The Horrible Pizza/Demons

Summary

Story Pirates – "The Horrible Pizza / Demons"

Podcast: Story Pirates
Episode: The Horrible Pizza / Demons
Date: December 11, 2025
Host: Story Pirates Team
Featured Kid Authors: Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar

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Episode Overview

This energetic and imaginative episode features the Story Pirates crew adapting and performing two delightfully inventive stories written by kids: "The Horrible Pizza" by Hayley and Kian (ages 7 and 9) and "Demons" by Ira (age 8). The show celebrates National Referee Day with referee Smitty overseeing friendly (and silly) competitions, comical penalty calling, and a spirit of creative camaraderie. As always, the team spotlights the authors’ storytelling techniques through interviews, and wraps up with the beloved "StoryLove" segment—reading and riffing on more kid-submitted works.

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Key Segments, Discussions & Highlights

1. National Referee Day & Smitty’s Spotlight (02:29–05:40)

• Smitty’s Routine: Smitty begins his day with quirky rituals (ice water dunk, secret referee jersey) and assumes no one remembers the holiday just for him.
• The Crew’s Surprise: The Pirates surprise Smitty with a diamond whistle and a day full of refereeing their invented competitions.
• Lighthearted banter about penalties, referee authority, and Smitty’s particular brand of attention.
• Notable Quote:
  • Smitty (04:18): "This is the most thoughtful present I've ever received. Yeah, that's a two minute penalty for excess celebration."
  • Lee Overtree (05:34): "Wow, he is harsh but fair."

2. Sketch & Song: "The Horrible Pizza" (05:41–13:53)

The Story

• Premise: Two siblings recount a restaurant’s rise from serving "the horrible pizza" to culinary greatness.
• Comedic use of flashbacks, double flashbacks, montages, and flash forwards—gleefully breaking narrative conventions.
• Memorable Moments:
  • The manager’s confession to hiring two random, unqualified chefs.
  • Montage of new chef Bob making pizza to the tune of "The Wheels on the Bus."
  • A far-future flash-forward: “long white beards” and a pizza ruined by an ancient beard hair.
  • "The End" after a restaurant closure due to unforeseen time-travel side effects.

Notable Quotes

• Rachel as Manager (07:00): "Pizza."
• Lee Overtree as Bob (10:01): "A good pizza, huh? Give me a 2 1/2 minute montage and I'll show you the perfect pizza. So perfect they'll talk about it in the future."
• Bob’s pizza song (10:58): "You put the dough on the baking sheet, baking sheet, baking sheet..."
• Smitty, closing (13:53): "And now Lee speaks with the author."

Interview with Hayley & Kian (14:00–18:09)

• Origin: Inspired by a 1am visit to “Little Italy Pizza” in NYC.
• Techniques: They discuss why they used narrative devices ("flashbacks, montage, flash forward")—to reveal more about characters and outcomes.
• Live Performance: The authors sing their "Wheels on the Bus"-style pizza song.
• Memorable Quote:
  • Hayley & Kian (16:33): "Oh, how about like, the Wheels on the Bus song, but like, a different way?"
  • Lee Overtree (17:44): "That was incredible."

3. Smitty’s Silly Competitions (18:11–23:25)

• Kefir Hold Up (18:28): Lee vs. Rachel compete to hold bottles of kefir while being distracted. Lee smashes his; Rachel wins by lifting the whole pallet.
  • Eric: "Did I not mention I competed for the US Olympic weightlifting team in 2001? No. Weren’t those Olympics in 2000? That was a major factor in why I didn't medal." (19:40)
• Food Math (19:56): Peter & Eric solve (or eat) a math problem. The answer? "Pi!"
  • Smitty (21:02): "That is correct. What circumference divided by diameter does equal the number pi?"

4. "Dramatic Reading" Showdown (23:32–27:00)

• Megan and Eric compete in over-the-top dramatic readings:
  • Megan dramatically recites Spice Girls lyrics as “Hamlet.”
  • Eric is given Megan’s personal diary entry as material.
• Argument over penalty calls escalates until everyone is ejected.
• Ending: Smitty finds a cake that says "Happy Referee Day—Enjoy your alone time," revealing the crew's understanding and appreciation.

5. Sketch & Song: "Demons" (27:48–35:48)

The Story

• Premise: A family road trip to the Grand Canyon devolves into comical chaos as family members (and others) “turn into demons” under travel stress. Amusingly mirrors real-life family vacation tension.
• Chemistry and Potions: Amy tries to reverse the “curse” via a science kit; partial success, but shenanigans continue.
• Relatable Humor: Sibling bickering, “Are we there yet?”, sunscreen drama, and parental demands for the “perfect holiday card photo.”
• Notable Quotes:
  • Rachel (32:02): "Now everybody look like you love each other and say cheese."
  • Lee Overtree (33:07): "Mom's a demon now too."
  • Amy (34:47): "Wow. I've never been more proud to be part of this family. Here goes nothing."
  • Classic punchline: "Beezy, you still have a tail." (34:50)

6. StoryLove Segment (36:08–46:44)

More Kid Stories & Analysis

• "I Want to Marry a Dog" (by Sophie, 10, MA): A heartfelt and humorous poem that escalates to high stakes when aliens attack.
  • Lee Overtree (38:04): "We talk about creating obstacles to your goal because you don't want to just be able to marry a dog right away...if there is a huge obstacle...then now we're talking a story."
• "The Blinker Butt Horse" (Cedar, 6, MN): A horse solves transit woes with butt blinkers, grappling with feelings of being different.
  • Peter McNerney (40:49): "And the man made it to work on time. From then on, the horse loved his left and his...blinker butt."
• "Ice Cream Gas" (Marina, 5, TX): A wild journey as kids' cars run on ice cream and hot dog gas—detours and airplane trips ensue.
  • Peter McNerney (43:36): "Can you travel with tubs of gasoline?"
  • Lee Overtree (44:49): "If the sun's on this side, I'm the one with the hot door all the time..."

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Memorable Quotes & Timestamps

• Smitty: "This is the most thoughtful present I've ever received. Yeah, that's a two minute penalty for excess celebration." (04:18)
• Lee Overtree as Bob: "A good pizza, huh? Give me a 2 1/2 minute montage and I'll show you the perfect pizza." (10:01)
• Child Author: "Oh, how about like, the Wheels on the Bus song, but like, a different way?" (16:33)
• Smitty: "You're outta here. And you're outta here. And you, and you and you. You're all outta here." (26:33)
• Lee Overtree: "Now everybody look like you love each other and say cheese." (32:02)
• Peter McNerney: "And the man made it to work on time. From then on, the horse loved his left and his...blinker butt." (40:49)

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Episode Takeaways

• The Story Pirates excel at transforming children's narratives into rich, absurdist comedy and music—honoring the kid-authors' ideas while amplifying them theatrically.
• This episode playfully tackles themes of individuality, creative problem-solving, family togetherness (and discord!), and the joys of imaginative storytelling.
• Through interviews and live readings, the show affirms—creativity grows when kids are encouraged to experiment with form and voice.
• Above all, Story Pirates radiates joy: in zany games, lyric parodies, improvisational storytelling, and unfiltered kid logic.

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Listen If...

• You love absurd humor, musical sketches, and inventive stories far outside the adult imagination.
• You want to encourage children's creative writing or need inspiration for family storytelling time.
• You crave wholesome, laugh-out-loud content that appeals to all ages and spotlights the unlimited possibilities of kid imagination.

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Find More

• Submit stories or learn about volunteer programs: storypirates.com
• Longer versions of StoryLove: YouTube Page details are in the show notes.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Peter McNerney]

Lemonade.

[Lee Overtree]

Hey, grown ups. Lee here. Welcome back to season eight and another brand new episode. Before we start, I'd like to take just a minute here to ask for your help with finishing our season. We want to be honest with our listeners that it is a really challenging time right now for educational media providers, including kids and family podcasts like Story Pirates. Unless we're able to raise more funds, this season could unfortunately be a short one. We've already received so many responses from all of you about this, so thank you so much to everybody that has already donated and reached out. It means so much, but if you haven't had a chance to help yet, we're still offering for the first time personalized videos from us to you. That's right. For your text deductible donation, we'll send you your kids, whoever in your life you think will appreciate it. Probably your kids, let's be honest. A personalized video saying hello, Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, whatever you like. You can choose a video from me or Peter or Megan or Nimini or Eric or even Rolo. This is the only time we've ever offered this and we're not going to be offering it again anytime soon. So this is your chance. Get the video for that special imaginative kid in your life and help the Story Pirates finish our season. And if you're hearing all of this and you have more significant resources to spare, we'd love to talk to you and have a conversation about becoming accredited producer on the show. If that sounds like you, drop us a line. And of course, all donations, like I said, are completely tax deductible. Get your personalized video or get in touch about a larger [e-mail] support that link is also in the show notes for today's episode. All right, thanks for listening to all of that and thanks for all of your support onto the show. After a few more words for the grownups.

[Smitty]

Time to wake up and start my morning routine. First, I dunk my head into this giant bucket of ice water.

That's good. Next, I put on my emergency referee jersey that I secretly wear under my clothes at all times. Then I check my calendar. It's National Referee Day already. If I forgot, I suppose it's too much to expect that the rest of the story Pirates remembered. Eh, maybe it's for the best. It's hard for them to understand that a curmudgeonly old introvert like me only wants a very certain kind and amount of attention. It's okay. They Forgot.

[Rachel]

Smitty, don't you dare think that we forgot that today is national referee day.

[Eric Erson]

Story Pirates, get ready for the most smittiest referee day ever devised.

[Smitty]

Oh, I don't know. I'm not sure we get you.

[Lee Overtree]

Think again.

[Peter McNerney]

Smit. Word.

[Lee Overtree]

J. Smittens in.

[Smitty]

That is not my name.

[Lee Overtree]

Each of us has devised a different style of competition. And only the highest caliber referee, one who's not afraid to dish out harsh but fair judgments, is suited for the job.

[Eric Erson]

What do you say, Smitty?

[Smitty]

Rachel, why are you getting down on one knee? What's in the little box?

A diamond whistle?

[Eric Erson]

Smitty, will you be our referee?

[Smitty]

Let me get this straight. You want me to come out of my room, spend the whole day judging you and your ridiculous games just to come back here and be alone again?

[Peter McNerney]

Smitty, that's exactly what we're saying.

[Smitty]

This is the most thoughtful present I've ever received. Yeah, that's a two minute penalty for excess celebration.

[Peter McNerney]

Oh, he's good.

[Smitty]

Wow.

[Eric Erson]

I love Story Pirates.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

It just filled me up with joy.

[Smitty]

My mom loves the jokes.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Oh, how about like, the Wheels on the Bus song, but like, a different way? And then he started making improv. I definitely think I can be more creative now. I'm the champion.

[Eric Erson]

The Story Pirates.

[Smitty]

All right, everybody, welcome back to the Story Pirates podcast, where we take stories written by kids and turn them into sketch comedy and songs. Eric, that's a two minute penalty for interrupting the reference. But that's another two for delay of game.

[Rachel]

Okay, but can I just.

[Smitty]

Two more for arguing with the ref.

[Rachel]

Arguing.

[Smitty]

Arm. Sportsmanlike. Conduct.

[Rachel]

Butt.

[Smitty]

I can do this all day, Eric. Is that what you want?

[Lee Overtree]

Ugh, no.

[Smitty]

Now into the box and we'll see you in eight minutes.

[Rachel]

Fine.

[Peter McNerney]

Wow, he is harsh but fair.

[Smitty]

While we wait for Eric, why don't we listen to a story?

[Lee Overtree]

Yeah.

[Eric Erson]

What was that a penalty for?

[Smitty]

Nothing. I just really like this whistle. And here to introduce their story is the author.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Hi, I'm Hayley, and I'm seven years old. And I'm Keanu. And I'm nine years old. We're from California. This is our story. The horrible pizza.

[Rachel]

Order up. Here's your pizza, fresh out of the oven.

[Eric Erson]

It smells delicious.

[Lee Overtree]

Oh, wow. This is the best pizza I've ever had.

[Rachel]

Ah, Grouchy, Grouchy.

[Eric Erson]

I'm sure people have always told you how great your food is.

[Peter McNerney]

Well.

[Eric Erson]

And your restaurant's always been super popular.

[Lee Overtree]

Well.

[Eric Erson]

And I bet you've never served a horrible pizza.

[Rachel]

You're wrong.

Escusi. The truth is, I did serve horrible pizza all those many years ago.

[Lee Overtree]

Is this a flashback?

[Peter McNerney]

Yes.

[Rachel]

And what can I get you two siblings here at my Italian restaurant in the past?

[Eric Erson]

Well, I know what my brother Keon here wants.

[Lee Overtree]

And I know what my sister Haley wants.

[Rachel]

And what is that?

[Lee Overtree]

One large pizza.

[Rachel]

Pizza.

[Lee Overtree]

Are you okay?

[Eric Erson]

You look like we just asked you for something you can't deliver.

[Rachel]

No, it's fine. I definitely have pizza, and it's great. You wait right here, and I'll be back with a very good pizza. Coming right up.

And here you go. One large pizza. If you need anything, just call my name. The manager.

[Eric Erson]

That's your name?

[Rachel]

C. Buon appetito.

[Eric Erson]

Hey, Keon, who's gonna dig into that large pizza first?

[Lee Overtree]

Same time. One, two, three, chomp.

Manager.

[Peter McNerney]

Whoa.

[Lee Overtree]

Why are you getting on the table?

[Rachel]

Is this about the pizza?

[Eric Erson]

Yes. Why is it so bad?

[Rachel]

Oh, I knew it would be bad.

[Eric Erson]

Yeah. Who made this?

[Rachel]

My two worthless chefs.

[Lee Overtree]

If they're worthless, why did you hire them?

[Rachel]

Well, it all happened even further in the past.

[Eric Erson]

Is this a double flashback?

[Peter McNerney]

Yes.

[Rachel]

Here I am, the manager outside my brand new restaurant. Even further in the past. I feel so young. Anyway, before I can open, I need a couple of chefs. But where am I gonna find them?

[Eric Erson]

And then I said, if I was any more tired, I'd be a semi drunk.

[Lee Overtree]

Oh, man.

[Peter McNerney]

I'm telling you, you gotta try. Stand up.

[Rachel]

You two random people.

[Eric Erson]

Us?

[Rachel]

You're perfect for the job. Report to my kitchen to be chefs in five seconds. See you inside.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Hmm.

[Eric Erson]

When do you think this guy will realize we're not actually chefs?

[Peter McNerney]

Probably at some point in the future.

[Eric Erson]

Whoa. Are we flashing forward?

[Smitty]

Shh.

[Lee Overtree]

Yes. Whoa. So, manager, you're telling us that in the past, you just hired two random people off the street to be your chefs?

[Rachel]

That is what I'm telling you.

[Eric Erson]

And those are the chefs that made this horrible pizza?

[Rachel]

Yes.

[Lee Overtree]

Did they even go to culinary school?

[Rachel]

Hmm. I'm not actually sure. Hey, chefs, get out here.

[Peter McNerney]

Here we are, boss.

[Eric Erson]

What's up, Manager?

[Rachel]

Did you two go to culinary school?

[Lee Overtree]

We did not.

[Smitty]

I am actually a financial advisor, and.

[Peter McNerney]

I dabble in tile mosaics.

[Rachel]

But why did you stay at my restaurant so long?

[Eric Erson]

I am a people pleaser.

[Peter McNerney]

You offer dental and vision.

[Rachel]

You know you two are fired. No. Scram.

[Eric Erson]

Thanks for the opportunity.

[Peter McNerney]

Frankly, this is a relief. Have a good life.

[Rachel]

Bye. Problem solved.

[Lee Overtree]

But now you have no chef.

[Rachel]

Oh, mamma mia. Now I must hire a better chef.

[Lee Overtree]

Did someone say a better chef?

[Smitty]

Huh?

[Rachel]

A mysterious man standing in my Doorway.

[Lee Overtree]

Hello, my guy. I'm Bob, a chef. Other people, they give me great ratings, but other people can't afford me.

[Rachel]

Can you make a good pizza?

[Lee Overtree]

A good pizza, huh? Give me a 2 1/2 minute montage and I'll show you the perfect pizza. So perfect they'll talk about it in the future. Whoa.

[Rachel]

Are we flashing forward?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Shh.

[Rachel]

Yes.

[Eric Erson]

So that's how you ended up with such good pizza. You hired Bob and it was all smooth sailing after that.

[Rachel]

Not quite. You interrupted the flashback before it was finished.

[Eric Erson]

Oh, sorry.

[Rachel]

Back to the flashback. All right, Bob, now, when you say montage, what do you mean?

[Lee Overtree]

It's more of a mnemonic device. We're taught in the most prestigious of culinary institutions. It's passed down from chef to chef. This tune, it echoes in the hallowed halls of haute cuisine. Les wooz sur la bus.

[Rachel]

I'm not following.

[Lee Overtree]

En anglaise. The wheels on the bus.

You put the dough on the baking sheet. Baking sheet, baking sheet. You put the dough on the baking sheet to make your pizza. Right now onto verse 2 of 30.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Eric Erson]

The wheels on the bus was Bob for real.

[Rachel]

I was worried I picked the wrong chef again. But then I saw a master at work crafting the most perfect pizza to that ponderous song. I remember it like it was yesterday.

[Lee Overtree]

And that's how you make a pizza. Oh. Verse 30 concluded.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Oh, bravo.

[Rachel]

I mean, wow. Did you choreograph that yourself?

[Lee Overtree]

Nope. Improvised all of it.

[Rachel]

You're hired for sure.

[Lee Overtree]

But do you like the pizza?

[Rachel]

Between you and me, I can't tell a good pizza from a hole in the ground. But I have a feeling people in the future will say, this was a good change.

[Eric Erson]

That was a good change.

[Rachel]

I know.

[Eric Erson]

And does Bob still work here today?

[Lee Overtree]

I made the pizza. You're eating my guy, Bob.

[Eric Erson]

And did Keon and Haley ever come back to your restaurant after the horrible pizza we did?

[Lee Overtree]

We're regulars now.

[Smitty]

Thanks, Bob.

[Lee Overtree]

No problem.

[Rachel]

Wow. My dream has really come true. And I hope we'll be here for at least a few hundred more years.

[Eric Erson]

Woah. Are we flashing forward a few hundred years?

[Rachel]

Yes.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Hello?

[Rachel]

Oh, Bob, are you there? It's so rusty and dirty in this empty restaurant. A few hundred years in the future. I'm here, old manager.

[Lee Overtree]

Don't trip on my very, very long white beard.

[Rachel]

Don't trip on my very, very long white beard.

[Lee Overtree]

You know what? Why? We were very good at our jobs, and now look at us.

[Rachel]

Where did it all go wrong?

[Lee Overtree]

You don't remember it all Happened on that one day somewhere between the past and the future.

[Rachel]

Please, no. I'm too old for more flashbacks.

[Lee Overtree]

Too late.

[Rachel]

It's happening.

[Eric Erson]

That was a weird flash forward.

[Rachel]

It was. Sorry about all the flashbacks. I never asked your name.

[Eric Erson]

My name? It's pizza critic. And I do declare that this is the best part pizza I ever.

[Rachel]

Is something wrong?

[Eric Erson]

There seems to be something in this bite of pizza. What is this? An incredibly long beard hair bob.

[Rachel]

Did you bring that beard hair back with you from the flash forward?

[Lee Overtree]

Whoops. Sorry, my guy.

[Eric Erson]

This restaurant is shut down. No.

The end.

[Smitty]

And now Lee speaks with the author.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Hi. Hi. Oh, my gosh. This is the Lee Overtree. I'm like, oh, my gosh.

[Lee Overtree]

How are you guys doing?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Good. Good.

[Lee Overtree]

Which one of you is Kian?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Me. And I'm Haley.

[Lee Overtree]

So you two wrote the Horrible Pizza?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

Can you tell me how you came up with the idea for that?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

We went to New York and we had the best pizza and we wondered how we got it. So we made this, like, funny version of the opposite.

[Lee Overtree]

Wait, I have to ask. Where was the place in New York that you got such good pizza?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

So it was like, right when we got to New York. It was like one o' clock in the morning. I was, like, so tired. So we. We had to get somewhere open. And, like, no places were open except this place called Little Italy Pizza. So we decided to order from there because, yeah, it was really close to our hotel. And actually it was very good. And our mom said, oh, there's going to be way better pizza on this trip. Don't get so, like, onto it. But that was actually the best pizza of the trip.

[Lee Overtree]

That's amazing. The best pizza you had in New York was at 1am from just like, a random place.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

The thing I just love about your story is that you have all of these different narrative devices. You have a flashback in the story, you have a montage in the story, and you even have a flash forward in the story. Can you talk about why you included all of those techniques in your story?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

What I thought, like, why we added that? Like, maybe, like, there's more interesting parts at the end of that, like flash forward or flashback, like, that the reader needs to know before, like, oh, like, what's happening? What is happening right now? Like, how did this come to be?

[Lee Overtree]

I think I know what you mean. Like, you need to learn more about what happened in the past in order to appreciate what's going on in the present. And at the same time, if you don't know how the story ends maybe even hundreds of years from now. Like, then it's not as meaningful either.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

I have to ask. In your story, the pizza making montage is to the tune of the wheels on the bus.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Yes. Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

Is that something? When you were writing the story, did you sing that out loud to each other?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Yes. Like, when we got back, that was like, oh, how do we send this in? And then. And then I was like, oh, so if you sing it like a. Oh, how about like, the wheels on the bus song, but like, a different way?

[Rachel]

And then.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

And then he just started with singing improv.

[Lee Overtree]

Could you sing some of it for me right now just so I can get a flavor for it?

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Okay. So this is how you make a pizza. Delicious, delicious, delicious. This is how you make a pizza that's delicious. To make it nice and ripe. First we're gonna go on the pizza.

Pizza place. Pizza place.

To make it nice and ripe. Now put the toppings on your pizza. Pizza, Pizza. Now put your toppings on the pizza. Only if your customer asks. Now put it in the oven.

[Lee Overtree]

That was incredible.

[Peter McNerney]

Wow.

[Lee Overtree]

That was amazing. And, you know, I'm sure the rest of your family really appreciates it when you sing that over and over and over and over.

[Eric Erson]

Yeah.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

They think it's irritating.

[Lee Overtree]

Oh, really? I wouldn't have guessed. All right, thanks, Haley. Thanks, Kian.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Thank you.

[Lee Overtree]

Bye.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Bye. Bye.

[Rachel]

Those are bad.

[Smitty]

Story.

C C. While we all agreed that the story was indeed great, story time is over. It's game time.

To tell us about the first competition. Here is Lee.

[Lee Overtree]

Thank you, Smitty. Rachel and I have created a game called kefir hold up.

[Eric Erson]

The rules are simple. Pick up and hold as many bottles of kefir as you possibly can without dropping any, while the other person tries to distract you.

[Lee Overtree]

And we're not allowed to smile because we know how you feel about funny business. Smitty.

[Smitty]

Very good. I see you each have a giant pallet of kefir bottles standing by.

[Lee Overtree]

Yes. They each have 144 bottles on them. That's a gross of Kiefer. Gross of Kiefer. Yes.

[Smitty]

All right, Lee, you're up first. Ready, set, lift.

[Eric Erson]

Hey, Lee.

[Lee Overtree]

Nice try, Rachel, but there's nothing you can do to distract me.

[Eric Erson]

Kefir's bad.

[Smitty]

What?

And Lee has smashed every single one of his kefir bottles.

[Lee Overtree]

My kefir. My sweet kefir.

[Smitty]

Rachel, it's your turn.

[Eric Erson]

Let's do this.

[Smitty]

Ready, Set.

[Lee Overtree]

Ha. Rachel, there's no way that. What? She just lifted the entire pallet over her Head with one hand.

[Smitty]

Rachel wins.

[Eric Erson]

How? Oh, did I not mention that I competed for the U.S. olympic weightlifting team in 2001? No. Weren't those Olympics in 2000? That was a major factor in why I didn't meddle.

[Smitty]

I'm to contest numero Dos nimini.

[Eric Erson]

Smitty, Peter and I have agreed to do a game called Food Math.

[Rachel]

Food Math? Peter, you agreed to a math competition against Nemeny?

[Peter McNerney]

I stopped listening after I heard the word food. What are we doing?

[Eric Erson]

Smitty will challenge us to a super complicated math problem based on all the food in the pantry. Whoever buzzes in the correct answer first wins.

[Peter McNerney]

Ah, again all I heard was food.

[Smitty]

Okay, I'll open the pantry here, let me see.

[Peter McNerney]

Got it.

[Smitty]

Here's the question. We have 64 limes and 80 eggs. If you made as many 9 inch diameter key lime pies as possible, each with 5 eggs and 4 limes, what would their cumulative circumferences divided by their total diameter be?

[Eric Erson]

Oh, that's easy.

[Lee Overtree]

First I'll calculate.

[Eric Erson]

Peter. Oh, he's eating all of the raw ingredients.

This isn't an eating competition, it's a math competition.

[Smitty]

Peter, you buzzed in first. What is the answer?

[Rachel]

PI.

[Eric Erson]

No, Peter, the question was.

[Smitty]

That is correct. What circumference divided by diameter does equal the number PI?

[Eric Erson]

I d. Oh wow. Peter, how did you know that?

[Peter McNerney]

I know everything about PI Nimone. Everything.

Sorry, did the competition start? I don't know what's happening?

[Eric Erson]

All right, next competition.

[Smitty]

That's half time.

[Eric Erson]

But can't we just do one more before.

[Smitty]

That's two minutes for delay of games.

[Eric Erson]

Well, I can say I wasn't warned. How fun.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

We'll be right back after a few words for the grown ups.

[Lee Overtree]

Hey grownups. Lee here. You can now experience the beloved Harry Potter stories like you've never heard them before. On audible with Harry Potter the full cast audience. Now you know that I love audio only storytelling. I think it's one of the best things you can expose your kids to because there's no screen. Audio storytelling has this special way of activating kids imaginations which I think is super powerful. And the Harry Potter full cast audio editions have the highest possible quality. You can ask for hundreds of unique voices and immersive sound design that brings the wizarding world vividly to life in Dolby Atmos as well as an electrifying new musical score. The adventure surrounds you. You'll hear footsteps echoing off the walls of Hogwarts and the whoosh of a golden snitch as it darts past your ear. And I love the casting. I just noticed that Matthew McFaddyen is playing Voldemort. Sorry I said his name. I know, but Matthew is one of my favorite actors. He's just incredible in everything he does. I just watched this amazing show with him. He's fantastic. And there's so many other actors that I just personally love doing this. These full cast audio editions are a spellbinding experience for longtime Harry Potter fans and a delightful new way to introduce the stories to a new generation. The first story in the series is available now. With new audiobooks in the series releasing every month. It's Harry Potter like you've never heard it before. Go to audible.com HP1 and start listening today.

[Smitty]

Welcome back. Here is the final competition of the day. Megan versus Eric. Megan, thank you.

[Eric Erson]

Smitword.

[Smitty]

Again, that is not my name.

[Eric Erson]

Now that Eric and I are both out of that penalty box, which was.

[Rachel]

Way too small, by the way. Smitty.

[Smitty]

Careful, Eric. I won't hesitate to send you right back.

[Rachel]

Fine.

[Eric Erson]

We are ready to compete. Our game is called Dramatic Reading. The rules are as we will each provide the other with the text to perform. Whoever performs their text more dramatically wins. Eric, you think you can be more dramatic than Megan?

[Rachel]

Oh, Rachel, I've explored depths far deeper than the ocean.

[Eric Erson]

Well, I just got chills. That's what Orson Welles said to me on the set of Touch of Evil when I accidentally locked us in his walk in freezer.

[Smitty]

Enough of that. All right, Present your texts. Here you are.

[Rachel]

Megan. Your text is Hamlet by William Shakespeare.

[Eric Erson]

You think performing one of the greatest dramatic works in history will be difficult for me, a classically trained actress?

[Rachel]

Only if you overact it.

[Eric Erson]

Overact who?

[Peter McNerney]

Me.

[Smitty]

Megan, here is the script.

[Eric Erson]

I need it, not Smitty. For I hold the Bard's every word right here in my heart.

[Smitty]

Okay, then. Ready, set. Recite.

[Eric Erson]

I'll tell you what I want what I really, really want so tell me what you want what you really, really want I'll tell you what I want what I really, really want I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really, really, really wanna Zig A sick.

[Rachel]

Ah.

[Smitty]

Insane.

[Eric Erson]

Bravo.

That was Hamlet, Act 3, Scene 1.

[Smitty]

Okay, now it's Eric's turn.

[Eric Erson]

Here is your text. Eric, what is this? It's my personal to do list. Good luck.

[Rachel]

All right, Eric.

[Smitty]

Ready, set. Recite.

[Rachel]

Megan's diary. November 20, 2019.

[Eric Erson]

2019. You know what? My mistake. I gave you the wrong page.

[Smitty]

I'm sorry, Megan, but the clock has already begun.

[Eric Erson]

Oh boy.

[Rachel]

Day 1462 and still no progress on project. Get this wig off my head that I accidentally glued on with an industrial strength adhesive.

[Eric Erson]

Oh, that's quite enough, I think.

[Smitty]

Megan, step back.

[Rachel]

I'm warning you ref, she's infringing on my time.

[Smitty]

I'm taking care of it.

[Rachel]

Doesn't seem like.

[Smitty]

Are you telling me how to officiate this game?

[Rachel]

Maybe I am. Maybe you don't know what you're doing.

[Smitty]

That's it.

[Lee Overtree]

You're outta here. What kind of call was that? Get your head in the game, ref.

[Smitty]

Oh, now you're telling me what to do.

[Eric Erson]

You outta here. This is gonna say this.

[Peter McNerney]

I'm yelling at you too, Smitty. I'm yelling too.

[Smitty]

You're outta here. And you're outta here. And you, and you and you. You're all outta here.

[Lee Overtree]

Fine. We're leaving and we're outraged. You are harsh, Smitty, but doggone it if you ain't fair.

[Rachel]

We might not like it, but we respect it.

[Eric Erson]

We're all leaving now because you've ejected us and we follow the rules. So goodbye Smitty and don't expect expect to see us for the rest of the day.

[Peter McNerney]

And I'm leaving this colorful box right here.

[Smitty]

Go on. G alla.

[Eric Erson]

Ya. I said ya to. Yeah.

[Smitty]

Ah, bunch of animals. Hey, you forgot your colorful box.

[Eric Erson]

It's.

[Smitty]

Hey wait. A cake. And it says Happy Referee day to Smitty. Enjoy your alone time.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Cake.

[Smitty]

Winky face Story Pirates.

I guess you do get me after all.

Mmm. Pistachio. Only one thing left to do. Sit back, relax and enjoy one more story from a kid. Here's the author to introduce it.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Hi, my Name's Ira. I'm 8 years old and I live in in Missouri. This is my story. Demons.

[Eric Erson]

Mom, where's my suitcase? In the hall closet, Lilith.

[Lee Overtree]

Mom, where's my tablet charger?

[Smitty]

In the den.

[Eric Erson]

Busy hun.

[Lee Overtree]

Have you seen my vacation chapstick?

[Eric Erson]

In the left pocket of your windbreaker in the hall closet.

[Lee Overtree]

There it is.

[Eric Erson]

Amy, you're the only one who hasn't asked me for anything yet. I don't know what I'm missing since I've never been on vacation before.

[Lee Overtree]

That's not true. We went to the beach last year.

[Eric Erson]

I was at chemistry camp in the mountains. The year before that I was sick and I had to stay with grandma.

[Lee Overtree]

But surely you were with us on the river the year before that.

[Eric Erson]

Physics camp. But I think I have everything I need. For our trip to the Grand Canyon, I checked off everything on the list mom made. But why do I need eight pairs of underwear if we're only going to be gone for three days? That's vacation math. Honey, just so you know, everyone in this family acts a little different on vacation. What do you mean? Oh, you'll see.

Lilith, stop. You're scaring your little sister. I'm not scared.

[Lee Overtree]

Okay everybody, let's get to bed so we can wake up bright and early and hit the road for the Grand Canyon.

[Smitty]

Good night.

[Eric Erson]

Better get some rest while you can. Mom, how many pairs of socks do I need to bring for this three day trip? 11.

We've been in the car forever.

[Lee Overtree]

I know I'm never this guy, but are we there yet?

[Peter McNerney]

No.

[Eric Erson]

Bz, why don't you entertain yourself like your sisters are doing?

[Lee Overtree]

My tablet battery died.

[Eric Erson]

See if Lilith will share one of her headphones so you can sing along to insufferable emotional teen music with her. Blue rabbit lodge. I'm gonna leap for hours at the hard pass.

[Lee Overtree]

Are we there yet? No.

[Eric Erson]

Why don't you do chemistry flashcards with Amy? I'm pulling elements at random and writing them down in my potion notebook so I can try them out in the lab back at school. Well, potion is kind of a joke. They're actually compounds.

[Lee Overtree]

Not interested. Are we there yet? No, we're not there yet.

[Smitty]

And you asking me that is not going to get us there any faster.

[Lee Overtree]

Okay, fine, whatever.

[Eric Erson]

Lilith, what just happened to dad? He was driving and then all of a sudden he got really scary sounding and he got bigger and he grew fang and flames shot out of his ears. Look at him. It's like he turned into a demon. That's what I was trying to tell you earlier. On vacation, everyone in the family kind of turns into a demon. What? Why? I never really thought about it. Maybe because of the stress or something. Will it happen to me? I don't know. But if I can give you one piece of advice, it would be. Oh, horses. Look at the horses. Lilith, focus. Sorry. Seeing horses is like the best part of any road trip. Who knows why? Okay, my advice is just roll with it. It usually only lasts for a few days.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Okay.

[Eric Erson]

Wow. Now there's cows dead.

[Lee Overtree]

Oh, I want to get a picture of the cow.

[Eric Erson]

Stop distracting your father. Wait, is everything okay back there? Amy, you look like you've seen a ghost. Not a ghost, a demon. And I'm gonna figure out how to fix it with chemistry. Take one down, pass it around 22 bottles of fever on the wall Curse.

[Rachel]

You all in this irritating song Adding.

[Eric Erson]

An Alkaline to the compound might have the intended effect.

[Rachel]

Here we are.

[Lee Overtree]

The Grand Canyon.

[Eric Erson]

Ooh, I want to take a picture. Let's go. Alright, everyone, this needs to turn out well so I can use it for our holiday cards. Okay, everyone say cheers. Cheese.

[Lee Overtree]

Cheese.

[Eric Erson]

Hmm. Okay, Beezy, your eyes are closed. Let's take it again. Cheese. Ugh, that one was blurry. Let's do a silly one. No, you don't do a silly one until you get the nice one. That's the rule. Everybody knows that.

Mom's a demon now too.

[Lee Overtree]

More like D Mom. Am I right?

[Rachel]

Now everybody look like you love each other and say cheese.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Cheers. Cheers.

[Rachel]

Got it. Finally, I ask you all to do one nice thing for me and it's like pulling teeth. Stay here. Your mother and I are going to get the parking passes.

[Smitty]

I should have bought a hybrid.

[Eric Erson]

Uh, Beezy, Aren't family vacations supposed to be about fun and togetherness and making memories and sometimes turning into an evil tormentor?

[Lee Overtree]

Because you're not sleeping in your own bed. You're walking like 10 miles a day and hotels smell weird.

[Rachel]

We got the parking passes.

[Smitty]

Let's go to the first overlook.

[Rachel]

Bz, did you go potty?

[Lee Overtree]

I'm good, Mom.

[Rachel]

Are you sure?

[Lee Overtree]

I'm not a toddler.

[Rachel]

I don't want to have to double back because you didn't go potty.

[Lee Overtree]

You don't have to keep saying potty. I don't have to go potty, okay?

[Rachel]

Just leave me alone.

[Eric Erson]

Dad, is this only sunscreen you brought?

[Rachel]

Yeah, why?

[Eric Erson]

It's not reef safe. And I took a pledge in after school environmental club that I'd only use reef safe sunscreen.

Busy Lilith. You both turned into demons.

[Rachel]

Happens every vacation, just like I said it would. Sorry, Amy. Maybe we should have warned you. We didn't want to scare you before your first vacation.

[Eric Erson]

Why does this happen to our family?

[Rachel]

To be fair, it's not just our family. Look at those guys over there.

[Peter McNerney]

No.

[Rachel]

I said no texting at the Grand Canyon. It happens to a lot of families on vacation.

[Eric Erson]

But you're looking and acting like horrible, scary demons.

[Rachel]

Don't you think you're being a tad bit dramatic?

[Lee Overtree]

Uh, could you move? You're in the way of my livestream.

[Rachel]

I curse you.

[Lee Overtree]

Get away.

[Rachel]

Like and subscribe.

[Eric Erson]

See?

[Rachel]

Maybe it's worse than we realized.

[Eric Erson]

I've been working on this potion in the car, and if my calculations are correct, it could turn you back into humans. Who wants to try it?

[Rachel]

Volunteer. I would love to be the one.

[Eric Erson]

You can't all take it.

[Rachel]

Why can't we all just each try a little? I mean, we're a family and vacation is about doing things together. Yeah. We believe in you and your potion, Amy.

[Eric Erson]

Wow. I've never been more proud to be part of this family. Here goes nothing.

How do you feel?

[Rachel]

Fine.

[Lee Overtree]

I mean, I don't feel less like a demon.

[Eric Erson]

Dad, you shrank back to regular size. Mom's boils are gone, Beezy's hooves are feet again, and Lilith's hair is no longer flames. I think my potion will worked. Yay.

Sort of. Beezy, you still have a tail.

[Lee Overtree]

Oh snap. I do.

[Eric Erson]

We just need more potion. But I used all the compounds in my chemistry kit.

[Rachel]

Oh no.

[Eric Erson]

It's a good thing I used Mom's vacation math and brought three more kits. Yay.

I'll make some more.

Okay, it's ready. Here you go.

How do you feel?

[Peter McNerney]

I'm sorry, Amy, but I don't think it's working.

[Eric Erson]

Wait, it's working. We're not dealing with anymore. And just in time. We have to hurry if we're gonna make that geological talk. Mom promised me she'd sign us up for. Oh, Amy. Yeah, about that. Nobody else was really into that idea, so we're gonna go on a helicopter tour instead.

[Rachel]

No.

[Eric Erson]

You promised I could learn more about the intermittent sediments from the Grand Canyon.

[Smitty]

Super grapes raw.

[Eric Erson]

Oh dear. I think we're going to need more potion.

[Rachel]

The end.

[Lee Overtree]

And when we come back, it's time for Story Love where Peter and I read even more stories written by kids.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

We'll be right back after a few words for the grown up.

[Lee Overtree]

Welcome back to StoryLove where we read stories written by kids that are sent into the story Pirates. And we talk about them and we love them.

[Peter McNerney]

True.

[Lee Overtree]

And we're inspired by them. And we ask questions if we have any. And sometimes we segue into completely unrelated conversations.

[Peter McNerney]

Lee, everything you just said is true.

[Lee Overtree]

Okay, let's read our first story From Sophie, a 10 year old in Massachusetts. Here is. I want to marry a dog. And there is a quick note before the story starts that says, while I don't truly want to marry a dog, the poem is inspired by my deep affection for my dog Jasmine, a 16 month old Pomeranian who is nothing short of of a cuddle. I'm going to marry a dog. I'm going to marry a dog. If she's pink or blue or yellow, I'm going to marry her. I'll fly her up to France and climb the Eiffel Tower and eat a bunch of Cheesecake. I'm going to marry a dog. But wait, there's a problem. But wait, there's a problem. But wait, there's a problem. Aliens are attacking the Earth. How will I marry a dog? I can shoot lasers at them, but the aliens have shields. What will I do? How will I marry a dog? I can ask them to stop. I can tell them to invade Mars instead. Bye bye, humans. We are going to invade Mars, said the aliens. I'm going to marry a dog.

[Peter McNerney]

The end.

This is so good, Lee. I love in this story, it starts clearly. It's set up as an ode to a dog, a love letter. Roses are red, violets are blue, which you don't expect action to happen in a poem like that.

[Lee Overtree]

Yeah, we always talk about in story pirates when we're helping kids with their creative writing. We talk about creating obstacles to your goal because you don't want to just be able to marry a dog right away. Yeah, that makes the story less interesting. But if there is a huge obstacle in the way of you marrying the dog, then. Now we're talking to a story here.

[Peter McNerney]

Yeah, this is a story. You know, it sort of tricks me. Like if you hear a Shakespearean sonnet, like Shakespeare will be like, let me compare you to a flower. And he's describing a feeling or a person or a thing. He's not telling a story.

[Eric Erson]

Right.

[Peter McNerney]

So because this is in the form of one of those poems, suddenly aliens being there jars us and we go, wait, wait, this is happening now, right?

[Lee Overtree]

Well, I like it as a very high stakes problem because it's like I want these, like simple things in my life that are going to bring me joy and. And then the world might end. Yeah, right.

[Peter McNerney]

Yeah. So I'm gonna commit to the thing that I feel passionately about.

[Lee Overtree]

Right. It's like rain on your wedding day.

[Peter McNerney]

It's like.

A spoon. It's like a spoon.

[Lee Overtree]

It's a lot like a spoon. Sophie, amazing poem story. I hope one day we get to meet your Pomeranian. Peter, would you read us the next story?

[Peter McNerney]

Yes, please. This story comes to us from a 6 year old from Minnesota named Cedar.

[Lee Overtree]

Great name.

[Peter McNerney]

This story is called the Blinker Butt Horse. Once upon a time, there was a horse that had blinkers on its butt. Because he was the only horse around with blinkers on his butt. He felt a little sad because he was so different. Other horses and animals would ask him, why do you have blinkers on your butt? But he just didn't know and he felt a little embarrassed. One day he was galloping down the highway, and he noticed someone's car had broken down. He asked how he could help. The person said, I don't know. Can you fix my car? The horse did not know how to fix a car and sadly said, I'm sorry, but I don't know if I can help you. Just then he had an idea. Oh, I cannot fix your car, but I can give you a ride. The person thought for a second, but wait, can you go on the road? The horse made a big grin and he said, check it out. I have blinkers on my butt. They both started laughing and the person hopped on the horse with the blinker butt, started galloping down the highway, and the man made it to work on time. From then on, the horse loved his left and his.

[Lee Overtree]

Blinker butt.

[Peter McNerney]

The end.

[Lee Overtree]

The horse loved his left and his blinker butt.

[Peter McNerney]

Maybe his left and right blinkers on his butt.

[Lee Overtree]

Honestly. Yeah. Yeah. But I also love the left. The blinker butt. Is this just going left and right or is it also brake lights?

[Peter McNerney]

I was only thinking left and right. But yeah, I think it's gotta be brake lights too.

[Lee Overtree]

I mean. Cause sometimes you can have a blinker that also does your brake light, right?

[Peter McNerney]

No, because the brake lights are red. Right. And blinkers have to be a different color.

[Lee Overtree]

They're yellow.

[Peter McNerney]

So they're on top of the brake light.

[Lee Overtree]

Well, I guess we can just assume it's blinkers though.

[Peter McNerney]

Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

I mean, maybe this horse should consider getting some brake lights.

[Peter McNerney]

You know what I think this is? I think cedar saw there are horses.

[Lee Overtree]

With blinker butts if like the Amish country. Mennonites.

[Peter McNerney]

That's right. If you want to take it on a larger road, you legally have to have certain things. Normally it's just that orange square.

[Lee Overtree]

Right.

[Peter McNerney]

But maybe a core.

[Lee Overtree]

A carriage too, right?

[Peter McNerney]

Yes.

[Lee Overtree]

Like the blinkers are going on the carriage, but it's horse powered.

[Peter McNerney]

But maybe there's. When you don't take the carriage and you're just taking the horse on the highway, you got to throw the blinkers on there. Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

Or find a horse with a blinker butt.

[Peter McNerney]

Yeah.

[Lee Overtree]

Amazing.

[Peter McNerney]

It's incredible concept, Cedar.

[Lee Overtree]

We love it. Great work, my friend. All right, let's get on to our next story from a five year old in Texas named Marina. Here's ice cream gas.

Good morning, Lily. Good morning, Tom. It's time to drive our car to the famous show. I hope we'll be on time for it. And I hope that our car doesn't run out of gas. Here we go.

[Eric Erson]

Vroom.

[Lee Overtree]

It didn't actually go. It ran out of gas again. Oh, no. Mine is ran out of gas too. I think we have an idea. Mine has enough gas to go to the gas station. Mine too. Let's go.

[Eric Erson]

Vroom.

[Lee Overtree]

We're here at the gas station. Let's fill up our car. Glug, glug, glug, glug, glug. Our cars are full of glat. Our cars are full of gas. Let's get back in. Okay, we turned our car on and our car is ready to go. Wait, it didn't actually really go after we got a gas refill. Oh, no. Our cars are starting to freeze up. What's happening to our cars? Let's check the gas. I guess this door didn't freeze. I know, because it's the hottest door in the car.

Me too. This one is too.

We got out of the car. Let's check our gas. Let's see. Oh, no. What happened to this gas? It has turned to ice cream.

That's why our cars were frozen. Our cars were full of ice cream because the gas was ice cream. Nah. Oh, I noticed that the sign on all the gas stations said ice cream gas.

[Peter McNerney]

No.

[Eric Erson]

Poof.

[Lee Overtree]

I guess we have to go to Southvania to get the gas refill. Okay, here we go on an airplane. Let's go.

[Rachel]

Whoosh.

[Lee Overtree]

We're here at Southvania. Oh, no. Look at this gas station sign. It says hot dog gas.

[Eric Erson]

No.

[Lee Overtree]

I guess it's the end of the story. Okay, the end.

So many great details in here.

[Peter McNerney]

What is this world? What's happening in this world? I love that, you know, they're going to get gas and it's. Oh, no, it's ice cream gas. Well, we need to go to the only other place we can think of that has gas, which is presumably a different country.

[Lee Overtree]

Well, sure.

[Peter McNerney]

You got to get on a plane.

[Lee Overtree]

Sure.

[Peter McNerney]

Can you travel with tubs of gasoline?

[Lee Overtree]

I don't know, but it makes sense.

[Peter McNerney]

Okay, can we talk about the one hot door?

I guess. I think probably the passenger side door just from body heat. Sure.

[Lee Overtree]

Well, here's what I think is that my interpretation is if you're a kid and you're spending a lot of time in a car on road trips, you know, grandma's house, your little sister's dance class, what have you, you're leaning against, like, one door all the time. And in the summer, like, the sun can make door really hot. And so you might assume, like, man, if the sun's on this side, I'm the one with the hot door all the time, while over there they don't get the hot door because the sun's not. I've been in cars where this is.

[Peter McNerney]

A fight about the air conditioning because someone's on the hot side and the other person's comfortable.

[Lee Overtree]

You gotta go to Southvania and get new doors for your cars.

Marina, incredible story. Thank you so, so much for sending it in. All right, that's it for StoryLove. If you want to read these stories, just head to storypirates.com and guess what, Grown Ups. You can find an even longer version of today's story love on YouTube. And grown up. StoryLove isn't just the name of a segment on our show. It's also the name of our incredible corporate volunteer program. So to find out more about StoryLove or our digital creative writing program, StoryQuest, or our nonprofit Story Pirates Changemakers, just check out the show notes for links.

That's it for today's episode. Thank you so much to today's authors Ira Kian and Haley, and a huge thanks to all of you for listening. And guess what? You can still send us your stories and we respond to every single one we receive. Grown Ups, your link to submit stories is in the show notes for Today's episode. We'll be back next week with another brand new one. Until then, stay creative and stay kind.

[Kid Authors (Hayley, Kian, Ira, Marina, Cedar)]

Bye.

[Lee Overtree]

The Story Pirates podcast is a production of Story Pirates Studios, executive produced by Lee Overtree and Benjamin Salka. This episode was produced by Sam Baer, Peter McNerney, Andrew Miller and Lee Overtree. Recording sound design and mixing by Sam Baer at the Relic Room in New York City. Additional production by Brett Toobin. Theme song by Bobby Lord. Musical scoring by Eric Erson and Jack Mitchell. Our head writer is Peter McNerney. Staff writers are Megan O' Neil and Alexis Simpson. Contributing writers are Leah Overtree and Rachel Robertson. Episode artwork by Camilla Franklin.

This episode features performances by greg barnett, matt cox, christina gross beach, gabby hornig, rachel jurofsky, anna marr, peter mcnerney, alexandra nader, joshua nassar, megan o', neill, leah overtree, austin sanders, samantha turret, matt zimbrano, rachel winitsky, and nimini ware.

First you make the dough for the pizza. For the pizza, for the pizza. First you make the dough for the pizza. Because that's like bread. The way you make dough is you put different things in it. I pretty sure flour is one of the things. I don't know what else you would put in the dough. Butter, maybe. So then you squish up the dough and you make it flat. You make it flat. You make it flat. Then you squish up the dough and you make it flat. You know what? I'm just going to the pizza shop.