Short Stuff: The Shortest War

Summary

Short Stuff: The Shortest War

Podcast: Stuff You Should Know
Hosts: Josh and Chuck (with Jerry guest-hosting for Dave)
Release Date: June 18, 2025
Duration: Approximately 13 minutes

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Introduction

In the Short Stuff episode titled "The Shortest War," hosts Josh and Chuck delve into the fascinating history of the Anglo-Zanzibar War, recognized as the shortest war in recorded history. Jerry steps in to fill Dave’s role, ensuring the discussion remains engaging and informative.

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Background: Zanzibar's Strategic Importance

The episode begins with Josh introducing the topic: "the Anglo Zanzibar war," noted for its brevity, lasting between 38 to 45 minutes (00:47). Chuck elaborates on the geopolitical significance of Zanzibar in 1896, explaining that it was a wealthy trading port off the coast of present-day Tanzania. The island was a critical hub for trading ivory, spices, textiles, and, tragically, enslaved Africans—reportedly up to 30,000 people were trafficked through Zanzibar into the 1880s (03:00).

Quote:
Josh: “Zanzibar was a very important place at the time.” (00:47)

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British Interests and the Scramble for Africa

Chuck discusses the British motivations for involvement in Zanzibar, highlighting two main factors:

1. Control of the Expensive Port: Ensuring dominance over a key trading location.
2. Opposition to Slavery: The British were intent on abolishing the slave trade in Africa.

He connects these factors to the broader context of the Scramble for Africa, where European powers divided the continent into zones of influence through treaties and colonization (04:31). This imperialistic maneuvering set the stage for future conflicts and long-term colonization lasting until the 1960s.

Quote:
Chuck: “The British really didn't like this. They wanted to control this really expensive port.” (03:35)

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Installation of a Puppet Sultan and the Succession Crisis

In 1893, Zanzibar became a British protectorate, meaning it was nominally self-ruling but under stringent British control. The British installed Hamad bin Thuwaini as a puppet sultan, ensuring his compliance with British interests. However, his nephew, Khalid bin Barghash, sought to seize the throne, allegedly through assassination attempts on his uncle or cousin (05:38).

Josh elaborates on Barghash’s attempt to overthrow the installed sultan, describing him as unreliable and a threat to British authority.

Quote:
Josh: “They made Zanzibar a British protectorate. They wanted to get a friendly sultan in there.” (04:31)

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The Ultimatum: British Demands and the Clock Ticks Down

On the day of the conflict, Barghash Barghash refused to step down, prompting the British to issue an ultimatum: leave the palace by 9:00 AM or face consequences. Chuck humorously notes the British Consul, Basil Cave, delivered the ultimatum in a typically British manner: “we have no intention of hauling down our flag, and we do not believe you will fire upon us” (09:33).

Quote:
Basil Cave: “We have no intention of hauling down our flag, and we do not believe you will fire upon us.” (09:33)

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The Bombardment: A Swift and One-Sided Conflict

As the clock struck 9:00 AM, the British navy commenced a deluge of artillery fire on the Sultan's palace. Within 38 minutes, the bombardment effectively ended the conflict. Josh recounts how Barghash fled to the German consulate mere minutes into the attack, leaving the British in control (10:15).

Chuck emphasizes the lopsided nature of the casualties: approximately 500 Zanzibaris were killed, while the British sustained virtually no casualties, save for one sailor wounded possibly from accidents onboard warships (10:46).

Quote:
Chuck: “Only one British sailor was wounded even.” (10:56)

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Aftermath: Installation of a New Sultan and Colonial Implications

Following the swift British victory, a new sultan sympathetic to British interests was installed, reinforcing colonial control over Zanzibar. Chuck reflects on the broader implications, noting that this demonstration of British might served as a warning to other East African nations: “these guys will mess you up. They're not messing around” (12:02). This event intensified the Scramble for Africa, with other European powers accelerating their own colonization efforts to avoid being overshadowed.

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Zanzibar's Path to Independence

The episode concludes by tracing Zanzibar's journey post-colonialism. On December 10, 1963, Zanzibar gained full sovereignty and joined the Commonwealth of Nations. Shortly thereafter, it merged with Tanganyika to form the modern nation of Tanzania (12:21). Josh and Chuck express enthusiasm for uncovering more about African history, highlighting the importance of such episodes in educating listeners.

Quote:
Chuck: “Zanzibar was under British control until December 10, 1963, and then they became a fully sovereign state.” (12:21)

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Conclusion

Josh and Chuck wrap up the episode by celebrating Zanzibar's transition to independence and its merger into Tanzania, underlining the significant historical impact of the Anglo-Zanzibar War. They express anticipation for future explorations into African history, recognizing the depth and complexity of the continent’s past.

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Note: Throughout the episode, the hosts intersperse light-hearted conversations and advertisements. However, the core content remains focused on delivering a comprehensive and engaging analysis of the shortest war in history.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Josh (00:47): “Zanzibar was a very important place at the time.”
• Chuck (03:35): “The British really didn't like this. They wanted to control this really expensive port.”
• Josh (04:31): “They made Zanzibar a British protectorate. They wanted to get a friendly sultan in there.”
• Basil Cave (09:33): “We have no intention of hauling down our flag, and we do not believe you will fire upon us.”
• Chuck (10:56): “Only one British sailor was wounded even.”
• Chuck (12:02): “These guys will mess you up. They're not messing around.”
• Chuck (12:21): “Zanzibar was under British control until December 10, 1963, and then they became a fully sovereign state.”

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This comprehensive summary provides an in-depth look at the Anglo-Zanzibar War, capturing the key discussions, historical insights, and conclusions presented by Josh and Chuck. It serves as an informative guide for those unfamiliar with the episode, encapsulating the essence of one of history’s briefest conflicts.

Transcript

[Josh]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Chuck]

Banking with Capital One helps you keep more money in your wallet with no fees or minimums on checking accounts and no overdraft fees. Just ask the Capital One bank guy. It's pretty much all he talks about in a good way. He'd also tell you that this podcast is his favorite podcast too. Thanks, Capital One Bank Guy. What's in your wallet? Terms apply. See capitalone.com bank capital1na member FDIC. Hey, and welcome to the Short Stuff. I'm Josh and there's Chuck. And Jerry's sitting in for Dave. And appropriately, in this short stuff, we're going to talk about the world's shortest war.

[Josh]

That's right. Another Dave Rue special for the shorty. So thanks, Dave, for this.

[Chuck]

Yeah, thanks.

[Josh]

This is about the Anglo Zanzibar war, which is generous to call this a war, but technically it's listed as such. It was really a very quick one sided conflict. So quick it is known as the shortest war. Numbers vary, but you probably see 38 minutes online when you look this thing up. Maybe as high as 45.

[Chuck]

Yeah. But everyone agrees it was less than an hour, this war.

[Josh]

That's right.

[Chuck]

So Anglo Zanzibar means that it was between England and Zanzibar. Appropriately enough, it happened. Did you say in 1896?

[Josh]

I did not mention the date.

[Chuck]

It happened in 1896. And it was between the British Royal Navy and the Sultan of Zanzibar. And you might say, like, what's the deal here? Zanzibar, it's off the coast of Tanzania today. Why would the British Navy care about this? Well, back in the 1890s and before that, Zanzibar was a very important and very wealthy trading port that exchanged goods between the interior of Africa and the rest of the world, Middle East, Europe, so forth. So Zanzibar was a very important place at the time.

[Josh]

I thought it was important because of the great Billy Joel song. Zanzibar.

[Chuck]

For real? Billy Joel did a record on that.

[Josh]

There's a song called Zanzibar. Good song, but I think it's. It's about a bar named Zanzibar.

[Chuck]

Oh, okay. That's a good name for a bar.

[Josh]

Yeah, I like it. I just figured I'd try and work in Billy Joel as much as possible since you didn't know I was a fan.

[Chuck]

Zanzibar? Yeah.

[Josh]

You want to know the lyrics? I'm not going to sing it. I got the old man's car. I got a jazz guitar. I got a tab at Zanzibar tonight. That's where I'll be, I'll be.

[Chuck]

What's the next line then?

[Josh]

That's the chorus. Then it goes into the next verse.

[Chuck]

Okay. When I hear Zanzibar, I think of the GI Joe dreadnoughts. They were in league with cobra. And they were either from Zanzibar or one of them was named Zanzibar.

[Josh]

See, I still never watch that stuff. I missed out.

[Chuck]

They were great, man. I know. You were stuck with the big ones.

[Josh]

Yeah. So where did we leave? It was a busy trading port. Did you mention everything they were trading yet?

[Chuck]

No.

[Josh]

Okay. He left that to me. So they were trading ivory, they were trading spices and things like that. They were getting back weaponry and textiles. But very sadly, one of the biggest exports was enslaved Africans. They estimate up to 30,000 enslaved people were shipped out through Zanzibar. All the way up through the 1880s, by the way, which is almost a couple of decades after the Emancipation Proclamation. That was still going on there. And the sultan of Zanzibar was selling his people out because he was getting rich off of this slave trade.

[Chuck]

Yeah. And the British really didn't like this. They wanted to control this really expensive port. But they were very much driven by outlawing slavery in Africa as well. So those two things were big drivers of Great Britain's interest in Zanzibar. And they, in 1890, came up with a treaty between the British and the Germans. The Germans, sorry. That basically said, here's a bunch of East Africa. This is yours. This is mine. This is yours. It was part of what became known as the scramble for Africa. And the European powers just basically carved the entire continent up. That led to decades of colonization, colonialism that didn't free up until, I guess about the 60s. I think the scramble for Africa deserves its own episode, for sure.

[Josh]

Yeah. Very shameful stuff. But they carved out what they called zones of influence. And they made Zanzibar a British protectorate. Which I looked up the difference between that and a colony. Apparently a protectorate, they're, you know, self ruling and stuff like that. So it's not quite colony, it's colony light. They are still very much under the control of the British government and military. So they said, zanzibar is our protectorate. And we want to get a friendly sultan in there at the sultanate of Zanzibar that's friendly to our needs and wants. And so they picked a guy named Hamad bin Tawaini. And he was basically a puppet. He was the fifth Sultan of Zanzibar. And this was in 1893. But he was not around long because Dave says, here was his nephew. I also saw cousin, this guy, Khalid Ben Bargosh, who had already had one failed run at the sultan ship, I guess, is that what it would be called? Or sultany. And then tried again by almost certainly poisoning and killing either his uncle or cousin Thuwani. Yeah, yeah.

[Chuck]

And one reason that he's a suspect is right when Thuweni died, Ben Bargot showed up in the palace and was like, I'm sultan now. Everybody just wanted to let you know. So you mentioned that Thweney's sultancy lasted only three years. Barghash's sultancy lasted only three days because he installed himself as sultan. And the British were like, we don't like you. You're not going to do our bidding. So we have a problem here.

[Josh]

Yeah. So they said, here's what we're going to do. Actually, let's take a break because everyone's wondering what the heck's going to happen next, right?

[Chuck]

Yes.

[Josh]

All right, we'll be back right after this.

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[Josh]

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[Chuck]

There was this great big head, these big white teeth.

[Jerry]

Radiolab is pulling you back in.

[Josh]

There's just like so much fear building of what's gonna come out of that blue.

[Jerry]

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[Chuck]

Anything you dig down on is fascinating.

[Josh]

These creatures. Wherever you get podcasts S y l y S k S k.

[Chuck]

What stuff you should know.

[Josh]

All Right. So everyone's hanging on the edge of their seat. What are the British going to do? They're going to engage in gunboat diplomacy, which is the very next day. They pulled up a bunch of ships to the harbor there, or whatever it is there, and pointed the cannons at the royal palace and said, you need to be out of there by 9am and we'll just be waiting here to see what you do.

[Chuck]

That's pretty nice. At 9am you can get up early. You could exercise, eat breakfast.

[Josh]

He had plenty of time.

[Chuck]

Yeah. So Bargash was like, I don't think you're going to do that. He decided he was going to call the British's bluff, that they wouldn't fire on their own protectorate. So he brought out his own heavy artillery guns. I think the previous sultan had actually developed a bit of a personal fighting force. So those people showed up. There were thousands of defenders. I saw 1,000. I'm not 100% certain, but there were a bunch of Zanzibar defenders around the palace by 8am on the day that Bargos was supposed to leave.

[Josh]

That's right. And he told the British Consul, Basil Cave, I'm not leaving. And Basil said, well, he said, we have no intention of hauling down our flag, and we do not believe you will fire upon us. And Basil Cave, in the British most British way possible, said, hmm, we'd prefer not to attack, but unless you do as you're told, we shall certainly do so.

[Chuck]

Very nice. You sound like. Again, every time you do a British accent, you sound like Hank Azaria and Mystery Men.

[Josh]

Oh, I love it. I'll take it. Every time.

[Chuck]

The Blue rajah.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Chuck]

So 9:00am happened, and just very promptly, the British started pounding the sultan's palace to dust. They made good on their promise, and they just started firing on it from three warships.

[Josh]

And 38 minutes, by most accounts, is how long that took to completely just. I don't think they destroyed the palace, but they put a hurting on it. Two minutes into this, Barghash literally went out the back door and fled to the German consulate and was like, please help.

[Chuck]

Yeah, he did. And the Germans were like, okay, we'll take care of you. And they smuggled him to Tanzania, or what's now Tanzania. And I guess he lived out his days there. Did you see anything about him after that?

[Josh]

I looked into it, but I don't remember at all. And I was like, why am I bothering with all of this if we're not gonna talk about it?

[Chuck]

Right, sorry. The thing is, one of the Other remarkable aspects of this very, very short, less than an hour war was just how lopsided the casualties were.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Chuck]

So, I mean, it's interesting to talk about now, but 500 Zanzibaris lost their lives.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Chuck]

In less than an hour.

[Josh]

Yeah. I think they just rained down artillery on them and, like, 500 people died very, very quickly. Only one British sailor was wounded even. I think no one died on their side.

[Chuck]

He probably slipped on the deck of a warship and, like, impaled his thigh on his sword.

[Josh]

Yeah, probably.

[Chuck]

That's what I'm guessing happened.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Chuck]

Although I did see British Marines storm the island, so it probably actually happened there.

[Josh]

Yeah. After this, though, they. Because Barghash was gone, they said, all right, well, now we're going to install our own new sultan that we wanted to begin with, that will be sympathetic to our needs and basically do what we say.

[Chuck]

Yes. So there was a. This is a big deal, especially at the time, because it basically showed the other nations of East Africa, like, dude, these guys will mess you up. They're not messing around. They want. They want our land. They want our nations. And that, like I said, really kind of was a flashpoint for the scramble for Africa, because I think also other European powers were like, oh, man, the Brits are going to do that. They're going to take over the entire continent. We better get there as soon as possible.

[Josh]

Yeah. And then, like you mentioned, the 1960s was when a lot of this started unwinding itself. And Zanzimar was one of them under British control until 10 of December 1963. And then they became a fully sovereign state and a member of the Commonwealth of Nations. So good for them.

[Chuck]

Yeah. And the sovereign state thing only lasted a short time because very quickly they merged with. We kept saying, what's now Tanzania. At the time, it was Tanganyika, and they merged with Zanzibar into Tanzania. Isn't that neat?

[Josh]

It's super neat.

[Chuck]

It's a great amalgamation of names.

[Josh]

Yeah. I love it. And just learning more and more about African history is something I did not learn much. Growing up has been a cool part of the show, and I can't wait to learn more.

[Chuck]

Agreed. I think Short Stuff is out.

[Josh]

Stuff youf Should Know is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts, my heart radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever.

[Jerry]

You listen to your favorite shows.

[Chuck]

It.