Spittin' Chiclets Episode 604: Featuring Andrew Santino

Summary

Spittin' Chiclets Episode 604: Featuring Andrew Santino

Date: December 11, 2025
Hosts: Ryan Whitney (Wit), Paul Bissonnette (Biz), Rear Admiral (RA), Mike Grinnell (G), Keith Yandle
Special Guest: Andrew Santino
—

Episode Overview

Main Theme:
This episode blends classic Spittin’ Chiclets irreverence and NHL analysis with a riotous, in-depth interview with comedian Andrew Santino. The crew covers the latest NHL news, recaps wild games, bickers about sandbagger golf matches, jokes about bodily functions, and dives into the comedy grind and podcast success with Santino. The chemistry is bold, sometimes crude, always lively.

—

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. NHL Winter Classic & League Storylines

• Winter Classic Road Show:

  • Excitement for NHL’s Winter Classic (Jan 2, 2026, Panthers vs. Rangers in Miami).
  • Discussion of “Road to the Winter Classic” TV coverage and key players’ injury updates. (02:23)
  • “He’s on the ice skating, which is huge. That’s bad news for the 31 other teams.” — Keith Yandle, on Matthew Tkachuk (02:40)

• Stanley Cup Odds Talk:

  • Rapid-fire guessing of contenders and dark horse teams, incredulity at Dallas’ and Carolina’s positions.
  • “Carolina’s gonna lose in the conference finals. We all know that.” — Wit (04:17)

• Ray Whitney ‘Lost Interview’ Saga:

  • The guys lament losing an epic 90-minute interview with ex-NHLer Ray Whitney and scheme to get him back.
  • “Text him right now.” — Biz, to Yandle (06:00)
  • “He is my family. He is my family.” — Yandle (06:03)

2. Classic Chiclets Banter: NHL News, Bed Mishaps & YouTube Fame

• Bed Wetting & Big Beds:
  • Candid and hilarious confessions about preferred sleeping habits and infamous bed-wetting stories.
  • “Those are usually my best sleeps, Biz.” — Yandle (10:27)
• YouTube Explodes:
  • Celebration of the podcast’s explosive YouTube growth post-sandbagger. (09:00)
• Sandbagger with Paige Spiranac:
  • Biz’s not-so-subtle gushing over Paige; jokes about butt plugs, dog collars, and playful self-deprecation.
  • “She could have put one on me and walked me around.” — Biz (10:43)
  • “It was Biz’s butt plug that really got me going.” — Wit (11:39)

—

3. Game and Player Analysis

• Islanders Resurgence:
  • Deep dive on the Islanders’ shocking form, young star defenseman, and revitalized offense.
  • “Bottom six – the way they forechecked… Wearing down Vegas. Very, very impressed.” — Biz (20:00)
• Goaltending Drama:
  • Analysis of recent shootout rules confusion after a collision forces a goalie change mid-shootout.
  • “How the fuck does that work?” — Biz (24:25)
• NHL’s Wild Late Goals Night:
  • Remarkable night with 4 games tied in the final 15 seconds, dissected at length.
  • “I’ve never seen anything like this…thank you very much.” — Wit, on a Bouchard turnover (32:17)

4. Comedic/Pop Culture Interludes

• Swaggy P (Hockey Influencer) Stories:
  • Spotlight on viral influencer with “the silkiest, nastiest mitts,” tales of his dominance in youth hockey. (37:29)
• Heated Rivalry TV Show:
  • Explosive discussion about a new, overtly homoerotic hockey TV series. The guys are equal parts shocked, amused, and supportive of its cultural impact. (62:28; 163:00)
  • “It makes Brokeback Mountain look like a Disney movie.” — RA (164:11)

—

[67:00] — Featured Interview: Andrew Santino

Introduction

• Santino, comedian/actor/golfer behind Bad Friends, sits in for classic “Locker Room” banter, career origin stories, and a roast of the Chiclets crew.

Comedy & Career Journey

• Early Days:
  • ASU party stories (“I went nowhere, dude.”), sleeping on a friend’s Lazy Boy.
• The Stand-Up Grind:
  • Comedy Store war stories; “You had to crush or you got no sets next week.”
  • “If you don’t believe in your joke, why would they laugh?” — Santino (77:40)
• Coaching & Camaraderie:
  • Talks shop about the ruthless support/demolition system among comics backstage.
  • “You walk up and they can’t wait to find something to shit on you for.” — Santino (79:02)
• Comparison to Athletes:
  • “With us, they think, ‘I’m funny, I could do that.’…You weren’t with me shooting in the gym.” (147:00)
  • On hard-earned success: “Anyone that is good did the grind.” (149:06)
• Comics’ Podcast Revolution:
  • “Joe Rogan pushed us all to do podcasts before anyone knew what it was.” (85:08)
  • On viral specials: “Gillis put his on YouTube. 49 million views. Unheard of.” (83:01)

Bad Friends Podcast, Live Show Stories

• Fan Interactivity:
  • “A girl would say, ‘I can queef on command’—and we gotta see it!” (88:18)
• On Bobby Lee:
  • “He sleeps till 3pm, plays video games, then podcasts and goes on dates. And the girls are all 8.5 and up!” (91:15)

Candid Industry and Personal Talk

• Bombing Onstage:
  • Horrific/funny story of bombing in front of 180 Japanese businessmen for Jim Beam.
  • “12 minutes felt like seven days.” (94:29)
• Comedy & Cancel Culture:
  • “Comics never changed. The crowd just got scared… It's all come back.” (118:28, 119:43)
• Mental Health, Family, Background:
  • On childhood with family struggles and how it fueled hustle and humor. (144:13)
• Athlete-Comic Parallels:
  • On natural talent: “Anyone good put in the work. If you make it too fast, it never lasts.” (149:34)

Memorable Quotes

• “You weren’t with me shooting in the gym.” — Santino (147:00)
• “You’ve got to put in 10,000 hours at shitty little clubs, constantly writing and move—and taking Ls. Unless someone’s in ‘the gym’ with you, they don’t get it.”
• [On Bobby Lee] “The game is: no effort. The game is: do you want to hang out?” — Santino (92:27)
• “My favorite was when we got fans onstage and a girl in Denver could queef to the beat.” (88:35)

[155:19] Santino’s Dream Guest

• “We tried for Eddie Murphy multiple times. I’d kill to have him.”
• Wild DMs from Antonio Brown; musings about legendary and totally unhinged guest wishes.

—

[163:00] — RA’s World: “Heated Rivalry” & More

• RA reviews the “Heated Rivalry” TV series (“makes Brokeback look like a Disney movie”) and lauds Montreal Canadiens for playing its trailer on the jumbotron for Pride Night.
• “I wish I had that Russian’s ass. I left my ass in the womb.” — RA (164:11)
• Audience support for LGBTQ representation in hockey, and how the show creates new gay/queer hockey fans.

—

[170:10 onward] — Listener Q&A & Classic Chiclets

• Favorite Sporting Events Attended:
  • RA runs down absurdly epic list: World Series, “Snow Bowl,” Super Bowls, “Fog Bowl,” Stanley Cup wins.
• Chiclets Movie Cast:
  • RA gives casting choices for Chiclets hosts (e.g., Johnny Bernthal as Biz).
• Classic Recos:
  • “Freaks and Geeks” (one season, Judd Apatow), beloved by G (who watched it in "Watching TV 101" at Plymouth State).
• NHL records discussions:
  • The unbreakable status of Ovi’s goal chase, Tiger Williams’ penalty minutes, Glenn Hall’s consecutive games. (188:36, 193:31)

—

Notable Quotes & Funny Exchanges (by timestamp):

• “I take as much as I can, because I get Bri starfish. So I’m on like 8% of this enormous bed we have.” — Wit (07:02)
• “If you see the $9.99 large cheese pizza at Tony’s Place, things are not going well. Funny shirts for Elio!” — Wit (14:15)
• “Barzal looks a lot happier. They were putting a governor on him a little bit offensively—and now Patrick’s like, ‘Go boys.’” — Biz (20:00)
• “Swaggy P as an influencer…he’d still be playing if he was three inches bigger.” — Yandle (37:50)
• “If I could go to a Rugby Sevens World Championship with the boys, I would.” — Biz (202:45)

—

Interview with Andrew Santino: Core Takeaways

• Comedy’s grind mirrors hockey’s: “The real ones always put in the hours, took the Ls, wanted to bomb and come back.”
• Podcasting and socials shifted success: “Joe Rogan made it mandatory. YouTube can launch your career overnight.”
• Standup is brutal, but comics shape each other: “Backstage is like the Mafia, everyone’s gunning for each other’s egos—but the best want strong openers and challenge.”
• Mental health and childhood shape the best: “Most of my friends had dark upbringings.”
• On Bobby Lee: “He’s a genius. Sleeps all day, video games, always brings 8.5+ girls on the same date. The game is: no game.”

—

Chiclets Segments: NHL & Beyond

• Winter Classic & New TV: Preview of “Heated Rivalry” and “Road to the Winter Classic.”
• YouTube Numbers: Huge sandbagger drops; celebration and inside-editor jokes.
• Locker room banter: Regular talk of bathroom mishaps, hydration, and sandbagger trash talk.
• Listener questions: From sporting event memories to recasting Chiclets as a movie.

—

Useful Timestamps

• NHL Odds & Team Futures: 03:10 – 04:59
• Bed Wetting Banter: 06:56 – 10:43
• YouTube Milestone: 08:44—10:09
• Islanders/League Analysis: 15:12—21:55
• OT Goalie Drama: 23:18—25:53
• McDavid/McKinnon/Overtime Chat: 31:24–36:28
• Santino Interview Segment: 66:28—155:00
• Heated Rivalry TV Review: 162:32—166:54
• Fan Q&A/Chiclets Movie: 196:30—199:03
• Classic TV Pick – Freaks & Geeks: 203:42

—

Final Takeaways

Spittin’ Chiclets 604 is the quintessential mix: unfiltered hockey clubhouse, pop-culture sendups, team chemistry, bodily humor, and a showcase interview with a major comedy star. From updates on NHL shakeups to Netflix’s new “Heated Rivalry,” to Andrew Santino’s stories about ASU, the Comedy Store, and collaboration with Bobby Lee, the ep offers laughs, unique insider perspectives, and serious respect for anyone who grinds to the top.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Me and Ryan have been officially welcomed to the jungle that is Barstool sports.

[C]

I brought it towards the Coyotes and I asked him if it was okay if I joined the Spit Chicklets podcast full time.

[D]

Ryan Whitney's got a pink Whitney out there now.

[B]

Sandbagger. Get that on camera.

[D]

Keith Yandel, the song commander.

Is a full time member. Marley just got an assist from Chris Beat.

[E]

Whoa, we're buzzing right now.

[D]

What is up folks? Welcome to episode 604 of the Spit and Chicklets broadcast presented by Discover Winter Classics. Gonna be a special one because of Discover. This show is sponsored by Discover, the official credit card of the National Hockey League. No matter if your team wins or loses, Discover is there for you with cash back on all your post game purchases. With the Discover it card, you can earn cash back on every purchase. So celebratory wings just got easy. Even better. Learn more discover.com Credit card cash back on team gear, jerseys, hats, cash back on tickets, cash back on french fries, etc. Etc. The Discover NHL Winter Classic, like I mentioned, is taking place January 2, 2026 in Miami Panthers versus the Rangers. Tune into TNT. Get cash back on every Purchase the Discover it card. Learn [e-mail] credit card I actually saw they're doing a.

I saw they're doing a kind of a. What was the old school name of the show of the following of the 24 7? 247 was the old one. So they're doing what Road to the Winter Classic. Looking forward to seeing that one. I saw it'll cover Matthew. Matthew seems like he's not that far away.

[E]

Keith, from what I heard, he's on the ice skating, which is huge. I think they're on a little bit of a road trip right now out west the. The Cats. But I'm pretty sure I heard that he's on the ice skating, which is. That's bad news for everybody else. That's bad news for the 31 other teams.

[D]

That's scary. That's scary. And I was just on a show, a house call with Rico and Jerry where we're just. I. I gave a td. TD score this week for anyone. I gave K. Sean Booty for the New England Patriots.

[E]

You love that booty.

[D]

You know I love the booty. And randomly they asked me NHL and let me try to find it here. I said they were looking for futures and it was kind of. I was like, oh, I got to check that out. So can you guys list give me your. What you think of the top eight in terms of favorite?

[C]

Colorado.

[D]

Yep.

[E]

Colorado.

[C]

I bet you they still have.

[A]

They.

[C]

I always guess Edmonton or Carolina on the second slot.

[D]

Carolina second. I know, it's like, guys, Dallas three. You're going to lose in the conference finals again. Dallas 3. Surprising. Surprising Dallas. Dallas sits in the sixth spot right now.

[C]

Vegas 3.

[D]

No, I was shocked at the third one.

[E]

Florida.

[D]

Tampa Bay Lightning.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Wow.

[D]

After them. Florida Panthers.

Vegas Golden Knights. Dallas Stars. Edmonton Oilers. So it goes. Colorado's plus 320 makes sense. Carolina's plus 700. Tampa Bay's plus 800. Florida's plus 8. 50. 50. Vegas is plus 900. Dallas is 10 to 1 and the Oilers are 12 to 1. After that, it's the Capitals at 18 to 1. So it kind of makes it seem like those seven are, you know, much bigger than. I mean, I think it's a pretty big jump. 12 from 12 to 1 to 18 to 1. But yeah, Carolinas, they're going to lose in the conference finals. We all know that. And, and I think Dallas being 10 to 1 is based on that. They'd have to play Colorado in the second round. Right. If they're Pacific, I think that they're higher, but I was interested to see that. Yeah, Biz, you called it. They always have car. I think I thought you were going to say Carolina. So they're Carolina.

[E]

They. They just had their. What was it, 20 year anniversary. All the guys in town. So the things might be switching a little bit. You get the wizard back in the building.

[D]

The old 20 years.

[E]

Yeah, I get every 20 years, you never know.

[C]

Yeah, I heard they had cabbage rolls for the buffet. That was nice of them.

[E]

And diapers.

[C]

Some old memories from, from Ray Whitney, by the way. I think we've talked about this before. We did like an 80 to 90 minute interview with Ray Whitney and it somehow ended up getting lost. And I don't know if, if we're going to be able to get him back on. I don't know if he's pissed because he's like, I gave you 90 minutes of our time.

[D]

But I swear to God, Biz, I respect him for being like, no, no, I know.

[E]

So when he won't come back, he'll come back on.

[D]

Sometimes you better tip your cap and be like, I get it, I get it, Ray, I get it.

[C]

The only thing that would save us is the fact that Merls Yan's wasn't on at the time, but Merls was. And Merls was awesome as, as a filling in that one too. Yeah, yeah. But like, that one in particular, I remember him striking up like two or three stories where I had my jaw on the floor. And, and maybe because Ray loves you so much that if you reached out Yan's, we'd be able to get him back.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

So I'm gonna text him right now.

[D]

Yeah, you guys go way back.

[C]

Yeah, text him right now.

[D]

He is my family. He is my family.

[E]

Yeah, I remember he always used to skate by you it and go, what up, cuz?

[D]

What up, cuz?

[C]

Tell him that we, we fire and stoned the person who lost it as part of our team and we'd love to have you back on. And we were talking about it on the podcast. Cause I don't know if he's an everyday listener.

[D]

So, Biz, behind you is your bed. I know you're in Atlanta. Got to do a couple good games last night.

[C]

Unreal.

[D]

You're just. When you have that big old bed, you just sleep one side, never in the middle.

[C]

No, I sleep in the middle.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah, it just looks like it. I always get off on, on that side of the bed, but I know.

[D]

You get off in bed.

[C]

What's that?

[E]

Wait, you sleep right in the middle of the bed?

[C]

Yeah. Like, yeah, yeah.

[D]

I think as I asked that, I realized maybe that is a little different. Maybe most people on a big bed just pick a side.

[C]

No, I, I tend to lean more towards the middle. Like, I might be like a foot, like not center, but I don't know.

[D]

I, I, I take as much as I can because I get Bri Starfishes So I'm on like 8% of this enormous bed we have when we.

[C]

That's like a female thing.

[D]

Spongebob.

[C]

That's a female thing. They could be 42 and weigh 80 pounds, and they're taking up 75% of.

[E]

The B. I take up this much room.

That's how I thing is, though, is.

[C]

Actually start picking aside even when I'm sleeping by myself. Because if I do hose the bed, at least I can go on the other half as opposed to, like, oh, no, I'm sleeping my gans, where I only get like a foot and a half of the bed.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

So. Because, you know, when I go, it's.

[E]

It's go time.

[C]

It's about 17 liters. I got more piss in my bladder than my. My diesel truck has.

[D]

You haven't peed the bed in a while, though, right?

[E]

Yeah, two months.

[C]

No, I think the last time I hosed the bed was at Internet invitational. Okay.

[D]

That's the last time we talked about it. All right.

[C]

Yeah. I think it was the time zone change in the humidity that. That did it. But we don't need to get into that.

[D]

And you had the one day I was out there with you. I think you had 27 waters.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Like, it was like, even like somebody who's constantly talking about hydration, they would have been like, dude, enough.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, that's because I was hanging out with the Duke that day, and I was smoking his LA crack, and I was just like, I need this. I need.

[D]

I.

[C]

If I didn't. If I didn't drink all that water, I wouldn't have made it out of the Ozark. So now, speaking of that, we got to promote. Since we're talking about golf, we do have the Duke coming up for a sandbagger, but there's another one that's dropping today, and that's on the Spit and Chicklets YouTube channel. 430,000 subscribers.

[D]

We've gotten two grand. Was it 28? At the end of.

[C]

It was like 26 or 27. And then all of a sudden with the. The chicklets used and everything else, like the. The. The ball hockey vlog, like, everything that we dropped, all of a sudden, it just skyrocketed.

[F]

I do have some big news biz. In the past five minutes, we got to 4.

[A]

31.

[D]

Okay, okay, okay. I really, really love that. I thought there was going to be a trade or something announced, but I think Biz would rather that than finding for me.

[E]

He both said the same thing.

[C]

Did he say that?

[E]

He said the Exact same thing.

[D]

Whoa. Yeah. We're on the same wavelength right now, buddy.

[E]

That's a good thing. Oh, dude, every 10 people, it goes up on YouTube. Just interrupt and come in and tell us.

[D]

Yeah. And if you watch this, this sandbagger with Paige, I hope everyone does. Very entertaining. You'll see. Biz and I were not on the same wavelength for this.

[C]

I actually. You guys were fucking brutal. And one of you guys had something taken out of the video. Whatever, that's ok. But for the amount that you guys pile on and shut on shit on me, I feel like you guys should have to bear some of it, too.

[D]

But I'll give you a chat. Listen, what was taken out of the video, if that was something where one of us was made fun of by you, it never would have come out right. Ever. So that's, like, not a great analogy. Do you know what I'm saying?

[C]

Sure.

[D]

No, I'm not. I'm just gonna take back my. I take back the same thing I said that you just said I would.

[C]

That could have been one of the worst analogies I've ever heard.

[E]

It was a great man. I hope you pee the bed tonight.

[C]

It's. So do I. Those are my. Usually my best sleeps. That means I hit my REM cycle, but it's an incredible bagger down to the wire. Page was an incredible partner. She calmed me down, helped me with my swing. She's an incredible coach. I love her.

I should have proposed. I should have brought the ring. I didn't. I was a pussy. But Simp Nasty is out in full force in this one, that's for sure. The only thing I didn't have on that day was a dog collar. But she could have put one on me and walked me around and I would have thrown it on. I would have been like R.A. at the Stanley cup finals with that diamond encrusted dog collar if she wanted it on my neck. So, Paige, I love you. I don't know if you love me back, but that's all I got to say.

[D]

You had a butt plug in for the whole match, though.

[C]

That's true. I'm not discussing that.

[D]

Guys.

[E]

Is that the remote thing that she had?

[C]

You guys. You guys are on the same wavelength now, eh? You're a bunch of fucking bullies.

[E]

But you guys were a really good team, though.

[C]

We were. It was incredible. And so were you guys. And I had a blast. And I hope we run it and I hope everybody.

[D]

We have to. And I think people are going to like this one. You're Nuts. You're nuts. It's just ridiculous. A ridiculous four hours on the golf course. I'll never forget it. Get your mind out of the gutter, folks. It was Biz's butt plug that really got me going the whole time. You mentioned Merle's biz.

[C]

Yes.

[D]

He was in. He was in St. Louis last night, and I saw that you tweeted. Now, it went over. Elio was there. That is a chasing goals trip that they do. They've done several of these. I believe they went to Detroit. They might have gone to Columbus. That's just random. A chasing goals trip. Icecon, which is what people have, you know, become aware of, that that is the true cult of the ice people, that they're 02. That is not a win. I saw you tweet out. Congrats. They got it done. He has not won icecon yet. Icecon, I believe, is in Chicago, end of March or early April. I've been told. I will never miss an icecon. I. I hope I'm not giving that away. I don't. I don't. I think that's. That's finalized, but they. They haven't won an icecon. We haven't won an icecon. I should say so. We got to get one of those. But congrats. Merle's and Elio did hit that over, and I said, jesus, guys, you went to watch the Blues.

[E]

They had Missouri, right?

[D]

Yes, yes. The show me State just. DraftKings just went live.

[C]

What classifies an IPCON? Does Dave have to be in attendance?

[D]

I think it's like there's more that goes into it than just a chasing goal strip. There's merch given out to everyone. There's an enormous meet and greet the night before. There's a. It's just a more scaled up version of chasing goals is icecon.

[C]

Okay. That's when, like, the. The. The. The one kid from the check comes like they're. Yeah, they have some insane followers.

[D]

Yeah, it's a cult. And. And there is now a kid who was there last year, smothered, just as dry as a skunk. Annoying, crippled, buckled. Any word you want to say? He takes the under, he shows up, and in Elio's face, he bets the Under. And he was there again last night, so they got to stuff it in his face. Luckily, he even had a shirt. I believe five and a half goals equals nine. $9.99 pizzas, because Elio owns Tony's place. I believe it's West Roxbury or Hyde Park. And when he goes on losing streaks, the pizzas become cheaper. And so that's what. That guy made a shirt about it. But he was the real loser.

[E]

He owns that pizza place that. Oh, yeah, Bomb.

[D]

Awesome.

[C]

Yeah, it's unbelievable. What's the name of it again? Tony's.

[E]

Right.

[D]

Tony's Place.

[C]

Now he makes them cheaper so they sell more of them to recoup his losses.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[D]

So if you see the 999 large cheese pizza at Tony's place, things are not going well. Funny shirts for Elio.

[E]

Funny.

[C]

Unreal.

[D]

Yeah, it was a funny shirt, actually. I'll give the guy credit. If he was as drunk as last time, though, I. I mean, I. I.

[C]

Saw HQ Spider getting in his face. That's the only clip that. That's what I finally, like, came to realize. Like, oh, they have like a heckler. You know, you're. You know, you're big time Merls if you got a heckler.

[D]

Yeah. When the haters come out, you know you've made it. Yeah, they don't. People don't boo nobody's face. You ever heard that saying?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Well, buddy, see them sitting in the stands watching morning skate?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

I was fucking.

[D]

Merle's is funny. Merle's parlay included a Jake Neighbors goal, which I. I didn't mind at all. The over and then Oscar Sundquist to get one. And I was like, what is this? He's like. He plays in the power play and he's out there in the last minute. Oh, during the last minute.

[E]

We.

[D]

When they're trying to protect the lead, like the Blues have been trying to protect so many leads late. I can't stop burping.

[C]

He also had a Zaka anytime goal, whether it was regulation or overtime.

[D]

He took that live. I think he took that late in the second period.

[C]

And it was big. It was big. It was a nice pop for him. I think he ended up making about like 3,500 bucks. So.

[E]

Nice.

[C]

I don't know if. As far as overs are concerned, I don't know if you guys caught the TNT games last night. Unbelievable. I mean, the first one. Vegas. The Islanders are. Must watch hockey now.

[D]

Dude, it's awesome. You see the clip I just retweeted? I think it's Dimitri Filipovich of Shaffer last night.

[C]

Oh, yeah, Yeah. I was watching it live in the flesh. He was doing a little shake and bake special at the line. He's. He's essentially. He's got that Lane Hudson, QUINN HUGHES, KALE McCARR like maybe, like maybe not as, as high end doing it as often but on the blue line when he's walking the line, like he shimmy shakes and shakes and bakes and. And he makes guys miss. He's a one man show out there.

[D]

And Keith, you'll, you'll know what I'm saying. As a defenseman, like holding it at the blue line with somebody coming at you like. Yeah, everyone hopes to give that head fake and that quick, you know, stutter step but like the balls it takes to do it. He turned 18 like a day before the season started. Like I, I can't believe what I'm watching with him and the skating biz. You, you're right. Mar is so smooth and just, it's just so fluid. And Lane Hudson is kind of herky jerky, but so quick and dynamic. He's kind of combination of them both skating. He has those quick little moments but he also, once the stride gets going, it's like, okay, he's gliding past people who are very fast and in the NHL for a reason. Just incredible.

[E]

Yeah. I think the little moves that he makes on the blue line won't look as like fluid as maybe a Makara or Hudson just because he's taller and it. But he, but he, he gets it done and it gets done in a perfect way. I was wondering that wit like when we were coming up, if you ever turn the puck over at the blue light.

[D]

A.

[E]

There was maybe two guys. I think Carlson was kind of the first one that was really doing it all the time and. But it, it was at a point where it was. You couldn't do that. It wasn't allowed. But nowadays, like if you have the skill work, it just seems like the coaches are like, hey dude, let it fly at the blue line. Because they probably just trust that he can, he can catch. Catch whoever. Unless he blows a wheel and falls. He can catch whoever. If, if he does lose the puck at the blue, he'll pit them up.

[C]

That's a great point, Yance. I don't like even like Duncan Keith like I don't know if I remember.

[D]

That wasn't his game. That wasn't his game.

[C]

But still he had that. He was kind of had that Lane Hudson where he probably could have. But it just like I'm sure. Q. I mean he won't let you throw backhand passes in your own head.

[D]

No.

[C]

I would imagine he doesn't want you trying to shake and bake at the ozone line when your last guy back. But who Would you say was the innovator of that? Was it Makar or. You guys talked about Carlson doing it. Like, who was the first guy to. Was Zubov doing that?

[D]

I was just gonna say Zubov maybe, but I think he was more give and go, even go, give and go. Give, go and go. Yeah, Carlson was so, so nasty at just head up and making moves up top. And I, I don't mean to sound like old boomer witnesses, but I hope these young guys appreciate the fact that they are allowed to. Basically, if you're that top level player, you're allowed to try anything you want. Now I think that that probably makes the game. Not probably. It makes the game way more enjoyable to watch as a fan with these guys trying moves and you're seeing things pulled off. But before, I don't think it was that common where you were given the green light. Like, hey, show your skill off. Like, do what's gotten you here at such a young age when you. Whereas before it was kind of like, hey, dude, that worked. Don't try it again. Forget like if it didn't work, remember.

[E]

And I remember working with you in the summertimes. Remember how Lidstrom used to get the pucket like the wall and then just walk in. But he would walk with like, you know, his back and just fake shot, fake shot and then maybe push it. He wasn't dancing around like these guys do now. So what they're doing is different. It's. It's next level. And I love watching it.

[C]

It's like, how do I.

[D]

You did it. B.

[C]

It's like Dana White in the poke or in the blackj. That type of.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Five hundred thousand dollar hands. Like that's the type of. Like that's the alligator blood that they're playing with. And I don't know what you were going to say with. But just to quickly put the Islanders into perspective right now, they lose Paul, Mary, they lose Rome. Is it Romanov? How do you pronounce his name? Romanov.

[D]

I've always said Romanov. I think Romanov. It's not Romanov. I think you said it right. Romanov.

[C]

Romanov. So they lose those two guys. Couple big key pieces and in the last five games they beat the Tampa Bay Lightning twice. They've beaten the Colorado Avalanche handedly and then they ended up beating the Vegas Golden Knights last night. And the only other loss that they sustained were to the back, back to back Stanley cup champs. I think they were playing in a back to back. They were in South Florida they lost four. One. So they go for the last five and then that. Those were the. That was their competition. So I mean stick taps. And it's not just the top end guys like Bo Horvat. I know like we were in the tech team text thread last night. You're like, ah, he's probably on the outside looking in. You'd be very shocked if he made the Olympic team. 19 goals, man. Like, he's well on pace to set a career high. So he's buzzing. You could just tell Barzell looks a lot happier where I feel like they were putting a bit of a, you know, they were putting the. The. What do you call the governor on them a little bit offensively where I feel like Patrick was just like, hey, go boys. Play the way that you want to play, but just be responsible defensively. Work your fucking cocks off. And the other thing too is their bottom two lines, man. That, that Cal Richie because they have Horvat and Barzell is the one too. It frees him up a little bit. I think he's averaging like just over 12 minutes of ice time. That Holstrom looked incredible last night. And basically that bottom six, the way they forechecked, the way that they were cycling the puck and chewing up clock and wearing down Vegas, very, very impressed by the way that they played. And, and of course Sorokin and. And the boys brought up a good point on the panel. Like they, they can run and gun a little bit more and exchange chances knowing that you got a guy back there who year over year, I think he's sub 2.2.5 goals against average and well into the.900 save percentage. So he's. He's all world since he came in. And this is probably one of the the biggest surprises in the league this year going from where the draft was to now. I don't think anybody expected this. And especially how rocking that building in for how boring it's been the last.

[D]

The building looks very alive and unreal. We said it earlier that you get the first overall pick and it happens to be what looks like a generational player. It changes the entire course of the franchise. And it's happened and they did a great job last year. Like that Brock Nelson trade was hard to move. That Richie kid's going to be awesome. And Brock Nelson's really kind of found his game. Remember, it was a slow start for him. He walked Roman Yosi in the first minute of the game last night.

[A]

Like you don't see.

[D]

You don't see Yosi get beat like that. That was. That was phenomenal. The. I was going to say quickly, maybe Phil Housley did it. I don't remember his game, but the amount of points he was getting, maybe he was dancing on the blue line a little bit like we're talking about. I just don't remember. I don't remember that. Well, yeah, Islanders a lot of fun. I did appreciate last night. Lundqist on the broadcast, he.

[E]

It's hard to do.

[D]

He kind of gave it to Sorokin a little bit on the Hannifin goal and the Marner goal. The rebound control wasn't necessarily great.

[C]

Yeah, the. The pop. I don't know if they had the scouting report out on them. Cause it seems like they were doing that quite a bit where they were just trying to lay a soft one in on that far side pad for the big, juicy rebound. But nonetheless, great games between the first and the second one. Each of them went to a shootout. The bizarre thing. And we also talked about this. I think we were texting about this morning, and you were like, wait a minute.

[D]

So that was crazy.

[C]

Yeah. Wedgwood ends up getting ran into by Forsberg on a penalty shot. He, like, caught a rut and, like, barrels him over. And it was a. It looked like a nasty collision. But Wedgwood was obviously all right after he shook it off. So Nashville gets one more shooter in which Wedgwood stops. Now Colorado is trying to go down to the other end to score in order to, like, extend the shootout. Because at that point, Nashville's up by one. And then all of a sudden, the refs are like, whoa, whoa, whoa. They're getting the call. The spotter. The spotter's like, no, Wedgwood has to come out of the net. You got to put Blackwood in where even Wedgwood's like, what the fuck is he talking about? Like, I got ran over. I shook it off, and I'm ready to go. I just made a goddamn save. And now you're going to put Blackwood in cold to potentially make more if this thing keeps going and he was.

[E]

Already at the tin roof.

[C]

Exactly. Exactly. And if you're Wedgwood, like, I don't know how this works. Like, if they end up tying it on that next shot and then Blackwood makes a save and then they go down and win it does all of a sudden Blackwood get the W?

[D]

That's a great question.

[C]

How the fuck does that work? So Wedgwood's like, no, I worked my off all game. I'm not fucking don't coming out.

[D]

I have, like, I have a bonus in my contract for wins or something. Like what? I don't even think you can have those anymore. Good call.

[C]

If you're over 40, I think you can.

[D]

Or I can't believe. I can't believe the spotter, like, if. If Forsberg runs into him the way he did your job, whatever, you take him out, he literally, you. You let him go. Another shooter. Like, at that point, you have to be like, okay, I missed my spot. No pun intended. He's staying in. Like, you can't then pull him. And if you witness that and saw the Forsberg collision, what took you long enough where another guy got to shoot before he comes out. That Lyles, who's very. A mild mannered guy, John Michael Lyles, he's like, what the fuck is going on on Twitter? He's like, I don't understand this, and I don't think anyone else did too. So, I mean, a goalie to come into a game called is one thing. To come into a shootout, that's got to be way harder, right? Like, you just have somebody with skill coming down on a breakaway.

[E]

Remember Mike Morrison used to do it for. When I was in Phoenix, who was the goalie? And then Mike Morrison would come in just for the shootouts.

[C]

Oh, they. Yeah, I remember that.

[E]

They did it in Edmonton, too, I believe.

[C]

Yeah, one guy was. The one guy they had was brutal at shootouts and he was okay coming out.

[E]

They would just come in. Yeah.

[D]

Really? Yeah.

[A]

But that's gonna be.

[D]

Maybe a goalie would tell you it's actually easier to do a breakaway than come into like 5 on 5 or something. I don't know.

[E]

I don't know. Your groins, like, you're automatically gonna have to go down and I don't know. That'd be you. We'd have to ask a goalie.

[D]

What was incredible about Tuesday night was that we had an NHL record in which 4 games were tied up with less than 15 seconds to go. I believe the prior record was 3 and G. Grab this stat. Great work here. That this year's NHL season has featured 372 close contests. Now, what makes a close contest is a one goal margin or two plus with an empty net goal, which is the most at this stage of a season in league history. Ahead of last year, that was 356. So you're getting some great games. You're getting a lot of action now. I think Pittsburgh Penguins fans might be more disgusted with last night's ending than anything. I've ever seen. There is a screenshot of somebody on the Anaheim Ducks with the puck in their own zone in front of their own goalie with 10 seconds left. Shorthanded, and they fucking game now. Brian Rust, incredible hockey player Chris Latang, possible Hall of Famer. That was maybe the most pathetic defense I've ever seen in my life before. Superstar rookie Beckett Senake ties the thing up and they go on to lose an ot. The Penguins shoot a little tire pump.

[C]

Before we go get a little bit negative on the Penguins for that one. Didn't Seni also set a record?

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

I believe Sen right now is like one of the youngest players to hit 26 points as a. As a teen. Help me out here, G. Is it.

[D]

Not in the outline teenager in Ducks history to reach 25 points?

[C]

Wow. That's what it is. Okay, well, still good, because, I mean, they've had Corey Perry, they had Ryan Getlov. Like, there is a very.

[E]

I wonder if those guys were in the minors that lockout year, though, when they were 19.

[C]

Okay, fair enough, Fair enough.

[E]

But no, no, it's still. It's still amazing. Like, to break a record, anything is amazing.

[C]

So going back to the play itself, you're up a goal. Okay, so Anaheim takes a penalty, I believe with about 20 seconds left, there's a face off in the offensive zone. Okay, I. Carlson's been unreal this year, and so has Latang. Are. Are those the two guys you want out there in that situation? Are those your like. Like, I would basically send out my penalty kill unit.

[D]

Ryan Shea has been there, like last minute, up a goal guy this year. One of them at least. So. At least he get him out there.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

You're saying. Why are you two power play guys out there?

[C]

Yeah, and. And on top of that, too, like, you see when Anaheim takes control of the puck in their own end, like Rust, Latanger and Carlson, and I know they stretched one or two guys, but they're backed up like five, 10ft already inside their zone, so there's no gap whatsoever. So it was just horrible coverage. They give up the line, Sen is able to gain all that speed. He ends up walking the tang one on one. And the worst possible bounce going off, you see how it hit Carlson's glove and ended up going between. She loves legs, so I don't know, I just thought that they handed that one over. And if you're Pittsburgh, you can't afford to give away that point. That's just. That's the one at the End of the year, when you miss by a point or two, where you look back and you're like, motherfucker.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

No, that, that if they miss by. By one point. Oh, I don't think that.

[E]

I don't think there's anything wrong with having those two guys out there. Like. Like having. If they had five forwards, like the Leafs dude, then you'd be like, okay, what are we doing? But I mean, those guys have played so many big NHL games that played power play, penalty killed, five on five. It shouldn't have happened.

[C]

Yeah. Okay, so. But I mean, you go to Tampa and like this. Discussions happen. Like, if you go to the last minute of the game, it's not usually headman on the ice. Like, if you go back to when they were winning their championships, it was Ryan McDonough out there. So I think that you have to. You have to have those types of guys that you're like, we're not giving up a goal type shit. Maybe rather than like Latang Carlson. And that's not taking anything away from him. But I don't think that either of those guys are known for their shutdown defense. That's just not what they're known for.

[E]

And they wouldn't be upset if they weren't out there either from. Sure. Like you just happen to get the win.

[C]

They probably already played 24 minutes each. So I don't know, put it this way.

[D]

When I was on Pittsburgh and Gaunchar and I were running the power, or he was running the power, but we were on the first power play, if we were up a goal at the end of the game, even on the power play, and they said Whitney Gonchar. I would have been like, what?

[C]

Not a chance.

[E]

Scuds would be like, hey, sit this one down.

[D]

Scuds and Orpic are like, no, no, no, no. I don't think so. This is not happening. But the, the late game heroics were awesome. As we mentioned, seneca score with 11 seconds left. Dorothy have scored with 14 seconds left to tie it up. Vegas Islanders McDavid. Oh my God. Edmonton. And Bouchard. Holy. McDavid scored with a second left and Kale McCarr scored with eight seconds left to tie it up in the Nashville Colorado game. So pretty sick, dude, that you get those type of endings on a pretty good slate of games. But to get into Edmonton real quick.

The start of the game, Buffalo played the night before they got waxed by Calgary. Now sometimes there is something to be said that the team that is playing on a back to Back with not crazy travel by any means. They almost have a leg up, right? Like sometimes that's the case where they're moving their feet and they're going. And they played the night before and it just comes more natural at the beginning. But still not three nothing down. And in two of the goals, the first goal. And by the way, Josh D. Like that trade. Buffalo won that trade.

[E]

Million percent.

[D]

Josh D looks phenomenal. He has 11 goals now. I think how many does. What's his name?

[C]

I think he just hit 10, didn't he? He just hit the double digies and.

[D]

You got the right. So you're also laughing at the fact that it was. It was two players for one and the forwards pretty much matching your goal output.

[C]

And you had to pay Paterka 7 sheets where donors I believe in his last year of entry level.

[D]

Yeah, but say he ends the year with 27 goals. What's he getting?

[C]

No, I know. Yeah, good for donor.

[D]

Oh, Paterka has 12 goals.

[A]

Sorry.

[D]

So Paterka is ahead, but you guys know what I'm getting at.

[C]

Oh, for sure.

[D]

But Bouchard is standing next to Doane on the power play. And granted, it was a nice tip, but he's just like standing there. And then the. I think the best Bouchard turnover we've ever seen on the second goal by Tage Thompson, like, that is the Bouchard we know and we love. He steps out from behind the net like it is a five on all breakout. As the first drill in practice, it takes Thompson, you could tell he's like, what the. As he takes it off his stick and buries it and then gives the point at the goal. Like, yeah, that's a goal. You literally just gave me the puck. I've never seen anything like that. But thank you very much. A wild, wild event for the Bush bomb Bacardi Boosh, as Granelli has called him. But still they come back and McDavid ties it. Unreal. The place went bananas. It looked like an unreal atmosphere. Incredible moment there. He ties it up, one second to go.

[C]

Well, how about 10? Like, they're down three nothing. Beginning of the third period, he's like, all right, I'm just going to take this into own hands. Boom. Off of. He's so good at taking those pucks off the wall. And then he's gone. Like, normally, guys, it take like, Cooch is obviously good at it. He's good at, like picking it off and then it's all in his forehand to make the play. But as Far as like skating into it and then like making a Mohawk turn. And next thing you know, he's flying down the ice. McDavid is like from his own. And he does it and the offense is only does it. Just an absolute fucking freak of nature. Now I want to ask you though, about that overtime goal. Okay.

[D]

That was, I think on McDavid a little bit.

[C]

Okay, so let me. Okay, so definitely McDavid's guy originally. So as they go in the zone, it's Bush has that low guy. But there's on the wall.

[D]

You're talking right on the wall.

[C]

But there's back pressure from Leon. Okay, so it's not like Boosh is like closing on these guys quickly, right?

[D]

No.

[C]

So as he rolls up, Leon's like, well, I'm closer. He's peeling off and he's not a threat. And he's rolling up top. I'm. I would figure Boosh or might as well just stay down low. And it's not like he didn't have time to like stop and then like take a couple quick strides back towards his net where he would have been in totally fine position to like intercept the pass if it came through. He kind of just lazily turns around and kind of as he does it, he realizes that the guy might be passing it. So he's facing towards the guy who's wide open for the net and he just kind of like swings his stick. Yeah, so it's, it's the fucking body language and like the quick twitch. And you're a fucking defenseman.

[D]

You left out the best partsman. The best part was, honestly, I might have laughed more at this than the turnover. Did you see right after the goal goes in, he like one hand scoops the puck out of the net and then has the stick go around his body and grab it on the other side. Like, I'm like, unbelievable.

[C]

Why unbelievable? Normally a guy would be taking a slap shot against the boards. He's working on his one handed toe drags.

[D]

No, like, I believe that's how his response just like, oh, let me grab that. And oh, the stick's back here. I gotta grab it over.

[C]

I have said this. I would never wear another man's jersey with another man's name on my back. I'm getting a boost. Jersey.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Bacardi Boosh.

[D]

And I'm guessing that he. Listen, this is, this is talking out of turn. I'm not in that locker room. I would be surprised if he's not coming in the locker. I'm like, we'll get him tomorrow, boys.

Like I don't. Hey, if you guys see that one hand toe, you're grabbing the puck. If you did that turnover on the second goal and then you're grabbing the puck out of the net on the OT winner like that, there's no way you're coming in the room like pissed off.

[C]

He leans over to Skinner, he's like, age. You see that rocket in the fourth row behind you after they.

[D]

Oh, he's like, you see my one handed toe drag out of the. When I got the puck out of the biz.

[E]

Imagine what Dave King would have done to me if I did a back behind the back toe drag.

[D]

Getting the stick on the other side of the body is straight up men's league. Like you just lost in overtime to the Buffalo Sabers.

[C]

He's walking, he's walking in. Everybody's fucking fuming. He's like, you guys see what the 5050 was tonight?

[E]

He's, he's flipping the puck up on his stick as he's walking in the room. He's like, hey, what's up boys? Look at this.

[C]

Woo.

[E]

He's like Swaggy P. He's Swaggy pee.

[C]

Oh, hey, I see that. Did you see that recent video that Swaggy P posted where it got shared?

[D]

That's old. That's old. That's the most ridiculous move where he catches it in the air, toe drags it in the air. Okay, that one was old. I think it's okay.

[C]

That just came across my timeline where I was like, this thing got shared like over 300,000 times and there was like celebrity rockets in his, in his messages being like, that's the sexiest thing I've ever seen. Like he's getting laid because he's doing these moves, man.

[D]

So I was a little, I'm a little older than Swaggy P. So I had to ask Keith, like I, I never played against him or anything growing up, but Keith had mentioned. So for people who know Swaggy P as an influencer with some of the silkiest, nastiest mitts you've ever seen, he was unreal at hockey. Like Keith, you lost to them 7, 6, 5 and he had 6 points, right?

[E]

No, it was 6, 7, 6, 7. No, I think it was, I think it was 8, 7. They had 10 shots on net. Swaggy had 7 points and yeah, they beat us 8. But he would like, you would think he was just like a dangler. He fucking worked his dick off. Biz. He was in the fight. He Was a nasty player, man. He was. If he was three inches bigger, he'd still be playing.

[C]

Hey, that's why you put. That's why you put him on the Boston Stranglers for the Chicklets cup. No wonder. What a guy, too.

[E]

The Bouche turnover. Remember Gabric came on and he said that story where I turned one over to him.

[D]

Bush's was way worse than yours.

[E]

It was the same exact thing. No, except it wasn't an hd, which is nice.

[B]

You.

[D]

You passed it. I thought.

[E]

I thought. I thought he, like, hit it off my stick, but either way, I thought.

[D]

You kind of dished it to him. That one was like, hey, I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm doing a five on a breakout at the beginning of practice. And then, oh, there's a guy here. We're playing an NHL game, and it's Tage Thompson. Also shout out six, seven. I had this guy DM me, Whit, if you're not counting to seven when breaking the team down, you're missing out. I'm coaching an 8U team in Michigan and say Muskies on 7, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, loses it. So I have a new thing for the team. Also, somebody sent me a new 6, 7 handshake. Keith, I shared that one with you. Anyone who hates six, seven, fucking hate him.

[C]

Don't listen to the podcast.

[D]

And you can hate me and hate six, seven, but I ain't stopping.

[E]

I wish you were six foot.

[C]

I would fight someone to the death who didn't like six, seven swords.

[D]

I love it. I.

[C]

Game prior though, Buffalo got smoked by Calgary. I think if the final was 7, 4. And apparently Tage Thompson after the game was, like, still in his gear and just so rattled. So a huge. A huge win after fucking being up three, giving up the lead the third period and then. And then. And then getting the OT dub. It was Tuck who scored the OT dub, right?

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

And I saw unbelievable pass by McLeod. Like he's on the wall and you can see, like, he does the shoulder look and he doesn't try to just get it to him quick. He's like, all right, let me hold off Leon and let Boosh get the puck out of the net. Toe drag it, but, like, he made such a good play. Just like, shoulder check and not trying to force it right away and gets it to his forehand mix or whatever and make an unbelievable pass.

[C]

I could talk about Boosh for the next 20 minutes.

[D]

Oh, yeah, I love Black Pete. Blackburn tweeted.

Not the Only goal that or something to the extent of like, yeah, we could see Alex Tuck scoring more goals at Rogers this year. I would do anything to have Alex Tuck on that team. I don't know.

[C]

That just means another year of, of them not making playoffs like that.

[D]

Buffalo's not making the playoffs. What are you talking about?

[C]

I don't, I, I, I listen, I, I get where you're coming from is a, a huge, huge win to get that two points. They're not that far from a wild card where they seven points out of a spot would be. They'd have to go on a miracle run here. I know the look you're giving me. But at, at a certain point things gotta fucking turn around now, don't they? I called them pathetic online. Their whole fan base is attacking me.

[D]

Their fan base is the best.

[C]

I know.

[D]

But fan base doesn't deserve this.

[E]

No they don't.

[D]

The fan base knows we ain't making the playoffs. Like Biz. I, I actually was reminded because he daddy and schmaltzy did like a show in Buffalo last week.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

They were pictures they posted and all the Sabers fans like all the Sabers gear. They have like all the old jerseys and I was, I kind of thought back to that that the, when Carolina won it when Buffalo lost in Game 7 that year with I think one regular defenseman playing like everyone was out and the Brian Campbell over the, over the glass penalty. And I just thought back to the Chris Drury, Daniel Brier. That arena and that city is such a hockey town.

[E]

It's about good Tim Conley was.

[D]

It makes me sick for them. They are, they are a top, top five fan base in the NHL. What can we do for them showing up? They're watching the playoffs more than some of the cities with the teams in the playoffs and they can't get in the playoffs and they're not making it this year. And it makes me sick to say. I love you Buffalo. I love you, but I'm sorry.

[C]

0.00%.

[D]

0.000%.

[E]

No. Give them at least 1%. Come on. We love Buffalo.

[D]

Give him a. I'm being a realist here, guys. Right now they are sitting in dead last in the Eastern Conference. They're seven points out of the second wild card spot. They have to hop eight teams, boys. It doesn't matter that you're seven points back when you have eight teams above you.

[C]

Any game in hands, not 10.

[D]

Let's see everyone else has games in hand. Fuck no.

[E]

No.

[D]

They got a game in hand. On one team, the New York Rangers and the New York Highlanders.

[C]

Okay. All the New York teams in the mix.

[D]

And the Bruins and the Bruins. Who want to run by the Bruins tied for the top of the Atlantic Division.

[C]

Unreal.

[D]

Incredible. And I said last night in the group chat that Frazier Mitten, who seemed to be somebody in the group chat, said he was maybe a throw in in the Carlo deal. It was, it was a first rounder in Mitten. Like, I don't think it was considered that way by Toronto or Boston's brass. But that kid, man, He's. He's a 200 foot player. He's big, he can move. I like him his game a lot. And he was playing with Poschanock in St. Louis, so watch out for that.

[C]

Line that's going to go down as a tough trade.

[D]

He had three assists. Pasta.

[C]

We got Carlo for this year and he's. Well, he's out right now, I think. I think he's having surgery, somebody said. So he's probably going to be out the next couple months unless Carlo comes back and has the fucking second half and playoff run of a lifetime. That, that's an L. And I know that we needed a D, man, and I know we needed one that was, was not heavy on the books. He's not making much money and they retain salary. So hey, at least we're in win now mode. But fuck, man, that one, that one might come back to bite us.

[E]

I think the Mitten kid too, like just being traded to Boston, he's getting more of an opportunity than he ever would his first few years in Toronto, so. And he's taken advantage of it, so credit to him and, you know, it just goes to show you, no matter what, like, you just need that opportunity, right? You see, you talked about Ryan Shea earlier. Like, guys just need that opportunity to play and showcase themselves. And you got to give him credit for going out there and doing it. Now he's playing with fucking possibly.

[C]

We got a, we got a fucking tire pump management too, man. We were pretty hard on, on Sweeney and Neely and even in the off season with some of the moves, I'm like, they're going to be fucking top five worst teams in the league.

[D]

But what did I say last night? What did I say? They can sign and, and trade, like with the best of them. They just can't draft.

[E]

Draft.

[D]

Yeah, they're signing. Trades are awesome. Like, that's Steve's kid. He led the AHL and scoring. He looks great like that. I mean, that's not a Super risky signing, but they found something there that works.

[C]

Geeky, obviously. Fuck.

[D]

Even that year they lost the floor. Yeah, geeky. Even the year they lost to Florida, like, they brought in Bertuzzi, they bought in Hall, Halsey, they. They brought in Lynn home that year from Anaheim. And it just kind of seems with the draft, they. They can't do anything but signing and trading. They're solid.

[F]

When I think the most important thing they've done is. Is retool their prospects. I mean, that's something we've been so hard on Sweeney at. And you look, there's one team in the NHL that has four prospects or three or more prospects in the NCAA with nine or more goals. That's the Boston.

[D]

That doesn't do anything for me.

[F]

Why not?

[C]

Yeah, well, just because if you call it, you don't know if it's going to transfer.

[D]

And they were also the only team in the league with no players in the world juniors last year.

[F]

So it's like, it's a proper way to evaluate. Yeah, but then they. He went out in this offseason and traded for him like that Will Zellers, that kid they got as a throw in. In the Charlie Coyle trade. He's leading freshman. Freshman scorers in. In scoring this year in the ncaa.

[D]

He's nice. He's nice.

[F]

He's nasty.

[D]

I'm just saying, like, scoring goals in college, like, it doesn't really mean much to me.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Unless. Unless it's like, with a resume coming in and like a background of like. All right, yeah, like, this kid scored at every level. He's a high pick. He's scoring in college like he's supposed to. But, like, kids with 10 goals in college right now, like, a lot of those kids aren't going to play in the NHL.

[F]

I think. I think something that else is super. It's super, super encouraging is Dean Latourno. I mean, this is a kid everyone said was a bus last year. He went to BC a year early. Talk about six. Seven. Six, seven. He's six seven in height. That's pretty sick. He's got nine goals this year. He looks awesome.

[C]

Give him a max deal.

[D]

Yeah. In fairness to that kid, he was supposed to go play juniors for a year, and then Will Smith left, and so they had him come. So, like, obviously it was kind of a disaster for him last year, but he wasn't even supposed to be playing college hockey yet.

[F]

Exactly.

[D]

He does look good, dude. And he's. He's a monster.

[E]

He's. The kid isn't his dad a trainer or was a trainer for Anaheim. Is that the same kid?

[D]

No, that's. That's Sean. What's the.

[F]

What's his.

[D]

Skahan. He's a defense.

[E]

Huge too, right?

[D]

Monster defenseman. I think he was a relatively high pick. He can move. He's big. I think the Wild picked him. Yeah. Good guy. He was my trainer in Anaheim. He used to come up to me and be like, hey, man, like, after the game, big win. He's like, you got to hit the bike for 30. I was like, what?

[E]

30?

[D]

And he looks so sad, too. He's like, randy, man. He's me. I'm sorry. I don't want to do this to you. And it was all Randy. Just telling him what to do.

[E]

Bully Randy.

[D]

Oh, I had such a great Bob Murray bashing session with someone very, very successful in the game of hockey. I just. Oh, it was so fun. That Anaheim crew. Bob Murray and Randy Carlisle. What a joy to be around. Those guys were Holy.

[C]

Was it recently?

[D]

Oh, yeah. But we're not saying the name.

We're not saying the name. Coast to coast night.

[C]

I know I'm fucking.

[D]

Oh, I didn't know you knew. I didn't know you knew. I thought you couldn't remember. Biz. I do want to shout out the Leafs. Great, Great shout out. At home Monday night against Tampa held the Beast.

[C]

I told you about goaltending, buddy.

[D]

You did tell me about the Beast.

[C]

I told you about goaltending. We got three guys in the pipeline. I've been saying it since last year. It's huge. So unreal performance. That's a big one against Tampa. Great team right now. And we're staying afloat. That's it. We're staying afloat. No more. Not as much drama as there was. We just need to keep winning, you know, three or four of every five games and we'll be good to go.

[E]

Any news when Tanny's coming back? Tan f?

[C]

I don't know. Because right now they got no. No tan of and no carlors.

[E]

They need Tana Tan ev's the. The number one guy for me on that back end.

[B]

So.

[D]

Does Montreal suck?

[C]

Does Montreal suck?

[E]

It's follower time. It's follower time.

[D]

We got called up.

[E]

Yeah. So hopefully this kid can go on a run.

[C]

Well, do just had some good games. Just been inconsistent.

[D]

I think Dous is like incredible or horrible, which is an a nightmare scenario for a goaltender. Yeah, that's exactly what the guy Just be decent half the time, then be out of this world. One night And a straight up civ the next night. So. I mean, Tampa just put a beating on them last night.

[A]

Is.

[C]

Is tan still out from when he got hit and stretchered off or whatever?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Neck or whatever.

[E]

Neck, Yeah.

[C]

I thought he was coming back all right. My bad.

[E]

Him back.

[D]

He. He.

[E]

He's the, he's the key to that back end.

[D]

Oh, but that Jacob Fowler, who has been. He was incredible at Boston College. I think he won the USHL championship prior to that, has basically won wherever he's been. He has been great in the AHL for Laval and they called him up. It's kind of a situation where you could see, like a young guy coming into a young team, getting his chance and running with it. Like, I wouldn't be shocked. I mean, Montreal's had plenty of instance before. Ken Dryden comes in as a rookie, wins the Cup. Patrick Walk comes in as a young kid, wins the Cup. I'm not saying he's going to come in and win the cup, but I could see Price and be awesome. Carrie Price was great from the get go. So Jacob Fowler, the goalie of the future for the Montreal Canadiens, gets his chance. So that's exciting.

[E]

I know they didn't, like, they wanted him to go all year in the minors and just play down there. Whether, you know, they didn't think that Dovish and Montimau were going to be this bad right now because this, this last stretch of hockey for them hasn't been great. They were good in the beginning, especially Dovish was unreal in the beginning of the year. But it's one of those things where their hands are forced right now. You got to bring them up, you got to give them a look. Worst case, he goes back down, plays more games. But from everything that I've talked to people about or read about, like, he. He's a gamer. He wants the net. Like, I don't think he's going to be, you know, even playing at home in Montreal is a goal. He's got to be intimidating. But I don't think he's one of those guys where it, you know, it hits him like he's just a fucking gamer.

[D]

Yep. Also, I think Montreal would probably be like the place I would choose to play my first game. Now. I don't know if his first games would be on the road or at home, but if that's your first, like, example or.

What is the word I'm looking for? Like, your first taste.

[E]

Intro to the.

[D]

Intro to the NHL. You're just like, holy shit, this is what it's like.

[E]

Where was your first game went?

[D]

New Jersey at Continental Arena.

[C]

Oh, God.

[E]

Yours is overseas, right, Biz?

[D]

Yeah, I was at the Globe my first game. I was on a five on three with Mario Lemieux, Mark Recky, Sergey Ganchar, Sid and Sidney Crosby. Though I didn't really.

[C]

How'd that turn out?

[D]

I didn't really give a fuck.

[C]

What are you getting?

[E]

Apple.

[D]

I did get an apple. That game.

[C]

First game.

[D]

Wow. I think.

[C]

I think.

[D]

I think I did. I had three assists the next game. I know that.

[B]

What the fuck?

[C]

And then that's when you know you're going to be around a while.

[D]

And then Rick Jackman came up to me, goes, it's not this easy, kid. And it wasn't.

[E]

Was it wrong?

[D]

You were right, sir. Biz, I had another question for you. Maple Leafs related a few years back, if you remember, that sociopath Truba, he. He slashed Trent Frederick in the face and got a fine. Oh, yeah, you're talking about Bobby McMahon. Looked like it was very similar and he got a suspension.

[C]

It looked a little bit more accidental than that. Come on. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The one that was on Bjork Strand.

[D]

Yeah. So you thought that troopers was. Wasn't as bad.

[E]

No, I thought he thinks true business.

[C]

Worse. I thought that was worse.

[D]

Yeah. And Truba got a fine and McMahon got suspended. I'm agreeing with you.

[C]

Oh, okay. Well, that. Yeah, I didn't know if you were just trying to stir it up or what you were asking. Like, I. Yeah, I didn't think that he deserved to get a game suspension. It looked like it was like partly accidental.

[E]

Like.

[C]

It didn't. It didn't. It looked like it was accidental. So one game, sure. That's a tough loss for the Leafs because I feel like that line's been incredible. Like their third line has been a big catalyst for the group. So just the league fucking the Leafs again. Nothing to see here.

[E]

I mean, you do have to have control of your stick and it's. It's your responsibility when it's in your hand. So I get it. Like you hit somebody in the face. But, yeah, it does seem a little hypocritical.

[D]

I just feel like if you're gonna suspend somebody for a slash to the face, it's almost like a fine or a 10 gamer. Like you're either doing it on purpose and it's 10 games or it's like, hey, Truba just slashed Frederick in the temple. But I could tell it was momentum and he didn't mean to. So we're going to find him, but then McMahon does it and gets suspended, so. Biz, I'm with you. And you know, I'm not looking to agree with you on the day the Paige Spiranic Paul Bissonnet sandbagger drops. But I agree with you.

[E]

I agree with the power couple.

[D]

Can't even say her name last, right?

[C]

What if. What if it. A few pods? I don't even know if she's got a husband or fiance or boyfriend. What if you pods. I came on, I said, hey, boys. Me and Paige got a dog. It's getting serious.

[D]

And.

[E]

And then, hey, hey, guys. This is two weeks later. Hey, guys, Paige has the dog. This sucks. But I get to see him every six weeks.

[D]

When you. When you drop that video recently of the snake you killed, that puppy you had then was so cute.

[C]

Oh, when did I drop that video?

[D]

Where did that pop up? Was that.

[E]

I think you just showed us.

[C]

No, no. You must have saw that.

[D]

Oh, they put it in the pod.

[C]

G saying, oh, you guys did.

[D]

I didn't.

[C]

Are they able to. Yeah, that's Packer. That was Packer, the pit bull. Oh, I see him all the time. Yeah, maybe not all the time. I think the last time I saw him was probably like five months ago. No, five, six months ago. I just like, don't talk to that ex as much anymore. But there's no animosity there. Yeah, that was Annie. Katie was my last.

[D]

Instead of every other weekend, it's every other weekend on a leap year.

[E]

He gets to see them every. Every six weeks in dog years.

[C]

Yeah, that's why I don't have kids. I may be all. I'd see him every couple years.

[D]

Speaking of kids, the puke in my mouth, it got me. Remember shocker, Monday night hockey, too. Monday night, 805, I go, oh, no. The rumbling coming out both ends. And wouldn't you know, I have this world class toilet that cleans your five hole after you poop. It's insane. It's unbelievable. And on a night when I needed my 5 hole cleaned more than ever, it wasn't working.

No, I was like, this is insane. Like, how on. How is this thing broken right now? Yes, dude, I was all night. All night. That's straight.

[E]

Straight comma for you saying, I think I fucking. I. I'm immune to it.

[C]

I got the high you say that you're getting. Touch me.

[E]

Your toilet heard it and said, fuck this guy. Your booty hole heard it, said, fuck this guy. And your mouth heard it. And said, fuck this guy.

[C]

This guy's getting cocky.

[D]

Oh, my God. I was. I was like, this is hell. And then yesterday I didn't move. I'm talking. I got. I got up like three times to like go to the bathroom, but it was all done. But I, I was so wounded yesterday. I was just. And, and you know, I, I was hearing it. I. You know, how are you feeling this bad? It's over. When I had this, it was. I was fine right after. I'm like, I'm different than you. I'm not iron gut. And then I just got the call before we started, Ryder in the middle of class, all over the desk.

[C]

Boom.

[A]

The last.

[D]

The last Whitney to get it. And he's playing goalie. He's playing goalie this weekend in tonight's practice. So he's. He's going to be going into net Sunday morning, 6:20am game down the Cape. I'm like, these 6:20am games are just kicking the.

[C]

We gotta. We gotta give a couple clicks to all the janitors out there and the school teachers that like, when he. Yucks. Like, who do they just call? The janitor and he comes up and cleans it.

[E]

No, bring in ra's World.

[D]

It's old school school. They.

Make the kid who puked actually grind through it and clean it up. It's. It's teaching responsibility and what you have to do to be successful in life biz.

[E]

Remember they used to just throw wood chips on it. Like, you just see piles of wood chips. I'd be like, guys, this ain't doing it.

[D]

Ra smoking the wood chips. They're like, sir.

[C]

Ah.

[D]

Sir. Those are for a puke.

[E]

He's got a wood chip in his background.

[D]

So we are. We are. We are Amazon people here. We did.

[C]

Am I just gone?

[D]

We did. Same here. We just. We did Amazon coast to coast. We got a couple more of those this year. Monday night is prime Monday night hockey. This week it's the jets at the Senators. Prime Monday night hockey is available free to prime members in Canada. Start your free trial prime video.com for the full prime Monday night hockey schedule, visit prime video.com.

NHL.

[C]

That's a big one, boys.

[D]

It was a big one for both. Both these teams. And I think it was Tuesday night the Devils beat Ottawa at home. Brady had a couple of assists. It was. It's kind of surprising the Devils pulled that one. I think they scored late in the third, if I'm correct.

[C]

All Mark's leaking oil again.

[D]

Oh, Mark's horrible right now. All Mark's horrible. Yeah. Cody Glass scored the winner with like seven minutes to go. So Otto loses that game. The jets, they need Hellebuck back. I would be very worried about all Mark if I'm Ottawa though. What's that? Contract? Seven more years.

[B]

Omar.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, it's gotta be.

[D]

Didn't he sign when he went over there? G.

[E]

Yeah. So maybe he did have an eight year deal.

[F]

Looks like he's only signed until 2029.

[D]

Yeah, sorry, sorry.

[E]

Four.

[D]

It was a four year deal. I. I figured. Yeah. This is the first. So he's got three more after this year. But I mean they were banking on him being their guy and it. It is not. It is not pretty right now. So both teams going through goaltending issues. Both teams who need a win. The broadcast on those games are awesome. Biz. You've mentioned how they play the warm ups. I know it's odd to mention warm ups, but it is cool just to see warm ups with no audio. You're hearing the. The on ice level and seeing how guys go through their routine before games. So I don't know what's going on.

[C]

Listen, if you. If like there's some of you who like grew up playing hockey and you're just hockey enthusiasts or, or some of you maybe even even other played, but you're just like so obsessed with hockey. If you've had a long day at work, chaotic household, and you get some time alone to just like turn on the game, if you put on this Miller Time beforehand where there's no commentators talking, it's just audio and video of the guys warming up and it pants. It'll pan to like Crosby doing his stick handling on the, the. The golden arches. It'll panda the goaltender. Bobrovsky doing his fun little warmup. Right. Whoever that. That game is. So. And just hearing like pucks go off the posts and off the glass and that, you know, the stick handling sound, I just found it was very therapeutic. And actually before we started the broadcast, I had my earpieces in and I was just watching. And I would say that that's the most calm I ever went into a broadcast because it was like. It was like I was. I was in a trance. I was in a hockey trance. So if you want a little bit of breathing therapy for four games, go check out Miller Time before puck drop. Don't look at me like that, Yance. You think I'm.

[D]

It's like hockey's version of the. The never ending fireplace over the holidays. That.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

What an example.

[E]

Which I love second best example of the day.

[D]

I love throwing it on. Right?

[C]

It's a great roasting on an open fire.

Jack Frost nipping at your nose.

[D]

You know the next line?

[C]

Nope.

[E]

Oh, if you did, dude, I was going to be so impressed.

[C]

Nobody pulled your cock out.

[D]

Nobody knows the next line of that one.

[C]

We never talked about this new hockey show that's out this. What is it? Heated rivalry.

[D]

Oh, yeah, that's freaking waves.

[C]

So how about this one? So I haven't seen it. So we're at coast to coast, and I get like, like, tagged in a tweet, and someone's like, I wonder if biz is watching this heated rivalry. And I thought that they were, like, making light of the fact that, like, Toronto and Carolina is, like, not typically a heated rivalry. But there was, like, a few moments in were like, okay, like, whatever. So at that point, I was going through my silence strike that I was doing this on the Coast to coast broadcast where I did my hood up and I only had one eye out watching the game, and I refused to talk for the last seven minutes until the Leafs won the game. So I saw that. And since I wasn't talking and I wasn't really involved in the Coast to coast broadcast for those seven minutes, I. I said, there it is. If you're watching the YouTube channel, you could see it. So you. Do you guys think biz is watching Heated Rivalry? And I read it quick, so I thought they were like this heated rivalry. So I replied with a picture of just my one eye, which kind of looks like I'm looking through a butthole, given the fact that I tied up my sweater and it's just peeking out. So all of a sudden, all these, like, anim accounts, and obviously people who might be. Might be gay started going crazy at the fact that this heated rivalry show has absolutely taken off.

[A]

And.

[C]

And Avery warned us the hockey smut novels are. Are, like, the top of the list right now. People are going crazy for these, and this kind of falls under that category where I guess every 10 minutes, these guys are just teeing off on each other's assholes.

[E]

It's a show.

[C]

It's a show. It's a show. And it's apparently pretty graphic. So it's. Let's, gee, why don't you come on and talk about this? Whatever. You know, Avery was doing a breakdown on his Twitter and he's all over it.

[F]

Or. Yeah, it's taken over right now. I feel like everywhere you go, people are talking about this. And, yeah, Sean Avery's breakdown with the pointer. It was like two and a half minutes. Oh, yeah, he gets into everything. He's breaking it down with the pointer.

[C]

It's unbelievable and I guess it's pretty graphic. And, and there's something going on every 10 minutes where the premise is, is these two rivals who are playing against each other. Like at one point they're even doing a press conference, talking about this battle they're about to go to. And they're playing footsies underneath the table at the press conference.

[D]

Like you and Paige in the, in the, in the cart.

[C]

Exactly.

[F]

You know who has seen every episode?

[C]

Ra Seen it.

[F]

Ra seen every episode.

[D]

You're surprised? RA seen a TV show.

[C]

I just didn't know he would be as quick to the gun on this one. So I, I guess we could bring him in after we send it to Santino. So I, I'll hand it over to you. Whip and I want to talk to Ra about heated rivalry and guys teeing off on each other's buttholes.

[D]

Yeah, let's, let's. Yeah, exactly. Andrew Santino is an all time comedian, very successful. We got to know him at the Internet Invitational. We were supposed to do a sandbagger with him. We're going to do that. But it got rained out in LA, so we sat down with him a hilarious 90 minutes. I promise you guys, if you like laughing, you'll enjoy this. An unreal guy. And we appreciate him coming on. So without further ado, Andrew Santino.

[A]

Just.

[D]

Take a minute here, guys, and talk about body armor. This episode is presented to you by body armor Flash IV. Flash IV delivers faster, longer lasting hydration with over 2000 milligrams of electrolytes and no artificial dyes or sweeteners like those other drinks. None of the crap, none of the stuff that shouldn't go into your body, right? It's just 2,000 milligrams of electrolytes. So whether you're training, traveling, or just feeling the heat, work hard, hydrate hard with body Armor Flash IV and grab yours today at a local 711 convenience store.

Guys, let's take a moment and talk about game time. We are a few days into the 12 days of game time, which means they are giving away prizes every day with a $5,000 grand prize at the end. If you still have not entered, go to 12daysofgametime.com it is free and only takes a few seconds. This season, Game Time is celebrating the moments that made people fans and they have been enabling those moments for the past 12 years now. So Ra talked about all the moments he's been at. This week I will be at the last game ever at Matthews Arena. An incredible venue that's had so many memor memorable moments for Northeastern hockey and many, many other hockey games over the past hundred years. $100 right now on game time to get in to see BU play Northeastern at the last game ever at Matthews Arena. These are the types of moments game time is celebrating. Go to 12days of gametime.com today for a chance to experience one of those moments.

What is up, folks? We are in LA with a good buddy, a pal, a comedian, an actor, a golfer, and a man who has been big timed by Biz Nasty at this Andrew Santino.

[C]

What's you're supposed to golf. He's like, I'm not spending that much time with that in a cart.

[B]

No, I wanted to golf, but you guys chose to come to la. The only time it rains the whole year and it rained for four days straight. And we were talking, we were texting about it and I said, might be the day, might be good, might be bad. But it was car path only. We wouldn't have had a good day.

[D]

No, we don't need that.

[B]

I'm not doing that.

[D]

You need to be. And you, you would have to play with biz. You need more time in the cart.

[B]

No, no, I would have tore it up today, buddy.

[C]

Cart path only, though. That would have been a nine hour round at least.

[D]

At least.

[B]

No. Yeah, No. I would have still loved you, but I'd have been drinking a lot more than I usually would have. I'd have been smashing.

[E]

Dude.

[B]

The walk from the cart to the. I just played in Phoenix and they had to do that too because they just like overseeded and reopened.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And they were like carts only. And at some point I was like, should have walked.

[D]

You walk way more when you do.

[B]

I was like, we should have just walked with the. Had the caddy carry the bag. Because the caddy's just walking. He's walking way less steps. We got to go back and forth and back and forth. And it's desert golf. So if you hit it out of bounds at all or like even off in the end of the shit, you're walking twice as far. Go back at a club, come back. I was like, nah, bring three clubs.

[D]

None of them are the right club. Hate that walk back.

[B]

Also, the one caddy didn't even have one. He's going off his brain.

[D]

Oh, it's Melosi.

[E]

Did he have the slope on?

[B]

Yeah, he had the slope he goes, 1. There's got to be 184. I was like, gotta be or is. What is it? He goes, I. I know this course, man. I was like, all right, fine.

[C]

Last night was the first time I've seen you live, and you mentioned that you. You were in Arizona and that you found the people very dumb.

[B]

Oh, yeah, I went to asu. I know my own kind, dude. Harvard of the West. I mean, whenever somebody goes, why did you go to asu? It's like, dude, I couldn't get into any other school, you know? Did you guys do. When you were in high school, did you do ACTS or sat?

[E]

Never went sat.

[B]

You don't go to high school.

[C]

I barely graduated.

[B]

Yeah, same. But I did acts. Okay. Okay. If you didn't do act, the numbers.

[E]

Okay, what's it out of 36, would you get 24?

[D]

Oh, that's real bad.

[B]

I'm an idiot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You. Dude, you should get. You should be sniffing 30 for sure if you have any brain cells.

[D]

So you weren't getting in anywhere else.

[B]

Dude, I was doing drugs and alcohol in high school. I wanted to do sports, hook up with chicks and party. And I thought, high school is going to figure itself out. And then by the time I got to the end, everybody's like, I'm committed to Iowa. I'm going to U of I. I'm going to. And I was like, I'm going nowhere, dude.

[D]

I got nothing.

[B]

I got nothing. And my. But my dad's best friend's son, who, him and I became friends because we'd go to college football together. He was like, my cousin goes to Arizona State. You got. You should come and visit with me. And I go, he's an idiot. Well, I was like, I don't even know. I'll get into there, dude. We went out to ASU together, cook mushrooms, went to a house party, sat on what would be my future dorm, which is kind of surreal. We sat on the porch out there and, you know, smoking a cigarette. And I was like, we should go to school here, dude. And he was like, we really should. And we did. We literally did. It was like stoner mentality manifested truth. We went for a year, and then. He was a bright kid. He was, like, actually smart. And between freshman, sophomore summer, he knocked the girl up and never came back. And I never saw the kid ever again.

[D]

No. Don't even know what he's doing now either.

[B]

No. No idea.

[D]

He's teaching at asu.

[B]

Yeah, he probably. Yeah, no, he got a girl from home Pregnant, he went back home and knocked up a girl. So he stayed at home with his mom and dad. Oh, so the idiot lasted. Kids at home, listen up. If you're an idiot, it might work out.

[C]

Out of state tuition there is insane, isn't it?

[B]

How'd you. When I was in school, out of state wasn't that expensive. It was one of the cheapest out of state schools in the country. You can look that up in 2000. What? I went there in. In 2002. It was the. It's one of the cheapest out of state schools because they wanted out of state kids. It was a lot of in state kids. Now it's. Dude, it's. There's a. You go to ASU now it's a billion. It's way too big.

[C]

Yeah. You're never getting out of student debt.

[B]

No, no, no. Who cares? You don't have to pay it off. Thanks, Obama.

[D]

Thanks a lot.

Did you start doing comedy then? When did you know, like, I got to try stand up.

[B]

Yeah. College. I really, like, loved it. I tried to sneak my way into. I even said that the club I played, I played the Tempe Improv and I've never played it, which is crazy because when I would go back, I would do other clubs and then I started doing theaters, so I never got a chance to go. But in college, I used to see a chick that was working there and she would give me tickets. So I used to go watch Stand up, but I was too scared. I was 20 years old. I was like, I'm not going these, you know.

[D]

Were you writing stuff, though?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I was, but I wasn't going to. I don't know what I was going to do with it. Yeah, but I was just putting it down. I was putting down ideas or. Or I'd write like a sketch or something, and I was. I didn't have the balls to go because back then Arizona had one club, maybe there was one more way up north, but now there's like six.

[D]

Right? Yeah.

[B]

The world is different. But. So I was like, I'll just start when I get to LA. And on the 4th of July, I. I got in a U haul, moved to Long beach and slept on a guy's Lazy Boy for a couple of months until I got enough money to get. I got a job and then I got a roommate and then I moved up to la.

[D]

So what was your job while you were trying to be a comedian? You had to get a real job.

[B]

I had so many gigs, like, real jobs. I bet Notice I was hooking up with this girl who was a physical therapist. Oh, dude, this is so mean, too. Oh, my. She had. She had, like. She had, like, really, like. She was beautiful, but she had, like, thinning hair. And all my buddies behind my back called their hairpiece. And dude, it was. They were like, had a piece headpiece. And I was like, are you saying herpes, dude? She doesn't have herpes. And they're like, no, herpes had a piece because she was Middle Eastern, dude, they were lighting me up. But. But thanks to herpes, I got myself a job at the PT office. So she. I got to work at a physical therapy office as like a. A gopher. It was like, clean shit up, put the. Put the mats away, get us a roller. Check people in. Yeah, but also, the dude that ran the place loved me, so he was like, hey, man, I'll. You know, I'll give you some extra hours because I needed the cash. And he was like, I can't. You. You can't work with any of the doctors. He's like, that's illegal. But he's like, but you can just stay by me and I'll give you extra money if you, like, do more for me. So he. That. That dude helped me out. That was my first gig.

[C]

Were you, like the life of the party? And would you. Would you try that material?

[B]

I was cracking jokes the whole time. Yeah, like, there was an old lady, you know, like. And if they were like, hey, can you get her on this roller? And I. I'd help her get on the thing, and I'd be like, you know, if you fart when I put you on this, it's not a big deal. Most people fart on these things, so I give them comedy and relief, you know, and they. When they would fart, you know, I'd be like, he just farted on a. Call her out.

[C]

Get on the pa. Yeah, I, like.

[B]

Just farted on table nine. No, but it just. It was like a way for me to just start that drumming up. But every gig I had was me trying out, just being. I've always been a jag off, like, my whole life. Then I served, you know, I did. I did. I did bartending and serving and all that nonsense. And then when I moved to la.

A dude got me a job. My first job was working at a studio as like a. A pa, A production assistant. Just running gopher again. And then after that, a guy was like, a dude I knew in a band was like, hey, there's a music this Music touring company, they need someone to just push paper. And I needed a day job because at night you want to do standup. So I would work, you know, till 4:30 and then go to the club and go to the open mics, and I go across the street to the Comedy Store, do the mics and then go to the east side and do little, you know, whatever putz around shows, and then drink all night and then do it all over again every day for years and years.

[D]

That Comedy Store like, we watched you last night. It was awesome. It was David Spade yourself. What was it? Nick Kroll. I recognize that.

[B]

Nick Spade crawl.

[C]

Eliza, there's two rooms I. I've actually never been to the one we went to last night. I would always go to more than two.

[B]

There's three. Well, that one's called the main room. That's the biggest. That's like 450. There's the original room, the. Or the one that you guys went to on accident.

[D]

Oh, man. I walked in and this poor kid, he was just, you know, I felt for him. He was struggling and he. You could tell he knew he was struggling, and I was like, santino still has to do like this stuff. And then he's like, dude, I don't think we're in the right room. We went in and boom, it was you.

[B]

That's the open mic. That's where the young guys.

[D]

But you were there. You were in that room.

[B]

Yeah, bro. Everybody goes to those rooms. No, you don't know. Get paid. Usually you're losing money doing those. Usually you got to pay for parking or, you know, you're paying for gas parking and whatever and, you know, so you're not making a dime on that. You're losing money most nights trying to get up, and all you want to do is do your best. Three minutes. It's three minutes, which I couldn't. I can't do three minutes now. If you. I don't know. I mean, we do an hour. So like three minutes. Like, I'm not even. I said hello last night.

[D]

You were 20 minutes. And yeah, you could. That to you, that's nothing.

[B]

No, that's a cakewalk. That's. That's the way we do it is like when. When you start to build an hour of material, you do, you know, you. I like to do it in like either four 15 minute chunks or three 20 minute chunks. So when we do the store, in my mind, I do. I'll do my. My. My middle or my. Or my beginning chunk of the hour to work it out. And then sometimes I'll move bits around to see which works where better.

[D]

You know, being in the. Or as you call it, like the original jv. Right.

[C]

Like.

[B]

Well, see, that's only because on the. On regular, like on a. On like, you know, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and the weekends, we do. Headliners do go in there. It's just like the showcase room kind of. You're working out material and then when you get into the main room, you know, sometimes we do both, but you go into the main room, that's more of like a show. You gotta. You gotta. You gotta play a show.

[D]

I mean, you gotta.

[B]

Not everybody does, but I think you should. You know the woman that ran the club, Pauly Shore's mom, Mitzi Shore, that was her thing. She was like, test out your in here and get your ass in there and kill.

[E]

You know, she was like a mafia boss almost.

[B]

She didn't around. If you didn't crush. Dude, she. You. She were. You'd get that. You'd get relegated.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Next day. Also, if you had a bad set and if you weren't a good guy, like, if you kind of had an attitude or you were just not, you know, she was quick to be like, no sets next week. She wouldn't. You would put in for spots. You know, we put in for spots before the week. And then you get. They'll text you, hey, you're on Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, or whatever. And if you weren't killing and you weren't doing good, you'd get no spots the next week. Sometimes you wouldn't get spots. Some I saw guys, they wouldn't get spots for a month because they weren't bringing it. Oh, and it was a dude. But it's, you know, hey, if you're not doing well on the ice, you're going to hear about it. You know what I mean? It's like that's the same world. And I think that's appropriate. Like, you know, if you're trying to become a professional and you're not playing to your ability, you got to go practice then. Then go get your ass out. Go work on material. Go. Right? And then you can earn it back. Which I think was a. It's a noble. It's a noble way to see who's gonna really make it or who's gonna really, like, have the balls to stick around and put in the work instead of just, you know, I'm doing my best. It's like your best is.

[D]

But when you say that's what putting in the work that's hard because, like, you know, hockey, you can work on different things. Comedy. If you're not doing well, you gotta question, like, am I funny enough? Right. Like, how do you improve? Like, you obviously got better.

[B]

Yeah. As to you. Well, honestly, if the. The. There's no secret. It's writing a lot and working it out. So you have to write a lot and go try it somewhere and write and try. I'm at a place in my career. I'm lucky. Like, I built a big audience. Like, it's different now, but when I was young, you just had to do the work and have the balls to. To put it out there and actually believe in it and sell it. You're a salesman, dude. You're a joke salesman.

[C]

It.

[B]

If you can't sell the joke, why would they buy it? Why are they. If you don't believe in it, why would they laugh?

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

So you've got to sell them. Like, you've got to give it to them. And then. I know, like, at my level or at. When you start to get an audience, every. Like, I could do that. He looks so comfortable. It's like, well, that's my. You know, that's like.

[D]

You should have seen the beginning, right?

[B]

Exactly.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

You should have seen what it first looked like.

[C]

You know, a lot of scar tissue. I was going to ask you about the dynamic behind the scenes there. So, like, for instance, last night, is there about 50 people back there, like comedians between both rooms?

[B]

No, because when we. When we're done, we usually go home. Like with you guys. Like, the moment I was out, I was like, I'm out. Let's go. You know, when you're young, you stick around. But when you get older, a lot of guys, you married, you have families, you got other shit to do. You reach an age where you just get in, you get out. I'm there 10 minutes before my spot, and I'm there five minutes after it's over. I say hi and bye to the staff and I'm back in the whip. And I'm either at the house or I'm having dinner or out doing something else. But, like, at any given time in the green room, if it's a big busy show and there's people there you want to kick it with, like, if there's a guy that I haven't seen in a long time, yeah, there's like 15 people back there kind of chumming around, talking shit, and then depends on the night. But then a lot of nights now, especially as we get older, people like, I gotta get home, dude. My kid, you know what I mean? I got my kids and my. I gotta bring my kid to school in the morning. So it's not like it used to be, but when you're young, dude, those are the days. I tell every young comic, I'm like, soak it up, man. Because when you're young, you all hang out, they go out. They all go out afterwards. They go get. They go get drinks, they go get food. They have no responsibility, they're not married, they got no kids. You know, they don't. They don't have anything.

[D]

So it's like the next night you're free.

[B]

Yeah, you're free. And, you know, then you get older and it's. It's a little different, you know, But. But backstage it can be a great hang. There's nights where it's like, me, Kroll and Spade were busting each other's balls, and that's the most fun. Like, that's my favorite shit, is when we're sitting back there. They do that at the Comedy Cellar in New York a lot. There's a table upstairs. Everybody sits around and just, I mean, just shits on each other. They can't wait to find something to on. Like, the moment you walk up, you're like, what's up? And everybody's like, would you get a haircut? And right away you're like, yeah, I got a hairc. And it's. Then it's going to open up. It opens up of just a vault of some other dickhead. They can't wait to shoot at you. It do. They've all got guns. They're sitting there with guns. It is like the Mafia. It's insane.

[E]

If you, like, leaving asu, going to L. A, do you have that vision? Because some guys go to New York too, right? To try to make it.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Or if you come to la, are you more focused on. I want to get into movies, TV as well?

[B]

No, I did truthfully, like, okay, I'm from Chicago, but I didn't want to go home because I didn't want it to be easy because I knew I would have, what, lived at my mom's house and then, you know, been getting high with the same old kids that I got high with in high school. I probably would have been lazier. So I said, I'm. I'm not going to come home. I'm either going to do, like, LA or New York. And I visited la and I was like, dude, yeah, yeah, I got to do this. I mean, it Was I grew up in shit weather my whole life. So I was like, I want to kind of live in nice weather. So when I left Arizona, I was like, I want sunshine, man. And out here, yeah, it was a wealth of opportunity of like, TV was booming back then. So it was like, if you're funny enough, you can get on, you know, you do a Conan or you do Leno and you can get on audition to be on a TV sitcom or something. I mean, that's not what it's like today for those guys. But that was the hope, you know what I mean? I was like, oh, I want to get on tv, get a credit and then start touring, then hopefully get on Comedy Central. I mean, that was our.

[D]

It was no Netflix. There was no specials.

[B]

Comedy Central was our North Star. If you could get on Comedy Central, that was the move you wanted to get just for laughs, which is a festival. And then you want to get a, you know, a 30 minute, you know, or half. Well, they used to do things like lounge lizards, these 15 minute spots, or they did another one called like A Night with or something. But that's what you wanted. Like, I got my first half hour on Comedy Central. I filmed it in Boston. I filmed my first. I did it at the El Royale, which is across the street from the Wilbur, right behind Royal Theater, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, it's like behind the W on, right on that same block. But we all filmed our half hours there. And that was like my first, that was my first, like big TV stand up thing, you know, and then you think, dude, I got this, it's home free, but you're back at the Courtyard Marriott jerking off in the hand. Yeah, same old story.

[E]

Now nowadays these kids, like, for you, going on Leno or those shows, nowadays these kids just want to get on your podcast or Joe's or Theo's. Right?

[B]

Well, yeah, because those shows are gone. I mean, you know, like, like for me, it was Conan or Letterman. Yeah, I didn't really care about Leno's show. Not, no disrespect to him, but like, I always loved Letterman the most. So I wanted to get on Letterman or I wanted to do Conan, because Conan was here. So I got Conan, I did that. And I never did Letterman because by the time I was like submitting for Letterman, it was kind of the end of that reign. And so that, that, that, that thing I wish I did, that was one thing. I wish I, you know, had a feather in my cap for that. But yeah, nowadays kids want to Come on. Bad Friends. Or they want to. Come on. They want to do Rogan or Theo or Sugura and Burt's thing that gives you more resonance in the comedy world. But also do late night spots. Guys still do them. I just. It's just not.

[D]

They're different now. It's not all the viewership down.

[B]

Yeah, you put your special. You. Most guys now put their special up on YouTube. You know, like Gillis, like, Gilly's a. One of my good friends, and Gillis put a special up there, and these guys could look it up. It's got to have 45 million views or something like that. It's something insane. And, you know, if at the time he did that somewhere else, that wouldn't have gotten as many eyeballs. But YouTube catapulted.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, his career and his talent. I mean, he's a raw. He's a raw talent. He's amazing. But, like, YouTube helped it. Just spread it on the Internet without TV. 49 million. There you go.

[D]

I was 49. That's his. That was his first one, that or that.

[B]

I don't know if that was his very first special, but that was his first. That, like, popped. That's what really popped. I mean, 49 million. Fucking. That's insane. Insane. I mean, it's unheard of.

[D]

Do you have one thing you look back on like that that popped? You're like, dude, this is kind of.

[B]

I mean, I had a lot of things I thought. I mean, I did. My first gig was. My first gig was Punked on MTV years and years ago. Yeah, I did punk. And that was that. I thought in my mind, I was like, brother, we're gonna. We're coasting, dude. And then again, back in that Courtyard Marriott, jerking off in a hand towel. It's the same. It. I thought that was kind of my break. And then I got a sitcom and I did a bunch of different stuff. But, like, the thing truly that, like, really splashed my career, you know, five and a half years ago, was doing Bad Friends with Bob. I mean, it was all going great. Like, life was good. I was touring, I was making money. I was popping on TV shows I'd get on. You know, I got on Curb. The first thing I did. I did the Office and then I did Dave. Like, what is. We did that, like six years ago we started, you know. Yeah, that was big for me, you know, but, like, Bad Friends changed my life forever.

[D]

And did, you know, kind of right away, like, we got something here.

[B]

Yeah, it sounds stupid to say yes but, yeah, dude, I did. Like, when we sat down and we did our. The very first episode, he came on my podcast on Whiskey Ginger, and we couldn't release it. And we've talked about it a lot. People like, release it. I was like, brother, it's just so raw. It's. Well, we got into it like a. You know, we were like, who could say the most foul shit?

[C]

Okay.

[B]

It was insane. We've talked about it.

[C]

It's like the Wu Tang unreleased album.

[D]

Yeah, dude, you could release it now.

[C]

That the guy.

[B]

I don't know, brother.

[C]

They fired it for.

[B]

It's probably not a good idea to release it now.

[C]

We might buy it for 4 million.

[B]

So you know what I said? I go, when my career is, like, done, done. And we both said this, and we don't give a shit. We'll. We'll. We'll somehow auction it or sell it and put all the money to charity. So then it's like, are you mad at me? We donated every dime. And they're like, it's the most offensive, crass, disgusting. And I'm like, yeah, but it goes to the kids. You know what I mean? Like, Children's Hospital got the money for the kids, dude. Racism for the kids.

[C]

Were you. Were you, like, not as receptive to the podcast world because maybe you're a little foreign to it and you're like, what's. What's all this? Or, like, were you, like, Rogan?

[B]

Rogan was our. Rogan truly started the wave of comics doing it. And he always pushed. Like, when I was young, I used to open for Joe. And when he first took me out, man, and I was so gen. Like, genuinely so appreciative of, like, him taking me on. We played a bunch of theaters and treated me great and was always like, dude, you gotta start pods. Because he had been doing pods forever, and he knew. Oh, he. Brother, he was way ahead of his time. And he was like, you got to do it, man. You really got to do it. And I was like, I don't want him. And I don't have the equipment. I don't know if I have the money to start it. I don't have the. I don't have anything. And he kept pushing me and being like, I don't give a shit, dude. Just scrounge it together. Do it from your house. Do it from your garage. Like, just do it anyway. Do it from the store. Do it. You know? So I started it. I started my. My Whiskey Ginger. Like, I think it's gotta be, like, seven or eight years ago now. And I did it in an animation studio in an office. I knew a guy that worked there, and after hours, he let me use the code to go record in there because they had, like, soundproof rooms. And I'd go record in there. So I'd have to. Sometimes I have to fight with. The janitor would be coming in. The little. Little lady, she's like, you want me? I have to clean up. I have to clean. And I'm like, can we recording? And you come back. She's like, I will cut now I have to clean. So some of the recordings, like.

Yeah, but that was the beginning. Yeah, that was my guess. With the vacuum.

[D]

Were you just, like. Were you saying jokes? Were you just, like, talking about anything?

[B]

We just. I knew. I want to do a comedy podcast about the whole impetus of my show of Whiskey Ginger was. And still is. I mean, but just a lot of people are sober now was we would have a cocktail. Whiskey. We'd have. We'd have a drink and we'd talk about the very first time you got wasted, you know, like, the very first time. And what was that like when you were a kid? Like, what was the first time that. You know, because I started the show telling a story. Like, the first time I got wasted with my buddy Matt, I'll never forget, and we stole, you know, a bottle from his old man and got fucking hammered, threw up everywhere. And I was like, everyone has these stories, the first chunks of times that they got hammered and how they stole it from an uncle at a holiday party, blacked out, threw up, you know, and so it was that. And then it curved into, like, you know, tell the first story of the time you, you know, you. You got wasted. And then what's your life like now in comedy? So I was interviewing comedians and, you know, and then it's. Then it grew. Then it got, you know, actors and athletes and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and whatever, whatever. But I knew I always liked it, but I didn't know. I didn't know it was going to be a part of my career.

[D]

Yeah, the biggest part. Really.

[B]

Yeah. I just wanted to do it. But now it's the thing. It's the way we talk to the people, you know, because I'm not. I don't like the. I'm not good on Instagram and all that. I'm not really good at it. So now I'm like, well, this is it. If I'm talking to them every day, if I can crack a couple of jokes or try out on the show. That's what we do.

[D]

And what you told us last night about what you've added to your live shows, that's unreal.

[B]

Like, we do an interactive thing when we do Bad live, and we probably won't do Bad Friends Live again for a while, but because we have to plan a new tour. But we do this thing where when you sit down, we run a video. Well, we run some of our greatest clips, you know, and we run a video. And in between the video, there's a big QR code and you can scan it with your phone and it brings you to a site and it prompts you with like, hey, do you have a secret hidden talent? You know, like you're.

[F]

Are.

[B]

You think. You think you know the episodes better than someone else? We have a trivia and they can win prizes and all this shit. I told you guys last night that the hidden talent was in almost every city. A girl would be like, I can queef on command. And we'd be like, we gotta see it. We gotta see it, right? And the girl from Denver, you come on the tour with us, dude.

[C]

Love it.

[B]

Queefon biz. Quif on the biz. What's the biz?

[C]

I want? I. I prefer the squirters. Oh, you do it on command, dude.

[B]

We can prompt them with that too. Who can squirt on biz?

[C]

Let's up our game.

[B]

We'll get you in a little kiddie pool just to keep it cleaner for the staff. But the girl who queefed the funniest man was in. In Denver. I don't remember that girl's name, but, man, she was unbelievable. She. She wasn't shy at all. She grabbed the mic right away. She got down in the position she gets in to. To suck it in. And Bobby got on the keys and they played like, rhythm. And she could like, like to the boxing. Oh, she was beatboxing out. Yeah, she was beat boxing. Yeah, she was beat boxing. It was wild, dude. But so we got our fans. The reason is because our fans, the way we grew that show was we tried to make it fan interactive and like, you know, not like in the comment section, but more like, how do we, like, call the fans? How do we have bits for the fans? And when we did the live, I was like, we gotta let them be on stage with us and have a little bit of fun if they had something fun to offer, you know, we didn't let everybody up, but we had the producers would go through pre show and they'd be like, all right, we have this, this, this, this, and this and who do you want? And we'd figured out, dude, sometimes we had. We had guys, at the end of the show, we sing an improv song together because Bobby's really good on the piano. Like, like phenomenal. He's Asian. He's Asian.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, they don't have a choice.

[D]

They made him play.

[C]

He's one of the most self deprecating, intelligent people in the world. In the world.

[B]

Intelligent? No, but self deprecating? Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, he's got.

[B]

He's an idiot savant. Yeah, that's what he is. He's a brilliant. He's. He is, he's a, he's an enigma. He's. I mean, he's my best friend and I think he's a genius. He's a comedic genius. But he's got all these hidden talents, people. He wrestled in high school. You know, his brother was like a state championship wrestler or something. Yeah, it was crazy. And he played piano. And I thought, what if we do the live element? Because we used to do it on the show and he would just improv a song and we would sing. And one time we were in Massey Hall, Toronto, and we called up this kid who could play, who was a, who was a musician. And dude, he blew the room away. I mean, it was like. I couldn't believe it. I was like, we're telling fart jokes. This guy can really sing, you know, and we put him on the spot, but we'd have fans interact with us and do these moments that are like, you know, forever embedded. And luckily we documented all of it, so we put together a documentary. And I don't know what we're gonna do with it. Like, we don't know yet. We just wanted to capture all of it. So we've got it. And then maybe we'll throw it up on Netflix at some point or something. I don't know.

[E]

Keep it.

[D]

Like, can you explain, retell what Bobby's days are like?

[E]

There's no way he's awake.

[D]

I think I. Awake. I think I asked you, does he watch like, football? Like football?

[B]

Yeah, soccer. He, like, the only sport he likes is soccer. But he, he, he sleeps till about 2:30 or 3pm He's 54 years old.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

He plays video games because. Because he plays video games from 10pm Till, you know, 3, 4 in the morning. So then he sleeps till 3 or 4pm he'll waggle his way to the podcast and then complain, I haven't eaten all day. It's 6:30, dude, and you haven't eaten all day. Plays video games all night, does the pod. And then he goes to the store and he does it all over again. Now he's single, so he's going on dates and shit. Now he's got to be. He's got to be a gentleman and take girls out. But he takes his girls to the same four spots. That's the funniest part. He takes them all the same four restaurants. He likes Major Domo downtown. He likes that David Chang's joint he likes to go to. He loves, he loves Koreatown because all the Korean barbecue. He loves those because he, you know, he, he likes the atmosphere of that. So he goes to like, Chosun Gobi. He's there. I'm naming all the spots. You go there, you're gonna see him on a day.

[C]

How attractive are the girls that he's bringing? Are probably wrong.

[B]

Phenomenal. Yeah, I don't think he's. I don't think I've seen him. I don't think I've seen him with anything less than like an 8.5. I don't think he's even. I don't think he ducks below that.

[D]

Like, I just want to see that conversation or hear that conversation. Like, what the hell are they?

[B]

He shows me all the girls and he shows me what he. I've sometimes on the show I'll read his DMs, you know, and it's just, it's zero effort. I mean, it's unbelievable. It's unbelievable.

They'll have some great banter and then.

[D]

He'Ll go, we be competing.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They'll have great banter. And then he'll go, sounds good. And then she'll say like a whole thing. And he'll go, okay. That's all it is. I mean, good for him. The kids got. The kids got. The game is no game.

[E]

Right?

[B]

The game is, do you want to hang out? And if they're like, well, I'd like to get, you know, then he doesn't respond. They go in and he's gone.

[C]

And then they're back a few weeks later.

[B]

Yeah, they pop it. They always do. They, they always come back.

[C]

Dude, I was going to ask you about maybe like a situation where you, where you bombed or it was like.

[B]

Just, oh, dude, we bomb so much when we're young. I mean, I'll give you a funny story about when I bought me and me Gary Veder. Shout Out Gary Veeder. One of the funniest Comics, New York guy, me, Gary Veeder and a couple other guys were going to Vegas. We got a job to do a corporate gig now. Corporate gigs, dude. Most. They suck. They suck because it's a bunch of suits.

[E]

Free money, though.

[B]

Yeah, it's a ton of money. So you'd have to do them. So you're already in your mind, you're like, this is going to suck shit. But whatever. It was a trip to Vegas and I was with Veter and I was like, dude, this is going to be great. We're going to get stakes, get hammered, go play cards. So I go out there and it was for Jim Beam. And I'm thinking, this is right up my alley, dude. A bunch of like old Southern boys. Whiskey drinking Southern boys. I was like, I'm gonna kill.

[C]

We go playing that first podcast with Bobby Lee.

[E]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Yeah, they'll love all that. I like when you say those bad words, man. You can say that around me, dude. I don't care. So we go out to Vegas and we're backstage and Joel McHale was hosting the whole weekend. You know. You know Joel, Joel's. Joel's like, he's real professional. He's TV host guy. He did the Soup for years and funny guy, very funny comic. And Joel comes backstage and he's like, what's up, boys? I was like, what's going on? What's wrong with you? He's like, I've been here for two days hosting this. There was like a weekend of partying for them. And I go, man, you look like shit. He's like, oh, yeah, I can't wait to see you eat it out there. I was like, I'm gonna kill, dude, you're out of your mind. And then he goes, okay.

He comes back, he goes back on stage, and then I look out and I'm like, what the fuck is going on?

[D]

No life out there, bro.

[B]

Jim Beam got acquired by Suntory. Whiskey. Japanese Whiskey. It was 180 Japanese businessmen.

[E]

Oh, no English.

[B]

No English. Sitting in circular tables eating steaks. They're half of the guys. Yeah. It was my Bobby Lee nightmare.

[E]

Yeah. Wasn't awake.

[B]

They got their backs to us. And I was like, holy shit. And I went out and tanked. I bombed in a way that I couldn't believe. Like 12 minutes, felt like seven days and I could. Dude, I was eating it, eating it, eating it it. And I'm not going to be able to say it and you'll know why, but I bombed. Vitor did. Vitor did better Than me. Because he saw.

[C]

He just. So. They're not understanding. They're not laughing jokes. Aren't they?

[B]

Don't relate.

[C]

Are you kind of now trying to amuse yourself? Because you just know you're not going to get it.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

I'm just telling.

[B]

I'm making myself laugh.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

Not a one of them is laughing. And then Alonzo Bowden, who's a phenomenal comic, you know, Alonzo's like, got to be 6, 6, 6, 5. Big, tall black dude.

[D]

Hugh.

[B]

I mean, big dude. Like, big, powerful presence, hysterical. And Alonzo's there and at the corporate. A lot of times, they're like, don't cuss no dirty shit. Don't cuss. Like, keep it as clean as you can. You can say a few words, but they're like, don't. You know, don't get dirty. I'm not dirty anyway. But, like, you know, I was like, all right, we'll keep it tighter so your mind is thinking about it. Alonzo was like, fuck this, because he saw how bad everybody was doing. So he gets out there to a room full of Japanese guys and goes, y' all ever seen an N word this big before? And they lost it. I was like, that's all I need to do was say the N word. And then I would have killed.

He cr. Dude, he crushed. He crushed because he was like, no, I'm gonna. I'm gonna say whatever I want.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know what I mean? And that's the code. That's kind of the secret code to young comics. It's like, you never change your act. Do what you always do. Don't get in your head. If they. If they. If they like it, they like it. There's almost nothing you can do in those situations.

[D]

If I was bombing, I feel like I would just hate the people that are out now.

[B]

Oh, you do so much. Oh, yeah, you do.

[D]

I want to kill every.

[B]

You think about. You think about gasoline in a match in the middle of it.

[E]

Those are on them.

[B]

Like, you do pick on them a little bit, but then if they're not liking your act, and then you're picking on them. Oh, brother. That gets cold fast.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, the biggest mistake young comics make is a. You know, it's usually a drunk girl. All right, I'm not being a pig, but it's almost always a drunkard. A drunk dude, you can shut up pretty fast. But a drunk girl, for some reason, man, that's like their superpower to be like. And now you gotta understand her. That and Then you start shitting on her and you make her look dumb, and then everyone feels bad.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So then it gets lower because then when you. When you just. When you light her up, then she's like, hurt because a guy you light up, and everybody's like, yeah, that dumb ass. You light up a girl. Everyone's like, that's mean. It's like she was talking the whole show, but then the mood goes down. So now at this stage in my life, dude, ignore. I don't. I don't. I may chat with someone for fun, but I'm never gonna. I don't shoot at anybody.

[D]

Not attacking.

[B]

That's not my shit, dude. You saw. I go up there, I tell my shit. I move on. I may say something to someone for fun, but it's more. They're in it with me versus, like, look at that stupid hat.

[D]

They're enjoying it and you're bringing them in a little.

[B]

I'm not into picking on these guys, dude. They. These guys, these people, they paid real money. They got a sitter. You know what I mean? I don't need to also make fun of how fat that guy is. You know, he knows he's fat. You know, he got. He left the house that way. So, like, make him laugh and then send him home instead of like. Like, you know, I don't like that. The thought for me was always like, is the drive home gonna be uncomfortable? Is he gonna be in the car being like, well, that guy was a dick. And you know what I mean, like.

[D]

And it's laughing.

[B]

Yeah, she was losing it. Yeah, I like that guy. He's plotting to kill me.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

No, I'm not interested. I don't.

[F]

I don't.

[B]

It's just not my style. But some guys are. You know, we talked last night about Aries Spears. Aries, dude, he loves that stuff. Like, Aries was the guy. He had the girl with down syndrome in the crowd. The clip is bananas. If you see it.

[D]

Oh, the one he just dropped.

[B]

You were saying, yeah, there's a girl with down syndrome in the crowd. Then he's like, I know. I never had one of you at my show. He's like, you come a black guy, I'll reboot your system. He's like, oh, wow, okay. Bananas.

[E]

But the girl loved it.

[B]

She loved it. But he. But he does that. That's. Aries is good at that. He likes kind of talking, but it's all from love. He's not hate. But, like, I can't. That's not. It's not my style.

[C]

He's the one who does all the impersonations.

[B]

He's phenomenal. Yeah, Soprano.

[D]

Tony Soprano.

[B]

He can do. He can do anybody. He can do I. That guy is.

[E]

He is.

[B]

Is him. Jay Farrell. There's a couple of guys that can do anybody.

[C]

I mean, there a clip where he does like four rappers back to. Back to back.

[E]

Snoop, Snoop, Jay Z. Yeah.

[C]

There's a. Yeah, Tupac May. I don't know, four good ones.

[B]

No, he's got. But he. He's super talent. I never got into that one. That impression thing I couldn't do.

[C]

You mentioned you were into sports. Big time. Growing up. Were you a big hockey guy?

[B]

I always loved hockey, but I never. I never followed it to the. To the degree that I would say, like. Like I knew what I was talking about. But I always love to go. Like, if we ever got to go, I'd love to go. And I love to watch it. I just wasn't like, deep embedded in it. Like I was for basketball and baseball, for me were everything.

[C]

I.

[B]

We grew up. My dad's a die hard Cubs fan. We grew up die hard baseball.

[D]

Have you done first pitch there?

[B]

I did this last year. I did first pitch and I sang the Stretch, which to me, when the Cubs emailed me and were like, hey, we want you to sing the Stretch. First pitch. Insurance agents get to do that. That's not even a. But seeing the stretch, that was. To me, that's like. As a Chicago kid, it was like, Harry Carrey.

[E]

Didn't your dad say, like, oh, you finally made it.

[B]

You finally fucking made it? Yeah, literally. The email. I could show you, the email return says you finally fucking made it. I was like, well, dude, I mean, I've done television and film and the career is good. He's like, that's all bullshit. Singing the stretches legit.

[D]

Yeah, your dad sounds like, based on what you're saying last night at your show and to us at dinner, like, probably, like how you're so funny, right? I mean, the guy sounds like a complete.

[B]

He's a wealth of material, right?

[D]

Like, there's no way that you've come the way you have without some.

[B]

It's most of me making fun of him because he's. Dude, he called me this. This guy calls me this. He called me at like 9 in the morning and he. He's like, we just got back, you know, we got all of our tests done because they're old now. They're. They live at the doctor's office. And he's like, and the tests are all negative. And I was like, great. You know, that's great. And he goes, all right, all right, bye. I was like, all right, man, text me. I don't need you to call me at 9 with negative results. Like, because I'm thinking when he called, I thought, something's wrong. That's my first thought, you know? Know, it's funny because I said it last night. You become your parents. Parent. And that's how they would have thought of me. Like, if I called them, you know, at a weird time, my dad would have been like, what's wrong? Did you do. No. My dad. No, what's wrong? It was never. It was, what the did you do? Because my whole childhood, you know, it was always me getting in trouble. You guys were troublemakers. There's no way you weren't he bad.

[C]

He was probably the worst of us three. I was not great.

[B]

Constantly in trouble. I just didn't know how to avoid. I loved it.

[D]

Yo. It's the best.

[B]

It was just like, as soon as, like as soon as we could drive, I was like, dude, we can. We're gonna so much trouble. In high school, we used to. We used to. My buddy Tyler and I, we used to get stoned and when there was just like fresh snow. There was a field by my high school and my car was rear wheel drive. So we. We'd fucking get stone and shit and do donuts just for hours in that motherfucker. And the cops would come, we'd be ripped off our fucking heads, you know, and we're like, oh, sorry, sir. We just. We got lost. Like you got lost in the field at school? Yeah, we just took a wrong turn. We couldn't wait to do something stupid. I mean, dude, I was selling weed in school like a bozo. That was such a bad idea.

[D]

Studying for your act?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Studying for acts.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Study it hard. No, I didn't. You know what's so funny? I talked about that the other day. I didn't sell weed to make money. I sold weed so we could get free weed. I wasn't an entrepreneur. I, like, if I had any business brains, I would have tried to make money. I just did it so we could get high. It had nothing to do with, like turning a profit. I was probably the worst. I was probably losing money and still selling weed.

[E]

That was your crew of friends? Like the funniest kids in school. And was there one guy that. Because everyone has their one buddy at home that it's like, this dude is so funny.

[B]

I was probably that guy. I mean, I was probably the biggest goof ass. But, like, I had a lot of eclectic, interesting cats. I mean, for me, it was like I was a pothead, you know, I was a pothead who played sports. So, like, I would hang with a lot of the dudes and get high and do drugs, and then I would go do sports, too. So, like, these. I had two groups. I kind of touched a bunch of bases. Like, a lot of the guys I hang out with that would play sports, they. They drink, maybe that they didn't want to fuck with drugs, you know? And then the other guys I'd go dance with, if I wanted to go, really have some fun, you know what I mean? If I wanted to put something in.

[D]

My throat and disappear, which Santino are we getting today?

[B]

Yeah, well, honestly, though, because that was. In fact, dude, I quit sports my senior year. I quit basketball before drugs. I mean, I had a joke about it where I was like, once I found drugs, I was like, see you later. Basketball. I'm six one in white, dude. It ain't happening. You know? What did I. What did I want to do? D3.

[D]

I mean, by your senior year.

[B]

No, I wanted to party, dude.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Also, sports to me, was just something I loved. But I was like, I didn't want to commit to this. I didn't want to do it organized for the school. I just would rather play, like, a guy's league. Because I was like, what? I'm not going anywhere with this thing. Why am I. Wait. I'm not getting yelled at by a coach. I'd rather go have fun. Because I had no future in sports. It was just for fun. So for me, I was like, I still want to get high, party and do my thing. I'll just play a men's league if you go ymca. Yeah, dude. Way more fun than, like. Like, going to work out on their schedule. I didn't have a future. Guys that had a future. I was like, you gotta. You gotta get. Don't get high with me, dude. Go. Have. Go do the workouts. Because, you know, you're six' four in black. I'm six one and see through. I'm not going anywhere. Two points a game. You know what I mean? I was like, brother, this isn't happening. Yeah. Coming off. No, staying on the bench. Garbage time, dude. I got the bottom of the barrel. They'd be like, santino, get in there. There's six seconds left.

[A]

Left.

[B]

Inbound the ball, dribble it. You know what I mean? Like, I just. It Wasn't. It wasn't happening.

[D]

It's like when they let the ball boy come in, like, the last game of the year.

[B]

Yeah. The kid with down syndrome to go shoot one shot, and then he keeps missing, but they keep giving him the rebound. That was me.

[E]

Dude, you would have blocked that.

[B]

Yeah, I would have. Blow 100.

[A]

Dude.

[B]

They got to know what it feels like. You can't let them win all the time. No, I. Yeah, I g. I gave it up because I knew. And I played intramurals in high school, and, I mean, in college just because I loved it, but that's. I. I just knew in high school, I was like, I'm gonna do something in the creative world of, like, comedy or writing or. You know, even when I was in high school and I was filling out college applications, and they were like, what's your future? You know, what do you want to be? And all that. Even then I posted it one time that I even said, I want to be a comedian and a comedic actor in the creative comedic world of whatever, creating or writing or performing, I knew I wanted to do it.

[D]

Who was your, like, idol then?

[B]

Jim Carrey.

[D]

Oh, fuck.

[B]

Jim was like the God to me.

[D]

Was that In Living Color?

[B]

Yeah, dude. I used to sit in my mom's basement and watch. Me and my best friend Sean, we would sit and. And. And rewind the tape till it went dead for Dumb and Dumber. We'd rewind the scenes. We'd play them out to each other. I mean, I would. We'd watch that movie for, like, six hours straight, just, like, doing the scenes again. I was obsessed with him. It was crazy. And then, God, I don't even know how many years ago he became my boss. I did a show called I'm Dying Up Here on Showtime that was about the Comedy Store. It was kind of a drama, which. It was a little strange, but Jim was the executive producer, so I got to work with my. With my idol, which was really fucking mind blowing.

[D]

What happened? Like, he kind of, like, isn't in the scene anymore.

[C]

Right.

[D]

Didn't he get a little blackballed after?

[B]

I think he just kind of dis at some point. You're like, you.

[D]

He has so much money so big.

[B]

They either shoot you down or you leave on your accord. You know what I mean? It's like, he probably wanted to just, like, go chill. He had made all the money. All the fucking money.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

And so why not just go sit in Malibu and paint? He's a painter. He's, like, a phenomenal Painter.

[D]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. He just wants to go sit and paint, do his own thing. I think you get tired of this game.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And when you achieved so much like that guy did, you know, between, like, Dumb and Dumber, the Mask, Ace Ventura, and those are in a chunk. Liar, liar. And then you're talking after that, he did Eternal Sunshine and the Truman Show. And I mean, brother, his. His resume is. Is bananas. So he reached legendary status. It's either they start hating you, you, or you go, I'm gonna take a. I. I'd like. I'm gonna walk my dog. You know what I mean? Like, let me go live my life.

[C]

The one year I think he had the mask, East Ventura, and maybe one more where there were the three.

[B]

Yeah, they were back to. Back to.

[C]

Back in one year. Yeah. So like you said, one year.

[B]

It was. It was like a year. It was like a year and a half gap between them.

[C]

Yeah, he was the biggest thing. And, like, where do you go from there? And like you said, it's like, ra. You rather kind of say, hey, I'm in control of this, and I can walk away. I was gonna ask you. So you mentioned curb your enthusiasm.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You played a pretty big part in Little Dicky Show. Yeah, that were.

[B]

His manager.

[C]

His manager. That one. What was the. The most fun that you, like, had doing one of those shows? And do you. Are you able to kind of, like, write what you want to say or, you know, in.

[B]

In Curb. In Curb, Larry lets you do whatever you want, which is kind of rad. He gives you, like, a. The way you audition is, they give you, like, a character description. Right. Like, it would be like, you know, it would say, like, ex NHL player with a bad leg. That's all it would say. And then you'd have to make up, and you'd have to make up the whole narrative. And so you'd have to do with Larry, and they would give you kind of the idea of what he likes the scene to be, and then you fly. And the original character I was gonna do on that show.

Was, if you saw the episode, the guy who had the Dog named Adolf. Do you. I don't know if you remember that. Yeah, yeah. That was a guy. Yeah.

[E]

You love that show.

[B]

I first auditioned for that. That. Because I could speak a little bit of German when I was a kid in Chicago. I went to a school called La Salle. And you had to take a language as like, a kid. They mounted to do dual languages, so my mom put me in German like a lunatic.

[D]

You're like, Mom, Jesus.

[B]

I know, I know, I know.

[E]

This kid's gonna be.

[B]

She goes, I want. I don't want you to have any Jewish friends. So I. My God. So she put me in German and I knew a little bit. So I was doing it in the audition and Larry was loving it. And then the casting director, Allison Jones, brought me outside and she was like, you know, we like you. We want to put you on the show. Larry says, you don't look. You don't look Aryan, dude. You don't look like a. You know what I mean? They want like a blonde haired, blue eyed, like the stereotypical joke of like, Hitler's dream. The red hair thing is not going to sell them. And I was like, yeah, that's. I get it. And she's like, but no, he wants you to put something else. So he's building this thing. He's building a toilet at Latte Larry's. If you saw the series and they want you to be a plumber, you can play a plumber. Plumber. And I said, that's fine. So I went in there, I did the bit, he cracked a few times. I made him crack, which was awesome.

[E]

It's gonna be huge.

[B]

Yeah, I'll do. To change my life. The two people I made crack that, like, really made me feel something in the moment, like an improv was him and Julia. Louis Dreyfus. I auditioned like six times for that show and they never gave it to me, which is. Yeah. Which is nuts. Whatever. That guy.

[C]

Because you made it her crack.

[B]

I'm making her laugh was a great moment in my career because we were improving. And the joke was I was a new intern and the building was closing down, and I made up this whole scenario that someone had clogged the toilet. It overflowed, and shit's dripping through the vents. And the whole roundabout was at the very end admitting that I was the one, that it was my shit dripping through the vents. And she was cracking up about it. We were laughing. And after that, I thought I got that gig. And they called and they were like, no, I think that. I think they want to change the character. But when I.

[D]

But.

[B]

But I. But I think Julia's a genius. So making her laugh was great. And then making Larry crack.

[D]

Making Larry.

[E]

It's not like making Jimmy Fallon crack.

[B]

No, no, he has to. He doesn't have a choice, dude. Yeah, no, with Larry, he doesn't. He's. He doesn't want to laugh. Like, you know, you gotta. It's got to be great. Because his goal is to stay in the scene. He doesn't want to laugh. Like, that's gonna ruin, and he wants.

[D]

It, like, the more awkward, the better.

[B]

That 100. Yeah. So that was great. But then with Dave. Dave, you know, Dave let me fly pretty free on that show, you know, like, we had. I had lines, but the reason he hired me is because he liked me and was like, I want you to these.

[D]

Has he done stand up?

[B]

No, no, no, no. He's just, like. He was a rapper who's a. He's a comedic rap. You know, he's a comedian at heart. He really wanted to be a comic his whole life and. And loves rap and was great at rap. So, you know, that was kind of his path. But Dave let me fly as free as I've ever flown on anything, so he was great. I mean, I love. I love the kid, and I wish we did more, but we weren't gonna. It just wasn't gonna happen, you know? Like, I think FX wanted to do it one way, he wanted to do another way. Everyone started to break off. I went on tour. I just don't think it was gonna happen. You know, people to this day are like, when is it gonna come back?

[D]

I'm like, brother, that was a good show.

[B]

It was a fun show, man. It was fun to do.

[C]

Would you say that you've reached, like, the pinnacle in comedy? Like, you're one of the top dogs? And if. If not, like, what would you say, like, is one thing that you're looking to achieve?

[B]

I don't know, man. Like, I've done a lot of things that I feel like I really wanted to do. There's no, like, place I want to play. Do you know what I mean? There's no, like, doing this. I do the Chicago theater every year, and that's, for me, is like, I. Dude, I'm. I love it. Every year I go back, it's like the greatest moment at home. Everyone comes out, we throw a huge fucking party. To me, that's. That's. That's my. That's the thing. Like, for me, it was never like, I want to play the United center with the Bulls, but, like, arenas are cool, but. But my thing was, like, what in my career did have a piece of history and influence on what I did, and that's what I wanted, and I've done a lot of that stuff. I don't think I'm done, but, like, you know, I don't have, like, a lofty. I need to do this before I die. I just want to Keep making people laugh and touring around and having fun, growing. You know what I mean? But I don't. There's no. Like, I got to do that thing, you know? Like, I. I touched a lot of the things I always wanted to do already in my career, and I just to.

[E]

Wanted.

[B]

Want to continue on that. And then it's going to change, right? Who knows what the fuck this thing's going to be in a decade, you know? So we'll see. I mean, I don't know, but I've done a lot of the things that I kind of wanted to do. The only other thing I thought that I wanted to do was, you know, when I was younger, I wanted to do snl, and I tested for snl. It was me and my buddy Dan Soder. Shout out Dan Soder and Pete Davidson. And then Pete's the kid that got it. And I flew to New York to the audition, flew home. They called and they were like, lauren wants you to come back to New York and have lunch. And then my whole team was like, this is it, baby. You're gonna get it. And I flew back to New York. He makes you wait forever, you know, this whole game. He does. Then I sat in his office and we chatted. He was a very nice dude. I mean, I love the dude. I respect the fuck out of what he built. And he's the man. He was like, look, I think you're great. You're gonna have a great career, but you're not the puzzle piece I think I'm looking for, so to speak.

[D]

Dude, I didn't have to fly back for that 100%.

[B]

Could have called, you know, at the.

[C]

Aaron Rodgers.

[B]

Yeah, bro. Yeah, dude. Why the fuck did I fly here? But I mean, I respect the guy because he wanted to see me again. And I. And I. And I actually, I. And even in the time, I wasn't bitter about it because he. I was 30 years old. He was like, 19 or whatever the fuck he was when he got that show. He was a kid. I had already been on tv, so for me, it was like, I get it. I wasn't bitter at all. Like, me and Soder, I got why we were older than he wanted us to be. You know, the only reason Sodi and I were up for it is because he wanted, like, a guy's guy, a guy who, like, plays sports, drinks. He wanted, like, a Will Ferrell archetype. In his mind, he wants a guy again. And he went with Pete because Pete was young and malleable and cool, you know, What? I mean, he was like a cool kid for the youth. We were. We were just a little bit older in the middle. Yeah, it was just different. It was just a different time. And that show is built for young people. That show is not made for. That's why people in their 40s are like, that show sucks. It's like, yeah, it's for high school kids, man. Oh, it's not for us. Because you liked it the most when you were in high school.

[C]

But do you feel that when it was in its like, best days, though, it pertained to like also the 40 and 50 year old?

[B]

I think when it's even in its best days, it still always played to a younger audience. We just think about it differently because we get older and the show gets younger. Okay, but. But you know, like Farley days, you know, like, like those days, everyone did culturally like it. But that's because the culture of comedy was different than it is now. Like, my dad liked it.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

That's also because that what was going on in culture where like, like they would write sketches for everybody. Like, you know, my dad and I still, you know, we'll all quote. You know, everyone knows the Bears, everybody knows the super fans. But that's because it was a cultural thing. But now they write for young people because it's just the time. Times are different, you know. But I still respect this, the institution. I still loved it. That was the only thing that I thought would have been fun to do. But now, you know, I'm 42.

[C]

This might be a dumb question. Is there.

[B]

Yeah, maybe. Yeah, maybe.

[C]

Is there a more mature, like, sketch show show? Like, is there a difference?

[B]

No, it's not. And they do have sketches for. They're. They're not just talking to the youth, but I just think they angle for the youth. You know what I mean?

[E]

Like, it was a big yeti or like the Stanley.

[C]

Yeah. But is you think there's an opportunity where maybe like some of the older vets that were, you know, maybe even.

[B]

Like, I mean, Key and Peele did a great job of that when they. Their sketch show was definitely for not high school kids. I would argue like their. Theirs was for. In the 20s and 30s and a little bit up, you know, Chappelle show was probably the greatest sketch show that was ever created of all time. And that was for literally anybody.

[D]

That was.

[B]

That was literally for anybody crazy. That was for people that just wanted to laugh at something real world with the two white.

[D]

Oh, bro, get the. You actually told us last night you were Talking about whoever went after you, like, it was hard. You crushed it, you know, and, like, they're coming on after. We were saying, like, before you go, do you want the person in front of you to do well, or do you actually want them to do bad? And then it's easier for you. You were saying, I want them to give it their best.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

And then that time, you. Who else was with you but Chappelle was the last guy.

[B]

Chappelle. Chappelle loves to put people in front of him who. Who. Like, the last show that we did together that I went out to Dave's, I did the summer series out in Yellow Springs, and, you know, it was like me and Gillis and. And Derosa, and it was like. Like, he. He loves people to get out there and to smash, because he's such a confident legend that he's like, I don't give a fuck how good you do. I'm going to do better.

[D]

I'm still better than you.

[B]

Well, yeah, he's the guy. So, like, you know, it's cowardly to me when you bring people that are weak on the road and a lot of headliners do it, you know, and they bring people that, you know, that, you know, they're not going to do that good. So then you look better. I think that's bullshit, dude. I want to bring people that I think, think are phenomenal comics. You know what I mean? Because you want your game. Yeah, well, like, look, when you guys, when you're playing, you. The playing to the level of your competition is a fact. And in our world, it's playing to the level of your peers. If you're with shittier comics or you're with people that aren't as developed, you. You might not do as good, you know, like, it might set the tone in a different way. You want people to kill, like, you want. You want people to smash so that the room is hyped, and then they're prepared. Then you better bring your good shit. Yeah, it better work. But that's. That's the pressure. You need to be good, I think.

[D]

So Chappelle is.

[B]

He's got a. In the middle of the show.

[C]

Yeah, that's okay. That's why we got three of us, dude.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, that's fine. We don't need them, dude. Yeah, but Chappelle. Chappelle is. Dave is like one of the guys. You know, my respect level for Dave is. Is, you know, I can't articulate. I think he's one of the most generous, nice, cool, Guys at his level who could be a dick if he wanted to. Like, he's so big. He doesn't need to. Like, he doesn't need your adoration. He doesn't get a. You know what I mean? Like, he genuinely is a comedy fan who loves comics. He loves the world. And I think he's birthed something amazing out there in Yellow Springs. He lets people come out and play that club and play the field in the summer series, and he. And he makes a community. You know what I mean?

[C]

Is that in Ohio where he.

[B]

Yeah, Yellow Springs. It's. It's Columbus is, I think, the closest town. It's like an hour or something away. Something.

[C]

When he did the special where it was outside. What do you mean? What is the. What's.

[B]

In the summer series, he built, like, this pergola in a cornfield, and I don't know how many people it sits. Maybe a thousand, something like that, maybe a little bit more. And they literally built, like, an outdoor, like, amphitheater.

[C]

So it's his. Like, it's his Rogan's mothership type.

[B]

Yeah, but he also has an indoor club. He has the firehouse, which used to be a firehouse in Yellow Springs. He turned it into the club. But this he does in the summer. The summer series is outside. And we've done both. I played both, but it's. I don't know, dude. The guy wanted to make a community and bring great comics and put on a phenomenal show, and I think it's just rad. He supported and Rogan's the same way. That's why Joe built that club. He believes in the community of comedy, and he wants people to come grow and create their own world there and kill. And, you know, Joe likes that, too. Joe always put Joe. Joe always put hitters in front of him. So does Gillis. Gillis. Gillis, you know, put me and Tony Hinchcliffe into Rosa. We just did together. Like, the best comics always want good comics in front of. Of them. Yeah, that's a fact. Like, it just is.

[D]

You're starting lineup. Like last night, like, incredible jokes about Mexicans, about a black pilot. And for a while, like, it kind of changed a little bit where you just couldn't say things. Maybe I'm wrong, but now it's, like, switched back almost.

[B]

Well, it's almost like people were. I think, like. I think like, we never changed. Comics never changed. But, like, the perception of comedy changed because of the Internet. Got nervous about who was gonna be judging and all that stuff. And I don't think we've ever been restricted, ever. I've been the same comic I was from the beginning. The difference I think now is people. It's more them than us. We're not afraid to say shit. And comics say whatever they want all the time. A lot of them say real out of pocket shit. Yeah, but. But for the most part, it's more the idea that the crowds were afraid that if they liked it or laughed, were they doing something wrong. Like the Internet kind of did something to people, social meters, and they, they were like peeking, like, is that okay to talk about? It's like that's on them. Like, we, we're just there to like, talk about something that's happening and give levity to something either up or dark or weird or. And the crowds are the ones that shifted a little bit what you're talking about. But it's all come back because people have realized, like, that was, that was.

[C]

It was a weird time.

[B]

Well, Covid. People up crazy. Everyone got fired, and everyone was like, like panicking about the world ending. And so I think it did something to the society of comedy, but not to the comics. We were just. We were sitting in the foxhole doing the same, just waiting for it to happen again. You know, we're. That's all we're doing. But yeah, you. It was never. I don't believe in the. You can't say what you can or can't say. I've changed nothing. I've been the same guy. Every comic I know who's working, they're the same. They didn't gift. Because this.

[D]

There's just a moment there. Like, what.

[B]

It was a moment in time where I feel like the audiences, the crowds and the Internet were telling people one thing that wasn't really real. It's the same way I feel when somebody says, like, you know, people have their ideas and you guys probably know because you, when you tour, when you play, it's like you have your idea of a city and then sometimes you go play it. You go, damn, this is way better than I fucking thought. I think this. But I thought that place was gonna suck shit. Then you go, and the people are great. Fans are wonderful. They come out and see you. They're. They're, they're more in tune to your. To the comedy world than you thought. I mean, I think go. When you go meet the people, you realize the Internet is bullshit. You know, the perception of like, yo, that's a. That's a liberal place. And that's a. That's A Republican place. That's all bullshit, dude. There's Everybody's everywhere. And most people kind of feel the same, which is, you know, let everyone do your own thing. Leave me alone. I just trying to raise my kids and go to work, you know, like, most people are like a laugh. Yeah, leave me alone. We're just trying to have fun. I don't want to be judged.

[E]

The people that are talking shit online too, they're prob. Even the people coming out to watch you.

[B]

No, they're everyone that's sitting online doing their best to take, you know, to throw their negative opinions on everything. It's like every fucking. It's every sports journalist and critic and, you know, everyone that's got the biggest mouth probably does the. Did the least. You know what I mean? Like, the guys that probably talk the most shit probably contributed the least. And I've talked to a bunch of.

[C]

I can. I can attest to that. I just rip guys on this podcast. I was playing three minutes a game. I'm like, this guy's not a first line center, but I like when you get the 100 point mark again, when.

[B]

You get in fights. It's good though, when you start. You like to start, though. That's your thing.

[E]

Did you see the one.

[C]

What do you mean?

[E]

When he fought your cousins.

[B]

Well, you fought my cousins.

[E]

The Irish Travelers.

[B]

Oh, right. Yeah.

[C]

No, I was at Houston's and they were picking on the manager and then they boot my head in at the cvs.

[E]

Beat up five of them, though.

[C]

Yeah, I'll show you.

[B]

Got down five.

[C]

No, I. You'll. I'll show you the clip after.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Anyway, the Irish Travelers.

[C]

No, it was. I. We found out later on that these guys. It was like a bunch of drunk guys on a golf trip. So the video came out later. They were at a place earlier on the golf course and they were trying to close them up for last call, and then one of the guys like sucker punched the.

[D]

The.

[C]

One of the servers, a woman, she took shrapnel from it, but he ended up connecting with a guy. So she got it too. Whatever you want to call it. Assault. So they ended up coming over to. I think they ended up going over to Ruse Chris, and then they ended up at the Houston. And I'm. I just, you know, I. My. My favorite restaurant. Favorite restaurant. I eat there like four.

[B]

Guy loves Houston.

[C]

I love it.

[B]

Are you Houston's over Mastros?

[C]

Oh, yeah. Just because it's way less of an event, right?

[B]

I got.

[C]

Yeah, I don't need the lady playing the piano. I just want to go into Houston.

I don't need them, you know you do. Yes.

[B]

You go up to the piano, you give her a couple of bucks and go take a break. You don't want to hear attorneys go.

[E]

Hey, yeah, he's gonna come in.

[C]

Yeah, this 60 year old dude with the old no only fans model. He's gonna love that one. He's there to get his entertainment. But long story short, I always smoke a little bit of a J, go in, eat my food. And after I ordered, they're nine of them were surrounded. One of the managers and I mosey on over and I grabbed the guy's arm off him and I'm like, hey, you guys keep doing this, we're gonna have issues. And that the minute that left my mouth, I got. And then next thing you know, it was like the chicken and Peter Griffin going, yeah, but this is my favorite restaurant. So I was. Speaking of fights, I was gon ask you, we talked about how you don't go after the girls and sometimes it's funnier to make fun of the guys. What are the most intense situations that you found yourself in because there's alcohol in the mix. Oh, yeah, maybe other comedians stealing other comedians jokes where there's been.

[D]

Have you been stolen?

[B]

Yeah, I've never been stolen from. Ever. No, I've never been stolen from. But I have seen that. You know, the Comedy Store is home to some of the greatest fights of all time. I mean, really. Ari Shafir punched Bobby Lee in the face. Was probably one of the greatest.

[D]

Were you there for it?

[B]

No, dude, I wish. I wish I was. Yeah, because. Because Bob, because Ari's girlfriend was cheating on him with another guy that Bobby introduced her to and he got the gruff for it. So he sucker punched the fuck out of Bobby. I mean, dude, they didn't talk for years after that. But there's been. At that club, there's been. There's comics over the years, you'll have beef. But like, I never had like any guy from the audience ever charge the stage. But that's happened a lot to guys where they get into, you know, it's happened many times in that or where some drunk fuckhead doesn't like that. The comics making fun of him in front of his girlfriend, girl. And they charge the stage and they start a little baby war. I never had to deal with any of that. Like, for me, I never had it where I got into an argument with, you know, with someone and it turned that south because I Just. It's not my style. The only time I had a tough time I played a gig in Long island and is when I first started out, and the owner had all his, like, you know, guido fucking buddies, you know, yapping it up the whole time. I can say that, dude, I'm Italian, okay? You know, he had a bunch of wops at the table, and they were, you know, and they were there, you know, and I. And they talked to the host, they talked to the feature. I said to the guy, I was like, man, you got to get rid of these guys, man. They're fucking wasted, man. They're yelling. He's like, nah, they don't leave. You know, they were his people. They were like Long island locals. And then I went up there and I was like, now you're gonna talk the whole time. I'm just not gonna do my show. And I sat on the stool for, like 30 minutes, just like.

[D]

And they were. Just kept talking.

[B]

Yeah, Just having a cocktail. And the guy was like, that's the most unprofessional shit. I was like, you left those guys in the room. And the guy was like, you'll never come back. And I go, you know, I'll never come back here. And I haven't been back about that. Never go back.

[E]

That place and fire him.

[B]

Yeah, no, that. You know, that'd be. That would be rad. No, he just. The way he handled it sucked. And he said it was my, like, as if I did anything. I was a young comic trying to work, you know what I mean? Like, all making probably 1200 for the weekend of shows, you know what I mean? And that's a grind. That's the hardest 1200 you ever made.

[D]

You're staying right where the Coliseum was, too.

[C]

For sure.

[D]

That Mario bro. In the parking lot. Oh, bro, the war.

[B]

You're always. You're always facing a highway or a fucking saddest shit or a Pepsi machine or some bullshit outside of your room. You can hear the buzz of it. You know what I mean? Like, those. Those days were the. That's the tough because you got to do two shows Thursday, two shows Friday, two shows Saturday, and sometimes they make you do Sunday. So those was a grind, man. And you're eating shit. Those are, you know, quarter sold out rooms. Quarter sold rooms. Sometimes less, you know, they had to pay. We call it papering, which means giving away free tickets. So they paper the room rooms. And you're not making a. You're. You're making twelve hundred dollars. The hardest way you can make It. Which is a week there, plus you had to pay for your flights or try to get, you know, try to get driven somewhere if it was a drive. And then plus, you know, food in the hotel. I mean, you know, a lot of times you're cracking even on Mo on some of those.

[D]

Any of those times you're like, I'm not doing this.

[B]

No. I'm not even thought about quitting. No, Because. Because I would just. I would have a day job. I would have a gig to make money to pay rent. I wanted the job to make money in. Com. Comedy to be my life. And then, you know, then you learn. Then the. The levels start to change at some point. But no, there was no moment where I was like, fuck this. Because part of the suck is great. You know what I mean? Especially because when you're young, you know, you'll go out with locals, you know, you'll end up underneath a pool table in Missoula, Montana, after doing some whippets, you know what I mean? Like, there's some nights. I had some fucking great nights, you know what I mean, where you end up at some house party. Oh, bro. There were some wonderful nights on the road.

[C]

Road.

[B]

Like, it's part of the experience of the now. It's. That's what I said about before with young kids, young comics. I'm always like, enjoy this ride, brother. Because it doesn't like what I have they want, but what they have, I love. You know what I mean? Like, it was awesome because for me, now, I go to a nice hotel, we have a nice dinner, go to Houston's, crack one out, and then I go to the show, and then I go home. You know what I mean? Or we go out. What's my order of Houston? Yeah, I'm. I'm usually, I like a prime. I'm a big prime rib guy.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Salad biz.

[C]

Oh, the traditional salad with thousand.

[B]

Why don't they Houston's. Get your together. Name a salad after the kid I've been trying.

What's your. What's your salad?

[C]

What's in traditional salad? It just. That's the one on the menu.

[B]

But how do you make it biz worthy?

[D]

Oh, this could be an hour.

[C]

I get it.

[E]

Can I get a Caesar salad, but no Caesar dressing, no romaine. I want.

[A]

He.

[E]

He changes his. He's the.

[C]

I'm a bad order guy.

[B]

No, that's not a bad order. I imagine you tip well.

[C]

I do.

[E]

All right.

[B]

Yeah. Well, then. Oh, I do.

[C]

What do you mean?

[B]

Automatic space was insane. Yeah.

[C]

Automatic.

[B]

All right, well, you know what's funny is when we've talked about this, when.

[C]

You like literally on the nose.

[D]

I'm doing contract.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

All right.

[B]

When they know. When they know who you are, you got to tip more. Oh, yeah, we don't. We. We were the worst. Because like comp comics, when they know who you are, you better tip good. Okay. Like, you, you don't have a choice because you don't want to. Getting back that.

[C]

They're like, so what do you go? What do you go to? 25.

[B]

It's always Bill dependent. It's how big the bill was. Right. Like, but I. But you know, like, you can't have.

[C]

It's 100 bucks. You're throwing 30 on there.

[B]

If it's a hundred dollar bill, I'll probably. Yeah, you probably give 30 or 40 bucks. Yeah, cash. But I always do cash. I don't tip on the. The thing.

[E]

Oh, you do the cash.

[B]

Even though not. Well, that's old school. That's from my dad. Only because now they don't tax tips now. Right. Didn't. Didn't they change that law?

[D]

Trump changed.

[B]

Yeah, Trump did that. Yeah. No taxes on tips. You can get this tip for free.

[C]

I never thought we were going to get a Trump impression.

[B]

Yeah, you. You got one. You get this tip for free, little lady.

[D]

No.

[B]

Yeah, there's no tax.

[C]

Keep going. You can only do the rest of the pod and Trump, no problem.

[B]

Biz. I love you, Busy boy. Bus busyness.

[E]

Love Houston.

[C]

Have you met him?

[B]

I know. No. Well, no, I never met him, but I saw him get out of a helicopter at his golf course. He landed on the, on the seventh. On the seventh, like fairway green split down in Miami.

[D]

I got another one.

[B]

Yeah, dude. He landed in Miami. It was wild to watch. They brought. Brought in the choppers and it was. So we were playing golf.

[E]

He was president.

[B]

Did this happen? This was last year. We were playing golf. Golf. It was before the live event. Yeah, before the event. We were playing golf and I was out there with Fat Perez and Pat Perez. We were about. We were gonna film. We were. We were shooting like, setup stuff. And this one guy's like, get the off. Get the off. And I was like, you. We're supposed to be filming. Like, I'm talking, and then he starts to walk towards me. I'm like, there's a big.

[D]

He's got a weapon.

[B]

Yeah, it was a big. No, he's a big dude and all black and he's like, get the off now. And I Was like, whoa. And he's like, the president will be coming soon. Get off. And I was like, say less. I don't want to be choked out. You know what I mean? Like, this dude, because they. They have all these local. Do private security, then comes in Secret Secret Service, and then comes in his security that's also with him from the golf course. Like, he's got four levels of people that are like, the amount of people you see when he gets in there. It was. I. I could honestly. Maybe 100 new people.

[E]

People.

[B]

And it happened like that. It was like, whoa. What the. Like, you looked around coming out of the bushes, it sounds like.

[D]

I'm.

[B]

I'm joking. They literally come out of the bushes on the golf course, and they were like, down. Yeah, down. So we literally sat on the grass. We sat down.

[C]

See my ball?

[B]

Yeah. Is that a Titleist? Leave the Titleist if he's landing there.

[C]

Fluff it up a little bit.

[B]

Yeah. Give me a good life.

[E]

Played my course, Jordan's course. And Obama's been playing this while he wasn't even president. In their search, Secret Service everywhere. Oh, yeah, it's like, a tough place. They, like, Derald's at the Grove, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

But, like, just coming out of everywhere, you're like, holy. Like, their security is legit.

[B]

I heard a rumor. I'm not going to say the course because I don't want to get my buddy in trouble, but it's the only time that there was a group. There's like a big ball group, you know, like in the morning, like, all the boys go out, and it's like a huge. You know, it's like your team versus team versus that team. And it's got to be like six or seven foursomes. And Obama was playing this court course, and they played through, and I was like, that's the most gangster.

[D]

If you're playing through the president, that's. That's legit.

[B]

They were like, you know, he's like, oh, sorry, boys. And they were like, nah, brother, you gotta wait. I was like, that's insane.

[D]

I was playing his course.

[B]

Play through the president. Hey, you gotta watch this drive.

[D]

Obama played through us at West Palm and, like, the 17th hole, the tee box is, like, dead up a Hill, like, 30 yards. So all of a sudden, like, it's very clear. Like, everyone moves, moves. He just ripped his cart up the hill. Like, he. Like, the thing was ready to tip over. He parks it right on top of the hill next to the tee box, and then he's just off he just hits, and then, like, the ball's out there, and they just kick it into the fairway.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[D]

Knock it into the hole. We're watching. He's like, I shot 66.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I shot 17 under. Only missed one birdie, you know, so funny is like. They say that dude, he takes the regulator off. The golf carts go. His goes a little bit faster than everybody else's at all his course horses. So he can stay ahead of everybody. You can't. But it. I get it. If I'm that guy, you don't get in front of me. This is my course. You stay behind me.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know what I mean? Like, he's. He probably has to the point where he can turn on and off the carts, you know what I mean? To be like, wait. You know what I mean? Yeah. Shut this down. Shut him down.

[D]

The other images.

[B]

What color are you? You're a little dark. A little dark boy. Are you fully white? I only like you if you're fully white.

[E]

He's not.

[B]

Yeah. What are you, Biz?

[C]

I'm. My mom's half black.

[B]

That's the end of the show.

No wonder you were half late to this podcast.

[D]

Oh, no.

[C]

I was here before 5, though, Mr. Trump.

[B]

Oh, that's what they say.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Where were you Downstairs?

[C]

I was putting one in a.

Just like our buddy Santino would do, Mr. President.

[B]

I respect that. Santino. I love that little orange freak. I love that little boy. My little Cheeto puff. Love that guy.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. We. We saw him get out of the chopper, and I was like, holy, dude. It was. It was fascinating to watch him descend upon the golf course. And also that course. That Trump in Miami might be the hardest course I've ever played in my life. The Blue Monster. That's what it's called. Water everywhere, with wind traps everywhere. And there. And there isn't a short hole. I think the par threes were, like, 230. I was like, this is a. Fuck.

[A]

This is.

[C]

That's dumb.

[B]

It's. Well, dude, the pros. So we. I played that week with Fat Fat and Pat Perez.

Jon Rahm and I did one more, and all those guys. And these are the best in the world. And all those guys were like, this course is a. And I was like, if you're saying that I'm going to get eaten alive.

[C]

I'm glad we're talking about golf because you. You actually have a show as well.

[B]

Oh, yeah. No bad lies.

[C]

No bad lies. I've seen a few of your Guests. A random one. Ben Baller.

[B]

Yeah, Ben Baller. Well, Ben Baller, in the LA world of golf, everyone knows the guy, man, because he's around. He just really started to, like, get into golf, like, big time. I mean, like, that's all he does. He plays, like, four days a week. And it's funny, man, because he's one of those dudes. He's like, in la, everyone kind of knows him. And because of Bobby Lee, I'm, like, plugged in with the Asians. Yeah, they love me, dude. I've got the past, dude.

[C]

He's got, like. He's always blinged out, whether it's jewelry, whether it's the nice.

[B]

Did you see on the episode, he talked about Kanye tried to commission a swastika out of diamonds from him? We talked about it in the episode.

[C]

Right. I saw.

[B]

Kanye was like, I want a swastika full of diamonds. Diamonds. Ben Baller was like, no way. And I was like, I know a guy who's.

[A]

How much, though?

[B]

You know what I mean?

[C]

How much did he offer?

[B]

He didn't even. It wasn't even a number. He didn't even get around. But some guy made it. Some dude actually made it for him. Yeah, I have it. Kanye gave it to me. I've got it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Insane, though, dude. The guy wanted a diamond swastika.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I was like, brother, this guy. Well, somebody told me the other day, Kanye apologized to the Jews. Didn't he do that? What did he say?

[A]

Sorry.

[B]

Met with a rabbi there. That's fine.

[D]

He wore his chain.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

But you're doing. You do the. The voice of Bobby Lee's dad sometimes, too.

[B]

Oh, on the show all the time.

[D]

And that is so funny. And now you were telling us last night about your animation. Your.

[B]

We have an animated show, so.

[D]

And where you'll play his dad.

[B]

I will be playing his dad. Because he even says it. He's like, I do his dad better than he did his dad. But his dad, you know, his stories were. I never met the man. He died when. When, When. When we started the show. And I never met Bob's dad. They lived down in San Diego. I met his mom, but I never met his father. But, you know, his dad, he had a tough. It was tough for him. Like, his dad was a little, you know, I'm not. I don't want to speak out of turn, but his dad was a little bit tough of a father. Probably a little too, like, too many hands on. You know, too many hands on deck. And. And Bobby had A weird relationship with him where he loved him, but. But it was a lot of trauma. But his dad, you know, his dad was. You know, he's an immigrant that he said some choice shit to say. So, like, Bob would have guys over at the Hound house, and they'd be like, playing music, and he's like, are you gay? He's like, no. He's like, if you gay, I kill everybody. I'll kill all of your friends if you're gay. He's like, I'm not gay. He's like, if I find out you're gay, I murder you. Cold blood.

But he would say that, dude. That. His dad would say that.

Dead serious. This isn't. He's not doing it for a laugh. And Bobby's like, I'm not gay.

[E]

And he's like, kill his dog or something.

[C]

Something.

[B]

Oh, well, dude. Yeah, they just. Yeah, they let the dog go.

[C]

The dog. The dog story.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, the dog. He. His father was a dynamic personality. I mean, Bobby can tell all his dad's stories. I don't want to step on his toes. Why?

[C]

He came home one day and it was, like, served for dinner.

[B]

Oh, it was. Yeah, it was. Appetizer. It's a small dog.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Not a lot of meat on that thing, dude. Who. Stuffed with kimchi.

[C]

Oh, yeah, you gotta. Yeah, you gotta give stomach, right?

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Pickle it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

No, but he had such dark stories about his dad. So when we sold the animated show, which hopefully, you know, hopefully it's gonna. It's gonna come out.

[C]

Oh, we'll buy it.

[B]

Yeah, I'm hoping, dude. I'm hoping. And. And, yeah, the pitch was, you know, I play his dad because we loved it. That's. I play his dad's ghost on the show. So his dad is in an urn, and the urn talks to us, you know, and gives us advice. And in the pilot episode, his dad. I'm not going to give anything away. But his dad does. His dad is our. The pilot episode. We have to do something for his dad. Unfinished Business. Business is the name of the episode because he did something on earth and we've got to fix it now from the afterlife for his dead father.

[D]

And he's telling you.

[B]

And he tells us what to do. I can't. I don't want to blow it. I don't want to blow what it is.

[C]

Can you give us a few other.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. It's fun, though. It's fun. But like, that was that. That, you know, that was kind of the growth of the show was like. Because all these stories we had from high school, because high school was wild. Like, he was a great musician who was like a music nerd, comedy freak and. And was funny and goofy and crazy, but also got in a lot of trouble. Bob was a drug addict. You know, Bob's sober now, but when he was in high school, I mean, he was smoking crack. I mean, he. I mean, he would do anything that kid would do. Any. When I've seen him relapse, I mean.

[D]

Holy shit, it's a miracle he's alive. Almost.

[B]

Yeah, dude. I put him in rehab twice, and we're never gonna do it again. I hope in my heart, because I love him so. I care about him so much. But when he was in high school, he can't. You know, I think a lot of the trauma he suffered, he started doing a lot of drugs, and he loved to get just gone.

[C]

And, you know, what would Bobby's dad say about the drug use? That he. Was he aware of it?

[B]

Well, yeah, but you know, what's so funny is, like, it. I think he. I think his dad spoke with his hands. I think his dad spoke with his hands about drugs. You know what I mean? It wasn't like a, you're in trouble now. You know what I mean? It wasn't that, like, you know, I think he got. I think he got the worst end of it all. Like, with my parents, it was like when they caught me smoking weed for like, the 50th time. Time, you know, my mom was like, you're gonna grow up to be a nothing if you continue on this path. Look at me now.

[C]

You still smoke?

[B]

Yeah, I like to get high, but I don't get high like I used to. I mean, I, I.

[D]

Before you perform, never.

[B]

No, no, not before I perform.

[C]

We talked a little sass, you know? Little sass.

[B]

Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

He's. He's funny guy. Yeah. Francis. We sat down with son of a Boy dad, and he was talking about how early in his career. Career he would, like, have seltzers before he would go up. So I don't know if. When you started.

[B]

Oh, I always have a. I like that. A cocktail doesn't mean. I mean, you know, I could. That's nothing for me. That's kind of. I'm Irish.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's a part of it. Like, I can have a cocktail on stage or not. It doesn't really matter to me. So it depends on the day and if I'm feeling it. But, like, I used to work out Shows, and I would smoke a joint and workout shows. But now I like to get high at night to level right. I don't want to. Yeah, I love. I love to get high and. Right. But I'd rather get high when I'm. No work. When. When I'm like. Like, it's. That's like my glass of wine for an old white woman in the suburbs, you know? Like, I want to smoke a joint, play with a dog, watch, you know, watch sports, and then peel off the bed. I don't want to, like, get high and then go work. That's kind of the opposite for me. I used to be that way. I mean, dude, I started smoking when I was 15 years old, and, you know, I've operated high all day long. That's all I did, you know? And then until I was about 33, 34, I started to be like, all right, man, let me use it as, like, a day, as my little treat, you know? So at night, I'll get.

[D]

I'm not waking up and smoking anymore.

[B]

No, no, no. Because I just. I got to do, man. I mean, you know, some guys can do it, dude. There's a lot of guys that. That's how they live. But I just feel like I. For me, it's like, nah, man, I got employees. I got responsibilities. Like, for me, it's like, when I get home. Also, there's nothing better than smoking a joint and taking my dog for a walk is, like, good. Dog walking is my.

[C]

I wish I could do that.

[D]

Dog walkers.

[B]

We heard about it last night at dinner.

[A]

Dogs.

[C]

Oh, you guys. You guys were talking about my dog.

[B]

Yeah, we heard about it.

[C]

Get the out. How did my dog come up at dinner?

[B]

How did that even come up?

[C]

This guy. That's all he wants to talk about, Yance. That's all you want to talk about is how my ex.

[B]

No, he didn't bring it up.

[D]

I wouldn't bring it up.

[B]

Well, I definitely didn't bring it up.

[D]

It was probably his friend he brought that had heard Yance talking about.

[E]

Yeah, I think it was.

[D]

He's like, dude, is that.

[B]

Oh, yeah, that is probably true. My buddy who's with us.

[E]

Yeah, he's a big fan of the podcast.

[B]

Yeah, actually, that's probably who. What it was like, that's the guy. He was really heartbroken. He didn't come over and say he was pissed. He was not happy.

[C]

Yeah, I was kind of in the big dog mood last night.

[D]

That's your one dog you got left.

[C]

Yeah, they'll actually. I had One. Yeah, I've had a few and got them taken.

[D]

When you do the show with Bobby, like.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Is there any outline? There's nothing. Like.

[B]

Yeah, no. So we. We do. Not for him. I mean, for me, we do a lot of pre prep with the producers over, like, what we're gonna do, depending on, like, what the episodes are. But I mean, a lot of times there's days where we want to fly free. Like we know what we're going to be talking about, or we'll set up a theme for the show.

[D]

Show.

[B]

Especially if they have like scene readings or bits that we want to do and all that stuff. But a lot of times we don't even get to it because Bob doesn't want to do it. Not that it's like we're. If we're cruising and we're having fun, we just never get around to it, you know, like. But that's kind of the beauty of that show. It was always that way. We would set up a bunch of shit, and if we didn't get to it, we didn't fucking get to it.

[D]

Free for all.

[B]

Yeah, sometimes. Because if him and I are humming, forget about it.

[D]

That's. That's the goal.

[B]

Oh, man. If we're in the groove, it's like, there's nothing better when I'm saying stuff. There's times when I. I'm like, damn, dude, this is wild. Like, because we're bouncing really well. He's my. He is like my ultimate comedy counterpart. I've never. I've never met someone in the business that I bounce with like that. Not even fucking close.

[C]

That's the best that you found him, right?

[B]

Yeah. I mean, it was kind of gifted to us. We was right under our nose. I said that last night. You know, his ex girlfriend, Kalila, credit to her, she was like, you guys should do the show together. Because I would guest host and we would crush. And she was like, why don't you guys do the show? And I was like, I don't want to step on toes, man. You have your show. I'm doing my. It's. I don't want to. I didn't want to, like, start beef. And for it to be like, oh, you're going to do that show now, you know? And she was the one that was like, you should. There's no reason you guys shouldn't. So credit to her, for real. She was great. And she was instrumental in that beginning. And then when. When we did that first episode, man, I knew I said that last night to you guys, I was like, that's it.

[C]

We got something here.

[B]

Fun. Well, because we were, we always were. We all. We would fight in real life. So we'd fight on the show carving each other.

[C]

Yeah, I feel like us, like we, we keep each other honest. And I have to. I always also don't mind being on. Like, we got a. We got a sandbagger coming out with Paige Sprenak and we were watching. Or a Sporanic. I always her name up and Pasha was editing it and these guys are just grilling me the entire time. And I'm la. I'm laughing my dick off.

[B]

Did you beat her, by the way?

[E]

You can't take it.

[B]

Oh, yeah. You can't say it's not out.

[C]

Yeah, it's not out.

[D]

I was insane match.

[C]

I was partner.

[B]

Good match.

[C]

Yeah, it was a great match. I was partners with her. But you kind of touched on the Bobby stuff. Like, like the darker side of comedy. Like, is it like. I mean, I don't know if you've ever dealt with stuff. It seems like there's just so many highs and lows for industry that.

[B]

Well, I mean, the worst. I think you kind of pull from some. I mean, everyone. I don't think you need to have a dark upbringing to like make good comedy. But I think most of my friends do. I mean, you know, like when I was a kid, you know, I think a lot of my bullshit or my view on the world comes from, you know, my, my, you know, I had this. I had two worlds. I had this Irish side of my family. My mom's side, as she's one of 10 kids. And my grandfather was a firefighter and that was. Was this blue collar working world that I came from. And then my dad, my biological father, who's kind of a hustler and was a contractor and his dad was a gambling addict who lived at the. Literally worked and lived at the dog track and at the horse track in Chicago. And that was this different, completely different world. And my father went to prison when I was a kid, so he was in and out of jail when I was a kid. Was into drug addict, was a drug. I mean, he's clean and sober now, but, you know, it was a definite was. My world was very odd as a kid. My parents got divorced when I was one, so my view was a little skewed of like, what was normal. I used to ask people, I was like, I want a house on the ground. I used to say that all the time. I was jealous. If you lived on the ground. Because we lived in apartments my whole life. So I was like, man, one day I'm gonna get a fucking house on the ground. And then my mom found my dad, my stepdad, who really raised me, and, you know, moved my mom out to the suburbs and my life changed again then, you know. But when I was a kid, I, I definitely had a chip on my shoulder because my old man wasn't around, you know, I mean, I, I, I don't carry it with me like I used to, but, yeah, it probably prompted the reason that I got kicked out of a couple of schools for being a. I was fighting, you know, I love.

[D]

I just hit the world a little.

[B]

I was just mad. Yeah, I couldn't wait.

I have a younger sister, but she's from my mom and my stepdad, but she's nine years young, so the difference, the gap was huge. I was out of college before she got to high school, so she was always my baby sister. I mean, I love, we're. That's my homie now, but she was my baby. You know what I mean? Like, it was hard to see her as a sibling because I, I used to hold her and she had a. I think it was called a nebulizer I used to have to give her because her lungs, there was something with her lungs. I used to have to hold her and give her oxygen at night, you know. So, like, for her, it was different. For me, my relationship wasn't like a niece almost. Well, yeah, we got, we did, we got there when she got older. But for the most part, it was, you know, that was my baby sister.

[C]

Mix all that in. Like, you're talking about, like, the past for some of these comedians, or if not most of. Along with the highs and lows of, like, having to go out there and maybe bombing and just so it feels like not only with your past along with the industry, it could make for some heavy, heavy up.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I mean, look, dude, you, it, you either. You, it either it either makes you or it breaks you. Like, I've seen it do both things. I've seen a lot of guys.

[D]

You've probably seen some pretty talented guys that.

[B]

So many that didn't make it to so many. I've seen so many guys. I've also seen a lot of guys make it and then get in their own way and fuck up their opportunity. Opportunities. Yeah, because they, they, you know, you.

[A]

Rest on your maybe seeing sports, too.

[B]

I was gonna say, you guys have to see that in the league. You have to see guys that think they're the. That they've gotten a little bit of the taste and then they get passed by because everyone else is putting in the work, you know, like, yep, It's. It's just so you know, that Rick Ross line is one of my favorite lines when he was Kobe, you know, Kobe's about to lose 150M's shooting in the gym. That's my favorite line.

[C]

That was. Was that Drake who said that? And I believe Drake had to apologize.

[B]

Wait, that wasn' Ross that said that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you wasn't with me shooting in the gym.

[C]

I was like, he was a different line.

[B]

I just love that world of like, yeah, dude, you. And it's not even a comment about the. That relationship. I'm saying that clicked to me of like, whenever somebody says something like, ah, you just. You popped out of nowhere. It's like, dude, you weren't with me in the gym. You're crazy. Yeah, it's the same thing. I talked to. I was with a buddy two weeks ago, a pro athlete, an X ball player. And I said the difference between us because he was doing a similar comparison of like, he want to know more about our world. I was asking about baseball and he said, he's like, but then why is it, why is it that people feel like, you know, they can do what you do? I said, because they can. They know they physically can't do what you do. Like every knows they can't physically do what you guys do. They just do. If you ever fucking got on the ice, you know you can't do what you guys do. But with us, they can see us on a stage and they go, I tell a couple of jokes at work. I can fart into a microphone. So like, ours just looks so easy. But they don't know what the workouts are. With you guys, it doesn't even matter what the workouts are. They know they can't do. They just know they can't do that. So they. They put us in this weird category as a professional sometimes where they're like, I can be funny. Like, the fuck you can. Because you've got to put. Put in 10,000 hours at shitty little clubs, at gunning and running, and constantly writing and move and taking hits and taking losses. You're taking so many Ls when you begin your career. And so unless someone's in the gym with you and the only other people in the gym are other comics, you don't. They don't.

[C]

Is there one, one guy that you would say was like the natural who maybe didn't have to go through that type of grind. Who made it to the top?

[B]

No, because anybody that's good did the grind, right? Chappelle was 16 years old, and he was doing comedy when he started, but he still put in those work. He put in all that work.

[E]

He was, like, flying up to D.C.

[B]

Yeah, when he was a kid, dude. When he was. When he was a high school kid, but he still put in the work. He was still grinding in New York. Like, I don't think there was a story of that. He made it overnight. Now he's a superstar.

[D]

Like a freak athlete.

[E]

Matt, right?

[C]

Yeah.

A couple years. Didn't really have to grind that hard. Next thing you know, he's like, you.

[B]

Know, it never lasts. How about that? If that does happen, it never lasts.

[E]

But.

[B]

But rife, dude, rife. Put in the work. That kid. That's another thing. He was in the gym. People don't know that. I met that kid out here when he was a kid. Dude, he was a kid. He came around the Laugh Factory and, you know, young baby face kid, and sweet. Just the sweetest, nicest kid. And was working, dude, that kid worked. But people saw he blew up on the Internet, and they're like, oh, man. Rife, sliding. It's like, nah, brother. That kid work.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Now, whether or not you like his whole different story, like, if you don't like crowd work or you don't like the way he performs, fine. But that kid put in work. I mean, I don't know. Like, Gill put. Put in crazy work, you know, Gillis blew up in the last five years, and people are like, this guy came out of nowhere. It's like, no, motherfucker. He was. He was. He was eating it. Like, we all ate it. Grinding, grinding, grinding until finally he could shine, you know? So I can't name one person that, like, was given the. The free key or that happens in, like, acting. Like, you know, they'll give some dickhead a role that's never done shit, and they explode. But that's that world's bullshit anyway.

[D]

What about, like, seeing talent?

[E]

Where.

[C]

Where.

[D]

You know, all of us have seen a. Like, first time I saw Crosby, it's like something's different there. Have you ever seen anyone that you're like, oh, this kid's unbelievable?

[B]

Oh, yeah. I mean, you see that tell.

[D]

Right?

[B]

When you're young, you can. When we're all young, we kind of know. We don't know who's going to be a star, but you know, who's like got the, you can feel it. You can just feel it. Like when you guys would see someone that you're playing with, you go this good dude. If they have. They had got that extra step, you know, like there was guys like that that I, you, I always kind of knew, you know, like, you know, a guy like Bargotti's massive. Nate always kind of had. Nate was always very talented and you could tell he was very smart and he knew where he was going. Sebastian Maniscalco was a guy like, even when he was grinding, you knew he had something very special. I, I, you can't really thumb it, but you're like, these guys are good. These, these guys are undoubtedly good. You know.

[D]

What's he making a year?

[C]

Yeah, what are the top.

[B]

They released it. So I'm not talking out of two return, but I think Nate last year made 80 million. It said 86 million or something.

[C]

He's the highest paid actor.

Excuse me.

[B]

Well, here's why though.

[D]

Nate swear?

[B]

No, no, no. He's clean as a whistle, buddy. He does a matinee show. He'll do like a 4pm show because you could bring your, you could bring your aunt and your kids to his show. It's all ages, so he'll do. The reason he makes the most money right now is because he is doing sometimes three arena shows because he can do a 4, 6 and 9. You know what I mean?

[E]

Mean.

[B]

So most guys like, like Gillis, you know, it's probably an 18 year older show, maybe 21, but probably 18. And you know, you're doing one arena show a night now. Could Shane sell more? Fuck yeah, he could sell more. Shane could. Shane can sell. He's doing like three gardens or four gardens back to back to back. But you know, Nate can play for a wider audience, right? Like Nate can do you, you could, I can bring my aunt who's, you know, who's like. Does not the word shit. She's like, oh my God. God. You know, like you can bring her to nature because he's not dirty, you.

[D]

Know, so hard to be funny like that, I think.

[B]

Oh, he, he. Let me tell you something. He's, he's found his way to do it in a way that's, I mean, it's. Proof is in the pudding. The guy is killing it. Like he's found his audience and he's cruising.

[C]

So who's the Matiscalco guy?

[B]

Sebastian? Yeah, yeah, he's an Italian kid. He's from Chicago. Yeah, A lot of guys.

[E]

Chicago, Chicago puts out Monsters.

[B]

Dion Cole is one of the funniest guys on planet. Yeah. Chicago for years has always been. Well, a lot of those guys, and a lot of guys too move to Chicago, right? Like Tina Fey and Will Ferrell and all these guys. They like moved to Chicago to do Second City. But that's sketch and improv. But stand up wise. Yes, Stand up Chicago's had some phenomenal stand up comics, but it's a. It's always been kind of like a good gut of comedy because Chicago is. It's like, it's a good piece of the, of the East Coast. Even though it's not the east coast, they think we are out here. These fucking goofballs in California. Like, will you go back to the East Coast? I'm like, Chicago's not. That's not on the coast, buddy. But they think water. Everyone out here is a moron. But Chicago is like the best nugget from the east coast and from the Midwest. It's like, it's a Midwest city. So. Hi, how you doing? But it's Chicago. So it's got like a gritty. Yeah, it's, it's dirty. It's, it's. We come from gangsters and crooked politicians, so naturally the city. The city's gonna be crooked as fuck. I mean, you know, they're sweet people, but, you know, they're. They're a little fucking shaky. And we got great gang violence. We're number, number one. Nobody beats us. We're the best, dude. Shyrak. We're number one.

[C]

You got a voice for that.

[B]

Get shot, get robbed, get shot. Dude, I don't. Don't wear a. Watch out in the streets.

[E]

No.

[B]

No way. Huh? No, that ain't fake, dude. I can, I can see it from here. Don't do that. I see the reference number on that thing.

[C]

Man, this has been unbelievable. I hope we get to do it again. I hope we get.

[B]

Boys, we're gonna play golf. We know we got by la, but we're gonna, we're gonna get it together, I promise. We're gonna play a little golf together. But who's the match going to be? Have we decided?

[C]

I think you're going to get stuck with me.

[B]

No, that's not stuck.

[E]

Well, you bring two other guys attitude.

[B]

That we want to have when we get out there.

[E]

Bring two guys.

[D]

Three. Or you play with Biz and play me and Keith.

[C]

Is Bobby Lee good?

[B]

Oh, I want to play with Biz. Then I want to play. You got me and Biz. How about this? I'll Bring. This will be fun. What if I bring one guy as a, like, rogue, and you guys get to decide how many celebrity shots he gets?

[C]

I love that.

[B]

Is that a good idea?

[C]

If it's Bobby Lee, I'll.

[B]

Well, no, we don't want those shots, buddy. That's not going to fucking. That guy jeans. At the golf course, he wore jeans with Bryson DeChambeau.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

He called him.

[E]

He called him.

[B]

He called him Bison six times. I go, that's not his name. He goes, I thought that was like, a nickname. Bison. I go, no, his real name is Bryson. He thought, like, Bison was like, a nickname because he's a big boy. He goes, he was Bison. Bison.

[E]

Come here.

[B]

And I go, dude, stop doing that. Bryson loved it.

[E]

Did he?

[B]

Oh, dude. Bryson ate it up. Because Bobby is a fun little toy.

[C]

He could do whatever he wants. And so people are going to.

[B]

He picked him up and he walked him up, whole six. He put him on his shoulders.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

And at some point, Bobby was like, put me down. He wouldn't put him down.

[D]

All right, we got rollback. Last question. Use code chicklets on rollback.com. 20% off your first purchase to the end of the week. That C H I C L E T S on R, H O b a c k dot com. 20% off. Polos, shorts, hoodies, and more. We've talked about our white whale guests, like kind of Joe Thornton. Right now. We have many others for Chiclets. Do you guys have one on bad friends?

[B]

Ooh, that's. That's a good question. We just did Louis ck. We put out Louie, which to me is. He's like the greatest of all time. I mean, he's up there. You know, he's one of them. I should say. There's no one.

[C]

But has he been chilling out lately because of everything that. Or is he kind of.

[B]

No, he's back. He's. Dude, he's just. He's selling. He's on tour doing his thing. I think he's. You know, he put out a special after everything had happened, and I think he's. He's. He's back in the world of, like. He's put in the work to go. I don't know what else you want me to do. You know, I'm trying to change my life for the better and come watch me.

[D]

Or don't.

[B]

Yeah, he doesn't even talk about any of that stuff. I mean, that's in the. That's in his rear view now. But, I mean, he's. Louie was to me. Because I admire him so fucking much. He was phenomenal to have on the show. But I think, like, oh, man. Who would be, like, the ultimate to get on the show? I mean, we've tried to put it. We put it out for Eddie Murphy multiple times. Because I. I think he's.

[C]

He's starting to. I think he did something.

[D]

There's a documentary right now. Yeah.

[C]

I feel like some of these guys, they were so big, and they don't mind coming back around at all a certain point.

[B]

He would be a guy I would kill to have. I don't think he would ever do. I don't. I don't ever see him on a podcast. I mean, he did Seinfeld's Comedians in Cars, but that's his buddy, you know what I mean?

[C]

Like, I was. But I was also shocked to see Leonardo DiCaprio do a podcast. Mind you, it was that New Heights one.

[B]

Yeah, it was Travis and. Yeah, yeah, Leo, like, those kind of guys. Like, that's no disrespect. I just. That's not my white. Mine are like, yeah, comedy legends. Yeah. Like, I would do Eddie.

[C]

So, like, I could have never seen Leo doing a pod, but yet, you.

[B]

Know, Or I'd want Gary Busey. I want someone who's unhinged as, you know, mean, you know, who tried to get on our show multiple times. He. He. He kept DMing me was Antonio Brown.

[C]

Oh.

[D]

Oh, God.

[B]

Yo. He's like, let me on the show. Make it happen. And then sure enough, you know, and we were like, I don't know if this is a good idea, man. That guy's always caught up in some. He just got extradited and arrested, right?

[D]

Yeah. He's wanted for murder, I believe, or attempted murder.

[C]

That was real?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

After it came out, he was in Dubai. I'm like, posting, and I'm like, how is this? Is that not a thing?

[B]

Oh, brother.

[C]

You never. You never know what's real or not. Damn. He's in one now.

[B]

Oh, he's. Dude, if you saw that video, him resort, like, flopping his wiener out of the pool. Everything I ever heard, I was like, I believe it now. Like, whatever the rumors are, he was, like, in a pool at a. At a resort. I don't know where it was, but he's got his penis. He's pretending like it's a whale. Like, bro, like, breaching the water.

[D]

He's like.

[B]

And he's smacking me.

[C]

Resort.

[B]

He's just going off, man.

[F]

These kids.

[B]

His kids. Yeah, yeah. He was at Atlantis in the Bahamas. He's losing his mind, dude.

[D]

Oh, buddy, this is awesome.

[C]

Thank you.

[D]

Boys will be great.

[B]

Can't wait to do it.

[C]

You're a funny.

[B]

Thank you, man.

[D]

So thanks for the tickets last night.

[B]

And of course, my pleasure catching up with you. My pleasure. We'll see you guys soon.

[D]

Guys, let's take a minute here and talk about Noble. This episode is brought to you by Noble. Noble is a footwear brand for training and for daily life built to support you in your pursuit of physical, mental and emotional strength. Biz wears it everywhere. He looks great in it too. Good looking shoe that feels even better on your your foot. No Bull celebrates a no bullshit approach to wellness. They've got options across lifestyle and training and they are the best shoe for anyone who wants to be a better version of themselves. Plus, Noble is now the official training shoe of the NHL. Exclusively for Spit and Chiclets listeners. No Bull is offering 40% off your order. 40%. Visit www.nobleproject.com Chicken Chiclets for 40 off your entire order. That's www.n o b u l l p r O-J-E-C-T.com backslash Chiclets for 40 off of the official training shoe of the National Hockey League.

Thank you very much to the man, Andrew Santino. Appreciate him sitting down with us. And the sandbagger has dropped biz and it's humming right now. Now I believe it's double the numbers through an hour that the Bruins one was. I think I know there's someone, someone who has something to do with that. And we want to shout out Pasha and the entire crew that helped out. Pasha took a lot of heat on the Bruins one for his AI usage. Very funny in this one where she shows the snake and puts in that. That was not AI, that was a real snake. Topasha crushes it with those. He's getting better and better. Give him some love everyone. Don't be dog so hard.

[E]

Yeah, it only him nine months to put these out too. So like it really, really be happy.

[C]

Show me a better produced golf video on the Internet. Well, I. I guess other than the Internet invitational. But he puts a little bit of love into these. That's why they take so much longer.

[E]

Scorsese movie.

[C]

Do you pause it? Do you want to defend yourself as to why these are taking so long to edit?

[E]

It's cuz he's playing tummy sticks with his girlfriend.

[B]

Well, I just want to say that.

[A]

Like other pods like Foreplay, they have three dedicated editors for these videos. And meanwhile, I have to produce games, game notes.

[B]

We do two pods a week.

[A]

That's a few hours per day.

[B]

I'm doing other shoots with biz.

[E]

Like, 90 of the people listening to this right now, working three jobs just to, like, you know, no one's listening.

[C]

Listen to imposter.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Yes. Has no idea what goes in on the back end of these things, so.

[A]

I don't take his years.

Into it.

[C]

And he's. And he's being a little on the edits too. Oh, I can't have this. I have a family. I can't have it. I don't want to lose my dog.

[E]

Dogs.

[C]

Dogs. Pasha, we love you, buddy. I love all the AI you threw in this one. So much for our pod and our brand, buddy. And although people hate your devil takes, they love the way that you.

[A]

No, I did not.

[C]

No, that's blood pressure from Yanza's text last night. I told you to take this out.

[D]

That's blood pressure. That's.

[E]

But actually.

[D]

The devil's pulled the it out.

[C]

All right.

[B]

Appreciate love, boys.

[D]

Yeah, love you.

[E]

No, love.

[C]

Yans is mad right now.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I'm gonna punch you in the face through this.

[C]

Why you? You're.

[E]

I asked for one thing, dude. I asked for one thing.

[C]

But yet. But you texted him and you didn't ask for the thing. You said the wrong thing. So that was on you?

[D]

I don't know, the text was kind of clear, I thought.

[C]

Oh, yeah, read it.

[E]

No, we don't need to talk about it. Just fucking go to the next segment. Bring in Ra.

[A]

I gotta leave.

[C]

Look at how mad this guy gets. He fucking abused me for 90 minutes during that.

[D]

You can say whatever you want to me.

[E]

You can say whatever you want to. Fucking Paige. I just don't want to be involved in your bullshit. I have fucking teenage daughters, you idiot.

[D]

Him. I don't think he'd be saying a word. It wasn't you that's coming. Coming out.

[C]

Backing off a ball is not the. Like. Like, what are you talking about?

[D]

Let's bring in Ra's world.

[C]

Wait, no, you can't.

[D]

You can't.

[A]

Hello, everybody. Welcome.

[D]

Amazing. Sorry.

[A]

Here on the spit. That's right here in the Spitting Chickens podcast. Holy y. I don't think I've ever seen you in that mad before.

[E]

All right, well, it's like.

[D]

Have you been listening to the whole show?

[A]

Yes.

[D]

What happened back in the day when a kid puked wood chips?

[A]

I mean, I have. I was in custody back in the 70s, but. Yeah, you.

[C]

I mean, you were a janitor when we started this podcast.

[A]

Yeah, well, custodian, same. Same thing. I. You'd put sawdust down typically, or you just mop it up. And by the way, Keith Custis, make the world run after teachers. They are the most essential part of a school. And I'm not saying that because they did it. When you do that job, you realize they really make the world go around. Every building, every place, people clean that up. And it's a job that, you know, teaches you, you know, some life lessons and no regrets that I did it for many years.

[C]

Shout out to the custodians and the teachers.

[A]

All right, there you go. Biz. We were just talking about heated rivalry. I think it was a week or so ago I called the Hunting Wives the horniest show on TV so far this year. Well, it just got bumped down a number two because of heated rivalry. Our podcast brothers at what Chaos, Pete Blackburn and DJ Bean, they've been pumping the tires on this thing hardcore. No pun intended. So, yeah, I gave it a whirl. I like to watch shows and yes. Excuse me, it's very graphic and whatever. I don't. I don't. I could watch anything. Not in phases, man. I used to watch Faces of Death as a kid, but it makes Brokeback Mountain look like. Like a Disney movie. And it's. It's hilarious in one regard, but it also kind of like, you know, gives you like some in depth look at like, obviously there's been gay players in the NHL. We don't, you know, unfortunately, we haven't had an out player. But.

Well, he's not Luke.

[C]

Pro cop drafted to the NHL.

[A]

Right. But he. But he hasn't been there yet. But saying, you know, exactly. He's a. He's a. He's a great guy, but it kind of presents that side too. But man, man, it's haughty as. And I'll tell you, man, I wish I had that Russian's ass. I left my ass in the womb. He got the absolute peach emoji biz. Wow.

[C]

Okay, okay, okay.

[D]

They show hog.

[A]

There's one screenshot of like, you know, he gets sexted. And you can see it briefly, but no, not typically. Like I said, it's grab. It would be what you. I. I guess you might call soft. Softcore and Cinemax back in the. The day. But yeah, whatever. I mean, whatever. Maybe not.

[C]

You ever watch like Jean Simmons wife on those baby blue two channels, like she used to do the. The softcore. Like, did you ever see that, that.

[A]

Well, I mean, I worked out my oldest video start in the 80s, so I, I, I was a few levels above.

[C]

So, like, in the day, would you see a guy like, like the, his backside giving it to another guy, like, how much?

[A]

Yes, it's, it's is like. So you don't see actual penetration, you don't see actual dong, but, you know, there's no doubt what's going down in those hotel rooms. And you know, it's, it's said it's probably typically a little more graphic than most shows, but I don't know, I think it's pretty good. I love how Pete and DJ are playing it up. And I don't know if you saw the, it was Pride Night at the Canadiens the other night, and they actually played a trailer on the jumbotron game. And you know what? Like, shout out to the Canadians because, hey, look, man, it's fucking 2025, almost 2026. We all have gay cousins, aunts, uncles, his friends. The fact that people still apprejed against that is just ridiculous. So, like, shout out to Montreal just, But you know, like emphasizing that, you know, they're just, they're just us, they're just other people. They just like different stuff in the pizza.

[D]

Basically, you saying, I wish I had the Russian's ass is hilarious. All right, that's classic line, bro.

[A]

I got done. I got a my, My ass.

All the time.

[D]

Biz makes fun of me all the time. Got no butt.

Pizza box ass.

[C]

You get some of those bands ra and work your glutes and that'll help with your L5s one or your side, if you're activating your glutes a little bit more, I think that's going to help take a little bit of the stress away.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, I could do that, but there's no. This ass ain't gonna blow up anytime soon, I'll tell you that.

[C]

Well, it would if you work on it. You do the bottle service girl workouts. Now. People also said that it, it's like a, for, for people like, who aren't into hockey. It's a good entry. Like, it's a good entry point. Who might not know much about hockey, who are gay in the gay community.

[B]

No.

[A]

Oh, no, absolutely.

[C]

There's not many sports have a show like this.

[A]

Absolutely. And my pal Sarah, Sarah Sivan, she, she's been covering it as well and. Exactly. It's opened up like new fans to hockey because, you know, there's not a lot of like, blatantly, like, Gay shows out there. So, you know, obviously it's going to be big in the gay community. And yeah, they're getting into hockey and it's so simple. I mean, if you. If you're not familiar with it, I used to tell, you know, people back in the day, it's. If you, if you like soccer, it's like. Like soccer, you just gotta score a goal and then not be offside. It's really that simple. Obviously there's more intricacies about it, but it's a pretty simple concept of the game, so. Hey, the more the merrier, man. That's what we always say here.

[D]

I just googled Gene Simmons wife. It's a Shannon Tweed.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

And then I did Shannon Tweed. Soft core porn. This is. This is not softcore core.

[C]

She used to do softcore porn. All right.

[D]

This is. This is hardcore.

[A]

Like so. Yeah. So, like. Well, what do you got you porn on there? Like.

[D]

Yeah, no, I Google image. Shannon Tweed. Softcore porn. And the pictures, they ate softcore.

[A]

Okay, my. My mistake. I thought she only did the skin stuff, but. Yeah, because like, people think that soft core is actual porn, but it's not. You need to. I mean, there's the old Supreme Court justice who said about porn, you know it when you see it, but, you know, if there's no actual penetration, if you don't see things going into other things, it's technically not porn. But apparently I guess she did go the the full Monty, so. Shut out wit.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

All right.

[C]

The rest of the pod here just staring at these images we got.

[A]

Move along here and listen, boys. I had one of the. The best days I. I ever had.

[E]

The.

[A]

Not just since the show started, but in my life. We had the team shy versus the BR's alumni the other night.

[C]

That's awesome.

[A]

And you know.

[C]

Yeah, that. That get up is a little shirt. That's the see through dress facts, I.

[B]

Think, I think you got.

[D]

I think it's just got to be a plain white shirt, right?

[A]

Bro? I. Yeah, I couldn't find one when I was getting dressed. I'm bent over like Yoda with my sciatica. I needed to get the hell out of of here. And I've done it enough times where it's. It's almost become like my thing at this point.

[C]

I suppose moving forward.

[E]

You got to keep the jacket on so you can't see that.

[B]

Is that night.

[A]

No, no, that's. That's one of the hospitality suites down downstairs. God, yeah, that's, you know, aunts, aunts. Uncles, parents there.

[D]

And boy, before you say anything about the, the, the, the day so Ryder skated at Inter Mission.

[A]

I missed them, man.

[D]

No, no, no, no worries. But what I was going to say was that he came home and said, dad, that was so fun. He said it was packed and all the players on the ice were having the best time. That's what I got a kick out of. I was like, oh, what do you mean? He's like. They were just laughing the whole time. All the players, like they were having so much fun out there. Which makes sense based on the show and like all the Bruins alumni, but for you know, a kid who just turned eight to no like how good of a time that all the players on the ice were having. I can't imagine you behind the bench weren't having just as much of a.

[A]

Ball to a wit. I mean to, you know, have my name called out in the PR, you know, Brian Rare Admiral McGonagall. And to be able to like point to my parents and blow my kiss and wave. It's. I mean, you guys, you know, obviously had your names called a zillion times and you know, probably get used to it. I've never had that. And it was great. And the second best part was during warmups, you know, Big Z, he's on the alumni team and he was, you know, doing a lap and we caught I eyes and he skated over to me and said, hey, what's up pal? How you doing? And it's like, you know, I mean, we've done the show a long time. I never assumed people remember us. And, and I said, you know, I fangirled hardcore. I say, Z, congrats on the hall of fame. So well deserved. And I just want to tell you thank you for what you've done for this team, this city, this region. We'll never forget it, buddy. And it was, it was just awesome just to have that moment. And then like, you know, Razor, I hit a Raycroft. He's such a hot man. Love saying hello.

[E]

True Z guys got hurt.

[A]

No, no, no. He, he had a, his, I think his kid's game. He had, he had a skedaddle off too. So. And then, you know, someone said it.

[C]

Was like someone legit said he might have pulled his back.

[D]

That was my son.

[C]

Okay? So I was like, at least he left the game.

[D]

If he hadn't left the game and Ryder said that I'd have been like buddy.

[A]

And, and oh, it was kind of funny because one of my buddies on the shy team, well, he's he's fish on the show. Jacob Smith is name is he for whatever reason was trying to say hello I guess to Z and he gave him like a a little bit of a. A slight hook. Z did not take kindly to a he gave the dag is back to the bench. I'm like bro, what the did you just do? He's like oh I just was trying to say hi and he just you know, he didn't like it wasn't a penalty type thing but he, he, he, he throttled him enough to to get Z's daggers over the bench which is kind of hilarious. But if you like you know Colt Noor, Andrew Ference awesome having a chat with him Timmy Sweeney and then in the handshake line after Joey Mellon I say you know we've had him on the show before. Gave him a big hug. It was just, just such a special day and you know I have such a small pot on the show guys like you know a minimal part but it's, it's such a special family and when you're on the set whether it's for two days, two months, whatever, it does become a bonding experience. And Terry Ryan, you know we had him on the show before was he come but between our show and sure as he's become such a. A dear friend and I I love the guy. He's just such a pure awesome human being. And there was a great piece, I know you mentioned it the other day, an ESPN written by Otter Ocal just about Terry's, you know, voyage. You know he got drafted in the first round. Then things didn't pan out the way he had hoped and he's just never, he never liked you know, woe is me. He just kept chugging along and he's done what he's done and it's great to call him a good, a good friend.

[C]

He was living out of his car at one point so like just the fact that he' turned his life around and everything's going his way and he's, he's thriving and shining and other movie opportunities all over the place.

[D]

It's awesome to see and he's very appreciative too.

[C]

Oh he's the best. That's the best. Great family.

[D]

So like thankful like to us when chicklets cups happen and yeah, that's awesome.

[A]

And you know Morasty was there too. I always love hanging out with him and it just to like another thing like you know we were in the hospitality thing after him. You know my dad had been the guy gotten since the Bruins raised the banner back in 2012. And I think he'd only been on one other time when Big Walt was in town back like the late 90s. But, like, he's been me. I'm the starfleet of the family, not my dad. But he's been waiting to meet Jared for years. And Jared, like, it wasn't. Hey, how you doing? Nice to meet you. He sat there and talked to him for 15, 20 minutes. Andrew Ference hung out with my dad for like a half hour, shooting the breeze. You know, I got to introduce him to Joey Mellon and Kerry Fraser. Dad's a huge hockey fan, man. So just like I said, man, just a. An awesome special day. And I as I've said this to you before, I mean this in the best way possible. Canadians of animals, man, when it comes to getting you guys. Oh, just having a good time. Yeah.

[C]

Those guys are East Coasters, so they're a different breed.

[A]

Yeah. Such. Such a great time. So anyways, we. We can move along. I just want to give.

[C]

No, that's awesome. Ra, man. It's good to get out of the house and see buddies and.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, get out of your. Your regular routine. So good for you, buddy.

[E]

Dust off straight out of Compton shirt and wear it as an undershirt.

[C]

Yeah, I'm gonna start doing that on. On tnt wearing my.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I'll start a trend.

[D]

Why are you the only guy who doesn't wear a tie on there?

[C]

I don't know. I just don't like wearing ties. Like, it, like, it like grinds my neck and then I get like.

[A]

Oh, like a choking thing.

[B]

But you like, do you like.

[A]

No, not. Not particularly me.

[C]

Yeah, you guys, I don't mind it.

[D]

I don't. I don't really like business.

[C]

Cash. I don't know.

[D]

No, I didn't know because you were the only guy, so I wasn't sure.

[C]

I think talk. It did it early on and I'm like, oh, can I like, get away with this? And then they never said nothing, so I just did it. And like, I just hate. Like, I can't tie a tie properly. I have brutal ties.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

It's not. You're trying to match them to each thing like that.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. I think the no tie thing, it's gotten a lot more popular, I'd say in the last five, ten years than ever before. You know, I. I biz. I know you like to get choked once in a while, but not with a tie.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

And one last thing. Jared, you know, he does Have a new show. He signed a huge deal with Crave Canada. They're sort of like the Hulu of Canada. It's called I Kill the Bear. It's about a family of bear wranglers on a film set. And he's got some major stars. I'm not gonna spoiler alert, but it's going to be coming out sometime next year. So it's just like I said, it's great to just play in his. His little sandbox and he's just the best dude in the world. So. Thanks. Thanks for letting me.

[C]

How do you watch Shoresy in the States? Because season five kicks up, kicks out on Christmas Day. So when does it eventually come out in the States? And like, where do you find hits.

[A]

Crave up in Canada? Christmas Day. And then I believe sometime in January, it hits Hulu down here. So it hits Canada first, then it hits Hulu down here. So.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, it's great. Like I said, great stuff. Great to be a part of. And the people, the Shazzy family, absolute fucking best. So moving right along, we've been talking about the NHL, the ice surface guys. I honestly don't typically side with the iihf, but they've confirmed the ice surface are gonna be smaller. 196.85ft by 85.3. They've said basically they agree the differences are insignificant and should not impact the safety or quality of gas gameplay. And I, I agree with the man. I, you know, obviously played street hockey down the gym, down the street, but I don't think 18 inches at each side of the rink is that much of a difference. And Keith, I'll ask you, is, is it going to affect any guys, any players particularly, Is it a benefit to any guys? Like, what's your intake on it?

[B]

I mean, it might.

[D]

It.

[E]

I mean, it'll take. Cause these guys are so good, it might take them a shift or two to get used to it. But I heard Brady and Matthew Tkachuk talking about it. They're like, we don't give a shit if we play in somebody's bathtub. You know what I mean? Like. Like they don't. The players don't care. We're obviously making it more of a big deal than it is. But at the end of the day, they're hockey players. They just want to get on a nice sheet and play. You just hope that it's done and you hope that it can withhel withhold, you know, 50 games in however many days. That. That I. That for me, I think, is the biggest question. It's not, it's not the size of the, the ice.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

It's more the surface. Like how it is the ice good or bad? It's.

[E]

Is it going to hold up with, you know, so many games? You got the women's.

At least.

[A]

The NHLPA's main concern is more, more about the ice quality than, than so much the, the length of the ice. But what, what do you think they're like, is a, a specific player or type of player who. Yeah, this may benefit them in some way?

[D]

Tom Wilson.

[A]

Okay. Yeah, that's, that's all right.

[D]

You know that if Tom Wilson's not on the team, Biz is going to be waving the American flag throughout the two week tournament.

[C]

They'll just beat this. They'll beat this like a death horse.

[E]

You said it, buddy.

[C]

I, I said it in just on Merrick's podcast. Like, you want to keep, you want to keep, you want to keep beating this? We can do it. But he's going to be on the team, so it doesn't matter.

[A]

No, I, I agree too. The, the, yeah, he's having it should be on the team. And about Willie toy, great guy. Like, he carved out so much space for himself years ago and the league has gotten so much softer. Like, he's basically got his own playpen in front of the net, man. Like, I mean that's, you know, he scores. I think he's what, 17, 18 goals? Like, he just, you know, he, he like kind of reminded me like nearly back in the day, people just don't want to be around you, don't want to fuck with you. And you got a lot more space to score goals. So shout out Willie. And yeah, like I said, I don't think it matters. I think it's the equivalent of like shaving like a, a yard and a half off of football.

[C]

To me it's more about the disrespect towards the fact that like we're coming. The NHL is allowing you to use its players to now be one of the more popular. How many people watch the Olympics when the NHL got guys weren't there. How many people are going to watch it because they are.

[E]

I didn't watch it.

[C]

You got eight years to build a rink and then you still, you're, you're, you're finishing it days before they show up. Which tells me that the, like, the, where the concessions is, the locker rooms, like, I'm assuming it's going to be a show and it's not going to be fully, fully done, so. And Then the quality of the ice. So if it's all. And it kind of turns into a bit of a show show, I just view it as a slap in the face and it should be a big, a big topic of conversation of how that's going to work moving forward. Because I feel like if you control the best on best and I get these guys want to go to the Olympics and experience the Olympics, they're not even going to be there for the opening and closing ceremonies. Yeah, they'll get to experience like the Olympic Village and stuff like that. But at what cost moving forward is this type of going to keep happening? That's all I got to say. And maybe it's just an Italy thing because they take those long lunches and they're, they're. We know that they're, they're typically a. Why are you laughing? Are they not a typically a society that kind of goes at their own pace?

[A]

Well, Irish and Italian, we've had a love hate thing in Boston for the last hundred years. So that's all Little Chuck. I, I love my it but they definitely done up getting this, this rink build. No doubt.

[C]

That's what I mean. It's just a level of respect. It's like come on here at the best players in the world coming to perform in your country. Country pitter patter. Let's get at her.

[A]

There we go. Hey, and boys, listen, if I'm a general manager who needs a goalie right now, I would make a, a huge play for uc. So give up a couple. First a goalie at first a prospect, whatever. He's 30. He was peaking before Nashville hit the skids here. Right now he's 10, 10 and 3 with a.303 goals against an.896 save percentage. He's in the first year of an eight year deal at 7.74 a AV. He's a great goalie on a bad team. So he's going to look bad. His numbers are going to look bad. He does have a no move clause. I mean that just means he has to okay his exit if he wanted to. And I'm not trying to start a room here or anything. I just think that Nashville things are bad right now. They're 17th ranked on future prospects via ESPN and obviously Edmonton is the obvious place that you know, people would think and they'd have to send money out for money back. But I don't know man. And I think if I'm a gm, get this guy on a good team. I think we've seen it before, like Corpus Salo, for example, he was on Columbus, you know, not great numbers. Then he went to Ottawa. Not great numbers. He comes to Boston. It's a good team. And he's been a like more than competent backup. Definitely a 1B goalie. So again, I don't think it's going to happen. And G reminded me that they had drafted Michigan's freshman goalie Jack Ivankovich, 58 back in June. Says he's one of the most underrated goalie prospects. 16 and 4 this year with a 190927. I don't think he's quite NHL ready yet. But I mean it might be good for Nashville building toward the future to get some draft picks from. What say you Biz?

[C]

I, well they've won five of the last seven, but I, I agree with you. I feel like it's a team that just needs to tear it to the ground and they just got to hope they could, they can get off of some of these contracts like Stammer in March or so. I don't think Ryan O'Reilly finishes the year there. So yeah, I think it's going to, I think it's all going to happen just at what, at what point price the money in, money out with what Soros makes. So it's going to be very difficult for Edmonton to make that work.

[D]

I can't believe that they signed him to that deal and then moved Askarov with like where they're at and obviously they thought that getting Marsha so and Stamco, how's Askarov been? I, I, I, he got hurt. He actually got hurt last night. That's why there was an E bug in Philly.

[A]

39 year old geologist.

[D]

Yeah, he's a geologist that played at Colgate 20 years ago. But, but I think he's been pretty solid. I let me look up his numbers.

[A]

No, he's, he's been great. He started a little shaky because I, when I look at the schedule every night, the Bruins are the first team and then the shocks of the second team. I look for love watching celebrity. He's been really, really good the last couple weeks. He had a tough game the other night but for, for a young goalie.

[D]

I think he's, he's really over.900 save percentage.903, 3.09 goals against. But I think his numbers were real bad at the beginning so maybe it's kind of level leveled off. I don't know his last like eight or nine games, maybe they've been better.

[A]

And one, one Other team, like I said, Edmonds, everybody. Edmonton goalie. That's been the talk for years now, but like, I looked at Detroit, you know, like, I know they just brought in Gibson last year. He's 32. He's got 6.4 million through next year. Talbot's 38 years old, 2.5 million unrestricted after this year. I don't know if they want to quit on Gibson this quick, but, you know, they're, they're in the playoff hunt right now. They could, like, solidify that position for the future. It's been a bit of an Achilles heel for them the last few years, so I don't know, it's just another theme I thought might be in the mix for them, too, so.

Oh, well, no, no.

[D]

Yeah. I think they got their two guys and they're, they're sitting third in the Atlantic. It's like. I don't know if they're going to change that up right now.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Like I said, I don't, I don't like, I don't like the stock rumors or whatever, but just a little hot take, I guess. They had the athletic served surveyed 120 players. They did this stuff every year because they did the most punchable player. Who'd You. Oh, I know you talked about the show last night. Were you surprised who won it? Nick Cousins.

[C]

No, Nick Cousins got it. I think we've talked about him before and like, fuck, man, he, his job is to go out there and stir it up and he does a hell of a job doing it. Like, he said things to guys on the ice that have forced them to go down the tunnel and try to get him in. In the opposing locker room. So this is, you know, he's, he's a special breed. It's a hard job to do. You gain a lot of enemies doing it. And he's still in the NHL and, and honestly, like, the game needs entertainment like that. So, yeah, kudos to him for, for winning that award. Now, I did see that Connor Bedard got one vote, right?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. It was a little bit of a surprise.

[C]

So Nick Cousins ran away with it big time.

[E]

It was McTavish who voted for him. I saw, I saw it. Oh, it's all the results.

[A]

All right. Mashon was second, who I, I thought would have been the, the runaway winner. Mashan, 19.

[C]

No, but he's too likable now.

[A]

You know what?

[D]

It.

[A]

I think it just shows you how much people hate Boston sports, that, like, everybody hated Mashan Feas. All he had to do was go to a team not in Boston. And everybody loved the guy.

[D]

I don't know though. He won it in Florida. He was their best player at least in the final finals. And he's really cut down on all the old. Like it wasn't just being on the cities.

[C]

You see what he did the other day?

[A]

He tried to crash the timeout. Like.

[D]

Yeah, but I'm talking like the low hit on Salo or the licking of. Oh yeah, the face. Like that stuff's kind of gone away. Like going over to the bench, trying to watch your play to score a goal with the goalie pulled.

[C]

Yeah. Attack. Did he attack Darlene earlier this year? Was that him?

[E]

Yeah, he ripped his helmet.

[C]

Ripped his helmet apart.

[D]

So, yeah, I guess he hasn't changed that much.

[E]

He's still got it. He's still got it in him.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I, yeah, I mean, list.

[C]

Off 10 things he's done in the last 12 months.

[A]

It's a badge of honor. You know, Boston fans, I mean, we love to be hated. You know, it's like you hate us because you ain't us. So. Yeah. Maddie Kachuk, he was there with 10%. What was funny was Eric Sinek. Most of the votes he got were from his own team. If he wasn't on my team, probably ya, I, I thought that was pretty funny. Then they asked about social media. They asked, do you have a burner? 95% of the guys said no, which surprised me. Have any of you guys ever had a burner? I know, I know, never needed one, but.

[B]

No.

[D]

But I think for those guys, what a burner means is not like someone that's out there commenting on stuff. It's somebody that has an account that's not public so they can read, tweet, Twitter.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Just a lurk.

[D]

Yeah, it's not like a burner, like replying, torturing people like a troll.

[C]

Buddies. Their buddies might even know it's them. Like there's prob. I'm curious though. There might be like NHL guys who have burners and like with their buddies and they're like coming at us on, on. I'm sure it's happened before, right?

[A]

Definitely a wit.

[C]

Well, Yan doesn't have a Twitter.

[D]

Quiet me.

[A]

Yan, would you get Twitter call like you said?

[C]

No, you're not going to get it.

[E]

No.

[C]

Is it just because it's just like too much? It clogs your brain?

[E]

I don't know. I feel like I'm past that. Like it'd be like wearing fucking Jenko jeans for Me right now, you know, like just love.

[C]

Not going to hurt Jenko's. Those are coming back.

[E]

I know, that's what I mean. But I can't jump on the bandwagon once everybody, everybody's on it. So no, no, I got no interest in it, to be honest.

[A]

I can relate to that. As far as I call your friends know who it is because when you know box Boston come out, when they first got the plug, I mean it was probably 2005. I think I was one of like all these people comment on the Internet, they're losers, blah blah, blah. But at the time Boston, Boston was very Boston centric and you know, it was very like a lot of Bruin stuff there. So I actually that was the first time I got an Internet login thing and I use Rare Admiral because I think 12, 15 guys from college knew that nickname. So I was like a joke proxy. So when my buddies read the site, they knew it was was me. But like nobody else did then. Look, of course I end up getting the blogging gig and then this. So the secret was out after that. But yeah, it was it, it was similar like that. You boys get a chuckle at it, but not everybody knows who you are. So next up, the iron man streak. And we got a guy who knows a shitload about that. Phil the thrill still number one at 1064 after he passed Julian Deli. 40 year old Brent Burns, he's at 954, the current leader. He's 111 games to pass Kessel after to him way down. Nick Suzuki 483. So Burns is like, I mean shit, almost 500 games above number two. Now Keith, I want to ask you, like what's the biggest factor in playing that many in a row? It. Is it luck? Is it just plain luck?

[E]

Yeah, I mean a little bit of everything. Especially like a guy like Brent Burns, the fact that he's done that is insane to me. Just the way that he plays, you know, he's a bigger physical guy blocking more shots, you know, playing PK at least the majority of his career. I don't know if he's still doing doing it. But yeah, like the fact that he's doing it is insane to me. The fact that Andrew Cogliano got to where he did, where he should have the record. But like the way that those guys played that, that kind of amazes me. Like me and Phil were a little more similar in the way that we played. Not really, you know, it didn't play like Brent Burns and Cogliano. So I, I honestly have no clue how he's doing it. You obviously, you know that he, he's huge into his. Whatever's in that bag that he's got that he carries around. Like he, you know, he's warming up and you know, getting his right supplements and all that stuff. So, yeah, just complete credit to him and I don't see anything that's stopping him.

[A]

Another thing they asked what's the next unbreakable record to fall. They brought up career goals. A lot of guys mentioned Auston Matthews, 413 goals and 653 games. And I thought this quote was interesting. I don't think it's going to be Matthews like everybody else else does. I think it's going to be part of the next, this next wave of players. It might be a name we don't know yet. Which, you know, I thought that was, you know, like I said, interesting because this, the skill level we talk about all the time, these kids. But that and celebrity and Carlson, it just keeps getting better and better. So do you think it would ever get broken with.

[D]

I, we were saying the other night, I don't think the goal record's going to get broken. The, the point record will never be touched. I guess that doesn't even count anymore. Um, but I was saying with these guys in the hotel room in Jersey, that the coolest thing for me watching hockey now, and it's always been this way, is like there's some five year old out there right now that in like 15 years we're going to be like, oh my God, like this guy's the best we've ever seen. And yes, that gets used like a lot. When I say it about McDavid, people bring up Crosby, you know, Cups and all that, and I'm not saying he's better than Crosby, but like McDavid has done things and McKinnon now is doing things we've kind of never seen, but there's going to be somebody and then after that there's going to be somebody else. And every sport, just as, as time goes on, like there's players who are better and better and better and that's the most wild thing is like, yeah, there's some kid, maybe he's not even born yet, who's going to get to the NHL at 18 years old and it's going to be just jaw dropping, shocking stuff that we, I think there's.

[C]

No way the gold gets broken. Goalies are, are, are too good now and, but if you'd have to play Even like the top end goal guys, like what's, who's like the top projected goal scorer for this year. It's probably like in the high 50s.

[A]

Oh, Nate dog.

[C]

Yeah, right. But is it like, is it what? Is he in the high 50s?

[D]

He's on pace, so he's got.

[A]

Gotta be.

[D]

He's on like 60, I think.

[C]

Okay. So that, that's like we've seen before where guys have gotten even more than that. So it's not even like that keeps going up. Like the amount of goals that are guys are getting in one season. You have to play 20 years by the time OV's done. And now the way that OV's going this year, like if you watch their games, like he's slow, like he does not move around much. He's just waiting for his one tees and the other four guys to do all the work. Like, does he go to the hard areas? Is he still a clutch goal scorer? Is he still fucking Alexander Ovechkin? Absolutely.

[B]

Absolutely.

[C]

I think he could maybe play one more year now after this. So he'll probably get to a thousand. You'd have to play 20 years and get 50 ever every year. I don't think someone is going to be able to. Can't stay healthy.

[D]

I know. I don't think he's going to get to a thousand either, even playing next year.

[C]

Okay. Oh, you okay? Well, yeah.

[D]

Maybe. Is he like 90 away? So say so he, he, he has to get.

[A]

What does he.

Like, nine, I think. 911 or 912, I think.

[D]

So say, say whatever. 85 away. He's got to get, he's got to get 30 more this year and then he, and he needs 55 next year.

[E]

It's like, yeah, that's.

[C]

So he'd maybe play two. I would, I would even put it past him, man. If he keeps scoring 35 goals and he wants to play hockey, Washington's going to sign him, they're going to pay him. So. Yeah, I don't know. But either way, I mean, let's, let's say n. You have to be 19 years in a row and score 50 every single season. No, I don't know. I don't think that's happening.

[A]

Yeah, I, I will say two records that I don't think are ever, ever going to be broken. The penalty penalty minutes for Korea, Tiger Williams, 3,971 penalty minutes and 962 games. I, there's, I, there's no way anyone's going to catch that the way the league is down. And Dale Hunter, he was second.3535,65. He had 1347 penalties in 1407 games. This hilarious numbers. And then for the season, the Hammer Dave Schultz had 472 penalty minutes in 76 games for the Broad Street Bullies. Back in 74, 75, 109 total penalties. He's also number four on the list too. So. I don't know. Those are two records. I can't imagine we'll ever get close.

[E]

To being a goaltending one. Who's the goalie in Toronto that played like 80 games one year back in the day?

[A]

Johnny Bauer.

[E]

Johnny Bower. Yeah. Doesn't he have the record for like most games played consecutively?

[A]

It's. It's either him or it might be. Or Jacques Plant, one of those guys.

[E]

One of those old, old school guys has like the most consecutive games.

[D]

500 I think or something.

[E]

It's insane. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Especially that position. So also, hey, I want to give a. A big shout out to Craig Smith. He announced his retirement after 1070 regular season and playoffs games. Over 14 seasons with 6 teams. Nashville's 4th round pick back in 09. He spent some time here in Boston for a smidge. The fans loved him here. I appreciate his style, play. I don't know, it just. It didn't stay here too long, but I think we got to see what kind of play he was, you know, five 20 goal seasons. A plus 88. By all accounts a great guy, a great teammate. So enjoy retirement, brother. You any, any of you guys know him at all? Keith, I mean, I know you played.

[D]

No.

[E]

At the same time, I've ran into him a few times. Super nice guy. But what I. When I think of him, I think of that empty net he missed in Nashville. Remember when he roofed it.

Out of the. Out of the Bridgestone Arena? It went out and. But yeah, amazing career. He played hard. Like worked really hard. Had a bomb for a shot. Very competitive.

Probably mostly known for his time in Nashville, I'd say. Right. But he was good for the Bruins. Yeah, a great career. Getting over a thousand games. Amazing, amazing career. Good for. For him. And best of luck in the next chapter.

[A]

Absolutely.

[D]

We should also shout out. Yeah, we should also shout out Luch. Luch. It didn't work out in St. Louis, which sucks. But he's going over to business league in England.

[C]

The IHL.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Wow.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Where is he going?

[E]

502 games for Glenn hall. Playing consecutive as a goalie.

[A]

That's been.

[C]

That's never getting touched. I was even gonna say Marty. Is Marty BRODUR the win leader? 691.

[A]

I believe he did pass Patty.

[D]

Yeah. But he played in a lot of years with ties, man. So that's not one. I would definitely say that's fair.

[C]

You'd have to go. You'd have to win 35 games every year for 20 years.

[A]

Fuck.

[D]

I know. But if you get a couple years with 40 win. Yeah, I know that that's. That's going to be tough. But with him having ties in his career at least it kind of brings a possibility.

[A]

Yeah. One of the. I mean the best money goaltenders ever. No RA but yeah. I mean got one game that you got to win him. Wow. Hashtags. I think those are the three no brainers. But we're gonna print a little old school segment back with this. Even pre day two. The OG Chicklet segment. The first one we ever did. All right, Hamilton?

[C]

Oh yeah, baby.

[A]

Yeah. It's too convoluted to explain explain the origin of the name but take listen to questions. Hockey questions are welcome. But you know the other stuff is pretty fun. Fun. So I'm gonna kick it off with this one. I want to hear what you guys have to say. This is from Zach Ahez 21. They make a spitting chicklets movie. Who do you guys realistically want to portray? All right, Hamilton. And I had.

[E]

All right, Hamilton.

[A]

I hate to say this with. I had Michael Rapaport playing you. I know he sucks, but.

[D]

Yeah, stinks. But everyone says I look like him. It's not great.

[E]

It's not great.

[A]

Biz Johnny Bernthal.

I mean it's definitely a, you know, compliment.

[C]

I'd say why wit or what yet?

[E]

No, no. I was waiting to see if Whit says from me, go ahead.

[A]

For myself, Ed Harris. It's, you know, it's not like he's Paul Newman. I'm like pump my own tires here. But bald. Good actor. Whatever for G. Paul Dano.

Paul Daniel would be good for G. Yeah, that's fair.

[D]

RA Gives himself a stallion. He gives me and Grinelli two ugly guys.

[A]

No, well, I mean Daniel's great. Great actor. I was gonna say Quinn Hughes, but that. That was the obvious one. And then for the game notes boys, Merle's. It will be played by Chris Pine. I mean Merle's is the. The best looking guy in the whole crew. Obvious. He's gonna have a good actor. And Jason Seagull as Colby Armstrong. I think that would be a good fit.

[C]

What do you got Is Seagull the one in In Forget Sarah Marshall.

[A]

Wow. Shows his wrench. Yeah.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Who you think I was gonna say for you, Keith?

[E]

I know. Thanks for having me in there. All right, Ba Boy.

[A]

What?

[C]

Did you not write yes, hands in.

[D]

No, he didn't.

[C]

Who would you have said? Yance?

[A]

I would. You know what? The guy. You ever see the old Nickelodeon show? You can't do that on television. It's old school. Canadian show. No, the guy who worked at Bosbergus. That's who would play Yanz.

[C]

What about Warren from something you just said this. I was going to say the same name. Paul Rudd. I was going to say the same guy because when he's got a beard, I could see it.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Wait, what?

[D]

You just say Warren from something about Mary.

[E]

Ah, dude, I thought you were gonna say Baba. Bowie didn't. Oh, no, that was Okie who used to call me that. Yeah. Thanks for. Thanks for having me in there. I appreciate it. Custodian stink.

[A]

Oh, that was brutal. All right, let's see here. Another question here. What are your favorite sporting events outside of hockey? And can you share some personal memorable moments? Me? The World Series is always a classic, but watching a major upset is awesome stuff. That's from pucks in deep. And boys, I've said it before. I'm lucky as fuck to see what I've seen over the years. But the Patriots biz are the only Boston team I have not seen win a championship in person because Super Bowls, you know, tough to predict. You don't know who's going to be in it and it's always a designated site. But I did see them win the Fog Bowl. What you remember that? Versus pull Pittsburgh 97. The big bond with Terry Glenn. And I was at the Snowball tuck rule game versus Oakland at 02. Couple of, you know, indie division winter games back when they were on the run. Back of the day, I saw the Celts win at the original God in 86, then a TD guide in 08. The Bees went in Vancouver at 11, the Sox in 04, as well as Game 7 in the Bronx. I saw the last ever playoff game at the garden in 95, and it was the only time I ever saw a wave in the Boston Austin Garden because fans were so desperate to keep the season going, keep the winning going, that they literally did a wave and it was so like the opposite of what Boston fans usually do. Clemens's first 20 strikeout game. I was there. Jim Rice when he saved a little kid got hit by a fall ball and one of the most underrated Super Bowls. Super Bowl. I suck at Roman numerals. I don't know, 33, 43, whatever. It was Pittsburgh in Arizona, down in Tampa. Remember that one, Keith? San Antonio homes. The toe tapper. Like, two minutes left.

[D]

Larry.

[A]

Larry Gerald cost me a bundle, man. I had him for mvp. But yeah, down in Tampa. I just said it. I'm gonna. I'm gonna buy a ticket. I went down game by myself and saw one of the. Like I said, I think it's one of the most underrated Super Bowls ever.

[E]

I thought you were gonna say shy versus the Bruins alumni, where you talked about that game to start off. The show is like 70 too.

[D]

Don't maybe go Russia. USA in Lake Placid was the question. You had to be there.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

I give your top 20 favorites or your number one.

[A]

I started writing them down. I just was like, holy. I. I didn't realize it was this many. And, like, I've seen 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7 Stanley cup glitches when they. When they bring the cup out on the ice.

[D]

You've never mentioned that before.

I can't think of anything like, super, super memorable that I've been at that World Cup, France, Argentina final, when Mbappe had the hat trick and Messi got the win. That. I'll never forget watching that. That was an amazing. But I wasn't.

[A]

What about you, Biz?

[C]

I was at game seven of the World Series this year. That was like, an incredible game. I'm not even a big baseball guy. That whole run and like, what it, like, you know, Canada versus usa, like, big, you know, Dodgers, big money franchise. So that was just super cool and. And I hope they can go on another run next year. I don't think I've been there for, like, anything else significant for a sporting event. You know, I actually did. I think there was a Rugby World cup game overseas. It was Samoa, Samoa versus England, I believe, and it was in Wales. The game was taking place there. And that was my first time watching rugby live. I'm a big rugby guy. Like, I could. If a game's on which they like normally not on my TV anyway, like, I'll sit there and just watch it. Those guys are beasts. So if I could go. If I could go to, like, a Rugby Sevens World Championship, like, with. With a bunch of the boys, I would go do that.

[A]

Ruggers. They animals too. I college, absolutely.

[C]

Rugby sevens is like, there's a little bit more space out there and there's more scoring. So a little Bit more entertaining. So I guess, I don't know, I'd have to talk to rugby enthusiasts. Easiest to, like, say, hey, which one.

[E]

Should we go to?

[C]

What?

[E]

Pft.

[C]

Pft. He. I think him and Wonton went to, like, a rugby sevens tournament and they took like, acid and shrooms, and it was a pretty gnarly experience in. In video.

[A]

What about you, Keith? What's that? The biggest thing you. You caught in person, probably the super.

[E]

Bowl when the Patriots beat the.

Falcons when they were down.

[A]

No. What? You were at 28 at three.

[E]

Yeah. 28, three. Yeah. And I was with Sean Thornton and he wanted to leave at halftime. And I'm like, not happening, dude. Whoa.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Didn't. Didn't that one guy, the movie star, leave at halftime?

[A]

Yeah, Maki back.

[E]

And they wouldn't let him back in either. Good.

[A]

Yeah. You leave the arena, you're donezo done. All right, boys, that was fun stuff. A couple more things here. Classic recommendation for this week. A show that only had one season back in 1992 called Freaks and Geeks. Judd Apatow was the creator behind it and it had all these future stars that, like, were unknown back then. James Franco, Jason Siegel. We just talked about Seth Rogen, Linda Catalini and Granoli. Come. Come on in. Like, he told me when we talked about the outline yesterday that he actually had a classic college that broke down this whole season.

[F]

Right, G. Yeah. I mean, that just goes to describe what Plymouth State education is. It was called watching television 101. We'd go in, watch Freaks and Geeks weeks, one episode every class, and then we would just break down the episode. It's like I said, it just describes what Plymouth State is, but unbelievable show. So many actors that, like, launched their career.

[A]

Yeah, I know you guys are jocks. You might not relate to, like the Freaks and Geeks aspect of it, but it's a great show. Like I said, only got one season, didn't get renewed. But if you're looking for something to watch, get on that round. And up here we got NHL picks tonight. Take Tampa Bay minus one, Fish 15. They're playing at Jersey. I think they got their swagger back. They beat up Montreal last night. Pretty big after a four game losing streak. And as per usual, put half of your wager on the puck line plus 215 and NFL picks. I like Tampa Bay minus four and a half over Atlanta tonight as well. They got embarrassed last week. Atlanta is trash. And this weekend, Detroit take the five and a half with the Rams. Buy it up to six if you can. So that's. That's it, boys. Fun week and. All right, all right, wraps it up.

[D]

Great job, stay hot, and couple clicks.

[A]

For the janitors to the custis.

[D]

Absolutely, everyone, we'll see you Monday, live. Can't wait for it. Love you all. Have a great weekend.

[C]

Watch the sandbagger Arriva d.

Again.

It.

[B]

Won'T happen won't happen won't happen again.

A bad habit worth breaking but it's taking time I don't know it don't let it it's going to happen it's going to happen again.

[C]

Wanna.

[B]

Wanna, wanna wait.