Sam Taggart (2:35)

Oh, right, because you threw out your back.

George Severis (2:36)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (2:37)

Wow. The old lady. The old lady vibe is really. So you threw out your back. You're having a fight with a customer service representative about the pool being closed. Even going to the. Well, going to the pool. Either way.

George Severis (2:51)

Can I explain something really humiliating? When you this gym, you have to walk through like a little shop basically, to get from the locker room to the pool so you're in a vulnerable place. I'm. I'm in a speedo walking through a store, basically. And then the person at the desk is like, oh, the pool's closed. And then I have to, like, be like, oh, whoops. How humiliating is that?

Sam Taggart (3:18)

Well, yeah, there's nothing like. Well, also, you've already mustered up the courage to be, you know, essentially naked in public. And the pool being closed means that you're basically not just like a sexual predator. You're literally just wearing little tighty whities in public while there's children around.

George Severis (3:36)

I walk back through the locker room, everyone's like, didn't you just leave?

Todd Glass (3:38)

Yeah.

George Severis (3:39)

Like, you made a whole show of leaving and now you're back.

Sam Taggart (3:41)

Yeah. Made a whole show of leaving.

George Severis (3:42)

Yeah. So that was really tough. Then I did my little workouts, Then I went and got a coffee. But then it was like, I got a to go coffee. And then I was like, well, actually, I want to stay. But then I was like, so then I had to.

Sam Taggart (3:52)

Coffee sounds really difficult. It's really challenging.

George Severis (3:54)

And then I was getting the coffee to stay. So I've had two coffees. And then he was like, well, do you want a coffee to go? I was like, well, if you're offering, what am I gonna do? Say no to the third coffee?

Sam Taggart (4:04)

I had a coffee. This is groundbreaking stuff. I had a coffee related experience as well this morning, which is that I got an iced coffee, but then they accidentally gave me a hot one. Of course, I immediately, being such a sub, I'm like, it's okay. Maybe I secretly want it hot anyway. And they're like, no, we're giving you an ice. And then I was walking home, and I was genuinely so thrilled that I got a free coffee that I can put in the fridge and have tomorrow. And I'm like, when will I be old enough? Or like, how much money will I have to make to not be excited that much by something like that? It is humiliating how much? I was like, oh, good, maybe now I can spend that money on something else.

George Severis (4:38)

I think it never ends.

Todd Glass (4:39)

Never. Yes.

George Severis (4:39)

I think it never ends. I agree.

Sam Taggart (4:40)

Okay. And actually, let's welcome in our guest. We were hoping you would jump in despite the fact that we told you not to, of course.

George Severis (4:47)

Well, we love when a guest is comfortable with us to the point where they feel like jumping in.

Todd Glass (4:51)

Yes.

George Severis (4:52)

And we actually have to say this guest, for the first time in podcast history, brought a bottle of wine for us.

Sam Taggart (5:00)

I'm Actually even regretting, like, not opening it. I actually can't. But that's amazing.

George Severis (5:08)

I mean, I've never had anything like that in my life. I'm feeling so taken care of. So please welcome to the podcast Todd Glass.

Todd Glass (5:14)

Hello.

George Severis (5:14)

Wow.

Todd Glass (5:15)

Good to be here. We've never met, right? I know.

George Severis (5:17)

We never met.

Todd Glass (5:18)

Never met.

George Severis (5:18)

I'm actually sitting on a humiliating bomb that I have not told either of you. Please.

Todd Glass (5:24)

Are we ready? Yes.

George Severis (5:25)

Okay. We've never met but one time in 2013, I was 23. 2012. 2013, after your big Marin appearance, I.

Todd Glass (5:37)

Emailed you, and I emailed you back, and you emailed me back.

George Severis (5:40)

You remember this?

Todd Glass (5:41)

Well, I email everybody back after that, by the way. Only after I came out on Marc Maron, because I didn't. I didn't react to any emails. And after that I did because I thought I might get some emails. And after I was reading them, I mean, let me tell you something. They, they, they, they. They're pretty heavy. They're heavy. They're. They're light, they're heavy. They're everything. And I went, oh, my God, the fact that these would have sat on deaf ears or fallen on deaf ears. I'm so glad. But you know what? There's a chance. Tell me what you wrote, because I'm pretty good.

George Severis (6:11)

Like, it's so embarrassing because I was literally, like, 23. I.

Sam Taggart (6:15)

Was you even out yet?

George Severis (6:16)

No, I was, like, out to my friends. I was closeted to, like, my parents.

Sam Taggart (6:19)

Oh, my God. Were you doing comedy?

George Severis (6:21)

I was like, just starting stand up.

Todd Glass (6:23)

Wow, this is crazy. I love it. Because you don't know, like, how paths cross. So let me hear what you wrote.

George Severis (6:30)

So I emailed you, basically being like. Like, listen to you on mare, and it was so inspiring, blah, blah, blah. And being like, I'm going to, like. I was like, I'm coming out to my parents tomorrow. Wish me luck. And you responded, how did it go? And then humiliatingly, I was like, I didn't actually do it. Like, I got cold feet, basically.

Todd Glass (6:47)

But I must have. I never give generic. It's always like, you know, I really try to, you know, assert myself.

George Severis (6:53)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (6:54)

Someone feels like, oh, he read this and he really. But yes, some of them that you. So how often. How. How often did you. How long did you put it off before you.

George Severis (7:01)

Probably, like, another year and a half. But it is crazy to, like, look back. I read it this morning because I was like, how. What did I sound like that? Yeah. And it was, like, genuinely humiliating because I was going to be like, it'd be so funny to read it out loud. And I was like, no, actually I wish you were.

Sam Taggart (7:17)

What kind of. I won't make you read out loud. But what kind of humiliating. Like what. What was the tone? You sound unsure of yourself or you sounded too sure of yourself.

George Severis (7:24)

I sounded like the language was very almost bro y. Like it reminded me of how I used to talk and text specifically and in a pejorative way. And it was very like, I don't know of the time being sort of like there aren't that many gay guys in comedy. Like it's weird to be gay and open mics.

Todd Glass (7:48)

That was one of my things. That's. Which is in a good. How much things have changed in that period of time because I didn't want it to become my identity. That's what really scared the out of me. And then my manager said something great. He goes, it's not the most interesting thing about you. It won't be your identity. But I think 25 years ago that probably wasn't as true. Once you mentioned on stage if you were gay, your act pretty much had. Was usually about that. Which I understand it doesn't have to be that way anymore, but yeah, it was, it was. I didn't want it to be like, oh, am I going to just be. That's going to be who I am. Yeah. You know gay comedian Todd Glass.

George Severis (8:22)

Well, I feel like I was really similar. I reacted to it but for the first like five years, all I was doing was like really alts. Like everything has to be weird and playing with the form. And now I'm like settled.

Todd Glass (8:34)

How much fun you say that. You mean not outside of being gay, just your style of comedy?

George Severis (8:38)

Yeah, because I was like, well, I don't want to be just like the gay guy. And then I was like. Then I went through another five year period, was like, I'm just the gay guy. And that was that. Actually now I'm settled in like a nice place.

Todd Glass (8:46)

Ye.

George Severis (8:46)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (8:47)

I had an experience recently. I hope my. Well, I hope my dad is not angry that I'm saying this, but I love him to death. But he. I released a special and like I. I sort of perversely pride myself that not all of my material is about being gay, which is. Which is of course some weirdly internalized homophobia, I'm sure as well. But you know, there's no time to get into that. But like when I was mapping out the material for the special, there were like sort of four sections and only One of them was basically gay material. And I was like, great, this will appeal to many different kinds of people. There's stuff about politics, there's stuff about jobs. I've had whatever. And my dad watched a special, and he was, like, very complimentary. And then he goes, was this mostly for an audience of LGBTQ people? Because a lot of the material is about that topic. And I was like, oh, my God. After all of that, even just that fourth is enough for someone who maybe doesn't watch a lot of gay comedy to be like, oh, that's what this is.

Todd Glass (9:44)

I hope I'm not just trying to jam this in there, but it was a thought that I had yesterday that I think felt fits right into this. And with the show, it just happens. Could be about a billion things, but it happened to be about, like, heated rivalry.

Sam Taggart (9:56)

Yes.

Todd Glass (9:56)

And I know there's a lot of people that might go. Because you just know. I haven't even heard it yet. But you. You know, and then slowly you see these things. You know, there's going to be people that say, no, I'm all right with it. But it's just like every show now and then. Or they'll go, oh, no, no, I'm all right with it. Just, you know, I wouldn't like that if it was a guy and a girl. And you can factually break these things down and go, no. Girls run out on the ice all the time and kiss their boyfriends. You can break down what they're saying, and you go, if you think it's too many gay shows, you know, there's. Or that they can't get over, that it's just a love story. And I think people feel. They're so scared to say that. You don't even have to use the word homophobic because it falls on deaf ears. You got to just call a behavior. You go, you're so afraid to say you're not all right with it, but I can prove to you that's not a bad thing. Because you go, yeah, I guess I have a problem with it. Instead of coming up with these fake things. That's not the real reason. I'm not arguing with you. I'm telling you. So if you. It would. Hold on, hold on. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. If you. If you're able to. To just say that, like, you know, be honest with yourself.

Sam Taggart (11:03)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (11:04)

Because I watched and I said, here's an example of that. If you are 100 all right with it. I watch movies my whole life that were obviously A guy and a girl. I never had a problem realizing it was a love story. I go, it's a guy and a girl. I can't get over it. I can't. So it was very easy for me to get over. Just, it's a love story I saw past. And that should be the same way if you're truly. You're not a bad person. If you're not 100% okay, but it's okay to go completely. I must not be. Because you're right, I did. It does get in the way. That's okay. Yeah. At least you can deal with that and be honest with it instead of coming up with five or six fake reasons that you're having trouble with it other than the truth.

Sam Taggart (11:40)

And you don't even know you're coming up with fake reasons because you're just. You're starting with the assumption like, well, if there's one thing I'm not, it's prejudiced. But I do feel weird. So it must be something else, right?

George Severis (11:49)

Yeah. Yeah. I just like the writing.

Todd Glass (11:51)

I like that you said that because I think sometimes it is unknowingly, completely. But you know, if somebody says, well, you know, you have to at one point go, yeah, you're not a. Maybe it needs to be put out there more. You're not a horrific person. If you go, well, I guess I'm not all right with it. I guess I'm not alright with it.

Sam Taggart (12:05)

No, completely.

George Severis (12:06)

I think, I assume almost more cynicism sometimes where like when people are watching heated rivalry, I'm like, thank you for the support. Like, I'm like, wow, look at you. You're watching it as if it's not like just enjoyable for a while.

Sam Taggart (12:17)

I completely agree with all the heated rivalry. Love. I'm like, are you guys trying to prove something?

George Severis (12:23)

Yeah. I'm like, are you being like, patronizing?

Sam Taggart (12:25)

I don't even like it that much. What is the. What are you trying to prove here?

George Severis (12:30)

But I do think it's sincere.

Sam Taggart (12:31)

But it is sincere.

George Severis (12:31)

Yeah, but we are both more cynical and we're like, what's.

Todd Glass (12:35)

Yeah, yeah, maybe it's that. I've only seen clips, by the way, but enough where I could talk about it.

Sam Taggart (12:39)

Yeah, you.

Todd Glass (12:39)

You got it. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe it's that in a good way that people are just seeing that it is. If you, if you're, you know, oh, it's just a really. They can appreciate the love story. Maybe they thought they couldn't. I don't know. But anyway. But I thought that with Your dad definitely. If you saw another comedian with the same number, you know, 30% of the act being about it, he's probably seen hundreds of. Totally. So, you know, you want to go, dad, you're not. It's okay.

George Severis (13:07)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (13:07)

You have to almost work backwards. I felt with that. You have to go, listen, you're not a bad. Because sometimes people feel. It's like, my Patton Oswald had a joke and I loved it. I'll probably bastardize it. But he goes. If somebody goes, you know, why Two guys kissing, you know, I don't like it, too, because it grosses me out. Yeah. He would go, thank you. You brought the truth to the table. As maybe some people go. Horrifying, that is. Now, we can have a conversation, but when you make up reasons, the religion or this or that, or we can't have a conversation because you're not bringing the truth to the table. So I think, like, that's what people do. They unknowingly make up reasons, which is.

Sam Taggart (13:44)

Of course, like, sort of opens up another can of worms about. Sometimes the truth is way uglier. I mean, it's like, to say that grosses me out is more hurtful than being like, well, I was raised.

Todd Glass (13:54)

Why?

Sam Taggart (13:55)

You know, I believe Jesus teachings, whatever. And then you're. You have to. You're forced to have a more difficult conversation. But then by having that difficult conversation, you're not putting it off. Five generations. Like, you're actually, like, dealing with it in the moment.

George Severis (14:08)

Yeah. Anyhow, anyway, well, thanks for responding to my email.

Todd Glass (14:14)

I want to hear the email.

Sam Taggart (14:15)

I know.

Todd Glass (14:17)

How about. Will you send it to me privately?

George Severis (14:19)

Yeah, I'll forward.

Todd Glass (14:20)

Okay.

George Severis (14:21)

It's like the thing. I used to do this thing and where I would say ugg all the time.

Sam Taggart (14:25)

Like, ugh.

George Severis (14:26)

Yeah. Like, it was kind of like millennial speak. Pejorative. Like, ugh.

Todd Glass (14:30)

Ugh.

George Severis (14:30)

Ugh. I don't know what I'm doing.

Sam Taggart (14:31)

Like, that type of thing, definitely.

George Severis (14:33)

And I was like, oh, it's a.

Todd Glass (14:34)

Bit uncomfortable in your skin.

Sam Taggart (14:36)

Yeah, yeah.

Todd Glass (14:37)

No, it's cute.

Sam Taggart (14:39)

Well, it's also. It undercuts anything you're saying. It's like, yeah, it's like putting.

George Severis (14:42)

LOL after.

Todd Glass (14:43)

Exactly. Exactly.

George Severis (14:44)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (14:45)

I met my. I was in a relationship with somebody that saw me on Kimmel and reached out. My book was called the Toddler Situation, because that's what I used to call me being gay. Because I didn't. I would go, they don't know about my situation. Yeah. My friend Daniel goes, is that what you call it? Yeah. And he saw me and he goes, I have my own situation. And then I emailed them back and. And then he said, if you're ever in Denver, I'd like to buy you a beer. And then, you know, about a year later, we'd email back and forth. And then I was going into Denver to then fly to a college, but the puddle jumper from Denver to the college got canceled. And I'm like, I emailed him like four in the morning because that's when my alert came in.

George Severis (15:26)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (15:26)

And that was like, you know, hey, most comedians would just get in a car and drive from Denver. I bad with directions. I hate. So I said, hey, this would be a good opportunity. And he was there at the airport, picked me up, drove me to the college. And then, and then from then on, we were, we were in a relationship for a long time. It was. And we're still very, very. We broke up, but we are still very, very close. And really I said if there was ever a love story written about our everything, it would have started after we broke up, even though it was a great relationship. But it got even like more beautiful after we broke up. And the journey we took as friends, accepting that one of us might meet somebody. And are we okay with that?

Sam Taggart (16:07)

Totally.

George Severis (16:08)

But anyway, is he still in Denver?

Todd Glass (16:10)

Yes, he is.

George Severis (16:10)

Wow, that is so interesting.

Sam Taggart (16:13)

I. The situation thing reminded me. Sorry to keep talking about my dad, which I literally never do on this podcast. But the situation thing reminded me of when I first came out to my parents. My dad went through a. He started watching a bunch of movies with gay themes to basically educate himself. And he watched the movie weekend. Have you seen that movie? It's just like a gay sort of romantic drama. It's about two guys that meet, but one of them is about to move to a different city. So they know they have a limited time together. So it's like 24 hours, but it's very sexually explicit. There's a full on cum shot in it. And so my dad goes, you know, I watched the movie weekend. I was like horrified. I was like, oh my God, I can't. And he goes, it was actually one of the better movies on the topic. But like, the topic to me reminds me so much of this situation. Like to him, it's just like the topic he's making. Made a list of movies he's gonna watch on the topic. The topic being homosexuality. And he thought this was actually one of the better movies on the topic.

Todd Glass (17:05)

It's funny because in that case, if somebody says something you know, that go, well, I wouldn't like that if it was a cum shot. If it was a straight movie and you could go, you know what? Okay, that'll buy.

Sam Taggart (17:16)

I see that.

Todd Glass (17:17)

Because you would go, yeah, you're not lying. You would have in this case.

Sam Taggart (17:19)

No, he had no problem with the cum shot. But he did. But he was like, there's too much gay stuff in your stand up comedy special.

Todd Glass (17:24)

Ye.

Sam Taggart (17:25)

I'm like, pick Elaine.

Todd Glass (17:26)

Yeah, that's so funny.

George Severis (17:27)

The topic is really right. It is one of the best.

Sam Taggart (17:30)

It is one of the better movies on the topic. Highly recommend.

Todd Glass (17:33)

Sometimes in my act, I don't talk about being gay a lot.

Sam Taggart (17:36)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (17:36)

And I wanted to make sure that I wasn't being, you know, maybe homophobic on myself. I don't want, sometimes if a crowd wasn't great, I wouldn't talk about it. But I go, you're not, are you not talking about it? Because just right now it's not interesting to you. You talked about it. You didn't wanted to make sure? Because I thought maybe it is. So what I did was one night it happened accidentally, I went there, I solved it. I just was talking about a relationship. And then I went, you know, you know, when you're in a relationship, blah, blah. And the point came when I went, yeah, he would come home and I would just move on with the joke. And I went, yeah, that made me good. So you're not embarrassed about it? You know, you're not afraid to tell audiences, like they might judge you? Yeah. So when I don't want to talk about it specifically, which I do sometimes, sometimes I think of funny things that you know. But yeah, just at least be honest about what I'm talking about.

Sam Taggart (18:22)

I don't keep too generic. I've always found it's easier to talk about being gay in a sort of club crowd, mixed crowd when you're in a relationship because people get that. But whereas when you're single, the idea of talking about dating or hooking up in the gay world, it is slightly different than the straight world. So you feel like you need to educate people a little bit. Whereas if I'm like, I can be like my mother in law, people get what that is. I don't need to explain it.

Todd Glass (18:49)

Well, I always said, you know, in hindsight it wasn't an experiment I knew I was doing, but it just sort of proved how much relationships are relationships. Because years I would just replace guy with girl.

Sam Taggart (19:01)

Right.

Todd Glass (19:02)

People go, you had to make up those stories. And I would go, oh, no, no, no, no. I didn't make up the stories. I just switched the sex.

Sam Taggart (19:07)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (19:08)

But if there was any difference whatsoever in relate. There are some. Of course. Of course there's some. No, no. But the bulk of them. A relationship is a relationship.

Sam Taggart (19:16)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (19:16)

And so no one ever sat in the audience watching my material going, I just don't. None of these relationship jokes. I didn't relate at all. I go, no. They were sitting there laughing. It's just like us. His girlfriend is just like our.

Sam Taggart (19:29)

And they get to feel better about themselves because they're relating to you on a human to human level.

Todd Glass (19:33)

Right. And yet you're talking about a guy.

Sam Taggart (19:35)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (19:35)

So that's why, you know, I'm sure you've all talked about this. When somebody goes, oh, must be great with two guys. No, it's good with your buddies because you're not in love with them. You can't get hurt as much from them. So with two guys, there's a lot of crossover. It's not, you know, it's not just you and your. Your friends, you know.

George Severis (19:52)

Well, sometimes, you know.

Sam Taggart (19:54)

Yeah, that's true.

Todd Glass (19:55)

What do you mean?

George Severis (19:56)

Well, you know, you know how gay guys can mix the social, can become.

Sam Taggart (20:00)

Sexual partners, can go back to being friends.

Todd Glass (20:03)

There's hurt feelings and there's tenderness, you know, that. That is the same, you know?

George Severis (20:08)

Yes, yes. Yeah. I feel like when I first was starting, like, it was really daunting to, like, come out on stage every time. But then, like, basically being in New York and having, like, a strong group of gay guy friends, I really got addicted to sort of like the cadence of gay guys hanging out with each other. It's such a funny, like, back and forth constantly. And I was like, wait, I never hear this.

Sam Taggart (20:32)

Yeah.

George Severis (20:32)

So then I kind of got obsessed with, like, just that.

Sam Taggart (20:34)

I think we went all the way in the other direction. Both you and I went all the way in the other direction because we developed a group of friends in New York at some point that were like, all gay guys. And then we forgot that that was not the average person's experience. And I went like. When I was starting out in Boston, it was very much like, I was very often the only gay person on a lineup, very often performing for, like, super straight, like, clubby crowds. And then in Brooklyn, it's just so easy to get used to, like, queer rooms and, like, shows that are, like, all gay.

George Severis (21:02)

Yeah. I even sometimes I still feel myself being like, old guard. Like, I'll be like, you know, it's really important. You cut your teeth in front of like a mixed crowd. Yeah, definitely. Like, you gotta go where people don't like you.

Sam Taggart (21:13)

Yeah.

George Severis (21:14)

And it's like, I don't even know if that's true, but I see I do have that in my head.

Todd Glass (21:17)

Yeah.

George Severis (21:17)

And I kind of wish I did.

Sam Taggart (21:18)

Well, it does. I know. I do too. But you get a sense of accomplishment when you see someone who like, is not the type of person that would like you in or that would relate to you in day to day life. And then you say something, you see them laugh, you're like, well, I did it. That is more difficult than making like some random gay guy laugh that like, could be my friend.

George Severis (21:37)

That's true. It's true. It's complex.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (21:49)

Friday, kick off the Winter Olympics in style with the opening ceremony from Italy featuring a special performance by Mariah Carey. Celebrate the greatest athletes from around the globe as they come together to go for gold.

Todd Glass (22:05)

Lipsy for sensational.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (22:07)

The opening ceremony of the Winter Olympics. Ilia Malady redefining this Sport. Friday at 8 Eastern, 7 Central on NBC and Peacock.

iHeartRadio Event Promoter (22:18)

This Sunday, I Heart Radio brings you live to Levi's Stadium in Santa Clara for the Super Bowl 60 tailgate concert presented by NetApp. It's the ultimate pre game party featuring an exclusive performance from Teddy Swims. Your front row experience will be on iHeartradio stations across the country and the free iHeartradio app this Sunday at 3:30 Eastern, 12:30 Pacific. Then after the concert, tune in to the Super Bowl 60 pregame show on NBC.

Todd Glass (22:49)

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Sam Taggart (23:04)

What do you have to lose?

Todd Glass (23:06)

Give it a try@mintmobile.com Switch limited time.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (23:09)

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Todd Glass (23:11)

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Todd Glass (23:24)

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iHeart Podcast Announcer (23:26)

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George Severis (24:05)

Should we do our first segment?

Sam Taggart (24:06)

Oh, sure.

George Severis (24:07)

Okay, Todd, good.

Sam Taggart (24:08)

I mean this is a. Get ready, get ready because this is stupid.

George Severis (24:12)

No, this is good. Our first segment is called straight shooters. And in this segment we're going to ask you a series of rapid fire questions. It's basically this thing or this other thing and you just have to pick one.

Todd Glass (24:22)

Okay?

George Severis (24:23)

The only rule is you can't ask any follow up questions or we will fucking scream.

Sam Taggart (24:27)

It's sort of a Rorschach test and we kind of judge you based on the answers, but there's no rules.

Todd Glass (24:31)

Okay. Okay, here we go. Let me get a drink.

Sam Taggart (24:35)

All right.

Todd Glass (24:37)

No passing.

Sam Taggart (24:38)

No passing.

George Severis (24:39)

Kick us off, George.

Sam Taggart (24:40)

Live, laugh, love or zip zap. Zop.

Todd Glass (24:43)

Zip zap Zop.

George Severis (24:46)

It's about the notes you don't play. Or these overnight oats are just. Okay.

Todd Glass (24:51)

It's about the notes you don't play. Oh, this is great. Because there's really no. I went zip zap. Oh, no, never mind. I forgot.

Sam Taggart (24:58)

Domino's pizza or checkers the dog.

Todd Glass (25:04)

Domino's pizza. I'm always hungry.

George Severis (25:06)

One battle after another or one tattle upon your brother.

Todd Glass (25:09)

Ooh, can you say it again?

George Severis (25:13)

One battle after another or one tattle upon your brother?

Todd Glass (25:17)

One battle after another.

Sam Taggart (25:19)

Jesus, take the wheel. Or gorgeous. I'll have the veal.

Todd Glass (25:21)

Gorgeous.

George Severis (25:22)

I'll have the veal pluribus. Or struggle bus.

Todd Glass (25:27)

What? A struggle bus. I don't even know what that is.

Sam Taggart (25:32)

Benching £400 or belching so freaking loud?

Todd Glass (25:36)

Oh, benching. I don't want to belch.

George Severis (25:39)

Setting reasonable expectations or getting teased and bullied on vacation.

Todd Glass (25:47)

Setting reasonable expectations. Wow. I don't want to get bullied.

George Severis (25:52)

No, right?

Sam Taggart (25:53)

No. Especially not on vacation.

Todd Glass (25:54)

That's my fun.

George Severis (25:56)

So we rate our guests on a scale of 0 to 1000 doves.

Todd Glass (25:59)

Wait a second. I don't see any machine to. It's there. Oh, I see it.

Sam Taggart (26:04)

Now we have proprietary technology.

Todd Glass (26:06)

How did I do?

Sam Taggart (26:07)

I think really well.

George Severis (26:08)

I think really well.

Sam Taggart (26:09)

The number one thing is you laughed at all of our rhymes. And the primary reason we do this segment is so people can give us sort of validation.

George Severis (26:16)

The way that this segment hurts when someone just goes a B. Oh, yeah.

Sam Taggart (26:22)

No, we want. We want you to look like you're having fun.

Todd Glass (26:25)

And I think the absurdity of some of them is like just so funny.

Sam Taggart (26:29)

Because Everyone is always. No one knows what we want from them. Everyone is confused. And it's how you react to that really says a lot about you.

Todd Glass (26:36)

I got nervous. I thought you were going to be. Did you ever hook up at a. Behind a gas station?

George Severis (26:40)

Oh, my God.

Todd Glass (26:40)

And I was like, oh, God.

George Severis (26:41)

Well, did you?

Todd Glass (26:43)

No, I never did bring it up.

George Severis (26:46)

The lady doth protest too much. I think that was an amazing performance. And I waved 999 doves.

Sam Taggart (26:52)

I completely agree.

Todd Glass (26:53)

By the way, speaking of hooking up.

Sam Taggart (26:55)

Behind a gas station, tell me if this means that I have somehow, like, internalized shame or something.

George Severis (27:01)

Great.

Sam Taggart (27:02)

One of my biggest pet peeves.

George Severis (27:04)

Let me stop you there. You do?

Sam Taggart (27:05)

I do. Yeah. One of my biggest pet peeves, slash sort of complaints is like, when people in, like, a podcast setting or in a comedy show setting when something is like, sex themed. When you go on a sex and relationships podcast and you're like, oh, I'm here to promote my work. And then they're like, so how many people have you fucked in the last six months? I'm like, I don't even feel shame about sex. But I'm like, that's actually private.

George Severis (27:30)

Yeah. I think I am quick to share, but I'm also quick to regret it.

Sam Taggart (27:33)

You don't share a lot on the podcast. That's true. Considering how generally sexually liberated you are. It's not. I think you are relatively private about it.

George Severis (27:43)

No, that's a good point. I think it's like, well, you got to have some boundaries, folks.

Sam Taggart (27:48)

That's true.

Todd Glass (27:49)

It's interesting to try to figure out. Like, do you want to talk about it? Yeah. Because I think deep down I do enjoy talking to my friend about it. But were you shy to talk about. It's hard to figure that out. Like, should I get more comfortable or are these. You know, what I heard? Maybe this isn't answering the question, but. Oh, Savage, Dan Savage. He said something once, and I know these are just his theories, but he says a lot of clean theory sometimes, you know when it says to sharing everything. You know, someone was asking him and he goes, my parents didn't know this. My brother does. He goes, listen, you don't have to share everything with everybody. You just have to share enough that you can be pretty close to your authentic self.

Sam Taggart (28:26)

Yeah, that's true.

Todd Glass (28:27)

So can you not share that? And can you not share that? But you still get to be your authentic self. And I think for a lot of people, when they heard him say that, you went, oh, okay, okay. Yeah, you don't have to share if you have a fetish or if this thing you don't. Not everybody has to know everything. But you can't hide that you're gay because then there's no way you could be.

Sponsor Voice (28:42)

Right?

Sam Taggart (28:42)

Right.

Todd Glass (28:43)

Or whatever you are.

George Severis (28:44)

You know what I really appreciate is someone kind of. I kind of appreciate an oversharer because I'm never sort of like. I kind of appreciate someone who, like, gets too drunk or something, or like.

Sam Taggart (28:52)

Someone who takes attention away from you.

George Severis (28:54)

Because then I'm like, okay, finally I can relax now. I can say something crazy. And it's never going to be as crazy as what they said. Yeah, I can.

Sam Taggart (29:01)

It's an important role in the group for someone to be the drunk one.

George Severis (29:05)

Someone has to do it because everyone, if not everyone else is like, oh, I had my one glass. I'm good, thank you. Like, I need someone to be reckless, and it can't be me.

Todd Glass (29:13)

That's why I was afraid to do the only drug. I've never. I've only done. Well, you know, liquor, if you call that a joke. A pot and mushrooms.

George Severis (29:19)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (29:20)

But one night I was somebody. I want to do X. That's the only thing I want to do is X. I want to make sure it's pure. Can we get it from, like, I, you know, everybody wants.

Sam Taggart (29:27)

Yeah, we'll connect you to some people, but.

Todd Glass (29:28)

But, but, you know, no one. Everybody cares. But, you know, some people might be more maybe. But there was one night, it was my friend and his. And. And her boyfriend, who is what I call, you know, just absurdly good looking, just, like disgustingly pretty. Handsome. Both. And I was. And he's the sweetest person. And I was afraid, this was just like, two years ago, that if I did Molly, I would start petting him or something and, like, sharing too much.

Sam Taggart (29:56)

I do fear that as well.

Todd Glass (29:57)

And I was like, oh, what's gonna happen if I do that? So I didn't do it. But I never told them no, but.

Sam Taggart (30:02)

This is like, that's such a real.

George Severis (30:05)

I mean, when I was in high school and everyone was like, drinking, I was like, well, I can't drink. And like, I did it as, like, I'm a good kid. But really I was like, what if I get drunk and like, and come out and come out. I can't do that. I can't.

Todd Glass (30:15)

I relate with that one night I thought I did really, like, what the. With my friend Mike. I was like, did I just say. And I worked into a sweat. A flop sweat. And that was the only time I never messed up on stage. Which is not a, you know, not bragging about it. It's not healthy. But I never said boyfriend. Yeah, I think if I did, I would have just gone, yeah, my boyfriend, you know, overdid it to make it look totally. It was a joke.

George Severis (30:42)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (30:43)

Well, the not wanting to pet the hot streak, I think is really real. Well, it reminds me of like the Maria Bamford, like she was diagnosed with unwanted thoughts syndrome, which is like one of the most amazing names for it because I have that and often I have it. When you're at your most comfortable is when a thought. It's like when you're like holding a baby and you're like, I'm gonna drop it. It's that kind of thing. Like when you're at your most comfortable and even like self actualized, like you were with friends that you loved and you were like, presumably at a concert or party or something. But of course you're like, I'm gonna get too comfortable and do something that will ruin everything.

George Severis (31:18)

And it's true, by the way.

Sam Taggart (31:19)

Yeah, I know. Well, it's like if you're with a friend, you're like, what if I make out with them?

George Severis (31:25)

The summer after high school, when I did start drinking, I was instantly at a party with basically frat people and a southern fratty guy I'm unfortunately addicted to. And it's not something I'm necessarily proud of, but I was like, drunk and like following this man around like a mouse following cartoon cheese. Like, I was like, I could not stop being like, yeah, I'll do that. Yeah, what do you want? I was like being so crazy. And afterwards I was like, enough, I can't do this around these people.

Todd Glass (31:53)

You know, I think this is on the same lines. I had a theory that a lot of times maybe there could be no truth to this whatsoever, but that a lot of times there's. The best man at a wedding is to the guy is a gay friend. Because when you were in the closet, you were giving 100% to this person. And even if you had a crush on him and you never did anything inappropriate, you just had a crush. You. You never. But you, you're. You're available. You want to drive there, you want to drive there, you want to do that so you become close. And if that person ends up being, you know, secure with themselves and the friendship after you find out, because I, I would like, I did this. I was so nervous that I would like, yeah, you know, get. And that's What I. And the thing was, that's what I would do to get out of, like, if someone said, that girl has a crush on you, I would just start drinking.

George Severis (32:37)

Really?

Todd Glass (32:37)

Because I would get out of it by being sloppy drunk.

Sam Taggart (32:40)

Oh.

Todd Glass (32:40)

So if anybody. You know, one time I saw a girl walking down the street in Villanova. I was, like, 22 years old. I saw. I go, oh, man. I talked about how hot she was, you know, and how hot she was. I could be like. And then my friend, one night we're at this bar, my friend goes, todd, that girl's here. And I'm like, motherfucker. Oh, Jesus Christ. So I just started. I would just get sloppy drunk.

George Severis (33:01)

Wow, that's so interesting. I do forget about that side of closetedness.

Sam Taggart (33:04)

I know.

George Severis (33:05)

Like, I fully forgot about, like, people, like, and that girl's interested in you. Oh, my God.

Sam Taggart (33:09)

It's one of the weirdest stress. I remember when I was in college, I think I came out to my parents, like, junior year of college or something. But the first couple of summers or Christmases, when I'd be back, my mom was obsessed with sitting next to me, putting her arm around me, being like, so, what's going on with the ladies? And she wouldn't let up until I just said something to appease her. I'd be like, you know, it's like, fine, blah, blah. But she needed specifics. So finally I had to be like, okay, you got me. I have a girlfriend. I just, like, had to. Yeah. And then, like, next time they would ask about it, I'd be like, oh, yeah, that's not happening anymore. Like, I. I didn't. I wasn't so sociopathic that I, like, weaved a hole. Like, her name is Jessica, and, like, she's coming over for Easter.

George Severis (33:53)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (33:54)

But I just needed her to stop. And it made me feel so bad about myself.

George Severis (33:59)

Yeah. Yeah.

Todd Glass (34:00)

O.

George Severis (34:01)

Really tough.

Todd Glass (34:01)

That's why, you know, I think this is helpful. That's why I'm putting it out there. I think that's why when I see people, I think there's a lot of people that say they're okay. Obviously, there's people that are okay with whatever called gay marriage. Gay people, I think a lot just don't complain about it anymore. And I'll tell you why. Because when the next issue comes down the road, they don't seem to make an intelligent choice. And that's why I say, like, when someone's not drinking anymore, they have to go back to these people. Not because they say, well, I haven't drank in three years. Now why are we going to go back and apologize to my grandmother? So, you know, maybe I'm exact. The carnage you left behind. Yeah, it's not to be mean to you. And I think that's what a lot of people don't do when they say, okay, I'm okay with gay marriage, I'm okay with gay people. I think part of it, you have to go back and realize the things that you. What you did to people, what you left behind, so you don't do it again. I think there's a ton of people that say they're okay on podcasts, comedians, they say they're okay with gay marriage, but they're not. I bet when no one's around, they might go, you know, I don't care, but it still grosses me out alone. I see them kissing, but, you know, I don't care. I don't care. And they move on. Because the way they're treating this new group, like, if you really realize that you messed up with that group, the next time when an issue came along with non binary people, you'd go, hold on. I made egregious decisions before that really left a lot of people and caused a lot of pain. So now this is another crossroad. This is like, it's not gay marriage, but, yeah. So I'm gonna sit back, I'm going to listen more so I don't do what I did with that. So that's why I realized a lot of people, I can tell by words, they're fighting for you go, oh, you're not okay. Yeah, yeah, you didn't get good with that. You just stopped complaining. Does that make sense? Yes, completely.

Sam Taggart (35:41)

It also is. It's like putting a band aid on your prejudice rather than working on it. Like, it's like people using different words. It's like, sometimes you'll hear someone say something that is fully offensive or misogynist, but use the word sex worker instead of prostitute. But it's like, but the thing you're saying is still offensive. You just used the right word. Or it's like, I mean, it's the equivalent of someone being like, I just don't care for LGBTQ people. It's like, well, just because you said that instead of gay or instead of, like, the f slur doesn't mean. And I think the broader issue is that you have to have, like, empathy for people with different experiences than you. You can't be going from issue to issue and relearning the same lesson Every.

Todd Glass (36:25)

You know, that's exactly. Yeah. Because, you know, you know, I forget sometimes you hear these things, and I thought it was brilliant. I steal it all the time when I'm talking about people, when they go, I don't know what words you use and what words you don't. But I'm gonna go ahead and I'll make it like, you know, whether it's retarded or gay as a. Gay as a. You know, is that they don't. They always say, I can't say it anymore. And I go, I don't want you to not say it because you can't. I want you to not say because you don't want to. Because it would be like to me, when somebody goes, oh, you can't say that anymore. I think that would be like if you went to. Let's say you went to child. You had a kid and you go to a couple child therapy to learn how to communicate with your kid better. And you're. If you're a smart person, you tell the story. Well. Yeah, I learned with my daughter. Now we went to the counseling and I learned with the new kid, I'm better. Like, you know, I don't say, you're a lazy pig. I mean, I'm a better person for it. And yes. And my relationship with all my kids is so much better. Now that would be a person that did it will. But the other way of the person who I can't say it is to go, oh, I can't call my daughter a fat, lazy pig anymore. Oh, I can't wait, you mean you want to still?

Sam Taggart (37:31)

So you stopped it by a court.

Todd Glass (37:33)

Order instead of going, oh, no, my life is better now. So, like, I don't want anyone to stop using words. I want them to want to. And that's the question, not, why don't you stop that? Why don't you want to? Yeah, and you might disagree with me, but at least now we can have an honest conversation. Why do you want to hold onto that word? And I think it's a lot because they don't realize what it leaves behind, you know, But I don't want anybody to stop saying anything if they don't want to, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

George Severis (37:59)

Well, there's almost like you need to take like an empathy test in order to, like, use whatever word you want because, like, someone like, like. Do you know the comedian Stavros Halkias? He's. He's really great. He's like a. He's a straight guy and he, like, I Think he is part of the community that sort of, like, calls things gay.

Sam Taggart (38:17)

Sure.

George Severis (38:17)

But it's like. But he is so sweet and not homophobic that I'm sort of like, yeah, you've earned it.

Sam Taggart (38:23)

It's fine. And he has. And he's doing it almost as a joke.

George Severis (38:26)

Well, it is as a joke. And I'm sort of like, he. There's like, a way you can almost, like, have the empathy and, like.

Todd Glass (38:31)

Yes.

George Severis (38:32)

Be able to do it.

Sam Taggart (38:32)

It's like, I can. I can. I mean, I don't want to get out of hot water here, but it's like, you can. I can be hanging out with a close female friend of mine, and in conversation, be like, okay. And that is. And it is not reading as a misogynist slur, but I can also be, like, a sexist guy literally calling a woman a bitch. And it is sexist. Right.

Todd Glass (38:54)

I think this is where, for what it's worth, I don't want to go on too long about this subject. Always interests me. That's where I think a lot of confusion happens when you're using it ironically. And, you know, whenever I hear a comedian, I hear Jerry Seinfeld always talk about, like, you know, this is what everyone should do. And I go, oh, I hope that's not what I sound like. I just want to say, here's what's worked for me. Sometimes in comedy, you hear adages. It's up to you whether you want to go, oh, I'm going to apply that to when I do comedy. It's up to you. You don't have to. But one of them that I heard Garry Shandling say that just stuck with me is, be careful. You're not feeding idiots. Now, you don't have to be careful. But if you say, in other words, no, I'm not racist, or I'm not homophobic, then you're probably gonna take that to heart. You can't go, no, I'm not racist. I'm not homophobic. Hey, how about that adage? Do you apply that to your act? Be careful. You might be feeding idiots to go, no. Well, then you're probably not 100%, because I think you would. I don't want. If you could have a joke and know from your heart you're not. But can you go, would somebody in the audience that is racist or homophobic or sexist, would you feed them? And I think that's why some of that stuff. Sometimes you got to be careful.

Sam Taggart (40:02)

No, it's because it can be interpreted.

Todd Glass (40:04)

It can be Interpreted and feed and audience and sort of. That's a good point. You know, that's. Anyway, but, but that I try to be careful that like because I have, you know, when I'm around my house. Yes. I have a twisted sense of humor because I know one fucking hundred percent the people that I'm in my living room with know that it's just absurd.

Sam Taggart (40:23)

Right.

Todd Glass (40:23)

And that's why it's so funny. You know, it's like after you have a very intelligent conversation at your house about being who you are and then all of a sudden go, oh, you know, Lisa's coming over, she's bringing her girlfriend. I go, oh, she dates a girl. Gross. You know, in that moment. But an audience doesn't know, you know, if you're using it ironically or not or what your complete feelings are. Yeah, anyway, it's a good point.

Sam Taggart (40:44)

And of course what complicates it even further is like a non in person audience because you can, you can build an audience like you at this point, have like a. People know you enough that when you go to a show they like, maybe share your politics, maybe share your point of view, but then a random person can find a video of you and be the idiot that you are inadvertently, accidentally feeding. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's a good point. Which complicates the.

George Severis (41:09)

Complicate things.

Todd Glass (41:09)

Yeah. And you decide whether you want to sort of take that into consideration sometimes. Yeah. And that's the comedian's choice.

George Severis (41:16)

The comedian's choice.

Sam Taggart (41:17)

Comedian's choice, yeah.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (41:29)

Friday, kick off the Winter Olympics in style with the opening ceremony from Italy featuring a special performance by Mariah Carey. Celebrate the greatest athletes from around the globe as they come together to go for gold.

Todd Glass (41:45)

Lipsy for sensational.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (41:47)

The opening ceremony of the Winter Olympics.

Todd Glass (41:50)

Ilium Malady. Redefining this Sport.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (41:53)

Friday at 8 Eastern, 7 Central on NBC and Peacock.

iHeartRadio Event Promoter (41:57)

This Sunday, iHeartRadio brings you live to Levi's Stadium in Santa Clara for the Super Bowl 60 tailgate concert presented by NetApp. It's the ultimate pre game party featuring an exclusive performance from Teddy Swims. Your front row experience will be on iHeartrading radio stations across the country and the free iHeartradio app this Sunday at 3:30 Eastern, 12:30 Pacific. Then after the concert, tune in to the Super Bowl 60 pregame show on NBC.

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iHeart Podcast Announcer (43:31)

US Olympic gold medalist Tara Davis Woodhull.

Todd Glass (43:33)

And I'm US Paralympic gold medalist Hunter Woodhull.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (43:36)

As athletes, our lives are about having a clear path and a team that.

Todd Glass (43:39)

You can can absolutely trust.

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So when it came to getting the best mortgage, we chose PennyMac. PennyMac is proud to be the official mortgage provider of Team USA and you.

Todd Glass (43:49)

Learn more at pennymac.com pennymac loan services llc/housing lender nmls id 35953 licensed by the Department of Financial Protection and Innovation under the California Residential Mortgage Lending Act. Conditions and restrict.

George Severis (44:09)

Well, should we get into our topic?

Sam Taggart (44:10)

Yes, I would love that.

George Severis (44:11)

Okay, Todd, what is your straight topic today and what is straight about it?

Todd Glass (44:15)

Oh, geez. No. When I saw that in there, I was like, what do you mean? The one we talked about? It's so. So it's a perfect topic. Okay.

George Severis (44:25)

Yeah, it's perfect.

Sam Taggart (44:26)

I don't want you to be insecure about it. It's a great topic.

Todd Glass (44:28)

I have a problem. Like people that have houses and they have money. These people. I see it in videos. I see it in like where they build a fire pit and they put cement benches all around it. You know what I mean? Like cement benches.

Sam Taggart (44:42)

Oh, you're talking indoor fire pit. I was imagining like a bonfire. Okay. Yes. I love this same one.

George Severis (44:46)

Well, it's on like a patio.

Todd Glass (44:47)

It's on a patio.

Sam Taggart (44:48)

Oh, okay, got it.

George Severis (44:49)

Got.

Todd Glass (44:49)

It's outdoor patio. It's a gas. Maybe it's a gas fire pit, maybe it's not. But then I see, oh, this Is a. This one sucks.

Sam Taggart (44:55)

No, it's great.

George Severis (44:56)

Keep going.

Todd Glass (44:57)

So, like, whenever I watch it, I go, what? Who's going to cozy up on a cement.

Sam Taggart (45:02)

On a cement.

Todd Glass (45:03)

And also. So when you have people over the house, the best thing to do is have a fire pit and then have like maybe five if. Hey, look, if you have tons of money, which I don't, but if you do these people that build these fire pits that you know are $30,000, you get the high end Adirondacks chairs, you put four around it, then you have six behind, maybe the garage. So if it builds, you know, you can get a fire pit with four, and then you can widen it and keep pulling the chairs out and get seven or eight, but with cement benches. And I was looking, I go, what the fuck? You just spent $30,000. Who? And a landscaper that went to school. He went to. This is his thing. And no one went, you know, you're not going to be able to get. What are you gonna. So the joke is, me and my friend, we always send each other pictures of, you know, like, I'll go online, a landscaping company and look at the work they've done. I go, oh, look, we just got a fire pit done. You gotta come over. It's so cozy. You know, last night we sat with a blanket, we cozied up on our cement bench. So that's my sort of.

George Severis (46:00)

Well, you're literally pointing to, like, lack of fluidity, like a home that is like, we know there will only be four people here at any given time. That is the max it can seat. And it's like, that's because we have, like, our nuclear family and that's whoever is going to be here.

Sam Taggart (46:16)

Well, there's also sort of sanitized. Like, you want your house to be Architectural digest ready so much that you're willing to sacrifice comfort and like, yeah, you're making people wanting to be perfect.

George Severis (46:28)

To a point where it gets clinical is very.

Todd Glass (46:30)

The Adirondacks chairs are just as nice completely. And by the way, even if you had four comfortable chairs around there, and that's it, you never widen it, but at least they are comfortable. You can, you know. But, you know, I.

George Severis (46:44)

I'm curious. You love to host. Like, this is an interesting thing about you is like, you love, like, you care so much about ambiance and vibe, and it's maybe one of, like, I think the straight thing. Like, what. There is a difference where, like, straight people are sort of like, not putting the weight on it that it deserves.

Todd Glass (47:05)

You Know, I always wonder if that's true or not because, you know, I like, like, you know, like how many stuff is societally. Like there's people that are straight, 100% straight. I know I'm 100% gay. I'm not on this, you know, but I believe people are on the spectrum. On that spectrum. I'm not. So I believe there's a but, you know, they can be in the closet over other things.

Sam Taggart (47:23)

That's what's very good point.

Todd Glass (47:25)

The good part about. I think I asked a friend of mine that's having trouble. I'll get to the. With, you know, everything. I call it not a sexual revolution, but people identifying different. She's having such a hard time with it. And I said, can I ask you a question? Isn't there anything. Can't you join in? Even if it's not your sexuality, even if you're straight and you are straight from your heart, you're not lying. Isn't there anything? Because for me there is, you know, outside of being gay, like, I have other things that I was personal about or my. I used to hide my. My love of ambiance on stage. I never talked about it because I thought it would make me look gay. Of course, I mean, while probably kissing guys made me look gay. But.

George Severis (48:04)

It's hard to tell.

Sam Taggart (48:05)

But.

Todd Glass (48:06)

But I. I think that there's a lot of straight people probably that are better at it than they admit. They just keep it. And those times are changing with that too. That's what I like about it. It's harder. People used to go have good gaydar. They're not their gay R isn't as good as the years pass on because there's a lot of straight guys that are comfortable in their. Who they are and if they happen to be flamboyant and. And so I like that that it's harder for people to tell now. But I care. I mean I'm constantly. Can't believe how wrong. And when I say wrong, I don't mean right for me. People go, well, Todd, no, no wrong ambiance is so, so done wrong. You go over someone's house and it's so fucking bright. I go, what are you doing? That's why I'm afraid to go over some people's houses. Like they go, come on over. We're having a New Year's Eve party. I go, if I go over and you have every light on, I'm gonna be miserable completely. And. And so like I'm constantly like, you know, at my house I just. You know what I say? When you go to a resort and they have torches, it's low lit. So just do that, you know.

Sam Taggart (49:08)

Right. Like emulate the thing you think of as having a good ambiance. Yeah, yeah.

Todd Glass (49:11)

But people get it off. People get it wrong. Yeah.

Sam Taggart (49:15)

Well, also. Go ahead.

George Severis (49:16)

Well, I do some. I am torn on whether it's like, I'm just shy of showing my IBLs or if I literally don't get it, because sometimes you'll go to someone's house and you're like. But you do live like this. Like, you are, like, suffering from these lights every single day.

Todd Glass (49:28)

Do you know what my ex said? That I ruined him. Like, when he's at a wedding and it's so bright, he goes, I used to never take it in.

Sam Taggart (49:35)

Oh, forget it.

Todd Glass (49:36)

And then no one's dancing. No wonder no one's fucking dancing. It's bright. And these are wedding planners. This is what you do. So he was telling me that a friend of his said, you know, my new girlfriend is much better at ambience than I was, because now I don't fight it. I love it. And I love the term he used. He goes, I was suffering just unknowingly.

George Severis (49:55)

Wow.

Todd Glass (49:56)

I was unknowingly suffering because he likes the new way so much better. Hey, look, if you're someone that likes your house bright, okay, fine, there's maybe a small sector. But I think most people, they just don't think about it. They'll come over my house and they'll have a little conversation and go, oh, my God, I appreciate this so much. So I feel comfortable to go over to their house. And I get there, I'm like, what the fuck? Like, I can't hang out here. And I'm not nitpicking. I. When I'm saying 10 is its brightness, I'm talking about like. Like we're shooting something with lights. I'm talking about this. Brighter than this.

George Severis (50:26)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (50:27)

Oh, completely.

Todd Glass (50:27)

Yeah. And you're like, who's gonna want to hang out here? Restaurants do it a lot.

George Severis (50:32)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (50:32)

I mean, the. The what you're describing about, like, men being taught something by their wives and then realizing they have been suffering in silence this whole time, I think expands to so many other things. It's like, I like, for example, it's like, men will just, like, not buy underwear. They'll be wearing old, tattered underwear. And then their wives will be like, so you should buy new underwear every few years. And then they'll do it and they'll be like, oh, my God, it's so much better. I feel so much more comfortable all the time.

Todd Glass (50:58)

Yeah, I'm sure there's things that I have like that, too, that I didn't use. Well, you know what? In my first relationship, I didn't used to trim my nails. Now, they weren't gross. Like, on a scale from 1 to 10, they weren't a 10.

George Severis (51:11)

Sure.

Todd Glass (51:11)

But they were 5 or 6. Interesting. And now I'm, like, obsessed with. I think about Chris all the time and. Trim your nails. Trim your nails. Trim your nails. Yeah. And I remember we used to go talk about how, like, this has changed time with me and being. I used to want to get a pedicure because it did feel good afterwards. But we were mortified. I mean, I was like, 20 something. He was. So we would make up this story that we were going to a wedding, and our girlfriend, it was in San Diego, and our girlfriend said, if we don't get pedicures, they're not going on the beach with us.

Sam Taggart (51:42)

Now, that's classic.

George Severis (51:43)

That's amazing.

Todd Glass (51:44)

And we would go out of our way to go to tell that story, and we couldn't go to the same place to get a pedicure because then. How many weddings do you have now? It's like, so funny. Like, of course I don't care anymore. And I go and I get one.

George Severis (51:56)

That's amazing.

Todd Glass (51:57)

But little things like that life's, you know. Oh, wow.

Sam Taggart (52:01)

Well, this is. I mean, I've told this story before, but this is the classic story that I told you where my dad went to, like, buy underwear, but was afraid of seeming like he cared too much. So he just goes to the sales. The salesperson's like, what are you looking for? And he goes, my mom usually just.

George Severis (52:15)

Buys them for me, but that's better.

Sam Taggart (52:17)

He was like, you know, 27 at the time. Like, he was, like, too old to be saying that, but he just is like, I can't be bothered with aesthetics. And that's something my mom does.

George Severis (52:27)

Well, this is. We do have, like, a leg up on, like, ambiance, I think, because, like, it's almost. I do think we're like. We have a bit of an arms race of ambiance in, like, the gay community. Yes, well, where it's like, there's a competition of, like. Well, I went to his apartment and it was actually gorgeous. And they actually have this style of lamp. And I'm like, I didn't know we were doing that style of land. And then it's like, I Go home. And I'm like, well, fuck, my lamps are fucking hideous completely. And I'm like, well, I gotta go to the store.

Todd Glass (52:53)

Got it.

George Severis (52:53)

Time to go on ebay and find the perfect vintage lamp. Because that's what we all have to have.

Sam Taggart (52:58)

But you know what? This is the opposite. You're talking about being closeted, about loving ambiance. I think in the current era of like, or I guess if you live in a community where everyone is out, everyone is comfortable, you're no longer. You don't have any issues with your masculinity or with your homosexuality or whatever. Almost the opposite happens where you feel like because you are a gay man, you should know about ambiance, but you sometimes don't have an inherent talent for it. This is so you like go. Because so you're like, okay, well it has to look fabulous. But I'm not gonna. And I'm gonna just trust my gut. And then suddenly you have like a purple tinted lamp, like tutus on the chair. Like it's you, you, you, you think that more is more.

George Severis (53:43)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (53:44)

And you're like, like it's all, it's like the opposite of being ashamed of your instincts and not trusting them. You trust them too much.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (53:50)

Yeah.

George Severis (53:51)

You're not self critical. Yes, exactly.

Sam Taggart (53:52)

You lose this self criticism and you're like, being gay is enough. Like anything I, anything I choose will inherently be tasteful because I'm the man.

George Severis (53:58)

This touch.

Sam Taggart (53:59)

Yeah.

George Severis (53:59)

Anything I touch turns to ambiance.

Todd Glass (54:01)

I'm always trying to con what you're talking about. Like, is it, you know, is it, is it women do this or men are like that? How much of it's societal?

George Severis (54:09)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (54:09)

And some of it. I don't believe women are. I believe women can be biologically less baby horny than this is my theory. I could be totally wrong. I'm wide open to go, oh, I used to think that. With that said, I don't think it's biological how much women are that less horny than men. I think it might be, but not to the proportions. Because they were shamed.

George Severis (54:30)

Yeah. Yeah.

Todd Glass (54:30)

So I think the same thing with ambiance. I wonder, you know, how much of that is because they're ashamed or the. Like when we used to go, gay people have good taste, I thought maybe it's because they're not getting married, they're staying in the closet, they can still go to the gym, they didn't have kids.

Sam Taggart (54:45)

It's an outlet.

Todd Glass (54:46)

Comes to make the house nicer. So I think that changes as gay People have kids more, and now they don't have time to go to the gym. And maybe their house isn't as perfect. Because.

Sam Taggart (54:56)

That's a good point.

Todd Glass (54:57)

Because they're joining a lot of those things that get in the way of that. So it's not as.

George Severis (55:02)

It's a really good point.

Sam Taggart (55:03)

That's a very good point. It's also, you know, they. If you're. If you're facing more prejudice, if you're closeted, you suppress so much that it comes out in other, like, all your creative energy that maybe would have been put into having better relationships or whatever, it comes out and just couches, sofas, armchairs.

Todd Glass (55:19)

Fabric.

Sam Taggart (55:20)

Fabric. Yeah. And now it's like, okay, you have, like, designer twins. You work at the big company. Your taste is just as bad as.

Todd Glass (55:28)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (55:28)

As. As. As your straight neighbors.

Todd Glass (55:30)

Because my friend goes. I told him about. I go straight culture. Like, because I saw the thing.

Sam Taggart (55:34)

He was.

Todd Glass (55:35)

Maybe he was cargo shorts.

Sam Taggart (55:37)

Perfect example.

Todd Glass (55:38)

There's a lot of gay guys wearing cargo shorts where you live. That's the thing, you know, it depends where you live.

Sam Taggart (55:43)

That's so funny.

George Severis (55:44)

Cargo shorts are back.

Sam Taggart (55:45)

I know they're.

Todd Glass (55:46)

I know. I saw it there the other day. I go, I can't. They're back, but not for me.

George Severis (55:50)

I got some last summer and I. They're coming out again this summer.

Sam Taggart (55:53)

Well, they are. The thing with all those things, they are so comfortable. And once you. If you just convince yourself that you don't mind looking like you're wearing cargo shorts, then.

Todd Glass (56:00)

I saw a pair of cargo sweatpants the other day. Yeah, it looks so comfortable.

Sam Taggart (56:04)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (56:05)

I go, I don't know if I could get.

Sam Taggart (56:07)

I know, but.

George Severis (56:09)

So the fire pit as a symbol generally, I also do think has some, like, straightness to it, like, camping as a thing. Even if it's, like, in your backyard, you're, like, taking camping and, like, putting it in a cage. And then like, there's like, Like. Because to be in a. Around a fire pit, it implies, like, camp songs and even, like, whiskey.

Sam Taggart (56:33)

Yeah.

George Severis (56:33)

Like, stuff that's, like. Has all these things of. I guess it's just, like, regimentedness. That feels very straight to me.

Sam Taggart (56:39)

Well, it also gives the man of the house something to do. That's it. He's like, that's it. He's building a fire. That is, like, the most validating in terms of someone's masculinity. Thing they can do.

George Severis (56:51)

Yeah. It's like, yeah, you make. Make food every day, and, like, it's like barbecue. But like, look, he built the fire.

Sam Taggart (56:56)

Exactly. Yeah.

George Severis (56:57)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (56:57)

You know, I, I remember once in school, I was like, in and out of special schools. This has to do with, like, being embarrassed of. And I liked landscaping a lot. Even when I was in second grade, I was a nar. I was. Couldn't see landscapers. I was like, wow. I just wanted to be a landscaper so bad. My mom told my teacher in special school that I went to Wordsworth Academy, that I like plants. So I remember the teacher going to me. She goes, todd, because she was trying to build my confidence. My mom said, well, he's good at plants. Ask him questions about that. She goes, todd, your mom said you knew a lot about plants, because then she was going to ask me a question. I go, what? Yeah. She goes, your mom said, I was in, like, sixth grade, you know, a lot of plants. I go, shrubs. Because I thought that was not as.

Sam Taggart (57:41)

That was not as gay.

Todd Glass (57:42)

That was not as gay. So it was like, shrubs.

Sam Taggart (57:45)

I think he means shrubs.

Todd Glass (57:46)

Yeah, I think you mean shrubs. Cubs, you know, because. And then she goes, well, what is this? And I was so. She was so sweet. All my teachers were. But I was so, you know, it probably knew I was gay at that point and everything. She. And she goes, well, this plant here, what's wrong with it? It's not doing well. And I go, it has ick. You need to throw it out. Ick isn't even a disease. Plants get fish Got it. And we had a fish tank, so I knew the fish would get ick. So I go, but it was so mean. I think back, how mean. This poor teacher, she was probably 23 years old, you know, And I'm like, throw it out there. You didn't boost my confidence. Confidence. Shrubs.

George Severis (58:18)

It's so funny what we apply, like, shame to, like, up to me, a plant. I'm like, that's the most masculine thing you can care about. It's like a plant in a yard.

Sam Taggart (58:25)

But it is complicated because gardening is so good. But then, like, landscaping is so scary.

Todd Glass (58:30)

I, I backhoe shrubs, baby. Shrubs.

Sam Taggart (58:34)

It's.

George Severis (58:34)

Yeah, that's amazing.

Todd Glass (58:36)

I love. I, I, you know, besides coming out, you know, about 10 years ago, like we just mentioned, I. I have loved, like, so many other things. I'm so happy that I'm, like I said, sort of not fighting this, because there's a lot of gay people that are giving other groups struggling a hard time. Like, they keep. They always get mad that people keep adding letters to the end of it. Look, it's hard for Me to remember, too, but shut the up. Let them add more letters, you know, but whatever. But. But I'm. I'm joining. I like it to be more and more just comfortable in my skin. Not bad. You know, like. Like there's other things. Like, I remember saying this even 10 years ago, and I go, oh, you can get that out of your vocabulary. When I was talking about something like my weight, I would go, Sometimes when you repeat it now, you even hate to, because it's so like, oh, I don't want to be. Well, it's not a big deal what I'm about to say. Yeah, but I can do better. I go, I talk about my weight. I go, I don't mean to be a woman about it. And I go, what do you mean, a woman about it? Honest? Isn't that what you're really talking about? So I stop that. Like, just talk about your weight. Like, go, I'm a little. I feel a little fat right now. I don't. I don't. You know, but yeah, back then, I would go, well, I don't want to be a woman about it. It's like assigning that. That they care about their weight, but men don't. Men do.

George Severis (59:46)

They care about just as much in a big way. I have a question that is maybe annoying and maybe we can skip. I came out of the closet. You sort of do this thing in that era. I don't think people do it anymore where you're like, oh, well, it's not gonna be like, my whole personality. That's what I remember, like, telling my friends, which is, like, problematic in many ways. But I was like, don't worry, I'm still me. I'm not gonna make it my whole personality. And the joke I make now is, obviously, that's a lie. It's fully my whole personality. It's who I hang out with. It's music I listen to, the books I read, the movies I watch. It's my whole personality. I was lying to them. And have you found. Since publicly coming out, have your interests changed at all? Are you actually. This thing that I thought I wouldn't like, I do. Like, did that change your interests in any way?

Todd Glass (60:27)

I think just being opened and sometimes I'll ask myself that. I'll go, like, even with my voice, like, I swear, this seems so weird. But one night I went. My friend goes. I go, I talk like. I think this is how I talk. Like, is it? Or is it. Is it? So what do you call it when it's repressed and you don't realize it's.

George Severis (60:44)

Like a learned behavior.

Todd Glass (60:44)

Yeah. Like, it's. I'm sure there's got to be some of that. Like, I have no desire. I don't. Unless it's repressed or what I wear. You know, Like, I. But I imagine I get when somebody wants to wear a dress or something like that. I understand that they. But, like, wonder, you know, it may mean it'd be my thing, but I wonder if how much of it's repressed. But, no, I think a lot of it is just. I became more comfortable to talk about it. And there's probably other things I can't think of right now, but a lot of things like that I thought that I would just, you know, keep to myself and stuff or. Like, I remember driving to my friend's house, and when I was in a relationship, I would drive and. But I let my ex drive. But then I. When we were a block away, I would switch and get in the car. Sometimes I think back about that, and it's like. Like, it's sad and it's cute and it's. And it's depressing. Like, what we did one time. One time, we had a fire. Something happened in our neighborhood, and the fire department had to knock on the door. I wish I was making this up. I'm not exaggerating it. So we slept in one room, and in the other room, the bed stayed made. The fire department was coming in the house for some reason, to get through the backyard, they needed to get through our house. You know, of course, you let them do whatever they want, want. And we went in and messed up the other bed.

Sam Taggart (61:59)

In case the fire department is like, wait a minute. There's a full fire happening. They're like, wait a minute.

Todd Glass (62:04)

I think these guys. Are these two guys.

Sam Taggart (62:06)

These two guys gay.

George Severis (62:07)

Why is this one unmade and this one's made?

Todd Glass (62:09)

And we get the absurdity of it.

George Severis (62:11)

We got amazing.

Todd Glass (62:12)

We get the absurdity of it. That's when people go, no one cares here. This is not about that. This is our deep, you know, denial of wanting anybody to know. But sometimes when I tell that story. Did you make that up? No, I know I didn't. And, you know, because, yeah, we messed the bed up.

George Severis (62:27)

That's amazing. We. Oh, we were joking on a recent app that being closeted is like having military training. Like, you're, like, thinking, I saw steps ahead.

Todd Glass (62:35)

I think you're absolutely right. You learn to be, like, very unassuming, stay out of the way. And I think sometimes for Maybe bad like that.

Sam Taggart (62:44)

Well, it also hardens you because you're treating yourself so poorly that you actually implicitly give yourself permission to treat others poorly like you are. You have this hardened shell, and you think of vulnerability as bad.

George Severis (62:57)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (62:57)

Yes.

George Severis (62:58)

Wow, that is wild.

Todd Glass (63:00)

I remember one other quick thing. I think that's why, you know, like, a lot of people, you know, they become causes. And I'm sure it happens with me, with other people's. I just.

George Severis (63:10)

Oh.

Todd Glass (63:10)

Think it's a cause. No, there's people like these stories completely. You get here. I think it's good to hear these stories, and I think I share them for a reason. People go, oh, I. I knew that people were in the closet, what it meant, but I didn't know what it meant. I'm not the only one. The other thing was we. I have a duplex, and above it, my friend Andrea lived with her friend Nikki as she rent. You know, she rented it, and we were really close friends. And when I was having friends in from out of town, I would go, andrea, please come downstairs just for 10 minutes. And I would offer her, like, some big thing that she needed. I'll go, I'll do it. And she. I could just come down for 10 minutes just because when my friends came in the door, there were girls there. And, like, that was so pathetic. Just please. Just for 10 minutes. Yes, please. And then my friends would come in. Hey, how you doing? Everything. And then they would go upstairs and there were. Okay, yeah, there's girls around. This place is a pussy palace.

George Severis (64:02)

Oh, my God. I. I do. This is interesting. I think both of. I mean, at least I'll speak for myself. I like to, like, like, kind of erase the closet at times. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. But now I'm so out, and everyone knows how comfortable I am, blah, blah, blah, blah. And it is, like, interesting to revisit and be like, all this stuff was very real. And I forget about it. That's so.

Todd Glass (64:23)

You do forget. Until sometimes somebody. One other quick thing, please. When I used to set the table, I used to tell Andrea a lot or my friend Gina. I go, gina, if anybody asks, I go, you say you set the table. And I go, don't. And then one time, I'm only have the anger that I had then, because sometimes you want to lessen the anger because you realize how absurd it is now. But I'll give you the anger that I had. They go, oh, my God, the table looks so nice. Who said it? She goes, todd did. He didn't want Me to tell anybody. I was so fucking mad. I was like, just after everybody left, I go with Andrew, what do you fucking do that for? I was so embarrassed. So after that, I would give her. It was like a drill. I go, okay, what are you going to say when people ask you, set the table? So then she went the other extreme, which was all right. But she would laugh. She goes, oh, it was nothing. She would always. And meanwhile, I'd be like, well, you don't have to say it's nothing. Take the glory. It's nothing. It did. It takes me two minutes. I'm quit. But yeah, that time. And I remember, like, yeah, how embarrassed I was that she said, oh, Todd said he didn't want anybody to know.

George Severis (65:23)

Oh, my God, the gay guy touched to set a table and have people take note. I've got to take a peek at this table.

Sam Taggart (65:29)

Well, it's also like, this will happen with women friends who just love you and want to support you. But when you're closeted, it feels like a betrayal because they'll be like, Todd is so great. He's so good at Insert gay thing here. He's so good at setting the table. He has such an amazing taste in fashion. Whatever. And you're like, don't say that. Don't say that. There was this family friend when I was a kid that used to come over and we would play with Barbies. And in my mind it was, you know, it's something that happened behind closed doors. We were in a bedroom and we were playing with Barbies. And the parents didn't have to know that that's what we were doing. And then one time she came and she goes, I brought the Barbies because you like playing with them so much. And suddenly my secret was out. And you could hear a pin drop because both sets of parents were like, how do we deal with what was just said?

Todd Glass (66:17)

Yeah, it's so funny that. That type of stuff. Yes. I relate with.

George Severis (66:24)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (66:24)

I have a distinct memory of my grandmother walking in on me playing with a bar because I have two younger sisters. So over our house, playing with the Barbie, walking in, seeing me do it, and then walking out of the room. And then. And then I'm like, where is she? Where is she? And she was outside having a cigarette and she was like, like puffing. Puffing with a cigarette. Being like, I need a second to like, process what just happened. And then we can talk.

George Severis (66:49)

Oh, so funny.

Todd Glass (66:50)

I remember my mom or somebody saying, me and my ex. Ex. Yeah, Chris. Oh. And they. They were Being nice. I should have been appreciative of it. They. They. My mom didn't care. She would go, oh, my God. They're like Martha Stewart, the two of them. I'm like, oh, my God. Are you shitting me? You need to shut the up. My home.

Sam Taggart (67:10)

Well, yeah. You think everything's a slur. Someone will be like, your wedding is so chic. And you're like, oh, so you mean gay.

Todd Glass (67:15)

Yeah, just say it.

George Severis (67:16)

Just say gay then.

Todd Glass (67:18)

Now, not so. Oh, my God. When I hear these stories, it gets me well up tight.

Sam Taggart (67:23)

I know.

Todd Glass (67:24)

Thinking about it, the Barbie.

Sam Taggart (67:26)

I know it's.

Todd Glass (67:27)

I. I remember I was afraid to have my. I. I wish I would have had my mom on my podcast before she died, just two years ago. But I was afraid, like, does she know stuff that she's going to tell? Oh, my God. Todd used to comb my hair. I'm like, oh, my God. I was like, that was the most embarrassing thing. But I go, I didn't want to say mom, don't mention.

Sam Taggart (67:46)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Todd Glass (67:48)

When I was. When I was like, I don't know how old, probably in like, second grade, you know?

George Severis (67:52)

You know, wow. Yeah.

Todd Glass (67:55)

Even now I tell that I feel a little. I feel a little gay.

Sam Taggart (67:59)

Yeah.

George Severis (67:59)

Well, this is the space for it.

Todd Glass (68:01)

Even for me to say I'm gay is pretty cool. Every time I say it. Do you know that? I don't know about you guys, but right now when I say it, I go, I'm appreciative. I can say it.

Sam Taggart (68:09)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (68:09)

And also know, is this a better life than you thought you'd have?

Sam Taggart (68:13)

Completely.

Todd Glass (68:13)

Because I, My. I'm not making this up. My. My thing was I was going to meet. I met another guy and he was like me, just. Just a regular guy. And we were friends and we both bonded that our idea was. We didn't have follow through with this idea we were gonna meet a girl that had cancer and then she would die. And then you say, oh, I never got over. Blah, blah, blah. That was a plan. And he liked the plan. He goes, that's. I had a plan like that, but in hindsight. And I wrote a book and I wanted to call. All I ever wanted to meet was a nice girl with cancer. And then they didn't want to let me call it that. And Simon and Schuster was so nice. Nice that I. That I gave up on it. You know, I said, okay, because they were so wonderful with the whole process. And I was nervous and I. And I thought I. I didn't even want to Use the word closet in the book.

Sam Taggart (68:58)

Because that.

Todd Glass (68:58)

Get out of the closet. I hated that too. Not anymore. But yeah. So I go, how about if we call it all I ever wanted to mean is a nice girl with cancer and other dumb things. I said to keep the closet door shut. So it sort of explains it in the title. Yeah, I still think that would have been a better title.

Sam Taggart (69:10)

I mean, that's a great. On the longer side.

Todd Glass (69:12)

It's a bit longer with the subtitle wanted to be. I even said, no, it's very good. All I ever wanted to meet was a nice girl with a terminal disease. I was like, how's that?

Sam Taggart (69:20)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (69:20)

And then smaller writing and other things.

Sam Taggart (69:22)

But yeah, but you can't say cancer anymore.

Todd Glass (69:26)

Hello.

George Severis (69:26)

You can't say that's. No, I do remember.

Todd Glass (69:30)

This is like.

George Severis (69:30)

I don't know.

Todd Glass (69:31)

I'm.

George Severis (69:31)

Yeah, I'm like already. I just remember being in high school and being like journaling and being like, okay, so you're gay, but you obviously that's not going to happen. So you can do this. You're very smart. You're good at working. Like, like you can have one family. That'll be fun. And then you'll do trips and you'll be weird on the trips.

Sam Taggart (69:47)

Right? The three dimensional chest. You play with yourself. You're like, okay, so the one thing I obviously can't do is live authentically. So we can start from there. So now how do we. So that's sort of the foundation upon which my life is built. It is a lie. And then outside of that, let's see, I could make a lot of money and so then I could afford.

George Severis (70:05)

Well, it's literally like, okay, so I have to like, you're in high school and you're like, I need to get into a good college.

Sam Taggart (70:09)

Yeah.

George Severis (70:09)

So they can make enough money to support both my family. That's a fraud. And then pay for big vacations just for me. It's so crazy.

Sam Taggart (70:18)

It is.

Todd Glass (70:18)

And I think it's in the same line. I remember like these things that don't have follow through these ideas you have, you know, and one of them was, I never did anything with a girl. I never fooled around with a girl. Did either of you?

George Severis (70:32)

I did.

Sam Taggart (70:32)

I mean, I like made out with girls.

George Severis (70:36)

I've had sex with girls.

Todd Glass (70:38)

I know one day my friend Jimmy wanted to. He was like this girl. And the other girl, now I knew she just had a baby. She was like 22 years old. She just had a baby. Now just because she had a baby doesn't mean she wouldn't want to fool around.

Sam Taggart (70:50)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (70:50)

But I remember I was in the car and my friend Jimmy and his, that other girl went in the house and we're sitting in the car and I go, Todd, please, she's got a baby already. Like to me that was okay. I don't have to have sex.

Sam Taggart (70:59)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (70:59)

Yeah. And I, and I'm not kidding. This is the most I ever did with a girl. And I was like, Todd, you gotta do it. I took my hand and I put it on her knee and then I got it right off and I just made an excuse to get out of the car. I go, hey, let's go see what they're doing. Y But like why did I think that her having a baby, like it's that thing like crazy. She's never going to want to fool around again just cuz she had a baby, you know.

Sam Taggart (71:21)

Yeah. Also putting the onus on her.

George Severis (71:22)

Yeah.

Sam Taggart (71:23)

Being like it's not me. She had a baby.

George Severis (71:25)

She was like so weird. Ever since the baby, she doesn't even want to pull her out.

Sam Taggart (71:27)

Exactly.

Todd Glass (71:28)

Yeah. You know. Women.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (71:40)

Friday Kick off the Winter Olympics in style with the opening ceremony from Italy featuring a special performance by Mariah Carey. Celebrate the greatest athletes from around the globe as they come together to go for gold.

Todd Glass (71:56)

Lindsey Vaughn. Sensational.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (71:58)

The opening ceremony of the Winter Olympics. Ilia Malady redefining this Sport Friday at 8 Eastern, 7 Central on NBC and Peacock.

iHeartRadio Event Promoter (72:09)

This Sunday, iHeartRadio brings you live to Levi's Stadium in Santa Clara for the Super Bowl 60 tailgate concert presented by NetApp. It's the ultimate pre game party featuring an exclusive performance from Teddy Swims. Your front row experience will be on iHeartradio stations across the country and the free iHeartradio app this Sunday at 3:30 Eastern, 12:30 Pacific. Then after the concert, tune in to the Super Bowl 60 pregame show on NBC.

Sponsor Voice (72:41)

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iHeart Podcast Announcer (73:43)

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Todd Glass (73:45)

And I'm US Paralympic gold medalist Hunter Woodhull.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (73:47)

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Todd Glass (73:51)

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Todd Glass (74:00)

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Sam Taggart (74:20)

Shall we do our final segment?

George Severis (74:21)

I think we should.

Sam Taggart (74:23)

Okay. Do you want. Oh. Our final segment is called Shout Outs. We give. It's an homage to the straight tradition of the radio shout outs. So you're, you know, you're on Z100, you're shouting out something you love. You're saying, you know, I want to give a shout out to shrubs. And we think of them on the spot. That's why we're both stalling right now. We think of them on the spot, we'll go and then you can go.

Todd Glass (74:44)

Okay.

Sam Taggart (74:45)

All right, so let's see.

Todd Glass (74:46)

Can I ask you one more question?

Sam Taggart (74:47)

Please, please.

Todd Glass (74:47)

If I have something I want to plug. No, no.

Sam Taggart (74:49)

We'll do that and we'll do that at the end.

Todd Glass (74:50)

We'll do that at.

Sam Taggart (74:51)

Beautiful, Beautiful. No, don't worry, we will.

George Severis (74:54)

I have one.

Sam Taggart (74:55)

Okay.

George Severis (74:56)

What's up, freaks, losers and perverts around the globe? I want to give a shout out to Chili.

Todd Glass (75:00)

The food.

George Severis (75:01)

I think chili is often maligned, uses a punchline, and I think it no longer should be. I think this is a good food. It's spicy, it's easy to make. Not that I touch the stuff, but plus, it's easy for me. Should I make Folks, I don't know how to cook.

Sam Taggart (75:15)

Sam doesn't cook.

George Severis (75:15)

But it's quick. It's delicious. Delicious. Protein, heavy. I'll say. And people, it's. I think it's like, seen as, like, a classless food. You don't see gay guys throwing chili cook off nights. And I actually. They do have one at the Eagle. I do think we need to embrace chili as a community, and I think we need to support chili, and I think maybe it needs a rebrand, and I want to be the president of that rebrand. Shout out to chili.

Todd Glass (75:39)

Wow.

Sam Taggart (75:39)

Wow. I will do you one better. I want to give a shout out to baked beans.

Todd Glass (75:43)

Whoa.

Sam Taggart (75:43)

I am in a baked beans era. I sort of. I've never quite. It's like sugar. It's like a dessert, essentially. It is so good. Literally right out of the can. It talk about something that makes you feel massive, like a real man is having a can of baked beans. I was. I made one the other day and just literally ate the entire thing by myself in my amazing sub la sublet. So. Shout out to baked bean. Shout out to chili. You know, you're gonna be farting, but you're gonna enjoy it yourself. All right.

Todd Glass (76:14)

Oh, I want to give a shout out to bazooka bubble gum.

Sam Taggart (76:18)

Oh, nice.

Todd Glass (76:20)

It's very good. And I. I love it. I just love the taste. And it's. And it's so good. And not enough people do it. I get the bazooka, you know, the tape, and then I take little pieces.

Sam Taggart (76:32)

Oh, my God.

George Severis (76:33)

Wow.

Todd Glass (76:33)

And I love it.

George Severis (76:35)

This is so shocking.

Todd Glass (76:35)

Yes.

Sam Taggart (76:36)

And that's loose in your pocket.

Todd Glass (76:37)

It. I. Yeah, I have, like, three of them in there because I can't. Well, I also have this, but I can't always get this type of bazooka bubble gum. It's this tub here. This is already wrapped up, but I love the flavor of it. And I'll tell you a little something personal. It reminds me. One time I met this. He played minor league baseball, and it was, like, one of the first people that I've ever, like, had an experience with, which, you know what? As bad as being in the closet was the explosive. The explosiveness of figuring out.

George Severis (77:04)

Kind of hot. It's kind of hot.

Todd Glass (77:06)

That's why I know it was. What was the one? The two guys there. English heart stoppers. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That movie. That. That. That series. Really. The fingers touching. I know when straight people are. Care about a guy, cares about a girl, and their fingers touched, they get the same. It's different. This is different because. So. But he played. He played baseball, and he would always chew bazooka gum, even when we were kissing. Whoa. And it tasted so good. So to this day, whenever I think of It I think of this but the bazooka. The bazooka gum.

Sam Taggart (77:36)

So I mean that's like something out of like a war movie where it's like you bazooka gum reminds you of the man that you lost to.

George Severis (77:44)

To the. So beautiful. Well I was.

Todd Glass (77:47)

I thought you meant like a band that I like or something.

Sam Taggart (77:49)

But it can be anything. We're really, I mean we're loose.

Todd Glass (77:53)

I'll give a shout out to Andy Frasco.

Sam Taggart (77:55)

Okay.

Todd Glass (77:55)

Couch.

Sam Taggart (77:56)

Perfect. And Todd, where can people find you? What, what are you promoting? Tell us everything.

Todd Glass (78:02)

Okay. I'm going to swallow my gum.

Sam Taggart (78:04)

Do you swallow gum?

Todd Glass (78:05)

Can I tell you something?

Sam Taggart (78:06)

My husband does that and he's literally like he. And he says it's completely normal. One time I was looking for somewhere to. I was looking for a trash can and he's like, just swallow it. I was like, he's like, yeah. I always just swallow gum.

Todd Glass (78:16)

Okay. I can't say it's good. I'm sure people. I'm sure there's a reason not to do it. So I don't want to. But yes. I've been swallowing gum my whole life and I never shit a bubble that I know of. But yeah, I don't know why I just swallow it because I think it's the same as crunching a piece of candy and swallowing it. I don't think it's that different. I don't know. I'm sure a doctor would know the answer. Well, I just like the idea that.

Sam Taggart (78:37)

You just put it in your mind mouth, shoot it for like truly two seconds and then swallow it was like.

Todd Glass (78:42)

Cuz for me it was like taking a quick like take a French fry. Yeah. You know. But anyway, I love that your husband. I've never met anybody my whole life. I'm not kidding you. That, that, I'm not kidding. That said. Oh, I swallow my gum too.

Sam Taggart (78:53)

Yes.

Todd Glass (78:53)

People can't believe that I swallow my gum. So. But so the two things that drive me a he double entendre. He does.

George Severis (79:02)

It does.

Todd Glass (79:05)

Oh yeah.

Sam Taggart (79:05)

Well. And you used to not be open about swallowing your gum.

George Severis (79:09)

Now you won't shut up about it.

Sam Taggart (79:10)

Yeah. Now it's your whole personality. Oh, the gum swallower is here.

Todd Glass (79:13)

Here he comes.

George Severis (79:14)

Hide your gum.

Todd Glass (79:15)

The oh plug.

Sam Taggart (79:17)

Yes.

Todd Glass (79:17)

I long story very short. I do. You know, I've been doing stand up a long time but in the last two years I've been working on a show and I have a band in the show. It's hard to explain. There's bits. It's it's stand up comedy. If anybody wants to go see a five minute highlight reel. Todd Glass, the event of a lifetime. It's on YouTube. They can get a little smell of the show. Show. But we're going. We just did it as part of the New York Comedy festival. We did 15 shows in a very teeny little room and they all sold out. And we're going back to do Joe's Pub.

Sam Taggart (79:44)

All right.

Todd Glass (79:45)

Which if you don't know anything about Joe's Pub, I know you do. It's a very iconic place.

George Severis (79:48)

Oh, our listeners are going to know Joe's Pub.

Todd Glass (79:50)

I'm really happy about it. March 5th, 6th and 7th. I'm doing six shows and this is the type of place that I always wanted to perform at. Like, it's just. I see the pictures of it. It reeks of, like, night. Not a comedy club, but a Cool.

Sam Taggart (80:07)

Oh, yeah, it's really nice.

Todd Glass (80:09)

So I'm like, I realized how little I'm gonna have to do. That's the exciting part. I usually have to go into places and do a little transformation. I don't have to do anything.

Sam Taggart (80:17)

You were talking, I mean, with your addiction. Addiction to ambiance. You were telling me that you, like, will ask a comedy club to put black tablecloths on their table sometimes.

George Severis (80:24)

I will.

Todd Glass (80:24)

Yeah, I'll go. You know, like, even. I know this sounds weird, but I think you'll appreciate it. I know we're going in for the clothes, but, like, later in my career, look, the club has to have something I like about it. Otherwise I don't want to go. But when a club has great crowds and they've curated these great audiences. But I can't go to a club now that serves food in orange baskets with white paper. I just can't. Because, look, you can make something shabby chic. You can. That's easy to do. And I don't mean just look a little better. I've gone into places where the staff gets there and they're like two hours of just, you know, I maybe have somebody with me. Let's do this. Let's gel those lights, let's put a curtain up there. That kitchen light's coming out. Very quick fixes. And staff gets in and they're like, this isn't a little better. This is shut the fuck up. Nice.

Sam Taggart (81:07)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (81:08)

So you can do it. You can do a lot. There's a reason I was saying it. Oh, yeah. So you go. But when, when food comes out, you can do anything you want. If food comes out in an orange basket with white paper. It's like their way of going, don't even try to may pretend this is a nice place. Yeah, look at this. It's. And I always go, that's the ugliest way to serve food. And I know there's a club, one club. I always say, isn't there a club that's going to hear the. This Probably. I know.

Sam Taggart (81:31)

Yeah.

Todd Glass (81:31)

And they serve it in orange basket with white paper. How do they rationalize it to themselves? What do they say? They go, that's not the ugliest way you could serve food. Well, guess what? Send me a picture of what is. Right after the pandemic, I would. I had to ask clubs because I go, they were using plastic cups, which I got it. Most people were more comfortable with plastic cups, but you're not putting red solo fucking cups out on the table. If you have to use it, we'll use a high end, clear plastic glass class. Because I just can't be on stage. And it's just like, oh, you're in a. So Joe's is class.

Sam Taggart (82:03)

Joe's classy. There's plates, there's real silverware.

Todd Glass (82:09)

Rolled silverware. So.

Sam Taggart (82:10)

Yes. And it's from Cocktail. Oh, yeah. I'm gonna come to your. I live in New York. I'm actually just visiting here. So I. I'm gonna be there in March. So I'd love you to come.

Todd Glass (82:19)

I'll put you on the guest list if you want to go. I think you'll be. It's.

Sam Taggart (82:22)

I can't wait.

Todd Glass (82:22)

You'll be impressed.

George Severis (82:23)

Everyone go to Todd Shop show. Damn, that sounds so fun.

Sam Taggart (82:27)

That's so great. Thank you so much for doing this. We really appreciate it.

George Severis (82:30)

It's really been so nice to have you.

Todd Glass (82:31)

Yeah. Nice to meet you guys. And you're going to send me that email.

George Severis (82:33)

I'm going to forward you that email.

Sam Taggart (82:35)

Can't wait. I'm going to leak it.

Todd Glass (82:36)

Humiliating.

George Severis (82:37)

But you know, that's what life is all about.

Sam Taggart (82:39)

That's what life is all about.

George Severis (82:40)

All right, bye.

Sam Taggart (82:43)

Podcast ends now for our visual learners. You can watch full video episodes on our YouTube channel and subscribe to our.

George Severis (82:49)

Patreon for two extra episodes a month.

Sam Taggart (82:52)

At patreon.com Stradiolab Stradiolab is a production.

George Severis (82:56)

By Will Ferrell's Big Money players network.

Sam Taggart (82:58)

And iHeart podcasts, created and hosted by me, George Severis and Sam Taggart, executive.

George Severis (83:03)

Produced by Jenna Cagle, co produced by.

Sam Taggart (83:05)

Becca Ramos, edited by Lauren Stumpf and mixed and mastered by Doug Behm Artwork.

George Severis (83:09)

By Michael Fails and Matt Grubb Theme music by Ben Kling.

iHeartRadio Event Promoter (83:17)

This Sunday, iHeartRadio brings you live to Levi's Stadium in Santa Clara for the Super Bow Tailgate concert presented by NetApp. It's the ultimate pre game party featuring an exclusive performance from Teddy Swims. Your front row experience will be on iHeartradio stations across the country and the free iHeartradio app is Sunday at 3:30 Eastern, 12:30 Pacific. Then after the concert, tune in to the Super Bowl 60 pregame show on NBC.

iHeart Podcast Announcer (83:49)

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George Severis (84:18)

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iHeart Podcast Announcer (84:47)

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Todd Glass (85:19)

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