Stand to Reason Weekly Podcast

Host: Greg Koukl
Episode: Four Simple Skills to Help Your Kids Soar Above the Crowd
Date: March 5, 2025

Episode Overview

Greg Koukl returns to the studio after a medical leave, opening with reflections on recent events and quickly turning to the episode’s central theme: how parents (and adults themselves) can imbue children with four simple, foundational skills that make them stand out in today’s culture. According to Greg, these skills, once common, are now rare enough that anyone who develops them will “rise head and shoulders above” the rest. The episode explores the social, philosophical, and even theological importance of these virtues, offering both insight and practical wisdom.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Context and Generational Perspective

• Greg relates his upbringing as a Baby Boomer, shaped by parents who lived through the Depression—emphasizing how values like responsibility and maturity were ingrained through hardship.
• He critiques the current generation’s experience:

  “Kids are getting all kinds of goodies that they didn’t earn… they’re getting the privileges without the responsibilities that serve as a kind of ballast to their lives.” (09:27)

• Greg argues that while young people today face accelerated cultural exposure, they are not truly “growing up faster”—rather, their privileges outpace their sense of responsibility.

2. The Four Simple Skills

Greg introduces the four skills—virtues he claims have become rare, making them potent differentiators:

a. Say “please” and “thank you”

• “When I was a kid, those were called the magic words.” (13:03)
• The core insight: Politeness and gratitude are strikingly uncommon, and expressing them reflects humility and respect.

b. Show up on time

• Greg shares personal struggles with punctuality, influenced by a colleague’s honest feedback:

  “You got to fix this, because this is not a good quality. This is not presidential. It’s not grown up. It’s not mature. It’s not considerate to other people.” (15:31) — Melinda Penner (via Greg)

• He breaks down the psychology of habitual lateness and the need for intentional change, suggesting aiming for early arrival as a solution.
• Insight: Reliability and respect are communicated through punctuality; “People notice. It impresses them, and it sets you above the rank and file.” (17:35)

c. Do what you say you’re going to do

• Greg addresses empty promises—doing things to “get people off your back,” which erodes trust.
• He references Proverbs and Jesus’ words:

  “Let your yes be yes and your no be no.” (Matthew 5:37)

• Insight: Reliability is essential for trustworthiness and character.

d. Finish what you start

• Drawing from his childhood chores:

  “Don’t do it halfway. Don’t start and not finish. Do the job.” (18:18)

• Key point: Consistency in finishing demonstrates character and opens doors to future opportunities.

“You just have to do some basic things... if your kids do [these], they will stand head and shoulders above everyone else.” (11:38)

3. Why These Skills Matter

• Greg stresses that these skills are not only for children but for adults—especially millennials—who may have missed them.
• Building these patterns cultivates maturity and equips believers to serve as ambassadors for Christ through their example.

4. Listener Q&A: Engaging Topics

Time and God (Tom, 20:50)

• Tom asks about A-theory vs. B-theory of time and God’s relation to it—can God experience time differently than us?
• Greg’s answer boils down to metaphysical consistency:

  “You can’t have two different natures of reality. You can’t have one essential reality for God and a different essential reality for human beings.” (22:57)

• Greg outlines the common-sense, “A-theory” view (time passes with past, present, future) and critiques “B-theory” (all times equally real, no true “now”), supporting William Lane Craig’s view that God was atemporal prior to creation and became temporal at creation’s moment.
• Notable Quote:

  “If God is outside of time, he doesn’t do anything… if you act, then the moment after you act, the act is in the past, which is temporal.” (28:50)

Saint vs. Sinner Perspective (Rebecca, 34:00)

• Rebecca from Calgary asks whether Christians should view themselves primarily as saints or sinners.
• Greg says both are true:

  “I am deeply fallen and my life manifests my fallenness on a regular basis. But I also know the trajectory that I’m on and that I am rescued, I am forgiven, I am cleansed.” (39:52)

• He urges a balanced identity—neither despairing in sinfulness nor naive about ongoing temptation.
• Scripture invoked:

  “If any man’s in Christ, he’s a new creature. Old things have passed away and new things have come.” (36:36)

• Insight: Embrace both humility (as a sinner) and assurance (as a saint).

“The Universe Did It” (Jake, 46:28)

• Jake asks how to respond to a friend who ascribes answered prayers or fate to “the universe.”
• Greg recommends Columbo-style questioning:

  “What do you mean by the universe in the way that you’re using it… how is [it] an adequate explanation?” (48:07)

• He argues that merely invoking “the universe” is a placeholder, lacking the explanatory power or intelligence the conversation is about.
• Strategy: Request clarity and gently expose the incoherence by asking the friend to define terms and connect them to causation.

Early Church as Authority (Paul, 52:53)

• Paul wonders why tradition should look to the early church for doctrine when disputes and heresy arose even then.
• Greg affirms the value of early testimony but cautions:

  “[The Fathers] can give us insight just like any other Bible teacher… but ultimately, the standard has to be the Scripture, all right?” (54:28)

• He insists all teachings must be measured against the text—this is Sola Scriptura.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Politeness:

  “Please. Thank you. The magic words. Very simple, very, very basic.” (13:13) — Greg

• On Punctuality:

  “The safest thing is to plan always to get there early. Shoot for 15 minutes early… It’s an action that you do that is a reflection of your character and your concern and consideration for other people.” (16:45)

• On Integrity:

  “You want to be a person that people can count on. And by the way, that’s not so hard.” (17:58)

• On Early Church Authority:

  “Are you saying the early Church fathers were wrong? Yes. Based on what authority? The authority of the text.” (54:48)

• Encouragement:

  “You want to be a good ambassador… build these virtues into your life. And most of them are easy… You just have to make a decision that you’re going to get moving before you’re late.” (18:18)

Timestamps for Major Segments

• 00:00–11:37 — Greg’s medical update, cultural reflection, setup for the main topic
• 11:37–18:24 — The Four Simple Skills: Explanation, commentary, and personal anecdotes
• 20:50–34:00 — Listener Q&A: Philosophy of Time, God’s relationship to temporality
• 34:00–44:12 — Listener Q&A: Identity as Saint vs. Sinner in Christian life
• 46:28–52:53 — Listener Q&A: Responding to New Age “universe” explanations
• 52:53–54:54 — Listener Q&A: Why (or whether) early Church precedent is authoritative
• 54:54–End — Closing remarks

Conclusion

Greg Koukl’s message is clear: Building exceptional character in yourself and your kids does not depend on grand gestures, but on the consistent practice of simple virtues—politeness, reliability, follow-through, and faithfulness. In a culture where these have become rare, nurturing these habits will set you apart and prepare you to represent Christ well. The episode ends with challenging, thoughtful responses to listener questions on theology, Christian identity, apologetics, and the authority of tradition—reminding believers to think carefully, live graciously, and ground all convictions in Scripture.