And like in any other state that'd be fine. But it got to a point where I was like, I am. This is crushing me. Like my back hurts from driving so much.
- [25:19]
Ian Hecox
You get to their house and you just fall asleep on their bed.
- [25:22]
Shane Topp
I was like, I'm just like, I'm exhausted every time we hang out. Like, I can't do this. And also like, it just wasn't ha. Like there was more reasons obviously, but it wasn't.
- [25:30]
Ian Hecox
But it's mostly the distance.
- [25:32]
Shane Topp
If she had lived closer, I would have been like, I'll give this more of a shot.
- [25:34]
Ian Hecox
I mean, the weird thing is 20 miles, if you're coming from Los Angeles, that's a long distance relationship.
- [25:41]
Shane Topp
Yeah. Essentially is. Cuz it's over an hour to like.
- [25:43]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [25:44]
Shane Topp
Get to each other. That's awful.
- [25:46]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. No, I'm not gonna have you date an older version of myself. Sorry, dude.
- [25:49]
Ian Hecox
But she's not. She's not like I've met her before. She's not like, you know, we're very.
- [25:56]
Olivia Sui
Different, but I feel like she's. I don't know, you guys.
- [26:00]
Shane Topp
Hold on, hold on. Does she have a Keurig?
- [26:03]
Ian Hecox
Does she have a Keurig?
- [26:04]
Shane Topp
Does she have a Keurig?
- [26:04]
Ian Hecox
Does she drink coffee?
- [26:06]
Olivia Sui
I don't think she has a Keurig.
- [26:07]
Shane Topp
Oh, no. But she's nothing like you.
- [26:09]
Olivia Sui
That's another lead, Ian.
- [26:11]
Ian Hecox
That's another thing. What do you guys, what do you guys think at home? What should. Should Courtney set it up?
- [26:18]
Olivia Sui
No, no, I talked, I talked to Carrie about it. And she was like. She's like. No.
- [26:27]
Ian Hecox
But is she just saying that for your sake or.
- [26:31]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [26:32]
Olivia Sui
You know, did she say.
- [26:33]
Ian Hecox
Did she say ew?
- [26:35]
Olivia Sui
No, she didn't say ew. Carrie, I'm so sorry.
- [26:41]
Ian Hecox
Does she listen to this?
- [26:43]
Olivia Sui
Maybe sometimes if I'm on it.
- [26:48]
Shane Topp
My family only listens if I'm not on it.
- [26:50]
Ian Hecox
Does your dad. Does your dad listen to this podcast or.
- [26:53]
Olivia Sui
He watches it.
- [26:54]
Ian Hecox
Do you think he would approve?
- [26:57]
Olivia Sui
I don't know, man.
- [26:58]
Shane Topp
Yeah. Before you even start dating, can you get your father's blessing for Ian?
- [27:03]
Olivia Sui
Yeah, you know what? Get it out of the way if you wanna. Sure. Ian, go for it. Shoot your shot. I dare you. No, no, in person. You don't do it.
- [27:14]
Ian Hecox
I'm addressing him on the podcast.
- [27:16]
Olivia Sui
Sorry, dad. Mr. Miller, say your condolences for the robbery.
- [27:23]
Ian Hecox
My condolences for the robbery. Um, may I have your daughter's hand in marriage?
- [27:34]
Olivia Sui
Oh, my God.
- [27:36]
Ian Hecox
Z cuts straight to the point. I'm done waiting.
- [27:38]
Shane Topp
That's smart.
- [27:38]
Ian Hecox
I'm ready. I'm ready to commit.
- [27:40]
Shane Topp
Kicking it old school.
- [27:41]
Olivia Sui
Oh, my God.
- [27:43]
Shane Topp
Dang.
- [27:43]
Olivia Sui
Could you imagine what my. I just, like.
- [27:47]
Ian Hecox
All I could think about right now is the wonderful Thanksgiving dinner we would all have. I'd come to your house, and we'd all just have a lovely dinner together. We'd share stories, you know, talk about the time your sister and I went to Cozumel.
- [28:04]
Olivia Sui
Oh, my God.
- [28:06]
Ian Hecox
Pina coladas by the. By the beach.
- [28:09]
Olivia Sui
Guys.
- [28:12]
Shane Topp
Go on.
- [28:14]
Ian Hecox
That's it. We only took one trip.
- [28:15]
Courtney Miller
Oh, yeah.
- [28:16]
Shane Topp
This is early on.
- [28:17]
Ian Hecox
Yeah.
- [28:17]
Shane Topp
I mean, this is only, what, seven months in.
- [28:19]
Ian Hecox
Well, we're talking about this Thanksgiving.
- [28:21]
Shane Topp
Yeah, this thing.
- [28:21]
Ian Hecox
So we're only like, a few months into.
- [28:23]
Shane Topp
Yeah, only a few months in. So one trip to Cozumel at that point is. Is fair.
- [28:27]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, it's enough.
- [28:28]
Shane Topp
Yeah. But Paris next year.
- [28:31]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, that's probably where I'll propose.
- [28:33]
Shane Topp
Yeah. You'd propose there, right?
- [28:34]
Ian Hecox
At the Eiffel Tower?
- [28:35]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [28:36]
Olivia Sui
You already got my dad's blessing, apparently.
- [28:38]
Ian Hecox
Mm.
- [28:38]
Shane Topp
Yeah, it's great. Wow. It's been really. It's been awesome. Love this. Really sweet.
- [28:47]
Olivia Sui
I just don't know what to say. What if Terry came on the podcast?
- [28:51]
Shane Topp
Oh, my God.
- [28:53]
Olivia Sui
Oh, my God.
- [28:56]
Ian Hecox
Okay, this next clip. Gosh, this is going to get emotional. This is episode 14 where I bring my ex girlfriend on the podcast. Mari is our mediator. I believe this clip is just us talking about our relationship and the failings and what led to us breaking up. So this one's. This one's pretty Emotional.
- [29:27]
Noah Grossman
You'Re committed to this relationship.
- [29:28]
Ian Hecox
You're.
- [29:29]
Noah Grossman
You, You've been in this relationship for a year and a half. Things start to happen. How does that, how did that make you feel, Ian? Like, how does that take a toll on you? Because you're not expecting this. And in, in so many ways, when we started a relationship, it's like, that is the last thing you think that you're signing up for.
- [29:45]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, I mean, I think one of the, one of the signs for me that I felt like, you know, this, this was like a real, a real, real relationship, but there was real, real feelings was the fact that, you know, Pam told me that she had a, she had a risk of cancer and that she had a history of cancer before we even started legitimately dating. So that was sort of my out. That was like, here's the door if you're not about this. Like, you know, Pam was like, straight up, she's like, you know, you might have to live with the fact that I might die at an early age. And it didn't really bother me. I mean, obviously, the thought of her dying. The thought of her dying greatly bothered me, but it didn't scare me away.
- [30:36]
Noah Grossman
Right. You're like, I can take this on.
- [30:38]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, it didn't, didn't. Yeah, that didn't. To me, that wasn't a reason to end things.
- [30:45]
H
Yeah.
- [30:46]
Ian Hecox
And at that time, Pam hadn't told anybody really, about, about her history of cancer. You literally told your, your past boyfriend, like, whoever you were in a relationship with when you were, when you were going through that, but you didn't tell your parents. Didn't tell my parents, you didn't tell anybody. Nobody on the Internet knew. Like, a couple friends knew and you told me. And, and that kind of openness like, really created this sort of connection between us, I feel.
- [31:17]
H
Well, and also, too, like, you were talking about when, when I told you about that, and you thought about, like, there's a chance that this could happen. There's this thing where you try to imagine scenarios like you try to imagine your significant other dying. And like, the way that it plays out in your head is never how it's going to play out in real life. So I feel that although, like, I can, I can handle this, when it actually started happening, there was, there was something to it that was not necessarily missing, but it just hit you harder than you thought it would because, you know, a good portion of the, the reason that I, I, you know, ended the relationship is because I couldn't deal with someone not being emotionally Supportive for me while I was in the hospital. Like, I mean, I don't want to go into detail because, you know, I still believe that you're a very good person. But, you know, at the time, it was just. I wasn't as important, and that's what it felt like.
- [32:14]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, that was. That was the thing, I think the. And we can. We can either get to that now or we can get to that later. But, I mean, the sort of straw. The straw that broke the camel's back was I was set to go on a business trip, and I was only gonna be gone for two, three days. The night before I left, you started feeling abdominal pain. And we had been through this before, and, you know, I was always there at the hospital as much as I could be. And it was. At this point, it kind of. It was almost routine, right?
- [32:48]
H
Yeah.
- [32:49]
Ian Hecox
And so it was like, okay, no problem. I'm gonna go on this trip, and, you know, whatever will happen will happen. It's probably the same exact thing as it was before. And I'll be right back. And I'll be there, and I'll be there for you. But you clearly had different needs for how you see a relationship being and how you see the person being there for you, and I wasn't there for you as much as you needed me to be in those situations.
- [33:20]
H
Do you think that one of the reasons that you weren't there as much is because it bothered you? Like, the pain and the. The suffering, like, bothered you so much to the point that you couldn't tolerate being or not tolerate, but it just. You were uncomfortable being around when it was happening because it hurt so much, or is it like one of those. I really. I haven't really broken down exactly why you weren't there. You know, like, what do you. I mean, maybe you don't have something to explain that with, but I just. Any insight would.
- [33:55]
Ian Hecox
I think, like I said, it just. It. It became almost like a routine. Like, you know, we had. We had been through it before. It didn't seem like it was anything new, so we kind of knew what the outcome would be if we figured it was another torsion. And it was. Right. But what ended up happening is that was. That was the final. That was the final one, right? No, no, there's one more.
- [34:19]
H
Yeah. Yeah, that's right.
- [34:20]
Ian Hecox
There's one more after. So. So, yeah, there was another torsion. I was out on my trip, and then I came back. I had to deal with some stuff at the office, and Ryan, who's our writer, is sitting behind the camera, was there that day, and he's like, you good? Pam's in the hospital. You should probably go, go see her. I was like, I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm gonna get over there. Like, I just, you know, I need to. I need to finish this and then, and then I'm gonna go. And the hospital is like. I mean, it was two miles away from the office.
- [35:00]
Noah Grossman
So it sounds like you run to your defense mechanism, which is running to work, because that, that, that's the thing that makes sense for you. It's almost like you're. It's like your safe place and it's a way to. To run away from things, which I totally get. I think it's one of the reasons why my schedule is like, packed to the brim. Because it's like, that's how I know that my life is like, like good. Like, you know, like it gives you some sort of security to know that it's there. And from the outside, that's what it sounds like. Because having to have to deal with it is just so difficult.
- [35:37]
Ian Hecox
And I think also, like, I was just. I'm very much an optimist and I've always. I was always an optimist in our relationship. Whenever she was, you know, worried about whatever. Whatever pain you were feeling, Pam, I was always just like, we don't know. We don't know until the doctors tell us.
- [35:54]
H
Yeah.
- [35:55]
Ian Hecox
Like. And, you know, you're like, you know, be, be prepared for, for loss. You know, I could, I could get this and I could be gone in a year or six months or, you know, one time you were diagnosed and they said you had a few months to live, so you, Your not.
- [36:13]
H
Not well. Oh, well, I mean, technically at the E.R. kinda. But my. That. The one that kinda. It was way before our relationship.
- [36:21]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, way before our relationship. So I mean, your, your sort of outlook on everything is very different from mine. You've obviously.
- [36:28]
H
I'd say I was a realist for my life. Not everybody's lives. Once you've had a life of just stuff is what I'm gonna call it, you become very aware that the good that you have is sometimes only fleeting and that bad stuff is around the corner. So maybe sort of a pessimist, but I'm still, I'm still a very positive person.
- [36:51]
Noah Grossman
You know, it's so interesting because from the outside, it really is like you guys are like reading two different books. Because I can totally see it, like from Pam's perspective, like, you've been through all this stuff, you know how hard it can be, and you see it from, like, a realist point of view. And so much emotion comes from that. When you're like, you just almost want to, like, you want it to be, like, romantic almost, where you're just like, this could be the last one, you know? Like, I just want to feel all those things, and then I can totally understand your perspective of just, like, no, no, no. Like, it. Maybe it's not that bad. Like, let's keep our head up and keep things positive. But to you, it feels like you're not being validated where it's like, you're going through all this stuff. Sorry. Yeah. Pam doesn't feel validated in what she's going through. When Ian is being the best person he knows he could be by just being optimistic. And it's like. It's interesting because we grew up with the saying, like, treat others the way you want to be treated. But I think as we grow older, we have to really understand that you have to treat the other person how they want to be treated. And it's like you guys were speaking your own languages as opposed to speaking each other's languages.
- [38:05]
Ian Hecox
That's very astute, Mari.
- [38:07]
Noah Grossman
Damn, we're getting deep in here, you guys. Are you ready?
- [38:11]
Ian Hecox
That's really good. Yeah. Yeah, that was a thing. That was it. Yeah, that was a good pod. I kind of. I forgot, like, how good of a pod that was. We were like, damn. Damn. Shake out real. This next one is episode 17. This is one that I did with Damien and Shane. We talked about how I screwed up the two Truths, One lie video that we did with Pam, my ex. And. Yeah, enjoy. This week is a little bit of a rough one because I had to give final approval of the two truths, one lie that I did with Pamela.
- [38:58]
Shane Topp
Right, Right.
- [38:59]
Ian Hecox
For those of you who don't know, Pamela being my ex girlfriend, and I thought it'd be such a hilarious idea to do two truths, one lie with her. And that video will be out by the time this podcast comes out. So if you haven't watched it, watch it right after you listen to all this.
- [39:13]
Courtney Miller
Can we speak freely about what happened?
- [39:15]
Ian Hecox
Yes. Yes. I thought it'd be hilarious. And I was like, okay, one of the great. One of the great lies that I'm gonna drop on her at the very end is that I cheated on her. And then obviously, that didn't happen, so that was gonna be the lie. Then something happened. I was obviously, like, very nervous during that part, and I was very excited And I had been waiting a long time to do this. Two truce. One lie. And it was. This was the moment. And she was. She was confusing me with her word jazz and. And whatever it's called English. Like, she was, like, saying things. I've had to watch it back, like, six times to understand where it all went wrong. But basically, I, for a moment, forgot how the game was played. And then she guessed that the lie was that I cheated on her.
- [40:08]
Courtney Miller
Which is correct.
- [40:09]
Ian Hecox
Which is correct. And so she's supposed to spray me. If she gets it right. I, for some reason, sprayed her, which then proceeded to. What then happened next was probably one of the worst moments in my life where I sprayed her. Then I realized, oh, shit, she thinks I cheated on her. And this is the moment that I reveal it to her. Spraying her in the face with water.
- [40:40]
Keith Leak Jr.
In public.
- [40:41]
Courtney Miller
On camera.
- [40:42]
Ian Hecox
On camera, in front of people.
- [40:44]
Shane Topp
And you were laugh. You were kind of like, laughing.
- [40:46]
Ian Hecox
Yeah.
- [40:46]
Shane Topp
As you did it.
- [40:47]
Courtney Miller
Gotcha.
- [40:48]
Ian Hecox
And, like, the moment the water, like, hit her face, I realized, like, looking at her reaction, I was like, wait, wait, she thinks I cheated. Oh, God. Oh, no. Oh, no. And, like. And you guys, Damien and Shane, like, you guys were in the peanut gallery, and I told you guys that I was gonna drop that.
- [41:07]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [41:07]
Ian Hecox
And so you guys knew you guys were ready for it. And you're like, what are you doing? You're playing the game wrong.
- [41:14]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [41:14]
Ian Hecox
What was. What was going.
- [41:16]
Courtney Miller
Some thoughts on it.
- [41:17]
Shane Topp
You kind of caught it. No. Yeah, I was gonna say you kind of caught what it might have. What might have caused his confusion.
- [41:21]
Courtney Miller
We rewatched it the other day to give, like, notes on it. And first of all, I will say, like, you didn't just come up with that idea out of the blue. Like, Olivia had one of the best two truths, one lies of all time with her boyfriend Sam, by dropping the bombshell of I'm pregnant, which was also the lie. But just that moment was great. So I think that inspired.
- [41:36]
Ian Hecox
Yes. I was like. I was like, oh, I'm gonna one up it.
- [41:39]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [41:40]
Shane Topp
And no matter what. And no matter what, we did know. Like, you did have to know, because it was same with Olivia by saying, oh, I cheated on you. We obviously know it's a lie, but there's still that moment of, like, there's the point.01% chance of, like, is he really willing to do this? Like, whatever. And so you could see that kind of.
- [41:58]
Courtney Miller
With her, that crazy of a man.
- [42:00]
Shane Topp
Because Pam goes like, oh, well, I definitely know you wouldn't reveal it. Like, this.
- [42:03]
Courtney Miller
So that's. That's the thing. So when we watched it again, we caught where the mix up happened. So it's two truths, one lie, right? So she's dissecting. Dissecting it after you say everything. It's, I prefer whatever type of peanut butter. I don't know, my mom's birthday and I cheated on you.
- [42:17]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [42:17]
Courtney Miller
So she says, well, I know you didn't cheat on me. That's for sure. And then she continues on. So if she really knew that she. She also playing the game correctly, should have said, like, that is for sure, the lie. But she says, I know you didn't cheat on me. So that. Okay, that one. And so she keeps going. And so you're thinking, all right, she's correct about that. True. So then next. And so the idea of true got switched up for both of y'all there. She's like, well, I know you didn't cheat on me, so let me go to the other ones. And then she kept dissecting them. And then that's when you were like, well, wait, so you're trying to find a lie? And she's like, oh, that's right. Well, I know you didn't cheat on me, so. Because that first switch happened for you in your mind when she revealed, like, okay, lie. You. You didn't cheat on me. And it's like, no, the lie is that I cheated on you, not that I didn't cheat on you. So it got reversed for both of you guys. It was just more visceral for her.
- [43:05]
Ian Hecox
It's also the most simple game in the universe. And this is the second time that I've messed it up, because I messed it up the last time I played it, I think. And so, and so, like, I sprayed her in the face. And then obviously she. She got very upset, which I completely understand. And. And then we. We had to. We had to cut the cameras for a moment and, you know, allow. Allow everyone to, like, settle down a little bit. And I'm like, that was a complete mess up. I didn't cheat on you. And this is not the reveal that I did on camera. And it was. It was the. It was the worst. It was the worst feeling ever. And I, you know, people. Everyone was very. Was very thoughtful afterwards, and everyone, you know, want to make sure we were okay. And I was. And they were like, are you all right? And I'm like, well, it turns out I really don't like hurting the people I care about.
- [44:00]
Courtney Miller
Yeah, I felt bad for you too. I felt bad for both of you. But I ran into you in the bathroom. I ran into you in the bathroom afterwards. I was like, hey, man, are you doing okay? And you're like, well, I'm worried about Pam. And I was like, yes. And I know that as well. You know, we all are. But, like, you know, obviously you didn't mean to do that. I'm worried about you too. And then Pam comes out of one of the restroom stalls and just says, am I in the wrong bathroom?
- [44:22]
Ian Hecox
Oh, yeah.
- [44:22]
Courtney Miller
Just like, hi, Pam.
- [44:25]
Keith Leak Jr.
What the.
- [44:25]
Courtney Miller
It was the weirdest moment.
- [44:27]
Shane Topp
I definitely felt bad for her. We cut a lot, cuz. Yeah. I mean, she knew pretty quickly. Like, we cleared it up very quickly. But still, that just reaction.
- [44:35]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [44:35]
Shane Topp
Of like, oh, my God. Cuz. Yeah. What we cut was her getting sprayed with a super Soaker. And then be like, you cheated on me. And like, we were all just like, oh, no. And you were just like. I could tell in that moment I felt bad. Cuz you looked at her like, what? Obviously. No, like, hold on. What. What's going on? And then it's. It slowly hit. And I mean, everyone in that room. The problem is everyone in the room, I think, except you and Pam, knew it was going wrong because we were looking at each other, Damian and Courtney and I. And I was looking at the cameramen and everyone in the room, and everyone was like, eyes wide open, mouth agape, being like, what are you doing? And then after it all went down, my favorite quote from the day was, brennan, our cameraman, just looking at you and just went, ian, that was the dumbest thing I've ever seen. But I felt. I felt horrible because then later I saw you in our Castro and you're just kind of standing there, and I was like, hey, how are you doing? Like, it must have been, you know, I'm sorry. And you're just like, yeah, I just. I've never hurt her that way. And I was like.
- [45:39]
Courtney Miller
I was like, ah, Ian.
- [45:41]
Shane Topp
Like. And to hurt someone on that level when you didn't do anything wrong.
- [45:46]
Damien Haas
Yeah.
- [45:47]
Shane Topp
Like, you accidentally pulled a horrible prank is what happened. And you would never obviously do that to her.
- [45:53]
Ian Hecox
Hell no.
- [45:53]
Shane Topp
The sweetest human. So it's hard to see that.
- [45:57]
Ian Hecox
Yeah.
- [45:58]
Shane Topp
So, yeah, I felt for both of you, and I think we all do. So.
- [46:03]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, it's really funny. When we broke up, I was having, like, little sort of, like, anxiety attacks, and I kind of told her about it, and she. She's like, okay, well, I have, like, this kind of, like, medication that, you know, if you're having an anxiety attack. You could take it and it kind of kills it immediately. And she kind of like gave me like a small, like a small amount. Like not like a full dose. She's like, if you ever feel it, you know, take one of these. So I kept it in my backpack. I actually never ended up using it. I got better. I still had it in my backpack. And so like after, after the shoot, like I walked into the room and. And I was like, are you feeling okay? And she's like, no. I was like, are you. I have that medication you gave me.
- [46:49]
Shane Topp
Do you want to.
- [46:50]
Ian Hecox
She's like, yeah. So it strangely like came full circle.
- [46:54]
Courtney Miller
Full circle.
- [46:55]
Shane Topp
She seemed fine pretty quickly. Like she, she really pulled it together very well. But just.
- [47:00]
Courtney Miller
It just shakes you a little bit.
- [47:01]
Shane Topp
Oh my God. Yeah. Well, it's the context. It's getting told you you were cheated on is one thing if it's told in a specific way. But getting sprayed in the face with a super Soaker in front of a bunch of people. Yeah. Is having.
- [47:16]
Courtney Miller
Having said that, I respect the hell out of you for putting out the video and acknowledging it and like talking about it now because I feel like I would have been like, no, please. Like, there's no way we can cut it to make this fine. Like, please. But you were like, no, we, we.
- [47:28]
Shane Topp
It happened pretty immediately because I talked to you and Pam after. I was like, you guys, you know, you know, you don't have to put it out there. You can cut whatever. And both of you were like, nah.
- [47:36]
Ian Hecox
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Courtney Miller
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Ian Hecox
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Courtney Miller
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Ian Hecox
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Olivia Sui
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Ian Hecox
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- [48:04]
Damien Haas
Void we're prohibited by law 21 +.
- [48:06]
Shane Topp
Terms and conditions apply. We did it. Let's do it.
- [48:10]
Ian Hecox
So this next clip is from the same episode. Episode 17. Shane, Damien and myself talk about insecurities. Yeah, because we got feelings. Enjoy. Do you guys struggle with any sort of like, insecurities?
- [48:29]
Shane Topp
Well, a reason I also, I think therapy is great is because, you know, I don't have. I'm not an expert in psychology, but from the classes I've taken, like the big takeaway is that we know far less about ourselves than we think we do. So you might think you know what your insecurities exactly are, and you probably know a lot of them, or you think you know what your issues are, but there's probably a lot that you're just simply unaware of. That through a therapist asking you the right questions and just conversing with them will be brought to the forefront. And then you'll be like, oh, my gosh, I wasn't aware of some of these things that then it helps so much.
- [49:10]
Courtney Miller
Yeah, I mean, I think everybody has a lot of insecurities too. I mean, I. I have not been feeling good about my physical appearance lately. Probably for the past, like, year, year and a half. Like, if you watch older smosh videos, I was like, much thinner then and. And also had a lot of stomach problems, which is partially why that is. But my parents were always very physical. They met because my dad owned a gym and my mom taught aerobics there. And so that was always a way to.
- [49:35]
Ian Hecox
I bet they have great photos from the 80s.
- [49:38]
Courtney Miller
None. Literally none.
- [49:39]
Ian Hecox
What?
- [49:40]
Courtney Miller
I asked my mom for 80s photos for a potential video that we. And they're literally none.
- [49:44]
Ian Hecox
Bullshit. Bullshit.
- [49:46]
Courtney Miller
But, like, I, you know, that was a good way to get, like, attaboys from the parents. And like, ah, you've been exercising. Like, that's great. And now that's not a part of my life so much. Cause I'm just so busy doing either voiceover twitch or being here that I just do not have time to exercise right now. And I've let myself go by the wayside a bit. But I'm trying to figure out how to still feel good about myself, even if it's not in a physical way. And I've never been comfortable in my body. I was a chubby kid.
- [50:09]
Shane Topp
But yeah, I would say you're insanely hard on yourself in that regard. Because I don't think anyone would definitely. People watching, I don't think would ever claim you to be out of shape. But I notice all the time you talking like, oh, yeah, I don't know about this shirt. It makes me like this or whatever. Or we'll take a group photo and you'll be like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't like how I look in that. Or whatever. Like you pointed out in videos and edits, you're like, ah, I look like this. And I'm like, I would have never noticed it. You're holding such a lens to yourself and being so hard on Yourself.
- [50:39]
Ian Hecox
Yeah. Oftentimes, we're our own biggest critics.
- [50:42]
Courtney Miller
Thank God, because if anyone else was worse on me, I'd be like, that dude's just an asshole.
- [50:46]
Ian Hecox
Well, we wouldn't keep them around. Like, honestly, like, we're like, I think, you know, one of the greatest things about the people that we sort of kept around ourselves and surrounded ourselves with here is, like, everyone is super supportive of each other. And, you know, we all. We all want the best for each other. I would hope that, you know, if any of us are struggling with anything that, you know, we would all be here for each other.
- [51:08]
Keith Leak Jr.
Sure.
- [51:08]
Shane Topp
Absolutely.
- [51:09]
Courtney Miller
No, I love these. There's no real reason for it. I love the people around me. Nobody's been, like, mean about anything on the Internet, which is shocking, but, like, it just comes from within, and I know it's something I've got to work on mentally as well as physically.
- [51:21]
Ian Hecox
Yeah. I feel like I'm. I'm mean to you when you're talking shit about yourself. And I'm like, you shut up right now.
- [51:30]
Courtney Miller
Yeah, you do that. I like it.
- [51:31]
Ian Hecox
I feel like I'm like, well, maybe I'm being too mean, but I'm like, shut the hell up, Damian.
- [51:38]
Shane Topp
And I don't think those insecurities would leave you if you got into the best shape of your life. You would still. Those insecurities are still there, and you're still going to be like, oh, I don't know about this today, or, I don't know, whatever. If you're insecure about your body, you're going to be insecure about your body, and you can't. The only way to beat that is to mentally, you know, counteract that or to find ways around it.
- [52:01]
Courtney Miller
I mean, you're somebody. You exercise all the flipping time. And when I see you, I think you're, like, the most shredded person I've ever met. But if you're talking about those insecurities not leaving you, do you feel like you still deal with that stuff?
- [52:13]
Shane Topp
Absolutely.
- [52:14]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [52:15]
Shane Topp
Yeah. And I mean, I'd say part of the reason I work out so incessantly is because, like, if I go two days without working out, I'll be like, oh, God, I feel. I feel like goo today. I. Yeah, I hate it. And it's. It changes, right? Like, cuz it'll be, you know, for the longest time, it was that I was like, oh, I'm too skinny. I'm like, whatever. I. You knew up until, like, I want to say, the age of 23 or 24, I wore jackets year round. Like even when it was like I.
- [52:44]
Courtney Miller
Can think of that black jean jacket. It's what I met you when you were wearing it.
- [52:47]
Shane Topp
Yeah, that, that or that was, it was like that Robert Pattinson Y type black, black one. And then I switched to the green leather one which I would still wear when I started here. And I would wear them if it was 90 degrees outside, I'd still be wearing that jacket. And it was just, just because I was just like oh my. I don't like how my arms look today.
- [53:05]
Ian Hecox
Wow.
- [53:06]
Shane Topp
I didn't really like, whatever.
- [53:07]
Ian Hecox
Really?
- [53:07]
Shane Topp
Yeah. So, so yeah, no. And then like pool parties and stuff, I'd be like, oh shit. Like no way.
- [53:13]
Courtney Miller
Because I feel like that. And if you feel like that, there's no hope for me.
- [53:16]
Shane Topp
It's just, it's just. I don't know. And it's. And then it changes, man. Like cuz I, I definitely, you know, I can't self diagnose but you know, with like body dysmorphia and stuff. I still don't think like I'm that big. Like I don't think I'm that buff or anything. Like, I don't, I don't. I would. I think of my body as being rather average size. But what'll happen is sometimes even if I do get bigger, then I'll just be like, oh, but it's shaped, my body's shaped weird or it just looks weird or just doesn't look good. I don't look, I just don't look like I'm in great shape. I just, whatever. So it changes all the damn time and it's really tough to keep up with and I really am a, you know, it's, I'm a prisoner to it sometimes because there'll be days where like if I haven't worked out for a couple days and then say it's, you know, oh, I haven't worked out for the past two days but today everyone's going to Disneyland. But if I go, I'm not gonna be able to make it to the gym. And I'll be like, should I go? Interesting. Should I, should I go or should I go to the gym?
- [54:19]
Ian Hecox
See, I had no idea, I had no idea that you know, you struggled with this because I, you know, I mean we make, we make jokes all the time and I don't know if it's, if it's, if it's hurtful now that I'm thinking about it. We make jokes all the time about how swole you are.
- [54:35]
Shane Topp
Yeah, it Just I think I have gotten much better at about everything through smosh. Just because, not necessarily through praise doesn't really help any of it. In fact, sometimes I think it makes it worse. A lot of the most insecure people I know physically are the models and the like, best looking people I've met. Because growing up they were constantly told, you're so pretty, you're so attractive. So it's like, oh, that's my entire worth. So if I lose that even for a moment, I am nothing.
- [55:05]
Courtney Miller
Got it.
- [55:06]
Shane Topp
And probably the same why people who are praised for being super smart then get super insecure if their intelligence gets, you know, questioned.
- [55:12]
Courtney Miller
But that's the thing about you too, that's interesting to me is like you're, you're an incredibly well rounded person. So like, yeah, you exercise constantly, you're doing fine in that department, but also you have a lot of intelligence to back it up. Your house, which we saw in the house tour, is stacked with books that you've read, not even counting the books that you gave away. Cause you know you're just not going to read them again. You're always trying to like, you know, discover more things about like music. You were teaching yourself guitar, right now you're learning Spanish. Like there's so much that like, even if your physical stuff went away, even if all your books burned and you couldn't read anymore, like you would have so much to fall back on. So it's interesting to hear. And I know nothing I say can fix anything, but it's just interesting knowing that like, you know, a lot of people have one thing to build self worth off of. You've got a lot of things.
- [55:57]
Shane Topp
Yeah, I mean, I don't know, it's tough. I mean I. But we could all say that for ourselves, right? Like, I don't know, I feel like a lot could be the exact same could be said to you, could be said to all of us that work here and for so many people who are insecure. And I think there's an aspect of insecurity fueling that motivation. But I don't think it's a good fuel. I think a better fuel is just enjoying life and doing things because it's fun and wanting improving yourself, because improving yourself is fun for the sake of it, not for, oh, I need to improve myself to become something that's worthwhile.
- [56:35]
Ian Hecox
Did those insecurities become worse after your last breakup or.
- [56:41]
Shane Topp
I actually think they were. They've gotten better, I think. And it changes, you know, as you get older, just different Just in life, insecurities just switch around. I think when I'm insecure, I am insecure about anything and I will find the thing to be insecure about. You know, I'll be like oh, I'm short or oh I'm this or oh, I'm, I'm not whatever. Like if it's. And it'll be physical or then it'll be just who I am or something like that. I mean and I think that goes for everybody. I think, I think insecurity is insecurity, it takes many forms.
- [57:14]
Courtney Miller
I think there is a good humble way to look at that and be like, you know, everybody can say that we all have these different talents and different things to fall back on, but I found that you are somebody. And just speaking as a friend here, I found that you are somebody that will do that all the time to the point where it's not even a sense of necessarily being humble but you're taking victories away from yourself. Everybody has different things that they can consider, you know, a source of pride for themselves or I should, I should hope so. And if you don't feel that way, you should definitely do some soul searching and find it because it is out there. But with how many different areas of expertise you have, Shane, I think it's okay to like every once in a while say it just for yourself. And it's not even an arrogant thing. It's like, you know what, not everybody is able to do all these different things. Good for me because it's not like I was born being the best runner, smartest boy in comedy. Like you work flippin hard in a lot of areas. So I would just encourage you to, you know, acknowledge that for yourself. You know, everybody has the insecurities, everybody can fall back on stuff but you work hard to have a lot of things you're good at. Good for Shane.
- [58:20]
Shane Topp
Thanks man.
- [58:20]
Courtney Miller
You got it.
- [58:21]
Shane Topp
Thank you. Yeah. And I, I don't know, it's. It's like I said the even self praise it's not, I don't know, I feel that it's not like that's like, oh great, I am this thing. I am who I need to be to be happy, right?
- [58:36]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [58:36]
Shane Topp
I just think that the pursuit of all those things for the sake of finding happiness will never achieve it. I think when I find, when I'm able to let go of those insecurities is when I, I think honestly what it is is in its own form, selfishness. Right. I'm doing all these things to improve myself. Whatever I'm thinking, but it's just that I'm thinking about myself. I'm so focused in on improving myself and becoming something that I need to be, that I'm not looking outward. And so when I let go of that and I go, you know what? I'm gonna focus on my friends, my family, the people around me and what makes them amazing. Suddenly then. And you just lose yourself. And it's. It's this. It is kind of this euphoria, this breaking free of that prison that you get into yourself when you're just locked into your own head about what's wrong with you and what everybody's thinking about you instead, going, no, I'm gonna focus on what's great about everyone around me, what I love about them. And then you feel that connection to everyone. You go. And then you suddenly feel loved because you're looking for that when you're trapped inside yourself. But you can't feel that love because you're just inside yourself. You're sealed away. You get out. You go, okay, I'm with everyone. Oh, my God. I'm loved, and I love them. And great. And now I feel great.
- [59:45]
Ian Hecox
So this next clip is from episode 25 with Courtney, Noah, and Keith. And Courtney and Keith hash out some real drama. And it's all about a desk. Enjoy.
- [59:59]
Olivia Sui
I used to rearrange my apartment or room, like, regularly.
- [60:03]
Keith Leak Jr.
I know. You rearranged the desk that one time. Let's. We can always go back. I always want to go back to the desk. Listen, I'm still dealing with that.
- [60:12]
Olivia Sui
Really?
- [60:12]
Keith Leak Jr.
Okay. Low key. On the. On the real. I am. Can I say, like, let me.
- [60:16]
Olivia Sui
I'm done.
- [60:17]
Keith Leak Jr.
Like, this is the thing. Okay, let's talk about it.
- [60:18]
Olivia Sui
But we have to, like, take turns.
- [60:19]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah, we're gonna take turns. Okay. So this is my thing when, for me, this is.
- [60:24]
Olivia Sui
I love this.
- [60:25]
I
Wait, do we need backstory?
- [60:26]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. Yeah.
- [60:26]
I
Can I give quick?
- [60:27]
Olivia Sui
You could tell it. You were kind of the middleman.
- [60:29]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah.
- [60:29]
I
You are the eyewitness. So essentially, it's a Friday. I believe Courtney started working with us on a Monday. Whatever. Everyone's meeting, whatever. We're in an office. It's white walls. We don't really talk to anyone. We're stuck in a room for, like, eight hours a day with each other. That's really it. We all have our own computer and a weird desk in each corner. That's it. That's the.
- [60:47]
Keith Leak Jr.
I like my corners.
- [60:49]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [60:49]
Keith Leak Jr.
And then I think Courtney asked. She was like, could we, like, do something with the room? Dah. Dah, dah, dah.
- [60:54]
Olivia Sui
But I thought you were telling the whole story.
- [60:55]
I
Oh, I'll tell the whole story. I'm so sorry. Okay. So then there was a group talk. I believe it was our producer at the time, Sonny and Joe Beretta. I believe we all got together on that Friday, all the cast too. And they were like, hey, do you want to possibly rearrange the room? I know everyone's got individual desks, but maybe we do some sort of group desks situation or something like that. I believe we went around to ask people's opinions. I believe it was two in the yes, three in the no, or two in the yes, two in the no. Shane wasn't around at the time with Olivia and Keith saying, no, we don't want our stuff moved. No on the movement.
- [61:25]
Ian Hecox
No.
- [61:25]
I
Courtney saying, I would really, really love it. And me saying, oh, I do like that idea. I think it would be a lot more collaborative for all of us to have desks together.
- [61:32]
Olivia Sui
Did you say that? Oh, oh, yes, I did.
- [61:35]
I
I did. I said yes, whatever. But you know what? After our conversation, I believe we landed on. We weren't gonna move them yet, but the idea was, you know, accept it. 50, 50. At that point. That was Friday. Monday, we all come back.
- [61:48]
Keith Leak Jr.
I walk in this mother. I walk in the office, and the desk. My desk was gone.
- [61:54]
Olivia Sui
No, it wasn't gone. It was knocked over by the farm.
- [61:57]
I
You pushed two desks together. Each desk had a separate desk, as if the computer. The back of the computers would face each other. So it's like one long desk like that and two people are on the opposite ends.
- [62:08]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yes.
- [62:08]
I
You and me were together, and then they were together.
- [62:10]
Keith Leak Jr.
So look, I came in.
- [62:11]
Olivia Sui
It's still hurting for.
- [62:12]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yes. I'm like, this is the thing. I have trust issues.
- [62:14]
Olivia Sui
I'd really be hurting.
- [62:15]
Keith Leak Jr.
I'm telling you that. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Because it's like a straight up. When you tell somebody, no, I don't want something some way. And I come in and the first thing she says to me, and I didn't even like when you said this to me, I kind of like. Like, my inside just bursted. You were like, you like, yeah, I mixed. I moved the desk. Do you like it?
- [62:32]
Olivia Sui
I'm thinking like, yeah, no, I came in hot. Like, I literally came in hot.
- [62:38]
Courtney Miller
So unbelievable.
- [62:38]
Keith Leak Jr.
When she asked me, I just met this girl and she's moving my desk. And then she asked me if I like it when I just told her on Friday what she like, I was like, oh, my God, she's nuts. She's nice. I'm thinking, like, what did I do wrong to deserve this? That was in my head, like, it was the ultimate, dude. Oh, like, you gotta understand, like, when I go through it, I'm going through it.
- [62:58]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. That doesn't sound fun.
- [62:59]
Keith Leak Jr.
No, it's not. It wasn't fun, too. Like, to. For someone. For me to say, like, yo, please don't. You can move anybody else's. And to be told, like, you know, like, straight up icon contact, and then to, like, be pulled back and then the same person be like, hey, do you like it? It's like, oh, my God. I'm like, yo, does she, like. Does she. Does she want problems?
- [63:18]
Olivia Sui
I was like, no qualms?
- [63:19]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah. I. I honestly didn't know. I was like, yo, she's trying to pick on me. Like, I really felt like you were picking up.
- [63:25]
Olivia Sui
Oh, my God.
- [63:26]
Keith Leak Jr.
I had to deal with it for a long time. We went through our.
- [63:30]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [63:30]
Keith Leak Jr.
And I had to really deal with it, even to the point now where I think about it sometimes and it's, like, fun. But I was like, dang. Like, this really took me to a place of just not trusting and not, like, we had to build that love and trust. And we do have it, like, all. By all means. Like, we love each other. Like, Courtney. I'll text her every now and again just to be like, you know, I love you, or she'll send pictures or whatever. But, like, it was definitely for me, like, out of, like, the, like, all of us, it was just like, damn. Like, who can I trust in this? Like, I'm coming into a whole different, like, situation. Like, how am I supposed to trust someone when we have, like, an understanding and the understanding is just like, like, what up? You like this? I did it for you. Like, no, that was not for me. That was like, all you.
- [64:11]
I
Courtney, real quick, before we get to your side, I just want to say two things, Keith, for me, experiencing that. Number one, I did like the desks a lot more.
- [64:19]
Olivia Sui
You did say 10 out of 10.
- [64:20]
Ian Hecox
That's what that's like.
- [64:20]
I
I did enjoy the rereads.
- [64:22]
Keith Leak Jr.
You liked them?
- [64:23]
I
Yeah, I loved it. And it was much more effective. She did do a great job rearranging it. Our desks were by the windows. Each person had a window to share. It was done.
- [64:31]
Olivia Sui
But he didn't. Keith lost his special spot where he had his zone.
- [64:36]
Keith Leak Jr.
I told you guys, I like my corners. And as much as we're a group, we are individuals that come from different places, struggle with different thought processes and everything. And for me, it was just like, oh, boom. What up?
- [64:48]
I
It was really funny to see a fight happen over a desk.
- [64:51]
Keith Leak Jr.
Oh, then the fight.
- [64:53]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. I love you.
- [64:54]
Keith Leak Jr.
I love.
- [64:54]
Olivia Sui
I love you.
- [64:55]
Keith Leak Jr.
I know you do. I trust you.
- [64:56]
Olivia Sui
We've been through a lot, and, like, I'm going to say my honest opinion about that whole situation because, like, dude, I was a control freak when I came in. I was ready to make myself a part of everything and, like, be a part of everything, whether you guys are ready for not. I wanted to be your best friends, and I didn't realize that some people don't like that right away. I totally came in too hot when that happened. Like, and maybe you said directly. No, I don't remember. I thought it was, like. I don't know. Like, I'm not sure that's what I remember. But it could have been that I still was wrong for taking your guys's space and moving it, because that was not my fucking job. Your reaction was so shocking and, like, I feel terrible that it affected you for that long. Like, it affected me terribly because it affected you so much. And I was like, holy shit. I made this person feel so much anger. And I know you didn't let it go for months, and, like, I didn't earn your trust for months.
- [65:50]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah, it was like, a trusting for me, especially with it being, like, a. You being a new person. It was like, damn. Like, if this is how this is gonna go, like, I don't know if I can, like, really be cool, you know?
- [65:59]
Olivia Sui
I just.
- [66:00]
Keith Leak Jr.
Cause we're so different.
- [66:01]
Olivia Sui
We. We totally are. And, like, you literally did not know me at all. And, like, I came at it with, like, a. Oh. Like, this is something exciting and new. And, like, me rearranging is, like a fun, like, cleanse that happens in a room. It's like my equivalent of, like, saging a place or whatever. But, like, the. Like, I just.
- [66:19]
H
Just.
- [66:20]
Olivia Sui
It was just a desk, dude.
- [66:22]
Keith Leak Jr.
No, but the desk. But the.
- [66:23]
Ian Hecox
The.
- [66:24]
Keith Leak Jr.
The. It was the no that, like, really made me upset. Yeah, so it was like, we had this conversation. It was like. It was just a desk. And that's how simple it was. If. If you just move a desk when I tell you, like, don't move mine, I said, you can move everybody else's. And then we get to the point where you just, like, come in and then you ask me if I. Like, I'm like, yo, this. She's playing games, and I know how to play. I know how People play games. I know how I play games sometimes. Everybody plays games. So in my head, it just was like, game. We play Monopoly in this hoe shit. Like, what the fuck? Like, I didn't know.
- [66:56]
I
Like, I never experienced anything.
- [66:59]
Olivia Sui
Like, I don't believe everyone's trying to play games because, like, my. That's another.
- [67:03]
Keith Leak Jr.
That's a personal thing too.
- [67:04]
Olivia Sui
For me.
- [67:04]
Keith Leak Jr.
That is a personal thing. But like, that. No. And that, like, even that we're talking about it today, like, it's still kind of like. I mean, those are the foundations of relationships.
- [67:13]
Courtney Miller
Yeah.
- [67:14]
I
The legitimate love.
- [67:14]
Ian Hecox
That's.
- [67:15]
Olivia Sui
It was beginning stuff. But, like, that sucks when it's like, we're still learning each other. And, like, that experience was really hard for me too. And like, I. I wronged you. I invaded your space. It was incorrect that I did that. I just couldn't believe, like, how long and, like, how harshly you treated me. Like. And again, like, we've been through whatever. I fucking love you both. Like, I tried to apologize and, like. And then, like, you just didn't take it well. And, like, I started crying and then, like, you felt bad and hugged me.
- [67:47]
Keith Leak Jr.
There was a separation for sure.
- [67:49]
Olivia Sui
Yeah.
- [67:49]
Keith Leak Jr.
The separation is just like how for you, you say it was just a desk. It was like, for me, it was just a no. You know, just to say that. And then I feel like, because of that whole, like. Like, oh, you're feeling this way, I'm feeling this way. It's just like, we had our own films. We just. It was hard for me with it being so new to understand somebody to, like, you know.
- [68:08]
Olivia Sui
Yeah. You don't know my.
- [68:09]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah, so I'm like, so my. But like, in my head, I thought your intentions were so, like, just against me. And I, like, this is something I have to work on, like, with people in general. I don't let people in.
- [68:20]
I
I really don't.
- [68:21]
Keith Leak Jr.
I struggle with it. Like, all my friends that know me personally, like, on a deep level, they're like, yo, Keith is not cool right now. Like, what do you need? Like, you know, like, I just have people that support me in that way. And, like, I do take friendship very, very seriously. And it was just like, damn. Like, like, now I gotta work with somebody who's just like, so, like. Like, I guess, inconsiderate for me, you know?
- [68:43]
Olivia Sui
No, it was like. And that's. It came across to you as into inconsiderate and all this shit. And it's like. And it's real. Like, you're. That's what you felt. And like, that's how it came across. I am like, oh, this is great. Like, I'm gonna do this thing for these guys, and, like, maybe they'll like what I do like it. I fucking know. I fucking drew fan art of you guys. I'm such a fucking door.
- [69:03]
I
No, you're really a sweet person.
- [69:05]
Keith Leak Jr.
Like, that's not a problem.
- [69:08]
I
Communicate similarly.
- [69:09]
Olivia Sui
I weirdly, like, those first few months, like, we. We did not vibe well, and, like, it was really hard for me because it's like, for me, the way I view friends. At least back then. Oh, 100%. Like, at least back then, it was like, oh, friends. The more the merrier. I'm not gonna check you psychologically. I'm gonna let you in, and you're gonna learn everything about me, and I'm gonna trust. Trust you with my life. And, like, for that, I've made some serious mistakes.
- [69:30]
Keith Leak Jr.
We are the complete opposite. Yeah, is what it was. It's hot. What is it, fire and ice or fire? All I'm saying, we are complete opposites because, like, like you said, I'm gonna allow people to come in and blah, blah, blah, all that. I'm like, yo. Like, I'm not like. And I'm just like, yeah. You know what I mean? And, like, honestly, I feel like out of anybody in the group, I feel like we've actually clash the most.
- [69:54]
Olivia Sui
Oh, yeah.
- [69:54]
Keith Leak Jr.
You know what I mean? Like, it's just been like, a. It's. But it's never, like. We can always look back in hindsight, in the moment, it, like, hurts, you know, for, like, everybody involved. And that doesn't make anybody feel comfortable in the group.
- [70:06]
Olivia Sui
But on the outside looking in.
- [70:07]
Ian Hecox
What's up?
- [70:08]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah. How do you see it?
- [70:08]
I
Like, honestly, both of you communicate very similarly, which is not how I communicate, or I don't think I'm as good at it, which is both of you are, like, very emotional people in no negative. But in the way we're like, you guys very much are in tune with how people are feeling, how, like, you feel, and, like, how those things kind of connect in communication. I don't know if I'm doing a good job describing what I'm trying to. But both of you are, like, give people hugs. Both of you very often will, like, affirm love or kindness for each other. Other people around you. Both of you will make sure someone feels comfortable if, like, you notice that they don't. And just to touch on the. The early days, like, really, it's. It's like you coming in, being new like, us being stuck there in like a room for like six months, meeting you randomly and like, you coming in with the exact same energy we had six months prior. And it's definitely like, we did not let you in as much as the.
- [71:01]
Olivia Sui
Energy right out of, you know, the opposite.
- [71:04]
I
You gave us energy. And that was like. We didn't know why you were coming in with energy because you had yet to realize what the first year was like, which was like, hey, we're not announced yet. Like, we're. We're just kind of secretly doing this and that. Like, so it kind of. We. We pretty much spent months just in the same room together. There wasn't much space. There wasn't much to do. So it makes sense.
- [71:25]
Keith Leak Jr.
Like a boring white office room. Like, kids that have never really, really had real job.
- [71:30]
I
It looks like your teacher's desk.
- [71:31]
Keith Leak Jr.
I think Courtney was the only one that had like a real job because you worked at a pharmacy.
- [71:35]
Olivia Sui
But, like, taco stand.
- [71:37]
Keith Leak Jr.
That wasn't like a, like a job, like a grown up job, though. That's like some kid, like, let's go like, make some. Had a few little restaurant situations. But, like, we were just in this white room. Like, I don't even know that they knew what they wanted to do with us or how, like, what the situation, what we actually were like. Guys, you gotta realize we are five different types of people. So different. Like, just the way, like, I mean, beyond the way we look, you know, and everything all together, like, the way that we all came together, y'all is like something that, like, people don't have and will never have.
- [72:09]
Olivia Sui
And I'm like five pieces from different.
- [72:11]
Ian Hecox
Oh, my God.
- [72:11]
Olivia Sui
Somehow fit it.
- [72:12]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah, it fit. And like, that's the thing. Beyond it fitting, like, the way that it fits now, we had to find how it to fit it, how the puzzle works. Like, it was like, I look back at, like, how I handled a lot of things in the beginning. Just like, with like, even this situation, I'm like, dang. I could have, like, softened up a little bit or listen, you know, I could have, you know, like, relaxed. We could have did all that. But like, the way that this, like, at the end of the day, we're not at the office as much as we used to be. But, like, I'm telling you, the love that I have for you, Courtney, the love that I have for Shane, like, Ian, like, it's real. It's real shit for me, like, I had to grow to love. I feel like we all had to grow to love different people. You know what I mean? Like, it's so cool. It's so cool. And people will never get this opportunity ever.
- [72:53]
Olivia Sui
And after experiencing the. Being in that room with you guys so much, I wouldn't want to do that with the person I love most. I would not want to be in the same room stuck with that person all the time, no matter how much I love them, because that's too much. You need to.
- [73:06]
I
With that being said, I would not trade those experiences for anything.
- [73:09]
Olivia Sui
I'm so glad we had them, but I wouldn't. What built us, Like, I wouldn't, like, oh, you have the opportunity to work 10 hours a day with your favorite sibling, and you like, do you want to do it? I was like, no, do you want to do what I've gotten? Enjoy them when I have them. Like, what we have now. But, like, yeah, I think we all grew so much. Not, like, not just together as a group, but, like, independently, because we were learning how to coexist with people we didn't would normally we. Keith, you and I specifically, I feel like we have very big personalities and, like, we're very passionate, and, like, we feel very hard. And so that's why, like, the clashes, like, they we feel that clash harder.
- [73:50]
Keith Leak Jr.
Than what we should. Like, honestly, harder than what we should. Like, I feel like in the moment there, we can validate it all day. Like, you know what I mean? But, like, hindsight, we is like, we just. We some crybabies. That's my B.
- [74:09]
Shane Topp
Step into the world.
- [74:10]
Ian Hecox
Of power, loyalty, and luck.
- [74:13]
Shane Topp
I'm gonna make him an offer he.
- [74:15]
Ian Hecox
Can'T refuse with family. Canola and spins mean everything.
- [74:19]
Shane Topp
Now you want to get mixed up.
- [74:21]
Keith Leak Jr.
In the family business.
- [74:22]
Ian Hecox
Introducing the godfather@champacasino.com test your luck in.
- [74:26]
Shane Topp
The shadowy world of the Godfather slots. Someday, I will call upon you to do a service for me. Play the Godfather now@shambacasino.com. welcome to the family. No purchase necessary. VGW Group void.
- [74:37]
Damien Haas
We're prohibited by law 21 plus terms and conditions apply.
- [74:40]
Ian Hecox
So this next episode is the so random Smosh cast episode featuring Damien Shane, Alison, Ashley arm and Matthew Scott Montgomery. And they talk about a sketch that was done on so random that was so bad that it never aired.
- [74:55]
Keith Leak Jr.
Enjoy.
- [74:59]
Shane Topp
So my favorite story, one of my top five favorite stories of all time is we did a sketch that never made it to air, thank God, called Teeny in a bottle. And I know it was Matthew, Scott and myself.
- [75:15]
Damien Haas
Were we the kids?
- [75:16]
Shane Topp
You were the dad.
- [75:17]
I
I was the dad.
- [75:18]
Shane Topp
I was the son.
- [75:19]
Ian Hecox
Tiffany was my wife or baby mama. Audrey was your.
- [75:23]
Shane Topp
Audrey was my sister. So we were the children. So the sketch was like a 60s sitcom. Like a 60s sitcom family.
- [75:31]
Ian Hecox
Cleaning out the basement. I was like, hey, kids, I found this lamp in the basement.
- [75:35]
Shane Topp
Wanna rub it? And then out of it, out of this genie lamp that we find, comes a teenage genie who doesn't grant any wishes. Cause she's sassy and doesn't wanna like it.
- [75:47]
Courtney Miller
Can't be bothered. She's a teenager.
- [75:48]
Ian Hecox
She's like an angry, sassy teen.
- [75:50]
Shane Topp
There was a lot of issues with the girl who played the.
- [75:54]
Ian Hecox
She played Teeny.
- [75:55]
Shane Topp
Who played Teeny. She had to be painted and they painted her green. But that wasn't working. So the producers were so focused on her and how she was doing the character that Matthew Scott and I were just like, let's give the worst performances of our lives.
- [76:09]
Ian Hecox
We were running behind on time. The actress name was Coco Jones. She was having a really hard time with the material.
- [76:14]
Courtney Miller
She was also like a toddler. She looked like an adult, but she was like 11, 12.
- [76:18]
Ian Hecox
You know, the notes they're getting from the network or whatever, that was like. Everything she was doing was, like, too negative or, like, would be a bad influence on kids. But that was kind of how it was written. So on the fly, they're trying to rewrite it to make it more positive, but it's not working. She's half in green makeup. What was the line about being adopted?
- [76:33]
Shane Topp
I don't even know.
- [76:34]
Ian Hecox
Like, there was some line where it's like, what do you want to wish for? And like, you were. Audrey's like, I wish I weren't adopted. And like, do you remember that? And we, like, were improving and they're like, okay, am moving on.
- [76:44]
Shane Topp
We're like, dude, no, I. So we start this. And Matthew Scott and I had talked, but we're like, let's go insane with this.
- [76:50]
Ian Hecox
Yes.
- [76:51]
Shane Topp
So I'm gonna see. And I'm thinking, I'm gonna go nuts. And all of a sudden, Matthew Scott just goes, uh, genie.
- [76:59]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yes.
- [77:00]
Shane Topp
Literally.
- [77:01]
Courtney Miller
Do you remember the face, though? I was watching this on the, like, closed circuit TV in the dressing room, and I.
- [77:07]
Keith Leak Jr.
You.
- [77:07]
Courtney Miller
I think you said you turned to Matthew Scott at one point, he just went like.
- [77:11]
Shane Topp
Just gritted teeth, eyes looking like they're gonna pop out of his face. You looked both angry and happy at the same time.
- [77:20]
Ian Hecox
We were running way behind. And the last shot we had to get was like the opening credit shot where it's like. And that's teeny or whatever. It was. And it was a shot of me and my family shoved around each other and, like, Coco popping up between us. And we only had time for one take. And so instead of me saying the line, that's teeny.
- [77:35]
Shane Topp
I literally would go, like.
- [77:38]
Ian Hecox
Literally, like, that made the most we throw. There was moments where you just were.
- [77:43]
Shane Topp
Screaming in it where it was just like, she, like, reacts. She's like. She's like, I'm not gonna grant that wish.
- [77:50]
Keith Leak Jr.
And no one corrected me.
- [77:52]
Shane Topp
No one corrected me.
- [77:53]
Ian Hecox
And then they were like, okay, check in the gate. Time to go to lunch. And I was like, that's gonna be dumb. I was laughing.
- [77:57]
Olivia Sui
No, it was not.
- [77:59]
Shane Topp
I was laughing through most of the takes. I didn't have a line delivered where I wasn't like, what a genius. And we only shot our stuff once.
- [78:07]
Ian Hecox
Because they didn't have time, so we.
- [78:09]
Courtney Miller
Knew that they were going to have.
- [78:10]
Ian Hecox
To use those things.
- [78:12]
Shane Topp
You had a part where you folded your arms, but you didn't touch your arms. Did not touch. You just, like, weirdly folded them. Oh, my God. It was absolutely insane. And they said nothing. We're like. They never even looked at me. Damian was watching it on the monitor, and I come back up, like, did you watch it? He's like, no. Do you know what happened?
- [78:31]
Ian Hecox
Everyone's watching on the monitors in the dressing room, and they were so disturbed by what we were doing that they came out to set me, like, is everything okay?
- [78:37]
Damien Haas
Like, what's happening?
- [78:39]
Ian Hecox
We're. They were so concerned with Coco that they never looked at us.
- [78:43]
Courtney Miller
It was the most.
- [78:44]
Shane Topp
It is the hardest I've ever laughed.
- [78:46]
Ian Hecox
I went, there's this guy Skip who was editing, and I went to him in the editor's bay a couple weeks later. I was like, can I please watch Teeny in a bottle? He's like, oh, no. We scrapped all of that. He was like, we couldn't use any of that. I was like, oh, my God.
- [78:57]
Olivia Sui
Is it just a bullet is just deleted.
- [78:59]
Ian Hecox
I mean, I would give anything to watch all that stuff now.
- [79:02]
Shane Topp
Oh, man. There was so many funny moments.
- [79:04]
Ian Hecox
Oh, man. Oh, man. What a bad sketch. Right, guys? There's no one else here in this room. Well, this next clip comes from episode 33, and it's myself, Noah, and Keith. And Keith opens up out of nowhere about how he hasn't been feeling so good and the steps that he's taking to be happier and healthier. So, Keith, you've. You've. You've made some changes in your life.
- [79:38]
Keith Leak Jr.
Oh, yeah, I have. Actually. Not as Much as people think. Like, I've been trying to get a lot more healthy. I've been trying to go on hikes because, like, I do have a lot more free time. And I see that I am starting to gain weight. I'm 27 years old now. Don't tell nobody but God, but I'm 27 years old, and. And weight is sticking to me like never before.
- [80:01]
Ian Hecox
27'S the turning point. That's the final dying gasp of our metabolism.
- [80:06]
Keith Leak Jr.
So let me just say this. So I went. I weighed myself. I didn't even know. Like, one of my roommates has, like, a scale in the bathroom, and I never weigh myself. I don't really. I weigh myself, but, like, not that often. And I happened to look over, and I was like, okay, let me just weigh myself. Let me see where I'm at. Because my weight fluctuates. You know what I'm saying? It just say up and down, up and down and down. So I ended up weighing myself, and I was like, 140 or 141. I can't remember. My memory is not that good anymore. And, like, by the next week or the week after that, I want to say I was 145, and I had started hiking. I had started, like, doing, you know, like, a couple push ups. Like, not like, just a few. Just a few. Like, 10, 20 here, 30. If I'm feeling real nice, nice. But I've been doing that. But, like, to gain weight, I know it's not muscle. Like, I know it's not muscle. So, like, I. I also have to eat healthier, and I just. I honestly have to, like, honest, like, just monitor what I eat, what I do, what I drink. I can't drink beers as much. Y'all know I love a free beer at Kitchen24. I shouldn't have said that. You guys are gonna find me there. I'm going after this. Good Lord. But, like, like, dead ass, y'all. Like, I. I looked at the. The.
- [81:15]
Damien Haas
The.
- [81:15]
Keith Leak Jr.
The scale, the. The next two weeks or so, and I, like, weighed 145. And that scared me because I was like, yo, I'm actually trying to, like, take, you know, precaution and just, like, you know. Yeah, wait a out.
- [81:27]
Ian Hecox
Yeah, drinking's a big one, man. It's that. That. That'll catch up for sure.
- [81:32]
Keith Leak Jr.
It caught me. It caught. I'm starting to get, like, on my size right here. Yo, I'm starting.
- [81:37]
Ian Hecox
Oh, you got the love handles, like, beyond.
- [81:39]
Keith Leak Jr.
My mom calls them side items. I got Side items. But they also got. Got some dents in them. And I'm like, well, damn. I ain't never had no dents. Like, potholes everywhere. They some little cute ones. This, like, kind of like a beanie baby. You know how, like, when you touch it, it's just like the little, like, thingies in there. That's how the side items are. Yeah. You got something to hold on to. But I've definitely been, like, working out. I'm going hiking after. This is why I'm dressed like this. I'm very, you know, like, comfortable. You know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah. Get you a shirt.
- [82:06]
Ian Hecox
Oh, yeah.
- [82:07]
Shane Topp
Yeah.
- [82:09]
Keith Leak Jr.
This is.
- [82:10]
Ian Hecox
You gotta. You gotta get the slush cult merch before it's all gone. The collab. It's good.
- [82:14]
Keith Leak Jr.
It's really good.
- [82:15]
Ian Hecox
This shirt's actually incredibly, like, comfy. This material is super nice.
- [82:20]
Keith Leak Jr.
Mm.
- [82:20]
Ian Hecox
I don't know about.
- [82:21]
Keith Leak Jr.
This is.
- [82:21]
I
This is the last limited edition, which is super dope. But the hat is awesome. It's like a straight up custom.
- [82:28]
Ian Hecox
Yeah.
- [82:28]
I
Is this. What is this called? The five panel. Except I don't know how many.
- [82:31]
Ian Hecox
It's a camp. Camp hat.
- [82:32]
Keith Leak Jr.
I like how this turned into a commercial. And it's not about me anymore.
- [82:35]
Ian Hecox
Sorry.
- [82:36]
Keith Leak Jr.
It's okay. Get your stuff, though. Get your. Get your merch.
- [82:39]
Ian Hecox
Smosh that store.
- [82:40]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yep, yep, yep.
- [82:40]
Ian Hecox
Back to you, Keith.
- [82:41]
Keith Leak Jr.
But definitely just, like, trying to watch myself. And the funny thing is, like, people think that I'm better. Ryan was talking to Olivia recently, and he was like, yo. Like, how's Keith? And he's asking her questions, and she's like, yo. He's, like, healthier. He seems happier. And, guys, I am fighting so hard for my happiness. You know what I mean? When he brought it up earlier? Because, you know, we do talk about a little bit about, like, what we're gonna talk about before we get here, you know, just to, like, have a understanding of where things could go.
- [83:11]
Olivia Sui
And.
- [83:11]
Keith Leak Jr.
And I started thinking when he asked me, I was like, yo, like, I think I might be more depressed than I've ever been. And I beat myself up when I'm alone and everything. And I'm like, I'm fighting. And I feel like, oh, like, even saying it, I'm about to. I'm kind of getting emotional, like, just honestly, like, fighting for my life. You know what I mean?
- [83:29]
Ian Hecox
Really?
- [83:30]
Keith Leak Jr.
And it's. Yes, yes. And I find myself, you know, like, I go to church and everything, and I'm just trying to find something, like, I mean, like, I'm not Here all the time, you know what I mean? We don't come in Monday through Friday. I have a lot more time. I'm auditioning and stuff now, more so. And, you know, like, ideas. Like, what makes me happy?
- [83:47]
Ian Hecox
Yeah.
- [83:47]
Keith Leak Jr.
Like, what do I enjoy? Like, what's what? What's my identity? Like, who am I, like, really going through it, y'all? Like, when you have, like, so many people watching you, you have to. You start to watch yourself more. And to the point where you judge yourself way more than what you ever, like, would have if you only had a couple people, you know, eyes on you. But I honestly realized I am, like, I'm pushing through. I'm persevering. I take pride in just persevering and moving forward. But, like, I am doing these things, and, like, just because I don't feel the best, you know what I mean? I don't feel 100%. I'm trying to find it. I'm searching, y'all. I am searching. And the only way to, like, do. I'm doing something new. I used to make. Make fun of people for hiking, and now I'm like, yo, I see why people do it. I see why people work out. Remember, I will always say, like, I'm not working out for. I'm not doing this. Like, no, it's stupid. I didn't have to. Now my body's changing. Like, that's one thing. But, like, just the things that you're. Your psyche and your mental, like, I have to do that for that. Like, just going on the hikes, I get down, like, out the first day. Let me just start by the first day. The first day I did the hike. I had drank the day before. Just being transparent. Being very transparent right now, guys. I drank the day before, and me and my homeboy from Ohio, Zach, we had the idea to go and we had it for a week, like, a couple weeks, but I just never did it. But this time, like, I ended up waking up, and I got a message from him. He said, yo. And this was, like, 30 minutes before we were supposed to go because I was gonna bail. Like, I was gonna bail. Like, just straight up. I was, like, hungover. I shouldn't be doing this. Like, I'm dehydrated.
- [85:25]
Ian Hecox
And, like, how late were you up the night before?
- [85:27]
Keith Leak Jr.
I wanna say two or three. So, like. And then, like. But this is the thing. He hit me up at 10:30, so I can, like. I can move and, like, you know, make things work. Like, I'm a professional. He ended up, like, FaceTiming me, like, after, like, I seen a message and no, I FaceTimed him and I was like, bro, you know, hopefully that he would like, be like, see my face. Like, okay. Like he doesn't want to do it. But he was like, are we still doing it? I was like, yes. And I got up, I jumped up and y'all, it was the worst decision of my life. I felt like I was gonna die. I was walking up there. He brought his dog. So we're going. I'm like, oh, my God. I just started walk, got out the car and I'm walking up this damn hill and my calves are on fire. What is going on with me? What happened?
- [86:08]
Ian Hecox
And I'm guessing, did he not. And I'm guessing he probably didn't bring water.
- [86:12]
Keith Leak Jr.
You know, I ain't bring water. You know, I brought some soda non platters, but I brought some water. And I'm walking up and we start getting up there. We stop. He had to make a phone call. He does like, real estate or some stuff. So, like we stopped and we're talking. I'm like, well, this is great. This is great. We stopping, we're having a good time. I'm like, on my phone, Instagramming, just making content. And then we started walking. But we go up this steep ass hill and we walked up. It almost slipped. And I don't have good gym shoes. Gym shoes, tennis shoes. What are they? Sneakers? I don't know, hiking shoes. So I kind of slipped and I was like, okay, we get up there to this weird area and we do pushups. I'm like, okay, this is cool. I shouldn't have did the pushups. Y'all shouldn't have did the push ups. And I should have had water. Started walking. I'm like, okay, we're talking. After like five minutes into it, y'all, I felt the. The wind. It was hot. Then it got cold. And then I was like, whoa, what's going on? What's going on? So I keep walking. I'm like, he looks back, he's like, keith, are you okay? And I was like, no. But we keep walking. I'm like, I'm gonna keep it going. I'm like, hoping like somehow some way he would see, like, he could tell that I wasn't good. And every. Like, his. The dog wasn't either. His dog had like a fucking chinchilla fur on. What? Yeah, the dog had a full ass chinchilla fur.
- [87:30]
I
One second, one second. Chinchilla is the finest fur according to Jay Z.
- [87:34]
Keith Leak Jr.
That's what I'm saying.
- [87:35]
I
The dog had on chinchilla.
- [87:37]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yes. A whole chinchilla fur. So he's just pantsing.
- [87:40]
Courtney Miller
He's like.
- [87:41]
Keith Leak Jr.
I'm like, do you see your dog? Your dog's dying. Your dog's dying. And we keep walking. He's like, are you okay? I'm like, no, don't ask me that again. Let's kill.
- [87:48]
Damien Haas
Keep going.
- [87:49]
Keith Leak Jr.
Like, if you're not gonna ask me to go down, let's just keep going. So we keep going. We got up there, y'all felt like I was gonna die. I didn't feel good. But, like, once, like, you know how they tell you don't sit down. Like, and put your hands behind your head. Definitely sat down. Definitely did not do that. I was that bad. Like, I didn't feel like I was gonna make it. And I didn't have water. And I will never walk up a damn hill at all. I don't care what he'll. If it's just a hill like this that I just made, and I walk over this, I'm carrying some water with. With me, but did not feel good. But at the same time, at the end, I realized how much just, like, getting through it was for me. Like, just moving. Getting over the hill, y'all. Like, honestly, getting over the hill and fighting for it, because I did not feel good. I did not feel good. And I don't. I don't feel good right now. So I'm just being honest.
- [88:36]
I
Just so you know, it doesn't matter how you get there, okay? All that matters is that you make it to the other side, because it's the climb.
- [88:42]
Keith Leak Jr.
Oh, is that Miley Cyrus?
- [88:43]
I
That's Miley Cyrus. I might have misquoted.
- [88:45]
Keith Leak Jr.
I was serious. I almost cried and shit. I shouldn't even write that.
- [88:51]
Ian Hecox
I mean. And plus, if you keep doing the climb, it'll only get easier. And it's pretty remarkable if you just keep committing to that every single time is gonna be easier than the last. And then maybe one day you'll run up that thing.
- [89:09]
Keith Leak Jr.
Oh, I gotta stop doing a few things for.
- [89:15]
Ian Hecox
So. Last clip of the episode. This is from episode 40, where Olivia shares with Courtney no. And Shane about how when she was a child, she made all sorts of weird friends. Here it is.
- [89:32]
Shane Topp
You always know someone. Like, earlier today, I was like, I was been thinking about doing acupuncture. And you're like, I have a guy that does acupuncture.
- [89:39]
J
I know a lot of. I know a lot of. I have a lot of sources. But Then it's also also because I grew up in LA, so, like, you know, at age 15, I was going to weird places, just doing some investigating work.
- [89:55]
Shane Topp
When I was a detective.
- [89:56]
J
No, I would just, like, I didn't have anyone to talk to. Only child syndrome. I would just go linger at, like, I remember, like, at dollar stores or, like, liquor stores.
- [90:08]
Olivia Sui
Did you still have a roller backpack?
- [90:12]
Shane Topp
And I met many interesting people, and.
- [90:15]
J
I would just ask them a lot of questions and talk and, like, I'd become friends with them and.
- [90:19]
Shane Topp
Okay, hold on, we gotta. Olivia, how have I known you for four and a half years and I didn't know that when you were a kid, you would linger around dollar stores and meet people and find out about their lives.
- [90:29]
J
Oh, my God, you guys did.
- [90:31]
Shane Topp
Wait, what is your childhood?
- [90:33]
J
Well, because my first really good friend that I had in middle school was actually the custodian.
- [90:39]
Keith Leak Jr.
Wow.
- [90:39]
J
We, like. Because my mom wouldn't pick me up for three. Well, ever since elementary school, my mom would not pick me up for like, two or three hours. And then I beg mom, and then she'd open the trunk, say I was at Kmart. And, like, she was, like, shopping. And like, you guys can't really. It's very rare where I find someone who can relate to my childhood because my mom would just, like, leave me at school or, like, leave me in middle school. And in middle school, I stopped going to after school classes because I hated it. So I would just, like, wait three hours. Like, school would end at three, she would pick me up at six, and I would hang out with, like, I would hang out around the. There was a dollar store. I'd go hang out, and they'd close at like, 5. And then I'd go back to school and hang out with the custodian.
- [91:16]
Shane Topp
Wow. The custodian was cool.
- [91:18]
J
So cool.
- [91:19]
Shane Topp
And that was your first best friend.
- [91:20]
Keith Leak Jr.
That was cool.
- [91:21]
J
We were very close. I honestly forgot. But we talk about his kids. And then, yeah, it was talk about.
- [91:27]
Shane Topp
Like, you know, I would follow him.
- [91:29]
I
Around, trade Pokemon cards, and then I.
- [91:31]
J
Would help him with this. Truthfully, that's what I did.
- [91:34]
Shane Topp
And I really liked under the school.
- [91:37]
Noah Grossman
And then I used to go to this.
- [91:39]
J
I would go to this place called Bentoya, and I would hang out with.
- [91:43]
Olivia Sui
What is your life?
- [91:45]
J
I'd walk down the block. I'm just like. I made my stops. I'm like, hey, how you doing today?
- [91:49]
Ian Hecox
Wow.
- [91:50]
Shane Topp
You were like Belle from Beauty and the Beast. But it was just this street with a dollar store.
- [91:55]
J
There's a liquor Store. Just hang out.
- [91:57]
Shane Topp
Hey, Olivia. Hey, Olivia.
- [92:00]
Courtney Miller
Hey.
- [92:01]
J
How's your wife doing tonight? Are you guys going on the cruise?
- [92:04]
Olivia Sui
I can actually relate to the. I still have to, like, address this with my mom. Cause it's something I really recently figured out. Cause I'm pretty sure I was left places too, like McDonald's Play Place or like Barnes and Noble. Yeah.
- [92:16]
Shane Topp
See, my mom would pick me up and I would have to then go to the YMCA because she would have a couple more hours of work. And I would just chill at the gym. I wouldn't work out. I was just a kid. I was just like. No, I was very shy. I would often have, like a game or something, or I would just like chill around.
- [92:31]
Olivia Sui
My first video game experience was a gym daycare playing Spyro.
- [92:36]
Shane Topp
Oh, that's cool.
- [92:37]
J
I was like, Hoda.
- [92:39]
Shane Topp
Hoda.
- [92:39]
J
You know she is.
- [92:41]
Shane Topp
No, you're talking about.
- [92:43]
I
Oh, I thought that was a video.
- [92:44]
Shane Topp
Morning America. Yeah. Why are you like, Hoda?
- [92:47]
Ian Hecox
What does that have to do.
- [92:48]
J
Because I interviewed everybody.
- [92:51]
Shane Topp
So you. So you're. You interviewed the custodian. You also interviewed the liquor store. Yeah, like. And you were just a kid. How old were you?
- [92:57]
J
I wasn't interviewing them. I was just talking to them.
- [92:58]
Shane Topp
How old were you, though?
- [92:59]
J
Like, that was when I was 14, 13.
- [93:01]
Shane Topp
Oh, you just walk in and be like, what's up, Marty? And you'd be like, how's it going? How's your day going? He's like, selling alcohol. That's pretty cool. Can I have some? He's like, no.
- [93:11]
J
And then I started getting a car and that's when it got dangerous.
- [93:14]
Olivia Sui
Oh.
- [93:15]
Shane Topp
Cause then you would drive around all of LA and interview everyone.
- [93:18]
J
Well, no, no. Because then I went to this bookstore on Melrose and I met this dude and he was the first guy that he.
- [93:24]
Shane Topp
He was the first guy tried to ever met.
- [93:27]
J
No, he told me about, like, why am I being so random right now?
- [93:31]
Olivia Sui
Please.
- [93:32]
J
Like, they, like, they, you know, like, there's a form of art, performance art, where they would put hooks in their bodies.
- [93:39]
Shane Topp
In their bodies and dangle from a.
- [93:41]
I
Stuff, like the weird stuff.
- [93:43]
Shane Topp
And so this guy that you met at a bookstore would do that?
- [93:45]
J
Oh, no, no, no. He was the person. Okay. When I was 16, that was actually the second most memorable guy.
- [93:51]
Ian Hecox
What happened?
- [93:52]
J
The first guy was actually I met at an amoeba. You know amoeba?
- [93:56]
Keith Leak Jr.
Yeah, I know amoeba. This guy.
- [93:58]
Shane Topp
Amoeba's a giant record store.
- [93:59]
J
Yeah. It's about to close down. But I forgot his name was. I forgot his name already. He had curly hair. Anyways, he introduced me to a lot. I know this sounds really creepy, but we were truly friends. I look like a little boy. Anyways, so, like, there was nothing like, is that better? No, I was very, like, not scary, you know? And he introduced me to a bunch of awesome movies. And then he also was like, oh, yeah, I'm also making a documentary about people who were in Psycho.
- [94:33]
Olivia Sui
The movie Psycho? Yeah.
- [94:35]
Ian Hecox
And then I met him.
- [94:36]
Shane Topp
That's a long time ago. You remember these conversations? Yes, but after these one meetings.
- [94:42]
J
They were not one meetings.
- [94:43]
Shane Topp
You would be consistent friends with these people?
- [94:45]
J
Yeah, we're Facebook friends.
- [94:47]
I
Wow.
- [94:47]
Shane Topp
You still talk to these people?
- [94:48]
J
No, absolutely not.
- [94:51]
Shane Topp
Absolutely not. They're absolutely insane.
- [94:53]
Keith Leak Jr.
That's insane.
- [94:53]
J
They're insane. But I remember being so. Because when you think about it, I grew up in a bubble, and then I would go out into the city and I'd meet a bunch of people, and obviously I would like to know about their lives.
- [95:02]
Ian Hecox
Wow.
- [95:02]
J
Because they lived a life that I didn't.
- [95:04]
Shane Topp
I have to admit this. You make a lot more sense now. Like, who you are makes a lot more sense now that I know that your childhood was a Diablo Cody movie. You were just walking around reading like, yeah, my best friend's a janitor, a stripper, and a liquor store owner and a guy who dangles from hooks.
- [95:22]
J
Dude, this guy invited me to a show, too. I was like, oh, no, no, no, I can't.
- [95:26]
Ian Hecox
Wow.
- [95:26]
I
Is it called chandeliering? What is that called?
- [95:28]
J
I don't know what it's called, but because this guy had a lot of body jewelry on him, and then he was telling me more and more and more, and I think they didn't have an outlet. You know how many customers go to their store and ask them about what they do outside of the store?
- [95:41]
Shane Topp
Yeah. Well, I'm not a bookstore. I'm assuming people are gonna ask about books.
- [95:45]
J
Yeah.
- [95:46]
Shane Topp
Hey, this book's really good. Do you hook, put hooks in your body and hang in the ceiling ever?
- [95:53]
J
I remember this comment.
- [95:54]
Ian Hecox
Wow.
- [95:54]
Courtney Miller
No one's ever asked me that before.
- [95:56]
Shane Topp
You're never gonna believe this.
- [95:58]
Ian Hecox
That's my passion.
- [95:59]
Shane Topp
Wow. You wanna be best friends for. Right. But then we'll just be Facebook friends later and I'll never talk to you again.
- [96:06]
J
I mean, it's. I learned. I mean, I liked. I enjoyed doing that way more than being at school.
- [96:15]
Olivia Sui
No, that's awesome. Because my days after school were so fucking boring. At the high school, life should have hung out with me, ignoring Johnny Wow.
- [96:23]
Shane Topp
My life is nothing compared to yours, Olivia.
- [96:26]
Olivia Sui
You were in LA too.
- [96:27]
Shane Topp
Not until I was 16.
- [96:29]
J
You could have hung out with me.
- [96:30]
Shane Topp
We probably hung out. We probably were.
- [96:33]
Olivia Sui
You have a lot of, like, similar friends.
- [96:34]
Shane Topp
We have a lot of similar friends that we were probably at the same party at some point.
- [96:37]
J
I was not. I was out.
- [96:38]
Shane Topp
You were off hanging out with Hook Master Jim. You were hanging out with the mime you met at Best Buy.
- [96:47]
I
Yeah.
- [96:50]
J
But even now you could ask Sam too. Even now, like, I love, like, meeting people and just asking them.
- [96:56]
Shane Topp
Yeah. You're a very curious person and you love to, like, talk to people and ask questions. I believe that's the thing. I believe everything you're saying. I know you're not making this up and that's why it's so insane and funny to me.
- [97:08]
Ian Hecox
Well, that does it for the trip down ol smoshcast memory lane of 2019. Guys, this again. This was our first ever year of doing podcasts. We had a whole heck of a lot of fun. I love all my friends just bringing them in here, talking about stuff, sharing weird things with you guys. I hope you guys learned something from it. Or at least we're just entertained. It's been a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to 2020 podcast and some more. So if you're not subscribed to SmoshCast yet on any of the podcast listening apps, go do it. Rate us five stars. Help help the grow the Smosh family. And also check us out on the YouTube. That's YouTube.comsmoshcast and you can see our pretty faces while we talk. I don't know why you'd want to do that, but you know, if you want to see this stupid face, I'm looking forward to 2020. I'll see you guys next time.
- [98:23]
Courtney Miller
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- [98:47]
Shane Topp
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