Podcast Summary: Staying Alive — "Go Find Some Failure" (w/ Chris Gethard)
Podcast: Staying Alive with Jon Gabrus & Adam Pally
Episode Title: Go Find Some Failure (w/ Chris Gethard)
Date: December 4, 2025
Host Network: SmartLess Media
Episode Overview
In this episode, comedians and longtime friends Jon Gabrus and Adam Pally sit down with Chris Gethard—comedian, writer, and advocate for mental health—to discuss the intersection of comedy, mental and physical health, aging, and the relentless pursuit of self-improvement (and the limits thereof). With the trademark raw honesty and humor typical of Staying Alive, the hosts and Gethard revisit wild stories from their pasts, reflect on how their relationships with substances and self-care have changed, and dig into why embracing failure and humility is vital to staying "alive" in every sense.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Journey: From Partying to Wellness
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Early Years & Party Culture:
- The group recalls their 20s in New York: late-night meals, drinking at McManus, and eating food cart delicacies at 2 a.m. ([04:02]–[05:46]).
- They reflect on how their lifestyles have shifted, emphasizing how unsustainable those habits are in their 40s.
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Sobriety & Family History:
- Chris shares the story of quitting drinking at 21 after a series of troubling incidents and a family history riddled with alcoholism ([07:02]–[09:27]).
- Memorable moment: Waking up on the McManus men’s room floor, chased off 7th Ave by “Satan in a clown wig,” which became a wakeup call ([08:05]).
"I came from a family of drinkers… my mom's family was so beyond the pale riddled with alcoholism when she grew up." — Chris Gethard [08:35]
- The conversation covers different ways men and women address mental health: therapy vs. exercise ([03:27]–[04:02]).
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Addictive Tendencies & Obsession:
- Chris and Adam discuss obsessive personalities, and the danger (and utility) of channeling obsession into positive habits instead of self-destruction ([13:56]–[14:51]).
"I am at my best when I point [my obsessive tendencies] in a healthy direction instead of trying to conquer them or pretend they're not there." — Chris Gethard [14:07]
2. Finding Healthy Outlets: Jiu Jitsu, Comedy, and Humility
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Discovering Jiu Jitsu to Tame the Mind:
- Chris details his journey into Brazilian Jiu Jitsu as an alternative outlet for his energy, anger, and mania. The physical and mental challenge keeps him present in a way nothing else did ([15:00]–[22:21]).
"When there is legit a 26-year-old kid who's on steroids... covered in prison tattoos... you're not thinking about your to-do list." — Chris Gethard [21:58]
- Jiu Jitsu's community roots, its transformation from underground nerd haven to "crypto bro" cliché, and what made it so special for the group in 2006 ([16:09]–[17:38]).
- A hilarious and memorable retelling of Gabrus and Eli's unskilled, bear-like sparring sessions, which became legendary in the NYC Jiu Jitsu gym ([37:36]–[39:32]).
"They would make Chewbacca noises and fight each other for hours. It was like pro wrestling almost." — Chris Gethard [39:01]
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Addiction to "The Limit":
- The hosts reflect on their mutual craving to be pushed to their limits—physically and mentally—through things like Jiu Jitsu, Bikram Yoga, and even standup and improv ([24:33]–[32:00]).
- Chris acknowledges his need for humility and failure in an otherwise praise-driven career ([26:45]–[27:45]).
"I love being humbled. Not everybody does... but I think a lot of people would be well served to do something that reminds them that you're not the fucking shit, dude." — Chris Gethard [27:14]
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Improv, Failure, and Growth:
- The group discusses improv as the ultimate leveler—no matter how seasoned or famous, you’re always a line away from bombing ([28:14]–[30:08]).
- Improv and sports as healthy training grounds for humility, teamwork, and learning to lose ([35:28]–[36:33]).
- Notably, Gabrus is praised as a rare improviser comfortable being a rookie and willing to fail for the sake of learning ([33:02]–[33:43]).
3. Balance, Identity, and the Reality of Success
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Career Recognition, Fame, and Staying Grounded:
- The trio talk about sustaining a sense of self in show business—Adam is praised for his humility and perseverance despite achieving fame ([45:55]–[47:44]).
"You're the only person I know that took it to the level you took it where then consistently your morals kept—you kept doubling down on your morals and being like, 'No, no, no, no... Good person has to come first.'" — Chris Gethard to Adam Pally [46:46]
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Cheat Days & Treats: The Reality Check:
- Chris admits to battling workaholism and food obsession, sometimes using food as a reward for sobriety ([49:34]–[49:58]).
- Gethard also discusses the evolution in his values after becoming a parent—a shift from self-focus to family and community ([50:12]–[50:51]).
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Isolation and Regret:
- An honest reflection from Chris about being stricter with himself than necessary and sometimes self-isolating, leading to distance from friends ([51:25]–[52:31]).
4. Service, Community, and Living for the Plot
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New Obsession: Volunteering as an EMT
- For the past three years, Chris has been volunteering and driving an ambulance—a daily, anonymous way to serve community and find humility (and stories) ([58:18]–[59:51]).
"Again, it's all balance. It's like I'm hyper focused on family. Family, family. Like, no, community as well." — Chris Gethard [58:34]
"You are for the plot in this way that is like positive. Community, friendship, household." — Adam Pally [59:28]
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Why Balance and Failure Matter
- The group concludes that seeking out humility, embracing new challenges, and leaving space for failure are key to staying healthy—mentally, physically, and artistically ([57:47]–[58:04]).
"Go find some failure. I think that's a real part of health." — Chris Gethard [58:01]
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Teaching, Legacy, and Giving Back:
- Gethard reflects on his influence as a teacher and mentor, bridging UCB’s countercultural roots with newer generations and helping people find their voices ([46:45]–[61:57]).
Memorable Quotes
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On Addiction and Growth:
"Moderation's never been my thing. But... even my positive habits, I sort of had to train myself to go like, okay, I have some addictive or obsessive tendencies, and I am at my best when I point them in a healthy direction." — Chris Gethard [13:56] -
On Humility:
"I think a lot of people would be well served to do something that reminds them that you're not the fucking shit, dude." — Chris Gethard [27:14] -
On Balance:
"You can be this, but that isn’t necessarily the sum of all your parts." — Jon Gabrus [64:19]
Notable Moments & Timestamps
- [08:05] Chris’s drunken episode at McManus and moment of clarity
- [14:07] Gethard discussing harnessing obsession in positive ways
- [21:58] On why martial arts provides mental clarity
- [27:14] Gethard on why it's good to get humbled
- [33:02] Gabrus on being okay with being bad at something if it's enjoyable
- [39:01] The legendary “bear-like” Jiu Jitsu matches between friends
- [46:46] Chris praises Adam for remaining grounded after fame
- [49:34] Chris on food as a vice and post-sobriety treat
- [58:01] “Go find some failure” - the thematic thesis of the episode
- [58:18] Gethard’s new outlet: volunteering as an EMT
- [59:28] Adam on living "for the plot" and using that drive for good
Tone & Atmosphere
The tone of the episode is irreverent, candid, supportive, and deeply personal. The hosts and guest are unafraid to share their struggles and dark sides but continually steer the conversation toward growth, humility, and service to others—all with plenty of laughs and inside references for comedy fans.
Key Takeaways
- Addiction doesn’t disappear, but it can be steered.
- Humility is essential to growth—find something you’re bad at.
- Balance isn’t static; it’s a constant adjustment.
- Service, teaching, and giving back are critical to personal fulfillment.
- Embrace your history, but don’t be defined by it.
- You are more than your biggest success or failure—keep exploring new limits.
For longtime fans, comics, or anyone wrestling with the tension between ambition and well-being, this is a quintessential Staying Alive episode—funny, vulnerable, and loaded with blunt truth.
