EPISODE 61: Seven Paramedics

Summary

Strangers on a Bench

Episode 61: Seven Paramedics
Host: Tom Rosenthal
Date: November 10, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this poignant episode, Tom Rosenthal sits down with an anonymous retired lorry driver in a London park. They discuss the realities of life after retirement, coping with the loss of a life partner, love that transcends death, the role of humor and family, brushes with fate (including a moving tale involving seven paramedics), and reflections on aging, friendship, and finding joy in small routines. The frank, warm, and distinctly British conversation is full of wit, hard-earned wisdom, and heart.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Retirement, Loneliness, and Routine

• Monotony and Isolation:
  The guest describes every day as feeling the same after retirement, especially since losing his partner:
  • "Every day is the same to me because I'm retired. I lost my partner in November, so I'm bored to tears." [00:48]
• Daily Structure:
  Despite mobility issues, he forces himself outdoors to sit on benches, people-watch, and keep a touch of routine.
  • “If I don’t do it, sit in house and die.” [02:38]
• Finding Connection:
  He cherishes brief exchanges—saying “good morning” to passersby—as small acts of connection:
  • “People walk past and say good morning. So I say good morning... It’s a little bit.” [03:39]

2. The Joys and Pains of Family

• Grandchildren as Comfort:
  Time with grandchildren provides comic relief and motivation:
  • “I tease the life out of them... running them about. I’m a taxi for them.” [03:06, 25:14]
• Playful Memories:
  A prank with ice cream leaves a lasting memory (and a lesson):
  • “It backfired on me because he burst out crying because he saw the difference... But that’s me.” [04:24]
• Legacy and Priorities:
  A hospital stay prompts a vow:
  • “The rest of my life I’m going to spend with my grandkids... I make sure I see them.” [05:07]

3. A Lifetime of Love and Loss

• Unmarried Partners:
  The guest recounts 47 years with his partner, never married but deeply committed:
  • “We were together 47 here.” [06:01]
  • “The beauty of us. We never argued, me and her, really. No. I mean, we had words.” [06:09]
• Enduring Affection:
  He describes ritual conversations with her urn, believing she sends him comforting signs:
  • "I’ve got her urn at home, it’s in the sitting room... I talk to her and I feel a presence when I’m talking to her." [06:56]
  • On receiving 'signs' from his late partner via music: "I think she could see I was fed up... she’s put something nice on for me." [08:45]
• Death and Acceptance:
  Although overwhelmed after her sudden passing, he reflects with acceptance:
  • "Death doesn’t bother me. It’s gonna come to you, you know. But my partner, she just never woke up. Which was a lovely death in my eyes." [09:23]

4. The Night Seven Paramedics Came

• Crisis Recalled:
  The guest delivers a detailed, raw retelling of his partner’s final moments—a health crisis at dawn, the desperate emergency call, and a house suddenly full of paramedics:
  • “Seven, truthfully, seven paramedics. But I’m there crying with bleeding eyes out.” [10:13]
• The Kindness of Strangers:
  He highlights the care of a young female paramedic:
  • “She was absolutely brilliant... She was putting my mind at ease... phoned my daughters.” [10:35]
• Hospitals and Letting Go:
  The ordeal in the hospital ends with him making the unimaginable decision to turn off life support:
  • “I didn’t want to be the person to say, turn my partner’s thing off, but I ended up. I had to.” [12:01]
  • Parting words: “I kissed her on the cheek and I just said to her, wait for me, love, won’t you?” [13:21]

5. Regret, Normalcy, and Memory

• “I Wish…” Realizations:
  He expresses regret over things unsaid, but believes she knew he loved her:
  • “I wish I’d have said... I wish I said that, but there again, she knew I loved her.” [13:32]
• Humorous Affection:
  • “She was. Truthfully, she was one of the biggest morning farts that ever walked on this earth. But she was my morning fart and I didn’t mind.” [14:21]
• How They Met:
  The story of their relationship, beginning with secret meetings at a wine bar in Leicester while both were married, is told with mischievous honesty:
  • “Did you have an affair with her? Yeah. Yeah. Well, we did eventually. Yeah.” [15:43]
  • “It’s me or the lorry, she said. I picked her. So I picked a lot of it.” [16:02, 16:30]

6. Life on the Road

• Memories from Lorry Driving:
  Nostalgic for beautiful British places and camaraderie with fellow drivers:
  • “I used to like Cornwall, you know.” [16:48]
  • “After a long day, go park up, bath. Oh, Chinese restaurant...always got talking to another lorry driver.” [17:26]
• Lone Journeys:
  He shares how radio kept him company and how picking up the occasional hitchhiker provided memorable, if sometimes shady, company:
  • “Radio. Radio. Radio station 2 classic at 4.” [18:13]

7. Facing Mortality

• Cancer Diagnosis:
  With typical bluntness and good humor, he describes the moment of diagnosis and what followed:
  • “I've just got an audible feeling down. And he said, that's... natural to get... You've got 18 months to live.” [25:45]
  • "He looked at me and he says, bloody hell, don’t you look well? ... We found out that we were a bit wrong. ... it's not as bad." [26:19]
• Staying Positive:
  He refuses to let illness define or limit him:
  • “I'm getting out. I'm not going to sit in the house and die.” [26:39]
  • “My grandkids keep on telling me, saying, grandad, don’t leave us yet. And I said, I ain’t going nowhere yet, love.” [27:00]
• Friendship vs. Loneliness:
  Admits that evening loneliness bites the hardest; wishes for a new companion, not for romance, but someone to share daily routines:
  • “I’d like a friend. ... when I get home on my own, it'd be nice to have a friend who would say, ‘I’m in McDonald’s now having a coffee, want to come down and have one with me?’” [23:22]
  • “It is a lonely life... but it’s on a night time when I’ve locked that door...” [28:28]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Losing His Partner:
  “I talk to her and I feel a presence when I’m talking to her. I tell her what I’m going to do today... I hope you’re having one [a cup of tea] somewhere else.” [06:56]
• On Regret:
  “You take people for granted...I wish I'd have taken her for that coffee which I promised...But you don't realize until after something's happened.” [13:32]
• On Humor and Love:
  “She was one of the biggest morning farts that ever walked on this earth. But she was my morning fart.” [14:21]
• On Finding New Companionship:
  “It would be nice... someone who would say, ‘I’m having fish and chips tonight. Shall I get twice? Your house or my house?’ ... But when it gets to my age, it don't happen.” [23:22]
• On Facing Cancer:
  “But how I feel, I feel good in myself...I make sure that I'm doing what I'm doing... I'm getting out.” [26:39]
• On Small Joys:
  “My hobby, running me grandkids around. I don't mind being a taxi for them. I enjoy it.” [25:14]
• Closing Poetic Monologue (C, voice):
  “Life, death and a whole lot of... What else do you expect? No regret. Go bollocks. Sit on a bench in loving memory...” [29:12]

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Important Timestamps

• 00:48 – Guest describes retirement and loneliness
• 03:06 – On time with grandchildren
• 05:07 – On making a vow to spend more time with grandkids after a cancer diagnosis
• 06:56 – On ongoing conversations with his late partner
• 09:58–13:21 – Story of partner’s passing, seven paramedics, and letting go
• 13:32–14:21 – Regrets and humorous memories
• 16:48–18:13 – Reflections on lorry driving, travel, and coping with solitude
• 23:22 – Wishing for companionship in old age
• 25:45–26:39 – Cancer diagnosis and determination to live fully
• 29:12–30:30 – Poetic closing reflection on love, loss, and the road

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Tone and Style

The mood is unfiltered and reflective, with moments of biting humor and authentic vulnerability. The conversation is deeply human: both rooted in the everyday and facing life’s existential edge. The guest’s Yorkshire wit, directness, and warmth shine throughout.

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Conclusion

This episode provides an unvarnished look at the emotional landscape of retirement, bereavement, and aging—made rich by humor, memories, and the small routines that keep us going. It’s a meditation on partnership, ordinary heroism, and the grace of being noticed—even by a stranger on a bench.

Transcript

[A]

Hello. Sorry to bother you. Can I ask you a slightly odd question? I'm making a podcast called Strangers on a Bench, where essentially I talk to people I don't know on benches for 10 or 15 minutes. Are you up for that? Do you want to give it a. Do you have a favorite day of the week?

[B]

No, no, no. Every day is the same to me because I'm retired. I lost my partner in November, so I'm bored to tears. I've got note to do apart from come here, watch people go by, envy them because they're normally in toes and I'm on my own. Or you'll see joggers going by and thinking, I wish I could do that because I can't, because I can't walk good. Oh, but that's it, you know. I know it sounds like a soft sob, snoring, but it isn't. Retirement's a great life if you're healthy and you've got hobbies and this, that and the other. Apart from that. It's not.

[A]

Have you got hobbies?

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

You've got to get you some.

[B]

The reason I haven't got hobbies, I was a lorry driver. I used to go away Sunday and come back Friday night. So my hobby was going all over England, Scotland and Wales. So in the lorry, I didn't have time for the.

[A]

What were you driving around?

[B]

Oh, kitchen units.

[A]

Kitchen units?

[B]

Yeah. So it would. All building sites.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

My district was always London South.

[A]

How long were your journeys?

[B]

Well, our depot used to be in Boston Spa, not far from here, about 10 miles away from here. I could go from there straight out of Cornwall to do a drop.

[A]

Yeah. What's your concentration like?

[B]

Oh, I'm good. From there downwards is no good. From there upwards, I've got it all.

[A]

The head is wonderful. That's probably the better way around, no? Yeah, if you had to choose.

[B]

Yeah. But then again, he said, I've got to plug myself out. My car's parked over there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I know that I can walk from there around here on this bench, have 20 minutes, get up, go around and you see that, them benches over there? I go for a walk around there.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

That's my exercise.

[A]

Is that your daily routine?

[B]

Well, if I don't do it, sit in house and die.

[A]

We don't want to do that.

[B]

I don't mean that to sound sort of thing. You know what I mean, but that's how it is. Obviously, if it were bouncing down my rain, I won't be doing it. But you Know if it's a nice day, I get myself out, I do what I've got to do and I'm quite content.

[A]

What else is in this daily routine of yours now then?

[B]

Not a lot to be truthful, apart from going to see my grandkids and all this, that, the other, you know.

[A]

Oh, that's nice.

[B]

Tease the life out of them sort of thing. But no, well, actually I tease the life out of them before I come here because I drive them about. So if they need a bit of shopping, I'll take them shopping. Then when I finish that, I come here, then just sit down and watch. Watch these, Watch people feeding them.

[A]

How do you feel about swans? There's a lot of them in front of us.

[B]

I know there is. You know, I wondered why they've never been on someone's menu. Because for Christmas, you know what I mean, the big out there. But then as I said, it's gives me something to do.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

If you come here tomorrow, I'd rather have to be sat at the same place doing the same thing. But yeah, but I don't mind, I don't mind it because people walk past and say good morning. So I say good morning, but that's night. It's a little bit.

[A]

I agree, that's wonderful inside action.

[B]

If you know, I don't mean a full blown conversation about your own life and this, that and the other, you know.

[A]

But I've been walking around here this morning. I've had so many lovely hellos.

[B]

Yeah. Been beautiful.

[A]

Yeah, been wonderful. So tell me, how do you tease your grandchildren?

[B]

I wind them up, you know, like, I'll give you one instance and it's so, so funny really. Ice cream van were outside. Called him Sammy, this one, he's now 11. And I bought two ice creams and I said to ice cream fella, you mind just putting the right little bit on one and doing the proper one with there? Which he did do. He just gave me it. So when I went in house and I said, here, Sammy, that's yours and this is mine. Obviously I'd got the big one for him. Yeah. And I was gonna have the little one, but it was here, Sammy, that's your. And he looked, but it backfired on me because he burst out crying because he saw the difference, you know what I mean? But, but that's me.

[A]

See, that's brilliant.

[B]

That's my sort of wind up. You know what kids are like? No. They want the biggest out of everything. I really like that, you know.

[A]

Do you think it's important to kind of test them out a bit like that.

[B]

Well, I must be truthful. I've got cancer. I've got patriotic cancer. And when I was in hospital, you've got a lot of time to think. And I sat there and I thought, the rest of my life I'm going to spend with my grandkids. And I try and see them as much as I can. Now, I've made it my own pledge that I make sure that I see them.

[A]

Wonderful.

[B]

And I like to wind it, but they enjoy it themselves, you see, because they sort of fire back in their own little way, of course. They fire back and I find it comical.

[A]

Yes, you're strengthening them up. Yeah, toughening them. And then in the nicest way possible.

[B]

Yeah. One of them calls me Grandpapa and I find that very, very amusing. Grandpapa, Grandpap.

[A]

Can you tell me about your partner? About your wife? Was it your wife?

[B]

Well, not partner. She want me wife. We were together 47 here.

[A]

You didn't get married?

[B]

No, we're just quite content as we were.

[A]

Absolutely fine.

[B]

The beauty of us. We never argued, me and her, really. No. I mean, we had words.

[A]

What's the difference between having words and arguing?

[B]

Well, if I were losing it with her, my words would be, oh, shut up, woman. And she'd fire back and say, go, bollocks. But five minutes after it were finished, you were. None of this I'm going to talk to you for next week sort of thing. It just didn't happen, you know. I mean, nowadays you get young kids there and they have an argument and they wanted to get divorced. They don't work it.

[A]

Interesting. So you think young, young people don't work it, but do you feel like you work to your relationship then?

[B]

Well, it worked for 47 years. Yeah. It have been 48 years now, if we'd been. Unfortunately, I lost her.

[A]

So what was special about her?

[B]

I loved her. That's what was special about, you know, like someone who always says, I've got my partner in life. I love that woman and I did love her. I've got her on my phone, I look at her every day, I talk to her every day. People might think that's stupid, you know, you're talking to her. I've got her earn at home, it's in the sitting room there. And I talk to her and I feel a presence when I'm talking to her. I tell her what I'm going to do today. Like more than likely tomorrow morning. I'll say, oh, I met a fellow down at Roundy park. We had a right going down about blah, blah, blah. Just. Just tell her that. And then I'll say, I'll see you at dinner time when I come back and I'll. I'm here. I'm having a cup of tea. Can't make you one last, but I hope you're having one somewhere else. That sort of.

[A]

Do you hear her respond? Do you hear her voice?

[B]

No. The only response I've ever had. And this sounds so, so stupid and I still can't understand it. I'm going back maybe a month now. And I was sat in the house on my own, miserable, looking at telly, not on telly. And all of a sudden my hand were wet. The water was all over my hand. I live in a flat. I looked above, seeing if. If it were leaky, if not above. And there was nothing. And all I can think is she's throwing water on me to say that I'm here. That's all I can think of. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah. Does she like throwing water around generally?

[B]

No. No, it wasn't. No. I went having a cup of tea and thought I spilled it over, but it was just there.

[A]

So you take it as a sign?

[B]

I took it as a sign, yeah. I'll tell you another one, a silly one as Well. I like 60s music. Yeah. I was born in 47, but I like 60s music. I love YouTube on the telly. And I will go through YouTube, going through YouTube and I will. Fed up and a record. Come on. Some were placed by Percy Faith.

[A]

Can you sing it for me?

[B]

No, it's an instrumental. Yeah. This had come on. So few little tears in my eyes because it would hear a favorite song. But when I flicked over, next song were a song that I'd play. One after that. What A song that I'd play and one after that. When I got to about 20 records of listening to it, this was half the night. They were all songs that I'd play. And I think that she could see that I was fed up with myself. And she's put somewhat nice on for me, you know, I love it. Believe it or believe it.

[A]

No, I mean, it's. I think it's important that we believe.

[B]

I mean, I believe that I'm gonna see her. I mean, I know that of what I've got, you can't kill her. So I know that eventually I'm gonna see her and I'm quite content, you know, death doesn't bother me. It's gonna come to you, you know. But my partner, she just never woke up. Which was a lovely death in my eyes. I mean, you see these poor people in hospital and they're suffering for years and then these idiots, these bloody do gooders, let's keep them alive with tablets and all that way if you want to die, you know what I mean? You want them.

[A]

Did you think she wanted to die?

[B]

No. Every Friday she used to have hairdresser, used to come, come to house and they come for the last 30 year and she's come every Friday. I used to laugh, I used to say to her, you're gonna get your head done now and all you're gonna do is go to bed. Then when you get up in morning it's gonna be a mess and you're gonna have to do it yourself. And she said, shut up, it's my money. Said, fair enough then. And this particular Friday night she'd done it, laughing and joking. We'd had our cups of tea, gone to bed and this, that and the other. And she woke me up, it may be 5 o' clock in the morning, she said, I can't breathe, I can't breathe. And she'd gone into sitting room and she'd gone into a chair and by the time I got up, what were only a minute or so, two minutes and she was slumped in the chair and I thought, I bet she's having a rubbish night. I made a cup of tea, put it aside and I kept pat your teeth, your teeth getting cold, part your teeth getting cold. And then eventually I realized she's not waking up. Hence to say that I phoned 999, seven paramedics run through. No, seven. Seven, truthfully, seven paramedics. But I'm there crying with bleeding eyes out. And one of them, she was absolutely brilliant. She was a youngish girl, but she'd been taught well. She was putting my mind at ease, you know, oh, do you want a phone or this or the other? I said, oh, I want my daughters here. She found the numbers, telephoned them and the one at paramedics come into bedroom and he says, we've got her out going again, but we're going to take her down at hospital. Took her down at hospital, she never woke up. I was the only thick person and there must have been 30 of us in the room. I was the only thick person thinking that she was going to come round, you know, because her eyes were flickering and this, that and the other, all others, the news you were dead.

[A]

But I don't think you were thick, you Just. You were just.

[B]

They couldn't tell me. Well, I was hoping that, as I said, after all them years, you know what I mean? But she had tubes down the throat and all this. It wasn't nice. It wasn't nice. Eventually, one of the doctors come in and he said, she's not going to wake up. We're going to have to turn the things off. But someone's got to say, turn it off. And I looked around everybody and I didn't want to be the person to say, turn my partner's thing off, but I ended up. I had to. And then we sat there and sat there. Nurse kept coming in and saying, she's holding on, she's holding on, she's holding on, she's holding on. He's dead. Then after that end of the story, I kissed her on the cheek and I just said to her, wait for me, love, won't you? And that was. That's my story. So what she's doing now, I hope she's up there with a son. I mean, a son died 14, 15 years ago. So I hope she's up there with him having a latte and a walk about. Whatever you do up there, I hope that's happening. And it keeps me happy. It keeps me happy.

[A]

Do you wish you. Do you think about sounds? So it says, you know, you didn't get a chance to say stuff to her before she died.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What would you have said?

[B]

I don't know. You. You take people for granted. I mean, I'm taking you for granted. You could be the biggest murderer in Lee. So I don't mean that. No, you know what I mean. You take her for granted. I wish I'd have said. I wish I'd have done. I wish I'd have taken her for that coffee, which I promised, you know what I mean? So. But you don't you realize after something's happened. But. But now, as I said, I'm on my own. Your mind works over time, thinking, I wish I'd have told her this. I wish I said that, but there again, she knew I loved her. I didn't have to tell her a lot. I didn't have to tell her I loved her. She knew. I. I say she. She was. Truthfully, she was one of the biggest morning farts that ever walked on this earth. But she was my morning fart and I didn't mind. She want a morning fart.

[A]

What is she mad about?

[B]

Silly little thing. Oh, grandkids have got me nerves of this. Silly little stupid things, you know, What I mean, but you say, I'll leave it. That's all. That's all.

[A]

Tell me about when you first started seeing each other. The moment where you felt a connection. The moment you felt that you knew this is a person you're going to be with for long time.

[B]

You're going back a lot of years, Dad.

[A]

I know.

[B]

We used to park when they used to be coming home from London. She come from Leicester. And we used to park up on a Thursday night because Thursday night were a good night, if you know what I mean, in Leicester. Used to go to a place called Beer Keller Beerkeller, a wine bar. Come Beer. But all it had were like an organist and a thing. But the atmosphere were good. And she used to be down there and like, I'm talking to you. He just kept talking and talking and I'll see you next week if I'm here. Are you all right, then? And he just. It just blossomed. He just blossomed. You see, when you're on your own all week and you're just talking to the odd person when you. When you go do a drop, it's nice to have a little bit of a conversation with somebody, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Urdan, her husband wasn't getting on and.

[A]

She was married at the time.

[B]

She was married, yeah. Well, that's a long story, which I won't get into that with you type of thing. You know what I mean? But, cd did you have an affair with her? Yeah. Yeah. Well, we did eventually. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Secret affair.

[B]

Oh. Ah. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

What was that like?

[B]

No, it was all right, actually. It was spicing up your life a little bit, if you know what I mean.

[A]

Did you have a partner as well?

[B]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. We weren't getting up. She was fed up with me just coming on Friday nights. It was a stepping stone in your life that eventually you. You were going to park company. Yeah. Because when Pat come up here to live, she gave me the ultimatum, it's a Lottie or me. And I picked her. So I picked a lot of it. What a very good choice.

[A]

Did you miss anything from Lorry life?

[B]

No, not at all. Yeah. No, no. Yeah. No, I'm lying there. I do. I miss some beautiful places I used to go to and I used to get paid to do it.

[A]

What was your favorite place?

[B]

I used to like Cornwall, you know.

[A]

So you would park a lorry up and then go and see a lovely spot? Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Well, most of these car parks, it's funny. It's very nice. I used to like going To Colchester because the lolly park was in the middle of Colchester but it had a swimming bass at the side of the car. Park at the side of the car, but so. And they had baths in them days. So obviously you've been away two or three days. I don't mean you stink sort of thing, but you go for a nice bath and when you come up there, just up the road maybe distance from here to where that couple is over there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's got a Chinese restaurant.

[A]

Brilliant.

[B]

So you go park up, bath. Oh, Chinese restaurant. That leave you till maybe 8 o'. Clock, then you sit down, you always got talking to another lorry driver or what sort of a day we had. Then you go to bed, then in the morning you start again.

[A]

Fantastic.

[B]

Oh, it is. It would have gone, you know. Well, you have to work it out yourself. Some Lottie's drivers, I know, I mean they'd go away Sunday and they wouldn't have a change of clothes to nothing, they wouldn't have a razor and you could see if they were like tramps.

[A]

And well, you kept yourself smart. Well, you were seeing ladies as well.

[B]

You said no, only one.

[A]

So yeah, only one. Of course, only one. I'm guessing you're in the lorry on your own. No one else was with you?

[B]

Oh no, you just raised.

[A]

How did you combat the loneliness of that Radio. Radio?

[B]

Radio.

[A]

What Radio station 2 classic at 4.

[B]

O' clock when they were driving. 4 o' clock in the afternoon, it was an hour play and I used to look forward because if I'm doing a couple of hundred mile driving. Yeah, that there is nice because you could chuckle to yourself. So I think, you know.

[A]

Did you ever pick up any hitchhikers?

[B]

A few. A few. A lot of them are ladies of the night, if you know what I mean. And you don't. You bypass them. They haven't been washed for the bleeding wheat for the start because they're living on service stations sort of things. But then you'd see. You'd see a couple outside the road sort of thing, the IT checking out of London. It used to have some decent conversations with them sort of thing.

[A]

Do you remember anything?

[B]

No, I.

[A]

Dad, were you. Are you a good driver then?

[B]

Well, I've done it. I've only had one bad crash in all my driving life. I've had a few speed.

[A]

What happened in the bad one?

[B]

No, well, actually it was on the A1. I was going from what, this side of A1 to other side to one at service stations and delivering some stuff and I looked in my mirror and I saw this.in the distance, in the distance going back and I'll make that. By the time I turned my wheel it run into me. I thought I'd kill four people. I thought I'd genuinely kill husband, wife and two kids. And this, this, this smart ass copper who was in front of me driving, he said I've seen everything now he's got his eyes on road auntie, but you can see me at the back sort of thing. It was a pure simple accent, it was genuine, nothing ever happened. You know, I didn't go to court, I didn't do nothing. But I thought, I thought I'd killed him. But as I said, this one is smart ass copper. This is why I don't like coppers. I think 90 of them are liars. Interesting, but I've never liked. I don't like comments for that reason.

[A]

I've had any other run ins with coppers.

[B]

Only speeding and that's it, you know.

[A]

So we used to drive speed.

[B]

Oh, Whit Laurie. Well, it was money. The more loads I got done, the more money I got. So you know, do you have a.

[A]

Favorite motorway or services? Any favorite services. But you know the service as well.

[B]

I mean the one that I forgot what they call it now, Woodhall, that's at Sheffield. Don't go in it. It's like walking into 1950s. It said it's a.

[A]

What was wrong with the 1950s?

[B]

No, it's never been altered. Yeah, that's what I mean. You look and think you friggin. All these tables could have been. You could have renewed this. You could. It's just, it's horrible. You've nothing where you could look and say, oh, you know, sweat. That's nice, these are nice comfortable seats, that sort of thing, you know.

[A]

Can you tell me what you were like as a child?

[B]

Bloody hell fire. I don't know. You want a quiet kid actually. I mean my childhood were good. I mean I had a good mom and dad.

[A]

Well, this may be a better way to ask this question. Let's imagine a typical childhood Sunday. Maybe you're 10, you know, 8, 10 kind of age. What would it look like? What have you been doing?

[B]

Out playing. My mum had turned around to me and say, your dinner's on table at 4. If you're not in, you're not getting it. And that used to be it, you know. So you made sure. Yeah, but in them days, you see, you'd play all day, you'd play cowboys and Indians all day long. Or you'd go into wood. But as I said, your mum's words were low. Yeah. You know, she want a stern mother. Far from it, you know, she had a lovely mother, but she had the rules, you know, she had the rules.

[A]

What about your dad?

[B]

He was a bus driver. He was a dad. Well, actually, when he first started off, he went out piss. And he went to be a bus driver. Front bus driver, went into Yorkshire Electric.

[A]

What did he learn from your parents, do you think?

[B]

Fundamentally, I learned from my dad to speak my mind. You won't walk over me. If I think you're wrong, I'll tell you. And I learned my daughter the same because there's that many people try and get one over on you and you know it's wrong, but that's me. My partner used to say, he knows to me, you'll get your nose punched one of these days.

[A]

Have you ever had your nose punched?

[B]

No, no, no, no, no.

[A]

She was wrong.

[B]

No. But I am outspoken, yeah. I've got through my life now and nowadays I'm 78 years old, my. My fighting days have gone in, sort of thing. So, you know, But I've still got a big mouth. I've still got a big mouth.

[A]

So anything apart from seeing the grandkids you're keen to do with the rest of your life?

[B]

I said what I would like. I'd like. I'd like a friend. I'd like a lady friend. I don't mean for what anybody's thinking, but it'd be nice. I'm all right throughout day, but like 4 o', clock, 5 o' clock, when I go home on my own, it'd be nice to have a friend who would say, oh, telephone up and say, I'm in McDonald's now having a coffee. Want to come down and have one with me? I'm having fish and chips tonight. Shall I get twice? Your house or my house? You know where I'm coming from. Yeah, but when he gets to my age, it don't happen. It don't happen.

[A]

But there must be other people in your position who. Who are, you know.

[B]

Well, it's sort of fine. It's fine, you see. I mean, you don't find them. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm a very friendly person. I go to McDonald's every morning and I. I class them as my birds. I've got two birds there. We meet up every morning and we just have a laugh together. Then when we've had coffee, they go their way, I go mine. But it's not something which you could push farther because the friends.

[A]

But how did you find them then? Have you found them? Maybe you can find them.

[B]

No, no, actually, them. When we partner with alive, we all used to sit together.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So it isn't something what just happened. Yeah, you've seen ones, but that's just, you know, that's just how it was. I think we've virtually got through everything, don't you? I've enjoyed it, actually.

[A]

Well, that's good.

[B]

I like it now and obviously it's bringing back memories and you are asking questions, you're not asking personal questions, you know, you're just asking questions. And it's nice, you know, it is nice. I've enjoyed it.

[A]

Good. I was going to ask you about your hobbies. I mean, we can get you one.

[B]

No, you can't do something. No, there isn't. Truthfully. Yeah. I have got a hobby, running me grandkids around. I'm a taxi for them. But I don't mind being a taxi for them. I enjoy it. As I said, I pledge to myself, if you can think back when I were in hospital, I want to see my grandkids as much as I can. I mean, once you've gone, you've gone. Course, you know, once you've gone.

[A]

Two more questions for you, then I'll leave you alone.

[B]

Go on.

[A]

What was it like for you to be diagnosed with cancer? How do you. What was that moment like?

[B]

You know. You know, I got the coldest shiver down my back and I said to doctor, I said, I've just got an audible feeling down. And he said, that's. That is natural to get. And we'd had a conversation and he said, I've got to tell you now, at the worst scenario, you've got 18 months to live. He said, I've got to tell you that. He said, it means nothing. It's only a month or so that I went to see him again just for a consultation and he looked at me and he says, bloody hell, don't you look well? I said, I feel well. He said, dear. I said, I feel good in myself, you know. He said, well, you know, you've got that pancreatic cancer, which is the worst one you can get. It's the most aggressive one. He said, well, we found out that we were a bit wrong. Call that your pantiotic. And it's there. Well, there's a little stem that comes off of it and that's not as bad.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So I said, My 18 months could be Much longer. But how I feel, I feel good in myself, but I make sure that I'm doing what I'm doing. I'm getting out. I'm not going to sit in the house and die. Yeah, I want to get out and do that, you know, I like that. Wonderful. I think so. Plus, I mean, my grandkids keep on it, telling me, saying, grandad, don't leave us yet. And I said, I ain't going nowhere yet, love. I think. I think there's a time in your life when you'll know in your own mind that your time's coming up. I. I genuinely think that, you know, right, ask your last question.

[A]

What are you going to do next?

[B]

Gonna go walk over there and sit there for maybe half an hour. Then I'll more likely go home, make myself a nice cup of tea, put YouTube on, see if he's out on YouTube. Or I might go see me make. He just lives over at Road from where I am. We just talk a lot of rubbish. But apart from that, my dead, my day doesn't alter. And no, I said, I'll rephrase that. My life doesn't alter because what I'm doing today, I'll do it tomorrow and I'll do it next day. That's where a friend had come in because a friend might say, let's go to day. I like that. Have you ever been to Hasbro?

[A]

No.

[B]

Beautiful place. Absolutely gorgeous place.

[A]

Well, thank you so much for talking to me.

[B]

Where's my feet? Coming through.

[A]

It's in the post. I really hope you find your friend. Well, keep looking. I was. That's what I was saying.

[B]

I'm not looking looking, don't get me wrong, looking a little bit looking side eye. It's like Pat, when I met Pat, I wasn't looking for her, she just appeared.

[A]

I'm sure someone will pay for you.

[B]

I'd like to think so, because it is a lonely life. As I say throughout day, it's brilliant. I enjoy myself, but it's on a night time when I've locked that door, made me on, see, sat down and looked at six o' clock now figured out I ain't going to bed till 10. I've got four hours to do. I won't say the words, will I? Will nothing. You know what I mean? Anyway, take all this stuff off you.

[A]

Got now we're done.

[C]

Go bollocks. That's your lot. Life, death and a whole lot of. What else do you expect? No regret. Go bollocks. Sit on a bench in loving memory of 1, 2. A mirror ball waltz. Who's next? Let's dance to a summer place let's dance till our memories fade. Every face, every game, every record played down a rabbit hole of golden oldies golden and old and holding little ones at the end.

[B]

Sa.

[C]

White lines A jubilee cat's eyes, Road signs two lies with too little time to regret Too little time but just enough for one more cup of tea One more before we part company. Go Bollocks. That's your lot. It's me or the lorry, she said. Goodbye, Laurie. Goodbye, London. Goodbye, Lester Lattes, Leeds, Colchester, Mackie D's. Goodbye. Tears Go Bollocks. I'll see you next week. If you're still here.

[B]

It.