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Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Something was wrong is intended for mature audiences and discusses topics that may be upsetting. Please consume the following episodes with care. This season discusses sexual, physical and psychological violence. For a full content warning, sources and resources for each episode, please visit the Episode Notes. Opinions shared by guests of the show are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Broken Cycle Media. The podcast and any linked materials should not be misconstrued as a substitution for legal or medical advice. We reached out to Professor Cato Buss and the University of Central Oklahoma for comment in response to allegations in the weeks prior to this episode's release. We have not received a response. Thank you so much for listening.
Survivor Amy
You think you know me. You don't know me well at all.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
You don't know anybody till you talk
Survivor Amy
to someone.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Previously on Something Was Wrong.
Survivor Amy
I had decided to study theater. Cato, who's the person that abused me, was the first person in the department that I met at all. I've never been in an environment where people adored a person more than the general population of students adored this person. Cato and I met winter of my senior year of high school at a recruiting event in North Texas. He was very paternal to me in a lot of ways. Whenever we first met, I was at his absolute beck and call. In college, later on, whenever shit kind of hit the fan, he relied on that loyalty a lot. The summer in between my freshman and sophomore year is when I really started to notice he is really focusing on Miranda. He cast me to Be the lead Eurydice. He would call me into his office once rehearsal had started. Almost every day before rehearsal, the hours before and after rehearsal looked very different after my confession of feelings towards him. I will not say that every single sexual experience I had with him was forced, but all of it carries the weight of the confusing aspects of being groomed and manipulated. I was one of the only people that she disclosed about this relationship to when it started. At the time, Morgan and I are in a play together. She had disclosed to me an experience she had where Cato had sexually harassed her on an away trip where alcohol was involved. I told Rihanna about what happened to me in 2015. She looked at me and she was like, he and Miranda are in a relationship. I told Rihanna, we have to report this. The next day I call my theater Ed advisor. That's when I got introduced to UCO's Title IX office. Funnily enough, I received the email of the Dean's decision the Friday that we were still at kcactf. Ultimately, she found him not responsible. I then decided that I wanted to file a Title IX complaint against him. I have the results that the university sent to me. Based on our conversation and your desired outcome, the university has implemented relative sanctions against the respondent and considers this matter closed and resolved. Within a month, my life was the same. His life was, as far as I know, pretty much the same. Nothing changed. That's when we agreed to do the lawsuit. She had told us that the media might pick it up. Because the media picks up things like this. I was not in any way prepared for it to be picked up so quickly. About a year after we filed the lawsuit, she let us know about a Supreme Court decision that came out that affected Title IX cases. And then I found a blog article talking about how one of UCO's Title IX lawsuits had been dismissed. The publication that released that the last were from uco, they didn't reach out to any of us. So I felt powerless and voiceless. We knew that the case would be dropped, but to actually find it out and not find it out directly from this attorney that had really made it seem like she cared was pretty awful.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
All right, it is Monday, February 23, 9.51am Pacific Time, and I'm here with Survivor Amy. We met through some random circumstances here. Amy, do you want to tell listeners how we became connected?
Survivor Amy
Yeah. My name is Amy and I've been a listener of the show since COVID Times, a regular listener. And I just happened to be catching up on podcasts last week it being something was wrong. I was listening to the current season, the beginning of it, talking about the survivors from University of Central Oklahoma, and the name Cato came in. And the name was familiar to me because I know Cato best.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Do you mind if I see if I can patch in our other Amy, abc, to see if she could talk to us for a second? Because she's the one who called me and told me about your submission. One sec, Amy. I wanted to pause really quick and get ABC on the line because abc, Amy B. Chesler, who is a co producer on the show, she's the one who came across your submission and she called me abc. Will you tell Amy what that was like for you?
Survivor Amy
Well, this whole season is very hard hitting, but when I heard the story, you know, about Cato, the very beginning of hearing about this, we've heard about all these places he's lived, and I was literally just waiting for some submission to come through, thinking there's no way we won't hear from someone in his past. I woke up really early one morning. I checked the inbox as usual because I've been trying to stay on top of things.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
And Amy's submission was sitting right there.
Survivor Amy
And the moment I read it, I felt extremely deeply for you.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
And I'm so sorry that you've had
Survivor Amy
to navigate everything that you've been forced to navigate.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
But it was a slice of validation,
Survivor Amy
I think potentially for the other survivors.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
And it was also gut wrenching and
Survivor Amy
eye opening to see just how long
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
he's been at this. I pray that this might open the school's eyes to like, this is a pattern of over 20 years we're talking about.
Survivor Amy
Presented with all this information in a linear way to still ignore it. There's just no excuse. I don't get it. I mean, I do because we see it every day, but I just feel so typical at this point and that's unfortunate.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
100% ABC. I know you got to hop off. You got a. What came next? Recording Girl is booked and busy.
Survivor Amy
We love you.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Well, I'm so glad Amy got to meet ABC too, because she works so hard on the show and she's been working so much on this season with me. I know she's extremely emotionally invested the way the whole team is, and she'll be happy that she got to meet you.
Survivor Amy
Likewise.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Going back to 1998, I believe it was around early springtime. Can you walk listeners through how you came to meet Cato?
Survivor Amy
Yeah. So when I was in high school, we did a musical every two years in the late 90s and 98. I was a senior in high school and it was the year for our musical to happen. Our theater teacher was out from a medical injury, I guess she sustained. So we had brought in some ringers to direct the musical. So there were three people, Cato and his partner, that did the blocking and the lines aspect of it, and then another gentleman that was brought in to direct the musical, parts of it with the pit and the singers and all of that. Cato and his partner were new to me, but not new to many of the other students who had worked with them in other capacities, playhouses and other productions. The vibe from the students was that they were very excited and really liked Cato and his partner. There was a lot of respect there and they were young and had a lot of great energy to them and it seemed like they were on the road to big things. So there was a lot of excitement to have these people directing us. So that was the first time I met Cato and his partner.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
To your understanding, this is the same partner that he currently had that the survivors from UCO referenced because they share a child.
Survivor Amy
Yes, that is absolutely true. At that point, I think that it was a two year old daughter, like a toddler age that they shared together. And though they share a child together, it was framed pretty early on in whatever conversations I had with Cato that they were not together really, they're not romantic and that they're just raising a child together.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
That old story. What was your impression of Cato? I know it's been a long time, it's been 28 years. But what do you recall about initially meeting him, if anything?
Survivor Amy
I recall that he had charisma, very smart and seems like someone you should listen to. I remember he had dark rimmed glasses that were really cool, kind of hipster glasses before hipsters became a thing. He just seemed like a friendly, funny guy who commanded the space.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
What was the musical that you were working on and had you done musicals prior to?
Survivor Amy
The musical that was chosen for that year was a musical called Chess. That is probably not a super popular musical, but people do know it and it has great music. Like One Night in Bangkok, that's my favorite song that's from that. Because it's like so inappropriate for high schools to be singing on the stage. I had done some musicals, but really I was into music. Like I was not a theater kid, I was a music kid. So I did all the band and orchestra and choir lessons, all that. I would say I'm not a great actor by any means, but I had a good enough voice that afforded me the opportunity to land one of the main roles in the musical.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
And do you think the fact that you were one of the leads in the musical gave Cato a bit more access to you than the average person?
Survivor Amy
Yeah, it definitely afforded more access to me. It was a small group that had the majority of the lines and songs in the musical, so there was certainly access and one on one or small coachings together.
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Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Other survivors have described a gradual increase in special attention. Did you experience that same type of behavior from Cato?
Survivor Amy
I did, even though it's been a long time and I can't recall the specific details. There would be musical practice after school and so I'm assuming that I probably saw him at the beginning of rehearsal or after rehearsal. We were having a conversation and maybe at that point we ended up going on drives. My best friend had said that she remembers me saying something about dropping him off at his house or going to his house, but I do not remember that. We'd have days where we focused on the music or other days that we did blocking. And so in those days there would be opportunities to have the one on one sessions or smaller groups for one. The one on one personal attention started to grow. Soon we were going on rides together around town and I would be the one driving. I'd pick him up because I think he was sharing a car with his partner. So I would pick him up and we would go on Drives around town. I don't know how many times that happened, but there were multiple drives. It would just be talking and conversation and probably some leg rubbing or hand holding one in particular. We ended up going to Dinosaur Hill, which is a hill in the middle of the town that I was from that kind of separated the east and west side of town. I just remember sitting on, I think like a cement dinosaur and having a conversation with him about who knows what. Those felt very meaningful, those rides. Like I don't know what we were talking about, but it felt important. And he did make me a mixtape of Leonard Cohen's songs, which I had a tape player in my car at the time and so that was probably on constant play. That made me feel like, oh wow, he really took the time to make this special tape. But then before I knew it, there was definitely a flirtatious dynamic that began. I know that I wasn't getting calls at home at the beginning. It was towards the end or after the production that I was getting calls. So it definitely escalated. I don't remember all of them, but I do remember probably one of the last calls I ever got from him. And it was the day of high school prom. I was getting ready for prom and he called. The phone was handed to me and I'm sure I was totally giddy and excited and talking about going to prom with my group of friends. And then he said that he wished he was taking me to prom, which made me feel gross even about that. I thought that was a really lame thing for a 28 year old to tell an 18 year old that they wanted to go to prom. Even I didn't really want to go to prom that bad.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
I think you had mentioned in the pre interview that your mom had answered the phone when he called.
Survivor Amy
Yeah, my mom answered the phone.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Just shows the boldness of him.
Survivor Amy
Yeah, it does show the boldness. And I'm sure that was certainly not the first time that he called. And it's a family line landline in those days so anyone could pick up.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Did your parents think anything of it or make any comments to you, if you recall?
Survivor Amy
I think that maybe with my mom there was probably some raised eyebrows, but we didn't ever have a conversation about it. And she never asked if anything was going on. It was a different time, I think, and it was probably not even crossing her mind that we were having this, I don't know, relationship. I'm sure I probably was not coming home and telling them about our secret drives around town. I was keeping things very Close to my chest and wasn't telling people just for, like, the messiness of it and also the dynamics of him and his partner. And even though he says they're not together, it always felt like I don't know what the deal is, but it's weird and it's not something I have seen before. So it was just different to me.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
What was your impression of Cato's partner? I know you mentioned that he used the same sort of story with you that he often used with the other survivors of, like, we're together, but it's really about our child. We're not really together together. But she also worked on the musical with you, which is unique to the other survivors. What was your experience of her?
Survivor Amy
I did not work with his partner nearly one on one as much as I did with Cato, and I don't remember why that was. But she was extremely professional, calm, friendly, really well liked by everyone. I don't have a bad thing to say about her. She was there, and I think they had a young child, so I feel like he was around more than she was, but she was great.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
How long do you think you guys were rehearsing for this musical together?
Survivor Amy
It was probably two to three months. I can't remember exactly when we started or when auditions happened and when it ended, but it was definitely the second half of the year. Things didn't really escalate sexually. Like, we were not having sex or doing any of that except one of the nights of our performances. I think it was our final night that everyone except my character was on stage for a number. So I was backstage. Cato found me and led me into the men's dressing room where he kissed me. It felt really exciting and exhilarating and just kind of crazy. And then I had to go on for one of the last numbers with the full cast. And trying to go in and focus when this other thing had just happened was kind of crazy emotionally that night.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Like, after the play, you go home and you're processing this. What's going through your mind in those moments?
Survivor Amy
I've talked to my best friend in the last week about this, trying to get her perspective from, like, how was I acting, what was going on? And what she kept saying is that her perspective was, is that I was really nervous and didn't know what to do. And I was really nervous about the fact of his partner and the child. That that was something that really bothered me. Even though I'd been told that there was nothing to be worrying about in her perspective. She saw that I was really worried about it. And from my perspective, it was like I was really excited and it felt very good to be singled out, to have special attention and that I had a kiss with someone that was older and that was really cool. I was like, probably on top of the world.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Performing is also so exhilarating, right? You work for months and then it's such an adrenaline rush, and it feels like it could have been even more confusing because these experiences that you've had with him are all tied to this exciting event as well, for sure.
Survivor Amy
Absolutely.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
What was your communication like after the musical wrapped?
Survivor Amy
If you recall, I was really fortunate in the timing of this because I was in my last semester of high school, and by this time I had things planned. I was going to go on a European trip with our band and orchestra, and I was going to come home and work for the summer and then go to Ohio for school. So I had the next things to work toward and be excited about and not just to mention, like, finals and the end of school and all that. So this relationship just kind of fizzled out. Nothing dramatic happened. There was no fight or no weird pressure or anything. It was just kind of like, I think we were both moving on in our lives. So how lucky for me that that is the way that it ended up, because I was able to kind of put things in a box and be able to, like, pull that box out when I wanted to feel excited and put it back and not really think much of it.
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Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Do you think you had any concept of power imbalances when you were 18 years old?
Survivor Amy
No. I mean I was thrilled just to have attention. Like it was just a different time. I mean it wasn't that long ago, but it just seemed like people wouldn't have maybe called that an abuse of power. I don't maybe they would have, but it feels like it would have been just much more of a slap on the wrist and not like what it would be today. And that this is truly an abuse of power and it's completely wrong.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
As you got older and thought back on the relationship with Kato, did you start to see the experience differently? Like for example, you mentioned at the time it felt really exciting. Did that with time, as you got older, change the way that you saw the experience?
Survivor Amy
Yeah, for sure. I would feel like the start of that was the comments about wanting to take me to prom. I feel like that was a thing that planted the seed of. Even though I could draw on this experience for years after, that is an exciting one. That seed of ick started to grow. And certainly when me too kind of blew up, the framing changed as society was more open to hearing about these stories and women were sharing. Even though my story, it's not super scandalous and it was relatively pg, I can see it for what it is now. And as someone who is a woman, as a mother, I can see I wouldn't want my friends or my daughter to be in that kind of situation. I would want them to feel empowered, to see through it for what it really was, which was a power imbalance. I think that there is more to be said about the long term impact because while I've talked about how exciting that time felt and how good it felt to be singled out, there was also the side of shame to it and secrecy. I talked about the anxiety and what my body was experiencing during that time with anxiety. And I didn't really know to put the words shame and anxiety and tie that to what my body was doing at the time. But certainly the shame lasted the longest compared to like the excitement. I felt a lot of shame because it felt like, oh, I'm just this girl who any person that gave her attention, she'll just melt into that. I felt a lot of shame about that and I felt the most shame about like, well, he told me that he's not with his partner. So I wanted to believe that, but it was like I always felt that was not quite right. And so that was a big source of shame for me as well. And that even grew more through the years. Now I recognize shame is not a helpful feeling to have. Now I can see I'm not needing to put that blame on me. I was young and learning. My brain was not fully developed and it was a big first in my life of many firsts of relationships, excitement, attraction and all that. And so it was a big deal for me. As an 18 year old I've been able to finally come to terms with that and let the shame go and see it more realistically with a more level head. And thank goodness, time and therapy and all of that has helped me come to a much more reasonable stance on it. But also like I know it's wrong, I can see where I feel not at peace, but I feel like it is a chapter that I have put behind me and I don't really think about anymore. Time has given me perspective and I'm grateful for that and I'm grateful to be able to see things for what they are. That I was just a convenient young girl there at the right time at the right place.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Yeah. Well that shame, we can sort of confront the shame as we have more information too.
Survivor Amy
Right.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
So as you got older and as you learn and as you hear about others experiences, that's how we become more informed. And certainly that's why young girls are often targeted by men in power because they know that they're more likely to have that power dynamic work in their favor. It is certainly one of the tactics for sure. So I'm so glad you highlighted that because I feel like the impact even from this one physical interaction that you had, look at the impact it had on you. And thank God he didn't have continued access to you. But based off of the other survivors experiences we could imagine had he continued to have contact to you, how it would have continued to escalate. Which is what's scary because we know he continued teaching for the next 28 years. It just makes me really sad when you hear about perpetrators who have been able to get access and continue this behavior for such a long time.
Survivor Amy
Yes. And not have consequences like real consequences.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Well, I cannot thank you enough for being willing to reach out to us and speak out. I know it means a lot to the survivors. We thank you so, so much. I'm so thankful for your listenership since COVID and I'm so thankful that you reached out and that we were able to connect so quickly.
Survivor Amy
Yeah. Thank you for all the work that you and ABC do to share your stories, but also to let other survivors speak out and give people a venue to do that. It's really important work.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Thank you so much. At the time of this episode's release, the University of Central Oklahoma's website still lists Cato Buss as an interim assistant dean and professor. Neither the university nor Bus responded to our request for comment, but the University's public record speaks for itself. As reported in a 2022 article by U Central, While Katobus was the subject of an ongoing Title IX investigation, UCO recommended him for promotion, the article states. As seen in the March 2022 Regional University System of Oklahoma Meeting Agenda, UCO recommended Cato Buss to be promoted to to a full time professor position at the university. This decision comes after many conversations about UCO's $20 million budget deficit and the potential for faculty layoffs. End quote. Despite multiple women coming forward over the course of several years, the University moved forward with promotion. For the survivors who spoke in Chapter two, that decision reinforces what they have already experienced. Not just grooming, not just retaliation, but institutional betrayal. And as research continues to show, their experience is sadly not uncommon. Thank you to Miranda, Olivia Morgan, Rihanna and Amy for sharing their experiences with us. Next time on Something Was Wrong, you'll meet Marissa, a college student whose night out ended in sexual assault and whose decision to report would stretch into years of investigations, court dates and Title IX meetings. A relentless system navigation with institutional confusion, athletic culture, a problematic detective, and a system that moved slowly while her life did not.
Survivor Amy
College is a time where people are experimenting and people are learning about themselves. I had gone to a lot of parties with student athletes, both of UVU and byu, where they were drinking and they were doing things that the LDS faith doesn't really condone. We had heard that these guys were
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
going over to SL's house.
Survivor Amy
We were mostly just trying to meet
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
new people, kind of hang out and
Survivor Amy
see where the night took us. There is so much going through my head I am not even considering still that something so horrible was gonna occur.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Thank you so much to each and every survivor and guest for sharing their experiences with us. And thank you for listening. Something Was Wrong is a Broken Cycle Media Production created and executively produced by Tiffany Reese. Thank you endlessly to our team Associate Producer Amy B. Chesler, Social Media Marketing Manager Lauren Barkman, Graphic artist Sarah Stewart, and audio engineers Becca Hai and Stephen Wack, Marissa and Travis at WME AudioBoom and our legal and security partners. Thank you so much to the incredibly talented Abayomi Lewis for this season's gorgeous cover of Glad Rag's original song youg Think youk from their album Wonder Under. Thank you to music producer Janice JP Pach Pacheco for their work on this cover, recorded at the Grill Studios in Emeryville, California. Find all artists socials linked in the episode notes to support and hear more. If you'd like to share your story with us, please head to SomethingWasWrong.com if you would like to help support the show, you can subscribe and listen ad free on Apple Podcasts. Purchase a sticker from our sticker shop@broken cyclemedia.com Share the podcast with a loved one or leave us a review. Want to stay up to date with us? Follow us on Instagram and Tik tok at Something Was Wrong Podcast. As always, thank you so much for listening. Until next time, stay safe. Friends.
Survivor Amy
Someone hey Sal.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Hank, what's going on?
Survivor Amy
We haven't worked a case in years. I just bought my car at Carvana in a wish. So easy. Too easy.
Podcast Host (Tiffany Reese)
Think something's up?
Survivor Amy
You tell me. They got thousands of options, found a great car at a great price, and it got delivered the next day. It sounds like Carvana just makes it easy to buy your car, Hank. Yeah, you're right. Case closed.
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Survivor Amy
Delivery fees may apply.
Podcast: Something Was Wrong
Host: Tiffany Reese (Broken Cycle Media)
Date: February 27, 2026
This episode of Something Was Wrong continues to explore the long-term effects of abuse, institutional betrayal, and silence at the University of Central Oklahoma (UCO) by focusing on the testimony of Survivor Amy. Through her candid conversation with host Tiffany Reese, Amy recounts her teenage experience being groomed by Cato Buss, a theater director, and how this early relationship shaped her sense of self, relationships, and understanding of power dynamics for decades following the abuse. The episode also reflects on the systemic failures that allowed Buss to remain in power at UCO, shining a light on how patterns of abuse persist when institutions protect perpetrators.
"It was also gut wrenching and eye opening to see just how long he's been at this."
— ABC (Amy B. Chesler), [08:11]
Meeting Cato: Amy met Cato during her senior year musical ("Chess") after her usual theater teacher was out due to injury. Cato, and his then-partner, entered as respected and charismatic directors.
Developing Access and 'Special' Attention:
Boundary Crossing & Grooming:
Immediate Aftermath:
Lack of Awareness of Power Imbalance:
Evolving Perspective and the Role of #MeToo:
Shame and Secrecy:
On Long-Term Impact:
"There is more to be said about the long term impact...while I've talked about how exciting that time felt, there was also the side of shame to it and secrecy." — Amy, [24:36]
On Institutional Betrayal:
"Despite multiple women coming forward over the course of several years, the University moved forward with promotion. For the survivors ... that decision reinforces what they have already experienced. Not just grooming, not just retaliation, but institutional betrayal."
— Tiffany Reese, [29:41]
On Perspective & Healing:
"Now I recognize shame is not a helpful feeling to have. Now I can see I’m not needing to put that blame on me... time and therapy and all of that has helped me come to a much more reasonable stance on it." — Amy, [24:36]
The tone throughout the episode is compassionate, reflective, and unflinching. Amy’s story is told with emotional nuance and honesty. Host Tiffany Reese and co-producer ABC offer support, validation, and contextual insight, emphasizing the importance of survivor voices and institutional accountability.
The episode offers a striking account of how abuse of power can manifest in subtle, gradual ways—and how the emotional “long-term impact” can follow survivors for decades. It exposes both individual and systemic failures, calling for greater awareness, institutional change, and collective support for survivors. Amy’s journey from secrecy and shame to perspective and self-forgiveness serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of telling these stories—both for individual healing and cultural change.
Next Episode Preview:
The episode teases the story of Marissa, a college student who reports sexual assault and must navigate a lengthy, arduous institutional process.