S2: #52 - Destigmatizing our Mental Illnesses

Summary

Podcast Title: Smosh Mouth
Episode: S2: #52 - Destigmatizing our Mental Illnesses
Release Date: February 26, 2020
Hosts: Shayne Topp, Amanda Lehan-Canto, and rotating Smosh friends
Description: Join Shayne Topp (short), Amanda Lehan-Canto (tall), and a rotating Smosh friend as we discuss what’s on our minds, what we’ve found on the internet, and other dumb ideas we’re cooking up.

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Introduction to the Episode

In episode #52 of Smosh Mouth titled "Destigmatizing our Mental Illnesses," the Smosh team delves deep into personal experiences with mental health issues, aiming to break down stereotypes and reduce the stigma surrounding conditions like ADHD, anxiety, and OCD. The episode blends heartfelt discussions with the group's characteristic humor, creating an engaging and insightful listen for both regular fans and newcomers.

Personal Experiences with ADHD

Kevin Rigg takes center stage in the discussion, opening up about his struggles with ADHD. He explains the dual nature of his ADHD—both hyperactive and inattentive—and how it affects his daily life.

Kevin Rigg [31:05]: "I have ADHD, and I have the ADHD that's the most fun in the sense of. So there's like, three kinds. You can have the hyperactive, or you can have inattentive, and then there's one that's a combination of both, and that's me."

Kevin shares anecdotes illustrating the challenges ADHD poses, such as his tendency to forget essential items repeatedly, leading to multiple trips out the door. He emphasizes that ADHD is often misunderstood as merely a personality trait, rather than a legitimate condition.

Kevin Rigg [33:05]: "I'll walk out the door, shut the door, keys were in there day after day after day."

Navigating Anxiety and Relationships

The conversation shifts to how mental health issues impact relationships. Kevin recounts how ADHD affected his romantic relationship, leading to misunderstandings and emotional strain. Through mutual recognition and research, both partners were able to understand each other better and support one another.

Kevin Rigg [47:09]: "We just cried. We just held each other and cried."

Keith Leake Jr. adds his perspective on anxiety, describing how societal pressures and the inability to say "no" can exacerbate anxiety symptoms. He shares a personal story about experiencing intense anxiety before meeting friends, despite regular interactions.

Keith Leake Jr. [11:18]: "I hate to get, like, pressure to do stuff. If I say no, it means no."

Overcoming Stigma and Self-Acceptance

The hosts discuss the societal stigma attached to mental illnesses and the importance of self-acceptance. Damien Haas emphasizes the value of open communication and setting personal boundaries to manage mental health effectively.

Damien Haas [21:49]: "You are not terrible for setting boundaries. I think that's part of the pressure..."

Keith Leake Jr. shares his experiences with others minimizing his struggles by attributing them to superficial traits, highlighting the pervasive nature of stigma.

Keith Leake Jr. [39:20]: "People be like, I must be ADHD too. I forgot. It's like. It's like, man, it comes out in so many small ways."

Managing Mental Health in Creative Roles

Balancing mental health with creative responsibilities is another focal point. Kevin Rigg discusses the demands of his role as the producer ("Shredder") for Smosh and how he manages his ADHD without medication by relying on habits and a supportive partnership.

Kevin Rigg [35:03]: "A lot of it is pure force of will. Like, once again, unmedicated. I don't medicate. So a lot of it is pure force of will."

Damien Haas relates by sharing his own journey with OCD and anxiety, detailing how transitioning to a less structured YouTube environment increased his anxiety levels. He underscores the importance of honesty and self-awareness in overcoming these challenges.

Damien Haas [34:31]: "I have to make sure ... I want everybody to know that this is the way that it's going to go, and you're not taking my word for it."

Coping Mechanisms and Support Systems

The hosts explore various coping strategies that help them manage their mental health. Kevin Rigg highlights the significance of exercise in channeling his hyperactive energy and maintaining mental balance.

Kevin Rigg [39:20]: "The big thing that I find for myself now too, that really helps boost me personally is like exercise of some sort."

Damien Haas talks about utilizing support from friends and online communities to navigate his OCD and anxiety. He also emphasizes the role of partners in providing stability and understanding.

Damien Haas [37:56]: "And you know my OCD stuff... I have to like, I'm so sorry, man. Can you stop just crunching?"

Breaking Down Stereotypes and Encouraging Dialogue

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to debunking common misconceptions about mental illnesses. The hosts address how terms like ADHD and OCD are often trivialized or used inaccurately in everyday conversation, urging for more informed and respectful dialogue.

Damien Haas [40:16]: "But I think it's so ... you've got to just ... communicate that honestly."

They also discuss the importance of challenging others gently when they exhibit insensitive behavior, fostering a more supportive environment for those with mental health conditions.

Keith Leake Jr. [42:04]: "But you still have to watch that. You have to watch that."

Advice and Encouragement for Listeners

Towards the end of the episode, Kevin Rigg offers heartfelt advice to listeners dealing with ADHD, emphasizing self-worth and community support.

Kevin Rigg [47:31]: "While your ADHD is a part of you, you are not your ADHD. You are an awesome person... you can do it and just work hard and know that you're not the only one out there. Come on, dude."

Damien Haas echoes this sentiment, highlighting the importance of shifting one's perspective to view mental health challenges as potential superpowers rather than limitations.

Damien Haas [39:55]: "Whatever someone deals with mentally, there are ways you can sort of shift it to be more like a superpower."

Conclusion

Episode #52 of Smosh Mouth provides a candid and compassionate exploration of mental health issues among the Smosh team. Through personal anecdotes, honest conversations, and mutual support, Shayne, Amanda, and their guests effectively destigmatize mental illnesses, offering listeners both understanding and practical advice. The episode serves as a testament to the power of openness and the importance of addressing mental health in all facets of life.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Kevin Rigg [31:05]: "I have ADHD, and I have the ADHD that's the most fun in the sense of..."
• Kevin Rigg [33:05]: "I'll walk out the door, shut the door, keys were in there day after day after day."
• Keith Leake Jr. [11:18]: "I hate to get, like, pressure to do stuff. If I say no, it means no."
• Damien Haas [21:49]: "You are not terrible for setting boundaries. I think that's part of the pressure..."
• Keith Leake Jr. [39:20]: "People be like, I must be ADHD too. I forgot. It's like..."
• Kevin Rigg [35:03]: "A lot of it is pure force of will. Like, once again, unmedicated. I don't medicate..."
• Damien Haas [34:31]: "I have to make sure ... I want everybody to know that this is the way that it's going to go..."
• Kevin Rigg [39:20]: "The big thing that I find for myself now too, that really helps boost me personally is like exercise of some sort."
• Damien Haas [37:56]: "And you know my OCD stuff... I have to like, I'm so sorry, man. Can you stop just crunching?"
• Kevin Rigg [47:31]: "While your ADHD is a part of you, you are not your ADHD. You are an awesome person..."
• Damien Haas [39:55]: "Whatever someone deals with mentally, there are ways you can sort of shift it to be more like a superpower."

Final Thoughts

This episode not only provides an intimate look into the lives of the Smosh team but also serves as an educational platform for listeners to gain a deeper understanding of mental health. By sharing their vulnerabilities and triumphs, Shayne, Amanda, and their guests foster a more empathetic and informed community. Whether you're battling similar issues or simply seeking to broaden your perspective, episode #52 is a valuable listen.

Transcript

[Kevin Rigg]

Ramble.

[Damien Haas]

So me saying, I'm weird with touch, that's not true. I love hugs. I love high fives. I love handshakes. I love, like, putting my arm around somebody and vice versa. It was also me just sort of falling on my sword and being like, I don't want to make this a big deal. So, hey, everyone, I'm weird with touch. Will that be enough for you to not grab my ass at a workplace?

[Kevin Rigg]

I had always dealt with ADHD as myself and friends, not with a relationship. And I was, like, in bed researching it, and it was like, column for column exactly how we both felt. And we just cried. We just held each other and cried.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Some of the things that we say to one another, like, certain things that just stick. I'm like, mom used to call us ugly.

[Kevin Rigg]

She said.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I never said that. I said y'all were funny looking.

[Damien Haas]

Ori, we going to Australia or.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, no, that's not.

[Damien Haas]

I'm gonna eat a koala.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, that's. No, you can't eat koalas.

[Damien Haas]

I'm gonna try my best.

[Kevin Rigg]

This is crazy. This is weird. Being on this side, I feel weirdly naked. Cause I can usually stare at, like, all the.

[Damien Haas]

You can't check yourself. You just gotta let go and enjoy.

[Kevin Rigg]

Am I. Hey, future me. Am I okay? Am I speaking right?

[Damien Haas]

Yes, this is future Kevin. Hello, everybody, and welcome to yet another smoshcast, hosting for the first time ever.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Damn. What is going on? I just got wrapped up.

[Damien Haas]

I say we leave it in.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Joining us as the host for the first time ever is me, Damien Haas. And the man that asked me to put on a soulful voice for the smoshcast. This is entirely his fault. Keith Leake Jr. Come on. Indeed.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

It's.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

It's like Smash Brothers. Like, Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah. Star Fox.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

No, it's like, Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Come on.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Say. Tell me. Say something. Just say something.

[Damien Haas]

Generally, birthday cake should be illegal.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay, another thing.

[Damien Haas]

Voting is important.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on. One more.

[Damien Haas]

The birds work for the bourgeoisie. Come on. There we go.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on. Right there. Let's talk about that.

[Damien Haas]

Speaking of talking about that, joining us for the first time today on this side of the camera is Kevin Rigg.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yes, hello.

[Damien Haas]

Hi, Kevin.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

N. I didn't do it right.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's a tough one.

[Damien Haas]

Come on.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. It's a.

[Kevin Rigg]

It's crazy being on this side of the. Of everything at this point. I mean. I mean, I have my own Camera. So you can usually see me kind.

[Damien Haas]

Of a little bit. You're laughing, but you're known as the Shredder. You. You produce. You edit.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yes.

[Damien Haas]

Where's the. Where's the sh. Part come from?

[Kevin Rigg]

Is the shoot, actually.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, you.

[Kevin Rigg]

I get behind the camera too, so I shoot. Produce at it.

[Damien Haas]

Nice.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah, Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

It sounds a little less and like, not as bad as saying predator. In today's 2020, you can't be called.

[Damien Haas]

A predator because that is the actual term.

[Kevin Rigg]

It is the actual title. If you look at. If you look at my paperwork, it says Predator. So legally, I am. I am a. I am a predator.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

No, don't. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Don't. Come on. So that's why I go as the Shredder. I just don't feel as dirty.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Okay.

[Kevin Rigg]

I'm a Ninja Turtles villain.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. I was about to say, like, oh, no, Shredder's attacking after pizza. We should stop it.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Because I actually watched the Ninja Turtles, but not the. The one where they were like, in like costumes, like from early 90s.

[Damien Haas]

I had that on VHS.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I asked that too. And I was. I would always look for. And then they started doing that animated, like one. And that was a little. I didn't like that. So I just let them go. Really?

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. They were my thing for a long time.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Really?

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. I don't know. I grew up with very specific cartoons because I lived in Germany for the first, like, few years of my life. So I think the things were that were accessible there on like, American TV were like Sonic the Hedgehog Ninja Turtles, and I had Mega man on the Game Boy. So those were the big three for me at that time.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Nice.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Come on. Indeed.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, I did.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Sorry, sorry.

[Damien Haas]

I like that. So this is a new. This is a new catchphrase for you.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on. Oh, yes, indeed. So, like, my friend, like, she came up with it. I was saying some stuff and it was like years ago. She was like, come on. And it was like, you know, almost like you're in church and you're just like giving, you know, somebody some like, you know, a little like, no, it's.

[Damien Haas]

Definitely a hype up. Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

But I totally stole it and it is mine now. So I came up with come on. So if you guys, like start saying come on. Definitely give me my credit.

[Damien Haas]

What spurred that change for you? If she made it up years ago, why now?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Because she does. She's not saying it. And this is the thing. When you let things go like that, something that should be said. See the reason I didn't, like, say it earlier is because I thought it was hers. I thought it was her.

[Kevin Rigg]

She forgot to renew her copyright.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Exactly. So now it's mine. So come on. Come on with the question.

[Damien Haas]

There you go. That's perfect. I mean, hey, look, this could be huge for you. There are situations of, like, major websites not renewing. In time someone snags that domain, they sell it back to them. If she ever wants to say that again, you're going to be rich.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on. Hey, y'all heard, but do you hear me, though?

[Damien Haas]

We. We are like so many come ons in and we are.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on, Zins.

[Damien Haas]

Come on. That actually made me burp. Processing. That made me go like. Like something had to come out of my body to let that information in. Kevin, do you have any catchphrases?

[Kevin Rigg]

I don't think I do. I don't know. I don't. I don't monitor myself that often. I'm not in front of the camera as much, so I don't get to be like, oh, yeah, there's my catchphrase. There's me doing that thing. I. I do like a, like a punchy thing.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, I do that too, though.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, it's okay. So it's not. It's mine.

[Damien Haas]

No way.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Is.

[Damien Haas]

Well, no, it's like, you're a bully.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, no, I'm a bully.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You're a bully.

[Kevin Rigg]

It's. No, it's how. It's how I hype myself up. If I'm going to do like a workout, if I'm going to do something, like, I got to do it. I'm like an anime character. Yeah, it's me, like, focusing my chakra and so it's usually my, like, you.

[Damien Haas]

Like, grin on one side of your mouth. Like, let's do it. Punch the hand colored chakra.

[Kevin Rigg]

Is that like a purple?

[Damien Haas]

Oh, like a, like a deep purple.

[Kevin Rigg]

Like a royal.

[Damien Haas]

Yes, the royal purple. Like the purple dye made by the ancient Phoenicians for their royalty.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Could you say that with the soulful voice that we were talking about?

[Damien Haas]

Like the purple dye made by the ancient Phoenicians for their royalty.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Come on. Indeed.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's like some ear candy right there.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, ear biscuits.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, no, we're on a different set completely.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, got it.

[Kevin Rigg]

Oh, no. But you do.

[Damien Haas]

You do have a catchphrase, though. Usually when you enter the office, you just very loudly, like, do like one of those power stance and you go, hey, baby, tell me that's not real.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I didn't like Baby.

[Kevin Rigg]

Every time I walk in.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Look, I was not going to be supportive of that. Like, we were going to have to talk of that.

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay. If we're being supportive of your. Come on.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come.

[Kevin Rigg]

No.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay.

[Damien Haas]

Come on. Yeah. Kevin said you sound like a fighter game character. And I would have to agree. Smash bros or otherwise. When you say come on. That kind of deal.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like, could you set me up with some people? Cuz I know like, you do.

[Damien Haas]

I would love to. I have to work on that for myself first. My friend. I have not done any fighting games. I want to so bad.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's selfish. That's not a commone. That is called selfishness. Oh, I just asked you for help. You say I'm trying to help myself.

[Kevin Rigg]

It's not.

[Damien Haas]

Well, I can't help you until I help myself. I can't make those connections if I don't have them.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on. Yeah, I'll give you that. Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

I haven't done any fighting games. I've only done. I've done a lot of, like, shooting games. I haven't done like any RPG's. Your favorite one that you've done, definitely Fortnite. I'm in. They have two modes. The battle royale one, which is like, you know, ninja and all them playing that. And then there's save the world, which is like the cooperative story mode.

[Kevin Rigg]

You did like the demon guy, right? Was that you?

[Damien Haas]

I. I did lots of things. I did a. I did a werewolf. But, like, my main dude is named Dennis and he's been on. Been in the game for, like, years. Like, I've been going in every other month or every month for like, years, even before Smosh. And it's just so much fun. He's like, fun to play because he's dumb as hell, but has these just like little nuggets of wisdom every once in a while. And the dude who writes the game is actually so, so smart and so funny. So I don't know. I love playing that character.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, it's fun to do a. Do a. Do a Dennis voice.

[Damien Haas]

This is my Dennis voice. And I know that we talked about me not going outside, but also I'm surrounded and I need help. Like, it's. Everything he says is very, like, metered and measured and he's just.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, that's really fun.

[Damien Haas]

That's so cool.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, I don't. I don't play Fortnite enough. So it's a save the world or.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, save the world. The funny thing is I like, played the game originally when it was out on beta, before Battle Royale was even a thing. And I don't think I ever got to hear my character at that point. Like, I saw my character's face, and I was like, oh, I'm going to be, like, rescuing him soon. But it was, like, kind of far into the game, but now he's, like, in every single situation. So if I went back and restarted my account and, like, got there, I don't know. I. I don't think I've ever heard myself in a game. Just randomly. Oh, no. When recording for Smosh one time, Grand Theft Auto. I'm a cop. Yeah, you're a cop. Yeah, I was. I was a mean guy, too. It was a big old mean man. Big old mean man. Yeah. But anyway. Me, me, me, me, me.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah, no, we're all about it. Tell us more. Oh, so, Damian, so you just went on tour? Please tell me.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. Oh, it was so much fun. It was a great experience. We knew we were going to be exhausted from doing that, but it was very well worth it. We did five cities in a week, which was wild.

[Kevin Rigg]

I saw that, like, looking at that schedule, I was like, oh, cool.

[Damien Haas]

Five cities.

[Kevin Rigg]

They're gonna hit it. Like, they got, you know, a couple weeks to do it. And I saw the schedule. It was like, city, city, city, rest city, city. And I was like, you guys.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah, Beyonce can do it. So can you.

[Damien Haas]

That's. Well, what. Beyonce is, like, the pinnacle of humanity.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Well, many of y'all did some Beyonce shit.

[Damien Haas]

Well, thank you.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Kudos to y'all.

[Damien Haas]

We held a Beyonce within us.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

A Beyonce.

[Damien Haas]

A Beyonce.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

We held hands and had a Beyonce by.

[Damien Haas]

By.

[Kevin Rigg]

There goes. There goes. He just walked out angrily.

[Damien Haas]

By Keith. No, but it was great. I think the one challenge for me was sleeping on the bus.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I am usually, like, your alone time, too, and stuff. Right?

[Damien Haas]

I do. But that wasn't so tough for me, to be honest. I. I thought. I. I thought that would be the thing, and it really wasn't. It was just a matter of, like, the. The bunks were stacked. Three high top bunk is usually the least desirable. But I wanted it because it didn't really matter to me. And I, like, knew that other people would not want it. But every bit of the motion, if you just hit, like, a bumpy part in the road, like, your bed is vibrating and shaking, and there's no lip on the bed to, like, stop you from falling out. So, like, you're, like, subconsciously flexing your core all night to try to, like, not flip over.

[Kevin Rigg]

You Got shredded abs now.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, yeah. They're just hidden behind. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Hidden behind a bunch of awesomeness, you know?

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. Yes. Yes. My winter weight that is extending to spring. But, yeah, it was. It was. I'm also a little bit claustrophobic, so I had some, like, panic attack kind of situations.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, no, thank you.

[Damien Haas]

Not fun. It looked and felt like a coffin.

[Kevin Rigg]

I saw pictures of it. That was. That was terrifying. I'm like. I'm not, like, quite as claustrophobic, but I get, like, really weird if I get. If I can't move.

[Damien Haas]

Exactly.

[Kevin Rigg]

I can't move if I'm, like, stuck. I'm, like, not scared of small spaces. You put me in a small space, but let me move. I'm fine.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Right?

[Kevin Rigg]

But you tie me up or you bunch me.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. So that's exactly what it was. It's exactly what it was. Because I kept having these thoughts of, like, I'm fine in a small space until I have the thought of, like, you're here and you can't not be here. Like. So just to remedy that, there are these, like, soundproof curtains that were in front of every bed that, you know, you could pull closed. So I had to, like, sleep with mine half open with my hand off my bed to be like, look, there's more of a space that you can go into any time.

[Kevin Rigg]

Trigger warning for anybody with clusters.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, well, yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I didn't know I had any, like, issues with that, but I'm definitely getting a little anxiety. Really?

[Damien Haas]

For sure. For sure.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Getting a little bit. Starting to sweat.

[Damien Haas]

Is that something you often. Often deal with, just, like, anxiety?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah, actually, yes, believe it or not. So I hate to get, like, pressure to do stuff. If I say no, it means no. Like, yeah, I'm one of those people. Like, you can't, like, sway me. I won't change, like, what I'm thinking. Like, you know what I mean? I'll, like, give it a go. I'll, like. But usually I know if it's a yes or a no, so sometimes friends will be like, hey, Keith, let's go do this. I'm like, yo, man, I'm not in, like, the right, you know, like, mental space to do right now. No, man, just come on. Just like, bro, like, I need somebody there. Like, no, no, man. I just don't really want to. I, like, I'm not feeling it. I know if I come and hang out with you, like, I'm gonna, like, have a bet. I'm gonna be like, the.

[Kevin Rigg]

Just.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I'm gonna make it a Bad. Yeah, I'm gonna make it. I'm gonna make it a down situation. Just come on. Oh, my God. So now I'm starting to get, like, anxiety. So my. My heart. My heart is starting to be. I'm starting to sweat. I'm starting to pace a little bit, and then I'll just continue to get pressed. And I mean, I. The time I'm saying no, now I'm being, like, an. And now I'm, like, upset. But, like, I'm. I'm shaken up because I shouldn't be as shaken as I am. But, like, I go there because, like, I'm saying, doing all that I can to let you know that this is the way that it's going to go, and you're not taking my word for it. And it, like, that frustrates me, and it gives me anxiety to, like, the umpteenth degree. I can't do, like, even talking about it right now. I'm starting to get, like, it's a thing. Like, I can. Social anxiety. Like, I can usually be in, like, big crowds. I can, like, walk through. You know what I mean? I'd be like, hey, be the life of the party. But, like, when it's, like, a few people that I don't know, or it's like a small group, like, you guys are fine, like, whatever. But when it's, like, people that I don't know, I'm, like, on the inside, I am losing it.

[Damien Haas]

I feel that I'm losing it.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

One time I went to meet up with my friends, and I was in the Uber, of course, and I'm in the back shell, and these are friends that I hang with all the time, like, weekly. And I'm just, like, going through it. I'm like, hold on. Why am I starting to get anxiety? Like, what's going on? Like, what's going on? And this is the first time I really acknowledged it for what it was, because I'm, like, on my way, and I'm like, you know, they're like, yo, Keith, come. They're so excited to see me. Like, I'm so excited to see them. You know what I mean? I think at this point, just like, a year or so ago, and we had been filming, you know, for like, a couple days, and it was like the last day, so I went and hung out. And I'm just in the back of this Uber just, like, starting to get worked up, and I'm like, damn. Like, what did I do? Like, what's going on? Like, why? Like, is there a chemical Imbalance going on. What's going on? And then I got there and it kind of went away, but it didn't go away the way that I thought it would. It was so weird. Like, it was so weird. And I was just like, why am I doing this? Like, I see you guys, like, enough all the time. There's no reason I should have this right now. So then it started like this. It makes me question myself, like, what's really going on? Like, what's the. What's the root of it? You know?

[Damien Haas]

That's an interesting thing to bring up. If I may ask a question about that. If you are. Are so, like, set in your answer of like, no, I'm not going to do this thing. No, I'm not going to do that tonight. Obviously, it's annoying when someone keeps pressing you, but do you think the anxiety starts to kick in? Is there, like, a pressure because you don't want to disappoint someone or how they're going to view you for not. Because if their feelings aren't taken into consideration, you truly don't care what they think, and you're just saying no over and over again. It sounds like you're. You would otherwise be pretty set.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I mean, I want to be there for my friends, you know what I mean? They're there for me, you know? And, like, honestly, I'm the type of person, if I'm like, yo, come on and let's do something, my friends are going to do it with me.

[Damien Haas]

Sure.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

But I'm not always like that. But it's because of, like, how I know how I operate and how I move, you know, and how I maneuver. Like, what you guys get to see of me is not Keith all the time. The people that really know me like that, really, really know me know that I'll be in a corner by myself underneath the table. Don't bother me, you know? I mean, I'll come out and, like, talk to you what I want to, you know? But at the same time, I'm still, like, approachable. I'm not, like. But I prefer not to be in it like that, you know?

[Damien Haas]

I can relate to that very well. I have dreams all the time that are sort of like, there's a party going on in a place where I live, but I'm not downstairs at the party. I'm upstairs in, like, a really cool room, and I can just hear the music and hear the people, and it's like, it's nice. It's comforting. It's like, I don't Necessarily want to be down there, but it's nice to know that everyone's here.

[Kevin Rigg]

Right?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I like that.

[Damien Haas]

Isn't that interesting? I feel like I can.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yes, I'm on the same page with you like that like I could be in like a party setting or like in another room and, and hearing it going off. I'm cool. But like when people start to come in, I might act sleep.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I might act sleep. I might be like, okay, as soon as the door closes more. My phone. Yep. Is it like, okay, cool.

[Kevin Rigg]

Is it like a social battery kind of thing? Like do you have like when you go to those events or those moments, you have like a little bit of time when you're like cool with it? Like you're like, I'm here, it's cool. And then it like drains quicker. Like, because I know a lot of people have like a social battery. So like some people, like I, I'm like, weirdly, I can just go all night with my social battery.

[Damien Haas]

You definitely seem more like the life of the party. For sure.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, I can go. But I get my point too. I'll hit my point and I'll just know like, cool, I'm done. Like my social battery is drained. I'm going to go home. And it just depends on, you know, mood and day and stuff. But then some people don't have as intense like how you're saying, like with the, like being nearby but not directly in it.

[Damien Haas]

Right.

[Kevin Rigg]

Like that, that's kind of part of that too. So is that, Are you feeling like that like you have like a, like a social battle?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

This is the thing. If I know I'm getting into something, I'll turn it on and then almost forget sometimes also was like not like comfortable. And then I'll start making people laugh and I'll get that crowd going. I'm like, okay, cool. It's not so bad. I got a damn crowd. Like it's almost like a show sometimes. And like that's what I try to pull back away from because I'll find myself getting there and I want to be like authentic. You know what I mean?

[Damien Haas]

It sounds exhausting. If you feel like it's a show.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That you're putting on exhaust is so exhausting. And I just come on and I'll just. And I don't know, like sometimes I like, I kill it. And then there's other times where it's just like, okay, hey everybody, how you doing? Okay, gotta go. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Hahaha.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Bye.

[Damien Haas]

So even when you're Having fun. It sounds like there's a lot of pressure sometimes.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Sometimes. It depends on the circumstances. It depends on the people that I don't know that are in the room. It depends on who I'm meeting for the first time. It depends if I want to, like, if I'm in the mood to talk it. Like, I'm so. I don't want to say complicated, but I'm complicated, guys.

[Damien Haas]

It's. I'm like, if. Tell me if this is a scenario you relate to. You're going to hang out one on one with one friend, and you're, like, comfortable to do it. And then they check their phone and they go, yo, Jared and Benifer want to come over. And also they want to bring their friend Kyle. And you're like, it's the worst feeling.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Well, come on. Yeah, no dead ass. I hate that. So.

[Kevin Rigg]

Oh, really?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

I am so opposite. Really? No, I'm like, if. It's like me and a buddy, one on one, we're hanging out, and like, I feel like we reached that point. And then he's like, yo, hey, I got some friends want to hang out.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I'm like, yeah, let's do it.

[Damien Haas]

Wired differently for sure.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

For me, I'm the type. I have this one friend that he'll invite some, like, people, like, whether it be his cousins. It'll be like a group of people, you know? But then he'll, like, come over and be like, yeah, I'm inviting so and so and so and so. I'm like, bro, this is not even that type of crowd. Like, why would you do that Now?

[Damien Haas]

I want to go home, and I can't because I'm the asshole.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I want to go home, and I am going to go home. Look, peace out.

[Damien Haas]

Come on. But you're total opposite.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yes, completely.

[Damien Haas]

So. So are you the person that just gets stoked when new people are invited? Are you the one that says, you know what? This party needs more people and you are the inviter? Like, are you an organizer? Do you like to put things together?

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, I'm an organizer of that kind of stuff. I love putting that stuff together. I love being just constant. It's not even, like, center of the attention. I find more entertainment when a party builds, when people are having fun and making sure everybody's having fun.

[Damien Haas]

But see, we need people like you because otherwise we wouldn't get out of the house ever. There wouldn't be events without folks like yourself.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Get out of the house. It's just on my terms, right? This is the thing I don't know. It's so messed up because I've had certain friends that have pulled me out of my comfort zone. But at the same time, my comfort zone is my comfort zone. So it's. Ah, sounds so terrible. But it's, it's on my time. It's on my time how I like when I go out, who I go out with, with who I hang out with. It's like on my time.

[Damien Haas]

You are not terrible for setting boundaries. I think that's part of the pressure that at least for myself, I feel like if I have to say, like, I need a mean like, you don't always have to have an excuse for why you can't hang out. It's like, guess what? I just don't want to today. Yeah, right. Yeah. Matthew Scott, who's a good friend of Shane of mine, who you guys know, you know as well. And he's been here a few times now. Hi, Matthew Scott. Way back in the day, when Shane and I weren't so random, we had a situation. We were like, oh, Shane and Sterling and I are gonna go do this. Matthew Scott, do you want to come? And he just went, no. And then just walked away. And it was like, that was the first time I'd ever experienced someone. Like, you don't have to have an excuse. You don't have to be like, oh, Tuesday. No, I can't. It was incredible. And I've learned from it. It's like, you can do that. And I don't think less of him. He's awesome.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Okay, see that? I'm so down for that. And if somebody does that, like, I'm down for that. But like, just imagine having a friend who pressures you.

[Damien Haas]

No, that's, that's, that sucks.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's the angle that I never hit on that. And that's.

[Damien Haas]

I've never felt pressured.

[Kevin Rigg]

It's a fine balance too. It' hey, you wanna come hang out? Nah, it's cool. Don't even worry about it, man. We got another time. I'm not even.

[Damien Haas]

I'm not angry.

[Kevin Rigg]

You're not ruining my day. Like my. It would be fun to hang out with you, but I'm not hinging my emotions off of you showing up.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, see, that's. I think me and some. I got some like toxic ass friends.

[Damien Haas]

I mean, maybe, but in the best way.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like, they're my peoples, these are my peoples. But like there's some toxicity going on that we must relieve.

[Damien Haas]

Have you ever had a conversation about that with him?

[Kevin Rigg]

Hell yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I just had to tell them the other day, I said, don't do this no more. And they was like, like, no, honestly, I was like, it came out of nowhere, and it was just a little bit of. I. I seen something happen. I said, yo, please don't ask me for this anymore. And they were like, yo. They were like, I like, what's wrong? And I'm like, please. I said, you do this all the time. Don't do this, don't do this, don't do this. And I said, I know you're thinking I'm gonna be upset. Like, I know you think I'm upset, and I'm being, like, like, mean. But I said, I know. Like, but you being petty as, like, fuck, yeah. You're gonna, like, not want to talk to me, but I'm just letting you know, just don't do this out of respect, because, like, I feel so much pressure.

[Kevin Rigg]

Right. No, honestly, this is the thing.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

It drives me nuts because I let people know how I want to be treated. You know what I mean? I do that in all of my friendships. And sometimes it's harder because people have their own, like, things that they want. You know, it's just like, yo, no, get the out of my face.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, your time is your time. It's not theirs. And I think if you communicate that honestly. Come on, come on, come on. I think if you communicate that honestly and then someone still isn't, you know, respecting that, that's when it's an issue.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Sasha beat the ass.

[Damien Haas]

Yes. That's what I'm getting to in this.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on. Your back on this one.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, I got your back, Kevin. You're definitely a ride or die. I could, like, no joke. I could see you doing that.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

You're one of my best buddies. I don't know if you knew that.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Hold on. You guys went to, like. Where'd you guys go together?

[Damien Haas]

Went to Japan.

[Kevin Rigg]

Japan?

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like, who does that? Who just packs up and go to Japan for, like, a couple weeks, too, right?

[Kevin Rigg]

Well, I mean, my wife was there, too. Lacy was there.

[Damien Haas]

Hi.

[Kevin Rigg]

Hi, Lacy.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, it was a situation where, like, Shane and I had gone to Japan the previous year, and I was like, I want to do that again. Shane, what do you think? And he's like, well, it's going to be tough with, you know, smosh filming, and I've got the Goldbergs. I just don't know when it's going to happen. And I was just like, ah, that's okay. And he's like, yeah. I also kind of want to, like, Maybe try somewhere else this year. We've already done Japan. I'm like, that's fair. I still really want to go, though. And then I, like, literally that day went up to Kevin, and I was just like, hey, do you want to go to Japan? Hell, yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Let me just make sure it's cool. It's cool. It's cool.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's plane tickets right now. I was like, all right, let's get these plane tickets.

[Damien Haas]

Straight up.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Did it.

[Kevin Rigg]

And then, like, I go home that night. I'm like, oh, shit. No, this is happening.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Oh, no. Oh, wow. We're doing this.

[Damien Haas]

I got tickets.

[Kevin Rigg]

It was so much fun. The adventures were crazy.

[Damien Haas]

Absolutely.

[Kevin Rigg]

And then, like, you went off and you did your thing and got lost in the mountain.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, yeah, yeah. That was a fun thing. I don't know if I ever talked about that on a podcast, but basically, we started out together in Osaka.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yes.

[Damien Haas]

And I. And that was a city that neither of us had been to, and it was. It was fun. We did that for a couple days. But I started, you know, looking around Osaka, and I was like, man, I didn't know anything about Osaka. And mentally, in my mind, I was thinking it was more like Kyoto.

[Kevin Rigg]

I had a different. I had. That was the same image I had. I was like, kind of. I went to Osaka and I was like, this is cool. But, like, I thought there was going to be something different.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. I thought it was going to be rough rural, basically, and, like, with a lot of classic structures, but it was sort of the equivalent of, like, oh, I've done Tokyo before. New York. Why don't I go to Osaka? Chicago? And it was like, yeah, it's literally like, oh, another big city just on the other side of Japan. Like, I'm not takoyaki, though.

[Kevin Rigg]

Let's talk about that.

[Damien Haas]

Octopus hush puppies. Okay.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I'm like, what's this?

[Damien Haas]

And they. These guys added, like, savory, like, Rice Krispies on top. So good. But after, like, three days, I was like, you know what? I want that rural experience. And you had already done Kyoto, so was like, kind of. I think I'm just going to go do my own thing for, like, a week. And so hopped on a train, went to Kyoto, found a hotel that was, like, nice but not well known. So it was still bone cheap. And, yeah, just made my way for a week and got lost on a mountain. Fushi Inari Shrine, I think it was.

[Kevin Rigg]

Did you have two phones on you? Because I remember I was texting you during the moment that I was going.

[Damien Haas]

On and, like, one was a burner. One for the plug and one for the little ho.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on. Sorry, I didn't mean to just call you out like that on the podcast.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, we trapping.

[Damien Haas]

There was one that came with the hotel room is like a pocket WI fi. In Japan, you gotta have like, pocket WI fi either.

[Kevin Rigg]

Unless you have T Mobile.

[Damien Haas]

Unless you have T mobile. So, like, you actually have this, like, cell service WI fi that you just take around with you or another cell phone that use a hotspot. But that's the best way to travel. So, yeah, I got kind of lost on a mountain, but that even that was fun.

[Kevin Rigg]

I was like, I was legitimately. I was like a worried. Like, I was like a worried bud because I was like. I was like at home. I was in the bed, like. Because we went. We went over towards Mount Fuji when he was doing that. So I was like in bed with Lacy and I'm just like on my phone, I'm like, you think he's okay? She's like, she's like, I'm sure he's fine.

[Damien Haas]

It's totally fine.

[Kevin Rigg]

But, like, he hasn't messaged me back in like an hour and he said he was on a mountain and it's getting dark and he only had a flashlight and two phones. Hold on.

[Damien Haas]

What? No, no, no. It's not that bad, so.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

No, no, that sounds terrible.

[Damien Haas]

Imagine.

[Kevin Rigg]

Imagine me. I'm like, do you okay?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Do you understand?

[Kevin Rigg]

How are you okay, Damien? And then he. Then he texted me. He's like, man, it was fun. I got, you know, this and that. And I was like, well, first of.

[Damien Haas]

All, first of all, Japan is the safest place in the flipping world. True 2. It was tourist area that, like, it's the. Ever seen, like, a bunch of orange gates in, like, people's Japan photos? Like the. The like, thousand orange, like, gates that people just walk through. Anyway, I was there. Yeah, yeah, you get it. So it's like a big tourist spot and not everybody goes, like, to the top. And it was like a quite the hike to get there. But there's a path. There's like a path to do it. I'm not like, in the wilderness finding my way through this mountain. At the only point I ever got, like, kind of nervous. I was like, oh, man, it's getting kind of dark. Am I going to make my way down? Like, an old lady just, like, walks by me and I'm like, this is literally nothing. I'm being a baby. So the only scary part was, like, the Wildlife there you're not supposed to mess with. So there are all these signs that are like, hey, don't make eye contact with monkeys. They'll fuck up your life. And same thing with, like, wild boars. They're going to gut you.

[Kevin Rigg]

Or there's a. There's signs that show snakes, boars, monkeys, and hornets.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, I didn't know about the hornets. But the thing is, like, it's getting so dark. I'm like, am I making inadvertent eye contact with monkeys and just not knowing it?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Rob you too, right?

[Damien Haas]

I don't know if they're the rob you kind, but I think they're the, like, take your lips and show it to you kind.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Hold on. What?

[Kevin Rigg]

Hold up. No.

[Damien Haas]

All monkeys are terrifying.

[Kevin Rigg]

Extremely.

[Damien Haas]

Like, it's like, strong monkey.

[Kevin Rigg]

Strong monkeys. They got monkey muscles.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. But anyway, that was fun, and I felt like we got a lot closer just being buddies, and we would, like, meet up at little points along the way when we. You know, throughout the trip. Like, we had dinner in Tokyo and.

[Kevin Rigg]

Went and got beer there, too. We went to the Kai out in Tokyo.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Osaka was delicious that first night we rolled in. We got the yakitori, too.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Damn.

[Kevin Rigg]

It was an adventure that, like, that's the thing.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like, okay, so first of all, let me say this. I've never been out of the country, believe it or not. I don't think. Yeah, come on. I don't think. For me, if I were to go out there, like, I would have been, like, with you guys the whole time. You know what I mean? Like, I wouldn't have left the way you did that. I wouldn't have gone and experienced my own, like, situation. I would have just been like, okay, so this is a city.

[Damien Haas]

Sure.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Where's the drinks? This is nice. I don't want to be in the dark with some flashlight monkeys. Come on. Like, I don't want any of that. Like, you are very independent. Because, like, as much as, like, I might get social anxiety or, you know, like, I want to be by myself in those situations. Oh, I'm up under you. You know, I would not just.

[Damien Haas]

Well, the. The. The thing is, I'd been there once before, even though there were new cities. Like, I'd been to Japan. I. The train system is pretty easy to figure out once you get a handle on it. I know enough of the language to get by politely in, like, restaurants and.

[Kevin Rigg]

Stuff, you know, more than just enough. You. Your Japanese was like. When saw it just boosting. I was like, damian, like, how does Damien know That I don't even know that word.

[Damien Haas]

Damian, you taught me so much. I'd write down everything you'd say, and then I would.

[Kevin Rigg]

It was all wrong.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I would have went in there saying, gracias, Like, I wouldn't know what to say.

[Damien Haas]

Roso haso. Hola.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I'm like. I would have been cha cha and everything. I said, y'all do salsa? Y'all like salsa?

[Damien Haas]

Thanks. But it was cool to see you, too, because you are, like, you're so conversational with your Japanese, too. Like, I can speak politely like I've learned from a textbook, but you're very much like, hey, how's it going, bud? Let's talk and have a conversation. And that was impressive to me.

[Kevin Rigg]

I'm still. I'm not for anybody who. My Japanese isn't fluent. I learned enough to go through and learn and how to be conversational enough and talk. I just, like. I never practice it to as much as I should.

[Damien Haas]

Sure.

[Kevin Rigg]

Duolingo yells at me every other day. It threatens me. I think the other day it threatened to stab me.

[Damien Haas]

It was coming.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Hold on, KG kid. Somebody teach me something in, like, Japanese. Like, a word or something.

[Damien Haas]

Heaven's the senpai.

[Kevin Rigg]

All right. If you want to say, like, nice to meet you.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Nice to meet you.

[Kevin Rigg]

Say.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

It again.

[Kevin Rigg]

Haji.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Haji me mashte. Hajime mashte.

[Damien Haas]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

There you go. You just said, nice to meet you.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

How do I say, come on?

[Kevin Rigg]

Just like you said it just exo. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Damien Haas]

That's.

[Kevin Rigg]

Let's go.

[Damien Haas]

That's. Let's go.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on. Yeah, you could do that, too.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Exo.

[Damien Haas]

Exo.

[Kevin Rigg]

Exo.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Exo. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Welcome to Japanese Language podcast.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Hey, let's get it. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

But it was cool getting to know you more. We were fast friends when I started working here, but I don't know. I feel like I got to know you a lot more. I definitely got to know Lacy more. Your wife.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, she. She loved every bit of it, too. It was really fun for all of us when we're traveling and doing the whole thing, so. And then by the end of it, though, we were just exhausted.

[Damien Haas]

I was, too, man.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

How long were you guys out there again?

[Damien Haas]

10 days with travel.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

It was like. It was like a 12 day total trip, but we.

[Damien Haas]

We.

[Kevin Rigg]

The last, like, the tenth day was just because we kind of like the weird ebb and flow of time when you're going traveling in distance like that.

[Damien Haas]

And you just walk constantly. It's so great that it's so. Walkable but, like, I had. My legs were just so sore every single day.

[Kevin Rigg]

It was like jello.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

We averaged. I think I. I kept track. It was like seven to eight miles a day is what we walked.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I would be kind of down for that. Right.

[Kevin Rigg]

We lost weight. We lost weight during that.

[Damien Haas]

We were eating so much food.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yes, that sounds good. I'm going on a hike right after this.

[Damien Haas]

Hell, yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Definitely.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I'm.

[Damien Haas]

I kept finding, like, restaurants where I would be the only person in there, and it'd be run by, like, an elderly couple, and they were just, like, so stoked to see me. And, like, that's just a good feeling. And, you know, I love that kind of stuff. That.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, that stuff was so much fun. So, hey, Japan hit us up.

[Damien Haas]

We want to go back. All of Japan.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Invite me.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, actually, I think that'd be great.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yep.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

And speaking of getting. Getting to know you better, this is a bit of a segue, but we. We'd sort of talked about something regarding having you on the podcast today. There was some stuff you wanted to, like, talk about.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, yeah.

[Damien Haas]

Giving you the plat. I know that's. Yes, I know that's sort of a hard segue, but I'm like. We'd already. We'd already talked about mental stuff for a bit, so I'm just curious.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

I wanted to bring to the podcast a little bit, so I. Not many people probably know about me, so. My name's Kevin.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Hey, come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

I'm the shreditor. I sit behind the camera. I help produce things. You might catch glimpses of me. One time I drank some really nasty fish.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Eat it or eat it. But one thing about me is I have adhd, and I have the ADHD that's the most fun in the sense of. So there's like, three kinds. You can have the hyperactive, or you can have inattentive, and then there's one that's a combination of both, and that's me. So I'm hyperactive and inattentive. And so, yeah, I wanted to. Like, that was one thing I wanted to discuss at some point was like, ADHD and what it's like to be somebody with it and, like, what. How society looks at it.

[Damien Haas]

Well, I think that's awesome because, you know, we've talked about anxiety, we've talked about my ocd, we talked about body issues and. And. And sexuality and gender identity and all these different things. So I think this can only help people. But just out of curiosity. So for those People that don't know fully what ADHD is beyond what you've just said. Like, textbook wise, what does that look like day to day for you? Like, how might that affect what's an interaction that might be different for you than it would be different for someone else?

[Kevin Rigg]

Right. So a lot of like adhd, especially since I'm only speaking once again from having like the combination of happens. It's so weird because it happens in small ways and it's so subtle in a lot of ways that like a lot of people just see it as your personality. It's just you, it's just that. But then of course, me, I'm like, why? I didn't want to do that. I didn't want to be that person. I did it. And then you're just like, so you don't notice it in the moment you're doing something. So a good example is, Let me, let me just dredge up some examples. I have. Sure, I got a lifetime of them. I know I have to bring something with me. So to school, to work, to something I have to go to. Hey, remember to bring that object. So I'm like, cool, I need to bring that object with me. I need to bring that object with me. Need to bring, bring it, set it out, get it ready. I'm in the morning, I'm getting prepared. I look at the object, I'm gonna take that with me. Then I look over there and I forget that the object exists. And I walk out the door. And then I get to the place I'm like, that object. And it's not like, you know, everybody does that at some point. Everybody, shoot, I forgot that object. But this is like a daily occurrence to the point where like, I'll walk out the door, shut the door, keys were in there day after day after day.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Or I have to bring that object with me and I'll walk out the door, go back in, grab the object, go out the door, shut the door, lock it, realize I left my phone in there, go get my phone, leave, lock the door, realize, crap, I also didn't grab that other object I needed, go back in and grab it. So I'll exit my apartment three or four times. Sometimes if it's really bad, wow. Or like, it comes down to like the ability to just talk endlessly. So that is one of the problems too is like, if I've been drinking, like too much caffeine or haven't slept enough, my brain will just start firing and like, I'll just talk incessantly. So I've learned over the years methods to, like, corral myself in some of these ways.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. Because you have a very high pressure position. Like, you're. You're the shredder. But that. I mean, you are doing three jobs where sometimes maybe someone would have difficulty focusing on one.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yes.

[Damien Haas]

So how did you get from point A to here?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's awesome now.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. That's incredible.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I'm sorry.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, that's fine. Thank you. Yeah, it's. It wasn't. None of it's ever been easy. So I'm. For those listening and watching. I'm currently unmedicated. I've been unmedicated for. Since high school. Oh, wow. And that was on purpose. I just didn't like, personally. This is my choice. Anybody listening? If medication is your thing and you need it to help you, please, by all means.

[Damien Haas]

Hell, yeah. I was on medication for a while for OCD stuff, so Same. Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

So for my personal choice, I didn't like the way it made me feel. I liked the exuberance of my personality, my ability to be just random and all over the place, because it also brings a lot of skills and stuff to me. But it's. Oh, here we go. I forgot. What the question you asked. So there we go.

[Damien Haas]

I mean, so basically I'm asking. Point A is forgetting stuff, checking your door seven times. Point B is you are shredder for smosh. Managing a bunch of stuff that I don't think someone without. I think someone without ADHD would have a lot of difficulty doing that.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I would not. I'd be like, okay, well, okay, I quit.

[Damien Haas]

How did you do it?

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay, thank you. Now we're back on track. See, there's a really good example. Come on. So a lot of it has to do with just pure force of will. Like, if I. It sounds. So once again, unmedicated. I don't medicate. So a lot of it is pure force of will. A lot of it is building up habits. So I can never see when an ADHD moment's gonna happen. Just when we were talking, I forgot what you asked me. So I can never see when it happens, but I can recognize that it happened. And the difference is, in a lot of ADHD years, speaking for myself at least, are embarrassed about their ADHD moments. And so they won't. They won't say anything. They won't. They'll just, like, try to nod and smile and, like, realize they just missed half a conversation and then just be like. And then try to pick up. I've gotten so good at Picking up the last, like, sentence of someone said and inferring to the entire conversation, a lot of it is just putting in place checks. Checks along the way and being really open about it.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

So telling you.

[Damien Haas]

Hey.

[Kevin Rigg]

Hey. I forgot your question. Hey, I'm so sorry. You literally just said your name. I've already forgot your name.

[Damien Haas]

Sure.

[Kevin Rigg]

Hey, I know you just gave me this detailed rundown about this thing. I'm sorry. My brain ADHD moment. I do it to Lacey a lot, too. In fact, sometimes I find myself apologizing too much.

[Damien Haas]

Really?

[Kevin Rigg]

I'll go to say something so non sequitur, because my brain just jumped 15 times. And so you said the word. You're like, oh, I really like tea. And the next thing I know is I'm talking about some random thing that my brain leapt to. And I'll apologize, be like, hey, sorry. 88. 80. I just thought of, like, this one.

[Damien Haas]

Thing, I think we've had moments before where you're like, oh, man. And I was just like, no, that's what a conversation is. Like, you're bringing up the next topic. That's okay. Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Keep that shit going. Going.

[Kevin Rigg]

But so a lot of it. And to the point where I am now, it's like force. Like sheer force of will. And those checks and balances. So I go shopping, and I am an impulse buyer. Horribly impulse buyer. And, like, money has always been a struggle for me in a lot of things. And, you know, I love Lacey. She takes care of all that at this point. Like, I put my money in her hands, and I'm like, you. You. You know, whatever. You. You got this. I. I got your back. I'll help you budget sheets. But at the same time, like, yeah, you. You give me my allowance, otherwise I will spend it. All.

[Damien Haas]

Right.

[Kevin Rigg]

On a lot of ramen.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on, Ramen.

[Kevin Rigg]

So. So checks and balances. I go to the grocery store. I go impulse buying. I load my cart up of all the things I want, get to the checkout, and I stop myself, you know, outside the checkout aisle, and I look in the cart and I ask myself, what do I need from here? What do I actually. What was an impulse buy? What was fun to put in the cartoon? I is going to, like, kill me if I, like, not kill me, actually. But, like, you know, I shouldn't buy.

[Damien Haas]

Sure.

[Kevin Rigg]

And then we'll do that Lacy. And I'll go through the cart and move things aside and be like, okay, this is what I actually need. That stuff. We don't need it.

[Damien Haas]

I was just reaching so it sounds like you've got a solid toolbox of, you know, how to deal with things, but built up over time that you learned. Sounds like you've got a great partner who's understanding, helpful. I'll also say whether it's adhd, ocd, anxiety, what have you, you. I think people are more forgiving than you expect.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

Like when you're like, sorry, ADHD moment. It's just like, oh, I don't, I don't care. Let's talk about that thing again. That's fine. And you know my OCD stuff. The, the sound is a big deal for me. If someone's got like a water bottle and they're just talking and they're like, I think we should like go over to the other thing and start talking about whatever. And they're just absent mindedly crack and clicking. Like it, it really is like, it's, it's like static. Like if you're, if you think in terms of pictures. Pictures or words, all of a sudden it's just like, like taking it over and it literally just sends me into a thing. So I have to like, I'm so sorry, man. Can you stop just crunching? That can like, I'm so sorry.

[Kevin Rigg]

It's not from a place of, like, it's not from a place of anger and it's not from a place of you like hating them for it.

[Damien Haas]

But I get embarrassed and I have to apologize.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

And I'm that person that will do like crunch up and then like not stop or like if I'm in somebody's car sitting down and they like the seat belt sound. You know, I don't put on my seat belt, which always. Put on your seatbelt, kids. But like, I won't put it on and it'll be like, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. And I'll just be over here talking, listen to the radio.

[Kevin Rigg]

Like, yeah, Damien, I think you and I have a problem with ke, buddy.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

And then they're like, could you please just put it on? I'm like, yo, I totally tuned that out. So like I have that thing. It's. I have a cool skill to tune some stuff out that just like everyone else is annoyed with. And I mean rightfully so. So because I guess like under certain circumstances I would feel annoyed too. You know what I mean? Or be like triggered or whatever. The word is.

[Kevin Rigg]

The big thing that I find for myself now too, that really helps boost me personally is like exercise of some sort. Because I have, with a hyperactivity spot, I can have A lot. Like a huge boost of energy from nowhere. And I. To, like, calm and quell the storm in my brain. Sometimes I need to go on a run. I'll go. I'll get home and be like, I need to go to run. Or if I'm hiking or something, I'm like, I'm going to hike up this hill faster than anybody's hiked before. Like, I push myself to the limit. I've had to pull back a little bit just so I don't injure or hurt myself. But, like, exercise, I think, is like, also just like a great thing. And mentally for everybody, too.

[Damien Haas]

I think sometimes whatever someone deals with mentally, there are ways you can sort of shift it to be more like a superpower. Like, with that, you focus on that. And like, I'm going to push myself up with the OCD stuff, like, focusing really hard on one thing. It's like, what if I actually can get away from that noise and focus on this one thing I have to do when I have to get it done? It's rare that I'm able to do that, but when I can, it's just. It's a superpower.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

But I think it's so. I so appreciate you talking about this because, you know, you and I had a conversation about it maybe like a year ago that it's something that you deal with. Some of my best friends growing up had adhd, and I saw them through, like, different phase of being medicated and all that stuff. But even knowing that I didn't know the daily struggle, to me, it was just like, oh, that just means you're hyper.

[Kevin Rigg]

Right.

[Damien Haas]

Got it. Like, right.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's.

[Kevin Rigg]

A lot of people think, like, the joke everybody he makes about it is like the, oh, squirrel.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, squirrel.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, oh, squirrel. And they're like, oh. And then. Or the other part is like, people be like, I must be ADHD too. I forgot. It's like. It's like, man, it comes out in so many small ways. Like, it's.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I have a story about that.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, please.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

This is me. Like, because I. I was totally out of line. So, like, like you said in school and different things, you know, you have a hyper kid and it's like, oh, you. You need medicine. That would be a thing that was said. So I have this cousin who lives with my grandmother on. He. I. I'm pretty sure he had adhd. And if he had it, he had like a. Like a.

[Kevin Rigg]

Right.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

He was kind of like beyond just him having energy. He was kind of just like a bad Kid, too.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

And I remember I said that to him. You know, I'm like six years younger, you know, so. But he was just like, off. Off the walls. And I was like. I said, you need medicine. You need to take medicine. My grandma came down, God rest her soul. She's not with us anymore, but she came down and she said, don't you ever say that. She said, I have what he has. You know what I mean? She was like, I didn't know that she heard me upstairs, but she said, I have the same thing. I have to take medication. Don't you ever say that again. And this is the most gentle, calm, like you would never think. But just for her to say that, to come down and check me and put me in. Come on. And put me in my place. And to say, I have what he has. I take medication. I was like, oh, that's so. That's why I even look at it a whole different way, because that's not cool.

[Damien Haas]

Well, you're conditioned to say things like that. It's just. It just becomes. Becomes something that just comes out. Like, same with, like, the OCD thing. Like, someone's just like, oh, sorry, I'm so ocd. Can you actually do this? I do. I. But I also get it. Like, I don't like it.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

It's not okay.

[Damien Haas]

It's not okay. But it's something that's been said for so long so offhandedly that if someone says it, it be. It's just a product of them hearing it. So they have to be called out one time, be like, hey, that's actually not cool. And then they're like, oh, my God. Holy crap. I never even thought about it being that cool. It's just a thing that you say. Like, come on, come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

There it is.

[Damien Haas]

So I definitely have a lot of, like, forgiveness there. But I also know that, like, the form of OCD I have doesn't, like, ruin my life on a daily basis. Like, I know there are different levels to all of these things that, like, if it affected your every waking moment and made life agony, and then someone's like, I'm so adhd, then I'd be pissed. But, like, you know, I guess it's more of a luxury that I can be like, hey, actually, the thing you said.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, exactly. And that's what I was gonna say, too, is you. I mean, with your oc. Like, you seem to really champion through a lot of that as well. Like what?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like, he's gotten a lot better.

[Kevin Rigg]

I remember when you first seen him over the years.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Over the years. When you first got here, you were like, really weird with touch. I do know that. A lot more like, it was just like certain things, so.

[Damien Haas]

Funny story about that. And I appreciate you saying that. Funny story about that. I got off of my meds, like, cold turkey when I started at Smosh, and I also went through a breakup at the same time.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

So my anxiety was just like, spiking so hard. It wasn't even the OCD stuff so much. It was anxiety and it was really hard. And it was interesting being in this new environment where, like, I had come from a place of, like, TV and film that was very structured, very like, this is the way things done. And I had never done YouTube before, and it looks like that from the outside, but in reality it's like, you know, everything's crazy and wacky and people are trying to slate, but other people on set are still, like, talking and all that stuff. I was literally like, whoa, what? What is this? This is so weird. Like, in my mind, at first I'd be like, wow, this is kind of unprofessional, but it's just. No, it's a different profession. But point being, you know, we were doing like, summer games and people were weird with, like, touch with me. Like, there were a couple different people that worked here, and I'm not going to call out specific names, but they'd be like, haha, like, nipple tweak. Like, you know, oh, you got to watch out for that dude. He might smack your butt. And then I was. I was napping one time and like, someone like, trout legged me and just like, slapped between it. And so let's see, those are all things that are not okay. But I'm so aware of being like that OCD guy that calls that. I was just like, you know, it'll be a lot easier for people to stomach. Hey, I'm actually weird with touch. Not be like, hi, H.R. you have an employee that's worked for you for years that grabbed my nipples. Like, what the fuck? Like, in what possible place is that? Okay, so me saying, I'm weird with touch, that's not true. I love hugs. I love high fives. I love handshakes. I love, like, putting my arm around somebody and vice versa. I love that stuff. But it was just. It was also me just sort of falling on my sword and being like, I don't want to make this a big deal. So, hey, everyone, I'm weird with touch. Well, will that be enough for you to not grab my ass? At a workplace which is like, that's grabbing.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's not, that's not cool that you had to like, you know, put that in place.

[Damien Haas]

It's weird.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's. Yeah, that's, that's grossly inappropriate.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

It.

[Damien Haas]

Thank you. Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

So.

[Damien Haas]

So yeah, just for the record, I'm not weird with touch. Unless someone's just like, aha.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Nipples. Like I. That I really thought you were bad with touch. It was just like it started going around like, yo, just don't do like.

[Kevin Rigg]

I mean, you got, you got away, you know, and no, no touch there.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Unless you want.

[Damien Haas]

Well, for the record, I don't.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Unless almost touch your nipples. I would have got.

[Damien Haas]

Maybe it's me. I don't. No, no, no. I'm not going to name names. I'm not going to call out names. It's just a matter of like, I do look.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I, I, I touch. I do say I do touch. But I, I hope if I've ever touched you.

[Damien Haas]

You've never.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Okay. Okay.

[Damien Haas]

I just make sure. I love hugs. I love stuff like that. That's why it was so sad for me to be like, oh, it's careful everyone.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Damian doesn't like was so like, I was like, okay, so I just got to make sure I don't. Cuz I love hugs. You know, I give everybody hugs. I'm like, yo, what's up? So I was like, okay, Damien someone. I can't give a hug too. I'll remember that.

[Damien Haas]

I appreciate. I mean, in, in, in attempts to not in attempts to not make it a big deal. I also, I guess made it a much bigger deal of like, yo, did nobody touch this D?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You know, so that was, look, nobody was, nobody was touching after the conversations. Yeah, well look, well look. No more ass slap.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, right.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, it was a trade off off. It's like someone won't grab your chest, but at the same time you can never be hugged again, you know? But no, I mean, we're here and it's. It's been interesting for me to like confront all these things that like first impressions, whether it was like starting back at mythical or like way back in the day when people will bring something up. I'll be like, oh my God. Like I don't even recognize that version of me that I was like, that was an issue for people. And even you saying that now, like, oh yeah, we all knew not to touch you. I was just like, wait. Oh God. That was a thing. That's crazy. Like, you know, and it's sometimes Hard to break those conceptions, but all you can do is, you know, show people otherwise. Right?

[Kevin Rigg]

Exactly.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That was nice. Come on, come on, come on, come on.

[Damien Haas]

Kevin does Kevin. Awesome, y'all. That was. Thanks for. Is there anything else you want to say to the. The people out there who are watching who maybe have ADHD advice from like a senpai?

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay, here's my advice. It might get a little emotional for some people.

[Damien Haas]

Sure.

[Kevin Rigg]

While your ADHD is a part of you, you are not your adhd. You are an awesome person. It gives you lots of skills and it can help you with your personality in your head. You're probably gonna hate yourself and question everything that you do and think everybody hates you for it. It's not true. And you can do it and just work hard and know that you're not the only one out there. Come on, dude.

[Damien Haas]

That's so nice. I'm getting a little teary.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's really nice.

[Kevin Rigg]

Also.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Don't cry.

[Kevin Rigg]

Final shout out. Check out if you. If you guys want to find other like minded people with ADHD and hear other stories and how to work through stuff, there's a ADHD subreddit that I frequent on there a lot and they talk, they'll say, like, I had a problem with this today, or man, ADHD is, is really getting me with this. Or hey, I got medication today and I'm feeling better. Or hey, how do you guys work through this issue? The ADHD subreddit is amazing.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's awesome.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, it's. No matter what you deal with, it's always nice to read something or hear something and go, o, there I am.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah. That was a moment in my life where I legitimately, this is. Maybe I kind of bring it back a little too much. Lacy and I, when we were fresh on in our relationship, when we just first started dating, we'd had some issues and I had never been in a long term relationship with somebody, so I had never dealt with adhd. I had always dealt with ADHD as myself and friends, not with a relationship. We had issues. It was a rocky start and for a while we didn't know what was going on. It was like, was it her? Was it me? I was hurt. She was, was hurt. And then like, for me, I was like, wait a minute. I completely forget. I have ADHD sometimes. And I researched it and I, like, I was with her. I remember like, we were. We had just had a little like an argument and I was like in bed researching it. It had like point A, point B of like, who the person who has ADHD probably feels like this in the relationship, and the person with ADHD who doesn't and is dealing with it feels like this. And it was like column for column exactly how we both felt. And we just cried. We just held each other and cried. And it was like. But it was like that kind of stuff, like acknowledging it, being like, you know, this is me. And like, that was a road to like, working on a lot of really cool stuff in our relationship, in life.

[Damien Haas]

So that's incredible, man.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Held each other and cry.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, it was really.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That ain't. Come on. I don't know what is.

[Damien Haas]

I'm still not entirely sure what is, but I think that's one.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, man, I love you guys.

[Kevin Rigg]

I love you.

[Damien Haas]

I respect the hell out of you for coming on here and talking about it because, you know, we get comments all the time about, like, thank you for talking about this. You know, it's a nice little offshoot from the goofy comedy personality based stuff that we usually do where we can do even a little bit of good. I still get messages about the body image podcast. You know, when Shane and I talk about it, they're like, they're like, I've never heard guys talk about this before. I've never heard men say these things. And it was like, whoa, that was a.

[Kevin Rigg]

That was a really great moment. I was over there nodding my head constantly. Hell yeah, my neck hurt.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I think I gotta catch that one. I gotta look at that one.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, check it out. But it's a. It's similar to this where we just talk about insecurities, but it's Shane opening up, up about, you know, his own issues with his body. And I was just like, oh, hey, I actually like me too. And then, you know, so many people, regardless of gender, but, you know, there's a stigma around men specifically.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

We don't care.

[Damien Haas]

We don't care. It doesn't matter.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Anything, anybody. Like. And there's probably something somebody said to you or brought to your attention or like all of that stuff. Those things stick. Actually. I actually just had to tell my mom, so this is funny. She had said, like, just growing up, my eyes are big, right? So I have like really like big expressive eyes. And I mean, I had to grow into them a little bit. But like, beyond that, I just remember whenever my mom or like my sister's like, oh, my God, your eyes.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, that sticks.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, why'd your eyes so big? Boy, that.

[Kevin Rigg]

That's.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

But like the, the that's the thing. So, like you know, me and my mom were talking, and we're on the phone, and she had said something about my eyes. I said, you know what, Mom? I said, you used to talk about my eyes a lot. And I said, it really messed me up. Like, my eyes, my teet.

[Kevin Rigg]

Good for you, man.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

But then she was like. She said, I love your eyes. I said, well, you have to watch how you say. It's not what you say, it's how you say it. Because I thought that I had the. Like, the most gigantic.

[Kevin Rigg]

It creates a complex. Complex.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

She said, I love your eyes. And when she said that, I'm like, what did you just. When she said that, I just. I couldn't believe it. I was like, but you said it like, look at those eyes. Like, look at those men. It messed me up.

[Kevin Rigg]

It messed me up good for you for saying something about it. And then, you know, then she got to clarify, like, the conversation. Communication happened.

[Damien Haas]

So important. I forget even what it was about. But it was something almost exactly like that with my mom, like, a couple months ago, I was just like, hey, I don't know if you know this, but you always used to say things this way, and you said it kind of that way. Right now, you know, this is what that meant to me. So, like, it's funny how it doesn't always have to be an argument, but it's like, hey, just so you know, like, this is what you're doing. And it sucks that we have to wait till we're adults, sort of, because it's like, they're probably not gonna have another kid and give another shot.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

It's just, you know, like, as a kid, so you're just dealing with it. You know what I mean? You're just.

[Damien Haas]

You don't know any different.

[Kevin Rigg]

You're learning, like, social society, all that stuff.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You are processing so beyond anything. Like, why would you say something that you're processing, like, where does this come from? And then you hear it the same way. It's like, oh, this is because of this. It's because I messed up in this way. Oh, you like my eyes?

[Damien Haas]

Yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Whoa. Why did you say it with so much dislike?

[Damien Haas]

And even now, like, you can look back and be like, oh, it's coming from a place of, like, playful love. But when you're a kid, you don't have that. You don't have. You don't have context. You don't know.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You gotta watch that. You have to watch that. And I think, especially in the black community, we play so hard, hard with each other. Like a black person roast session. Like sometimes it's like fun and it's sweet and it's just like haha. But some of the things that we say to, we would say to one another, like even my mom, like, she's the best mom in the world. But like sometimes it's just certain things that just stick. And now I think, you know, like it's stuck. Certain things that, I mean it stick. I'm like, mom used to call us ugly.

[Kevin Rigg]

She said.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I never said that. I said y'all were funny looking.

[Kevin Rigg]

Mom, mom, come on.

[Damien Haas]

You just don't have the, you just don't have the perspective yet. But like as an adult you can, you'd say that to your friends. So like, you know, it's. You teach, you teach kids language and you teach them social interaction and all that stuff. But like, yeah, when you don't have a basis yet. Sarcasm and playful.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I just made my mom look like the most horrible person. My mom is the reason that I'm here.

[Damien Haas]

She believes in me.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

She gives me the utmost support, but.

[Kevin Rigg]

Hi, Keith.

[Damien Haas]

I think anyone who's ever listened to you talk about your mom knows that you have nothing but amazing love for her.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like she just messed up a couple times.

[Damien Haas]

Well, yeah, who's going to be perfect? The same thing with my mom. I, I love my mom. She's welcome to the wonderful and she was a wonderful mom. But I'm just saying, like, you still have those conversations, right? It's all good.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah, I love her. I'm going call her right. As soon as we get done with this. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

So actually I had a question to ask you.

[Damien Haas]

Please do.

[Kevin Rigg]

When is this airing? You guys are not quite in Australia yet.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, I can't wait though. I so can't.

[Kevin Rigg]

Australia.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, right. Ori, we going to Australia or. No, that's.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, that's not.

[Damien Haas]

I'm going to eat a koala.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, that's. No, no, you can't. What can you eat? Koalas.

[Damien Haas]

I'm gonna try my beast. I'm gonna go up to a tree and just kick it and if one drops down, I'm gonna catch it and then name it and then eat it. So it's harder on me cuz I'm named. It's. I'm so sorry everyone in Australia for doing that.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah, that was voice. Come on, they can cut it out.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, I'm not. That's mean. I'm not cutting it out. Kevin, don't cut this out.

[Damien Haas]

I know for a fact I can't. That's not a real Australian accent. That actually also comes from Matthew Scott. Oh, yeah, it was me. And so random days where he had this character that was, like, supposed to be an Australian model and it was based off of, like, him and his brother watching Australia's Next Top Model. And there was like one judge that said something to the effect. I'm just. I'm going into a friend's memory here. But, like is like, you have to do the beast pose. If you don't do the beast pose, you won't get the job. And so, like. And so he just took that accent and, like, bastardized it and then shared it with us. And that's why Shane and I are always like, or. But in reality, everyone on the show is like, we don't talk like that.

[Kevin Rigg]

He had. He did a character based off that that he had to do, like the crazy dance or something too, I think.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, do the Angus.

[Kevin Rigg]

I saw that clip and I was beside myself with how crazy that was.

[Damien Haas]

It was incredible.

[Kevin Rigg]

That dance was insane.

[Damien Haas]

But anyway, yes.

[Kevin Rigg]

Is it called Smash Australia?

[Damien Haas]

It is now.

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Okay.

[Kevin Rigg]

Australia.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on, Smash.

[Kevin Rigg]

So have you been to Smash Australia before?

[Damien Haas]

I've never been to Smart Australia or Australia. I am very excited for multiple reasons. I. People learned this about me on tour. My favorite part about traveling is trying new foods. Specialize I wouldn't normally get anywhere else. No. Not going on the bus. So I'm excited to see what Australia has to offer food wise. I can't wait to try, like, local specialties and things like that because that's part of how you experience and share culture. Food is so important. You don't even if you don't speak the same language, you connect through food. And that's a big deal to me.

[Kevin Rigg]

What food? I actually don't know what Australian food. I know. Shrimp on the barbie. That's all I know.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Barbie.

[Damien Haas]

I also feel like maybe that's not even.

[Kevin Rigg]

I don't even think that's real. That's all I know. Or what Outback Steakhouse has told me.

[Damien Haas]

You blooming onions. I can't even do an act. A Foster's lager into a can of vegemite and put it on a blooming onion.

[Kevin Rigg]

No, that's a Eat it or eat it Australia.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, I actually can't wait. Here's my thing about that. I know that, like, kangaroos are farm raised sometimes for food. So I was like, oh, maybe if given the opportunity, I'll try that. But I also know the wildfires have been insane and so much Wildlife was lost. So I don't know the situation there anymore. I don't want to be the guy. Guy that eats the last kangaroo. I. I want to just, like, be as, like, conservative as possible with my food choices there because I also don't like, you're. I don't want to do anything inhumane or weird, you know?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

No, no, no. Time is the time. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Why is that?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Not to do anything inhumane?

[Damien Haas]

Oh, got it. I thought there is never a right time to eat a kangaroo. Well, they're just like. They're jumpy cows. Like, that's all they are. They're just some jumpy ass cows.

[Kevin Rigg]

They're buff, though. They're buff.

[Damien Haas]

They will. No, I'm not going to find and track down a live kangaroo, like, running beside it, like, excuse me. Stop.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

What messes me up is they, like, stay like they balance on their tails.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, that's, like, weird.

[Kevin Rigg]

Their tails are their little things.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Good Lord. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Sorry. If I still had a tail, I would do that.

[Kevin Rigg]

Step back.

[Damien Haas]

And that's all the time we know. But I'm so excited for Australia. It's cool because we're doing supernova on both Gold coast and Melbourne. I know the days in between there, we actually have, like a fair amount of time to just sort of do nothing. So I was kind of concerned, considering doing my own thing again and kind of getting lost in a country where.

[Kevin Rigg]

That'S the place you don't want to get lost in.

[Damien Haas]

Though.

[Kevin Rigg]

They have deadly. Deadly.

[Damien Haas]

Well, I'm not gonna, like, drop myself on top of Ayers Rock and be like, Figure it out.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Like, oh, like, that's.

[Damien Haas]

That's Texas.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Am I gonna have to cut that? Is that a real song?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

If so, it was the Tech. Not. Theme song. The Texas.

[Kevin Rigg]

The Texas.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

It's a Texas theme song. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

It plays when every Texan wakes up. Because they live in a dystopian future.

[Kevin Rigg]

They fire their gun up in the air.

[Damien Haas]

I just want one morning where I'm not listening.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

If they try to own that from that. The world is coming to us.

[Kevin Rigg]

Texas, we actually love you.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

I drove through Texas. It took me 15 hours. It was amazing.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, yeah. I. I drove through, unfortunately, the top part of Texas, which is a bummer. Yes.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's why I don't drive. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah. I drove out from Georgia the first time coming out here, and Texas was the bulk of the drive. And it was just. It was like, you know, you hit Alabama and there's these beautiful fields and you Hit Louisiana, and there's all this swamp land, and, ooh, all this. Wow, look at America. And then Texas. And then it was like, whatever force was making America, like, got a phone call. Like, at least for the top of Texas. Texas is beautiful, but, like, I'm talking about. You listen to the sound of wind for 36 hours, you get to see.

[Kevin Rigg]

Some, like those oil. Oil.

[Damien Haas]

I forget what they call those. Like, little drinky birds. Yeah, oil. Drinky birds that actually make that oil. Yeah, oil. Oil derricks. Oil derricks.

[Kevin Rigg]

Oh, by the way, what's up? Brennan Brennan is taking over for me right now. Brennan. Hi.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Hi.

[Kevin Rigg]

Brennan is my. My twin brother.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

My twin brother with the better hair and the better beard.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

The better head and the better beard. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

So really quick. Going back to smash Australia. Wait, so where'd you say you guys were gonna go?

[Damien Haas]

We're gonna be doing Supanova, which is a convention.

[Kevin Rigg]

Oh, I didn't actually. I thought that was like a. Oh, that's a. That's a convention center.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, no, it's not a convention center. It's. It's like. It's like saying, I'm doing Comic Con San Diego or Comic Con New York, but it's supernova Gold coast and Melbourne.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Okay, when you say that is a.

[Damien Haas]

Here's the thing, man. I've said. I've said Melbourne many times. Then everybody goes, actually, if you were from there. Actually, the way they say it is Melbourne. And I'm like, well, I'm also not speaking with the accent right now, so I will say Melbourne. So people like Keith don't have to ask me when I'm talking about it, who speak American English, and that's who I'm talking to.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on. Well, you learn something new every day.

[Damien Haas]

But this is the one time someone has corrected me for that. So, like, now I just assumed, you.

[Kevin Rigg]

Know, you're talking about. You said it was such confidence freezer.

[Damien Haas]

That's the thing, though. Like, sometimes people are like, actually, if you order that thing in a restaurant, it's called. And I'm like, yeah, but if I have to ask about that, like, it's flipping. I don't know. It's so much easier to just say it how I say it. Like, don't you know those people who are like, yes, I'm going to go to an Italian restaurant and order the spaghetti. I'm like, you sound like an asshole. Maybe you're saying it right. Maybe you. Parmigiano.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I hate that.

[Damien Haas]

I hate it. I hate it so much.

[Kevin Rigg]

So you can. You're going to be in Australia doing those. And you guys still have tickets for sale, right?

[Damien Haas]

What's that?

[Kevin Rigg]

I'm promoting Australia right now.

[Damien Haas]

I think we do all the pro. So definitely come see us in Supernova, you know, and also in Melbourne. Melbourne and Gold Coast. So also, you know, we get a lot of messages when people say, like, oh, man, why didn't you come here? And you know, why not come to Adelaide? Nobody comes to Adelaide. Oh, man. This is like the first time that we have a group, as a group, at least for as long as I've been here or going out of the country. So, you know, you can't hit everywhere all at once. Especially cause Australia is a continent. I'll just say that, like, you know, if this does well, that opens up the door to, like, possibilities for other things in the future. This is us, like, dipping our toes in the water and it's people who are like, why aren't you scuba diving? It's like, well, we're gonna dip the toes first.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yay.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on, dip the toes, Dip the toes.

[Damien Haas]

Just a little toesy.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Just a little toe. Just a little moist up that little toe.

[Damien Haas]

Come on. But yeah, we're excited for it. If you have any recommendations for what to do, be it as a group or if I go off solo, or if you're like, no, Australia is more way dangerous than you think. Don't go off solo. Tell me. Save my life.

[Kevin Rigg]

Comment. Comment on this video as well. If you guys have any suggestions for Australia.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Where is that one? That one building that everybody goes to? Take pictures of?

[Damien Haas]

Sydney Opera House.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

That looks like a boat. Yeah, yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

This right on the wheelbarrow.

[Kevin Rigg]

You guys gonna. You guys gonna go check it out?

[Damien Haas]

I don't know, because it's. I know we're not going to Sydney, so. But it's like, do I go do that? Do I also.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You have time.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, we've got like a few days in between, so we sort of bookend our trip. We're doing like supernova. I forget if Melbourne. Melbourne or Gold coast is first, but one of them, and then we've got several days and then a different one. That's why I kind of want to go off on my own. But also I was thinking of asking for like a few extra days and being like, hey, when we're leaving, since I'm so close to Japan, can I just hit up Kyoto for like three or four days? But I'm right there. I mean, that's. That's a legitimate if you're going to fly across the Pacific Ocean, you got to make it. You got to get your. Really get your time.

[Kevin Rigg]

Very close, Very close.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I can go with you?

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are we going with you to Australia? Can we go with you? Damien, this is your call and only.

[Damien Haas]

Your call as the producer. King of Smosh king.

[Kevin Rigg]

All hail like a boss.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

All hail like or as a boss.

[Kevin Rigg]

You guys have been doing the canceled segment.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

And I want in on that.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, okay.

[Kevin Rigg]

We should do the cancel.

[Damien Haas]

Keith, have you. Have you been party to this cancel?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on, lay it on me. What is it?

[Damien Haas]

So we're basically canceling somebody. What's the thing? We're canceling the week. And it's not necessarily like this person's bad bad, but it's like, I'm canceling when you're waiting too long for your Postmates order and it then they cancel on you. I'm canceling that. Like, it's just something you're done with this week.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, okay.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah. So what are you. What are you canceling, Keith?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

So, like, since we're talking about orders, I am canceling Uber Eats making all orders under 15. $3. $3 delivery fee. What is up with that? That is not a come on moment. That is a Don't do that. If it says 149 for something, it should be 149. If it's under 15, $15. And just because it's under 15 doesn't mean it should be $3. Three dollar delivery fee. Come on.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah.

[Damien Haas]

Is that. Do you have the, like, unlimited service and that you still have to pay on top of that?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

See, that's the other part about it. Yes, I have to pay that too. So, like, if I'm paying this and that, there's no reason I should get it to 15 just to like, spend a dollar less.

[Damien Haas]

Yes.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's crazy. That. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

I do that. I do the Postmates Unlimited, but it's the same thing. If it's under $15, there's a delivery fee. But so many restaurants have figured that out, out. And they're like, we only offer 10 kinds of sandwiches and each sandwich is 14.95. So you're like, I have to order.

[Kevin Rigg]

Two sandwiches to make that bag of chips. I didn't want those chips and soda.

[Damien Haas]

But guess I'm getting some good.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

So that is canceled cancel. But I'm order some stuff tonight. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Shout out to each of our individual delivery services, please hit us up for sponsorship.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yes, Kevin.

[Damien Haas]

What's canceled? You're excited to cancel something? Yes, yes.

[Kevin Rigg]

I want to cancel having to untie your shoes all the way to take them off.

[Damien Haas]

Oh, yeah.

[Kevin Rigg]

Like, I. It's like I'm all about, like, slipping shoes on. Slip them off. I like shoelaces because they look cool when you tie them the right way.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

But.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on, like, my feet. You got to take them all the way off. You're like, I want my shoes off now. I don't want to have to tie. And then you have to tie them all the way back up.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Do you know what you should do? So you lace them up like, you know, like, lace them up like, regular. But you just put the shoestrings on the inside instead of, like, tying them. So when they go on the inside, from the outside, they're already in your shoe and you just, like, put your foot on them.

[Kevin Rigg]

And then I. I don't have to tie them all the way then after that, too, because I got some nice boots with Damien when I was in Japan. I love them. They're amazing. But, like, sometimes, like, I just don't want to deal with them. So I cancel taking shoes off all the way with the laces. I said it right.

[Damien Haas]

I did it, right.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I did that. Just come on to my house and I teach you some stuff.

[Kevin Rigg]

Yeah, teach me later. Please do it.

[Damien Haas]

Learn him something.

[Kevin Rigg]

Damien, what are you canceling?

[Damien Haas]

Oh, man. I didn't know we were canceling anything this week. Nothing too big. But I think I want to cancel thrift stores that don't wash the clothing enough.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

They never wash. No, never. They clean. They like, do some.

[Kevin Rigg]

They put something or something. Right?

[Keith Leake Jr.]

They do something like that, but they never wash it. They're not spending no money on that.

[Damien Haas]

They need to have an industrial size washer in the back and do that because I. We went thrift shopping in, I think Portland or maybe it was Seattle on tour, and I found, like, four clothing pieces that I really liked. Like, one was a really good quality jacket from a good brand, and I was like, damn, this is awesome. But then I, like, smelled it, and it had that, like, mildew, like, teenager who hasn't figured out deodorant yet kind of smell.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Wash them all, bro. They're not.

[Damien Haas]

How gross.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

They're not, like, I don't think. I don't believe thrift stores actually wash. They put, like, some stuff on there to make it smell better and do like.

[Damien Haas]

They didn't put enough on.

[Kevin Rigg]

They just. They just Febreze it.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, I'm canceling it because, like, you don't know if that comes out. Like, sometimes with that kind of smell, it might not come out with a wash. So if I knew for a fact they washed this and it didn't come out, you know, then it'd be fine. But I. I didn't know, so I didn't get it.

[Kevin Rigg]

Have you.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You watched it?

[Damien Haas]

Oh, I didn't buy it.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

You didn't buy it?

[Damien Haas]

No way. You would have been smell like ass.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Yeah. Come on. Ass.

[Kevin Rigg]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Well, you guys, this has been a lot of fun. A lot of firsts. You and I had never done a podcast together at.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's so weird.

[Damien Haas]

Kevin is on this side for the first time and therefore also.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Come on.

[Damien Haas]

I like it a lot.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, thank you for sharing, too.

[Damien Haas]

Thank you.

[Kevin Rigg]

Thank you for letting me share. Thank you for the platform and thank you for sharing, too.

[Damien Haas]

Yeah, it's a lot of little. Come on, you guys. If you enjoyed this, Please rate us 5 stars. Wherever you're listening to this podcast, it really does help us out. You can, of course, listen to us on Spotify and itunes on Wednesday when this comes out. Otherwise, the video version is available on Friday on our YouTube channel, YouTube.comsmoshcast come on. But you guys, until then, I hope you a fantastic week and we will catch you next time.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

Oh, come on. This has been beautiful. I'm so. This has been beautiful, but I'm also happy to go.

[Damien Haas]

We have lunch waiting for us. Yeah, I'm really hungry and I'm going to eat fried rice with scrimps.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

I think I got like a. Come on.

[Damien Haas]

Scrimp fried rice.

[Keith Leake Jr.]

That's going to be so annoying.