Co-host/Commentator (4:08)

Okay, it's a liberal math.

Lauren (4:09)

This was a private ceremony. And I'm sure, I am sure this is not a marriage of convenience because he has political aspirations in 2028 and wants to run for President. I'm sure this is true love. I'm sure this is true love. That he had a short lived engagement, quickly got married to a woman none of us have ever heard before and barely has a background that we can locate on the Internet. But he has got married to a woman. Cory Booker. So he's gotten married to a woman. The overgrown theater kid who likes to throw tantrums and speak for 25 hours straight. He has gotten married and we have all the details. Let me read them to you right now. So he has married his fiance, Alexis Lewis, I'm sure that's a real name. In Washington D.C. less than three months after announcing their engagement. Now, I've spoken to a few sources who say when it came time to consummate the marriage, he broke into a 25 hour speech in filibuster.

Co-host/Commentator (5:10)

This woman man I'm sorry, I'm not even going to try and be nice. She is in for a life of disappointment. Okay, she is in for a lifetime of disappointment.

Lauren (5:18)

But anyway. The couple married at a courthouse in Newark, New Jersey, days before hosting an intimate wedding in Washington, D.C. on Saturday with just a few of their closest friends and the New York Times.

Co-host/Commentator (5:31)

They shared their wedding details exclusively with.

Lauren (5:33)

The New York Times. Only close family were present as they tied the knot. Alexis Lewis is Jewish and Cory Booker is Christian, so they had both a pastor and a rabbi. Now, she apparently earned her bachelor's degree at NYU and an MBA at Cornell. I also earned my bachelor's at nyu.

Co-host/Commentator (5:50)

And it was about as worthless as toilet paper because here I am on the Internet talking about Cory Booker. So not sure the bachelor's degree from NYU means diddly squat.

Lauren (6:00)

She worked at several corporate and marketing companies before her role in the Los Angeles Mayor's office. So she has a little bit of a political background. She currently is director at Brasa Capital Management. I'm sure there are no conflicts of interest there.

Co-host/Commentator (6:14)

I'm sure she's at a capital management firm. And it has nothing to do with any of the work Cory Booker is.

Lauren (6:19)

Doing in the Senate. They were apparently introduced in May 2024 by a mutual friend known for matchmaking. So maybe they went to a matchmaker. Now, Ms. Lewis, who was living in Los Angeles at the time, met Mr. Booker on a blind date while visiting family in Washington. Now, I bet you it was a blind date, because if you heard. If you heard that a friend was trying to set you up with Cory Booker, you would not appear for the date.

Co-host/Commentator (6:42)

Okay? You would not show up for the date if someone said, I've got a guy for you, Okay, I have got a guy for you. And it's frickin Cory Booker. I think he'd be like, no, I'm good, Actually, you guys, I think. I think I'm good. I'm gonna sit one out.

Lauren (6:57)

But Cory Booker, it's clear to me that he wants to run for president in 2028. All of his stunts and his publicity stunts, they all lead up to the Democratic primary. That's going to start hitting in 2027. So I think he knows that he cannot run for president as an unmarried man. He did horribly, horribly in 2020. His campaign was an abject failure. So was Kamala Harris's, though, and she ended up vice president. So there's room for everybody but Cory Booker. I'm not buying this. I'm not buying this. Okay, we're set up on a blind date. We're. We've just met, we're engaged for three months, and then we do a private wedding with the New York Times. If you guys are going to do a private wedding, do a private wedding. This is very Megan Markle and Prince Harry to me. Like, oh, we just want privacy. We don't want anybody in our business. And then you do a photo shoot and a wedding with the New York Times. And of course, the New York Times is just going to give them nothing but positive attention and praise. And my thing with Cory Booker is this marriage is a holy, beautiful, sacred bond, okay? So on the one hand, of course, I wish them well in their marriage, and I wish them nothing but health and happiness and best wishes. However, it's hard for me to wish Cory Booker well when he votes against my best interest. Right? When he votes against the best interest of women in the United States of America. Cory Booker. What has he done beside, besides publicity stunts? He's voted to keep the borders open. He's fought to keep criminals on the street. He wants men and women's sports. Everything he supports goes against having a functioning United States of America. So I have a hard time wishing him well. Right? I have a hard time saying, Cory Booker, I wish you well in your marriage when you want to destroy the United States of America and you're nothing but a beta male like Chuck Schumer, Hakeem Jeffries, Cory Booker, it's just a trio of beta males who do nothing. They literally do nothing but publicity stunts. That entire government shutdown was literally a stunt. They accomplished absolutely nothing, except they put American families and hardworking people through heartache and pain and stress and strife. So, on the one hand, I wish Cory Booker well with his marriage, of course, but on the other hand, I just think he's an abject failure who votes against our best interest. Now, I will give credit where credit is due, and we'll put the pictures back up, okay? Because I'm a very, very objective person, okay? I can put my feelings aside. I can separate the art from the artist. The dress is pretty. Okay? I will give Alexis Lewis, or Alexis Texas, whatever the hell her name is. I will give her credit. The dress is classic. It's simple. It's beautiful. She's wearing white. Read into that what you. But no, the dress is beautiful. And girls online even said, you know what? It's simple. It's classic. But then again, if you know you're doing a photo shoot in a spread with the New York Times, okay?

Co-host/Commentator (9:32)

And you're going to be publicizing this.

Lauren (9:34)

Everywhere, especially when you come from this world, Right? You come from this marketing world. That's very interesting. You're going to make sure that you wear a nice dress. But we wish the happy couple well. And we'll be tracking this. We will be tracking this. Well, just like clockwork. If you don't bury the dead, they come back to haunt you. Ellen DeGeneres, okay, whose whole thing was about kindness and be kind and treat others with respect. We learned that she was basically running the Stanford prison experiments backstage at her show. And people were crying and running and hiding, and she was allegedly a menace and a terrible boss. Well, she decided, like a lot of these Hollywood celebrities, she actually put her money where her mouth was. She said she was going to leave the United States because of Trump's victory in the last election. So she moved to the United Kingdom. She apparently moved to the Cotswolds. I love the Cotswolds. Okay? The Cotswolds Surrey. I love the movie the Holiday. I'm going to watch the holiday probably ten times in December. December. I want to go live in a.

Co-host/Commentator (10:28)

Little United Kingdom village where it rains.

Lauren (10:31)

Half the time and nobody can reach me. And there's no wi Fi. But she did move with her lesbian lover, Portia de Rossi to the Cotswold in the United Kingdom. Now, President Trump has been in office less than a year, and Ellen DeGeneres has decided, you know what? She misses McDonald's. She misses fast food. She misses driving on the 405 to the 303 to the 202. You know how people in LA talk. And she is going to move back to the United States. Let me read you the details. So Ellen and her wife Portia are reportedly considering a move back to the US after they moved to the UK Yada, yada, yada. Some say the couple would only be staying for the holidays as they try to avoid the cold weather in the Cotswold. See, y' all are quitters. Okay? Don't move to the gloomy, rainy British countryside and then complain when it's gloomy, rainy, and cold. Okay? Y' all should have thought about that. And normally, lesbians are more organized. But there are also reports that Portia wants to return to acting.

Co-host/Commentator (11:24)

Good luck with that. So it remains to be seen how.

Lauren (11:27)

Long they plan to stay in the United States. They will likely move back to California, where they will buy or rent a home and liquidate, blah, blah, blah, their assets and et cetera. Okay, okay. Let me tell you what's really going on. They're bored. They're bored, number one and number two, they hate each other, okay?

Co-host/Commentator (11:43)

Let's be honest, okay?

Lauren (11:45)

They've been together a thousand years. They have been together since the beginning of time. They are one of these legendary lesbian couples, okay? They on sort of the pyramid of lesbianics, okay? They are at the top. Top, okay?

Co-host/Commentator (11:57)

Of lesbianism.

Lauren (11:58)

They are at the top of the freaking pyramid. They are the elite supreme Illuminati lesbians. They are probably so used to living in like a 20 million dollar mansion in Beverly Hills in California now they're probably in a decent home. It's probably really nice for the Cotswolds, but they're in a little British village, okay? They're not in a modern, you know, mid century modern home in Los Angeles with a five car garage and private chefs and all of that. They're really in the countryside. And so what happens to their relationship with all of that togetherness? They want to kill each other, okay? That is what I imagine happened, okay? They had this fantasy they were going to rekindle and go live the holiday with Cameron Diaz and Jack Black. We all know the movie. And Kate Winslet, they were going to. And Jude Law, they were going to live in the British countryside and la de da di da and leave the United States, okay? After a few months together in that house, I'm telling you, it's probably like the Shining, okay? All work and no play makes Ellen a dull boy, okay? They're probably walking around that little house in the Cotswold. It's like the Shining. They're going crazy. They hate each other. They're probably seeing twins in the frickin hallway. And now they're ready to come back to the United States. And it's because all of these celebrities are hypocrites, okay? All of these celebrities, they complain about President Trump, okay? But then the S&P 500 goes up, their portfolios go up. Everything is great, okay?

Co-host/Commentator (13:16)

Everything is great for them. And now they're sitting over there scratching their asses. And the Cotswolds miserable, okay?

Lauren (13:22)

They're miserable. And they want to run back to the California sunshine. And I've also heard that Rosie ODonnell's daughter, and let me make sure I say this correctly, Rosie o' Donnell's youngest child, Clay, who is non binary and autistic, is saying damn Trump and blaming Trump for their move to Ireland because they also left the United States for Ireland. Like a lot of these lesbians, maybe this is a thing where lesbians decide they're going to leave the United States. Ellen, Rosie, this has been a lesbian exodus, but we actually have a clip. Let's roll the clip and then discuss.

Rosie O'Donnell (13:53)

My daughter is now saying, damn him, damn Trump. And smashing her hand on the table. And I said, wow, honey, what, what are you thinking? And she said, he made us move in order for our own safety, and it's now he's destroying the country. You know, listen, wow, she, she lives here. She hears what I'm saying to you. Not that I go around speaking like this every day if it's not an.

Lauren (14:24)

Interview, but I am so sick of all these Hollywood celebrities blaming President Trump for all of their problems, okay? You guys had problems long before he got into presidential politics. You guys will have emotional imbalances well after he has gone from American politics, okay? ROSIE o', donnell, you left the United States and you blame President Trump for that. Ellen DeGeneres, you left the United States and you blame President Trump for that. And gu, now you guys are reconsidering and realizing you want to live in the land of the free and the home of the brave, okay? All of this stuff you tried to say about the United States, that you hated it here and it was fascist and President Trump was a dictator and you're gonna leave and take your money and go away. You're gonna take your ball and flee the United States. Well, now you guys all want to go home, okay? Because you're hypocrites. And you realize that even on America's worst day, okay, even on the United States worst day, it is still better living here than anywhere else, in my opinion. Shout out to the folks in the UK and Australia and folks, watch. Watching us around the world, of course we love you, but I'm allowed to have pride in my own country and say I would rather live here. And Ellen DeGeneres, she's a California woman. She's used to living in California. She wants to come back. ROSIE o' donnell, she does not seem any happier. In fact, Rosie o' Donnell moved to Ireland to get away from American politics. All she does is opine and chime in on American politics, make it make sense. But speaking of out of touch, deranged Hollywood celebrities, we have to talk about Kim Kardashian's head.

Co-host/Commentator (15:54)

I think everyone in Los Angeles is familiar with Kim Kardashian's head game.

Lauren (15:58)

It's how she became famous. But Kim Kardashian has broken the Internet over the weekend. Apparently she went to get her brain scanned by Dr. Amen. She went to this guy, Dr. Amen, and she had her brain scanned, and apparently it showed signs of low activity. Now, she did not need to spend money going to a doctor to tell her that she had low brain activity. I could have told you that. Okay? The Kardashians, they're not in Mensa, okay? They're not brilliant. I don't think Kim Kardashian's brain activity is off the charts, right? And I can tell you she probably has low brain activity from bumping her head on the headboard a few too many times, because if you recall, we discovered Kim Kardashian on her back and a sex tape. So that it's not someone who is.

Co-host/Commentator (16:44)

Probably splitting the atom.

Lauren (16:45)

You know, her middle name is not Einstein. It's not Kim Einstein Kardashian. She just failed the bar exam. I am not shocked that she is showing signs of low brain activity. But there are folks online who think they're setting up for another season of the show, because the Kardashians, it's always a new grift, right? They gotta find something else. Kim Kardashian, she says she had an aneurysm. She says she has low brain activity. I think they're trying to set up for season 500 of the show, and they're desperate for things at this point, right? Kim Kardashian is so desperate, she's going and getting her head scanned on camera and discussing it on the show, right? That is where we are at this point. And I can tell you the Kardashians are getting more desperate because they're trying to cavort and hang out with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, right? They fall in so far, the car trash. Ian.

Co-host/Commentator (17:30)

They went even lower than we realized previously.

Lauren (17:33)

And now they're hanging out with, you know, a wannabe duchess who does nothing but sell jams, jellies, and dog biscuits. So let me a little bit about this brain scan. So she visited Dr. Daniel Amen, who previously scanned Khloe Kardashian and Kendall Jenner's brain. So I put those in a museum. The doctor brought some holes in her brain scanned to her attention, which indicated low activity.

Co-host/Commentator (17:58)

Think maybe she has holes in her head from all the repeated thrusting she's done. I think if you're an LA Laker.

Lauren (18:05)

You'Ve taken a turn on Kim Kardashian. The front part of your brain is less active than it should be. The doctor explained.

Co-host/Commentator (18:11)

Well, if you got holes in your head, that's not ideal with your frontal.

Lauren (18:15)

Lobes, as they Work now, it would be harder to manage stress, and that's not good for you, especially as you're studying and getting ready to take the bar. Doctors also found a little brain aneurysm during her MRI in the Season 7 premiere, which aired in October. Her doctors eventually informed her that aneurysms can be caused by stress. So I think Kim Kardashian, she's done everything to whore herself out. She's shown her body. She's shown her nether region. She's shown it all. She's been on the COVID of magazines naked. She's done sex tapes. She sold a faux bush panty merkin. She's now selling fake nipple piercings. Every day it's a new grift. And I think now she's trying to say she has problems with her health. Her brain is gone. I also think if we're going to get down to brass tacks here, the Kardashians live on their cell phones. The Kardashians, anytime I see them, they have the phones up to their ear. They're on the phones all day long. And I hate to tell you guys, I think there is a correlation between all the cell phone you see up to the head and people who have issues with their brains. Right. I know several people who unfortunately have had glioblastoma. Friends of mine, family, friends of mine have had glioblastoma, which is brain cancer. The worst kind of brain cancer. Just evil. Evil. And very, very low life expectancy is after a year, two years. I mean, if you live five years, it's a miracle. With glioblastoma, it's almost unheard of. And I think it has to do with the cell phones. And I've talked to doctors and scientists who believe it has to do with the cell phones. The Kardashians, every time you see them, they're on the phone, they have it up to their ear. They're talking on the phone. And I just think there could be a correlation between the low brain activity, the holes they're seeing in their brains, and all of the cell phone usage and all the WI fi and everything going on in the house, right? And people are going to say I sound like a conspiracy theorist. Y' all know I'm the least conspiratorial person ever, okay? I think we landed on the moon.

Co-host/Commentator (19:59)

I think I believe every single thing.

Lauren (20:01)

Okay?

Co-host/Commentator (20:02)

If you have a bridge to sell me, let me buy it, okay?

Lauren (20:05)

I am the least conspiratorial person, but I just think there could be a correlation because the Kardashians are always on their phones. Okay? But we gotta move on. We gotta pay some bills. And when we come back, we have a lot more hot topics to discuss. Okay, you guys need to hear this. Today's show is brought to you by Oxford Natural, the people behind Optimum Day and Optimum Night. These are all natural supplements, and thousands of Americans are already on them because they actually work. Here's the deal. Optimum Day gives you clean energy, kills those cravings, and helps with weight loss. Optimum Night, that's your reset button. It calms you down, gets you sleeping deep, and you wake up ready to go again. And the results are insane. Michael Owen. Yeah, the England soccer legend. He's down 40 pounds. Robbie from AFTV dropped over 100. Linda, top law exec, down 50. And Anita, an immigration lawyer, gone 60 pounds. Real people, real results. So if you want in, scan the QR code or hit the link below. And listen, if you use the code spot, you get 70% off your first order. Yes, 70% off. So don't wait. Start your transformation right now with Oxford Natural. Let's get to work.

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Lauren (22:24)

Class and elegance are back at the White House. God put a rainbow in the sky. I am so grateful that First Lady Melania Trump is back in the White House and that Jill Biden has gone on to greener pastures like changing her husband's diaper. Okay. I'm so happy that the Bidens are gone and First Lady Melania Trump unveiled her beautiful Christmas decorations. This week, the theme she chose for this year's holiday season is Home is Where the Heart Is. Now, I love this, right, because there might be some of you watching at home who are alone. Maybe you have a family member who's deployed, who's serving. You've lost a loved one. Maybe you're widowed, right? And so you carry these people with you in your hearts. Even if they're not with you physically, they're here with you in your hearts. Right? Like, my mom is not going to come for Christmas this year, Right? It's going to be the first year in a long time we're not together on Christmas, but my mom is still going to be in my heart, Right? She's still one phone call away, if you're lucky. I know we're getting deep. We're getting deep here, but I love the theme Home is Where the Heart Is. I think it means more today than ever before, especially with all the tragedy and the pain that we're inundated with in the news. It's easy to forget that there is a lot of light out there and a lot of happiness. And so home is where the heart is. I love this theme. And the White House looks beautiful with the Christmas decorations. If you've been on social media, you've probably seen a lot of this already. You've seen it. I actually saw their Christmas trees in the Oval Office, or at least one Christmas tree. And they had ornaments for each branch of the government, which shows you how this administration values our men and women in uniform. Unlike our previous president, who checked his watch as soldiers were coming home, home and caskets from Afghanistan. And then he flew a bunch of Afghan nationals to the country who hate us and want to destroy us. So I am so grateful that they are back in the White House. That class and elegance have returned to Pennsylvania Avenue. And, you know, we went through years where there was cocaine at the White House. Who could that be? Whose cocaine could that be? You had topless trans people on the White House lawn. I mean, the White House was really a cesspool under Joe Biden. It was actually disgusting what our tax dollars oversaw at that White House. And then basically their policies tried to destroy policies tried to destroy us from within. And so I am so happy to see these Christmas decorations. I was actually invited. I was very, very grateful to be invited to come see this Christmas decorations early Monday morning. But I'm not in Washington, D.C. so hopefully I will get to see the Christmas decorations if I go to D.C. at some point in December. But you can see there's a Be Best ornament. Be Best is one of the first Lady's initiatives like she has with the take it down act. So it is really just classy and elegant and it's what you would expect from First Lady Melania Trump, right? Because the way she carries herself, she's going to do too much with fashion. She's never going to do something insane or crazy. It's always just going to be classic and beautiful and something you want to put in a book and hold for posterity. And I feel like that's how she approached the Christmas decorations at the White House. Right? Everything is so done with simplicity, but elegance and class. And of course, I'm sure there's a good budget, right? If we all had a budget that.

Co-host/Commentator (25:24)

Big or else this would look different too, for the holidays. I wish I had had the White House Christmas holiday budget.

Lauren (25:32)

But nonetheless, it looks beautiful. And so kudos to everybody at the White House because it takes a village. And kudos to First Lady Melania Trump for these incredible Christmas decorations. Now we have to move on to her husband, President Donald J. Trump. Now, I have had texts from Democrats the last few days from liberal friends of mine who just tell me on the lower, they are happy with what this president is doing. Because President Trump over the weekend, he has posted that he is going to clamp down and pause all migration from third world countries and he's going to reverse Biden era admissions and foreign nationals who he considers to be public threats. Now, I am so happy about this. I am so happy about this. Because it is not the job of United States taxpayers to subsidize criminals, okay? We have it hard enough, okay? Americans are working. They got to put food on the table, raise their kids. They might have a sick family member. They got to get the kid to soccer practice, they got to do X, Y and Z. Right? Their home might need repairs. Everybody has a lot on their plates. You understand what I'm saying? So we don't need a bunch of BS where we have to fund Afghanistan nationals coming into the country who want to destroy us, okay? And when you look at Afghanistan, 99% of the people believe in Sharia law, 39% believe suicide bombings are justified. These aren't folks who are hunky dory, who I want to be rubbing elbows with. I'm not trying to generalize everybody. I'm sure they're perfectly fine people in Afghanistan. I'm sure all some of these Afghan nationals are decent. But at this point, does it make me an asshole that I don't want to take the chance. No, it doesn't make us xenophobic or bigoted or racist that we want America to be for Americans for a while, okay? We don't need to acquiesce and be destroyed from the enemy within. We just don't have to anymore. And it's Joe Biden who flew these people here on a freaking plane. We can put up the picture. They're crammed in there like sardines and flown here on a plane with our money. And now you have Afghan nationals committing crimes. Shooting, shooting National Guardsmen. God bless Sarah Beckstrom and her family, may she rest in peace. How dare. How dare that person. You had another Afghan national who was building a bomb allegedly in Fort Worth, trying to blow up something in Fort Worth. I was just in Fort Worth for a show with Megyn Kelly. We had thousands of people under one roof, patriotic, God fearing, incredible Americans. I mean, the love in that room. Room. And you have someone in Fort Worth building a bomb probably to take out Americans from Afghanistan, who we brought here. Enough is enough. So thank you, President Trump. Thank you for securing our country. Thank you for securing our border. It does not make us jerks, okay, that we want America to be for Americans, okay? Let America be for Americans for. For a few years. It's not our job to bail everybody else out. We shouldn't be flying terrorists into United. Into the United States and giving them health and benefits and all of these things in between. Between. Okay? We got to take care of our own now. Someone who doesn't care to take care of our own is Jasmine Crockett. Okay? Jasmine Crack a lack a Crockett is back in the news. Okay? We want to talk about someone who's low IQ and just likes to pull publicity stunts. That is Jasmine Crockett. Well, she has gone viral over the weekend for saying that President Trump needs to deport white supremacist instead of these migrants from third world shitholes. So let's take a look at that clip.

Jasmine Crockett (28:48)

But now you want to go against every single immigrant. That doesn't make sense. And it's frankly not who we are. Because if that's the case, let's talk about the white supremacists and how many of them need to be kicked out of this country? Because I can guarantee you I can track down more crimes that they've committed because overall immigrants have a lower crime committal rate than white supremacists. But we don't want to talk about that in this country.

Lauren (29:12)

I mean, of course, I think almost all of us condemn white supremacists. Okay? I think we all condemn white supremacists. But how come Jasmine Crockett's rebuttal to everything is white people are the problem. You notice that every single issue is, oh, it's a white person. You want to deport Afghanistan nationals who try to destroy us and are shooting National Guardsmen. You're wrong, President Trump. You need to deport more white people. They're the ones committing crimes. They're the ones threatening us. We should pull up the statistics, okay? We should pull up the statistics of even black on black crime. Crime. Let's do black on black crime. Let's do black on white crime if we want to get into every single demographic and really go there. But Jasmine Crockett doesn't care about the facts. She cares about going viral, and she's a straight up idiot. Jasmine Crockett is probably the most uncouth, inarticulate women woman in American politics. Every time she opens her mouth, it's an utter calamity. She doesn't know the temperature of the room. She doesn't know the time of day. She can put on her pearls and do her hair and try to rebrand herself because she wants to run for Senate, which we'll get to in a second. But we will never stop seeing her, her as this ridiculous buffoon idiot. Okay? And I'm tired of the race baiting. I'm tired of the race baiting from everyone in politics, right? Everybody on the left. It's always, white people are the problem. This is the problem. One thing I love about the Republican Party right now, and I know there are Republicans and Maga and Maha and independents and former Democrats watching us right now, but we all got to admit the Republican Party is much more big tent, right? They are much more welcoming people from all different backgrounds. The Republican Party, when you even look at the RNC convention, it wasn't focused on everybody's race. And skin color, gender or ethnicity was like, tell me about the content of your character. Tell me about merit. But for the left, they're so focused on identity politics all the time, everybody is going to blame white people on the left, right? Every Democratic politician, if there's a problem, it's a white man's fault. It's a white guy's fault. How is that productive to helping our country? It's also not the truth, right? It's also not borne out in the data or reality whatsoever. And if Jasmine Crockett thinks this is going to Help her run for Senate in Texas. Good luck. I want to take a look at this clip where she's asked about running for Senate in my home state. So you still haven't made a decision?

Commercial Announcer 1 (31:20)

Because that's, to me that sounds like someone who is like this close.

Jasmine Crockett (31:23)

I, I, I am, I am closer to yes than I am no, I will tell you that. But regardless of what people think, strategy matters and execution matters. And there are a lot of people that don't believe in Texas. And so for me, if I am going to tell people that they need to believe in Texas, I need to not only have numbers on a piece of paper, I need to be able to tell them this is exactly how we're going to get there.

Lauren (31:49)

What does that even mean? There are people who don't believe in Texas. I'm from Texas. Half my family lives in Texas. So many of my friends live in Texas. I grew up in Texas, went to school in Texas, graduated high school there. What does this mean? People don't believe in Texas. And Jasmine Crockett is going to make people believe in Texas. People believe in Texas, okay? It's one of the most most prosperous, successful states in the entire country. Right. We have a great economy in Texas, we have great trade. Texas is being run like a well oiled machine. So I'm not sure what she means, people don't believe in Texas. I'd actually love to press Jasmine Crockett on that. Maybe I'll reach out to her team. What does she mean, people don't believe in Texas? Maybe she doesn't believe in Texas or maybe it's a Freudian slip that she doesn't believe in herself. But apparently her filing deadline to run for Senate is December 8th. So by next Monday we should know if Jasmine Crockett is running for Senate. And I hope she does. I hope Jasmine Crockett runs for Senate because I will be the one person calling her out every single day. I love my state. I love Texas. I love that we bleed red, white and blue there. I love all my family and my friends who are still back in Texas. So I am going to ride for Texas. If Jasmine Crockett runs for Senate, I.

Co-host/Commentator (32:59)

Am going to have my foot on.

Lauren (33:00)

Her neck every day calling her out. Starting with this comment about people not believing in Texas. But I want to move on on. I want to move on to Megan Markle. So Megan Markle has gone viral. Apparently she does not know how to prepare turkey or she does not know how to work in the kitchen with proper hygienic protocols. Because this video has gone viral all over the Internet where she is preparing a turkey. And apparently she kept her jewelry on and her hands aren't clean. And this is not good, okay? People online, chefs, and everybody on the Internet who loves to cook and knows about food and nutrition, they're all saying, saying, you can't keep your jewelry on. What is she doing? This does not look sanitary, but this is not a shock to me, right? Ms. Salmonella Sussex. I'm only angry that that's not a nickname I thought of, okay? But the Duchess of scam a lot, okay? The Duchess of Soho House, Meghan Markle. This is not a shock because as we've covered on here. And her flower petals, right? She posted a picture one time with these flower petals. They were like bugs and insects and the house didn't look clean in the documentary. So I'm not shocked. I've told you guys before, before, I think Meghan Markle, for her hygiene is a far second priority, okay? I think hygiene is way down the list of her priorities because she just seems like the type of person who maybe doesn't shower every day. She's kind of this California boho girl. Like maybe a week goes by and she hasn't washed her hair, she hasn't showered. And we've all.

Co-host/Commentator (34:21)

We've all been there during the pandemic, okay? During the pandemic. That doesn't count. Anything that happened in 20. 20, 2021, that doesn't count out.

Lauren (34:28)

But I just feel like Meghan Markle is not the cleanest person, okay? And Prince Harry, he's allegedly strung out on psychedelics. He doesn't know what the hell is going on. But if you invited me for dinner at Meghan Markle's house, number one, I would think it was a trap, okay? I'd have to have one of those food testers like the president and foreign leaders have.

Co-host/Commentator (34:45)

I'd have to have someone test my food.

Lauren (34:46)

If I went to Megan Markle's house, number one, I don't want salmonella. Number two, you know that bitch is going to poison me, okay? She sent me a candle. Meghan Markle sent me a candle with no wick. So I'm certainly not going to be eating the food at her house or her dwelling, okay? If I go to Meghan Markle's house, the candle doesn't have a wick, okay? The candle doesn't have a frickin wick. And you think the food is going to taste good? You think she knows how to prepare a Meal. She can't put a wick in a candle. Have I belabored the point? So, Meghan Markle, we wish you well in the kitchen. What's interesting, Meghan Markle couches herself as the next Martha Stewart. She really wants to be the next Martha Stewart. She wants to do home and lifestyle. She wants to be like Gwyneth Paltrow with goop. You know, Mother Goop, as I call her. But the thing is, Gwyneth Paltrow, whether we like her or not, whether she's ridiculous or not and out of touch, she is authentic Martha Stewart. She is authenticity in spades. I mean, the woman had an ankle bracelet and went to prison, okay? The woman has street credibility, okay? Martha Stewart has street cred. Way more street cred than I do, okay? Because when it comes to fight or flight, I flight, okay? I lock my doors when I'm sitting in a parking lot at Albertson's, okay?

Co-host/Commentator (35:48)

So Martha Stewart has much more street cred than I do.

Lauren (35:51)

But Meghan Markle, she's trying to be the Martha Stewart, the next Gwyneth Paltrow, but she doesn't even know how to properly prepare food in a hygienic, clean way. So I hope she never opens a restaurant. If you go to eat at Megan Markle's house, God bless you, it's like an episode of Fear Factor. You're playing with fire. You're playing with your life. Actually, eating at Megan Markle's house is like Russian roulette, okay?

Co-host/Commentator (36:11)

You don't know if you're going to get a stomach bug. You don't know if you're going to survive, if you're going to live to tell the tale. The kids are probably nowhere to be found. Archie and Lily ventures at. Where are you? Come out, come out, wherever you are. So, no, those kids are nowhere to be found. Harry strung out on psychedelics, and she's got her dirty, grimy fingers up the turkey's cooch.

Lauren (36:34)

So that is what's happening with her. Moving on. The last topic we have to discuss as it pertains to the real Royals, is that the Royals are planning to visit the United States to commemorate our. Our. What is it called? Seska Bicentennial or something?

Co-host/Commentator (36:50)

It's our 250th, okay? I'm not in Mensa either, okay? But I think it's our Susquehanna bicentennial. It's the 250th year. Yay. America at 250. You look good, bitch. You look good. But it's our 250th year. For some in our audience, you might.

Lauren (37:12)

Remember when America began.

Co-host/Commentator (37:15)

When America started and began.

Lauren (37:17)

But apparently the royals are coming to America.

Co-host/Commentator (37:20)

Much like the Eddie Murphy movie, they're.

Lauren (37:22)

Coming to America to celebrate this with us. Let me read you a little bit about what is going on. So they're planning to jet over to the United States to celebrate our 250th birthday. Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have allegedly been iced out. This is good. I don't want to see Prince Harry and Meghan Markle with the President. Okay? I don't think Prince Harry and Meghan Markle need to be near the President of the United States. United States, okay? In politics, there are already enough snakes and pit vipers and load out low down dirty scoundrels. We don't need these two little hucksters coming either. But Prince William and Catherine are apparently going to join in the historic celebration next July to commemorate the 250th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence. So this is going to be incredible. King Charles and Camilla have been invited to Washington, D.C. for a state visit in April, allegedly by President Trump in if the monarch's health allows him to come. We hope Charles is in good health. We hope Catherine is in good health as well. Obviously, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex aren't working royal, so they will not be invited to any celebrations. This is what a source told to Page Six. Any invitation would have to come at the behest of the Royal family themselves. I think this is going to be incredible. I really felt like Katherine got along with the first lady, Melania Trump. They went out with the scouts in UK recently. I believe this was in July or June. And so I'm so excited that they're going to be reunited. I think Charles and Camilla will have a great time here in the United States. President Trump is going to be the consummate host. And hopefully I will be there on the front row filming and covering everything with the press, because we all know I love the royal family and I love the pomp and the circumstance and the history and the tradition. And so it's nice to see that in pop culture there were a few years where President Trump was looked at as this boogeyman, right? People wouldn't go near him even if they liked him in private. Big public figures would sort of steer clear of him. Right? I love that. Now, William and Catherine and the King and Camilla, they're like, we like Trump. We're having a good time with Trump. We love Melania. We want to come hang out and celebrate the 250th of the United States of America. So I'm super, super excited to see all of that happen and unfold and we will have more updates as they come Ever read the label on a typical chip bag? It's a science experiment of seed oils, msg, dyes and vague natural flavors. Van de Crisps are part of the growing movement to bring back real food with just three ingredients. 100% pesticide free potatoes, sea salt and grass fed beef tallow. No junk, just real food. They taste amazing and leave you feeling light, energized and satisfied. No crash, bloat or mindless binging. My favorite flavor? Smokehouse Barbecue. Mmm. And if you love Vandy, you'll love Masa Chips, Vandy's sister brand. Their three ingredient tortilla chips are the best I've ever had. My Go To Flavor Original Ready to give Vandy or Masa a try? Use code link for 25% off your first order at vandycrisps.com or masachips.com or simply click the link in the video description or scan the QR code to claim this delicious offer. And if you don't feel like ordering online, Vandy and Masa are now available nationwide at your local Sprout supermarket. So stop by and pick up a couple of bags before they're gone.

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Lauren (40:53)

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Lauren (40:57)

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Lauren (41:39)

Well my friends, thanks for tuning in to Spot on with link. Lauren I absolutely love all of you. Okay? You guys are my Internet family. I really feel like our show is hitting its stride because so many of you share it. You send it to your friends. You leave comments and I read through through all the comments. Okay, I can't respond to every comment, but I do sit and I read through all of them and I take your critiques, I take your positivity and I weigh it all and I interpret all of it. And I'm so happy to be here with all of you. We will be back on Wednesday with a brand new episode but have an amazing start to your week. Happy December. Happy Holidays. We will see you on the next one. Bye.

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Lauren (42:59)

Clock.

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Lauren (43:09)

Oh man.

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Lauren (43:15)

Store? Really? Who knew? Okay, Was that you or the birds?

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