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S25 Ep11: Long Term Impact - Something Was Wrong | Wave AI Podcast Notes

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S25 Ep11: Long Term Impact

Something Was Wrong

Fri Feb 27 2026

Summary

Episode Summary: "S25 Ep11: Long Term Impact"

Podcast: Something Was Wrong
Host: Tiffany Reese (Broken Cycle Media)
Date: February 27, 2026

Overview

This episode of Something Was Wrong continues to explore the long-term effects of abuse, institutional betrayal, and silence at the University of Central Oklahoma (UCO) by focusing on the testimony of Survivor Amy. Through her candid conversation with host Tiffany Reese, Amy recounts her teenage experience being groomed by Cato Buss, a theater director, and how this early relationship shaped her sense of self, relationships, and understanding of power dynamics for decades following the abuse. The episode also reflects on the systemic failures that allowed Buss to remain in power at UCO, shining a light on how patterns of abuse persist when institutions protect perpetrators.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction & Context

Amy, a longtime listener, reached out after recognizing Cato Buss’s name in earlier episodes, realizing her own story connected to the broader pattern of abuse at UCO.
The team underscores the emotional intensity of this season and the validation that comes from hearing Amy’s story, not only for her own healing but for other survivors.
Quote:

"It was also gut wrenching and eye opening to see just how long he's been at this."
— ABC (Amy B. Chesler), [08:11]

2. Amy’s Experience with Cato Buss (1998)

Meeting Cato: Amy met Cato during her senior year musical ("Chess") after her usual theater teacher was out due to injury. Cato, and his then-partner, entered as respected and charismatic directors.
- "He just seemed like a friendly, funny guy who commanded the space." – Amy, [11:14]
Developing Access and 'Special' Attention:
- Amy, cast as a lead, experienced Cato singling her out—private rehearsals, personal drives, and emotional intimacy developed.
- "The one on one personal attention started to grow. Soon we were going on rides together around town..." – Amy, [14:06]
- He created a personalized Leonard Cohen mixtape for her.
Boundary Crossing & Grooming:
- Their relationship escalated subtly, culminating in Cato kissing Amy backstage during the last night of the musical.
  - "He led me into the men's dressing room where he kissed me. It felt really exciting and exhilarating and just kind of crazy." — Amy, [19:11]
- He later made inappropriate overtures, calling her on prom night to say he wished he could take her—a moment she now recognizes as crossing boundaries.
  - "I thought that was a really lame thing for a 28 year old to tell an 18 year old..." — Amy, [16:57]
Immediate Aftermath:
- Amy describes feeling both excited and burdened by secrecy and confusion, hiding the interactions from her family and friends.

3. Long-Term Impact & Processing

Lack of Awareness of Power Imbalance:
- At 18, Amy didn’t recognize she was being groomed or that Cato was abusing his power.
  - "I was thrilled just to have attention... people wouldn’t have maybe called that an abuse of power." — Amy, [23:48]
Evolving Perspective and the Role of #MeToo:
- With maturity—and social shifts during #MeToo—Amy eventually identified the dynamics as manipulative and wrong.
  - "Certainly when me too kind of blew up, the framing changed... Even though my story... was relatively pg, I can see it for what it is now." — Amy, [24:36]
Shame and Secrecy:
- Shame and self-blame followed Amy for years—feeling "gross" about being singled out, and internalizing guilt around Cato’s relationship with his partner.
  - "I felt a lot of shame...he told me that he's not with his partner. So I wanted to believe that, but...it was not quite right." — Amy, [24:36]
- Therapy and time helped her release self-blame and recognize the impact of these early experiences.
  - "Time has given me perspective and I’m grateful to see things for what they are. That I was just a convenient young girl there at the right time at the right place." — Amy, [24:36]

4. Institutional Betrayal & Systemic Issues

Despite multiple women coming forward, UCO continued to promote Cato Buss—even amidst ongoing Title IX investigations.
The episode closes on the notion of “institutional betrayal,” reinforcing the sense of powerlessness and voicelessness many survivors experience.
- "Not just grooming, not just retaliation, but institutional betrayal. And as research continues to show, their experience is sadly not uncommon."
  — Tiffany Reese, [29:41]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Long-Term Impact:
"There is more to be said about the long term impact...while I've talked about how exciting that time felt, there was also the side of shame to it and secrecy." — Amy, [24:36]
On Institutional Betrayal:
"Despite multiple women coming forward over the course of several years, the University moved forward with promotion. For the survivors ... that decision reinforces what they have already experienced. Not just grooming, not just retaliation, but institutional betrayal."
— Tiffany Reese, [29:41]
On Perspective & Healing:
"Now I recognize shame is not a helpful feeling to have. Now I can see I’m not needing to put that blame on me... time and therapy and all of that has helped me come to a much more reasonable stance on it." — Amy, [24:36]

Important Timestamps

[06:04] Amy explains how she became connected to the podcast and recognized Cato’s name.
[09:03] Amy recalls her first interaction with Cato and the environment around their musical production.
[14:06] Amy describes how Cato began singling her out, leading to personal attention.
[16:57] The prom night phone call—boundary crossing becomes clear to Amy in hindsight.
[19:11] Cato kisses Amy backstage, the first physical boundary crossed.
[23:48] Amy reflects on her lack of understanding of power imbalances at the time.
[24:36] Amy processes her experience in adulthood, identifying shame and shifting perspectives through time and therapy.
[29:41] Host summarizes UCO’s continued institutional betrayal and its reinforcement of survivor trauma.

Episode Tone

The tone throughout the episode is compassionate, reflective, and unflinching. Amy’s story is told with emotional nuance and honesty. Host Tiffany Reese and co-producer ABC offer support, validation, and contextual insight, emphasizing the importance of survivor voices and institutional accountability.

Conclusion

The episode offers a striking account of how abuse of power can manifest in subtle, gradual ways—and how the emotional “long-term impact” can follow survivors for decades. It exposes both individual and systemic failures, calling for greater awareness, institutional change, and collective support for survivors. Amy’s journey from secrecy and shame to perspective and self-forgiveness serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of telling these stories—both for individual healing and cultural change.

Next Episode Preview:
The episode teases the story of Marissa, a college student who reports sexual assault and must navigate a lengthy, arduous institutional process.

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Transcript

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Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese) (0:59)

Something was wrong is intended for mature audiences and discusses topics that may be upsetting. Please consume the following episodes with care. This season discusses sexual, physical and psychological violence. For a full content warning, sources and resources for each episode, please visit the Episode Notes. Opinions shared by guests of the show are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Broken Cycle Media. The podcast and any linked materials should not be misconstrued as a substitution for legal or medical advice. We reached out to Professor Cato Buss and the University of Central Oklahoma for comment in response to allegations in the weeks prior to this episode's release. We have not received a response. Thank you so much for listening.

Survivor Amy (1:49)

You think you know me. You don't know me well at all.

Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese) (1:57)

You don't know anybody till you talk

Survivor Amy (2:07)

to someone.

Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese) (2:13)

Previously on Something Was Wrong.

Survivor Amy (2:16)

I had decided to study theater. Cato, who's the person that abused me, was the first person in the department that I met at all. I've never been in an environment where people adored a person more than the general population of students adored this person. Cato and I met winter of my senior year of high school at a recruiting event in North Texas. He was very paternal to me in a lot of ways. Whenever we first met, I was at his absolute beck and call. In college, later on, whenever shit kind of hit the fan, he relied on that loyalty a lot. The summer in between my freshman and sophomore year is when I really started to notice he is really focusing on Miranda. He cast me to Be the lead Eurydice. He would call me into his office once rehearsal had started. Almost every day before rehearsal, the hours before and after rehearsal looked very different after my confession of feelings towards him. I will not say that every single sexual experience I had with him was forced, but all of it carries the weight of the confusing aspects of being groomed and manipulated. I was one of the only people that she disclosed about this relationship to when it started. At the time, Morgan and I are in a play together. She had disclosed to me an experience she had where Cato had sexually harassed her on an away trip where alcohol was involved. I told Rihanna about what happened to me in 2015. She looked at me and she was like, he and Miranda are in a relationship. I told Rihanna, we have to report this. The next day I call my theater Ed advisor. That's when I got introduced to UCO's Title IX office. Funnily enough, I received the email of the Dean's decision the Friday that we were still at kcactf. Ultimately, she found him not responsible. I then decided that I wanted to file a Title IX complaint against him. I have the results that the university sent to me. Based on our conversation and your desired outcome, the university has implemented relative sanctions against the respondent and considers this matter closed and resolved. Within a month, my life was the same. His life was, as far as I know, pretty much the same. Nothing changed. That's when we agreed to do the lawsuit. She had told us that the media might pick it up. Because the media picks up things like this. I was not in any way prepared for it to be picked up so quickly. About a year after we filed the lawsuit, she let us know about a Supreme Court decision that came out that affected Title IX cases. And then I found a blog article talking about how one of UCO's Title IX lawsuits had been dismissed. The publication that released that the last were from uco, they didn't reach out to any of us. So I felt powerless and voiceless. We knew that the case would be dropped, but to actually find it out and not find it out directly from this attorney that had really made it seem like she cared was pretty awful.

Survivor Amy (14:06)

I did, even though it's been a long time and I can't recall the specific details. There would be musical practice after school and so I'm assuming that I probably saw him at the beginning of rehearsal or after rehearsal. We were having a conversation and maybe at that point we ended up going on drives. My best friend had said that she remembers me saying something about dropping him off at his house or going to his house, but I do not remember that. We'd have days where we focused on the music or other days that we did blocking. And so in those days there would be opportunities to have the one on one sessions or smaller groups for one. The one on one personal attention started to grow. Soon we were going on rides together around town and I would be the one driving. I'd pick him up because I think he was sharing a car with his partner. So I would pick him up and we would go on Drives around town. I don't know how many times that happened, but there were multiple drives. It would just be talking and conversation and probably some leg rubbing or hand holding one in particular. We ended up going to Dinosaur Hill, which is a hill in the middle of the town that I was from that kind of separated the east and west side of town. I just remember sitting on, I think like a cement dinosaur and having a conversation with him about who knows what. Those felt very meaningful, those rides. Like I don't know what we were talking about, but it felt important. And he did make me a mixtape of Leonard Cohen's songs, which I had a tape player in my car at the time and so that was probably on constant play. That made me feel like, oh wow, he really took the time to make this special tape. But then before I knew it, there was definitely a flirtatious dynamic that began. I know that I wasn't getting calls at home at the beginning. It was towards the end or after the production that I was getting calls. So it definitely escalated. I don't remember all of them, but I do remember probably one of the last calls I ever got from him. And it was the day of high school prom. I was getting ready for prom and he called. The phone was handed to me and I'm sure I was totally giddy and excited and talking about going to prom with my group of friends. And then he said that he wished he was taking me to prom, which made me feel gross even about that. I thought that was a really lame thing for a 28 year old to tell an 18 year old that they wanted to go to prom. Even I didn't really want to go to prom that bad.

Survivor Amy (24:36)

Yeah, for sure. I would feel like the start of that was the comments about wanting to take me to prom. I feel like that was a thing that planted the seed of. Even though I could draw on this experience for years after, that is an exciting one. That seed of ick started to grow. And certainly when me too kind of blew up, the framing changed as society was more open to hearing about these stories and women were sharing. Even though my story, it's not super scandalous and it was relatively pg, I can see it for what it is now. And as someone who is a woman, as a mother, I can see I wouldn't want my friends or my daughter to be in that kind of situation. I would want them to feel empowered, to see through it for what it really was, which was a power imbalance. I think that there is more to be said about the long term impact because while I've talked about how exciting that time felt and how good it felt to be singled out, there was also the side of shame to it and secrecy. I talked about the anxiety and what my body was experiencing during that time with anxiety. And I didn't really know to put the words shame and anxiety and tie that to what my body was doing at the time. But certainly the shame lasted the longest compared to like the excitement. I felt a lot of shame because it felt like, oh, I'm just this girl who any person that gave her attention, she'll just melt into that. I felt a lot of shame about that and I felt the most shame about like, well, he told me that he's not with his partner. So I wanted to believe that, but it was like I always felt that was not quite right. And so that was a big source of shame for me as well. And that even grew more through the years. Now I recognize shame is not a helpful feeling to have. Now I can see I'm not needing to put that blame on me. I was young and learning. My brain was not fully developed and it was a big first in my life of many firsts of relationships, excitement, attraction and all that. And so it was a big deal for me. As an 18 year old I've been able to finally come to terms with that and let the shame go and see it more realistically with a more level head. And thank goodness, time and therapy and all of that has helped me come to a much more reasonable stance on it. But also like I know it's wrong, I can see where I feel not at peace, but I feel like it is a chapter that I have put behind me and I don't really think about anymore. Time has given me perspective and I'm grateful for that and I'm grateful to be able to see things for what they are. That I was just a convenient young girl there at the right time at the right place.