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- [00:00]
A
The following podcast is a Dear media production. What's up, guys? Welcome back to Sunday Sports Club Podcast, a podcast all about sports told by a woman. And that woman is me. Hi, guys. I'm your host, Allison Cooch. And I literally just talked about this in my last episode that I want to take out the all about sports. Because I'm like, sometimes it's not about sports, sometimes it's just about stuff that I want to talk about. And today's that is one of those episodes. Today I'd like to welcome my guest, Lucy Fellow.
- [00:31]
B
Think hello.
- [00:32]
A
Is the CEO of her own media company, host of the Real Stuff pod, wife and mother of two. Am I missing anything?
- [00:41]
B
Wow, what an intro. I think content creator, but people probably could gauge that already. And that's about it. You captured everything.
- [00:51]
A
Do you get specific when it comes to being called an influencer or content creator?
- [00:56]
B
Yeah, because, I mean, I. I do operate as a standard influencer and that is how I make. A majority of my income is through brand deals. But from the very start of my career, which goes back to Refinery29 and YouTube and video content, I fully embraced being a content creator. Actually, being a video producer was the main title I gave myself. And the influencer stuff just kind of happened. Like, that was the natural progression of the YouTuber pipeline, but it was never really my intention. And even to this day, it's still lucrative in the background, but not really where I'm intending to go with my career.
- [01:37]
A
I kind of love that I. I get pretty specific when, when, say, when people say, oh, you're an influencer, I'm like, that's not my goal. Like, I think my goal is like, storytelling and entertainment and, I don't know, just so many other things. And I do think that there is a traditional influencer, if that makes sense, like LTK and like promoting sales. I think that they can be very different.
- [02:00]
B
Totally. And I've now been on many trips and met many influencers like that. And we have a very different structure to our business. We approach content differently. And not that this matters because whatever. Anyone could put whatever they want in their bio, but I did just recently change my bio. You know the subheader where you can put what you are. It used to say digital creator, and I just changed it to artist because I'm like, I'm heading in a little bit of a different direction. My followers know I'm attempting to write a psychological thriller novel this year. Getting into poetry and I don't know, I just. With the way I edit my Videos and the storytelling and all of it. It feels more like art to me than, like, influencing.
- [02:43]
A
I love that. And I feel like you can, in this career, kind of, like, brand yourself, like, and if you're not going the way that you're intending, you can always, like, redirect, which is kind of the beauty of what we do.
- [02:54]
B
No, the best thing about this job is truly that you build an audience around you and they maybe come for one thing or they found you somehow. But I always tell my followers I feel like I could totally change course tomorrow. I could wake up and be like, I think I want to train for NASA now and go to space. And they would just be there and follow along, and all my content can become space content. I could become a space channel. I could be broadcasting from not here, and people would still be there, which is really cool. And that's. That doesn't happen in every field, obviously.
- [03:26]
A
Absolutely. I'm gonna keep my eye out for you.
- [03:30]
B
You might see me floating up in the atmosphere one of these days.
- [03:33]
A
For anybody listening who knows you from social media but doesn't know your full story, how would you describe your life right now?
- [03:42]
B
Oof. While I'm in. I'm in kind of like the settle down in life phase, I'm in a very similar place to you. But my followers really started following me when I was in my early 20s, and even if I go back before that, like the start of the career, I went to Johns Hopkins University as a neuroscience major and was very much intending to become a doctor, and then somehow became a YouTuber out of that. And I launched a show on the YouTube channel for the admissions office at the school. And that kind of kickstarted my extracurriculars, leading to job opportunities, which then led me to Refinery 29, which is my second job out of college. And I got to host and produce their YouTube content and grow my following kind of on the backbone of their audience. And really my followers started there, which was my living in New York City. I was dating my now husband because he was my high school boyfriend. So I've been with him through all of this. But I was in my early 20s. My content was a lot different. It was very much like, experimental, not clickbait, but just like kitschy challenges. That kind of whatever was trending on YouTube in 2015, 2016, and then through life, you know, they really saw me through engagement, marriage, one kid, two kids, moving to the suburbs, settling down, life changing. And now I'm in this kind of new phase where the content is it's still very lifestyle, but especially with the addition of my podcast, where I'm kind of getting into more deep, going deeper on some more taboo topics and just diving into. I'm also really expanding into the education arm of my business. So I teach, I coach and I run courses and teach people how to show up on social media and how to make content for Instagram, YouTube. And so my content is kind of becoming a little bit more about teaching people how to exercise their creativity and how to make things and use the tools of digital media to do that. Working with a lot of brands these days that are for makers and creators, as opposed to a lot of, you know, fashion, beauty brands, which I still love, but I'm just finding my contents leaning more towards creative. And I guess the place I'm in right now, kids are growing up. I mean, I still have a one year old and a four year old, but everyone's growing up. No, they're still babies. But things are moving fast and our life is changing a lot right now. I still haven't even shared this on my social, but my husband recently left his job and we're now sort of starting to work together. He's doing some of his own things too, but he's also joining in in different ways with my business. And so we're just restructuring life right now and kind of having a new approach to work and life, which is exciting.
- [06:35]
A
Working with your husband is a blessing and also can be like, okay, we can't be talking about work when we're laying in bed at 9pm so wait,
- [06:46]
B
you guys work together and what does he do with you?
- [06:50]
A
Yeah, so we. It's really interesting because my husband started off in the NFL and then I kind of created content around that. And then he. Once he retired from the NFL or even before he retired, we started making content together, but we had our own platforms, so I feel like it was. I would ask for his help when it came to creating videos and vice versa, but we still had our own identity, which I really valued. Um, and then we start. We have Airbnbs that we both have worked on. We've learned a lot, but we have learned that setting healthy boundaries is very important when it comes to working with your spouse.
- [07:30]
B
So mine's definitely going to be way different because my husband has no interest in being in the content.
- [07:35]
A
Okay, very.
- [07:36]
B
As much as I pull him to and as much as my audience loves him, like, he's been on my podcast a couple times and anytime he's there, it's obviously the Top episode. So people want him, but he's just more of an introvert, doesn't love it, has been supportive of me since high school, but is kind of like, this is your thing. So when I bring him in to my side and my business, it's more on the back end, structurally, business. He has a very different brain and thinks I make moves really quickly. I come up with an idea, I do it, the video's done, it's posted the same day. And he is strategic and slow and likes to look at things and think about things, which sometimes doesn't work for this industry, but also sometimes is so smart. And when we sit down and have a meeting about things, he really helps me think big picture, long term. He's pretty much built my financial tracker system for the past seven years of my business. But just this year, now that he's been off his other job, he built this insanely elaborate. I just did a podcast episode about my 13 different revenue streams as a creator and they're really hard to track, I'm sure. And he created this crazy system with all these tabs and something I just, you know, I don't have Excel knowledge. But he has figured out how to input these formulas and it's super easy to see. Money in, money out. Profitability gives me a chart. And I, I love, I've been really in A zone. 2025 for me was like a build up the business zone. And I'm so obsessed with putting systems in place and opening these new revenue streams where I can. I might be spending a lot and investing in them, but I'm clearly earning more than I'm spending every month and that's all I care about. So it's, it's been so fun, but very different from years past where it was just like 90% of my income is only brand deals and that's all I'm doing.
- [09:31]
A
Well, it sounds like you guys are playing off of like both of your strengths versus you guys like aren't competing with one another, which I think is also very important when it comes to working with a spouse. It's like me and my husband don't have the same goals, but we might be doing similar things, but we definitely have different strengths, different weaknesses, and I think we balance each other out, which is very important.
- [09:53]
B
Yes, I agree. So you guys don't feel like your platforms are competing, but they work in tandem?
- [09:59]
A
Absolutely. I think something probably in the content creator space. And this would be interesting to get your take as somebody who like coaches people on to like train People on social media tactics is that when we first started content creating, I thought, oh, we should do a couple's channel. And he was like, no, because if you want to work with a makeup brand and I don't want that on like our channel, like we should keep us ourselves very separately. And now, I mean, I don't know how long we've been doing this. Maybe like six, seven years. I'm so grateful that we kept it separate because he's on more of like sports broadcasting, very like analytical, working with companies that are surrounding fitness and I'm more like lifestyle motherhood. And it just feels like very different sectors.
- [10:46]
B
I think that's probably a smart move. Although the workaround would be creating a new revenue stream that is the couple's channel, but still keeping the separate channels alive. I love that.
- [10:57]
A
I'm like, there's, there's plans in place.
- [10:59]
B
Yes, you could def. If you have enough time. I mean, I know you have kids, but like, if you have enough time, you could start a third channel that's just for that and find only applicable collaborations that make sense for both of you. But then very much keep what you're doing.
- [11:15]
A
Love that. Well, you've lived a lot of different lives in your adulthood, it seems. When you look at this current chapter, what feels the most different from the Lucy you were like five or 10 years ago?
- [11:30]
B
I think it's probably just the depth of the connection that I'm trying to feel with the audience. When I really think about my older content. It was a lot of I'm playing into the YouTube algorithm. I really want to get a wow, I'm trying a lifestyle challenge. And most of the comments that came in while they were very fandom based, you know, it was a lot of Lucy's back first, first. Like everyone wants to be the first to comment and they're part of the community, but it was really just surface level comments of I love you, I love this series. More episodes. When's the next episode coming out? And it was. I didn't know who anyone was that was following the show. It was just a lot of young girls and today, I mean, I'm sure you can relate to this, but it's just the deep emails that come in and the DMs, the hefty DMs that are not that I'm doing. You know, I chose not to be a neurosurgeon, so I'm not curing brain cancer or saving the world with what I'm doing. But you really do see how Shining your light and just showing up on social media and being authentic and opening up about things that are not so great and giving people permission to do that and hosting hard conversations so people feel less alone with whatever they're dealing with. Like, it actually makes such a big difference for people. And most people see it. Even the people who are impacted so much, they just don't ever tell you. But then the people who do tell you send these incredibly rich messages that are. That's it for me. It's like, obviously it's not like I read one of those and I'm like, okay, I'm done closing up shop. I did my job. But the fact that those come in every week is just so different from how it was years ago. And it's probably a testament to the way the content has just gotten. Not only just the content changing, but I guess I've aged. So I'm just aging in real time and the content's reflecting that and people are feeling it more than previously.
- [13:30]
A
Absolutely. It's almost like, I think as like maturing in the content space is realizing, like, it's not just the views. It's not just like the numbers. It's more so like connecting with your community and connecting back and like knowing you're actually making a difference, whatever you want that difference to look like. And I think that's like a, like almost maturing, like, in this job.
- [13:56]
B
I agree with your podcast. So this is. Correct me if I'm wrong. Is this your first non sports episode?
- [14:03]
A
No, I do a lot of non sports episodes, but sometimes I'll try and tie it back. But I think more recently this year, I'm just like, I'm so multifaceted. My husband is a sports broadcaster, so I'm like, my life is always going to, like, entail with sports. He played in the NFL for seven years, but now I'm just like, oh, well, like, yeah, my life is sports. So, like, I don't feel like my episodes need to, like, relate back to sports every single time.
- [14:28]
B
And were you an athlete?
- [14:30]
A
I was in college. But like, more so I just was all about, like, the NFL lifestyle. My wall. My husband played in the NFL. I just took people, like, behind the scenes. I worked a lot with the NFL and other like, sports companies and kind of like invited people to see that. And now that he's retired, it's like, still inviting people into the sports world, but in a different way.
- [14:55]
B
Got it. So you. Even though I feel like I'm. I naturally start interviewing people. I'm sorry I know I'm a guest on your show. I want to understand you. I need to understand this. So because you wanted to keep your platform separate from him, you wanted to have your own thing, but you still made your podcast about sports, but that wasn't just because of him.
- [15:16]
A
Yes.
- [15:17]
B
Got it.
- [15:18]
A
Yeah, it's. It's crazy. I think I've always, like, loved sports, and I've always, like, had. In fact, in college, there was a period of time where I was like, oh, I want to be a sports broadcaster. Like, I want to be on the field. And. And then with my husband's job, it just, like, happened to transform that. I was always around sports, and I was talking about it, and it just became such a natural, like, oh, I'm interested in this. I love it. Also. My husband is, like, in it too, so it kind of helps. And it's kind of like I used him a little bit, but in a good way.
- [15:48]
B
I mean, I love it. Let's take what. Take what we have and make it big.
- [15:53]
A
Yeah. But it's interesting. When my husband retired from the NFL, it was two weeks before I gave birth to my daughter. And so it was a very natural transition where people watched us throughout, like, his sports career. And then it naturally transitioned into, oh, well, now we're a family. And, like, come and see an insight into our family. And you're also a mom of two. How did becoming a mom the second time change things compared to the first?
- [16:21]
B
First time, for me, as my followers know, was a lot more intense and a lot rougher than I thought it was gonna be. I was also the first one of my friends, first one in our family. Both of my kids were, like the first set of grandkids. And so I don't know what I thought. I guess I had seen people around the world having kids and always loved kids, was always obsessed with babies. Anytime I was going somewhere to meet someone's baby, which was always distant, people's babies. Cause there weren't a lot in my family. It was just Christmas morning for me just to get to go be with a baby. And I think I would only see the good, cuddly, lovely parts of it. And it's just so underrated. As the mom, I always say this to people. It's so underrated that when we finally get our babies, if we were the ones who birthed them, that like that first week, first two weeks, first six fucking months. Can I curse on here? Yeah. Those first six months postpartum, to be feeling the way you feel after you've just gone through pregnancy and had a baby in whatever way, even if it was a great birth, which both of mine were, you still are sore and uncomfortable and hormonal and crazy. And the fact that that has to be the state you're in when you get to have the baby is so unfortunate. It's like you finally have this baby, you've hyped up what it's going to be like, but boom, you are ill and unwell and emotionally, you are the worst version of yourself that you could possibly be. And listen, some people just revel in that whole thing, the whole birth, the bliss, the bubble, whatever. For me, even on the back of a great pregnancy, aside from nausea, but just like a healthy pregnancy, a healthy labor and delivery, a pretty good labor and delivery with very minimal tearing, everything going well. I still came home and was just like, I'm not myself right now and I can't sit on the couch. And now everything's all different. And also, my first came three weeks early, so it was a little bit abrupt for the first and I wasn't fully ready. I hadn't finished up my projects that I wanted to close. So I was a little stressed about everything. And just having a baby did not feel as light and joyous and bubbly as I thought. I think it was just an expectations versus reality issue and just had so many learnings and definitely had baby blues. I don't think it was postpartum depression, but heavy baby blues. A winter baby, lots of darkness, sun setting early, crying, being so confused what was happening. And with my second, it was just a lot smoother because my expectations were six feet underground. And it was just, I've been here, I've done this, and everything was relatively like I thought it would be or a little bit better. And actually my second baby was just a little bit. Had a. Actually, in hindsight, she had some more issues. I was gonna say she was easier in that my first was. Had a lot of gas, colicky things, and my second didn't. But she had her own fair share of stuff. She had a. A tongue tie, she got thrush. We had like a whole bunch of random things that if that had happened with my first, it would have been a monster of a problem. Right. And with her it was just like, okay, we're dealing with it. We know she's going to be okay. So not everything was as big of a deal. So the second time I made a whole podcast about how transitioning from 2:1 to 2 was easier for me than 0 to 1 and I even invited audience callers on and got different people's opinions on it. And I have some theories about who, what type of people feel different ways in that debate.
- [20:12]
A
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- [26:12]
B
Are you pregnant or are you.
- [26:14]
A
Yeah. Okay, so I am pregnant with my second daughter and I. I'm super curious because I feel like when you're in this space, not all the time, but I feel like a. A large part of the time, you can pretty much put an. A lot of. You can put a lot of your identity in your work. And so for me, going from. I think going from zero to one is going to be harder than me going from one to two. Now I'm not there, but I think it was just such a life shift that I'm like, I, like, don't get to do whatever I want anymore. And going into having a second, I'm like, okay, I already have one. I already divide my time. Like, I already know. Like, okay, like, I'm gonna have to set aside time if I want to work. Like, I love working and I love. I find a lot of, like, enjoyment in that. I'm gonna have to set that, that time aside. And I think knowing that is our. I'm already more prepared.
- [27:11]
B
How was your transition from zero to one?
- [27:14]
A
Horrible?
- [27:15]
B
Okay, so then you're. You want me to tell you my theory because you'll be happy.
- [27:19]
A
Yes.
- [27:20]
B
Okay, so here's my theory. And listen, maybe you'll prove me wrong. Send me a DM if I'm wrong. But from everyone I interviewed and the people I spoke to, here's how it goes. If you're one of those people who felt like zero to one was a breeze, you just embraced every second of it. It was beautiful. It was amazing. You thought it was so easy. Your life didn't change at all. It was amazing. Clearly, that means, like, emotionally you were fine with the transition into motherhood. And physically, you're kind of saying that it's kind of easy physically to manage one. It was easy. People that feel that way, I think often one to two is the rude awakening for them because they were not thinking because all they're focusing on is the physical. And of course, it gets harder with two. Then you have to manage splitting time, and no parent gets any free time because it's either you're with one or the other, or you're leaving one parent with both of them. And it's physically just double the kids to care for.
- [28:25]
A
Yes.
- [28:26]
B
For the people who went from zero to one and felt identity crisis, oh, my gosh, this screwed up. Like, I'm so confused with my life. Did I make a mistake? But I obviously love this baby. But what's going on? This is crazy. It shattered my world, and now I'm finally falling into my rhythm. They have their second, and of course, physically, it's still harder. Like, it's still two babies versus one, but they're not thinking about the physical. They're just focusing on, is this rocking my world? And it's not rocking their world. So they are always like, oh, going from one to two. Yeah, it's more work, but it's fine. And that's the category I fell into. Sounds like that's gonna be your opinion.
- [29:07]
A
I'm just like, there is no way, like, what happened the first time can happen the second. I'm. I'm almost preparing, like, for it to happen in the event that it happens. And it's like, I. My first postpartum, I was re. Hospitalized. We moved three times while I was in the first six months postpartum, I'm like, I'm gonna sit in my backyard in this newly renovated house, and I'm just going to, you know what? Whatever happens, happens. And I'm like, there. There's no way this baby can rock me now. I'm gonna knock on wood right now because there's definitely a chance, but I'm preparing for the worst.
- [29:47]
B
Yes.
- [29:47]
A
And in the event that the worst happens, I'll already be prepared for it.
- [29:51]
B
I think you're going to be pleasantly. I think we're going to have a similar situation. And you are just. It really is one of those cases of nothing can compare to the lifestyle change of the first. And for me, I'm just like, what you said. I love working. I feel so creatively lit up by work and having the time and ability to do that. Makes me be a better parent. And it's the days that I try to cut off my work schedule to be a parent that I just feel like I'm not in my element as a mom.
- [30:24]
A
Yep.
- [30:25]
B
And when I first had my. When I had my first. I remember before he was born, starting to think about how it would be once I had a kid. Cause my mom was a stay at home mom.
- [30:38]
A
Okay.
- [30:39]
B
And I never thought I was gonna be that. I never thought I would. But I think there was a part of me, especially in the days of being super busy building my platform when I was getting a little burnt out. I remember thinking about at the time, which I had a baby and feeling like, wouldn't it be kind of nice if I have a baby and maybe I'll just like not care about this anymore. Maybe I'll become one of those moms who's just. I don't want. I don't have any other passion. But my passion is mom life. And then I can put all the energy I'm putting into this into like craft projects and homemaking. And when that I feel that feels kind of nice. Not that it's not a hard job to be a stay at home mom, but it would just be nice if my brain would kind of decide and pick. I want to go all in on this and then I'll be the world's best stay at home mom.
- [31:29]
A
Yes.
- [31:30]
B
And not that I actually. Especially because I was building my business and not that I actually thought that would happen, but there was definitely a part of me that felt like that would be kind of nice if I could just decide.
- [31:42]
A
Yes.
- [31:43]
B
And then he was born and I took a few months of maternity leave. And then I got a part time nanny when I returned to work because I was like, I think I'm gonna try to do this half and half thing. And we had a three day a week nanny and all like some moms at that stage are like, all I want to do is be with my baby and I'm gonna quit the job. They don't want to go to work. They're crying when they have to return to work. And I, of course it sounds so weird when I say it because it's not like I didn't want to be with my baby. But I found for whatever reason that I was being pulled towards being creative and doing passion stuff throughout a typical work week. And it was just the days that I was not scheduled to work. I had so many things in my head that I wanted to do and so many projects. I was working on that I wanted to be able to do alongside being a mom, but I just couldn't do it the way I set up my days. And just my brain went the complete opposite direction. It was like I had the baby and I was like, wait, I want to dive into this business so far. And so then the structure changed and by the time I had my second, we were in such a good. I mean, my son's now older. He is in a preschool five days a week for half the day. But I just, by the time I had my second, it's like we have a full school schedule for our older one and a five day a week nanny for the younger one. And I also work from home, so I'm very much there. It's not like I'm literally leaving all day and not seeing my kids. I see them all day and every time they come home, my office is right off the kitchen behind a glass door with no lock. So I see them more than the average parent.
- [33:22]
A
Yep.
- [33:23]
B
But I'm very much working. I'm carving out the time to do things for myself and creative projects. And then in the time that I'm with them, I just feel like I'm so much better.
- [33:35]
A
It's. I, I think you and I are similar in that way that I definitely was curious, like, oh, when my daughter gets here, am I going to feel like, like work? I don't, like, I'm not looking forward to doing, you know, all the projects I used to do. Am I, am I dreading doing that? Am I like, while working, am I thinking, dang, I'd rather, I'd rather go and do something else? And I quickly found that like, what I do for work and not everybody feels this way, but what I do like, really fills my cup and that makes me so happy. I almost feel like it makes me a better mom because I'm like taking time for myself and like instead of having a hobby, like, well, I mean, I guess this, it was a hobby turned into work, but like storytelling and making videos and like all of these other projects that I have. Like, it, it makes me so happy that I feel like it fills my cup and then I'm able to pour back into my family. And for so long I had this idea that I couldn't have both.
- [34:33]
B
Right. Same. And I fully align with that. I just feel that's exactly what it is. It's that I'm filling my cup and then I can pour back and there's no. I don't know, I totally understand when Parents have the opposite effect and they don't wanna go to work. And in that case, I think the difference is maybe not everyone's work is something they're so passionately drawn to, but a lot of times it's just work, you know, which a lot of people can't, obviously can't afford to not work and to just be a stay at home parent. Like there's a lot of dynamics and. But in my case, I have the choice to do either and I'm choosing to work because I want, I really enjoy it and I love showing my kids what I'm working on and I love telling them that I'm making movies and then they want to watch it. And I just love showing them an example, at least in our household, of a woman who is running the business. And I just, I love that because my, my son's in the stage of starting to say, oh, you're gross, you're a girl. And I've been making him repeat the mantras, women run the world. I'm like going through all these lines with him because all the kids in his class, it really is weird. They're four and they segment into boy, boys and girls, which is crazy. Crazy.
- [35:57]
A
And then obviously your, your family is such a big part of your life. How do you mean? How do you maintain privacy for your family while sharing your life on the Internet?
- [36:07]
B
Yeah. So my husband and I went back and forth a lot before we had our first kid of, you know, are we going to show them or we're not going to show them. And we just had so many conversations about it and we just came out on the side of we a hundred percent have no risk of becoming like a family channel. Not only does my husband not want that, but he's also super. I don't even think he's would be happy if my kids wanted to get into like acting or anything public, which is, I don't know, I don't know if I agree with that because obviously that's my calling. But he is just more, you know, I want everyone to have a normal life and normal everything. And I'm, I'm fully on board with that. But given the nature of what I do, I felt like it was hard for me to physically hide them. And obviously over time I've come up with a lot of tactics, a lot of ways to not have. I think my main thing has always been I don't want someone to go to my Instagram and have the face like the main faces that jump out at them being My kids faces, which is the case on a lot of my personal, like in real life, friends, Facebook, who are not influencers.
- [37:17]
A
Right.
- [37:18]
B
But I just don't want their faces to jump out. It's not that I don't want it to look like I don't have a kid, but I just don't want their faces to be the number one thing. But I also don't have a problem with their faces being something people know what it looks like, as long as it's just not everywhere all the time and in everyone's face. So I feel like I'm just very. Especially as they get older, I'm pretty sparing with how often I'm showing their faces wherever I can. I try to shoot them from the back or the side or there have been like a couple of brand partnerships that are for kids products, whether it's a kid's clothes or toys or something that I've explicitly asked if I cannot have their face in. And their brand has pushed back and been like, it's an ad for kid clothes, so we need their face. And in those cases, my husband and I will have a conversation of like, let's discuss how we feel as the parents making the decision for this kid. If we think about having their faces aligned with this brand in this advertisement in this way is a net positive for us as a family or has any ramifications. And for the most part, these brands are like organic, cotton, sustainable kids clothes. Like, I'm more than happy to have them be an ambassador for that. But I think we would just think through every opportunity that came individually and yeah, that's. I'm sort of at a stage where I don't think about it. I used to think about this all the time. Like this used to be my daily struggle. Like, should I cut them out? Should I delete everything? And I genuinely just don't think about it. And as my content has evolved, people have stopped even really asking about it.
- [38:56]
A
Yeah, I think that's where almost I wish I never would have spoke about like sharing or not sharing, like even that decision in general. Because I feel like that almost drew attention to it. And that way I was like, okay, like, I want my daughter to be private, but not a secret. Like, I'm still a mom. I'm still going to make content about being a mom. Like, you're gonna see her in the background, what have you not? And then it became like a game for people are like, I see her at this amount of seconds in the background, the corner of her face I see her, I'm like, okay, hold on. And it's like almost like that is the obsession I was trying to prevent.
- [39:34]
B
Yes.
- [39:34]
A
And so now I don't even address it. I'm like, if she's in the background, like, like as long as I'm not making content, like, hey, this is my two year old's day in the life routine. Here's how waking up in the morning, this is her cereal. She' like all of that. I'm like, I'm protecting her privacy, but she's definitely not a secret. And I feel like I have found like a happy medium of like where my husband and I are very comfortable with.
- [40:00]
B
Totally. And so you do mostly side back stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [40:04]
A
And like, if I post a picture, like, I try and make it funny because I feel like I try and find like the comedic side of social media. So I'm like, oh, I'll put my husband's like png over her face and like try and make a joke of it. But it's, it's almost like if I put like this big ass emoji, I'm like, am I drawing more attention? Probably.
- [40:24]
B
I had a theory that when people put emojis that, especially with the way on Instagram, unless you actually put the emoji and then save the image and then re upload it with the emoji embedded, there's software for people to just download the photo without any overlays. And I mean, I try to tell my friends this because they do a lot of that on their stories with like hearts over a naked body part at the beach or something.
- [40:48]
A
I know.
- [40:49]
B
No. Oh my gosh. Yeah. I mean, goes without saying. Should have even said this earlier. I think the number one thing that I think about every time I post is, is this inappropriate? Is. There's obviously never anything that is not appropriate, could be misconstrued, could be taken and used in a weird sexual way, or is even anything that's somewhat embarrassing for them as they get older? Like, we don't really. I don't talk too much about potty stuff or, you know, if my son ever had an accident overnight, I would never make content about that.
- [41:23]
A
Right.
- [41:24]
B
That kind of stuff is like off limits. And I just, I also don't feel like my content is enough. I'm not enough of a mom, blogger, vlogger person for people to be coming to my platform for advice and tips on that kind of stuff.
- [41:37]
A
Mm.
- [41:37]
B
So that just sort of stays out. And I feel good about that.
- [41:41]
A
But I'm Like, I'm already embarrassing her enough. I like, leaving my footprint. Like, the videos I have from, like, five years ago, I'm like, that's already embarrassing.
- [41:49]
B
Oh, yeah. I mean, I already have. I just was thinking about this the other day. Oh, no, you know what? It was okay. I was looking at your post about People magazine. Mm. Whatever they said about you.
- [42:02]
A
They said they, like, just documented that I said I wanted a boob job
- [42:05]
B
after I was having kids, so same thing happened to me. I. I think it was People. I have to go look. No, maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was, like, Daily Mail or something like that. But it was after a podcast episode I recorded with someone where we were talking about in context. What we were talking about was sex postpartum and how, like, sex has gotten more enjoyable and more pleasurable. And I think I said something about just how it was, like, easier to have sex now, like, physically. And next thing you know, there's this headline, Daily Mail, and it's literally like, woman age 33 says women age 33 claims her birth stretched her vagina and enhanced improved sex. Like, something like that. And I'm like, are you kidding? This is what you pulled out of this interview and blasted. And also, it's a taboo topic show. It was supposed to be for the purpose of comfort and enter, you know, women aligning with, like, thankfully, we're talking about these women's health issues. But it was taken so wildly out of context.
- [43:17]
A
I love when that happens. I'm just like. I'm like, there are so many other things happening in the world. Like, maybe we shouldn't, like, me wanting a boob job. Like, yes, I want a boob job. Should I make an entire video about it? Sure. Like, let's go ahead and do it. I think they took it out of. I think I said something on, like, an Instagram story, and I was like, oh, my God, I can't wait to get these stacky things fixed. I'm like, we don't need to document the.
- [43:39]
B
Like, you never know who's watching these things. That's scary. Oh, God.
- [43:45]
A
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And Quints works directly with safe ethical factories and cuts out the middleman so that you're not paying for brand markup, just high quality clothing. Quince uses the highest quality materials like 100 European linen and organic cotton. Everything is built to hold up season after season. The stitching, the fit, the fabrics, the pieces that you'll reach for over and over. So refresh your wardrobe with quince. Go to quince.com sundae for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com Sunday to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com Sunday I feel like ever since having kids I'VE definitely changed. Not only in this plastic surgery that I want, but I just feel like also like the projects and work that I want to take on and like, I feel like I look for more fulfilling things these days just because I like, oh, the purpose that I'm trying to go for. Like what, what is that? And you've talked a lot about ambition evolving. So how would you describe what ambition looks like for you now versus in your 20s?
- [49:43]
B
It's definitely kind of like what you said. I'm thinking a lot more about legacy projects and especially in the 20s, my 20s and my even like later 20s when I was really heavy on the influencer train. It's just kind of like a churn and burn of brands and partnerships and just a lot of little things happening all the time. There was one year where my brand partnerships tracker, I think I did like 95 deals in a year.
- [50:15]
A
Insane.
- [50:16]
B
And it was like some of them were bigger and better and longer term and the others were just like one story, one story, quick, quick, quick. And at some point I had this, it must have been in 2025. I just had this epiphany moment of I would literally rather have one good brand deal a month than be doing five to ten little mini things all over here. And if that means that I'm actually making less money overall through brand deals, then that's fine. I'm opening up other revenue streams and I can start transitioning a little out of that. But you probably see it now. There's just so many new, not necessarily younger, but new creators on the scene who are very much just entering that phase one of the brand deal craze. And I'm like, not really part of it and I feel fine about it. And I've been getting a few really good deals that I'm so excited and passionate about and I'm not seeing as many of the little mini things, which my manager is telling me is likely a byproduct of me having been working with brands for the past decade and them starting to go with fresher new creators. But it's almost like that's not the direction I want to go in anyway. So I'm always happy to do a small one off deal with a brand that I love. But almost all my deals right now are long term, spanning across all of Q1, multiple pieces of content, and for causes. And with brands that I just feel are really good and are kind of the way I gauge it is like, is there any reason for someone in my audience to say this was A bad idea. And almost everything I'm working on, I'm just like, no, these are all just good quality brands that have been around forever, that I've known about since I was young. Big, good brands.
- [52:10]
A
Yes. I think it's. That's also a part of, like, the. You go through, like, ebbs and flows in this content creator space. And I, at one point was like, why would I ever say no to anything? And now that I've been in it for six, seven years, I'm like, oh, I say no more than I say yes, 100 favorite part. And it's. It's being able to be like, no, I don't align with that brand. I'm not going to work with that brand. Like, I'm not going to promote that. And I think that saves space. It's also coming from a place of, like, I've worked my ass off to get to this point, but I'm able to save space for, like, the bigger projects that I want to do. Whereas in. If I'm taking every single little deal, even though I might not align with that brand, it's like, oh, then I look up and I'm like, oh, I don't even have a lot of time for the other things that I'm passionate about. And being a mom, I'm also like, I'm preserving, like, my peace because I'm like, I. At the same time, like, I want to be a very present mom and I don't want to go home drained to my child, which is definitely a privilege, especially when it comes to, like, me being able to work from home. But it didn't. I didn't. Wasn't like this, like, from the jump fully.
- [53:24]
B
And I've also proven to myself time and time again, it's almost a game now where it's like, when something comes in, that's a pretty big number, but I just know it's not right. And I say no. And I say it with such confidence. I'm just like, unfortunately, it's a no. And it's not always because it's a bad brand that I think people are gonna give me pushback on sometimes. It's just, I genuinely don't want that product. And like, one. One of the recent ones was a. It was an $8,000 offer for, like, one story set about this, some sort of smart toaster thing. And I was just like, I love my Our Place air fryer. I already. My followers know I have my Smeg 4 toast toaster. I truly don't have room on my counter for another appliance. And what am I gonna do? Like, pop it out every time I'm filming in the kitchen so it looks like it's still there. Like, people catch on to these things, and I just don't want it in my energetic space. So I said no. And I was just like, this is such a cool product. I'm sure someone wants it. It's going to be a no. And at this point, I now wait because usually within 24 hours, something comes in the inbox that's double the size for a brand I love. And I have just created the physical space for it. And it's truly a game where I just wait. I'm like, I said no. I'm waiting for my yes, and something happens, and it's really exciting.
- [54:47]
A
You're really good at manifesting yes.
- [54:50]
B
Manifesting a yes. By saying no, you're like, no.
- [54:53]
A
I'm planning on a deal with our place coming through in, like, the next 24 hours. So, like, don't. Don't even worry about it.
- [54:58]
B
Do you also. Do you use Shop My?
- [55:01]
A
Oh, my God, I love Shop My. Honestly, for a while, I took a step back from ltk, but now I do both, which is time consuming. But I love working with, like, brands that I love through, like, these platforms.
- [55:16]
B
Yeah. So I love Shop My. And they give a lot of gifting requests, as you know.
- [55:22]
A
Yes.
- [55:23]
B
And like, almost every day, there's like, 10 new requests, products, whatever. And the way it's now working is if I. Let's say I'm running low on white T shirts and I feel like I need white T shirts, or if I'm in need of a new mascara or whatever it is I need, All I have to do is say it to my husband out loud. I say, I'm thinking of getting a new mascara or could really use some new boots, some new white T shirts, whatever. I swear to God, within one to two weeks, there's a request in my Shop my to gift me exactly what I've said I need. It's now become a running joke.
- [55:56]
A
I'm like, I need you to write a book on that because that's impressive.
- [56:01]
B
It's like the exact products I need. Just come in and I'm like, this is crazy.
- [56:06]
A
Well, with. With, like, maturing in this space or even just, like, evolving as a content creator, do you feel like you struggle now with the guilt of wanting more professionally while also wanting to be very present as a mom, or do you think you've kind of found the balance?
- [56:22]
B
It's never really. It never really feels perfect. And honestly, I just recorded a podcast episode about this, where in I know you don't have a cycle right now being pregnant, but in my normal life, period cycle, my whole life is a cycle. Every month is cyclical, where the first couple weeks I'm supercharged creatively and I open a million new projects and have a lot of stuff going on, and I'm shooting and I'm editing, I'm feeling really busy. And then the last couple weeks are slower and I feel not inspired to start new stuff. And I'm just kind of giving myself time to rest. And it's not that in those first two weeks I never see my kids, or in those second two weeks I'm not doing any work, but it's more like energetically. That's kind of how my attention shifts from week to week in a month. And of course, every day is pretty much structured with when the kids leave to go off to school or what time I stop work to start, dinner, bedtime, bath time routine, all that. And then we have built in set days of the week when grandparents come and there's just like other things happening around the house all week. But for the most part, those first two weeks, I just feel so supercharged that I'm very busy doing stuff. Usually those will be the weeks that after I put the kids to bed, I'll maybe go back and finish something or work on something. And the other weeks it's like I'm. Sometimes I'll just finish work a little early, join with what's happening in the house, and then totally spend the night just vegging.
- [57:53]
A
So you're saying there's like a lot of ebbs and flows when it comes to how much you're putting towards work versus, like, how much you're putting towards your family.
- [58:01]
B
It's definitely not like at the end of every night, I could tell you if that day felt like it was a work heavy day or more of like a family personal heavy day, and which work and personal end up being kind of the same bucket that I'm filling. But some other days it's like there's less happening at work and I can maybe use that to like, do something for myself or just be kid heavy. And it's usually the end of the day I could tell which direction that swung in. But it's not like every single day. I just feel like I'm striking this perfect balance all the time, right?
- [58:35]
A
Absolutely. If you could talk to the version of yourself who was chasing everything all at once. What would you tell her now?
- [58:44]
B
I think that version of myself was kind of the up and coming creator who, for a hot second there was just a lot as kind of going through the fire of building a brand and starting to show up online and getting a lot of people seeing you for the first time and having to kind of deal with, well, if I want to do this, if I want to build this brand, there's going to be this criticism and this negativity and all this other stuff I have to deal with that you kind of don't. You can hear about, but you kind of don't understand it until it's happening to you. And actually, I have a TEDx talk that I gave once that was a story of a time that I was getting slammed by this girl on social media. Like a million negative comments on my content in one day. And I reached out to her and asked her if she wanted to go on a zoom call and talk about it. And we ended up having a conversation. And I think people should listen to it because it was a big awakening for me about what these people are actually reacting to when they send negative comments to you. And it sort of changed my approach to showing up on social media and how much I actually care about all that and all the noise. And so I guess I would just tell my younger self to just keep doing it, but I would probably try to rid my brain of those spirals about that sooner than it actually happened.
- [60:18]
A
Well, that's super interesting. Yeah, I definitely need to go and give that a listen because that's. That's also so bold of you to be able to, like, reach out and be like, let's hop on a call.
- [60:30]
B
I thought she was gonna be a classic troll, where the moment you reply, she kind of disappears or, you know, deletes everything or just continues trolling and never wants to show her face. But part of the reason I asked is because she was writing it from her personal account. Like, it wasn't a burner account. And it was just like this personal woman account with family and friends and stuff on her account. So I just felt like there was something more going on. And I asked her and she surprisingly was like, yeah, sure, when are you free? And I was a little scared because you never know with these people if they're just, like, not well. Like, I didn't want to open the door for potential harm.
- [61:12]
A
Yes.
- [61:13]
B
But this was before I had kids and it was in 2020 and I just had my husband, like, being on standby by the door in case. And I recorded the whole thing in case anything was said. So it was all recorded. My husband was there in case I needed some support. I don't know what he would have done, just slammed the computer shut. But I recorded it all and it was. I don't even want to give it
- [61:33]
A
away for you, but yeah, don't give it away.
- [61:35]
B
Such a classic. Such a classic story of who these people are.
- [61:40]
A
Super interesting when this is my last question before we jump into some rapid fire. When you think about the next few years, what are you most excited about, both personally and professionally?
- [61:56]
B
I think personally I'm very, very excited. This coming summer we're going to be working on a renovation on our house that will include a new workspace for me and my husband now that we're joining forces in a lot of ways. So I'm very excited for that. And also it kind of signals like we knew this was our forever home, but when we bought it, it was not exactly what we needed it to be. But now we're like, we love the area, we love the spot. So now we're making moves on it. And professionally, I mean, the big thing my followers will say that happened this year so far was my I'm writing a book announcement, which was truly born out of just this creative renaissance I feel I'm going through where I've been. I just feel so like I want to just be making stuff all day and writing has been a big part of that, but it's not even the book. I think this has been the case throughout my whole career and it still holds. Is the thing I love about this job is that every single day you just don't know what opportunities are coming and what types of things you're going to get to do. And checking my inbox every day is such a dopamine hit. Like it's to me, it's not going on Instagram and seeing the comments, it's going to the inbox and seeing from the business side, like what cool things are happening. And sometimes it's an event or sometimes it's a partnership and a deal. Sometimes it's like a really cool type of deal where there's off platform activations or in person things. I haven't announced the brand of it yet, but I'm working with a baby brand this year that I love and designing hand watercolored my own line of pajamas for them.
- [63:50]
A
Oh my gosh.
- [63:51]
B
And like that was just such a good marrying of my passion for painting with something that has to do with My job. And so there's just always something new and different. And it's almost like I don't want to know. Like, I don't want someone to tell me, this is where your career is going. This is what you're going to do. I do have some ambitions and some big picture goals, specifically around the unscripted hosting world and hosting some sort of bigger content that's not on my own YouTube channel, but I just don't. I have no idea what that's gonna look like, what platform is gonna be, the place that it goes on, what that show is even gonna look like.
- [64:27]
A
I wonder if you're being.
- [64:28]
B
I kind of don't want to know.
- [64:29]
A
Manifesting. I don't want to put myself into a position where I asked for the universe for it. Until I know what I want.
- [64:38]
B
I need to figure out what I want first before I make the statement. Because it might come unfortunately. But yeah, it's kind of like that. I want to just let things unfold because I get a lot of big ideas and then if I go after them too fast, then it's like the fire burns out before and then I'm in it and I'm not inspired anymore.
- [64:58]
A
Yeah.
- [64:59]
B
So I just want to keep doing what feels good day by day. And I just have this trust that it's not that I trust that I'm going to blow up and be a star in all the ways I want to be. It's just that I have trust and that my career is going to be everything that it is meant to be. And whatever that means for me, if it's like literally exactly what it looks like today for the rest of time, then I'm so happy about that. And if it regresses because that's what's meant for me in my life, then that's what it is. But if it goes beyond, then that's what's meant. So I'm just open.
- [65:38]
A
I love that you're like, I'm open, universe. So whatever you want to hear me out. All right. Some rapid fire this or that parenting. And it's like kind of in sports terms.
- [65:51]
B
Oh, God, I hope I even know what you're talking about. I don't understand
- [65:55]
A
toddler tantrums. Are you giving them a timeout or penalty box?
- [66:01]
B
So, like, oh, warning. Such. I'm so bad at rapid fire. I would say more of a penalty box.
- [66:14]
A
Handling sibling fights. Do you let them play through it or blow the whistle?
- [66:19]
B
I really try so hard to let them play through it, but oftentimes My four year old is being unsafe towards my one year old. So we have to step in when someone's gonna get hurt. But we try really hard to just let them. Even if they're rough housing kids, sports,
- [66:34]
A
do you let them choose their sport or pick for them?
- [66:40]
B
Ultimately in life, the answer will be choose. For now, with him being four, we're kind of picking like a wide menu.
- [66:47]
A
Yeah.
- [66:47]
B
And trying to get him to try all of them.
- [66:50]
A
Absolutely. I think that's good. You're like, he doesn't know what badminton is. So like, he can't ask for it.
- [66:57]
B
He needs to do badminton.
- [67:00]
A
Picky, picky. Eating battles. Force the full playbook or take what you can get.
- [67:07]
B
Take what you can get. Oh, gosh. I know.
- [67:09]
A
I'm like, some days we're serving the same thing. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
- [67:13]
B
I mean, we try so hard to follow all those rules of things to do and not to do. And most recently, my strategy, which is probably anti the book, is he likes to read a book while we're eating. And I tell him between pages, the key to unlock the page is two bites of chicken, two bites of avocado, one piece of cheese, and then he does it. And it's the thing, the book turns
- [67:38]
A
like crazy how that happens.
- [67:40]
B
Exactly. And I'm like, you got to unlock the book. So I know you're not supposed to do that and you're just supposed to
- [67:46]
A
whatever is on the plate, the you're not supposed to do that. I've found a lot of like, balance in that. Which leads me to my next question. Screen time limits. Enforce the rules or let the ref miss a few calls.
- [67:59]
B
We're pretty strict on that. Just in that the iPad is only used for travel, so, like, it's not even in the house. And then for tv, the rule is just there's no TV before school on a weekday and it's like somewhat limited on the weekends. Unless in the event of someone's sick or it's like a snow day or we can't leave the house. Then there have been days where it's just free for all. Movie day.
- [68:25]
A
Yeah, no, I feel like there's balance in that for sure. I also quickly learned that there's a huge difference between like, iPad or like something that your kid can hold and like a big tv.
- [68:35]
B
Oh, interesting. Because I know there's a difference with when it's like people engaging with you versus just, you know, crazy content. But yeah, I love that. That's a good learning.
- [68:48]
A
Yes. And like, I've learned a Lot Bedtime routine, strict. Playbook are calling audibles.
- [68:55]
B
We're strict. We've got a routine. We're staying on schedule. It's one or two books. Do you want me to pick the book? Do you want to pick the book? Pick it. We're reading and then we're going to bed.
- [69:08]
A
And then last but not least, comparing yourself to other moms. Check the scoreboard or focus on your own game.
- [69:14]
B
Focus. I mean I feel like everyone's got to say that, but really focus. And I've been surprisingly, not surprisingly, but just I've been pleasantly surprised with myself throughout all of parenting with how much I've done the latter, whatever that one was. Prioritize yourself. Like I truly just from the start with my son was in this huge, I was in this huge mom group on the Upper east side of New York City when I lived there. It actually started as a group of six of us in a WhatsApp chat. And I'm now obviously I don't live there anymore. But the WhatsApp chat that the six of us began now has 875 people in it. People just kept adding and obviously I wasn't friends with all those people, but there was a group of probably 30 moms that I became really good friends with in New York City and we still have a text chat and talk to and I love all them dearly. And I did notice within that group just the different personalities that emerge with moms. Not to say that I was this chill all the time, you know, never stressed about if my kid was hitting a milestone. But I did notice the moms around me being just way more I looking to the side, comparing, checking things. And my son was like an extremely slow walker. Started walking at 16 months compared to some of my friends kids who walked it less than a year. And I just was like he's gonna walk, it's fine. You know, there's. If there's a problem, the doctor will tell me I need to do some sort of ot but PT or whatever. But if not, then he's gonna walk eventually. And I do have to thank probably my mom and my mother in law both for those types of calming insights. Just being like whispered in my ear all the time.
- [71:10]
A
Yes, yeah. Parenting I feel like is the biggest comparison game. But I've quickly learned that like it's not one size fits all. Like what works for me for getting my daughter to sleep might not work for somebody else. And like that's okay. And like also not being judgmental of the way that like you're not choosing.
- [71:27]
B
You also just can't. You can't know what you don't know about parenting when you're not a parent and all this stuff. I remember my husband and I talked recently, going back to the food thing. We talked. We've been really. It's important to us that our kids are eating somewhat good food. But I wouldn't say we are. You know, we're not a no snacks house, no sugar house. Like, they eat snacks and sweets and stuff, but it's relatively the good stuff as far as the grocery aisle goes, you know, relatively. Obviously, then they go to school where we can't control it. They have a birthday party every weekend with cake and pizza. Can't control it. So we just sort of let go. But we've talked a lot about how before we had kids, we used to look at if we saw a kid in public that was having a tantrum, we would look at each other and fully be judging the parents and be thinking to ourselves, it's the food. They're probably giving him like loads of sugar. It's gotta be something about their parenting. They're not, you know, being authoritative enough. Whatever. We were really judgy, having no experience with kids. And now that we have kids, like, we cringe at our younger selves because we do not everything right. But truly, like, my son's diet is probably in the top 5% of healthyish kids in the world of what they're eating, I think. I don't know. And he still has tantrums out in public and is uncontrollable and is off the walls and like, it's literally nothing that we're doing. And we are, we are now so regretful of some of our past actions and thoughts.
- [73:11]
A
It's growth. We can call it growth.
- [73:13]
B
It's growth. Yes.
- [73:15]
A
And then last question, actually, where can the people find you on social media?
- [73:20]
B
Instagram, TikTok and YouTube. My handle is @lucy b.fink, spelled L U C I E B F I N K. And then on my website, which is maybe gonna be down soon because we're working on it, but there's a lot of places to connect with me and work with me. If you're interested in the social media application, it's luciefink.com apply coaching and you could probably just find all of that on my Instagram story highlights.
- [73:48]
A
Awesome.
- [73:48]
B
Perfect.
- [73:49]
A
Well, thank you so much for coming on. Thanks, Alison, and I hope you guys enjoyed. Be sure to tune in every Sunday wherever you get your podcasts and see you next week. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.