Host 1 (2:35)

We were on holiday.

Host 2 (2:36)

We were on holiday.

Host 1 (2:37)

We were on holiday.

Host 2 (2:38)

How was your holiday?

Host 1 (2:39)

Well, it was to die for. I'm so glad to hear start to finish. An amazing time.

Host 2 (2:46)

So this holiday season lasted approximately Five weeks, according to my calculations.

Host 1 (2:50)

I'm sick and tired of celebrating. I have had enough relaxation time. I need to be in the gym. I need to be.

Host 2 (2:58)

I feel disgusting.

Host 1 (2:59)

I feel horrible.

Host 2 (3:00)

I basically have been having like pad Thai for breakfast, lunch and dinner over.

Guest/Host 3 (3:04)

The last, like five weeks.

Host 1 (3:06)

It's like this holiday season has felt like sort of like. I've always wondered what happens if you give a dog like endless food. Like, what happens? And I'm the dog with endless food this holiday season. Yeah, it's like, enough. Enough.

Host 2 (3:21)

Yeah, no, it's. I really. It was siphoned out of me. It was like.

Guest/Host 3 (3:26)

It was like, oh, this is what.

Host 2 (3:27)

You wanted, you stupid whore bitch.

Host 1 (3:29)

Yeah. Yeah.

Host 2 (3:30)

Well, here, take it.

Host 1 (3:31)

Yeah, Here.

Host 2 (3:32)

I hope you enjoy this slow cooked lamb. Idiot whore.

Host 1 (3:36)

Yeah. And then last night it's like, okay, it's coming to an end. And I'm like, wait, I don't want it to end yet.

Host 2 (3:40)

Last night was the worst night of my life.

Host 1 (3:41)

Last night. We're talking. We're talking Sunday, January 4th. For those at home.

Host 2 (3:47)

Someone, actually someone in my life asked me, had the nerve to ask me if I have the. Get this Sunday Scaries, a term. I thought we had retired approximately three years ago. And I said, don't say that to me.

Host 1 (4:01)

The thing with Sunday scaries, unfortunately, I know, is that it is a real phenomenon and we have to have a name for it. The thing is, we need a serious name. We can't call it Sunday Scaries. We need to like. Like it needs to have like a medical disease name. Sure. It could be like I'm experiencing.

Host 2 (4:16)

Yeah, that's what I need. More medical. More fake gay medical diseases to identify with.

Host 1 (4:22)

We need another disease name for it so that people take it seriously. This is the same thing for. I'll say it. Adulting.

Host 2 (4:27)

Mm.

Host 1 (4:27)

It's like, of course we know it's a horrible word, but you needed a phrase for when you've done something that feels like that.

Host 2 (4:33)

It's true, it's true. It's true.

Host 1 (4:37)

Please.

Host 2 (4:37)

And please welcome yesterday.

Host 1 (4:39)

Okay.

Guest/Host 3 (4:39)

Hey, everybody. I just. I can no longer be a passive.

Host 2 (4:43)

I think you had a full. Yeah, 10 minute normal conversation, then we were like. And now shut up.

Host 1 (4:49)

Yeah, that's tough.

Guest/Host 3 (4:50)

Well, here's my thing with adulting. Please let me set up for this. Yeah, I don't like. The reason I don't like it is because it is literally rebranding the word responsibility. That's all it is. It is genuinely just a thing you have to do that you don't that. That is what responsibility is. You know, anytime someone's like, oh, I'm adulting. I got the cat to the vet. I'm like, yeah, you're supposed to take a cat to the vet. Like, you know what I mean? Like, it's never, like, to me at least, it's never just like, oh, I was adulting, and I, like, bought this shirt, but I wore these pants. Can you believe? You know what I mean?

Host 2 (5:27)

It's never. Yeah, it's never. I signed a mortgage. Right, exactly. Because the people who are actually signing mortgages are, like, that's not how they view the world.

Guest/Host 3 (5:36)

Right?

Host 1 (5:37)

Sure, sure.

Guest/Host 3 (5:37)

Exactly. Exactly. It's really. It really annoys because you're trying to. And I think this is. I'm much older than you guys. I'm the oldest person who's ever lived. But congratulations.

Host 2 (5:48)

I saw that you reached that milestone last week.

Guest/Host 3 (5:50)

People were trying to kill me, and I'm like, no, give me three more days. Um, but it's. It is very much a, like, late millennial problem.

Host 1 (5:59)

Of course. Of course.

Guest/Host 3 (6:01)

Could you believe that?

Host 1 (6:02)

I.

Guest/Host 3 (6:02)

And it's like, yes, I actually. Not only can I believe it, it is 100% something you were supposed to do three and a half years ago.

Host 2 (6:11)

What also really betrays, like, what. Sorry, God, what kind of lifestyle people grew up with. Like, okay, so did you, like, never do laundry before?

Guest/Host 3 (6:18)

Right, but that's. It's exactly that. Like, it in my core makes me so sick in the same, like, Sunday scaries. Look, I. Maybe I'm aging myself. Hold on, hold on. Like, Sunday scaries, weirdly, I'm okay with. Because it transcends whether you're employed or not. And I'd actually argue when you're unemployed, Sunday scaries, you're like, it does feel like someone's gonna come into my house and kill me. Or. I prefer that because then I wouldn't have to find a job tomorrow.

Host 2 (6:52)

Yeah, because you're also least being employed. You have an innate sense of community. You have, like, you're going into the office and everyone else. Yes, we all hate this. Someone is making some, like, dark joke that's like, ugh, yikes. Mondays. I almost killed myself this morning.

Guest/Host 3 (7:05)

You're like, that's classic Carol. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you wake up. You wake up on a Monday morning with no job, and you're like, oh, yeah.

Host 1 (7:14)

Oh, I felt a pressure this morning to turn it all around, to be like, I need to change my life.

Guest/Host 3 (7:19)

Yeah, that's what.

Host 1 (7:20)

That's what the Sunday after Holiday was making me feel.

Host 2 (7:23)

Yeah, no, for sure.

Host 1 (7:24)

Also, I was talking to a dear friend yesterday and I was like, I'm stressed because, you know, the holidays are ending. And he said, why does it matter? You're unemployed. Can you.

Host 2 (7:32)

That's. Can you believe the rudest things I've been.

Host 1 (7:34)

First of all, I have a podcast.

Guest/Host 3 (7:36)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I would argue that is an enemy. That is not a friend.

Host 1 (7:41)

No. It was one of the rudest things anyone's ever said.

Host 2 (7:43)

Yeah.

Host 1 (7:43)

Meanwhile, he's also unemployed.

Host 2 (7:45)

Also, that's not what we're. Specifically, we have to believe that we are not following the employed unemployed binary in our line of work.

Guest/Host 3 (7:53)

Like, I can't.

Host 2 (7:54)

If what I'm doing now counts as unemployed. I've been unemployed my whole life.

Guest/Host 3 (7:57)

Yes.

Host 2 (7:58)

Like, I can't be thinking.

Host 1 (7:59)

It's called mixed employment. This is what I'm trying to make happen. The term mixed employment.

Guest/Host 3 (8:03)

Yeah. We're all. Look, we all live in. Even. Even if you go to an office nine to five each day, that's gig economy.

Host 1 (8:13)

You're only two years. That's how jobs work now.

Guest/Host 3 (8:17)

Yeah.

Host 1 (8:17)

You don't work anywhere for 30 years.

Guest/Host 3 (8:19)

Yeah, yeah. God. What if we all just hear me out. We finish this podcast and we all go work in a factory for the.

Host 1 (8:26)

Rest of our lives.

Guest/Host 3 (8:27)

Can you imagine?

Host 2 (8:28)

Just think what factory would have.

Guest/Host 3 (8:30)

Making bottles.

Host 2 (8:31)

Making bottles.

Guest/Host 3 (8:32)

Yeah. People think. Think about.

Host 2 (8:34)

I would find a way to die 48 hours in.

Ad Voice 2 (8:37)

Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (8:37)

But think about that. Think how would you would die. Think about how great that would be.

Host 2 (8:41)

I mean, at least I would die in the line of duty.

Guest/Host 3 (8:43)

Right? Exactly.

Host 1 (8:44)

If I had a few missing fingers from the factory, that would be kind of tough. People would like that.

Guest/Host 3 (8:49)

Come on. Like, I would.

Host 2 (8:50)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (8:51)

Nothing makes you more patriotic than getting hurt in a factory. It's more patriotic than going to war, in my opinion.

Host 1 (8:58)

Literally true.

Guest/Host 3 (8:59)

Yeah. Yeah.

Host 1 (8:59)

Wow.

Guest/Host 3 (9:00)

Because anyone can go to war. Like, who?

Host 2 (9:01)

Duh.

Guest/Host 3 (9:02)

You know.

Host 2 (9:05)

By design. And everyone loves you.

Guest/Host 3 (9:06)

You don't.

Host 1 (9:07)

The streets, you board the plane early. That's never. That's never sat right with me.

Host 2 (9:12)

It's actually the most effective way to get health care is to first become a war veteran and then come back and be able to get it through the day.

Host 1 (9:18)

Of course, it's.

Host 2 (9:20)

That's a hack that you guys can take back home.

Host 1 (9:21)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (9:22)

Yeah. Hey, all you podcasts in the military.

Host 2 (9:25)

Yeah. Everyone of mixed employment take one year, go to Iraq, come back.

Guest/Host 3 (9:30)

Do we think? Do we think? Hear me out. It is. I don't know. When the Actual when? I don't know when this actually drops, but yeah, if you're a soldier right now, listening to this in Venezuela, how's it going? We should be asking, hey, how's it going?

Host 1 (9:43)

How's it going?

Host 2 (9:44)

I do wonder at this point, like, a week from today, what it will look like over there.

Guest/Host 3 (9:48)

Yeah.

Host 2 (9:49)

And just for everyone listening, we are recording them again the Monday after the holidays. So this is January 1st.

Host 1 (9:53)

So whatever horrific things have happened in the week from January 4th to January 11th, roughly, we don't know them.

Host 2 (10:00)

Do you feel like you saw a disproportionate amount of, like, derpy posting about Venezuela? Like, of people being like, okay, I guess there's another war now? I'm like, I was sort of shocked by the amount of that I saw. I was like, wait a minute, you guys. We're like, yeah, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (10:17)

We're always at war.

Host 2 (10:19)

It's also like, that's not what we're doing here.

Guest/Host 3 (10:21)

Yeah, yeah. I don't know if I. It's. It's more that I just saw the same meme over and over again where it's like, it's 1988 and there was a war for oil. It's 2001. There's a war for. It's 2020. And I'm like, yeah, but like, this is all the same one.

Host 1 (10:39)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (10:39)

You know what I'm saying? It's like, we're, you know. And I'm not trying to be, like, cute here. It's like we're breaking up a story into chapters. We're not telling new stories. We're not telling new stories.

Host 1 (10:49)

There's no new stories anymore. There's no new stories anymore.

Host 2 (10:55)

There is this obsession with being with. Like, everyone always thinks they've discovered the US's loss of innocence.

Guest/Host 3 (11:00)

Like, it's like, this is.

Host 2 (11:02)

And finally they've gone too far.

Guest/Host 3 (11:03)

It's like, read a book. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 1 (11:06)

Well, then there's the other one where it's like, actually, I've always known that America is bad.

Guest/Host 3 (11:09)

It's like, okay, yeah, because that one annoys me too, where they're like, you know, every piece of information we all get now is just from a meme. And we go like, interesting, but, like, you know, people being like. And I never. For the Pledge of Allegiance. And it's like, that's a lie. Because we would get in trouble. You know what I'm saying? It's like, look, look, we all got older and like, yes. No, we're like, this sucks. But, like, this Thing where it's just like, okay. And also, let's say it is 100% true that you did not stand for the Pledge of Allegiance. It wasn't because you were like, I understand the military industrial complex in third grade in Ms. Harper's class. Like, you're just a bad kid. That is fin.

Host 2 (11:57)

Fine.

Guest/Host 3 (11:57)

Like, it was also, by the way, very funny when a bad kid would do something like that. You weren't doing it with the consciousness of, like, you know what? I think that maybe the CIA is doing some pretty terrible things.

Host 2 (12:12)

I think you're, like, really putting your finger on something which is, like, a lot of people later rebrand their complete, like, incompetence in, like, school and work as, like, politically radical. This sucks. And. And I think that everyone who does that thinks they're getting away with it.

Guest/Host 3 (12:28)

They, like.

Host 2 (12:28)

They're like, oh, perfect.

Guest/Host 3 (12:29)

I found the right. Yeah, right, right.

Host 2 (12:31)

I found the right lens through which to view, like, the last 20 years of my life, and I come out the hero.

Guest/Host 3 (12:35)

It's kind of incredible.

Host 2 (12:36)

And you're like, no, I see what you're doing.

Guest/Host 3 (12:39)

It's like this new thing where people are like, I'm not gonna pay my taxes. And it's just like. Right, so you are. Yeah. First of all, you weren't to begin with, or you are like.

Host 1 (12:51)

You know what I'm saying?

Guest/Host 3 (12:51)

There's this idea of, like. Like, I'm a political rat, and it's like, there is no way. And I. And I am. I, like, keep in mind, I used to drive a Prius, but there is no way that you have a Prius, and you're like, I'm a political radical, not gonna pay their taxes. It is. You do not have the soul for it. You know what I mean? The soul that got you into a Toyota dealership and chose a Prius over, you know, a Yaris. Like, even a Yaris, I would argue it's just very.

Host 1 (13:24)

Yaris is punk. Of course.

Guest/Host 3 (13:28)

People are like, this sucks. And you're like, no, it doesn't. Like, I argue with. That is a harder. That is a harder life to live.

Host 2 (13:36)

So what is your Prius?

Guest/Host 3 (13:38)

Oh, my God.

Host 2 (13:38)

Having a Yaris in America is more difficult than living in Venezuela right now.

Guest/Host 3 (13:43)

You know what? You know what? I don't just support that. I support it 200%.

Host 1 (13:49)

That's an amazing. That's an amazing thing to say on Mike and on camera.

Guest/Host 3 (13:54)

Yeah.

Host 2 (13:55)

I don't want to know where. What kind of world this episode will be. Sort of.

Guest/Host 3 (14:00)

I would. I would Argue.

Host 1 (14:01)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (14:01)

Having a Yaris, driving a Yaris, you know, because first of all, they're not really making Yaris's like that anymore. So it's like you're going out of your way. You gotta find the right mechanic. Oh, God. Like, am I getting OEM parts? Like, there's. There's a lot of stuff happening that. That is harder than this week. As we all know, getting deployed and being sent to Venezuela for the oil.

Host 2 (14:25)

At least when you're deployed, you're participating in a tradition that has existed for generations. A Yaris, that's just sort of something in the public imagination that's not even a real car.

Host 1 (14:37)

It's not a pathway that is clear. No one knows what that means.

Guest/Host 3 (14:40)

Exactly.

Host 2 (14:42)

I would argue.

Guest/Host 3 (14:42)

I would argue, argue that if you're being deployed, you're getting on a plane.

Host 2 (14:46)

Right, Right.

Host 1 (14:47)

Let's start there.

Host 2 (14:47)

That's better.

Guest/Host 3 (14:48)

Yes. Than being in a Yaris. So I think we've kind of settled this one. And.

Host 2 (14:54)

And so when I pledge allegiance to the flag, I am pledging allegiance to the Yaris drivers. I'm not pledging allegiance to whoever we're sending to all these countries to stabilize it. The Yaris drivers are the. They're the ones going to the bottle factory, losing fingers, coming back. Meanwhile, the butterfly bottle factory doesn't even exist. Everything in their life is a lie.

Guest/Host 3 (15:11)

Yeah.

Ad Voice 2 (15:11)

Yeah.

Host 1 (15:12)

I just wish when I paid taxes, all that money would go to the Yari drivers.

Host 2 (15:15)

Yes, that's what I wish.

Guest/Host 3 (15:19)

They, you know what? A stimulus.

Host 1 (15:20)

We need a Yara stimulus.

Guest/Host 3 (15:22)

Yeah. To really get this country back on track.

Host 1 (15:25)

So did you guys do like a year end dump or what?

Guest/Host 3 (15:27)

What the hell?

Host 1 (15:29)

Just wonder if you guys did a year end dump.

Host 2 (15:31)

Did you do a year end dump?

Host 1 (15:32)

Did you do a year end dump?

Host 2 (15:35)

Can I. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (15:37)

Did you do the pictures? Hey, brothers. Do you mean the pictures or Instagram?

Host 1 (15:42)

Did you do a year end dump?

Guest/Host 3 (15:45)

Look, we were kind of talking about this before it all started, but I find myself more a viewer of Instagram than someone who participates now. And so, like. And also, again, being deathly unemployed, I'm like, you ever seen my dogs? That's the job. You see, that's my wife. That's my dogs. Like, that's.

Host 1 (16:05)

You have mixed employment.

Host 2 (16:07)

Yeah, but I don't. I think of you. And again, we met today.

Guest/Host 3 (16:10)

Yeah.

Host 2 (16:11)

I think of you from afar.

Guest/Host 3 (16:12)

I've been a fan and listener.

Host 2 (16:15)

Oh, stop.

Guest/Host 3 (16:16)

Guys are so. And I like.

Host 1 (16:17)

Oh, and this is why you have such a stellar reputation.

Guest/Host 3 (16:19)

No, no, no. I. I like. And I'm. I, you know, maybe out myself a little bit. I like, actively, anytime someone's like, here's a podcast. Like, you know what? I want you to go in that closet. There's a gun in there.

Host 2 (16:34)

Go into the Yaris windows, all the way up.

Host 1 (16:37)

Just drive as fast as you can.

Guest/Host 3 (16:38)

To the Yaris yourself. But I. I started seeing clips of Yalls, just like, algorithm stuff, and every single thing made me laugh so hard. So incredibly funny.

Host 2 (16:50)

And.

Guest/Host 3 (16:50)

And just. Just let me. Just let me say this. And you can edit it out if you want, but I think that, like, especially right now, it's very easy to be cynical or typical, and I find that you guys always manage so when it feels like you're about to go that way, circumvent it. And I find you guys to be very, wholly original and very funny. And anyway, what the hell. Yeah, anyway, so I. I say, like, so I'm a very glad to be here. And secondly, this will. Being on this will be like my first Instagram post of 2020.

Host 1 (17:22)

Well, that's huge. That is huge.

Host 2 (17:25)

Wow. Well, okay, now I feel bad saying what I was about to say. It's complimentary to you, but it's sort of aggressive because you. We're talking about being an employee. I think of you as someone who, like, every. It's like you're silent, silent, silent, silent. And then every six months, you're like, like, by the way, I wrote the new Jurassic Park.

Guest/Host 3 (17:49)

You know what? I. I wish that were true. But it's. It's truly. I think people read into things too much, and they're just like, oh, oh, no. If I look, if I went one slide to the right, it's just like, he just likes dinosaurs. He just got really into dinosaurs.

Host 1 (18:04)

So that's where it gets complicated.

Host 2 (18:09)

Well, then whatever you're doing, it's. It's working on me. I'm like, this is a guy who has figured out Hollywood. I'm like, how did he do it?

Guest/Host 3 (18:16)

God, I. You know, I. You know, my credit card companies might disagree with you.

Host 2 (18:21)

Interesting.

Guest/Host 3 (18:21)

All right, let's get them disagree with you.

Host 2 (18:23)

Yeah, let's get the Yaris dealership on the phone.

Guest/Host 3 (18:25)

Just start screaming, they're, please pay us. No, I think that, you know, and I would argue that, like, do we know Brandon Wardell? Yeah, we know a Brandon Wardell. I was speaking with him not too long ago, and we're talking about how, like, the thing that's interesting about Instagram is that it used to be the idea that you were flexing by posting on there. And the post was about the flex in real life, but now the flex actually just ends at the post. Now, like, if you are someone who, for the sake of argument, if you guys are like, hey, you know, we've taken the show to blah, blah, blah, or we're going on tour or whatever, it's. People don't even care that you're actually going on tour. They just. I just like the idea that you flexed about going on tour. We live in a very weird post posting world.

Host 2 (19:15)

Completely.

Host 1 (19:16)

Well, this thing happens sometimes. I've seen people promote shows that never happen.

Guest/Host 3 (19:20)

Right, exactly.

Host 1 (19:22)

But the poster looks amazing and it's like, date coming soon. And it's like we're starting this big live show and it's like it never comes.

Host 2 (19:29)

Okay, one time in New York, this was maybe four years ago, I was booked on a standup show. Just sort of like normal middle class stamina. Yaris is as far as the eye can see. It was at the venue, tethered on post or whatever. I show up to the venue, I kid you not. Neither host shows up and audience doesn't show up. I text the one host, she doesn't get back to me. I text the other one, he's like, yeah, we're both running late, but be there soon. Fully 45 minutes pass. No hosts, no audience. I have confirmed this was the show I was booked on and they are allegedly on their way. And so I left. Never heard from either of them again. No apology, no like, we'll book you on the next one. I was like, this is like a new way of living, like you guys like. And I'm not exaggerating any part of the story. Like, they booked me on the show. I showed up exactly where I was supposed to. There was no show. And they both sort of like soft lied, I guess, about being on their way.

Guest/Host 3 (20:31)

Did.

Host 2 (20:32)

And then we all moved on with our lives.

Host 1 (20:34)

That's amazing.

Guest/Host 3 (20:35)

Do these people still perform or are they still around? See, I would have loved a little bit more if they just like you. Literally, they quit that day.

Host 2 (20:43)

They never exist.

Host 1 (20:44)

And they went to a factory.

Guest/Host 3 (20:45)

But you know what? It is funnier. It's actually funnier that they pranked you. It's crazy.

Host 1 (20:50)

They are the only one that showed up.

Host 2 (20:52)

I showed up. And this other guy who, you know showed up, I'll say that. And then, please, it was, you don't know, like, truly, like, I don't think I've seen him since then. Like someone who I.

Host 1 (21:03)

He disappeared after that was seen with.

Host 2 (21:04)

Like, a specific era of New York when we would, like, see him more. But anyway. But I was really shocked, and I'm sorry to sort of say this on air. He stayed like, I left after 40 minutes, and he was like, I'm gonna wait a little longer. Like, I'm here. I might as well wait. And I'm like, there is no audience.

Guest/Host 3 (21:21)

Yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (21:21)

Like, the host will come and then you will do one of those, like, shows that's in front of two people.

Guest/Host 3 (21:25)

But wait, can I ask. I. There's. I have a question. Yeah, it was you. Were you, like, tagged and like.

Host 2 (21:32)

Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (21:32)

Okay, so here's my question. And because the problem is you.

Host 1 (21:38)

How.

Guest/Host 3 (21:40)

How did they get the word out to the audience not to, like.

Host 2 (21:45)

No, I just think it was like, it was one of shows at a bar that, like. Yeah, they just, like, no one came. You know, like, there are.

Host 1 (21:53)

Well, you almost, you know, remember when.

Host 2 (21:54)

You people used to cancel shows?

Guest/Host 3 (21:56)

Like, yes.

Host 1 (21:57)

There needs to be, like, you have to, like, clear with the host. Like, is this real, like. Or are we just doing an Instagram thing?

Guest/Host 3 (22:02)

Right.

Host 1 (22:02)

Because I definitely show up to shows before where even there was no audience, but they still, like, make you perform and, like, take video of you and, like, do a boomerang.

Guest/Host 3 (22:10)

Yeah. Yeah.

Host 1 (22:10)

And I'm like, this is humiliating and insane. Like, I'm literally like, I need to call a mental health professional because what's.

Guest/Host 3 (22:16)

Going on here is ready. The performing in and of itself is already pretend. Yeah. So it's like you're pretending to pretend. It's really just like, I wish someone would.

Host 2 (22:27)

Best case scenario. Like, best case scenario of, like, a show like that. And I'm not talking about a show in a theater. I'm talking about, like, a bar show. Best case scenario, you perform in front of, like, 20 people and it's like, a good show in the sense that, like, people laugh and everyone has a good time. Whatever. That's still, like, the scene in the movie where someone, like, sees the local flavor of a small town. That's not you making it in Hollywood, ass.

Guest/Host 3 (22:49)

No, absolutely. I. But it. I do. I just. It's very Twilight Zone. It's crazy. No, like, no one would.

Ad Voice 2 (22:56)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (22:56)

I mean, here's the thing. I guess it's not completely your fault, because the homie. Big Dog.

Ad Voice 3 (23:03)

Big Dog.

Guest/Host 3 (23:05)

He was in the building.

Host 1 (23:06)

He was in the building.

Guest/Host 3 (23:08)

It feels very hook where they're, like, imagining dinner. Yes.

Host 2 (23:13)

Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (23:13)

Like, maybe you could see.

Host 1 (23:16)

It's like being in your bedroom and being like, this is what it would be like to perform.

Host 2 (23:19)

Yeah, totally.

Host 1 (23:20)

Well, all that is to say is that I want to post well, okay.

Host 2 (23:24)

So Sam has this thing where every time he posts, he feels like he's breaking his silence.

Host 1 (23:28)

I. Because it's just. I go months without posting, and then I'm like, but now I really want to. And I can feel it. Everyone else is posting. I'm like, I've got a good one in me. I know it. But I'm like, but every time I go to look at my photos, I'm.

Host 2 (23:41)

Like, oh, God, you should do an impression of banana bread.

Guest/Host 3 (23:45)

Come on. Come on. The fact that even I get that is wild.

Host 2 (23:57)

I keep saying that as a joke, implying that I, like, have some animosity towards Jordan. I just think it's a funny thing. It's objectively funny to be like, okay, my first big video impression of an animal. That's so funny.

Host 1 (24:12)

Yeah, that is funny.

Host 2 (24:14)

And I think you would agree that it's funny.

Host 1 (24:16)

It's funny.

Host 2 (24:17)

But it is. It's also such a sign of the times. Like, imagine now being like, all right, I'm gonna do a portion of banana bread.

Guest/Host 3 (24:23)

Yeah. People would. I think you would get taken out. Someone would find some reason to be like, actually, a banana republic was this. And then a banana, you know?

Host 2 (24:34)

No, I think we're past that, though. I feel like. Don't you think that we're like, people have given up on canceling.

Host 1 (24:39)

People have given up on canceling in a big way.

Host 2 (24:41)

In a big way.

Guest/Host 3 (24:42)

Yeah.

Host 2 (24:43)

100%.

Guest/Host 3 (24:44)

You guys, I've got some words that I want to.

Host 1 (24:48)

You have to. You have, like, two drafts.

Guest/Host 3 (24:49)

You have, like, two weeks. But, okay, but see, I think when you say that, I think we're in, you know, say this in company of what I'm assuming calling things gay is what probably what you're pointing to. And then using the word. Using the R word.

Host 2 (25:04)

Yes, But I think more than that, like, in more substantial and kind of, like, harmful. Like, for example, I'll give you, like, a very simple thing. I think people used to go out of their way. Like white people used to go out of their way if they were curating a comedy lineup to make it, quote, unquote, diverse. I, like, don't think that's happening anymore. Like, I just think no one's, like, reading through the names, being like, oh, and okay. Like, no. Literally no one.

Guest/Host 3 (25:28)

Right, right.

Host 2 (25:28)

I think things like that. That actually, sadly, are more like, I'm not. I don't want to say impactful because it is ultimately a comedy show no one's gonna come to, but slightly more, you know, real than, like, word use or language use. I really think that somehow there's something where, like. Like, the second Trump was elected for the second time, people were like, you know what?

Guest/Host 3 (25:49)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (25:50)

I was tired.

Guest/Host 3 (25:51)

Yeah, yeah.

Host 1 (25:52)

People are leaning in.

Guest/Host 3 (25:53)

In a weird way, but I think, you know, I don't know. I really feel like it's a return to form. Like, I think that, like, you know, pre. You know, I would even say Trayvon Martin. It was. It was. That's what it was. Oh, completely. And then, like, you know, by the way, like, this is coming from someone who, like, worked on Girls, and like, they, like. I remember, like, when they. Thank you for bringing them.

Host 2 (26:14)

Thank you for bringing them, because it's.

Guest/Host 3 (26:16)

All we want to talk about.

Host 2 (26:19)

I literally told that. I was like, how are we. How are we gonna bring up girls? You know, it's all being, like, rude.

Host 1 (26:24)

In a conversation about race and being like, let's talk about girls.

Guest/Host 3 (26:28)

But I mean, like, you know, like, in season two, they had, like, Donald Glover. And then, like, I started working on it in later seasons, but, you know, Jessica Williams is on it. There was like. And I remember at that time, I'm a black person. I was like, they are going out of their way to get black people. You know what I mean? And so, like, now that we're kind of back in that again, I'm like.

Host 2 (26:50)

No, we're back to season one of Girls. Yes, I'm certainly right.

Guest/Host 3 (26:52)

Oh, I. I heard this song. Song before, completely.

Host 2 (26:56)

No, you're totally right. That it's a return to form.

Guest/Host 3 (26:58)

So I guess it doesn't. I don't know. I guess it's not as jarring in the way that I'm like, oh, okay, let me go grab my top hat. I'm just Start singing. But. But anyway, so. But I. O. So I agree with that. But the canceling part is in particular.

Host 1 (27:16)

Sure, sure.

Host 2 (27:17)

You think that's still alive? You think the spirit of cancel.

Guest/Host 3 (27:20)

You know, I think I agree with you guys in the sense that I feel like the voices trying to cancel have gotten louder, but nothing is ultimate.

Host 2 (27:29)

Exactly.

Guest/Host 3 (27:29)

Happening.

Host 2 (27:29)

Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (27:30)

Like, there's definitely much more, like, can you believe? And then, like, nothing. And also, I'm like. I guess, like. And I'm not. Look, I. Last person on earth who wants to be, like, in politics. And I'm not saying that in a political sense, just that it's what we're all talking about. All the time. But I will say, how do you cancel anyone when quite literally the leader of the country is like, bad sex with a kid?

Host 1 (27:51)

Totally. Totally. I mean, it is impossible. I mean, even, like, in comedy, it's like the. The right wing comedy is, like, so huge, but it's like, what are you gonna do? Like, we can't be, like, you can't cancel, like, someone who's, like, liberal and has, like, an off color thought from 2012 or something.

Host 2 (28:08)

I also think people realize you can ignore everything. Like, there was a point when, like, the, you know, CEO of whatever. Peacock was like, oh, my God, it has been brought to my desk.

Ad Voice 2 (28:19)

Right.

Host 2 (28:21)

Well, we have to call a meeting about it. And now they're just like, yeah, that doesn't matter.

Guest/Host 3 (28:25)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, like that.

Host 2 (28:26)

Fully, as a matter of fact. Yeah, exactly.

Guest/Host 3 (28:30)

Okay, I'm sorry.

Host 1 (28:31)

It's definitely the people trying to still cancel. Like, they have definitely been painted to be insane now. I know it's in a way that is like. Like, I'm sorry. Like, I don't know what to do.

Host 2 (28:41)

It's sad because they are. It's like the people making, quote, unquote, valid critiques are just grouped in totally literal psychopaths. Yeah. That are, like, calling a pop star fascist. You know what I mean?

Guest/Host 3 (28:55)

Yeah. It's very, like. And I. It's. It's old hat at this point, but it's like to. It's all very, like. Like, the Sydney Sweeney jeans thing really was to me, Like, I was like, look, even if it was fully about eugenics, let's say that they got into the room, they're like, we want to make a commercial about eugenics. And, like, from top to bottom, that's what the purpose of the commercial was. I was still just like, I can't. This. This cannot be. This cannot be the online fight. And it. And it really was so. It's. It's. It's. It's interesting in the way that you guys are presenting it. I'm like, oh, yeah, I guess, like, because again, ultimately, I did. Pardon me, Jesus. Like, I'm, like, spitting like strippers. I did. Ultimately, you know, after all that, I went to go see the housemaid, and I was like, she's great, and this movie's entertaining.

Host 2 (29:43)

Amanda Seyfried is great.

Guest/Host 3 (29:45)

Sydney's okay. No, but I would argue. I would argue that it's exactly the pocket she needed to be in completely, you know? Sure, sure, sure. It was kind of like, I'm here and this dude clearly wants to bang me. I have to pretend he doesn't. And then he locks me in a room. And I'm kind of surprised by that. That's exactly the three steps that I wanted to. The man at Safe Read's having the time of her life.

Host 2 (30:10)

She's best actress. Generational talent. I was like, thank God she's here. Thank God someone is awake in this movie.

Guest/Host 3 (30:18)

Cuz she was like, I don't care.

Host 2 (30:19)

What anyone else is doing. I'm literally going, Gina Rowland.

Guest/Host 3 (30:22)

Yes, exactly. Yes. I have a cartoon and you guys are.

Host 1 (30:27)

When will she actually get respect?

Host 2 (30:28)

Amanda Seyfried. Yes, I know, it's crazy.

Guest/Host 3 (30:34)

As I'm like, I'm unemployed. I worked on a thing very recently.

Host 1 (30:37)

It's called Jurassic Park.

Guest/Host 3 (30:39)

Yeah, it's called Jurassic Park. But seeing it was at an award show and seeing the way people of her peers talk to her, I'm like.

Host 2 (30:48)

Oh, they all, they love her.

Guest/Host 3 (30:51)

It's just like for whatever reason, the public is still just like the chick from Mean Girls. And you're like, damn it. So like, you were so good in that. That like people watch the Testament of Anne Lee and they're just like, I wish you were like in Mean Girls.

Host 2 (31:04)

I think what's happening to her is sort of what happened with Kirsten Dunst for a very long time where like, despite all the good work she was doing, people kept being like, from Spider Man.

Guest/Host 3 (31:12)

Right, Exactly.

Host 2 (31:13)

Then the dam broke and now she's respected.

Guest/Host 3 (31:16)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's respected. She's like, it's that, it's that like she still has to do the thing that the public is like, whoa. Cuz we all, you know, we're all industry inside.

Host 1 (31:27)

Oh, we're so deep.

Host 2 (31:28)

Unemployed is industry.

Guest/Host 3 (31:30)

You know, we get the deadline emails. But I, I do think like people like us, like, you know, it's the same thing where it's like, you know, artists understand artists and then it still takes the public a little bit. You know, it's, it's what I hate the term, but like a comics comic.

Host 2 (31:47)

Yeah, Amanda's a comics comic.

Host 1 (31:50)

An actress.

Guest/Host 3 (31:52)

Yeah.

Host 1 (31:52)

I just feel bad for her because I know she's doing. I think, I feel bad for her because I think she deserves so much more. And it's not fair, it's not fair that she just puts her, she does amazing work all the time and yet get no respect.

Host 2 (32:07)

She gets, I do think she gets respect, but I, but I see what you're saying. It's like, it's again, it's like a Kirsten Dunst Thing, like, but, but I think that, I think it's going to happen for her.

Host 1 (32:18)

I hope so.

Guest/Host 3 (32:18)

I, you know, I, I, I argue that it's going to be the Housemate. I think that it will be.

Host 2 (32:23)

It's doing great in the box office.

Guest/Host 3 (32:24)

It's doing great at the box office. And, like, people be like, oh, she's like, nuts. Let me go look at the other stuff. And then they'll watch. I don't know what they. It Long river or whatever, that she's a cop.

Host 2 (32:34)

Well, she was great in that Elizabeth. I mean, she got recognition for that Elizabeth Holmes show where she was true. She got awards.

Host 1 (32:40)

Okay, I have a. Is it, is it that the name is confusing to say?

Host 2 (32:44)

Which one?

Host 1 (32:45)

Ann Lee Amanda Seyfried. Oh, is that the, Is that the issue?

Guest/Host 3 (32:48)

Yeah. What? Because what did I say?

Host 2 (32:51)

Is it? I actually, none of us know Hoax.

Host 1 (32:52)

And people have yelled at us before.

Guest/Host 3 (32:54)

Seyfried, Seyfried, Seyfried. Yeah, I've heard Seyfried before.

Host 1 (32:57)

I think this is what's stopping everyone from respecting her fully, but I'm not.

Host 2 (33:01)

Because if someone's like, Sydney Sweet Sweeney rolls off the top, suddenly I'm buying the jeans. Eugenics, I guess. I hadn't thought about it.

Guest/Host 3 (33:09)

Did you see the Housemate? Or no.

Host 1 (33:10)

No.

Host 2 (33:10)

Oh, sorry. We just spoiled it for you. But guess what? You see it coming from a Milo. Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (33:16)

There's absolutely nothing to spoil, which is very nice. Like, it was, it's, I don't know, like, to me, it was a very first of all, 2025, great year for movies, in my opinion. But it felt like, like I didn't know Paul Feig directed it, by the way. So I watched it, and as I was watching it, I was like, this is like, something Paul Feig wish he was doing. Wishes he was doing. I sincerely said that to my wife as we were watching it, and she was like, okay, like, thinking I'm, like, making a joke. And then the credits rolled. I was like, paul Feigor. And she was like, what is the matter with you? I love that it is. So here's the thing. It is a movie for the sake of being a movie. That's what I like about it. You're not like, like, they're not being like, oh, this is actually a metaphor for grief.

Host 2 (34:03)

That's actually true. Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (34:04)

Yeah.

Host 2 (34:05)

Even the, like, feminism of it, it's sort of like, sure, right.

Guest/Host 3 (34:08)

Exactly. Like, you should, you should check it out.

Host 1 (34:11)

I'm going to watch it.

Guest/Host 3 (34:12)

I want you to take your last $17. And I want you to go to the movie that I want you to see the house.

Host 2 (34:18)

You know, I actually think, speaking of Paul Feig and I think this, like, relates to the topics we like to discuss here. I actually think sort of faggy straight guys.

Guest/Host 3 (34:27)

Yeah.

Host 2 (34:27)

Keep the world running in, like a really severe, both in good and bad ways. Because Donald Trump is also one.

Guest/Host 3 (34:33)

Yes.

Host 2 (34:34)

I sort of think that's like, it's like they're the invisible architecture of politics and the arts.

Guest/Host 3 (34:40)

That is.

Host 2 (34:40)

You know what I mean? This is interesting, but Baz Luhrmann, like, I mean.

Guest/Host 3 (34:46)

I was gonna say, here's my issue. Is that like, you know, I won't use that term.

Host 2 (34:51)

Okay. Like, you can say gay seeming straight.

Guest/Host 3 (34:54)

I love. By the way, I'm so glad that it's so long to say, but gay seeming straight guys, it's the issues that the percentage of them like, that are closeted. Yeah. Yeah. So you're like, it is actually just gay guys. I would argue being closeted is what makes them work so hard.

Host 2 (35:14)

That's definitely also.

Guest/Host 3 (35:15)

Yeah. You know, like, sleep with one eye open. Right? Exactly. Yeah. Which is like, like, hey, man, I either need to, like, create a new technology or people are going to find out I'm gay. So I'm going to do the technology thing.

Host 1 (35:28)

No, there's. Being in the closet is like, you know, it's like having military training or something. Yes, it is.

Host 2 (35:35)

Because you have to, like, shut down your feelings. You have to always be like, performing.

Host 1 (35:39)

You are like, viewing every social interaction as like a math problem and not as like an actual authentic thing.

Guest/Host 3 (35:45)

Wow.

Host 2 (35:45)

Being closeted really is like being in the military.

Host 1 (35:48)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (35:48)

Some would say harder.

Host 1 (35:49)

Someone say harder. I mean, I would say, would you.

Guest/Host 3 (35:51)

Rather be closeted or in Venezuela?

Host 1 (35:54)

Okay. I think the hardest is Venezuela. I think the hardest is closeted. Then Yaris owner, then Venezuela.

Guest/Host 3 (36:02)

Okay. Wow.

Host 2 (36:04)

Wow.

Guest/Host 3 (36:04)

Okay.

Host 1 (36:04)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (36:05)

Yeah. I. Look, I want to. I want to argue it, but I'm like, that's a pretty. That's a strong power ranking.

Host 2 (36:11)

Should we do segments or.

Host 1 (36:13)

No, we should literally do our first segment.

Host 2 (36:14)

Should we just do it?

Host 1 (36:15)

I think we should.

Host 2 (36:15)

Okay. Cuz I want to talk about. Well, a. I want to bring. I want to talk about your topic and I literally want to talk about girls for 90 minutes.

Guest/Host 3 (36:22)

Well, yeah, we. Look, we'll just read my topic and then we'll talk about.

Host 1 (36:27)

It's so funny. We haven't recorded in so long. I'm like, what are the rhythms?

Host 2 (36:30)

It's been. You're really catching up. I just landed in la, like, oh, it's. Anything could happen.

Host 1 (36:36)

We're completely reckless right now.

Guest/Host 3 (36:38)

I mean like we're like, are we all raising cane?

Host 1 (36:41)

Yeah, literally.

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Guest/Host 3 (36:51)

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Host 1 (38:46)

So our first segment is called Straight Shooters. And in this segment we're going to ask you a series of rapid fire questions that's basically this thing or this other thing to gauge your familiarity with and complicity in straight culture. Kick us off.

Host 2 (38:59)

Inviting the evil eye or having a bad knee?

Guest/Host 3 (39:04)

Wait Sorry, which one am I choosing?

Host 1 (39:06)

And so the only rule is you can't ask any follow up questions or it'll scream at you.

Guest/Host 3 (39:09)

Okay, ask the question again. Wow.

Host 2 (39:12)

Inviting the evil eye or having a bad knee?

Guest/Host 3 (39:17)

Bad knee.

Host 1 (39:18)

Okay, New Year's resolutions or two beers being the solution.

Host 2 (39:23)

Oh, that's good.

Guest/Host 3 (39:25)

I'm gonna go. New Year's resolutions.

Host 2 (39:27)

Driving a red Corvette or arriving with Will Arnold.

Host 1 (39:30)

Net Corvette, PepsiT, AC or Apple TV.

Guest/Host 3 (39:35)

Apple TV.

Host 2 (39:36)

Ohpa. Gangnam Style or. Oh, he's a pedophile.

Guest/Host 3 (39:39)

Gangnam style.

Host 1 (39:41)

Having 2020 vision or wanting money. Honey, that's it.

Guest/Host 3 (39:46)

I think money. Honey, that's it.

Host 2 (39:49)

Hello Dolly, Goodbye Columbus or Konnichiwa.

Guest/Host 3 (39:52)

I'm going. Last one.

Host 1 (39:55)

Being kicked while you're down or being kissed in that gang.

Guest/Host 3 (39:58)

Down. Pink kiss tonight.

Host 1 (40:01)

Oh, that's good. That's really nice.

Host 2 (40:03)

Okay, we rank all our guests on a scale of 0 to 1000 doves. And. Well, first of all, I really appreciated the laughing because it made me feel good about myself and people.

Host 1 (40:12)

Some people stone face. Some people stone face and go. This is one of the part where you laugh.

Guest/Host 3 (40:16)

Yeah.

Host 2 (40:23)

Like nothing you can say, Will. Like, like it's not for. This is a segment for us. Like it's for us to show off that sometimes we can rhyme.

Guest/Host 3 (40:29)

Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (40:31)

So what do you think? You know, let's start the year off with like a good.

Host 1 (40:34)

I think that was 942 doves.

Host 2 (40:36)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (40:36)

Oh, yeah.

Host 2 (40:37)

That was an amazing performance.

Host 1 (40:39)

I would say that's really, that's really good.

Guest/Host 3 (40:41)

I don't love that. You know, 58's pretty.50 is a lot of missing dubs. Right?

Host 2 (40:47)

No one's gonna miss that. Wow, not that Hollywood.

Host 1 (40:53)

That was queer. Are you closeted? Because that was good math. Anytime anyone is good at something, I'm gonna be like, wait, how did you learn that? How did you learn that?

Host 2 (41:06)

Well, it is true though, that when you meet someone who is closeted, you're like, oh, they will beat me at anything. Like, they're operating at a level that I can't even imagine.

Host 1 (41:13)

Oh my God.

Host 2 (41:14)

I unclenched decades ago.

Host 1 (41:16)

If I had been closeted for like 10 more years, like, could you imagine?

Guest/Host 3 (41:21)

That's what I'm saying.

Host 2 (41:21)

I would have an overall deal.

Host 1 (41:22)

I would.

Host 2 (41:23)

I'd be Shonda Rhymes. I would have created scandal.

Host 1 (41:27)

You would have.

Host 2 (41:28)

I'd be having dinner with Kerry Washington right now.

Host 1 (41:29)

Right now at. At 11am.

Host 2 (41:33)

Don'T you think Kerry was someone who'd be like, I like to have dinner at 4pm Just get it.

Guest/Host 3 (41:37)

Out of the way.

Host 1 (41:38)

Just get it out of the way. Then I can rest.

Guest/Host 3 (41:40)

That's. I. I don't like, like, here's the thing. I'm like, I don't, I don't worship food, but I do not. Like, when people are just like, food's not a big deal. I'm like, stop.

Host 2 (41:51)

It's very LA thing.

Guest/Host 3 (41:52)

Food is the best. Yeah, it's like, it's medium.

Host 2 (41:55)

Oh, my God.

Guest/Host 3 (41:56)

Stop, stop.

Host 1 (41:57)

Food is medium.

Guest/Host 3 (41:58)

No, it's not. What do you.

Host 2 (41:59)

No, this is one of our biggest differences.

Host 1 (42:01)

I. Every meal has to be good. That pisses me off.

Guest/Host 3 (42:04)

See, no, no, no, no. See, that is a different take and that I actually agree with that I don't think every meal has to be delicious because, like, at some point then it actually is just a health problem problem. But to pretend that, like, every meal couldn't be delicious.

Host 2 (42:21)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (42:21)

And that wouldn't rule is crazy. That's. That's my.

Host 1 (42:25)

Like, I just like, get appreciation fatigue. I, like, can only appreciate like one meal a week.

Host 2 (42:30)

But also, when it's time for us to eat, you are particular about what you want. Well, it's not like you're like, oh, give me whatever.

Host 1 (42:38)

Well, I like things that are spicy and that's pretty much it.

Guest/Host 3 (42:40)

Okay, but like, okay, let's. And like, I'm not even saying, like a ton of money. I'm saying just like, when you first, like, start making, like, you know, we'll say quote unquote, adult money from stand up or whatever and not from stand up over here. Okay, but. But no, I'd argue, like, even when you get like the 15 bucks, 12 bucks, whatever, and like, you can use that, like, there's still something to me that's very interesting and special about like taking that money and being like, oh, I could like, use this to buy cereal or candy or two slices of pizza or a milkshake or a sandwich like that. That's why food is still fun, is because you're like, I. The options are like, no one is telling you, like, even if you don't find it to be important, the fact that I could be like, hey, you're gonna eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for dinner? You're not like, okay, you're like, no, I want a salad.

Host 2 (43:30)

It's sort of how we learn choice.

Guest/Host 3 (43:32)

Yes.

Host 2 (43:32)

Like, food is how we learn.

Host 1 (43:34)

But I hate choices.

Host 2 (43:36)

I want government issues every day. I think, and I really think it's like the. Because even as children, sometimes maybe your parents give you like, $10 and you're like, you're on your own or like lunch money or whatever. It is like your first taste of, like, self actualization where you're like, I could do anything with this. Or. And I was strictly cocaine for all of elementary school. Yes. Or I got sober at 13.

Host 1 (44:04)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (44:05)

Cocaine or canes, you know, that's. That should be there. Is this. Is this raising?

Host 2 (44:12)

Is this Mr. Raising?

Host 1 (44:13)

Is this Mr. Raising?

Host 2 (44:14)

I wrote for girls and I have some ideas.

Host 1 (44:18)

I. Yeah, it's like when I spend like $16 on a sandwich and then I'm like, okay, now I have to also think about dinner.

Guest/Host 3 (44:25)

But just get a sandwich that you like.

Host 2 (44:27)

You're framing it as like this, like, curse. That's like the joy of life is.

Guest/Host 3 (44:30)

That you also have to think about God Day.

Host 2 (44:33)

Oh, my God.

Guest/Host 3 (44:34)

Okay, do you. You don't have a. You don't have a meal where you're like, all right, this is even. Even if I were sick of it, I could still eat this every day. You don't have that.

Host 1 (44:44)

I mean, I have that.

Guest/Host 3 (44:47)

Then you love food. You are what we call food.

Host 2 (44:50)

You know what?

Guest/Host 3 (44:50)

You know what it is?

Host 1 (44:51)

Chipotle, literally.

Guest/Host 3 (44:52)

Oh, yeah. My wife's the exact same way. Like, she'll. I mean, she will, like, be like, I was just on an international flight and they served this, this, and this. I'm like, that's awesome. Let's go home. And she's like, can we stop at Chipotle? And I'. We cannot stop at Chipotle because you are an adult person.

Host 1 (45:08)

There are certain days where it's like, if I get the idea of Chipotle in my head, I have to follow through on it.

Guest/Host 3 (45:13)

That that's understandable. I'm like that with Chinese food.

Host 1 (45:16)

Really?

Guest/Host 3 (45:16)

Yeah. There's certain days where I'm gonna say, you know what? It's talking to me. Baby, daddy or mama, depending on it doesn't matter, guys.

Host 1 (45:25)

Doesn't matter. Maybe daddy and daddy.

Guest/Host 3 (45:26)

Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Host 2 (45:30)

Okay, Yasser, what is your straight topic and what is straight about it?

Guest/Host 3 (45:34)

Okay, so it's, It's. I'm trying to frame it in a way that, like, makes the most sense. It's anti straight, pro gay, but is framed in a way that feels almost like it's still a dig. Wow. Okay. And it's that gay people are very good in the way that straight people are very terrible at saying, we're about to listen to this song, and then immediately connecting to Bluetooth. Gay people are like, and now it's Time to party. Bam. And you're just like, I didn't even know there was a speaker in here. Yeah, yeah. And I feel like straight people are, like, drooling, and they're touching all these things on their phone, and they're, like, swiping down to the corner, struggling with the ox is the topic, but ox, you know.

Host 1 (46:25)

Yeah, of course, of course.

Guest/Host 3 (46:26)

But I particularly connecting to a Bluetooth speaker when the vibe needs to be started immediately is something that a straight person will never, ever get right.

Host 1 (46:39)

You are so right. This is a really interesting thing.

Guest/Host 3 (46:43)

It actually troubles me. Cause I'm one of the guys. And then, like, the phone's falling out. People are just like, all right, now we're just listening to an Instagram reel.

Host 1 (46:51)

When other people are in charge, and, like, I'm at someone's house and they, like, aren't putting. Putting on music.

Host 2 (46:56)

I'm like, well, it relates to one of your other pet peeves, which is lighting. It's like, how straight people. You know, one of our pastry topics was overhead lighting. Like, they just think, like, just turning it on is enough to. And so I think it goes back to, like, the, like, vibe setting, basically. Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (47:15)

Okay. Yeah.

Host 2 (47:16)

Cause I think that for. I think for straight guys especially, I think they think of vibe setting as only a sex thing. Like, I do think they will, like, read books and articles that are, like, how to get the place ready for.

Guest/Host 3 (47:28)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (47:29)

And then. And then I think they don't know. But then when they have their boys over, it's just, like, overhead lighting playing. Actually, there was an episode of Abbott elementary about this recently. Plain couch pizza box.

Guest/Host 3 (47:44)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's. You are talking, Molly.

Host 1 (47:50)

That sounds awesome.

Guest/Host 3 (47:51)

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's no chicks. No chicks are allowed. All right.

Host 2 (47:57)

Paul Figue over.

Host 1 (48:00)

There's something I. Whenever I do hang out with straight guys, and it's, like, time. Like, if it's, like, three straight guys at my house, and then I'm like, okay, it's time to put on music. That's scary, too. Yeah, yeah. Because I'm like, well, how do we connect?

Guest/Host 3 (48:14)

Yeah, yeah.

Host 1 (48:15)

Because if I put on, like, rock Impala comes out, they are like, you don't have. You can put on your music. Like, you don't need to, like, pander to us. But I'm like, but, no, I can't. Because then if I put on gay music, you'll be like, this is annoying.

Ad Voice 2 (48:26)

What?

Guest/Host 3 (48:26)

Okay, and now here's the question. Question. What are you putting on, like, Is there. Do you have, like. Oh, this is my bridge artist.

Host 1 (48:32)

Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (48:33)

Oh, this is.

Host 2 (48:33)

That's a really.

Host 1 (48:34)

Bridge artist. Wow.

Guest/Host 3 (48:35)

Wow, wow.

Host 2 (48:36)

Well, just off the bat. Tame Impala.

Guest/Host 3 (48:38)

Well, I usually go like, that's a good one.

Host 1 (48:40)

I do like New Order. It's like, still a little dancing, but it's like, okay. But then all boys will be like, cool.

Guest/Host 3 (48:48)

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Host 1 (48:49)

All right.

Host 2 (48:49)

I also feel like there are certain pop stars that are like. Like, if you put on Janet Jackson and straight guys will be okay.

Guest/Host 3 (48:57)

Yeah, yeah, that's true.

Host 2 (48:58)

That have been like, she's been grandfathered in as, like, okay, well, that's someone that could be on, like, the Rock and Roll hall of Fame and, like, it's okay.

Guest/Host 3 (49:03)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 1 (49:04)

Or yeah. And you can pop on Ray of Light. Of course. Sure, sure. You always follow Ray of Light.

Guest/Host 3 (49:12)

Really?

Host 1 (49:13)

I think so. I think it's, like, trendy.

Guest/Host 3 (49:15)

No, I'm the one who enjoys it. I'm thinking about, like, if for the sake of argument, you guys are about to watch Prometheus.

Host 1 (49:22)

Totally.

Host 2 (49:22)

But first.

Guest/Host 3 (49:23)

First you're, like, talking and hanging out. Like, I can't imagine it's defin. I think.

Host 2 (49:30)

But I think. I think you think it's more of a bridge. Like, I think it's a bridge to, like, some guys, but I think you think it's more of a bridge of it.

Host 1 (49:36)

Actually, to me, I'm like, this is the most middle of the road music we have.

Guest/Host 3 (49:40)

All the straight homies are here. We're gonna listen to Ray of Light.

Host 1 (49:43)

We're gonna.

Guest/Host 3 (49:43)

We're gonna eat fat burger.

Host 1 (49:48)

Okay. When you say it out loud, of course, it does sound insane.

Host 2 (49:51)

I'm like, would I put on Vampire Weekend? Sure.

Host 1 (49:53)

That's a bridge. That's a bridge.

Guest/Host 3 (49:55)

Bridge. That's a bridge here. Because I. I have one that's like, please. It's more of a genre. And I have. My question is more like, I would go, like, if it was reverse, I would do like,'70s disco. Yeah, sure. A playlist that has, you know, let's say, you know, a Shaka Khan.

Host 2 (50:15)

Sure, sure, sure, sure.

Guest/Host 3 (50:16)

Parliament Funkadet. Like, something that, like. Because I feel like. And. And you guys. For you guys. You guys tell me. But it's like, the idea is that like. Like, if it feels like a party setting, then people are a little less inclined to be like, is this gay music? Right, Right. You know what I mean? Like, you know, is this a Dropkick Murphy?

Host 2 (50:36)

Well, there is something that happens. It's funny you mentioned that there's Something that happens where. And this, of course, most famously happened with, like, ymca where, like, the gayest, gayest, gayest thing. It's almost like it goes full circle and becomes wedding music.

Guest/Host 3 (50:48)

Right?

Host 2 (50:48)

Like, actually, like, Lady Gaga. Born this Way is basically a wedding song. Like, it's like, literally, the wedding DJ will put it on at, like, a straight, conservative wedding. And everyone's like, orient or Orient.

Host 1 (51:00)

What is the Orient made?

Host 2 (51:03)

Orient made, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (51:04)

Everyone.

Host 2 (51:04)

Everyone's like, yeah. Or, like, even, like, share believe. Like, just like. Like, these are the gayest possible songs.

Guest/Host 3 (51:14)

It.

Host 2 (51:14)

And I don't know. I wonder if it happens the other way around. Is there music that is so straight that it becomes gay?

Guest/Host 3 (51:20)

I don't.

Host 1 (51:21)

I don't know.

Guest/Host 3 (51:22)

Yeah, because it's like, no one's like.

Host 2 (51:24)

No one's, like, Journey, like.

Guest/Host 3 (51:25)

Or even just like, oh, man. You know, my favorite gay artist is Pantera. Because straight music isn't. Straight music isn't there to have fun. It's to prove how aggressive you are. Whereas, like, just actual music is meant to have fun, Right? It's meant to evoke an emotion. But, like, straight people are only angry all the time.

Host 1 (51:53)

I will say. Trying to, like, I had a holiday gathering.

Host 2 (51:56)

Yeah.

Host 1 (51:57)

And trying to, as a. As a gay guy, to try to make a playlist for a holiday gathering, I found really complicated because it's like, okay, so you're, like, doing, like, there's, like, the gay music and then there's the holiday music, and these don't go together. So, like. Like, I was like, how do I do this?

Guest/Host 3 (52:15)

What? Okay, can I. May I ask a question, please? What now? Let's. Can. Let's discount, like, completely. She's not allowed. We're not allowed to bring up Mariah Carey's All I Want For Christmas Is yous. Right?

Host 1 (52:28)

Yeah. Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (52:28)

Ye. What would be two songs on your playlist that are, like, that are holiday. These are. Yeah. Or that are conflicting. That you're like, this is a holiday song. And then this doesn't go with it. Like, are you, like, Bing Crosby? I'm literally going, like, justice, basically.

Host 1 (52:44)

Okay, so basically what I did was, like, I made two playlists.

Guest/Host 3 (52:48)

Okay.

Host 1 (52:48)

And, like, one was like, christmas Normal. And then one was like, I guess this will come on eventually. Like, normal. Then it was like, just music.

Host 2 (52:57)

I would have been like. Like, no. Like, I would have been like, Christmas music is too on the nose.

Guest/Host 3 (53:02)

Just.

Host 2 (53:02)

We're doing all FK twigs, but, like, at midnight, we're playing Last Christmas I gave you my Heart. Like, it's like, everyone's like, oh, my God. And then we go right back to normal.

Guest/Host 3 (53:15)

Right?

Host 1 (53:15)

No, I get.

Host 2 (53:16)

Because I think Christmas music can be really graded. Like, and I think people struggle. Like, there are people that have weird childhood associations with it. People that, like, I just. I don't want to trap people and have them only listen to Christmas music.

Host 1 (53:31)

But then at the same time, by the same token, I also don't want people to be trapped listening to gay party music when they're expecting, like, a cozy holiday time.

Guest/Host 3 (53:40)

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. But I gotta say, there's something funny again about, like, in a sweater and like, a yule log burning and then again, ray of light.

Host 2 (53:49)

And then ray of light.

Guest/Host 3 (53:50)

Yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (53:51)

That's kind of how I feel. I think it. Cause I think you can create a holiday ambiance visually. And then anything, anything is, like, subsumed into that. Like, you can even. You can play Linkin park and Jay Z album. And then if enough people are wearing Christmas sweaters, they'll be like, encore. Do you want more?

Host 1 (54:10)

I.

Guest/Host 3 (54:11)

Okay. I highly disagree. Okay.

Host 2 (54:16)

But is I actually proud of myself that I found the straightest possible album to listen?

Guest/Host 3 (54:20)

We're going to listen to Collision Course. Collision Course.

Host 2 (54:24)

Damn.

Guest/Host 3 (54:25)

That is so take me back.

Host 2 (54:28)

Look, that's my bridge music is playing. I. Like, I'm trying so hard that I'm playing Link and park jv.

Guest/Host 3 (54:33)

I don't know why that got me. That is so, like, here's my tree.

Host 2 (54:38)

I'm just, like, looking at the straight people.

Host 1 (54:39)

Like, are you having fun?

Host 2 (54:40)

Do you like this?

Guest/Host 3 (54:41)

Let's get those smiles up. Merry Christmas.

Host 1 (54:45)

Damn. Yeah. Wow.

Host 2 (54:47)

After this, we can watch Creed. Is that the movie? No.

Host 1 (54:51)

Which movie?

Host 2 (54:52)

There is a movie called Creed Box or.

Host 1 (54:54)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (54:56)

Okay.

Host 2 (54:56)

I was right.

Host 1 (54:57)

I thought you were talking about the band Creed.

Host 2 (54:58)

Oh, no, no, no. That would have been too obvious of a reference.

Guest/Host 3 (55:00)

I just. I thought. I guess I thought there was like, a reference from Creed. No, to.

Host 2 (55:05)

I was just thinking, what's like a box or like a violent sports ray?

Guest/Host 3 (55:09)

Right.

Host 2 (55:10)

Kree. I'm sure it is.

Guest/Host 3 (55:15)

Hey, you know what? Sexuality aside, you should watch. Just don't even think about it. And then go see Avatar, Fire and Ash.

Host 2 (55:26)

Avatar, Fire and Ash.

Host 1 (55:27)

I put my sexuality aside and I went to see Avatar.

Host 2 (55:29)

How was it?

Host 1 (55:29)

An amazing experience.

Host 2 (55:30)

I haven't seen this.

Guest/Host 3 (55:31)

Did you do 3D?

Host 1 (55:32)

I did. It was to die for.

Host 2 (55:33)

You should just do it.

Host 1 (55:34)

You should do it.

Host 2 (55:35)

Do you need to know what happened? No. Like, we can't.

Guest/Host 3 (55:37)

Yeah, I know. The Lore of the nine foot blue alien.

Host 1 (55:42)

It's actually a. Because I saw the second one, forgot it entirely. And then they basically just do the plot again.

Host 2 (55:48)

I heard a lady avatar that's really sexy and skinny.

Host 1 (55:51)

She's diva, you love her.

Host 2 (55:53)

And I saw some clip of James Cameron being interviewed and he's like, I told her to walk like Zoe, like Zoe Saldana. And she's like, that's not what mine would walk like. And then he was like. And then she walked pelvis first in a way that really brought a new depth to the character. I was like, you are an icon.

Guest/Host 3 (56:11)

He's.

Host 2 (56:12)

I mean, you are a legend again.

Guest/Host 3 (56:14)

That's where you're just like, yeah, man. Sometimes you gotta just let geniuses cook. I would never. If someone was like, I'm gonna walk like Zoe and they're like, no, I'm not going to. I'd be like, yes, you are. Yeah, totally, totally.

Host 2 (56:26)

Okay, but James Cameron. And I'm not saying James Cameron is gay seeming, but he has. But you know what I mean? It's like that's the type of. And he's not gay. He's not gay. That's the type of straight guy I am talking about where I. They have the almost like OCD of a gay guy and the aesthete mindset of a gay guy. But because they're also straight, they also have this insane confidence and just high demands and they walk into every room like they own it. And again, that is also Trump. I really just think there's that type of personality that's like, they run the world.

Host 1 (57:03)

No, I think that's genius.

Host 2 (57:05)

I can't even. I need to think of more examples. But honestly, rock stars, like if you think about a rock star.

Guest/Host 3 (57:12)

I mean, like, granted, granted the other.

Host 2 (57:15)

Stuff, but definitely like rock stars and rappers, they both. It's like, sorry, but rapper. It's like, so you're talking about how much you love jewelry. That's like gay.

Guest/Host 3 (57:26)

I'm not even trying to be this guy. But it's like, they're all gay.

Host 2 (57:30)

That's another thing that's real. We keep going back to like, well, they are gay. They're.

Host 1 (57:37)

That is where it gets complicated.

Guest/Host 3 (57:38)

And I'm like, that's a. And I'm like, it. The bummer is that you're like, we would be so much further in culture if this were just the.

Host 1 (57:46)

Anyway, well, so they're like not even out to like their friends. Like, it's not like a secret. Where they're like. But once we're in this house, we're.

Host 2 (57:54)

Just talking about rappers writ largers, if you are.

Guest/Host 3 (57:58)

But it's like a. Like, it's all, like, in the ways of. I experienced it at least. Like, it was a pretty crazy party. It's like, yeah, you were doing some pretty insane things that people that claim to do the things that you do would not be doing. It's very interesting.

Host 2 (58:17)

Interesting.

Guest/Host 3 (58:18)

Yeah.

Host 1 (58:18)

Interesting.

Guest/Host 3 (58:19)

What would be cooler is that, like, I do these things, and I also do these things.

Host 1 (58:24)

Yeah, sure, sure, sure.

Guest/Host 3 (58:25)

We're not like, they're genuinely, like, I just. We're so in need of just, like, not like, we've had enough Dahmers. We need like a just, like, do rag. Omar from the Wire. Gay guy.

Host 1 (58:39)

Just like.

Guest/Host 3 (58:40)

Yes. You know what I'm saying? Carrying a Mossberg shotgun.

Host 2 (58:43)

And that spectrum is Dahmer. And then gay guy in a durag.

Guest/Host 3 (58:48)

Yes, yes.

Host 1 (58:49)

And Yaris is right in the middle.

Host 2 (58:50)

Is right in the middle.

Host 1 (58:51)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (58:52)

Just fighting for his life.

Host 2 (58:53)

Yaris is like, we're having a wedding, but on a budget.

Guest/Host 3 (59:01)

Yeah. We can't talk about the thing that we were talking about before, but I have so many questions that, you know.

Host 2 (59:05)

I know.

Guest/Host 3 (59:05)

Well.

Host 2 (59:06)

Well, that'll be Patreon exclusive.

Guest/Host 3 (59:08)

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (59:09)

So anyway, what is Allison Williams like?

Guest/Host 3 (59:13)

I know. I'm glad you asked. And, yeah, and I'm gonna say, like, this is, like, so corny, but number. I am 41 years old, and I've, like, fallen into this really weird earnestness in a way that I never thought I was going to. So I have to. So I'll answer your question. So. But I wanted to preface it with that so people don't think that I'm just like, is it she?

Host 2 (59:37)

No, you have edge.

Host 1 (59:39)

You're edgy. You're edgy as hell.

Guest/Host 3 (59:42)

I. You know, when I started working there, she, you know, Lena was a writer on the show. Clearly, it's her show, so I was with her all the time.

Host 2 (59:51)

The time.

Guest/Host 3 (59:51)

But the actors and actresses or the actresses and actors you don't really inter. You know, interact with until you like your own set, blah, blah, blah. She was so nice to me from day one in a way that I was like, I mean, this feels racist and so. And I mean, this so genuinely kind and, like, ask me about, like, my family and, like, where I grew up in Georgia and blah, blah, blah. And it's like, you know, by the way, it's like her father's one of the most intelligent men who's ever been on tv. So it's she carries a bunch of intelligence as well. Just, she's just been around all of this for so long, and so she's so nice and. And, like, granted, her character is hilarious on the show. She was, like, a killer in conversation, really. I was just like, this person is just like, she. And I mean this sincerely. Like, you're like, damn, that is like the homie. Like, and I. There's been a few times out here, like, I don't actually. Like, we email from time to time, just, like, catch up or whatever, but, like, there are times where, like, we just, like, physically run into each other in the world. And I'm always like, I really wish we, like, lived around each other more. Like, like, genuinely. We'll just, like, sit, and no matter where we are, we'll just talk for 20 minutes. I'm like, she just. She just rules. I think she's so interesting. I think that, like. And, like, this is kind of the curse of that show in a lot of ways. It just. They were all too good at what they did. Carlton Banks disease a little bit where you're just like, if tomorrow he's like, I'm going to play, you know, 50 Cent. You're like, no, you're not happening.

Host 1 (61:40)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (61:41)

Or be on Power to the where.

Host 2 (61:43)

Everything she's done since, which she's been very good at, has almost been a commentary on Marnie. It's like, yeah, like, you know, like.

Guest/Host 3 (61:49)

It'S hard and it's like, by the way, it's like her and Megan and girls are so wildly different, but in your head, like, you're just like, same person. You know what I mean? Like, it's really. But. But I say all that to say that, like, she is legitimately, like, as a person, person, person. Like, like, you don't like. And I know it's horny to say, too. Like, there's not a. You don't meet so many people that you're like, wow, I genuinely liked them versus, like, they were totally fine. Like, I genuinely, in my heart, I'm just like, I hope for nothing but the best for her constantly. She's just. She's the best.

Host 1 (62:26)

Well, I love you. That's huge. Did she ever come into the writer's room and be like, hey, could you guys, like, write me smart this episode? She. She. I just one f. Like, could I be smart?

Guest/Host 3 (62:39)

I know she had conversations with, like, they all had conversations with Lena, for sure. And then, you know, her and the other showrunner, Jenny Connor, you know, they would come in and without being Like, I talked to so and so. They're like, well, we were thinking maybe Jessa could. And you're like, no, okay. Randomly. You were just thinking about this last night, you know, or the. God, what's that? That Zosa, like, Zosia's character should suddenly have this crazy turn. You just. That just popped in your head, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's. I don't know. You know, I was. I was least close to Zosia, but it's crazy.

Host 2 (63:21)

Her dad is David Mamet. What is Growing up in that household.

Guest/Host 3 (63:25)

But it's like, what do you. You know, like, and. And, you know, blah, blah, blah, conversation around Nepa baby.

Host 2 (63:30)

But I don't even. That's not even what I mean.

Guest/Host 3 (63:32)

Like, I'm saying that. I'm saying in general, all. It's. It's hard because what do you do? Yeah, that. That's genuinely my qu. Like, you know, and that's what I was saying. The. The concept of it aside, it's just like, you know, it. It just. The thing that sucks. And I'm not defending anyone sincerely, but, like, we don't care when it's plumbers. It's just. Just like, you just get the best version of inheriting a business, right? And I. I'm, by the way, someone. When I see it, I'm like, no, no. Like, if your parent was here, you should absolutely not be allowed to do it unless it's me, and you chose me to be with you, because that would be really great. You know, I would even go so.

Host 2 (64:16)

Far as to say, it's okay. Get ready for this tape.

Host 1 (64:19)

Oh, I'm scared. I'm scared.

Host 2 (64:20)

It's actually the most unfair for Nepa babies in entertainment because, yes, you get a leg up.

Guest/Host 3 (64:27)

Oh, but hear me out.

Host 2 (64:29)

No, no, hear me out.

Host 1 (64:30)

No, keep going.

Host 2 (64:31)

Plumber just inherits the business, and that's it. Then Nepo baby, basically, still has to. Obviously, they get a huge, huge, huge leg up. But in their mind, they're like, hello, I should be able to waltz into any room. I'm Meryl Streep's daughter. But guess what? They still have to, on some level, prove themselves. And by the way, if an audience hates them, that's it. That's like, what? You know what I mean?

Host 1 (64:53)

It's not guaranteed.

Host 2 (64:55)

It's not guaranteed that you'll be the next Meryl Streep, whereas if you're a plumber, it literally is guaranteed that you're inheriting, you know, Lester and Sons.

Host 1 (65:05)

Okay, I think it goes. I Think it's harder to be a Nepo baby than to be in Venezuela right now?

Host 2 (65:11)

No, no, I'm comparing Nepo babies to other Nepo babies.

Guest/Host 3 (65:16)

Okay, but. But the argument that I would make. Yeah, the argument that I would make. And it's like, there's this book called Nickel and Dimed by Barbara Aaron. Right.

Host 2 (65:25)

I think. Oh, I'm familiar.

Guest/Host 3 (65:30)

For all my readers out there.

Host 2 (65:32)

Oh, my God, I can't believe you're coming back with Barbara Ehrenreich.

Guest/Host 3 (65:34)

But here's. But the point that she makes at the end of the book, that always stuck with me and even mine, like, I have no. I'm nothing, you know, so, like, I have no connections to anybody. I came out here by myself, blah, blah, blah. But my point is, is that in that book, you know, the whole point of it is that, like, I'm gonna work crappy jobs and see what it's like and, like, live in a motel and, you know, and to prove does it how far it paycheck really goes, the end of the book, she's like, this was really hard, but at the end of it, no matter what, no matter how hard I was struggling, I knew I had a safety net because I could just stop at any moment and I could just go live my life again, and the book would be over. And I think that with, like, the whole Nepo baby conversation, I think that is left out more than anything. The thing that's always put into. Into conversation is the ego part, right? Like, you know, if you're talking about, like, brawny James and being like, he'll never be as good as LeBron, I'm like, that is true. And that part of it absolutely sucks. He will always have six Lamborghinis.

Host 1 (66:35)

You know what I mean?

Host 2 (66:36)

Yeah, but that's more money. Like, right?

Guest/Host 3 (66:38)

But then. Then the flip to that argument is, like, but if you've always had money, is the ego thing more important to you? You know what I'm saying? So, like, that, to me, it's more of a struggle between, like, do I want to be rich or do I want to be famous? Because for us. Us, right.

Host 1 (66:53)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (66:54)

If someone throws it at you, you pretty much know, like, I want this thing, like, no matter which one you choose, right?

Host 1 (66:59)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (67:00)

But for them, it's like, one is always going to be there. So it's like, what? What do you want? You know? And like. And fame is really just power. You know what I'm saying? So, like, so back to. Back to Allison Williams. But I will say for someone who had all of that, like, and I don't mean it just in the way it's like, oh, you could never tell. It's like, you know, I also, you know, like, Malia Obama worked as an intern, you know, so it's like I met really important people who have very important parents. And like, the thing that, I guess that, like, I guess the thing that about so many of these conversations, sue, is that it's kind of hard to, I don't know, digest, if you will, is that like a lot of these people, like, they're just kind of like, yeah, man, I know. Like most of them know. They're not like, oh, I can't believe I got to. And then like, the thing that sucks is that they know. And then someone's like, do you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (68:04)

And it confirms their. And confirms their worst fears. Cuz they're going around being like, everyone here is thinking it.

Guest/Host 3 (68:09)

Exactly.

Host 2 (68:09)

But then people are pretending to like, like, oh, good job on these notes, or whatever.

Guest/Host 3 (68:14)

Now, that being said. Yeah. None of them should have any opportunity. It should be me. I should get every job. It should just be us three working.

Host 1 (68:25)

Needless to say, there actually needs to be some sort of program that like links up people without famous parents to people with famous parents.

Guest/Host 3 (68:32)

I agree.

Host 1 (68:32)

You, like, have to work. Well, of course the famous parent one would be the actor.

Guest/Host 3 (68:36)

You're the writer.

Host 1 (68:37)

Because no one can look at your disgusting, hideous, non famous face.

Host 2 (68:40)

But. Well, yeah, and because the one with the famous parents, like, sits down to write a script and it's like dad said.

Host 1 (68:46)

Yeah. They're like, so what is a house? Like, so this takes place in Ohio. What is that?

Host 2 (68:52)

I think I have a theory and I think your Allison Williams story confirms it. I think that for really, really rich Nepo babies, going to an elite university is actually their version of like slumming it and meeting normal people. Like, I actually think it's like, it's really good that Allison Williams went to Yale or like that Emma Watson went to Brown. And it's like, because for the average person, going to an elite university is like, oh my God, I'm. I'm in community with all these like, wealthy people. For them, they're like, wow, I met someone. His mom is a doctor. Right, Exactly.

Guest/Host 3 (69:26)

There was like, there was not a single dignitary. What? And so I really.

Host 2 (69:31)

Because a lot of especially Hollywood NEPA people skip college because why would they go? And I think it's like, genuinely, like, send your kid to Harvard.

Guest/Host 3 (69:40)

Yeah.

Host 2 (69:41)

Like, do it, because that's the only place literally, that they will meet even semi normal kids.

Host 1 (69:46)

I also love your use of Nepo people. Is it a Nepo baby?

Host 2 (69:51)

You know what it is? I hate when something becomes a cliche. It's like, honestly, adulting and Sunday scaries. It's like the second you say the phrase Nepo baby, you're suddenly part of a larger conversation. And I want to clarify, I'm not part of that.

Host 1 (70:06)

I'm talking about Nepo people.

Guest/Host 3 (70:07)

Yes, yes, they're grown ups. Yeah, well, it's also just like, look, we don't need to be in Vulture again. And you know, once he use the phrase, like, oh, you know, on the pod.

Host 2 (70:22)

Exactly.

Guest/Host 3 (70:24)

But no, I, I just, just, I don't know. I guess put my stamp on my end of this conversation is that, like, most of them, again, like, it, it's hard in any way. Like, you know what I, I think what it is. And I, I, they're not struggles. Let me, let me clarify that. Like, when people try to be like, well, it's a str. I'm like, it's not a struggle, so stop. But the, I think the hardest part of, I would think of being a Nepo baby of the ones that I know that are, again, like, homies, friends, very funny, very cool, generous, all that stuff. You guys, please don't cut off your supply of gifts to me. But no, what I say for real is that, like, they're there in the same way that if you are a minority of any sort, if you are a gay person, a black person, a woman, blah, blah, blah, people are just like, you're, Now I'm dragging you into this conversation, and you're like, I actually don't have an opinion on it. And they're like, yeah, you do. Now I'm gonna talk to you about it. Whereas, like, then you have, like, the ones who want to, like, like Ben Stiller, anytime the word is brought up, he just shows up somewhere and he's like, it's actually hard for us. I don't know if hard is the right word. It's different for sure. Sure. But like, you know, my mom couldn't call Lauren Michaels and be like, my baby's got it.

Host 1 (71:41)

Yeah, give him a shot.

Guest/Host 3 (71:42)

Yeah, yeah, he would be a great buckwheat.

Host 1 (71:47)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (71:48)

But, yeah, it's just like anything else. We're just kind of like, yeah, just like, no one wants to talk about this. Like, we all know what's happening and none of us want to talk about it, you know, What? I mean, I think one of the.

Host 1 (71:57)

Best parts of being a Nepo person, a Nepo adult, would have to be that the bar is on the floor. So.

Guest/Host 3 (72:04)

Sure.

Host 1 (72:05)

Like, whenever you meet anyone, they're like. And actually, he knew how to use a fork.

Host 2 (72:09)

Yeah, no, completely.

Host 1 (72:12)

That must be the most amazing feeling. He looked me in the eyes and said, hello.

Host 2 (72:16)

I actually feel that way. Also, about. We recently met someone who was on a reality show. You and I did.

Host 1 (72:20)

Yes.

Host 2 (72:21)

And I.

Guest/Host 3 (72:22)

We're gonna say their name, and we're gonna say the show.

Host 2 (72:24)

You sort of assume.

Guest/Host 3 (72:27)

We're gonna say the name. You sort of assume you're gonna say the show.

Host 2 (72:31)

These people are complete sociopaths.

Guest/Host 3 (72:33)

Right, right, right.

Host 2 (72:33)

And this person was, like, articulate.

Host 1 (72:35)

Oh, he was the most charming man I've ever met.

Host 2 (72:38)

Well, that's the thing. And of course. Of course I kept going. I was, like, drunk, and I kept going around being like, he is so nice. He is so charming. Like, I can't believe how charming he is. I thought. And it's like, right. That's kind of how you get on reality tv. I had that realization, like, later in the cold light of day, and I was like, oh, damn, he got me that he was doing his, you know, tape for Drag Race.

Host 1 (72:59)

Well, he, like, treated me like a human. And I was like, oh, my God, this is the nicest guy I've ever.

Host 2 (73:03)

Yeah, it's ask questions.

Guest/Host 3 (73:06)

But going back to the fork thing, the reason why it is so impressive when they can use a fork is because their skill set is in the other thing. Right.

Host 2 (73:16)

Completely.

Guest/Host 3 (73:17)

You meet these people and you see them talk to a room of other celebrity, and you're like, whoa, I could never do that. You know, it's all political.

Host 2 (73:28)

They grew up, like, this skill of schmoozing, which you have to learn as a regular person. That was their first. That was their first introduction to socializing.

Guest/Host 3 (73:38)

Exactly. They're like.

Host 2 (73:39)

They learned schmoozing before they learned. So how's your mom?

Guest/Host 3 (73:42)

Right.

Host 2 (73:45)

Wow. Which is kind of crazy to think about.

Host 1 (73:47)

It is kind of crazy to think about.

Host 2 (73:48)

It's also like, if you were raised, let's say, like, in the Mafia, you first learn, like, swindle. Like, you first learn. Learn, like, criminal behavior before you learn, like, non criminal behavior.

Guest/Host 3 (74:01)

Swindling.

Host 1 (74:02)

I grew up.

Host 2 (74:03)

Right. That's not even the right.

Guest/Host 3 (74:04)

You know, you grew up a pirate. You have to.

Host 1 (74:07)

Yeah.

Host 2 (74:07)

So it's like, I have many friends that were pirates, and it was much more difficult for them to break into the entertainment industry. But in the pirate world, like, they could have their dad's ship.

Guest/Host 3 (74:18)

Like.

Host 1 (74:20)

I don't know, like, they first learned to walk with a peg leg.

Guest/Host 3 (74:24)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 1 (74:25)

I mean, then they learn with normal leg.

Guest/Host 3 (74:27)

Yeah, yeah.

Host 2 (74:28)

The.

Guest/Host 3 (74:28)

The first time they learned to embroider, they were putting skulls and crossbones on flags.

Host 2 (74:33)

Someone that, like, grew up a pirate. That's so like, old Vice magazine, like, the day. A day in the life of like. Like, yeah, I grew up a pirate. Like, but I. Then I moved to Williamsburg.

Host 1 (74:44)

Well, yeah, he would absolutely have, like, a. An indie album that would be, like, really successful and be like. Actually, what's crazy is he grew up on a ship.

Host 2 (74:50)

Yeah.

Host 1 (74:52)

His dad's a pirate.

Guest/Host 3 (74:53)

God.

Host 2 (74:54)

You know.

Guest/Host 3 (74:54)

You know, that's how, you know the world sucks because, like, we can't even enjoy those fun. Like, we haven't even found there's no more niche communities because everything is niche now. I know.

Host 2 (75:06)

No, it's actually so frustrating.

Guest/Host 3 (75:08)

Like, you know, like, you know, and, you know, far be it for me to be someone who, like, complains about things they see online, and it's just like, you know, my algorithm is trash, and it's just like, every other day now. It's like some weird thing being like, oh, I bet you didn't know that Poly couples have 15 kids and all of them are actually dating. And you're like, no, I didn't know that. And there is no world where I wanted to. That is. And by the way, stop saying that. It's a community. It is. You guys.

Host 2 (75:41)

You guys know the thing now. Now let's.

Guest/Host 3 (75:44)

Yeah, let's wake that up. Yeah.

Host 1 (75:46)

Okay. You have something about this, like, a.

Host 2 (75:50)

Bit about, like, community.

Host 1 (75:52)

What was it?

Host 2 (75:53)

Well, of course, one of my favorite things is when people say, like, the intelligence community, the, like.

Guest/Host 3 (75:59)

Yeah.

Host 2 (75:59)

The business community, the work community means something very specific.

Guest/Host 3 (76:03)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Host 1 (76:04)

Was it fisting Twitter?

Host 2 (76:05)

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (76:06)

Oh, wait, wait. Let's hear it.

Host 2 (76:08)

No, no, it's not a bit, but I just. I. I got served some clip of, like, a very, like, sex positive podcast.

Guest/Host 3 (76:14)

Yeah.

Host 2 (76:14)

And they had, like, a fisting expert on. And he was talking about fisting and, like, common misconceptions, and he's like. And that's why it's so important to push back against these narratives on fisting Twitter. He was being so, like, earnest and serious about it. I was like, you know what? Like, go off like, this is your world. Like, clearly you spend your time on fisting Twitter, and far be it for me to, like, express Any opinion about that. But it's so funny that everything. There's no such thing as, like, a stray piece of knowledge or a stray fact. It's like, it's part of a community's vernacular, and you have to be. Be like, either coming into it from a respectful place or as an outsider, or, like, have 15 different caveats that are like, well, of course I don't fist, but I have friends who do. It's like, I should be able to make a joke about fisting, right? Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (77:03)

And by the way it start. My knowledge starts and ends with that joke. There's not another piece of knowledge or that needs to come. Yeah, it's. Oh, sorry, Sam.

Host 1 (77:12)

Well, what's amazing about fisting Twitter is that, like, it will because of community forums, it just eventually will, like, turn right wing somehow. It will, like, influence the next election. And it's like, actually, if you were looking at fishing Twitter in 2026, like, you would have known that 2030 would have turned out the way it did.

Host 2 (77:29)

It's like with Gamergate.

Host 1 (77:30)

Exactly.

Guest/Host 3 (77:31)

Yeah. Which one? Sorry?

Host 2 (77:32)

You know Gamergate. Oh, yes, yes, yes. It's like how, like, that sort of, like, foreshadowed so much of like.

Guest/Host 3 (77:37)

Yeah, yeah. They're just like a woman could not possibly understand. Sorry, what? They're like, we're voting.

Host 2 (77:43)

Yeah, exactly. We're now in the White House.

Host 1 (77:47)

No, it's crazy.

Guest/Host 3 (77:48)

And the other thing, too, is that really to fisting Twitter?

Host 2 (77:52)

Yes, of course.

Guest/Host 3 (77:52)

Is that when you do the joke right, and even if you're like, for the sake of argument, you read two pages on it and you're like, oh, did you know this? There's inevitably some weird follower or some weird message that you get that's like, oh, well, actually, I've loved it for 14 years.

Host 2 (78:11)

Here's the thing.

Guest/Host 3 (78:12)

And I'm like, so wait, this thing that I've never brought up and that you've definitely never brought up, you've. You've loved for four. Just like this. This suddenly, like, I. Oh, like, I'm the expert now. Like, holding court in the comments. Chelsea Peretti used to always say that. She was just like, I just can't say when people hold court in comments.

Host 1 (78:34)

That's really good.

Guest/Host 3 (78:35)

It really. I'm always like, oh, yeah, that's. It is what it is. Like, you know, it always just like, even if it's, like, innocent, be like, you know, hey, this restaurant. I'm from Georgia. Like, hey, this restaurant is the best. If you're, like, in Atlanta and people will be like, oh, but did you know? And I'm like, even if I didn't know that.

Host 2 (78:53)

Shut up. I don't.

Guest/Host 3 (78:55)

This isn't a conversation.

Host 2 (78:56)

Not everything is a prompt.

Guest/Host 3 (78:57)

Yes, that's exactly it.

Host 2 (78:59)

But and I think that goes back to like holding court in the comments like people and you know, know when part of your job is like we have to like release like little decontextualized clips that are like got, you know, and hope that we get some crumbs in return. But it's like that one person for.

Guest/Host 3 (79:16)

Free will say I liked this.

Host 2 (79:18)

And you're like, that's not a fully formed thought. But then it's like it's this double edged sword where the thing that does best is a thing that sounds like a fully formed thought, but then that in turn makes it look like you're making a complete argument. That now is up for debate.

Guest/Host 3 (79:33)

Yeah.

Host 2 (79:34)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (79:34)

I love the Internet.

Host 1 (79:35)

I love the Internet. You should post I needed this, you guys. Like I needed to like get my confidence back.

Host 2 (79:41)

You should post that the sex and heated rivalry is not realistic.

Guest/Host 3 (79:45)

Is that how you feel?

Host 1 (79:46)

No, it's not how I feel. That was like Jordan first got in hot water for saying that the sex and heated rivalry isn't real.

Ad Voice 2 (79:53)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (79:54)

Okay.

Host 2 (79:54)

But then he made up with the.

Host 1 (79:55)

And then it was a whole promo for both shows. It was amazing for everyone in the industry.

Guest/Host 3 (80:00)

Well for like I love LA and.

Host 2 (80:02)

Heated rivalry because they're both in hbo.

Guest/Host 3 (80:04)

Oh.

Host 1 (80:04)

So they, they linked up and all was well.

Guest/Host 3 (80:09)

What a weird like you just can't like and like here's the thing. I actually don't think anyone should have opinions on anything ever. But it is weird that you kind of just can't like say a thing and then just like it's crazy. Okay, I'm saying this thing now. Leave me alone.

Host 2 (80:23)

Yeah, or just like talk amongst yourselves.

Host 1 (80:26)

Right?

Host 2 (80:26)

Yeah, let's have the discussion. Not be public like cuz I do. Cuz people have always argued about like when Jane Fonda expressed opinion, people would argue about it, but it wouldn't. But she wouldn't get a notification every time someone was like, you dumb.

Guest/Host 3 (80:41)

Yeah, well, I mean the government was.

Host 1 (80:43)

Like, sure, sure, sure.

Guest/Host 3 (80:45)

Okay, well, well, new rule.

Host 2 (80:48)

I'm dumbar. Unless the CIA is after me, I don't want to hear the reaction.

Guest/Host 3 (80:52)

I like that.

Host 1 (80:52)

That's a good rule.

Guest/Host 3 (80:54)

Say something.

Host 2 (80:55)

Nobody else I, I. The intelligence community.

Guest/Host 3 (80:58)

Yes. Oh yeah.

Host 2 (80:59)

I'm more than happy you drop a.

Guest/Host 3 (81:02)

Special all of a sudden.

Host 1 (81:06)

Should we wrap up?

Host 2 (81:08)

No, we have to I'm having such.

Host 1 (81:09)

A good time, but I know I could talk forever. We're theorizing in such amazing ways.

Guest/Host 3 (81:13)

We're here and we're just gonna keep going. That sucks. This was so fun.

Host 2 (81:17)

I know.

Host 1 (81:18)

What a blast. Well, we have a final segment.

Host 2 (81:20)

Final segment. Okay, explain it.

Host 1 (81:23)

We were like playing chicken with each other, right?

Host 2 (81:25)

Yeah.

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Host 1 (83:29)

Okay so our final segment is called Shout Outs. And in this segment, we pay homage to the grand straight tradition of the radio. Shout out. Shouting out. People, places, things, ideas, anything at all. Imagine you are at TRL shouting out to your squad back home. Yeah, Yeah, I have one. You go first.

Host 2 (83:44)

You go first.

Host 1 (83:44)

You go first.

Host 2 (83:45)

Okay. But you might be mad at me because I might be taking yours.

Host 1 (83:48)

You won't be.

Host 2 (83:49)

Okay. Okay. What's up, lgbtq? I want to give a shout out to Joel Kim. Booster Shout out. And his new husband, John Michael. And we were. We did not talk about it at all in this episode, somehow, but we were just at Joel's wedding in San Francisco. That is how we rung in the new year. And pretty much, I've never felt more. That love is love and that love wins. It was a beautiful wedding. They both look phenomenal. We were not allowed to post photos of them until January 9th.

Host 1 (84:21)

Yes.

Guest/Host 3 (84:22)

Because.

Host 2 (84:22)

Because who knows? But let's just say you might want to subscribe to a magazine or two. But I will. So I'm not actually allowed to describe what they look like, but I will say they both looked stunning. I'm literally like, can you upcycle it and give it to me?

Host 1 (84:40)

Yeah, you should steal it.

Host 2 (84:41)

I should steal it. And so, pretty much, we love Joel. He's always been so lovely and supportive of us. One of our great friends, and I wish them the best in their life together, and I hope one. And I hope they have twins soon.

Guest/Host 3 (84:58)

Woo.

Host 1 (84:59)

Well, that was amazing.

Host 2 (85:00)

Thank you.

Host 1 (85:01)

You actually did get into murky water because we're not supposed to post the pictures of them before January 9th, but are we allowed to describe it in detail?

Host 2 (85:08)

I know. Also, maybe this episode will come out on January 9, when undisclosed thing comes out as well.

Host 1 (85:18)

Yeah. So we'll be in the clear by the time this comes out.

Host 2 (85:19)

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we'll collab.

Host 1 (85:21)

We'll collab. Yeah. Hit us up for a collab on the post. We are so in. Okay. What's up, freaks, losers, and perverts around the globe? I want to give a huge shout out to Misery, the movie.

Host 2 (85:33)

Oh, yeah.

Host 1 (85:34)

I watched this movie for the first time two days ago, and I said, damn, movies used to be so good. Whatever happened to frank films? And I was completely enamored. I think it's so such a good mixture of stressful and funny in a way that I didn't know was possible. And what is up with Stephen King? How does he do so much? We need to figure this out. How is he doing so much. If I wrote one book in my life, I'd be like, done.

Host 2 (86:02)

He's writing 100 and they're not.

Host 1 (86:04)

And they're good and they're different. Something's not right. I'm gonna blow the whistle on him. Something's going on in there. But other than that, the film was amazing. So shout out to the whole team. Xox though Sam, I wonder if he's on Ritalin.

Guest/Host 3 (86:14)

Well, I mean, he's also like, famously an Epstein guy, so.

Host 2 (86:19)

Is he?

Guest/Host 3 (86:20)

Oh, yeah, he's an Epstein guy.

Host 2 (86:22)

Like, he was, you know, I was gonna say he's a faggy straight guy, but I guess he's a different kind of straight guy.

Guest/Host 3 (86:27)

Yeah.

Host 1 (86:30)

Damn, that's tough.

Host 2 (86:31)

That's tough. Well, Sam takes it all back.

Host 1 (86:33)

I take it all back, of course.

Guest/Host 3 (86:34)

No, no, no, no. I mean, like, here's the thing. It's not. It was more one of those things that like. And this happened to a few guys where they were like, who even cares about the epine list? And then the list came out and they're like, okay, okay, okay, wait a second. Okay, okay, okay. All right. Am I. Is it me?

Host 1 (86:50)

Whenever you're ready.

Guest/Host 3 (86:52)

What's up, all my sweet tooth? And also my, my salty little salt heads. I want to, I want to shout out the combo of you two together. And I, my, my biggest shout out right now goes to grapes and Cheez. Its a perfect, a perfect, perfect, perfect snack. You get, you get the hit of the sweet with the grape, but you also get a little bit of sour. But then what comes in, you got the crunch of the cheez it and you got the salt and you got the cheese. I mean, if you're talking about snacks, you're talking about someone who's really thinking about elevating the way they live their day to day and wants a combination of all those things and doesn't have the time to necessarily seek those things out. You're not doing better than you can do with a Cheez it with a little, little grape. I'm saying it sing. But clearly you're going to have about 20 cheez its. I'm going to have about 20 grapes. People go cotton candy. I say go with the traditional green or traditional red. You don't have to spend $40 on grapes, you know, but if you are like me and you are someone who's on the go and you're like, hey, I need it all. I need it all right now, and I need it fast and I need it accessible and I need it to preferably be in my cup holder while I'm racing down the highway. You cannot do any better than Ch, Cheez its and grapes.

Host 2 (88:11)

Wow. Perfect snack for someone of mixed employment.

Host 1 (88:14)

I would say.

Host 2 (88:15)

It's kind of like.

Host 1 (88:16)

It's very mixed employment.

Host 2 (88:17)

It's very mixed employment.

Host 1 (88:18)

High, low.

Host 2 (88:19)

You're like, I can't decide if I'm rich or poor right now. I'm gonna do cheez its and grapes.

Guest/Host 3 (88:23)

Oh, interesting. Which thing do you attribute to rich, and which thing do you attribute to being broke?

Host 2 (88:28)

I would say grapes. Rich. Cheez, its broke.

Host 1 (88:31)

I would say the same.

Guest/Host 3 (88:32)

I'm genuinely wondering. It's just. So grapes are the expensive.

Host 1 (88:36)

Well, because grapes also go back, so you have to, like, have them fruit.

Host 2 (88:39)

As, like, a treat or something.

Host 1 (88:41)

It's kind of luxury. I know.

Guest/Host 3 (88:42)

Yeah, but. But I'd also like.

Host 2 (88:45)

It's like anything, I guess, fresh produce as opposed to, like, canned.

Guest/Host 3 (88:50)

Right.

Host 2 (88:51)

You know, like, I. Anything fresh I think of as, like, whole foods.

Guest/Host 3 (88:54)

But I would argue if you were buying it with, like. Let's say you were buying it with, like, SNAP benefits and someone saw you go through, they would be like that. That welfare brat's buying Jesus with my money.

Host 2 (89:06)

I see. Yeah, yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (89:09)

Like, so that's why I take the cheese.

Host 2 (89:11)

It's away. I see. I see people playing with snap.

Guest/Host 3 (89:15)

Excuse me.

Host 1 (89:16)

No, no, no, no, no.

Host 2 (89:17)

That's my money.

Guest/Host 3 (89:18)

I swim.

Host 2 (89:19)

Of mixed employment.

Guest/Host 3 (89:20)

I saw someone with SNAP benefits try to buy a hot meal, and I blew on it. And to cool it down.

Host 1 (89:24)

To cool it down.

Guest/Host 3 (89:28)

And then I warmed up their ice cream. You're gonna have to eat. You have to freeze that again when you get home.

Host 2 (89:35)

Wow.

Guest/Host 3 (89:36)

Wow.

Host 2 (89:36)

Well, what an amazing place to end.

Host 1 (89:38)

We're doing activism every single day, so that's awesome.

Guest/Host 3 (89:41)

Also, can I say this? Like, look, this wasn't on the pod earlier, but yeah, Sam lives in la and we're gonna hang out. I'm gonna force you to hang out. Are you a diner person?

Host 1 (89:53)

I like a diner.

Guest/Host 3 (89:54)

Oh, wait, you don't like food? You want to go hang out at Barnes and Noble? Like, oh, this guy. Hey, this is my impression of Sam. Hey, can we go peruse?

Host 1 (90:02)

No, I'm not like.

Host 2 (90:05)

A. I think a diner is perfect for you because you don't care about food. So it's like. It's just like, normal prices, normal food. Everything is kind of medium, but okay.

Guest/Host 3 (90:15)

This place has pancakes and the best quesadillas.

Host 1 (90:17)

Really? Which place?

Guest/Host 3 (90:18)

It's called B's. There's one in Glendale, and there's one in Burbank.

Host 1 (90:21)

Whoa. I've got to go.

Guest/Host 3 (90:23)

It's. We. Hey, hey. We are going. We're going.

Host 1 (90:28)

We're getting quesadillas.

Guest/Host 3 (90:29)

Yeah.

Host 1 (90:29)

Damn, I can't wait.

Guest/Host 3 (90:30)

Yeah.

Host 2 (90:31)

Love this. The beginning of something beautiful.

Guest/Host 3 (90:32)

You're not invited. Don't ask.

Host 1 (90:33)

He's here this month.

Host 2 (90:34)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm here this month. Interesting. February.

Host 1 (90:38)

In February.

Host 2 (90:40)

So, yeah, let's pencil it in for.

Host 1 (90:41)

Feb. Well, thanks so much for doing the podcast.

Guest/Host 3 (90:44)

Thank you.

Host 2 (90:46)

Do you have. I know you have written the next a few Jurassic park movies, but is there anything more immediate that you do want to promote since you are on a podcast?

Guest/Host 3 (90:53)

Oh, God, no.

Host 1 (90:54)

And that's amazing.

Guest/Host 3 (90:55)

Like, yeah, I mean, like, here's the thing. Like, just, I don't know. If you see that I'm going to be doing a show, come out to the show.

Host 1 (91:02)

Yeah.

Guest/Host 3 (91:03)

You know, if you see someone, watch Sweet Georgie's Special.

Host 2 (91:07)

Oh, I thought you were going to say watch your movie with Susan stranded.

Guest/Host 3 (91:10)

Oh, yes, yes. Watch the gutter on Hulu. Shmeek Morrison, Sarandon, Darcy Card and Paul Reiser.

Host 2 (91:17)

I mean, shout out.

Guest/Host 3 (91:18)

There you go.

Host 2 (91:19)

I was once in an elevator with Susan stranded. So I'm kind of in between this.

Guest/Host 3 (91:24)

New York, I'm assuming.

Host 2 (91:25)

In New York. Yes. I went to a party in her building. A different apartment in her building. Needless to say, one of my more affluent friends.

Guest/Host 3 (91:34)

She lives in the. She lives in the ghetto.

Host 2 (91:35)

She lives. No, it's really crazy. She's doing Nickel and Dimed. Actually, she's writing the Secret.

Host 1 (91:42)

Nickel and Dime two is real and I'm two.

Host 2 (91:45)

It's Susan's friend.

Host 1 (91:47)

Don't look at me. I'm Susan. All right. Okay, bye. Podcast ends now.

Guest/Host 3 (91:55)

Want more?

Host 2 (91:56)

Subscribe to our Patreon for two extra episodes a month. Discord Access and more by heading to patreon.com Stradiolab and for all our visual learners.

Host 1 (92:06)

Free full length video episodes are available on our YouTube.

Host 2 (92:09)

Now get back to work.

Host 1 (92:10)

Stradia Lab is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money players network and iHeart.

Host 2 (92:14)

Podcasts, created and hosted by George Severis and Sam Taggart, executive produced by Will.

Host 1 (92:19)

Ferrell Hansani and Olivia Aguilar, co produced by Bay Wang, Edited and engineered by Adam Avalos.

Host 2 (92:25)

Artwork by Michael Fales and Matt Grubb.

Host 1 (92:27)

Theme music by Ben Kling.

Announcer (92:34)

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