She Said God Told Her to Leave Me... Then Married Someone Else - The Exit Interview - Corey Arvinger

Summary

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Social Proof Podcast: The Exit Interview – Corey Arvinger

Episode Title: She Said God Told Her to Leave Me... Then Married Someone Else
Release Date: July 15, 2026
Hosts: Donni Wiggins (of the Social Proof Network)
Guest: Corey Arvinger

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Episode Overview

This episode is part of the podcast’s new “Exit Interview” series, where entrepreneurs open up about the lessons learned from significant life transitions—in this case, breakups. Guest Corey Arvinger shares his candid story of how his previous romantic relationship ended abruptly when his partner claimed "God told her to leave." Corey recounts the emotional aftermath, her rapid marriage to someone else, and the subsequent introspection it triggered. Hosts and guest dive deep into relationship dynamics, self-awareness, dating preferences, faith, and healing.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Breakup Story: How and Why It Ended

• Initial Relationship Formation:

  • Met on Instagram after Corey responded to her Valentine’s Day post. Quick connection, daily conversation, and within a couple of weeks, she visited Atlanta (02:47–04:40).
  • Relationship was long distance—she lived in Tampa, he was in Atlanta.

• Faith & Abstinence:

  • Early discussions about celibacy—both were committed but “slipped up” once while visiting Chicago (05:47–07:27).
  • Corey acknowledges both were at fault for not keeping their abstinence pledge.

• Breakup Catalysts:

  • Corey’s partner said, “God told her to leave” (02:25–02:31).
  • Struggles around intimacy and faith—Corey: “I think that I may have just put her in a position where she felt like I'm going back to what I left” (08:31).
  • Lack of communication was a recurring issue.

• Aftermath:

  • After the breakup in November, Corey discovered that by January, his ex was in a new relationship—and was married by the following year to someone in Atlanta (12:12–13:32).
  • Emotional impact: "It hurt because...I'm like, dang, is it me?" (14:43).

2. Lessons in Love, Self-Awareness, and Healing

• Introspection:

  • Corey openly wrestles with repeated breakups: “At some point you have to say, is it you?” (14:17).
  • Recognizes potential patterns, possible overloving ("I think you love hard" – Donni, 16:11), and moving too fast.
  • Corey reflects: “When I reflect on that, I really think that part of it is like listening to my partner more and hearing what they say when they're not happy” (17:59).

• Accountability & Areas to Improve:

  • Corey admits needing to listen better and be more considerate (36:19, 36:23).
  • Donni pushes for deeper self-examination: “What is wrong with you?...I haven't heard you say something that is your fault without someone else being involved.” (35:43)
  • Corey recognizes he must work on emotional availability and vulnerability: “More emotionally available...let myself be more vulnerable and open” (36:44–37:33).

• Memorable Quotes:

  • Corey: “I’m not tainted by anything I’ve been through—it just helped me build understanding and ask more questions early.” (36:49)
  • Donni: “You need to make the same list of things you need to fix [as you do your dating preferences].” (37:45)

3. Corey’s Dating Preferences & Non-Negotiables

• Ideal Partner List (read and discussed, 23:38–27:47):

  • Loves Jesus and attends church regularly
  • “90s fine” (natural beauty, minimal cosmetic enhancements)
  • No kids—unless in a uniquely supportive situation
  • Athletic, active lifestyle
  • Honorable, passion-driven career (not interested in dating “bottle girls” or those deep in nightlife)
  • Fashion sense, family values, nurturing, optimistic

• Body Type:

  • Prefers natural, athletic build; “slim with a little body”; “weight in the right areas” (59:34–60:46).

4. Dating Life Now & Boundaries

• Current Approach:

  • Taking a pause—few are interesting enough to pursue (19:02–19:10).
  • First date is always a “coffee date”—light, low pressure, low cost (19:25–20:25).

• Work/Church Life Complications:

  • Corey’s role at his church is visible—he’s cautious about dating within the congregation due to perceptions and the risk of losing community for others (21:03–22:24).

• Self-Discipline:

  • “I think self-discipline is really important. I’m very aware of how I appear and then what people see as well.” (21:17)

5. Compatibility, Deal-Breakers, and Openness

• Lifestyle Compatibility:

  • Ok with someone who drinks socially, not smoking (40:24–40:52).
  • Insists on shared faith and desire for celibacy—though open to grace and honesty regarding struggles (41:12–42:40).

• Deal-breakers:

  • Not interested in dating someone who “used to be gay”—citing personal comfort and honesty about attractions (46:25–47:14).
  • Financial literacy is important—must know how to stretch a dollar and be responsible, though not fixated on income (48:15–48:58).

• Weddings:

  • Prefers simple courthouse weddings, but willing to compromise if the partner’s desire for a big wedding is deeply rooted—financial prudence is encouraged (50:48–54:30).

• Cheating:

  • Corey has “never physically cheated,” but acknowledges emotional indiscretions/conversations in the past (50:11–50:39).

6. Approaching Corey: Advice for Interested Women

• How to Approach:
  • Clear, direct communication preferred (“Just make it known and clear, guys, we're not as smart as you think we are in that aspect." – 56:12, 56:35).
  • Be authentic—don’t try too hard or mask intentions (57:15–57:44).
  • Slide into the DMs with “I saw the episode” as a flirtatious opener (57:48–58:23).
  • In-person, break the ice by commenting on something specific—avoid pickup lines (58:23–59:12).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On sudden breakups:
  “She told me that God told her to. Which was an interesting response.” – Corey (02:25–02:33)

• On being blindsided:
  “In January the next year, she got in a relationship. … February, I see a post on Instagram that she got married.” – Corey (12:12–12:32)

• Self-Reflection:
  “Am I self-aware enough to know where I lack so that I could, like, fix these things?” – Corey (14:22)

• On what he needs to work on:
  “Being a good listener…sometimes I’m such a common sense person…I just have a little tolerance for [nonsense].” – Corey (28:39–29:44)

• On emotional growth:
  “I have to just let myself ... be more vulnerable and open because that creates a safe space for somebody else to do so as well.” – Corey (36:56)

• On faith and intimacy:
  “If you truly follow Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, then ... that’s the covenant the Bible says.” – Corey (41:12–41:39)

• On finances in relationships:
  “I need you to be able to, like, keep me even keel and level in those situations. … Just know how to make a dollar last.” – Corey (48:28–48:58)

• Direct dating advice:
  “Just tell me…be yourself. Don’t try to spit game or none of that.” – Corey (56:35–57:15)

• Closing encouragement from Donni:
  “I think you’re gonna be a really, really good catch as soon as you take accountability and find out what’s wrong with you.” (55:20)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Corey’s breakup and aftermath: 02:13–10:07
• The faith/abstinence conversation: 05:47–07:27
• Discovering ex’s new relationship and marriage: 12:05–13:32
• Corey’s feelings and reflections: 14:43–17:59
• Discussion about accountability: 28:39–36:56
• Reading Corey’s ideal partner list: 23:38–27:47
• Current dating approach (coffee dates): 19:01–20:25
• Dealing with dating at work/church: 21:03–22:24
• Compatibility questions (drinking, intimacy, orientation): 40:24–47:14
• Finances in dating: 48:15–49:47
• Wedding preferences and compromise: 50:48–54:30
• How to approach Corey (DM advice): 56:12–58:23
• Final thoughts and encouragement: 55:20–55:42

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Tone & Style

The conversation is humorous and direct, blending vulnerability with practical relationship and self-growth advice. Donni’s frank questioning pushes Corey to dig deeper, while Corey is honest about his shortcomings and growth process.

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Summary Takeaways

• Healing from Breakups: Corey’s story demonstrates the confusion, hurt, and self-doubt that can come from abrupt relationship endings, especially when faith and intimacy are involved.
• Value of Self-Awareness: Growth comes not just from analyzing what went wrong with others, but from introspectively considering one’s own patterns and flaws.
• Faith & Dating Standards: For Corey, shared faith and commitment shape his dating life and non-negotiables.
• Accountability & Vulnerability: The episode offers a model for how men can be urged toward deeper emotional honesty and responsibility—key for healthy relationships.
• Authentic Connections: Simple, direct, and honest communication trumps game-playing, both for approaching new people and for sustaining relationships.

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Connect with Corey:
Instagram & TikTok: [@CoreyArvinger]
(Slide into his DMs “I saw the episode” for a subtle, approved opener!)

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This episode is a must-listen for anyone exploring the interplay of faith, self-awareness, and modern dating as an entrepreneur or faith-driven individual.

Transcript

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[Corey]

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[Corey]

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[Corey]

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[Donnie Wiggins]

Welcome to the exit interview. My partner Donnie Wiggins and I have decided to interview successful entrepreneurs. And today we have Corey and I'm going to ask you our very first question.

[Corey]

Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Why did you exit your last relationship?

[Corey]

I would say it wasn't my choice to exit it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

She left you?

[Corey]

But. But it was exited? Yes, I would say that, yes.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Dang.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Why she leave you?

[Corey]

You Know what's crazy? It was really interesting. She told me that God told her to.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Which was.

[Corey]

Which was an interesting response.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Oh, what an out. What about. Okay, yeah, a slightly more aggressive question, but yeah. What is it about you that she didn't want to be with anymore, do you think?

[Corey]

It's hard to know because we didn't really communicate well. I feel like she didn't communicate properly. And what I mean by that is we had a conversation. She was out here. So it was long distance. I have to give you, like a little background. It was long distance. We met on Instagram. We actually. I actually saw a post that she posted on Valentine's Day of that year. Two weeks later, she was out here in Atlanta. I wanted her to come out here. We were talking every day. It was cool and it was like a cool vibe. I got her a hotel, like somewhere in the city. And I knew she was like a faith based person. She was.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Hold on, I'm sorry, y' all met on Instagram? Yeah, we met on Instagram. She was already going to be coming out here or.

[Corey]

No, no, she was.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

So.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Through conversation?

[Corey]

Yeah, through conversation. So basically I saw her. I saw her post on Instagram for Valentine's Day. She was just talking about being single and enjoying loving herself. And then I kind of on her page, she was on my sport page and I was on her page and I saw that she had this demonic experience with weed. And like, all these things started happening. So I was like, oh, my gosh. She like has a cool story. So I was like, oh, this story is dope. Like, I just like DM'd her, like, say, oh, shout out to you, whatever. And then like started conversation. We probably DM for like one or two days. Then we exchanged numbers, then we FaceTime. And it was just like an instant vibe. Like super cool, down to earth, very open. So I'm like, man, I want to see if you are actually somebody that I could see myself with. You should come out to Atlanta. And at first she was like, no. Like, I'm not. I'm not getting flat out flew that or whatever. And I'm like, this is not that. Like, you can have your own hotel. I will give you the booking and numbers for your flights. If you want to change anything, like, all the information yours. This is not that. So that's what I say. Like, it was two weeks. Like literally two weeks. And that weekend in Atlanta, we had a lot going on. We had Chandler Moore was coming to our church for a performance. That was cool. It was A Hawks game that weekend I already was going to go to. So, like, it was like everything was lining up. And so that's how we met. And super cool. And neither one of us was necessarily, like, looking, but we were both in a position where we were open.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Got it.

[Corey]

Throughout that time, you know, we talked about celibacy and all that, and. And we were practicing abstinence. All that stuff. All that good stuff. We flew to a different. A few places. We went to Chicago, we went to D.C. obviously, she came to Atlanta because she lived in Tampa. So, like, we. We were. She was traveling. If she was gonna come to me, we might as well just go somewhere else. Yeah, Atlanta. I don't like even being in Atlanta to date sometimes, so I like to just be out.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Why?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Why don't you like Atlanta? People nosy.

[Corey]

Like, you know, I'm sure you could. You've experienced this. You just be out doing something that you don't think you're gonna see anybody, you know, and then it's like, oh, hey, what's up? And it's nothing harmful.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Nah.

[Corey]

But it just be like, I don't

[Donnie Wiggins]

have that testimony, bro.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Really?

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't be out doing nothing that I wouldn't want nobody.

[Corey]

No, no. I'm not saying you're doing something you're not supposed to be doing. I'm saying you just living your life like you could be getting coffee and people see you and want to talk to you because they know you. I don't mind that when I'm by myself, but when I'm with somebody I'm talking to, I'll be trying to protect that space. And so I want to back up

[Donnie Wiggins]

the story a little bit. How long was y' all together?

[Corey]

Technically, about eight months.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Abstinent. The whole eight months?

[Corey]

No. And that's. That's. I think. I really think that was the main issue when we were in Chicago. We slipped up, essentially. I won't blame anybody for it, but I definitely tried to stop it. But also, she was the aggressor. I also am a man, so I'm like. I'm trying, but I'm also like.

[Donnie Wiggins]

The flesh is.

[Corey]

So many times. It's so many times you can say no, especially when you truly care for somebody. But I think. I think we're both at fault.

[Donnie Wiggins]

At the end of the day.

[Corey]

We put ourselves in a position, but

[Donnie Wiggins]

you don't typically find that story where it's like, she's like, bro, come on with it.

[Corey]

Yeah. And it wasn't even like that. So we had we went to an Atlanta Dream game. I mean, a Chicago sky game. We went to go see Angel Reese play in Chicago. And we had came home to take a break before we went to go out to eat. And so we were just taking a nap. Like, it was just like.

[Donnie Wiggins]

She was thinking about that thing all day.

[Corey]

Take a nap. And then. I don't. I can't. I can't honestly even tell you how we got there. I. I really don't know. It just happened.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But I just remember it doesn't just happen.

[Corey]

I mean, it didn't, like, just happen, but, like, you know, we were hugging, you know, cuddling or whatever, but, like, we. We kissed and stuff before, so that wasn't like a new thing, but I think just in the position we were in and, like, just. We were having a great time. Nice trip. We've been respectful, so it's been all connection because, you know, when you're long distance, you're having a lot of deep conversations. We're not seeing each other every week. We're seeing each other every month. Yeah, every other month sometimes. So we're very close and connected, so. And I think we. The tension was there. So to me, I felt like if it happened, it was like, all right, we got that out the way. But for her, it was, like, almost detrimental. Like, it changed everything.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Really?

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So it happened one time?

[Corey]

Only one time? Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And then how long after that did y' all break up?

[Corey]

I would say it was about three months, if my time's correct. About three months. I remember it was November of that year. And we went to. We went to Chicago in probably September, around August. September. Because I remember my mom said she wanted to go for her birthday, and I took her, like, two weeks later. So it was around that time,

[Donnie Wiggins]

man. Okay, so let me ask this question. I gotta ask the question.

[Corey]

Ask the question.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So, like, on a scale of like, 1 to 10, how is your performance? Here's why I'm asking. Because she's like, I want it. I want it. That had nothing to do with it. I promise you for that long. You never know.

[Corey]

You're like, I promise you.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That wasn't it. We slip up. It's like, oh, oh, my bad, my bad.

[Corey]

For us. I think let's just say I was the worst ever, right? I don't even think that would have changed anything. I think it was like the. The mental. So her previous relationship, she told me that they didn't work out because when she started that journey of finding Christ, he wasn't willing to not have sex. So I think that I may have just put her in a position where she felt like I'm going back to what I left is where my brain went.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Scale of one to ten, not just, I mean, nine. So you showed out nine.

[Tammy]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yes, Yes,

[Corey]

I would say, nah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, that's a wild question. That's a wild. I'm here to answer all questions and I just want to get to the root of it, bro, because that wasn't it.

[Corey]

I know that for sure.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So that happened and that was the only time.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And then it just got weird from there. You're saying.

[Corey]

Yeah, I mean like we finished the trip, it was cool, but it was a little awkwardness. And when we got back, we talked about. It was crazy because we actually went on another trip with her family after that. We went to, to the cabins, her mom and her dad. It was her birthday and her. It was like their anniversary. And I was like, well, I got this cabin I can get. It's like multiple rooms, like whatever, whatever. So we actually went on a trip after that. It was great. So it was still a little. But like I felt like we were working through it. Like we all said we all make mistakes. So I think this was like her, like it was real heavy on her.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And so you can't, you can't pinpoint exactly what the big riff was. She was just, I, I can't do this anymore. Yeah.

[Corey]

And I think too like she felt like I couldn't lead her in that, in that department.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I would say, oh, that's kind of selfish, bro. You know, you throw it, she throw it at you. And then the fact that you didn't deny it, now you're not the leader.

[Corey]

I think she wanted me as a man to just be able to, you

[Donnie Wiggins]

know, lead extreme impossible.

[Corey]

And it was hard.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Yes, it was.

[Grainger Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That's low key impossible, bro. That is, that's extremely difficult. And you might have, you might have dodged a bullet on that one.

[Corey]

Maybe. You know what's funny? This story is actually really interesting. So in November and if she watches this, she just be so mad. But you know, it is what it is. In November, we broke up. Megan Ashley and Jackie Hill Perry were doing X242, their big conference, 12,000 people, whatever. She was coming out there here for that and I was out here. She told me, we, we went through the whole conversation. She came with some girls from a community. So I was just there dolo like, I'm in Atlanta, I know people is cool. And we sat beside each other the Last day. So the last day we. After the conference is over, it was kind of a weird energy with us, and I was like, what's going on? Like, I haven't really seen you. I know you're with your girl, so I wasn't pressuring you, but you are in Atlanta, like. And so the last day we went to, she was like, meet me at KROG Street Market. I want to talk to you. Because she was staying with her girls. And so we went. We met up there. And basically, she was like, telling her that God told her this weekend that we shouldn't be together. And she was saying that even though I was there, like, I was sitting, like, maybe like, a seat or two down from her, she was like. She just felt so distracted. So distracted. And I'm just like. I mean, I was getting what I needed out of it. I'm, you know, I'm locked in. But something about that just was like, it was a block for her. And I think that's, like. I think she took that as a sign, and that's when she was like, God told her that, you know, she needed to be alone. I know all this information now, but at the time, I didn't know this information in January of the next year. So this is November. In January the next year, she got in a relationship.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I knew it, bro. Yo, I'm telling you as you're telling the story. I'm like, yo, she wants somebody else. And he was in that picture.

[Corey]

She got in a relationship. And I didn't know this, mind you. Like, I said, I didn't know this. And we had kind of stopped talking cold turkey. And so I would reach out every once in a while just like, hey, how are you? And she would respond like, cool. She wasn't super, like, you know, she wasn't too. She wasn't communicating too much, but she wasn't like, not. She wasn't ignoring me either. And so, long story short, February of this year, I see a post on Instagram that she got married. I was like, so mind you, this is. This is 2024, November, we break up. 2024, 2025, January, she's in a relationship, and then 2026, she's married, and she's married a year later. So basically two years after we met, but we were together for eight months, and then she was with somebody for a year and got. Essentially got married. And so it was just really interesting because he was located in Atlanta, and he's not any. He's not in any of the circles. I'M in. But like, we have this program in my church called Maid Men and he did that program as well. I don't think, I don't think he did it like, with me, but. And he probably doesn't know who I am, but, like, it was just like, how did you meet him? Right? Because I know I met you on social and you lived in Tampa. How did you meet this guy?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like, wow, you brought her. Or when our homegirls that was here with her in that room when she's like, yo, let's meet across. They had set that up.

[Corey]

I don't know. But I just. For you, for you to have never been to Atlanta before, and then I bring you out here two or three times and now you're dating somebody from Atlanta. It's like you wasn't even exposed. Like, everything we were doing was her first, her first time to dc. Her first. Like, she was. That's what I liked about her. Everything was new, everything was fun. Like, this is my spots. I'm like, oh, you ain't never been to a basketball game? I got, I went to Tick Pig and got some seats four rows down. Like, you ain't never been. You ain't never been in the Harris or the Delta Sky Club?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah. It's like, oh my gosh. Here's the thing. Once you give someone a taste of that, somebody might have came and trumped you. Like, yo, I did my research.

[Corey]

Not that I was like trying to stun or nothing. Like, I'm just doing stuff I like

[Donnie Wiggins]

to do, you know, for sure.

[Corey]

We did very simple things too. Like I'm, I'm a very, I'm a pretty simple dater, I would say. I, I adjust to what you like. Like, what do you like what I like? Okay, let's figure out a way to make this work.

[Donnie Wiggins]

How did this situation make you feel? Like when you saw that she was in a relationship two months later, oh, man, it hurt.

[Corey]

It hurt because, you know, I, I've dealt with a lot of loss. Like my ex before that who, you know, like, she broke up with me when she went to medical school. Well, she went to become a doctor in Philadelphia. So, like, I, I was broken up then as well. After four years of, of, you know, sewing seeds and, you know, being a great partner. Then I had a business partner breakup, you know what I'm saying? So, like, I'm like, dang, am I, is it me? Like, am I, am I, am I self aware enough to know where I lack so that I could, like, fix these things? Am I not communicating properly? Like, at some point you have to say, is it you? And I think that all those situations were just situational and where people were in their life and we just might have not been in each other's life at the right time. I mean, part and partly could be my fault on some things as well.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So. Yeah, I think. I think it needs to be explored, though.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Because your last two relationships, they left you. And not. Not even necessarily saying that it's your fault. But it needs to be explored. There has to be something where we say, okay, why? What is it about me? Do I think this person is not feeling?

[Corey]

Yeah, I definitely contributed to it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Right. Like, what would you think it is? Okay, let me ask this question. This is where I'm. I'm led to.

[Corey]

Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I think you love hard.

[Corey]

Absolutely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And sometimes you can love so hard where it pushes a woman away. Especially possible in that situation with the young lady, maybe you're moving too fast for her. But the fact that she moved into a relationship and didn't move fast again.

[Corey]

Yeah, I thought that at one point I was like, maybe it was too much.

[Grainger Advertiser]

And.

[Corey]

And there was times. And for that last relationship, there was. We, like, never asked each other to be boyfriend and girlfriend. We just were together all the time. So I'm like, we're together. Like, I'm not talking nobody else. You know, we already said we were, like, committed to not talking to anybody else. And there was hesitancy because I would say the same thing with my first ex. With the ex before that, I interrupted their natural life pattern because we met randomly. So my ex, I was a doctor. She was in here at medical school, like, trying to become a doctor. We just happened to meet at community service. And so, like, she was always going to be here to be a doctor, and she was always going to go for the best. Like, she's Indian, like her family. She was always going to do that. And so I always, when I look back, I say I interrupted her. Her pattern that she was going in. It doesn't mean it was a negative interruption. It just was an interruption.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

With this young lady, she was on a journey. She had just got out of relationship. Actually, the November before that, around that time. October, November, it was kind of already over, but officially, October, November of the year before that, in February, here I come. I'm interrupting. Even though it's not meant to be malicious. But yeah, maybe there was some more healing or some more. There was a journey that she needed to be on that I kind of. I Kind of delay some of that progress. And then I think maybe when you see something happens or is a red flag that you see, then you're like, I should have. I never finished. And it's like, all right, well, let me just finish down. But then you find somebody else. So it's like, you can look at it a bunch of different ways, but I try to just, like, reflect on what I could have done better because it's easy to say, oh, well, you didn't, you didn't. But, like, what could I have changed or done better? And when I reflect on that, I really think that part of it is like, listening to my partner more and hearing what they say when they're not happy or complain about something, really just hearing it and. And being able to process it and then act in a way that feels safe. I didn't say that I have been unsafe. But like, you women, they like to be reassured, right? And sometimes I'm like, I could be cold sometimes not in a way that's like, I'm not trying to be rude, but you'd be like, oh, I need this. And I'm like, all right, cool. I, like, agree. But it's not like, I'm not like, okay, cool. How else could I, you know what I'm saying? I make him take that extra step. And so I just kind of like. It's easy to. Hindsight is 20 20. It's easy to, like, look back on it, like, when it's over. So. Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah. So what. What does dating look like now? Like, what do you. Obviously, on social media. I see you are looking. You are actively looking.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What does it look like now? What are you doing?

[Corey]

I'm not doing anything right now. It's not that I'm not looking.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You're not going on dates right now?

[Corey]

Not really. I. I don't find people that I find interesting enough to want to date right now when I do. Like, so I'm. I have like a. A semi strict rule where, like, a coffee day is always the first date for me.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Coffee day.

[Corey]

If you don't want to do coffee, then it's cool. I'm good. Like, because it's just an easy entry point and it's light. It's light. Like, it's like, if. If we enjoy this conversation one time more, let's do something else. Let's go eat. Let's go do an activity. Yeah, but. But coffee is just the intro. They like, I don't drink coffee. Well, they got tea, they got croissants, they Got donuts.

[Grainger Advertiser]

They got.

[Corey]

They got everything. It's just a time for us to be in public, talk, chat.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And so Atlanta, that might be looked at as, like, this is my cheapest

[Corey]

end, you know, it is. Because I'm not about to spend money on all these people that I'm not with. So, like, when. And you've seen me in a relationship, when I'm in, I'm in. I don't mind spending money, but, like, imagine if I'm going to dinner twice a week every month. You're looking at 4 or 5, 600, and it's like, I'm getting nothing from. That's a bad investment. Someone. Someone said, that's a bad investment. So, like, coffee's like, all right, I spend $20, $30, and if we like each other in the school, let's do something else. I'm like, let's hang out tomorrow. If I really like you, let's do something again. So most people don't even make it past that. And it's like, that's. This is why we had coffee.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So you are. You play a role at change? Yeah, Right. What do you do?

[Corey]

Marketing.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You do the marketing for the church? Yeah. Okay, so market change. You got some people in there, A lot of people. I ain't gonna lie to you.

[Corey]

A lot of people in there.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And it's a lot of women. It's almost like the spiritual loft. You're not like the loft. The way Jason Lonnie built that joint, bro, it ain't nothing but vibes in there. You feel me?

[Corey]

That's why I don't work out there now. Once I get in shape, then I work out there. But I'm not gonna work out there.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Of course. For sure. At church, you do the marketing. So you're visual in front of all these.

[Corey]

And I host all our stuff.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And you host. So you're being looked at as, whoa, that's one right there. And they all know you single. Yeah. Is it difficult to not kind of poop where you eat?

[Corey]

Absolutely. I think self discipline is really important. I'm very aware of how I appear and then what people see as well. Like, I brought my friends to church that are women that are like, I'm not interested in dating. And they're like, who is that?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Who is that?

[Corey]

Like, even, like. Like, my friend, like, Milan or like, Donnie will come and I'll, like, hug them like, oh, you like, oh, no, my friends. But, like, people see everything, and because we sit in the front is like, you. I don't even Know who's looking behind me? I have no clue. I bought my friend sue one Sunday. Somebody text me, like, who's that? I'm like, dang, it's my friend. This is my homie. She on my page many times. Like, that's my dog. So that's one part about it. Like, aesthetics. Right. When you work in ministry and I say, I run a Bible study, so it's the same thing. I will never date nobody for my Bible study because I am shepherding. I'm leading people. And it can be seen as predatory. Like, oh, you're the leader. There's a certain. Whatever.

[Donnie Wiggins]

There's a connection with one. And it's a. I mean, it's tough

[Corey]

because I had that kind of happen. And, like, now she know. Like, it didn't even get to a point where it's too crazy. But, like, she don't even come to our Bible study anymore. She's lost her community because.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Because they went on that first coffee date.

[Corey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like. But then, like, if it don't work out now, you feel like you're looking at me differently. It's just different.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Sure.

[Corey]

And so I just try not to do that. And plus, I think where you worship is supposed to be sacred. So, like, when I. When I come to the house, I don't want to be like, I wonder if so. And so I'm gonna be here. Or if I want to bring somebody's, like, they're gonna be looking at me. Or if they bring somebody, like, trying to walk in front of me, like, it's tough.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That's not the place where you're supposed to find your mate. Because we clearly have the same beliefs. And, you know, I think it's a

[Corey]

great spot to find somebody, I think, in my position, a little harder. Yeah. Like, because I'm so visible, I think it makes it a little harder. If I was just somebody who came and left as soon as service is over, it'd be different.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

But I'm also, like, on stage, I'm also like, with the pastor sometimes I'm also like, it's different. So I think I just have to be more cautious. But it is possible. I do think it's possible.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Does your pastor or, like, first lady ever be like, hey, Corey, That's.

[Corey]

Yep.

[Tammy]

All the time.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Really? Yeah.

[Corey]

First lady. She was supposed to be hooking me up with somebody. First lady.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Corey]

She asked me to send her a list of, like, things I like or I want a woman.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And let's run through that List real quick.

[Corey]

I got it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You had the list? Yeah, I had the list.

[Corey]

I sent to her especially.

[Donnie Wiggins]

How many items are on the list?

[Corey]

It's not a lot. It's not a lot.

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's not a lot.

[Corey]

Okay. I feel like I'm a pretty simple guy.

[Donnie Wiggins]

We're gonna expand the list today.

[Corey]

Yeah, well, maybe we should.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I'm telling you. Because if it's not, I think it shouldn't be too much.

[Corey]

You want, you want, you want me to read it or you want to say it?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Let me read it. Let me read it. Okay. All right. My preferences. Love Jesus and attend church regularly. Okay. 90s fine, it's very. Not 2026 fine. 2026 fine is different because in the 90s. In the 90s. So the way you described it is a clean, natural, simple look that is timeless.

[Corey]

Absolutely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

2026 fine is Botox

[Corey]

BBL over overly done makeup.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Overly. The lips are a little extra. Yeah, got the little Kim lips. 2026 fine is different. You're right. New teeth. Everybody got new teeth.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

I don't mind.

[Corey]

New team, it's cool.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I mean, I'm just saying. Yeah, but I, I, I'm for the audience. I'm explaining.

[Corey]

Absolutely, absolutely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Thank you for the clarity. Yeah, yeah, I like the way you put that. Okay, so 90s fine and wait, some

[Corey]

people think that 90's fine and they not. And that's a whole nother story.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But, well, but fine is in the eye of the beholder.

[Corey]

Yeah, but 90s is specific. There's a specific era when you look at like the Jada piggies, the Neil Longs, like, there's a, there's a look that was happening in the 90s.

[Donnie Wiggins]

They had, they, they had their original teeth. The original model. Yeah, I'm just saying, 90s fine, no kids unless it's a very specific situation. Absolutely no kids.

[Corey]

I would prefer no kids unless it's a very specific situation. So what I mean by that is, like, you have help in a community that you can, you can get a babysitter last minute if you need to. Like, I've dealt with women who just, it just would never worked out because it was always something with the child. Yeah, I got always. And so I was like, I don't mind because I know as we get older, people will have kids. It can be unrealistic. But the situation has to be conducive.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay. We got athletic in the gym a few times a week.

[Corey]

Yeah, you gotta go every day.

[Donnie Wiggins]

A few, but you gotta go.

[Corey]

Yeah, I go full time. I went this morning, 5:00am Sheesh.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay. Career. I don't care what she is doing, as long as it is honorable and something she loves.

[Corey]

Absolutely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So she can't be a bottle girl? No.

[Corey]

I don't want nobody in the club.

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's hard. I mean, it's. It's. Is that not honorable work?

[Corey]

Is it honorable?

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't know. This is your list.

[Corey]

Yeah. I don't think that's honorable. Not. But not. Not saying they're a bad person because you gotta do what you got to do. Get your money. But you're. You're putting yourselves in a situation to be surrounded by a lot of stuff that I don't partake in. So. I used to work in the club. I know what happens in the club.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You know what's going on. But yeah, you gotta be a little extra to get the tip. Yeah.

[Corey]

You gotta flirt a little. You gotta do. You gotta get the money. Get your money.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Money.

[Corey]

I'm not mad at you. Get your money. You just. Not for me. In this season of your life.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Hon.

[Grainger Advertiser]

Wow.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay. I like that. This is a good list.

[Corey]

Not bad.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Long as honorable Something she loves style, has some fashion sense and can help both of us.

[Corey]

Absolutely. I'd be needing to.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay.

[Corey]

Not a big ass.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Can't be out here looking crazy. Somebody. This question. So could you date somebody who just. Every time they come out, they just crazy.

[Corey]

You know, my first ex kind of couldn't. Dr. My Indian. The doctor, he fixed it. Yeah. Yeah. Slowly but surely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay.

[Corey]

It's the way you do it too.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like, so it's not a deal breaker. It's just one thing that you like.

[Corey]

Yeah. I like when a girl can be like, oh, this looks good together. Like, let me. Because I used to ask my sister for help. I still do. I'll be like, tiara. What does it. What does it look like? She'd be like, oh, yeah, do this, do this. But like, to have, like a partner that can do that. Oh, I would love that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

Absolutely. Get me right.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I want to be able to see buttering qualities. Oh.

[Corey]

Nurturing typo.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I want her to be able to be strong where I'm weak. One who is deeply rooted in their family values. Kind and enthusiastic and optimistic about life. That's actually a strong list.

[Corey]

Not too much.

[Donnie Wiggins]

No. Yeah, that's.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

No, it's.

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's not too much, but I think it's just enough because there's layers to your answer. That is a really good list.

[Corey]

Thank you.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Is that a unicorn? Is that hard to find kids that list. That list, it's not right.

[Corey]

You don't think so?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yo, for real. For real. And I'm not about to make it weird, bro.

[Corey]

I never found that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yo. I'm not gonna make it weird, but, yo, that whole. As I was reading it, yo, K. Is that whole list. You're essentially that list, right? I mean, yo, she's. I'm just driving a little seat. She's the list.

[Corey]

Thank you for that.

[Aura Advertiser]

Thank you.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What. What do you think you need to work on? And I'm coming back to that question because I didn't get a clear answer. Okay, you. From your perspective, what are. Give me. Give me the list of things you need to work on. Yeah,

[Corey]

I think it starts with, like, being a good listener. I think I listen well. But sometimes when, like, I. I'm gonna use. I'm say no when I know I'm right, it's hard for me to listen. And sometimes what I. What I found in my relationships and just women I've talked to or dealt with is that they don't always have to be ready. They just want to be heard, even if they know they wrong.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

And sometimes I'm like, I'm. I'm such a common sense person. Like, here's the facts. This is common sense. We don't even need to talk about this anymore. But I've understood from experience that, like, some people just want to be heard and want to be understood. And so I learned that a lot with the last woman that I was talking to.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay, listen more. What else?

[Corey]

I would say that patience. I have a low tolerance for stupidity. And

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't know if I like the way you're framing it.

[Corey]

I. I may have said that wrong.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Horrible way to.

[Corey]

I don't mean. And I don't mean it like, I don't want to call anybody stupid, but, like, it's common sense. Like, common sense things. Once again, I. I just have a little tolerance for it. Like, why would you do that?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like, I don't think you're being accountable right now.

[Corey]

Why do you say that?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Because your first answer was, I need to listen more. And the way you said to listen more was, I don't know, I gotta read it back. But it was like there was an escape in there. The second thing you just said was I need to. What was the second one?

[Corey]

First one was patience.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Patience?

[Corey]

Yeah, patience.

[Donnie Wiggins]

He said, I don't have patience for dumb stuff.

[Corey]

Meaning things I consider dumb.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Exactly. But what you're saying is you need to work on dealing with someone's nonsense, essentially.

[Corey]

But to them, yeah, I could have worked.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You're saying common sense.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Is not common. What's common to you? There's a bunch of things that me and my wife will look at as. You should know that. And I don't, unfortunately. I know a bunch of stuff. This thing I don't know.

[Corey]

Right.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So let's. Let's run that tape back.

[Corey]

Okay. Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay.

[Corey]

That's fair.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Things you need to work on.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Let's start with patience.

[Corey]

So definitely patience, I would say. Rather than that, I would say giving people the space that they deserve in order for me to understand better. Maybe that's a better way to put it.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

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[Donnie Wiggins]

Go a little deeper. I want to know that you understand.

[Corey]

I would say so. I think sometimes, like, let's just. Let's give an example. Like, I say, hey, before. Okay, if you're watching my dog, right? Very big part of my life at nighttime, I'm like, hey, can you make sure all the blinds are down when the. When. When you leave? Or, you know, at a certain time when it gets dark? Because I don't live in the best neighborhood. I got the nice house in the hood, so just put the blinds down. I come home, and they're not down. And you just sit on the couch chilling. I'm like, oh, I. I told you to, like, put the blinds down. Like. And she might be like, oh, my bad. I got into this show when I. Whatever, whatever. Because it's not really a huge deal, but I'm looking at, like, the future. Like, somebody looked at my house. They kind of see the layout. Like, so I'm seeing those things. She's not knowing that I'm thinking like that. So instead of, like, going off on her immediately, kind of explain calmly, like, hey, this is why I say this. Like. And, you know, just kind of, at least the first time, be like. You know, just. This is very important to me. Like, emphasize how important it is sometimes on the first time. Like, come on, man. Like. And I'm already pissed because when I'm walking up, I'm seeing the windows open, and I'm like, if I can see in, I know somebody else can see in.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

So this is what I'm thinking. So, like, not being so quick to try to correct, but just, like, people are humans. Like, you was watching Love island and you got caught up. I get it. Like, so that's what I mean. I think that's what I'm saying about patients.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't like the list, bro.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Really?

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's a terrible list. No, it's a horrible list because, okay, even when we double down, I need patience with where you're weak. But this isn't a fix me list that's happening right now. Let me give you an example, okay?

[Grainger Advertiser]

I.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Where I need to get better is I shut down, and I will not talk to you for a while.

[Corey]

Okay?

[Donnie Wiggins]

The thing that. That happened, that made me shut down could not be that big, but I shut down.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

I just.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yo, what's crazy is my son is starting to pick it up too, because I can, like, correct him some way, and he will, like, run away and just go into his room and just be in his room. Kids, three. But this is a 100% fault of mine. This has nothing to do with me being patient with you not putting the blinds out as I told you to.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

The list that I'm trying to get you to create is looking deeper inside. What is wrong with you? I got a bunch of stuff wrong with. With me. Right? But I haven't heard you say something that is your fault without someone else being involved.

[Corey]

I think because when we're talking about relationship, I'm thinking of, like, me and my partner for sure. So, like, I think. I think there's different things you need to Work like some. Like, only for yourself, like, as a human. Then I think there's, like, in partnership. So my thought is in partnership. That's why I'm mainly using.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But, no, that's the same. So I'm a partnership with my wife. I need to be more considerate. I'm not considerate.

[Corey]

I would agree with that for me as well.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay, give me a list. Give me a list. It doesn't have to do with them being some. Doing something wrong. Because we could say I need to be. I need to listen more. Let's say I need to listen more. What they're telling me is, I know I'm right. That was it. You're saying I'm right.

[Corey]

Right.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I know I'm right. So I need to listen to their perspective. Meaning they're wrong. And I need to tolerate it, essentially.

[Corey]

Oh, I see. Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That's a difference than saying, I see what you're saying. I am not considerate. I need to consider my w. Bro. If I'm out of town, I need to think. To call her more. Because I know where she's thinking. I know she's wondering what's going on. And I can use. I use the excuse that I'm busy, but this is simply me being inconsiderate. So let's start this list over.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I'll frame it this way.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Where are you toxic?

[Corey]

Yeah. I never heard anybody call me toxic. I think consideration is. Because when you broke it down like that, I. I thought of times where I could have been more considerate. And that oftentimes that comes with communication and listening and those things. So I think consideration is important. I think that I could be more emotionally available.

[Donnie Wiggins]

We getting somewhere, Corey? Come on.

[Corey]

Maybe. Emotionally available in what way?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Because it seems like you love hard now, though.

[Corey]

Yeah, No, I still do. I. I'm not tainted by anything I've been through. I think it just helped me. Help me build understanding and ask more questions early.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

But I think sometimes I would say for me, I have to just let myself. How do I explain this? I have to be more vulnerable and open because that creates a safe space for somebody else to do so as well. And so sometimes when I'm just, like, so, like, hard. Get to it. Hustle these things. It can come off as I'm not available and open to receive what you may need. So I definitely need to, like, just be. I don't want to use the word softer, but a little softer.

[Tammy]

Right?

[Corey]

Like, you don't have to be so hard, especially in a space that's supposed to be safe.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

I would.

[Corey]

I would say anything else. I'm sure there's a whole list of things.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I mean, here's what I like you to do. You know, you don't have the list of things you want.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You need to make the same list of things you need to fix.

[Corey]

Absolutely. I can agree with that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

I can definitely.

[Grainger Advertiser]

I don't.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't think you've analyzed these women that you're really into leaving you. And maybe we chalk it up to okay. She could say, well, God told me to distance myself, but it was something.

[Corey]

Always a reason.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But we gotta. We gotta dig a little deeper.

[Corey]

Yeah, for sure. I can agree with that. I think when you can be self aware and do that work, it's. It's very valuable. And I also lean on people I like. I talk to people in my circle. I ask, like, how did I handle that situation? Or like, I'll ask questions and if they tell me I'm wrong, I'm like, yeah, you're right.

[Tammy]

Yeah.

[Corey]

Kind of messed up. And so I'll like, you know, apologize. And like, I'm. I'm not. I'm not over being corrected. Like, I'm not too good for that. Like, I think correction is. Is excellent so you don't make the same mistake again.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Cool. Do you drink? No. Never. Or ever now again? Never. Smoke?

[Corey]

Never.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Hookah?

[Corey]

Never.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay. Do you want to wait until you're married for intimacy?

[Corey]

Yeah, that'd be the ideal plan. Yes, absolutely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Do you think you rush the marriage?

[Corey]

No, I ain't rushing marriage.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Not for sex. Well, I mean, easier said than done. Yeah. N. I was connected with somebody like this gonna be my wife anyway. Every day that goes by, you just.

[Corey]

Yeah. I think that it doesn't control me in that way to where I would rush marriage. Marriage is a big decision.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

I'm not somebody that believes that once you're married that you should split. I believe that that's your partner for life. You chose that partner. So that's why I would consider myself to be very picky and trying to make a wise decision because I date to marry. I don't date to date. I'm not dating just to have fun. If I don't see you as someone like, physically, emotionally, those things in the first few times we talk like that. Give me my wife. I'm not gonna waste your time.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

There's no point, like, depending on who it is.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I think sexual frustration can cloud judgment.

[Corey]

I think so too.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You know, I agree with that.

[Corey]

I. I definitely. Especially if someone is like. Some people have, like, more sex appeal than others.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

Because of the type of woman I typically date, they're more like a simple. They don't. Like, present in sexual ways is a little easier, but I think if I went the more Instagram model route, it would probably be harder. But typically, I don't lean towards that. I like that, but people think I do because I'm around people who may appear that way sometimes, but I don't. I don't feel that that's my type.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Got it. Could you date someone that doesn't. That the key dates. One that drinks.

[Corey]

That drinks. Are they in control of it or like. Like, how often are you drinking?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like, I mean, every night we go out, have a drink.

[Corey]

Oh, no, that's. That's no problem.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay.

[Corey]

You want a lemon drop at dinner?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah. Okay.

[Corey]

Do your thing.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What about someone that casually smokes?

[Corey]

I don't really like smoking. Smoking is not my thing. I'm not really a big fan of smoking. I've never also dated anyone that smoked for real, so I can't say that I have a large experience with that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Got it. Are you cool with someone who doesn't want to wait till a marriage before intimacy?

[Corey]

Am I cool with it? What's the reasoning?

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's just they don't feel the need that we have to wait until. Because, I mean, at the end of the day, waiting for marriage guarantees nothing.

[Corey]

Yeah, I don't think it's about that. I think it's about if you say you truly follow Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, then you want to make. Because that's the covenant that the Bible says. So if you. I want somebody that has the same religious beliefs as me, someone who loves Jesus Christ. So if that's not what you. You want to do, or that's not what you do, then we probably wouldn't be right for each other anyways. But if you're saying you're trying to live a Christ life, like Christ, like life, then you would be trying to. At least. It's not to say you won't mess up because I've messed up.

[Tammy]

I ain't.

[Corey]

I'm not above that. But you would be on that same trajectory as me, so.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Well, but again, that. That may be a little unfair because you said the one young lady, she attacks you essentially, and you fell to it. Right?

[Corey]

That's true. But the Bible also says flee. I did not flee.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You didn't flee.

[Corey]

I did not flee.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Which means you're not trying to be Christ.

[Corey]

Like, I had a moment of weakness because I'm human, right? Like, I'm not God. I gotta. I have to lean on God for those things.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So the only reason I'm going down this is because sometimes in that line of question, when people say, yo, I want to wait until marriage, it's a cool thing to say, but that's not really my desire.

[Corey]

It's tough. It's tough, right? Like, you have to constantly deny yourself of something that your body wants, your emotions want. I desire that. I would like that. But I. I'm. I'm not too. I'm not too naive to think that that couldn't happen. And that's not the end all for me. Like, I would. I was still open to pursuing that relationship.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah. But the probability, if. Let's just say y' all are having a conversation and you're like, well, I mean, we might date for two years and nothing happened. And she's saying, well, that doesn't seem realistic to me. I don't think that that is the end. All end be all of us being together.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Right?

[Donnie Wiggins]

So that's what I'm saying in this situation. She's essentially saying, well, I don't feel the need to wait till Mary.

[Corey]

I think it's how you position it too. Because, like, if you position like that, I'm like, all right, cool. But if it's like, from the day one is like, yeah, I don't want to wait. It's like, that's a little different energy. Right.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But that's just being honest.

[Corey]

It is, it is. But like, okay, are.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You want to. You want to wait till marriage? You want to wait till marriage? Okay, cool. But we won't know until you're in a situation with someone. You really, absolutely look at them as really easy to.

[Corey]

To say that when you don't have nobody to like that you want to do that with. It's very easy to say it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So what do you think probability is that you're. You're with someone, yell at each other every single day, and we are. We are together, together. What is the probability of that actually happening?

[Corey]

Like, for me, zero percent. I'm zero percent. Because I've never got married. So that's just my own personal stats.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That's what I'm saying. So. But I just. I don't want to be thrown off by that conversation. Dinner, first date, you're like, well, I don't. I realistically. Realistically don't think, yeah, I want to wait until marriage. I mean, I'll wait until we're in a serious relationship, of course. But I don't want to wait till marriage.

[Corey]

I think, you know, my own personal opinion is that, like, when you're actively seeking and trying to be as much like Christ as possible, that's what God wants.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yes, for sure.

[Corey]

He died on a cross for our sins, so he knows we're going to sin. It doesn't mean you just freely sin and do what you want to, but you should also be trying to seek living that Christ life. Like, so. So I just think that I want somebody who also is going to, like, try to seek that with me.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

With the understanding at least will say it. Yeah. Not to say, but at least try. Like, please try. And then. And then if it happens, like, you know, we talk about we. We kind of like, we need to get to the point of like. So I used the girl I was dating last, for example too. I saw on the post when they got married. She said that they never kissed before they got married. I think from our situation, it was so like, it. It shook her up so much, they didn't even kiss before they got their marriage was their first kiss. So like, like is. Does it have to be that extreme? Maybe it does. If you know what your triggers are, you should probably stay away from those triggers.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, for sure.

[Corey]

Right? So like, if I'm cuddling beside you, probably don't touch my leg. I should probably let you know that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But even the cuddle, I mean.

[Corey]

Yeah, but I'm just like. If I'm just used. I just use a random example. But like, I think trying to stay away from triggers is like, where you start.

[Donnie Wiggins]

If you.

[Corey]

If we have the same end goal, the North Star is the same. And then we know what can deter us from that North Star. Let's just try to start there by not getting to that point where you can be triggered.

[Donnie Wiggins]

No, that's good. That's good. But I believe. I believe even watching movies in the evening is a gateway drug, bro. It's a gateway. Yo. Hugging and then you start. You start with the kids, isn't. It's. The kiss is a gateway and people

[Corey]

struggle with different things. I know my pastor talks about, like, listening to R and B music sometimes and he's like, that's. That's never been a struggle for me. That doesn't. That's not what. Like, I don't hear army music and want to go cheat on my wife. That's not my. My testimony. Some people, that is. They hear pretty Ricky.

[Donnie Wiggins]

They.

[Corey]

They ready to get down.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

Everybody don't have that same conviction. And so if you know what yours is, you should probably stay away from that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, for sure.

[Corey]

And some. Some people are like, if you touch me, kiss me, whatever. I know, I'mma just get going. So you just got to know yourself. That's. That's a lot of self awareness.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Can you date someone that used to be gay?

[Corey]

No. Because you're. I mean, well, it used to be gay. Like, you just decided you're not gay. No, more like.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I mean.

[Corey]

And you say gay. Do you mean in a relationship or just like. Okay, like, I've messed with a girl before.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like a girl. Because I think it's a little.

[Corey]

It's a double standard. Like, I think. I feel like it is to the world, but to me, if, like, if you were in relationship with a woman and you actively like, like women like

[Donnie Wiggins]

that, I couldn't do it actively right now.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

It's just.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I used to have this lifestyle. No, no, I'm okay. You're okay.

[Corey]

There's enough women who don't like women.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What if they're healed? She doesn't like women right now.

[Aura Advertiser]

Who?

[Donnie Wiggins]

She's healed. This hypothetical situation.

[Corey]

I don't think so.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You don't think so. Okay. All right. I mean, it's a fair answer.

[Corey]

And then I have. I have more question. Like, which one were you in the relationship? Like, I got a lot of questions. If you was the guy in a relationship, you just. Your look check. Because, you know, people be changing their whole looks. I really like. It's a lot of questions.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But you want athletic, you play ball. Little tomboy. Come on. You. You.

[Corey]

There's a bunch of beautiful women who play basketball.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Beautiful old.

[Corey]

That are not gay exactly.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But that would probably be. The more. I don't want to say the guy. I don't want to say that. But the more. What's it called, like, competitive. No, what's it. What's it called where they're. The more. And I don't even.

[Corey]

Like masculine presented.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah. More matte.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Corey]

Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't. I don't. I don't even want to talk about it because I might be saying it wrong. I might be. Yeah, you get really? Yes. Okay. All right.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Last. Last thing. How do we handle. Okay. Her level of financial literacy. How important is that to you?

[Corey]

Very important. You don't have to, like, have a ton of money, but just know how to work with what you got. Just know how to. To make a dollar last. Right. Like, I've been in seasons Where I've

[Donnie Wiggins]

been up, up, up, up.

[Corey]

I've been in seasons. Where I've been down, down, down.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

So, like, I need you to be able to, like, keep me even keel and level in those. In those situations. I haven't always been the best with money. And so from my experience, I've learned a lot so that I won't make the same mistakes. I just need to be on the same. On the same level as that. Like, what you do as a. Your job doesn't really matter to me as long as it's honorable, Those. Those things. But, like, just like, if you. If you living off of 5,000amonth and you survive and you living a solid life for you, cool.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Uh, 300 credit score. You do it.

[Corey]

300.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I think that might be the lowest, ain't it?

[Aura Advertiser]

300?

[Corey]

No, I can't do 300.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That they just have a trash credit score.

[Corey]

Why do they, like, did their parents put their name on stuff early?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like, I mean, just. They suck at money right now. So what I'm saying is. But here's the problem. Here's the problem with the answer is because you meet them and you don't realize they have a 300 credit score until you.

[Corey]

Right, that's. That's true. I think.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What was your access credit score? You might not know.

[Corey]

It was pretty good, actually.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You know it?

[Corey]

Yeah. Both of them. Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Pretty good.

[Corey]

And we had those conversations because both those times I had business things going on that we talked about those things.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

So it just happened to come up. I'm not. That's not. It's not a. It's not a part of my initial questions.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, for sure.

[Corey]

So I will say, because you're in.

[Donnie Wiggins]

By the time you realize they have

[Corey]

a 300 credit score, I think. I think you ask enough questions and see enough things to know, like, there. There'll be signs. Yeah, there will always be signs. And someone who's always forgetful of things and like, you look at some of the things they bought and like, where you live at versus this versus what you say you make, it's like. Yeah, you can put it together if you truly are looking and trying to be intentional on how you date.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Got it. Have you ever cheated?

[Corey]

No. Never?

[Donnie Wiggins]

Never.

[Corey]

And I. Let me say this. Physically cheated. I think that, like, men, like lust can be considered cheating as well.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Especially if you're on the way out of the relationship.

[Corey]

Yeah. Lust and, like, having inappropriate conversations. I've had inappropriate conversations, and I don't mean, like, like the nasty, but sometimes I Just have conversations you shouldn't have with somebody that's not your. Your partner. But I wouldn't. I haven't, like, cheated on somebody.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Got it. Okay. All right, last question. Let's say the woman wants a big extravagant wedding.

[Corey]

Just had this conversation with somebody. I'm actually not a. So you. This is what I want. Now, obviously, what my partner wants is going to be a woman dreams of her wedding.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, typically.

[Corey]

I know it's changed a little bit. I'm cool with a courthouse wedding. Yeah, there's a courthouse in San Francisco. I think it is beautiful stairs. Do the whole photo shoot. You bring your close friends and family out there. You get married, your best friend, your two best friends, my two best friends, my mom, my sister. You know, the people that deserve to be there and really need to be there. And we get married, sign the paperwork is a union, and then I think I would like to just have a party. You know, when you say you're having a party versus a wedding, the cost of the venue is much different.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Oh, for sure, for sure.

[Corey]

You should have a wedding of 20,000. That same venue is 5,000 for a party.

[Donnie Wiggins]

But what if the woman really desires a big wedding?

[Corey]

I would look.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What's the deal breaker?

[Corey]

I would ask questions. I don't think anything could be like, a deal breaker without finding out the root of why. So have you just seen it in the past? Is it something that your parents and that. Like, what's the reason why? Once I understand the reason, I can say, okay, well, let's look at our financial situation first. Let's look at, like, okay, if you want to spend X amount on a wedding, like, do we have a home? Like, are we. Are we putting out some money for a home? Like, what do you want to do for your honeymoon? Like, I think there's questions that have to be asked. I. I believe you should have what you desire, But I also believe that there are things that are financially smart and not. And this is like one of those things we just talked about finances. Like, you want to spend $50,000 on one day. I get it. Your day. But it's like, how is this pushing us forward as well? Like, because we're married through paperwork, whether we have the ceremony or not. Like, the paperwork says legally that we're married. That's what that is. This is just a celebration of it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, but you got to think about this little girl from 10 years old and watching her friends have these dope weddings. And that is a desire of her heart. And she doesn't want to go to the courthouse because she's been taught, but she deserves this. I imagine, being in love. Let's just say you're. You're not this last one, but the previous ex, because y' all were in love, live together. All that fornicating and, you know, I

[Corey]

mean, we also didn't live together. It was just Covid.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So, you know, the word fornication is hilarious.

[Corey]

It sounds like real bad.

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's real bad. Well, let's just say I do not want to get married until we can do it. The way I saw it in my head. Is that a deal breaker for you?

[Corey]

If she's not willing to budge on her stance, I would say, yes.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That would have been a deal breaker for me too. We went to the courthouse, and then she kept hinting at, yo, I want to have a wedding. I want to have a wedding. And I wasn't with it, but I did. She did say, okay, I have to have a wedding. And we compromised, and we went down to Orlando and had a wedding in of a lake. I want to say that lake was just a public lake, but it was nice, bro. It was Lake Lanierish. I ain't gonna hold you, but it was nice.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

No, I don't think it was no sand or beach or nothing.

[Corey]

It was just, amen.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Grass and water. But it was really, really nice, and I gave her that. I'm like, okay, we might have spent maybe 13,000.

[Corey]

You. You deserve. Like, she deserves it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

Like, this is somebody. I chose to be my wife. You deserve it for sure. It's just like, let's look at how do we fare after this? Yeah, we got $10,000 in debt. We spending 50,000. That just doesn't make sense to me. And my partner would understand that. And it's like, I also think, like, after milestone anniversary, you should get an upgraded ring if that's what you. If that's what you choose to want. Like, what. I think that it just. It's compromised in certain places.

[Donnie Wiggins]

She still got the same ring? Yeah. Yo, she said something a couple weeks ago about when you want to renew your vows, and I'm like,

[Corey]

I don't

[Donnie Wiggins]

want to do that. Yeah. I don't.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

I don't know.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't know the point. I don't get the point. But this is a part of me being more considerate.

[Corey]

Absolutely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So when she said it, I did not say what I saw in my head. I was like, oh, renew our vow. Okay. I mean, this. Let's. Let's plan it yeah. In my head, I'm like, sometimes you

[Corey]

choose peace over just like anything else, and I love peace. So, like, I'm gonna choose that if. If it's not too far from where we're going, like, we're still heading in the right direction, and it's just more peaceful for me. I'm choosing that every time.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay. All right. Corey, I think you're. I think you're. I think you're date worthy, bro. Oh, thank you.

[Corey]

I appreciate it. I try.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I think. I think you're gonna be a really, really good catch as soon as you take accountability and find out what's wrong with you. I need that list. We're gonna do a follow up, bro. I need that list for sure. For sure. You've identified that it's wrong with you that you gotta fix immediately.

[Corey]

Okay, I can do that.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

I. I'm.

[Corey]

I'm all for it. I'm all for self work. I'm all for it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I love it. All right. How can someone contact you and give me the process. Somebody's watching this right now. They're like, yeah, I do want to say something to court. I've been seeing them at the Bible study in his little suit. You know, a suit is crazy. I would. You don't wear suits? Church?

[Corey]

No, I don't.

[Donnie Wiggins]

No.

[Corey]

I dress just like this.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay, well, I've been seeing you at church. Your little pants and your Nikes. I like it. How should they approach you? Or how should they let themselves know that they're available?

[Corey]

You know, I like. I like for women to be just kind of straightforward with it. Because there's women who said, oh, I try to talk to you. I'm like, when? And he's like, I said hey to you in the lounge. I'm like, people speak to me all the time for different reasons. I don't know why you're speaking to me. I think making it known and clear, guys, we're not as smart as you may think we are in that aspect. We just don't know because I don't know. I don't want to assume your friendliness is you flirting.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah.

[Corey]

You could just be a friendly person. I've made that mistake before.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And then you play yourself. What are you doing?

[Aura Advertiser]

I had a boyfriend.

[Corey]

I just was saying, hey. It's like, see, that's why, you know, just tell me. But for me, like, I like you to just come as you are, like, be yourself. Don't try to spit game or none of that. Like, if you, if you're a jokester naturally say a joke. Like, I have. I had a girl try to roast me before, and it's like, I thought it was funny. I just wasn't attracted to it, but I thought it was hilarious. Hey, this will work on me if I liked you. But, yeah, just be yourself. Be authentic. I have people in my DMs. Not that I want, but people be in my DMs. I'm selling you, like, a bunch of women from, like, Nigeria and Africa. Just be in my DMs.

[Donnie Wiggins]

For some reason that actually live there,

[Corey]

that still live currently in the motherland.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What they be saying?

[Corey]

So handsome.

[Donnie Wiggins]

How do you hear their accent?

[Corey]

That was like, an Asian accent.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't know if it's right. I don't know if that's racist or that's. I don't know. I don't know what the car I think is. Like, I didn't know their accent. They just.

[Corey]

They say I'm handsome, I seem like a good guy. And they'll say, they, like. They say they're like, all their stats, like, I'm 31. I'm this. Like. They'll say all the information in the first message. It's, like, crazy.

[Donnie Wiggins]

This thing was a little bad. He's a change. Don't be doing that.

[Corey]

No, man.

[Donnie Wiggins]

What? All right, here's. Here's the end. Here's the end, y'. All. If you are showing attraction, I want you to DM Corey and just say, I saw the episode. We're gonna assume that if you just, like, I saw an episode. We're gonna assume that. That's a little flirt right there. Okay.

[Corey]

I can. I like. I like a good mini chat response.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah. Oh, cool. No, no, no, no. I'm just saying they might see it and then walk into your dm.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Like, hey, Corey, I saw your episode. And they might leave it right there because it's just easier to.

[Corey]

I like that. That's a good. That's a good entryway. I'm a fan, so I heard you. I don't know if it was. You were down here talking to somebody, and y' all were asking, like, do you approach somebody in public? I think it was Donnie. Like, would you go up to one while she's eating by herself and talk? And, like, for me, when I'm trying to pursue a woman or I'm interested, she looks good and I see her, I always try to find a commonality. So, you know, it might be like, you know, are you a Kass? You got pearls in your shoes? Like, I just like, one look. I just make one comment to like, break the ice. I think just a comment that you notice something. You notice, you know, you. A sneaker. I see wearing, like, whatever. Whatever it might be. I like that because it shows you, like, pay attention and you see something. And I just. I need that initial wall to be broken down.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Yeah, but you wouldn't know that.

[Tammy]

That.

[Donnie Wiggins]

That's flirting. You might just really like your shoes.

[Corey]

No, Just to start the conversation, just to open it.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I got you. I got you.

[Corey]

Like, I feel like a lot of guys come in, especially a lot of content creators. They come in with these pickup lines and stuff. Like, just break. I like to break that initial barrier of, like, you're a stranger, you come up to me. I don't know you don't know me. Let me find something that we have in common so I can just get us on a conversation. And then from there I kind of take it to see how it goes.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Gotcha. Okay, and last thing, body type.

[Corey]

I would like an athletic build. Not strong, but just athletic.

[Donnie Wiggins]

So not. Not super slim.

[Corey]

Yeah, Like, I like a little. I like a slim with a little body. It's cool. Obviously a shorter girl. I mean, I'm not. I'm like five nine. I'm like six two. Six two. You know what's funny on threads? Whenever I say I'm 6 2, the thread goes viral. But if I don't put my height, it doesn't. But I've been trolling on there. That's a whole nother story. But no, I'm like 59 and probably like 510 with Balenciaga's on. And I. I like to just look like I'm short. Yeah. I got a girl who, like, I can just like, hug. Like, hug down. It's cute. Natural look, very simple, like clean.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I don't know.

[Corey]

I don't ask for much.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You like a little weight on it? No.

[Corey]

What's the little weight?

[Donnie Wiggins]

It's a little weight.

[Corey]

A little way you could do something with a little weight. Like, because weight looks differently on different people.

[Donnie Wiggins]

You're right. And I'm only asking because some people like a little weight. Some people like them real. I got a friend, he's like, I'm real slim, but I also have a friend who like, like them weighty.

[Corey]

I like weight in the right areas, definitely.

[Donnie Wiggins]

Okay. You did really good, Corey.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Thank you.

[Donnie Wiggins]

I appreciate it. Let everybody know how to find you, man, and how they can start flirting.

[Corey]

Yeah, you can find me. I have aol. No, I'm sweating. I have an Instagram and tick tock and all of that. It's my name, Corey Arvinger, so I'm sure it'll be here on the episode. But you can search my name and find me like that.

[Donnie Wiggins]

There we go, man. Thank you for coming to the exit interview. Hey, send Corey a dm. We wanna. I want to see what happens.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Okay.

[Donnie Wiggins]

And if it works out, we definitely gonna air the episode, have a conversation.

[Corey]

Yeah, I'm doing a referral fee too, so.

[Donnie Wiggins]

$3,000 referral fee for sure. I get 10% of your happiness. That's awesome. We out of here, y'. All.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Peace.

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