So Money with Farnoosh Torabi
Episode 1951: Building Wealth, Legacy and Financial Confidence with Bola Sokunbi
Date: March 2, 2026
Guest: Bola Sokunbi, founder of Clever Girl Finance
Episode Overview
This episode centers on wealth-building, legacy, and cultivating financial confidence, especially among women and those from immigrant backgrounds. Host Farnoosh Torabi welcomes Bola Sokunbi, a six-time bestselling author and founder of Clever Girl Finance, to discuss her new book Clever Girl Millionaire and her personal journey from modest beginnings to financial independence. Their conversation addresses the cultural narratives around money, overcoming scarcity, building wealth intentionally (not quickly), legacy beyond financial assets, and managing familial financial obligations.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. The Meaning and Mindset of "Millionaire"
- The term "millionaire" often feels out of reach or even uncomfortable, especially for women and those not raised to envision wealth for themselves.
- Bola: "There's a lot of hesitancy, fear, and feeling like it’s so far out of reach… It’s like, how can I think about that big goal when I'm here trying to pay off debt or living paycheck to paycheck?" (12:36)
- She stresses shifting from "Is this possible for me?" to "What can I do to make this possible?"
Tactics for Getting Started:
- Take stock of all income, expenses, and debts.
- Identify opportunities to cut back or increase income (you can only cut back so much).
- Emphasize objectivity: "This is what I can control; this is what I cannot control." (13:50)
- Build habits—consistency in saving matters more than how much you can save in the beginning.
2. Overcoming Uncertainty and Scarcity Mentality
- Both Bola and Farnoosh discuss their families' immigration stories as models for facing uncertainty and discomfort.
- Bola: "We have a choice… What can we do within our control? My mom would tell me her options were to sit here and complain or figure out what she can do to move the needle forward little by little." (19:34)
- Uncertainty often pushes us out of our comfort zones and can be the catalyst for disruption and eventual growth.
- Farnoosh: "We use this word a lot in the business world—disruption… But if you apply that to your personal life, it’s all there. The choice becomes: are you just going to let this ride, or are you going to disrupt and drive this change?" (22:54)
3. Money, Sacrifice, and Building a Foundation
- Bola shares a personal story of saving $100k in three and a half years on a modest salary, illustrating the power of consistent, intentional action—even if it’s as small as depositing a single dollar.
- Bola: "I drove to the credit union and I put the dollar on the counter and said, 'I want to deposit it.' The teller was like, 'Girl, did you drive all the way here?'…It’s about the consistency." (42:00)
- The main message: legacy and financial confidence are built not in leaps, but through steady incremental actions.
4. The Power and Importance of Legacy
- Legacy is more than money—it's about values, education, and how you impact others.
- Bola: "Legacy, for me, is not just about money… My dad didn’t leave us any trust funds. He left enough to take care of my mom and final words saying, 'I don’t owe anybody anything.' But the legacy was prioritizing education, cutting your coat according to your size, and giving back." (30:16, 31:29)
- Farnoosh: "When we talk about planning your financial life, it’s very important to have a North Star and to think about your why… and money can be a tool for that." (27:18)
- Bola and her family started a scholarship in her father’s hometown, sending 12 children to school—showing you don’t need to be wealthy to make an impact.
- Bola: "Legacy and impact is not just about money. It’s not about you waiting to be rich to do it." (34:13)
5. Navigating Family Financial Obligations
- In many immigrant and minority communities, supporting relatives is a cultural expectation.
- Bola: "It is assumed. Me and my siblings have inherited some of my dad's obligations… when you have siblings or your siblings have kids, you feel that tug in your heart." (34:58)
- Practical guidance for helping parents/relatives while managing your own needs:
- Empower parents via reviewing their finances, cutting unnecessary costs, helping them access benefits.
- Set and communicate clear limits on support to avoid resentment.
- Bola: "Don’t take it on as a burden and let it slowly kill you. Communicate and come to a common ground." (38:22)
6. Women, Single Mothers, and Wealth Building
- Farnoosh raises the unique pressure facing single mothers as primary earners.
- Bola: "Single and slaying… There's this negative connotation about single mothers trying to build wealth, and I try to reframe that—look at it as a superpower… but build your own buffers, hedge around you, and start putting money away for your future no matter how small." (39:39)
- Small consistent actions create big change over time.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- Bola (on small habits): "At the beginning stage it’s less about the amount and more about the consistency… when you get that bonus or tax return, you automatically save some of it because it’s now built into who you are." (02:18, repeated at 42:09)
- On familial sacrifice: "My mom was an investment banker in Nigeria… moved here and started working as a nanny. That experience shaped how I think about money, opportunity, and legacy." (04:58, 19:34)
- On legacy: "When you create something that matters and have the financial means tied to it, then you can start making big differences beyond just yourself and your family." (31:29)
- Bola (on financial education): "I want to be able to position my children where they can take care of themselves and figure life out no matter what." (33:03)
- Farnoosh (on hardship): "I'm not going to compare my pain to my parents' pain… But it’s all relative." (25:16)
- Bola (to Farnoosh at show's end): "You just gave me a lifeline when nobody else did, especially in the early days. I am forever grateful to you for your support." (43:07)
Timestamps for Major Segments
- 02:09 – Bola’s story of saving and why small amounts matter.
- 09:32 – Introduction to Clever Girl Millionaire and shifting focus to legacy.
- 12:36 – Women’s complicated relationship with the word "millionaire."
- 13:50 – Steps for those just getting by; building from zero.
- 19:34 – Overcoming uncertainty; Bola’s mother’s experience as an immigrant.
- 22:54 – Farnoosh and Bola on embracing discomfort and personal "disruption."
- 29:06–34:33 – Deep dive on legacy: education, family obligations, and giving back.
- 34:58–39:39 – Cultural expectations around supporting relatives; advice for listeners.
- 39:39 – Advice for single mothers and solo breadwinners.
- 42:00 – Anecdote: driving to deposit a single dollar to underscore saving consistency.
- 43:07 – Mutual appreciation between Bola and Farnoosh.
Final Thoughts
This episode will resonate with anyone striving to build wealth intentionally or to redefine what wealth and legacy mean in their own lives. Bola’s stories emphasize the impact of small, consistent financial habits, the importance of clear values and legacy, and the real emotional realities of supporting family while pursuing financial independence. The conversation is encouraging, practical, and layered with rich personal anecdotes—showing that wealth-building is as much about mindset and intention as it is about numbers.
Listen to this episode if you:
- Are looking for practical, emotionally attuned financial advice
- Feel daunted by big wealth-building goals
- Face expectations of family support
- Are seeking motivation to define your own financial legacy
Guest Resources:
- Clever Girl Finance
- Clever Girl Millionaire (Bola’s latest book)
Host: