
Love is sweeter than reason... Lupita Nyong'o asks, "How far would you go for family?" Her cousins and her sister spill the tea on a legendary nursing mishap, and a Nigerian barrister pours her love into a signature dish for a delivery across the globe.
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Kevin Washington
Snap Studios.
Lupita Nyong'o
Snap Judgment is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart choice. Make another smart choice with Auto Quote Explorer to compare rates from multiple car insurance companies all at once. Try it@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based based on how you buy Snap Nation. And we got a treat for you today. I get to hand over the hosting reigns to my dear friend, star stage and screen Oscar winner, Lupita Nyong'o. I know, I know, I know. A real life a lister right here on snap. Can you believe it? Sensitive listeners are advised. Lipita Nyong'o. The show is yours.
Hey, Snap Nation. You might have heard from me before on snap, but in case you haven't, I've been working on something special with my friends here. It's called Mind you'd own a new storytelling show hosted and produced by me. It's about navigating what it means to belong. All from the African perspective. I'm Lupita Nyong'o and this is mind your own.
Kit
There's a custom flower right with your heart.
Mitch
I feel.
Kevin Washington
I know.
Lupita Nyong'o
So we're going to switch things up a little. I heard the wildest story a while back when I was with my sister Fiona. We were hanging out with my cousins.
Kit
I'm Kit. I'm the eldest. I have a mini parent relationship with these two where they think I'm their mother and I'm constantly reminding them that I'm not. I'm Taweet. That is not true. I'm the middle child. Okay. I'm Mitch. I'm the youngest and I'm their unpaid help. Yeah, Mitch, that's unnecessary. That is dirty laundry and you owe us anyway. We changed your diaper. We did? Yeah.
Lupita Nyong'o
Kit Taowie and Mitch are our first cousins. And the story was so good, I just knew I had to share it with you guys. So I brought Fiona into the studio to help me tell it.
Fiona
Hello.
Kit
Hi, Fiona.
Fiona
I'm excited about this one. This is one wild, wild story. You know how we use this term so loosely? I'll do anything for you. Hearing this story made me think about times when we're together. Like just this last weekend when we're sharing the bed and turning off the lights.
Lupita Nyong'o
Yes.
Fiona
And it's always like, who's going to turn off the lights? So it's. It just made me think. Yeah. If turning off the lights is hard, what's anything to you? Like when you say you do anything for me as Your sister. So I called them up, and here's a story as heard afresh from Kit, Tawi and Mitch.
Lupita Nyong'o
Okay, go ahead.
Kit
So our paternal first cousin lost her husband, and we were all going to have village, like the village home for a funeral. So it was a big exodus, everybody out of Nairobi, heading there. I left my children at home because when my husband was here, he wasn't traveling for the funeral. We didn't know where we were going. We had never been there. We didn't know the sleeping situation. So I said, okay, fine, you stay with the children, and I don't have to carry the little one. He was a little under one. He's not exclusively breastfeeding anymore. He eats solid food, stuff like that. So it wasn't a thing that we were doing all the time. Like, when he was a baby, I didn't carry a pump. I didn't think I needed it. We all piled into the car, and it's a lot. Wow, the donkey is so cute. Can we stop and kiss him? And these guys are always hating on my music choices. They're like, toby, we don't want to listen to your white music. I don't know if I can say that. Sometimes we play. Would you rather? And then we debate about it for the next 58 kilometers. And that's when I started to feel a headache. And I thought it was because I was driving the whole time. When she got the headache, she's like, oh, yeah, I have a headache. Can you drive? So I took over the driving. By that time, still quite a ways, maybe two, two and a half hours, not so far. But then the headache then now moved over to my shoulders. So Mitch was sitting in the back, and she was trying to massage my shoulders. I took two painkillers, like, really strong ones. Maramoja, you're supposed to only take one. I took two. I'm still dying. Then somebody's suggesting maybe you're dehydrated. So I'm drinking all the water in life. And so we keep stopping to go to the loo. It's just getting worse and worse. And now I have a migraine. Like, the back of my eyes are hurting. I can't keep my eyes open. I can't lift my arms. I can lift my hands, but then I can't lift my elbows past my shoulders. And we're going deeper and deeper into the country. Like, we've left all the level four hospitals. The last one is two hours away. My main goal was just to get to my mom fast enough because she'll know what to do. The rest of us were just kind of like, winging was late afternoon, 5ish, 5pm, literally, we've just arrived. We're standing at the car waiting because Mommy just drove in. So she gets out and then we greet her. I can't really hug her properly and she's asking me, what's wrong with you? And I say, my head hurts and I can't lift my arms and my shoulders are killing me. I don't know what's wrong. Help me. They were just standing there nodding and saying, tell her you also have a fever. Yeah, tell her you also almost threw up. Does Mummy's face ever change? No, she's a busybody. So she could be washing dishes. She was doing something else. Doing something, whatever. But she's hearing you. She said, oh, I think your breasts are full of milk. I hadn't thought of that because it had never happened. And this was my second child. Oh, you need to breastfeed. Oh, you need to breastfeed. So now I have no pump. It was an oversight. I'm running around looking for a place that I can be private and be able to express the milk and just release the tension. But there's no place. We have no access to the house, to the main house because it's full of people. We have tents that are not pitched. They're in the back of the car. I don't know, like, I need a bathroom. All the bathrooms are pit latrines and this is going to be messy because the milk is going to go everywhere. My dress is going to get wet. We sat for a bit and then we had to leave early. Kit is sick. We didn't even bury my cousin's husband. So we had to leave and go to our now our home in our village. Mummy told me, stand in the hot shower and as you're standing, press your breast. So I stood in the shower for a while and I started to express. Some of it was coming out. Not enough. It was really, really horrible. And now my breasts were getting more and more engorged. Now. I think I had expressed maybe three or four times. Every time I went to the bathroom I was like, let me try again. We tried hot towels as well. So we put the hot towels like a hot compress and just tried that. I just want to breastfeed. Anybody, Somebody, any, if that's going to make me feel better. I noticed a baby sleeping on a couch. Nobody was watching that baby I was going to pick up. I was just like, whose baby is this? Oh, Whose baby is that? And I had this idea. I just need somebody to suck it out. And that's when I just made a request. Guys, hear me out. Out, please, Please. Could you just breastfeed? Sorry, what? You want me to what me? I was still desperate to help. Yeah, but I didn't, I didn't think we were this desperate. But I just, I decided, okay, you know what kind of it means, what will be will be, but in like the wor possible way. So I went fast, okay. I went like, you know, I licked it just to know the taste, to kind of prepare my brain. Now let me, let me tell you something. Disclaimer. There is nothing that can prepare you on how breast milk tastes. Did you know breast milk is warm? There's a temperature 32 degrees Celsius. And then it's sweet, but not sweet like sugar. No, it's sweet like molasses. You know, I'm kind of passing my lips around it, trying to get as little of the taste as possible. You're sucking? Yeah, I was sucking like a straw, but it wasn't working. Her technique was incorrect. Tawi, don't suck it like with your lips. You need to suck with your tongue. She's saying you need to latch. So now I was coaching her on how to suck like a baby. By the time her nipples at the back of your throat, you are now committed to the experience. There's nothing you can do. Yeah. So she's like, let me show you. Open your mouth. And then she's sticking her boob, sticking her booby into your mouth. And then she's like, okay, now suck. And that's when it worked, but now it's working. So you have to swallow like half the contents by the time you're spitting. It's only half what you sucked out because you're lucky. Latching on now properly, Taui goes for like a minute or two and then she taps out. She's like, your turn. And I'm like, okay, fine, I latched. I did my, my minute or two. I was like, tap out, Tawi. So it went back and forth like that. Yeah. So immediately the, the milk comes out, it squats into the back of their throat. They remove their mouth because it's disgusting. That relief of oh, my God, yes, finally it's coming out. But then the frustration of it comes out, it stops, it comes out, it stops. And I'm just like, suck it up and just breastfeed properly. After a while, the milk just kind of flows on its own. And that's the point where now the physical relief is a lot more.
Lupita Nyong'o
More.
Kit
And now I'm feeling a lot better. And a gentle, flowing blue shape of relief. That's how it felt now. I showered. I'm good now. Now I can live my life happily until I see my baby tomorrow. We were now having a good time, chilling, talking. They were very upset, 100% upset. Not like angry or anything, but just one of those situations like that. That was an upsetting experience. Like you. You kind of don't know how to unpack that, but real talk. You know how people say, oh, I would do anything for my sister. I love my sister so much. I'd do anything for them. Yeah, that's anything. I will not forget it. Don't you ever.
Mitch
You better not.
Fiona
So hearing this story from Kinakit.
Lupita Nyong'o
Yeah.
Fiona
The second time you've heard the build up.
Lupita Nyong'o
Yes.
Fiona
Here I am in the same situation. Would you do that for me? Would you breastfeed?
Lupita Nyong'o
I feel like such a thing should only happen once in the lifespan of an entire family. So I'm really, really hopeful that this will never happen again. But should it happen, should it happen, Fiona, I would do it.
Fiona
Would you?
Lupita Nyong'o
I think so. I would do it with a lot of trepidation, but I would do it because ultimately I would not want to see you in such distress. But you know what the real takeaway from this story is?
Kit
Carry your kid.
Fiona
You know what Taoy and Mitch said, what?
Kit
We all invested in breast pumps.
Fiona
So that's my takeaway. I don't think I would wait to be in that situation. I should just go on Amazon.
Kit
Wow, wow, wow.
Fiona
And order a portable breast pump. What you have in my handbag.
Mitch
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lupita Nyong'o
Big thanks to Lupita, to Kit, to Tawi, and to Mitch and Fiona for sharing your family's story. The original score for that piece is by Clay Xavier. It was produced by David Exime with assistance from Fiona Nyong'o. When we return, a homemade recipe you will not want to miss. Stay tuned. I just went on a boys trip with some of my crew. Been a long time coming, but I need a travel upgrade. Not to my seat, to my luggage. I don't want to pay a bunch of cash, but it's gotta look good. It's gotta be awesome. Quince to the rescue. The perfect carry on bag. Carry on. Because I've learned my lesson about trying to check bags. I even got a cool Quint's Polo to put in my Quint's carry on bag. All for less than half the price of other outlets. How do they do it? By partnering with top factories, Quince cuts the cost of the middleman and passes the savings on. For your next trip, treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve from quints. Go to quince.com snap for 365 day returns plus free shipping on your order. That's Q U I n c e.com snap to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com snap welcome back to SNAP Judgment. The for your anything episode. Today we're hearing stories from a series we worked on with Lupita Nyong'o called Mind you'd Own. The show dives into stories that navigate belonging from an African perspective. And I'll let Lupita take it from here.
Okay, let's just take a moment and breathe. And now we set the table for our next story. It's from another mother. I hope you're listening. Mothers are some of the hardest working people on the planet. Take this mother, for example.
Mitch
My name is Joan Okosa Barrister Joan. I'm a lawyer. I'm a legal practitioner. I have four kids. The oldest is Ashley. I had Ashley when I was in school, when I was still in legal school. I was in like my third year. She's a sweet girl. I could do anything for her. She's sweet, she's kind and very brilliant.
Lupita Nyong'o
Now Joan's kids are all grown up and moved out. But that doesn't stop Joan from providing a home cooked meal every time she visits.
Mitch
Ashley said, mommy, all you want to do is cook, cook, cook, said, mommy, you don't want to go anywhere.
Lupita Nyong'o
In 2018, Joan hadn't seen her daughter in years. Ashley was at Columbia University getting her master's and Joan was in Nigeria. So when Ashley graduated that year, Joan knew she had to do what she did best.
Mitch
I said, you know what? I'm going to take oha soup to United States for her graduation. Oha is one of our native soup. I'm from the eastern part of Nigeria. We have six girls in my family. So you have to know how to cook the soup. So when I gave birth to all the kids, I did the same. I passed that on to the kids. So out of all the soups, oha became their favorite soup. I normally pass through London because I have family in London. I lived there for so many years. So what I did was I stayed over at my sister's place in Kent. I told my sister, oh, I'm going to make oha soup for Ashley. Oh, she was very Excited about it. What I took from home here in Nigeria was the ohalif, the indomie. I had the chin chin. I had even the bread they normally buy from Nigeria. So when I got to London, I went to the. To the local store where they sell African foods. I got everything else. First of all, you need the protein. And the protein is either beef, chicken or fish. Any kind of protein. I had kili shake, which was like a grilled beef. I didn't use just beef. I used the cow leg. You know, the meat comes with bone, but it's very, very nice with soup. It's very sweet. The cow. Like, if you know anyone in Nigeria, the children love the cow leg. Then the tripe. You have the tripe as well. That one takes a while. So I cook the tripe with the cowlick and then the fish. Doesn't take time to cook. Secondly, you have to get the tikka. It's called ede. That's what tikkin said. It just don't make oha with water. You have to get the stock. The stock is the real deal. That is what makes oha special. Then you have to get Bulgari. Doesn't smell nice, but that's what makes it authentic. And I cooked it and then I froze it. It was massive. It was a lot. Because I know Ashley would, you know, have her friends come over and, you know, have some. My trip was on a Saturday. I made the soup on Wednesday and I packed it. I brought it up frozen. It was still frozen. And then I packed all the luggage before I left for the airport. My sister had this angel apple. She said, why don't you take some fruits with you? And then I took the apple and then I put it on my, you know, my Prada bag. And then it was a British airways flight. And then seven and a half hours later, I landed in jfk. You know, we onboarded our pastry. Immigration, everything was okay. I had my papers, everything, the visa. I wasn't any issue. We're at the carousel. There was a policeman. He had, you know, he had the dog, the sniffer dog. And he kept on, whoa, you know, kept up barking. I said, well, that's not for me. I'm not carrying any legal thing. I'm not carrying drugs. I'm not doing anything that. I don't know why this dog is barking. He went away again. I came back again. He kept on barking. I. I've never been sneered by a dog. I never in my life, never been in trouble, any form of trou. Never broke the Laws. I tell my kids to stay out of trouble. Anything can happen, and it can be indicted, and the rest is history. And so when they kept coming, I was scared because just like being scared of snakes or being scared of ants or being scared of cockroach. Why. Why is this dog coming to me? Why is it coming around? And then they asked me to step aside. I did step aside. And they scout. We said, mom, can we see your back? And I said, oh, my bag. I said, okay. And then I gave them a bag. The man said, do you have any. Any kind of fruit? Do you have anything in your bag? I said, yes, I've got an apple. The guy said, oh, I'm sorry, you're not allowed to take. You bring in any. Any apple? And I said, wow. I didn't have any clue. I didn't know. I gave them the apple and then asked me to come with them. They took my luggage, and then they said, they have to now check my luggage. I said, fine, they should check it. They took me into the other side at jfk for people that may have maybe issues with their passport, they need to interrogate them. So that's the place they take you to. And that's when they open up the luggage. I was actually going to unlock the box for them. Said, no, ma'am, stay away. So the gentleman asked for the keys. I brought her the keys. That was when I was scared. It was over two hours just to take those things one after the other. I was like, oh, my God. He saw an indomin. And then he said, well, chicken indomin is illegal. That I should. Next time bring the onion, put it in the bin. I said, not a problem. He said, yes. And he said, I know you have kids. Because he knows that most Nigerians. Most Africans said yes for the children. And then he went on to the meat and said, this is dry meat. He said, no, because fish is allowed. I said, no problem. And then they chucked that one the bin. And then when they came to the soup, it was still frozen. And they said, what is this? I said. She said, yes, you know, fish. You know, local delicacy. Yeah, I know. The kids will enjoy it. They opened the soup because they couldn't see anything physically. It wasn't like they saw the meat clearly or they saw the fish. They knew the soup wasn't made just with water. He said, what's in this soup? What do you have? What did you cook it with? I wanted to tell the truth, not because of my legal bridegroom as a lawyer. I think I was raised to tell the truth. And I said, I cooked it with fish. I made it for my daughter. I was bringing it for her. And she said, okay, is it just fish? I said, no, sir, that I've got meat on it. Beef, cow leg. And he said, wow, meat is not allowed in the United States. I didn't know meat was not allowed. He said to me he could have allowed me to keep the fish with the soup if there was no meat, but since there was meat, like he was going to take it from me. And then he said, because you told the truth, there's nothing I can do. And then that he was so sorry. And right in front of me, right in front of me, they just took the soup and then they just drop it in the trash. I just wanted to go and see Ashley. I just wanted to run. I just wanted to go and meet her because she's been there for a long time. I couldn't contact her. I couldn't call her. And it was Mother's Day. I love my children so much. I just want to get to the destination and just give them all the goodies that I bring from Nigeria. And I told them, thank you. And then I packed the rest of my luggage. That was when that allowed me to go in and see Ashley. When I went outside and I realized that Ashley would be eating that soup, that's when I felt bad. Not right when I was with the officers, because I didn't want to show my many kind of emotions. And then Ashley said, mom, are you okay? And I told her what happened. She felt bad. And I felt bad that Ashley couldn't eat. The first person I called was my mother in law. We spoke our language and we said, the soup is gone. She said, ha. Oh my God, that soup. Ashley's favorite, right? I told my sisters, I've got. We are six girls. So I told them that the soup was gone. I told my best friend that the soup was gone. I learned from that experience. I want to tell the mothers out there, if you're traveling, you know, especially we that come from Africa, go through the list of what to bring and what not to bring. Now when I travel, I travel with only fish. And then I make a hassle for her every day in Toronto. I mean, feeding my children is something that is part of what is something that enjoy. It's something that I have to do, something that I'm born to do. I'll still be cooking for them till maybe I'm 100.
Lupita Nyong'o
After Joan told her story, we had to know did she regret telling the truth? Couldn't she just have told a little lie to save her precious soup? Joan's answer? No, absolutely not.
Thank you so much, Lupita. And big thanks to Joan Acosa and her daughter and story scout Ashley Acosa for sharing their story. The original score by Jeremy Uwa is produced by Priscilla Alaby and David Exime. The original Mind you'd own theme song by Sandra Lawson Indu AKA Sandu Indu AKA with Peach Curls featuring Ehi Orobo Managing Editor is Regina Berriaco Director of production is Marissa Dodge engineering by Miles Lassie and Big Love. And thanks to Limonada Media, you can listen to Mind you'd own on any podcast platform. 10 incredible episodes. There's a grave robber, Red carpet kissing under the 90 flame tree. All this and more. Mind your own with Pepita Nyong'o. Now after the break, an engineering breakthrough right here at SNAP Labs. Prepare yourself for the Snap Judgment time machine. Stay tuned.
Kit
Foreign.
Lupita Nyong'o
Welcome back to SNAP Judgment. My name is Kevin Washington, and we're bringing you a true story that takes us all over America. But you can put away your maps because this journey we're making today won't be on highways or country roads because we're launching through time. Now, this story does have some strong language and references incidents of racial violence. As such, listener discretion is advised. Our story begins in a Chicago neighborhood when Jacoby Cochran walks into his grandmother's house. Snap Judgment.
Kevin Washington
So my grandmother Mamie is a time traveler and her home, which I'm sitting in right now, is a time machine. You might think I'm being poetic or metaphorical, but nah, she is a wizard. About four years ago, I was standing on her front porch listening for the familiar who is it? I'm coming. Who is it? Her nice way of saying who the f is at my front door. When she opens the door, she embraces me in her arms and I'm immediately transported to a place generations far before my own. You see, my grandparents moved into this house in the winter of 1967. So when you walk in the air and the furniture all has generational weight to it, as you come in through the door, you're immediately greeted by these perfectly manicured couches and lamps that are about as old as the house itself. The ageless dining room, set in China, is about 45. As I enter into the kitchen, I walk past the 39 year old refrigerator and I sit down at this exact table across from my grandmother. I grab some newspapers and scissors and I get to clippin. Now as I'm sitting at the table, I can't help but think what the last two decades of my life have looked like sitting across from this world wizard. As I got older, I started watching Jeopardy. With my grandma and I could actually understand what was happening. And I sat across from this genius who won millions of imaginary dollars from this exact green chair. And she loved to chastise when they would miss low hanging fruit. But as the years went on, she gave me harsher and more grounded lessons. She taught me what it meant to be black in America. She taught me what it meant to watch Chicago transform to going from being the first black family on her neighborhood to one of all black families in her neighborhood. She taught me to stay alert. She was the first person that made me realize that to be black in America is to be marked, and to be marked is to be hunted. But on this July afternoon, we were sitting there and we were clipping out the comic strips. You see, my grandmother loves this comic strip called Love Is. She is pretty much every single one from, like 1983. Real talk. And as we're going through getting the coupons and the sales, getting the Love Is, she looks up at me and she says, I don't enjoy this process as much as I used to. Now, of course, I didn't take it personally. I knew granny wasn't sitting there saying she doesn't like being at this table with me. So I waited, and she said, kobe. They never really celebrate black folks on these newspapers. They go out of their way to make us look like a criminal, like an animal. See, my grandmother was always able to boil a dissertation down into a few sentences, and I understood exactly what she meant. I've been sitting at this table for 25 plus years, and the newspapers never taught me about black Wall street, how local gangs actually started as community organizations. Hell, even Juneteenth. Nah, they went out of their way to remind me that I was marched and to be marked is to be hunted. And at that moment, jeopardy. Gives way to the news. And me and my grandmother are immediately transported together from her kitchen table to a parking lot in Shreveport, Louisiana. It's grainy video footage, but both of us can kind of make out what's happening in the front of a convenience store. We see a black man being wrestled to the ground, knees in his back, chest pinned against the concrete. You can't really hear exactly what's being said, but me and my grandmother sitting in the silence try to translate when all of a sudden, gunshots feel my grandmother's kitchen she looks at me with these salt and pepper curls that have always been salt and pepper in my eyes. And she places her brittle hand on top of mine and she says, this is exactly what I'm talking about. Look how quickly they looked at that man and they made up their mind. Kobe, have I ever told you the story of Emmett Till? In that moment, I couldn't move, I couldn't say anything. And all of a sudden my grandmother turned around and she reached into this closet under a stack of newspapers and a stack of magazines and she pulled out this Ziploc bag. In it was a September 1955 copy of Jet magazine. She sat it on the table in front of me. She told me the story of August 1955 in Money, Mississippi. When she got done, it was clear that time traveling took a lot out of her. You see, she used to be able to sit at this table and move through stories with precise phenomenological detail. But it was clear in her later years that her powers were wavering and she looked so tired. So she put the magazines back in the Ziploc and back in the closet and she said, kobe, I'm gonna go upstairs and I'm gonna take a nap. I just sat here in this table in silence as the names ran through my head, like Oscar and Michelle, Mike and Sandra, Freddy, Rekiya, Laquan and Alton. Eventually, I got up from the table and I exited the time machine and I went home. I woke up the next day. I'm gonna be honest with you, I didn't feel great. As you can imagine, the growing trauma of being black in America kinda f up the morning ritual. It's almost like my first thought is, wow, I'm alive. And my second thought is, here we go again. But instead of dwelling, I think to myself, you know what? I'm going to get up, I'm going to go back to my grandma's house because I don't really like how it ended yesterday. We was in the middle of clipping newspapers and coupons and Love is comic strips. So I go back and I'm standing on the front porch listening for the familiar, who is it? I'm coming. Who is it? Which nicely translates to who the F is standing at my front door. My grandmother opens it and places me in her warm embrace and immediately I'm transported to a time generations before my own. I walk past the perfectly manicured couches and lamps, past the ageless dining room set, past the 39 year old refrigerator, and I sit back down at this table like I Have my entire life. And I ask my grandmother to pass me a newspaper and a pair of scissors, and I get to clippin. And in the silence, my grandmother looks up at me and she says, kobe, I don't really like doing this anymore. She said, they never really celebrate black folks on these newspapers. And I looked down and I said, you right, grandma, they don't. And before I could continue, she cut me off and she said, but, Kobe, I'm gonna show you one of my favorite newspapers. And she reached in this closet under a whole bunch of newspapers, and she pulled out a copy of the Sun Times from 2013. And she put it in my face, and she said, you see this little boy right up here in the corner? She said, this is my favorite newspaper because they put one of my favorite black boys on this newspaper. And it was a little picture of my face in the corner. And of course, I'm sitting there blushing with my grandma, because you know how grandparents hype you up, right? They make you feel like superstars even when you just living. But before I could say thank you, the television goes to the news, and me and my grandmother are immediately transported to St. Paul. Minneapolis, Minnesota. A black woman is holding up her phone on Facebook live as her daughter screams in the backseat, as her boyfriend bleeds out in the passenger seat, shot, as we would later learn, seven times. And me and my grandmother, we sit there and we watch the last moments of Philando Castile's life. And she looks at me with those salt and pepper curls, and she puts her brittle hand on top of mine, and she says, kobe, this is exactly what I'm talking about. Have I ever told you the story of Emmett Till? And she reaches behind her in this closet under a stack of newspapers and magazines, and she grabs a ziploc bag in it, an original September 1955 Jet magazine. And she sets it on the table, and she looks at me. You see, my grandmother is a time traveler, a wizard. And this house I sit in is her time machine. But she no longer remembers being the first black family on this block. You see, with the dementia. She no longer remembers the perfectly manicured couch and lamps. She doesn't remember that the ageless dining room set and China is 45. She doesn't remember that the refrigerator is 39. She doesn't even remember that we sat here at this exact table yesterday. But unlike yesterday, my grandmother summons up this energy, and she tells me vividly the story of August 28, 1955. She tells me first about four days earlier in a lie that Carolyn Bryant told she tells me about the night her husband and his brother kidnapped Teal from his grand uncle's house. How they beat him and tortured him, then tied a 75 pound fan around his neck and drug him and shot him in the back of his head and left him where he was found. Days later she told me about Mamie Teal and the sacrifices that no mother should ever have to make. How she was forced to make the tough decisions to show the world the brutality it was already very much aware of how black women are often left picking up the broken pieces in these moments and movements. A few months later my grandmother passed away just a season before celebrating the 50th anniversary in her home. And I'll be honest with you, I've been selfish. I've sat at this table now in the seat she once occupied and I wish every day that she'd sit next to me that she time travel with me. But part of me is happy that she no longer has to clip these newspapers where black people die every day for walking and running and driving and sleeping and selling and relaxing and living I recently came back to my grandmother's house and I stood on the front porch. I didn't listen for the familiar who is it? I'm coming. Who is it? Because now that it's my mother's home, she's installed the camera doorbell so she knows exactly who's on her front porch. My mother answers the door and she wraps me in her warm embrace. As I walk past the perfectly manicured couches that are still as old as the house, I notice the refrigerator has been replaced. But me and my mother, we sit in the same two chairs and we start clipping through newspapers. Not for coupons and sales, but like my grandmother, my mom loves this comic strip. Love is and then the TV goes to news and me and my mother are transported to Kenosha, Wisconsin. We don't clip the newspapers nearly as much as my grandmother did. We don't stack and collect the names, but we remember them. I open up my journal, I write down his name, Jacob Blake and then I write what's on my heart in that moment. My grandmother Mamie is a time traveler.
Lupita Nyong'o
Big, big thanks Jacoby Cochran for sharing his story with snap. Jacoby is an award winning performer, educator and writer who reps Chicago's south side all day. To learn more about where to catch his latest shows, videos and writing, check out our website stampjudgment.org Original score for that story was by Clay Xavier. It was produced by Regina Bediaco and Anna Sussman. Oh yes, Snappers. If you missed even a moment, know that an entire world of Snap storytelling awaits. Did I mention the real we're super proud of the mind you'd own podcast. The New York Times called it one of the 10 best podcasts of the year on podcast platforms everywhere. KQD in San Francisco is Snap Judgment's orbiting Hall of Justice. Snap is brought to you by the team that goes to bed each and every night promptly at 10:00. Except for the uber producer, Mr. Mark Ristich. That's about when he wakes up. Now there's Nancy Lopez, Pat Mercedi, Miller, Anna Sussman, Renzo Goriot, Jonathan Seal, Shayna Shealy Taylor Cot Flo Wiley, Bo Walsh, Marissa Dodge, David Exuma, and Regina Berriago. And this. This is nothing News. No way, sister news. And in fact, you can inquire around town as to what might be the word One of the young toughs might let us slip that the bird is the word. Make sure you've heard correctly. The bird is the word. Yes, sir, the bird is the word. The bird, bird, bird. The bird is the word. Finally satisfied that yes, the bird is in fact the word. The bird, bird, bird being the word in question, you would still not be as far away from the news as this is. But this is PRX.
Snap Judgment: "For You, Anything" – Detailed Summary
Release Date: April 3, 2025
Host/Author: Snap Judgment and PRX, featuring Lupita Nyong’o
In the April 3, 2025 episode of Snap Judgment titled "For You, Anything," host Lupita Nyong’o takes the reins to guide listeners through a series of heartfelt and compelling stories. This episode delves deep into themes of family, sacrifice, cultural identity, and the African perspective on belonging. With its signature blend of poignant storytelling and dynamic beats, the episode offers listeners a cinematic and emotional journey.
Lupita Nyong’o introduces a new segment she has been developing alongside her colleagues called "Mind Your Own," focusing on what it means to belong from an African viewpoint. This segment sets the stage for the intimate and personal narratives that follow.
Notable Quote:
Lupita Nyong’o [00:07]: "Snap Judgment is brought to you by Progressive Insurance... Sensitive listeners are advised. Lupita Nyong’o. The show is yours."
Lupita shares a deeply personal story involving her cousins Kit, Taowi, and Mitch. The tale unfolds during a challenging time when Kit’s husband passes away, requiring the family to come together for funeral arrangements.
Notable Quote:
Kit [02:33]: "Our paternal first cousin lost her husband, and we were all going to have village, like the village home for a funeral... It's a lot."
The family embarks on a strenuous journey from Nairobi to their village home. Kit, burdened with both her children and the emotional weight of the trip, faces physical exhaustion and unexpected health issues, including a severe migraine caused by engorged breasts from breastfeeding.
Notable Quote:
Kit [11:53]: "And now my breasts were getting more and more engorged."
In her desperation, Kit makes a bold and unconventional request for assistance with breastfeeding, leading to a poignant display of familial support and ingenuity. The story highlights the lengths to which family members will go to support one another in times of crisis.
Notable Quote:
Kit [12:05]: "This is an upsetting experience. Like you. You kind of don't know how to unpack that."
The narrative concludes with valuable takeaways about preparedness and the importance of community support, emphasizing the necessity of practical solutions like investing in breast pumps to prevent such crises.
Notable Quote:
Kit [13:47]: "Carry your kid."
The episode shifts focus to Joan Okosa, a lawyer and dedicated mother, who embarks on a mission to celebrate her daughter Ashley’s graduation by bringing traditional Nigerian Oha soup to the United States.
Notable Quote:
Joan Okosa [17:44]: "In 2018, Joan hadn't seen her daughter in years. Ashley was at Columbia University getting her master's and Joan was in Nigeria."
Joan meticulously prepares the Oha soup, ensuring it embodies authentic flavors by sourcing traditional ingredients both from Nigeria and local African stores in London. Her dedication underscores the importance of maintaining cultural traditions even when far from home.
Notable Quote:
Joan Okosa [17:58]: "Oha is one of our native soups. I'm from the eastern part of Nigeria."
During her journey, Joan encounters unexpected obstacles at JFK Airport. Upon arrival, she faces scrutiny from customs officers who confiscate her meticulously prepared soup due to restrictions on certain food items, leaving her devastated as she watches her daughter's favorite meal discarded.
Notable Quote:
Joan Okosa [25:30]: "He said, well, chicken Indomin is illegal. That I should... Next time bring the onion, put it in the bin."
Despite the setback, Joan’s story is one of resilience and unwavering love for her children. She reflects on the emotional toll of the experience and the lessons learned about cultural preservation and navigating immigration challenges.
Notable Quote:
Joan Okosa [26:10]: "Feeding my children is something that is part of something that I enjoy. It's something that I have to do, something that I'm born to do."
The finale of the episode features Jacoby Cochran, an award-winning performer, educator, and writer from Chicago’s South Side. Jacoby presents a visionary story that intertwines personal legacy with historical racial struggles.
Notable Quote:
Lupita Nyong’o [28:56]: "Big, big thanks Jacoby Cochran for sharing his story with snap."
Jacoby introduces the concept of his grandmother Mamie as a literal time traveler. Her home serves as a metaphorical time machine, allowing them to witness pivotal moments in African American history firsthand. This narrative device poignantly illustrates the enduring impact of historical events on present-day identities.
Notable Quote:
Jacoby Cochran [30:00]: "So my grandmother Mamie is a time traveler and her home, which I'm sitting in right now, is a time machine."
Through vivid storytelling, Jacoby and his grandmother relive traumatic events such as the murder of Emmett Till and the killing of Philando Castile. These experiences highlight the persistent nature of racial violence and the media’s role in shaping perceptions of Black individuals in America.
Notable Quote:
Jacoby Cochran [46:56]: "I felt bad that Ashley couldn't eat. The first person I called was my mother-in-law."
Jacoby’s grandmother laments the lack of positive representation of Black people in newspapers, emphasizing how media often focuses on criminality rather than celebrating achievements and history. This reflection underscores the ongoing struggle for equitable representation in media.
Notable Quote:
Jacoby Cochran [30:00]: "They never really celebrate black folks on these newspapers. They go out of their way to make us look like a criminal, like an animal."
The story culminates in Jacoby reflecting on his grandmother’s passing and the lasting legacy of her stories. He expresses a yearning for continued intergenerational dialogue and remembrance, ensuring that the lessons of the past inform the future.
Notable Quote:
Jacoby Cochran [46:56]: "I wish every day that she'd sit next to me and time travel with me."
The episode wraps up by reinforcing the central themes of sacrifice, cultural identity, and the enduring strength of familial bonds. Through the diverse narratives of Kit, Joan, and Jacoby, Snap Judgment offers a multifaceted exploration of what it means to belong and support one another within the African diaspora.
Notable Quote:
Lupita Nyong’o [14:15]: "I think, I would do it with a lot of trepidation, but I would do it because ultimately I would not want to see you in such distress."
The episode features original scores by Clay Xavier and Jeremy Uwa, and is produced by a dedicated team including David Exime, Priscilla Alaby, Regina Berriaco, and others. Special thanks are extended to the storytellers and contributors whose narratives bring depth and authenticity to the episode.
Notable Mention:
Lupita Nyong’o [27:12]: "Thank you so much, Lupita. And big thanks to Joan Acosa and her daughter Ashley Acosa for sharing their story."
As with typical episodes, there are promotional segments for sponsors such as Progressive Insurance and Quince, emphasizing practical solutions aligned with the episode's themes of preparedness and thoughtful living.
Notable Quote:
Lupita Nyong’o [16:44]: "Big thanks to Lupita, to Kit, to Tawi, and to Mitch and Fiona for sharing your family's story."
"For You, Anything" is a testament to Snap Judgment’s commitment to elevating diverse voices and experiences, offering listeners a rich tapestry of stories that resonate on both personal and communal levels. Whether navigating the complexities of family dynamics, cultural preservation, or confronting historical injustices, this episode underscores the profound impact of storytelling in fostering understanding and empathy.