Transcript
A (0:00)
Sa. Well, hello, friends. Greg Kokel here, and I'm glad to be back with you. I've been on kind of medical leave for the last few weeks now. You don't know that because probably because we've, we put shows in the can before I leave. The thing about my job is I always have to do my job, even when I have time off. So we got, we anticipated that and that's what you've been hearing. But I'm new in the studio now since the beginning of February and now it's the beginning of March. So I've missed a few weeks here, had some back surgery and apparently that news got out. I don't know if I mentioned it or not, but I've had people tell me they've been praying for me. Back at Sweet Gal Church last weekend told me that she kind of pretty much dedicated a whole day to prayer for the surgery. And it's good that she did. The way I look at it, prayer is always good. But I actually had some difficulties. I just needed a fusion for L4, L5. And people with back problems know what that means. But there was a few complications that took longer than they thought. But I, I did end up coming out okay. Although it was a four, four and a half, five hour surgery. I went in at 7:30. When I woke up, it was 4:30. I actually told the people there that were working with me, I said, your clock's wrong. They said, no, it's right. You've just been gone for about eight hours or so. I didn't know I was down, but things are looking up and moving forward. This is a slow heal as characteristic of back surgery like fusions. I got three months of no blt, no bending, lifting or twisting. And so they gave me a brace, the whole deal. And anyway, I'm moving forward. So thank you for your prayers. For those who did pray. We had an unbelievable weekend last weekend in Dallas, so I didn't go there. And in fact, in Philly, I won't be able to do that either because I was just. My doctors grounded me for those trips, but they were, we were full to the gills at about 3,000, I think it was like 3,005. And it turned out that is the event that we live stream, which means if you missed it, you can still livestream it. I think it's available. And there were 3,000 that were watching on Livestream. So we were, we had a, you know, 6,000. That's like the record for us if you count the livestream. But it was A great conference. And we got one coming up in a few weeks in Philly and March 21st and 22nd. Last I heard, we had about, about 70 seats left. Alright. So you might want to get on board with that if you are in the Philly area. It's a fabulous conference. Jay Warner Wallace, Jason Jimenez, Megan Allman and our whole team, obviously. And some have said this is the best reality we've ever done. We'll also be in Dayton, Ohio on the 25th and 26th of April. We're almost sold out for Philly and that's a month away, three weeks. Dayton, Ohio. We're about eight weeks or seven weeks out and we've got about 500 that are signed up for that. We can hold 1500. So all the information is@realityapologetics.com reality apologetics.com and you can check that out if you like. Let's see, I, I was talking with my, the staff today about growing up and I was thinking about the status of young people today, which I think. I mean, I was born in 1950 and so I have a whole. I'm a boomer. Right at the front end of the boomers, actually. And my perspective on life is very different. So my mom and my dad, they lived through the Depression. My mom lived in the projects in Chicago. My dad was an orphan. They were Both born in 1929. By the time he was 10, he had lost his parents in a car crash. And so they were kind of cut from a certain cloth. And that had a big influence on me and the rest of us and our family. Good influence. I'm glad for that influence. Okay. And when I think about young people today, I hear people making statements like, will kids grow up, up so fast nowadays? Kids grow up so fast. And as I thought about that, I actually don't think that's true now. I think that the person who makes the statement is onto something. They are observing something that's real, but it isn't growing up. What they're observing is the way the culture has been velocitized. So younger people are facing the kinds of things that a generation or two before, young people would be older when they faced it. Okay? But they're getting it younger. And here's the way I would characterize it, that younger people today are getting the privileges of earlier. You know, when I was a kid, it's like you got responsibilities and responsibilities earn you privileges. My dad says, you're older, you get more privileges, but you got more responsibilities. And the two go together. But now here, what I've seen is the privileges are being dished out. Kids are getting all kinds of goodies that they didn't earn. And so they're getting the privileges without the responsibilities that serve as a kind of ballast to their lives. And so, consequently, because they're getting the privileges without the responsibilities, they are being corrupted. They're getting the privileges early, but they're not taking the responsibilities that go with that. And this is not good for them. So as I was thinking about this the other day, I remembered something I read somewhere that was suggested as a bromide or as a. Maybe that's not the best word as a corrective. That is, the young people are, in a certain sense, by comparison to other generations, are so much less mature. It is not hard to rise above them for our young people. So if you're raising your kids and raising a family, it's not really hard to have your kids be head and shoulders above everyone else. You just have to do some basic things. And this particular person, I can't tell you who it was or even where I heard it or read it, but it immediately registered with me when this person said, there are four things that if your kids do that aren't hard, that they will stand head and shoulders above everyone else. So I want to share those four things with you because they're not just for our kids. Many of the adults listening are millennials. And consequently, in some of these four things, you may be lacking, though it's not hard to repair that. And so I'm offering these things with some commentary attached so that you can think about pursuing these particular things in your own life and investing in the lives of others, especially your own children, so that they can have this kind of foundation of maturity. And it turns out each one of these things is characteristic of a maturing person, a person who their executive skills, their capability of dealing with life well is increasing. The kind of thing that was very characteristic, I think, of younger generations because the world was different, but are lacking now in more recent generations. So this could be for your kids. It also could be for you as well. Okay, here are the four things. The first one, say please and thank you. That's hard, right? Say please and thank you. When I was a kid, those were called the magic words. And my folks would say, hey, don't forget the magic words. What are the magic words? Please and thank you. In other words, ask politely and be grateful when something is given to you. Ask politely. You don't act like something is owed to you. You Ask for it. Realizing that it's a favor if somebody does it for you, probably. And because it's a favor when somebody does it for you, then you can express gratitude for what is given to you. Please. Thank you. The magic words. All right. And very simple, very, very basic. Second, first, say please and thank you. Second, show up on time. Show up on time. Now, for some of us, this is hard to do because we've developed a habit of not doing that. And I will say autobiographically, that was a circumstance that I struggled with for a long time. And it wasn't until Melinda Penner, who was the co founder of standard reason, almost 32 years ago, and my conscience somewhat, as our executive director for me as a president, she said to me, you got to fix this, because this is not a good quality. This is not presidential. It's not grown up. It's not mature. It's not considerate to other people. We got to be able to count on you. If we say we're going to have a meeting at this time, you got to be there. Now, obviously, there are exceptions to this, but in my case, I was almost always 15 minutes late. And some of you may be able to relate to this. By the way, did it occur to you that if you're always 15 minutes late, you are very consistent to a certain time? The problem is that the time you're consistent to on a regular basis is just late. And had you started 15 minutes earlier in every one of those occasions and conducted yourself the same way, you would have been on time every time. The point is, this is solvable. And I realized that for myself, and I think this is true of a lot of people like this. I was not motivated by being on time. I was motivated by not being too late. And 15 minutes late wasn't too late. Now, a half hour, that was too late, so I'd be motivated. I realized I'm a little bit late, but I'm not 15 minutes late yet. Okay, now I gotta get going. And then I'd be consistently 15 minutes late. What I had to do was to simply make an adult decision to stop that and to plan to be not just on time. The safest thing is to plan to always get there early. Shoot for 15 minutes early. Now, some people think, well, what a waste of time. It's not a waste of time because it's an action that you do that is a reflection of your character and your concern and consideration for other people. So they're not waiting on you, for one. It is also something that gives you margin. You know how it is. If you're always late, you're frantic. You can't have anything get in the way of the time that's left. You get a traffic jam, mom, my goodness. And then you say, oh, I'm sorry. Gosh, the traffic was so bad. Well, that wasn't the problem. The problem was that you left so late that if there was a little traffic, now you're late. And if you would have taken consideration for that possibility and built some margin, you would have been on time. Even in spite of some of the problems that pop up now. That's just being a grown up. Although I was older and an adult of sorts, I wasn't acting like a grown up in that area. And I will say this, and Melinda told me this. This is hard to change. Most people who are consistently late never change. But as it turned out, with her coaching and encouragement and my resolve, I changed. And it's made a tremendous amount of difference. Now. Am I late once in a while? Sure. I was late this morning a half hour, but that's because of traffic. And it's what, an hour and 15 or hour and a half drive? I left two hours early, but it took me two and a half hours to get here. So sometimes you can't control that. But if you develop the habit, especially as a young person, to always show up on time, guess what that does. People notice. It impresses them, and it sets you above the rank and file. So first, say please and thank you. Second, show up on time. Here's the third one. Do what you say you're going to do. Just do what you say you're going to do. Now, there are some people that say they're going to do stuff because they're trying to get other people off their back, but they really have no deep intention to do what they say they're going to do. At least not in a timely fashion. Maybe eventually. But they don't want people poking at them and asking them for this or that. Oh, yeah, I'll take care of that. Which is just another way of saying, get out of my hair, get out of my face, go away. And then they don't do it. When you don't do what you say you're going to do, people understand that you are not a reliable person. It is not a good idea for you to traffic with others doing important things if they are not reliable. You know, the book of proverbs is thick with these references to fools who are not reliable. You give this job to a fool. Are you kidding me? You can't count on that person. There's different ways that Proverbs expresses that concern, but that's the heart of it. You want to be a person that people can count on. And by the way, that's not so hard. Here's the way Jesus put it. Let your yes be yes and your no be no. In other words, speak in a straightforward, forthright way and do what you say you're going to do. All right? Don't say, oh, I'll do that. Oh, I will. I swear that I'll do it. He said, don't swear. That sounds like you have two different standards of truthfulness. If you swear, then you got to really be truthful. But if you don't say the swear thing, then you just do the. You know, you can say whatever you want. You don't have to mean it. That's not good. Like your yes, B, yes, your no, B, yo, finally finish what you start. Just finish what you start. I remember my own dad just emphasizing this. There were lots of chores that we had to do when I was a kid. I was responsible for the yard. That's part of it. We did more obviously. And my dad would emphasize, don't do it halfway. Don't start and not finish. Do the job. If you do the job, then people see that and they draw conclusions about your character based on how you perform in a reliable fashion. And that also may influence them wanting to employ you in some fashion because you're a person they can count on. Or, let's just walk it back. You're a person who says please and thank you, who shows up on time, who does what you say you're going to do, and who finishes what you start. Simple things, very basic, not profound. At one time in our history, part of the warp and woof of growing up, it was all built in. And those who were responsible showed those characteristics. But now it's like. It seems like it's hardly emphasized because those characteristics are not much in evidence in the rank and file. And not just kids, young people, adults as well. All right, you want to be a good ambassador. You want to reflect Christ well to the rest of the world. Build these virtues into your life. And most of them are easy. The time thing is a little harder, but it can be overcome. I know because I did it. You just have to make a decision that you're going to get moving before you're late. Something like that. All right. Hey, let's take a break. We'll be back with your calls when I Return on Stand to Reason do.