Spittin Chiclets Episode 636: Featuring Colby Cohen (April 10, 2026)
Episode Overview
This episode of Spittin Chiclets, hosted by Ryan Whitney (“Wit”), Paul Bissonnette (“Biz”), Rear Admiral (RA), and Producer Grinnell, is a quintessential blend of NHL talk, irreverent humor, and lively banter. The episode dives deep into recent hockey happenings—playoff races, management shakeups, wild card chases, and the college hockey Frozen Four. Special guest Colby Cohen joins to unpack his insights as well as discuss college hockey's current state. This episode also features classic off-the-cuff TSN, hilarious personal stories, and candid debates on key NHL topics, all with the Chiclets' signature edge and camaraderie.
Main Segments & Key Insights
I. Banter, Recaps, and Listener Stories
[02:12–09:30]
- “Pinkies up!” Recapping the popularity of Pink Whitney (the podcast’s signature drink) at the Frozen Four, stories of post-game celebrations, and the Pink Whitney party at Vegas.
- Wit tells a childhood littering story that lands him in trouble with his dad, provoking a hilarious round of discipline memories.
- Wit: “Sometimes you gotta learn a lesson the hard way...that was one of the days for me.” (03:50)
- Merles’ infamous casino moment: demands a blackjack table go to video review after being missed on a blackjack hand, leading to a table shutdown and ejection.
- Wit: “I don’t want to hear him ever complain about offside and goalie reviews. Every blackjack table, we’re going to the cameras at one point!” (06:01)
- Biz: “If you go to video review and you slow down the table and create a fiasco, and you’re wrong...ban. Instant ban from that casino.” (06:35)
II. Biz’s Arizona Adventure: “Peaking/Seeking” at Havasu Falls
[09:45–21:00]
- Biz breaks down his trip to Havasu Falls in Arizona: the logistics, beauty, history, and cost of visiting this coveted natural wonder.
- Biz: “Very hard to get these passes, guys… it’s actually the most expensive permit to buy as far as Parks goes, it’s a $450 permit… three-night stay.” (10:57)
- Mule rental for gear, Indigenous history, the unique mail delivery system (by mule), and the breathtaking landscape of waterfalls amidst the red rock canyons.
- Group laughs about mules being the “fourth line grinders” of the animal world, and why mules can’t reproduce.
- Biz on camping sleep: “My biggest key...Bring, like, a pillow… a tempur-pedic pillow, maybe a mattress, little extra weight for the donkeys.” (19:54)
- Yan’s laments never visiting Havasu in nine years living in Arizona: “We used to go out to Sedona every year...I never even heard of that. I’m so pissed.” (20:46)
III. New Jersey Devils Front Office Shakeup: Pasha’s Therapy Session
[21:45–37:03]
- Pasha, a self-acknowledged suffering Devils fan, unpacks Tom Fitzgerald’s departure as GM—what went wrong and why it had to happen.
- Debate over what’s “on Fitzy,” including:
- Poor drafting, over-use of no-move clauses, inability to land Quinn Hughes, and the ripple effect of early contract decisions (e.g., Dougie Hamilton).
- Pasha: “Horrific drafting...That Quinn Hughes trade—final stake in the heart, or in the mule, I think.” (24:24)
- Devils’ core vs. Toronto’s: How long do you ride a young core before blowing it up?
- Wit: “It’s not a GM coming into a team that's ready to win this.” (31:05)
- Pasha defends the Devils’ health/age and rails against any mention of “rebuild.”
- Sunny Mehta, analytics-forward exec, touted as a big name for Devils GM; debate over “math guys” in management vs. traditional “hockey lifers.”
- Biz: “I don’t care who’s in charge, but you’re a mental midget if you don’t have a strong roundtable willing to call you out.” (37:51)
IV. Playoff Race Chaos: East & West Wild Cards, Statistical Madness
[53:07–90:21] Subsections below.
1. Flyers—From Purgatory to "Wagon"
- Wit: “The Flyers are a wagon. They’re actually so fun to watch." (53:47)
- Colby Cohen explains team culture shift, Zegras’ improvement, Martone’s rookie surge, and Rick Tocchet's rise against fans' complaints.
- Colby: “Martone...he’s just, he looks every bit the part...the kid’s a freak.” (53:47)
- On Travis Sanheim: “He’s quietly so good. Like you said, you want no adventure from D at this time of year.” (57:40)
2. Bruins Prospects and College Standouts
- James Hagens excitement in Boston (60:06), impact on depth chart.
- Colby notes: “He always plays with his head up...and can help Boston right away on the power play.” (60:06)
3. Wild Card Watch
- Ottawa’s late push, Buffalo’s scoring lead, the Islanders’ defense (Schaefer), and wild swings in standings.
- Colby: “Schaefer, he’s worth buying a ticket to go watch.” (66:00)
- Why fans (and Colby) want Flyers-Penguins first round: “I want to take my kids to see a Flyers playoff game this early!” (67:33)
4. Caulfield’s 50, Montreal’s Ascension
- Caulfield finally hits 50 goals—none of which were empty netters.
- Wit: “You forget how fast Caulfield is, man. He was neck and neck...and then just takes off" (72:23)
- Montreal’s top line potentially the highest-scoring in the league, Suzuki poised to hit 100 points.
- St. Louis’ coaching impact: “Would Caulfield ever have a 50-goal season if St. Louis wasn’t his coach?” (75:54)
5. Pittsburgh’s Resurrection: Crosby’s Last Dance?
- Penguins clinch despite all preseason predictions.
- Wit: “This guy [a listener] bet me $200 the Penguins would finish with more points than the Oilers...Incredible call.” (77:06)
- Dan Muse’s coaching turnaround, Carlson’s late resurgence, and credit to Kyle Dubas as GM.
- Biz: “That Carlson move ended up paying off... he looks like he did the year he had 100 points again.” (79:39)
6. Western Wild Card Mess
- LA’s unlikely wildcard rise: “The Kings might do this...I don’t know how they’re doing it. They’re just...” (84:26)
- Shout-out to Utah’s playoff clinch, Kopitar’s leadership, Ryan Smith’s mammoth Zamboni.
7. McDavid’s MVP Race
- Despite Kucherov/Celebrini mania, the crew settles on McDavid for MVP thanks to dominance (even killing penalties, shorthanded ice time).
- Wit: “He’s the MVP. I’ve made up my mind.” (86:13)
- Biz: “If Crosby somehow wins a fourth Stanley Cup out of nowhere...he has to go on the Mount Rushmore.” (81:42)
V. College Hockey, Frozen Four, and the State of NCAA
[100:09–130:45]
- Colby Cohen dives deep on Denver’s sustained excellence, Coach David Carle’s impact, and the “winning DNA” of their program.
- Colby: “He just gets these guys playing more mature than 85% of NHL teams.” (102:04)
- Coaching job stability and why some great college coaches stay: “Jack Parker could have coached the Bruins, but some guys value family stability.” (106:13)
- NCAA media issues: no video allowed during the Frozen Four, TV deal complaints, the lack of national promotion compared to other college sports.
- Colby: “The game and the product on ice is great, the media side is totally broken.” (109:44)
- USHL vs CHL: debate over strength of leagues, possible future integration, and why each development path matters.
- Need for a “college hockey commissioner,” overtime rules inconsistencies, and why a ‘Premier League’ model isn’t realistic yet.
VI. Ari’s World & Final Roundup
[137:53–175:10]
- RA’s pop culture picks (The Friends of Eddie Coyle, The Godfather viewing stories), funny Boston run-ins (meeting Pasta at the store), and Bruins/NHL history tidbits.
- Stats: Caulfield is only the 7th Hab to score 50, Suzuki first Hab with 70 assists since Lafleur.
- Bruins’ fan irrationality: “Complaining about Pastarnak’s turnovers is like dating a supermodel and complaining about a mole on her back.” (152:47)
- Merles’ Vegas liquor license gripe during Frozen Four—classic NCAA oversight!
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Casino Drama:
“If you go to video review and you slow down the table and create a fiasco, and you’re wrong...ban. Instant ban from that casino.” — Biz (06:35) -
On the Arizona Trip:
“Those people have been living down there for 800 years...it’s the only place in the United States where the post office mail is delivered by mule.” — Biz (13:01) -
On Devils Fandom:
“Happy is not the right word...it had to happen. I’m glad it happened. At least ownership is tapped in, they care, changes are coming.” — Pasha (22:41) -
On Flyers Talkett Fans:
“The hate towards Rick Tocchet—it bothered me so much this year. If anything, he’d be asking people not to talk about this stuff; it makes his life harder.” — Colby Cohen (54:02) -
On McDavid’s Greatness:
“Every year, I think we get numb to it. Then you see nights like against Utah and San Jose—you’re reminded what we're witnessing.” — Wit (88:23) -
On Pastarnak Hate:
“Complaining about his turnovers is like dating a supermodel and complaining she has a mole on the back of her shoulder.” — RA (152:47) -
On College Hockey Media:
“The game and the product on the ice is great, but I think the media side is totally broken.” — Colby Cohen (109:44) -
On Cloud 9 Productions & Leafs Rebuild Pitch:
“We’re not going to call it The Roundtable, we’ll call it The Blunt Rotation. That’s what we’re doing for the Leafs.” — Biz (44:44)
Timestamps
- [02:12] – Pink Whitney, littering story, casino drama
- [09:45] – Biz’s Havasu Falls trekking story
- [21:45] – Devils GM firing, Pasha’s therapy
- [37:03] – Management hiring: analytics vs. "hockey lifers"
- [53:07] – Flyers’ resurgence, Zegras, Martone
- [60:06] – Bruins’ prospect hype, James Hagens
- [65:57] – Islanders, Schaefer’s D scoring record
- [72:22] – Caulfield’s 50th goal, Montreal top line
- [77:06] – Penguins clinch, Dan Muse’s breakout season
- [84:26] – LA/Nashville wild card chase
- [86:13] – McDavid for MVP, Kucherov/Celebrini race
- [100:09] – Frozen Four, Denver’s dynasty, Coach Carle
- [109:44] – NCAA’s “broken” media strategy
- [130:45] – Ari’s World, Boston fandom, whalers doc
- [152:47] – Bruins fans’ irrational Pastarnak complaints
Conclusion
Episode 636 is a sprawling, raucous Chiclets classic—sports talk with no filter. Beyond the laughs, the crew delivers incisive hockey breakdowns, big-picture debates about the sport’s future, and lots of love (and shade) for the teams and personalities powering the NHL’s wildest season yet. Whether you’re a diehard fan or a casual listener, this episode’s mix of stories, analysis, and hot takes guarantees you’re caught up for the home stretch to the playoffs.
