Routines for real life with guest Shelby Sacco Spinek

Summary

Sunday Sports Club with Allison Kuch
Episode: Routines for Real Life
Guest: Shelby Sacco Spinek
Date: January 18, 2026
Producer: Dear Media

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Episode Overview

This episode centers on practical habit-building and daily routines, specifically how "real life" (think: work, marriage, parenting) impacts and can even enhance them. Host Allison Kuch is joined by self-improvement content creator and podcast host Shelby Sacco Spinek, known for her down-to-earth approach to personal growth. Together, they unpack how small shifts, strategic planning, and flexible mindsets can create long-lasting positive change—without an “all-or-nothing” mentality.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Shelby’s Approach to Habits and Self-Improvement

• Self-Image & Perspective: Shelby describes herself as a "big sister obsessed with self-improvement," aiming to demystify getting your life together and reaching personal goals ([00:29]).
  • "I always describe myself as a big sister who is obsessed with self improvement. Getting your life together, figuring out how to accomplish your goals." – Shelby ([00:29])
• Identity Shift: She identifies as a “type B that learned how to be type A to be successful,” emphasizing that intentional habits can override natural tendencies.

2. Building Foundational Habits

• Starting Small: Shelby’s first major habit shift was simply waking up a little earlier.
  • She stresses gradual change over drastic shifts: “I started waking up just 15 to 20 minutes earlier and then getting the hang of that... let my body adjust” ([04:41]).
• Morning Routine Evolution:
  • Wakes up at 5 am daily (for five years), despite naturally being a night owl ([02:51]).
  • Sleep routine adapted over several months, slowly shifting both bedtime and wakeup by increments.
  • “You don't have to go from 9am to 5am overnight. Your body—and your life—adjust better over time” ([05:37]).
• Fitness as Mental Wellness: Physical exercise is as much for mental health as it is for the body ([01:36]).

3. Flexibility and the Role of Relationships

• Coexisting Routines in Marriage:
  • Shelby’s husband does not wake up at 5 am, and at various times they have slept in separate rooms, highlighting the importance of maintaining individual routines while supporting each other’s goals ([08:46]-[10:53]).
  • “You shouldn't make your relationship a reason or like an excuse for why you can't change your own life.” – Allison ([10:53])
• Communication: Sharing goals with partners and family ensures support, not inadvertent sabotage ([11:20]).

4. Routine Flexibility: Plan B for “Real Life”

• Vacations & Life Changes: Shelby creates a “plan B” routine for travel or disruptions—a shortened, simplified version of her daily habits ([12:34]).
  • "I'm more realistic. But I still have a plan." – Shelby ([13:09])
• Adapting to Parenthood:
  • Shelby expresses excitement about the prospect of adapting routines for future kids, seeing it as a new challenge rather than a barrier ([15:22]).
  • Allison echoes that morning time often becomes even more important for parents seeking solo time ([16:45]).

5. Habit Stacking & Time Management

• Habit Stacking Explained: Pairing new habits with existing ones makes change easier and sustainable. Examples:
  • Listening to podcasts while working out/walking ([20:29])
  • Reading or sending texts only during particular routines (e.g., during a car ride or on a walk), ensuring focus time and reducing stress ([27:12]-[28:20])
• Making Unpleasant Tasks Enjoyable: Shelby pairs dreaded chores (like laundry or grocery shopping) with enjoyable activities (like audiobooks), which transforms her outlook ([25:28]-[26:03]).

6. Identifying and Replacing “Time Sucker” Habits

• Addressing TV & “Comfort” Traps: Watch for habits that sap time or don’t serve current goals. If you want to relax, find an activity that offers relaxation but also aligns with your ambitions (e.g., reading or light cleaning while watching TV) ([29:19]-[31:55]).
• Root Cause Approach: Understand what you’re actually craving from an “unhelpful” habit and experiment with substitutions.

7. Keystone Habits & “Snowball Effect”

• Making Your Bed: This seemingly small act builds a success loop and lays groundwork for other good habits—described as a “keystone habit” ([39:55]-[41:22]).
  • “When you form that [habit] pathway and understand how to create a habit in the first place, other habits follow more easily.” – Shelby ([41:12])
• Exercise: Another high-impact keystone; it often leads to healthier eating and more movement overall ([41:30]).

8. The Science of Habits: Cues, Routines, Rewards

• Building Habit Loops: Each habit consists of a cue (trigger), routine (action), and reward (benefit) ([42:07]-[43:53]).
  • Understanding your own loops (e.g., stress → late-night snacking → dopamine spike) arms you to swap routines while keeping the cue and reward.

9. Habits for Busy Parents

• Practical Suggestions:
  • Carve out small, protected “me time” slots (even just 5-10 minutes), ideally in the morning or right after kids’ bedtime.
  • Stack habits so health-boosting or relaxing actions become built-in (e.g., tidy up while listening to music, walk while scrolling social) ([51:36]-[55:01]).
  • Plan B routines are especially crucial for parents, so a disrupted day doesn’t mean “failing” at your goals ([55:33]-[56:08]).

10. Motivation vs. Discipline

• “Motivation might be there 50% of the time. Discipline is what ensures you show up regardless.” – Shelby ([60:38])
• Small, daily follow-through builds true discipline (e.g., making your bed, going for a walk) ([59:59]-[60:25]).
• Habits, eventually, become automatic—like washing your hands after using the bathroom ([60:49]).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You have to handpick your habits and small choices, because that's the key to massive change.” – Shelby ([34:13], [65:36])
• “If you don't like something, just change it. But change it by one small step.” – Shelby ([65:06])
• “I will never not wake up at 5am again. Which is crazy, because I would’ve never described myself as a morning person before.” – Shelby ([02:51])
• “You shouldn’t make your relationship a reason or excuse for why you can’t change your own life.” – Allison ([10:53])
• “Once you become aware, you can change your life.” – Shelby ([33:39])
• On making bed as keystone: “You’re forming a habit pathway. Once you’ve done it, it’s easier for other good habits to follow.” ([41:22])
• “The key takeaway: One small intentional habit will change your life.” – Shelby ([65:36])
• “My advice: start so small with one habit you can do every single day.” – Shelby ([56:44], [65:58])
• “Your thoughts control your actions, your feelings, who you show up as.” – Shelby ([65:58])

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment | Timestamp | |-----------------------------------------------------|-------------| | Shelby’s personal background | 00:29 | | How she started waking up at 5am | 02:51 | | Adapting to early wakeups slowly | 04:41 | | Habit stacking examples | 20:29, 25:28| | On maintaining habits during vacations/interruptions | 12:34 | | Routines in marriage & communication | 08:46-11:02 | | Keystone habits: making bed, exercise | 41:22, 41:30| | Science of habit loops | 42:07 | | Advice for busy moms | 51:36 | | Importance of discipline over motivation | 60:38 | | Book recommendations & self-improvement | 63:27-64:18 | | Final advice: how to start | 65:58 |

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Actionable Takeaways

• Start with One Small, Consistent Habit: Choose something sustainable and make it non-negotiable (e.g., making your bed, five minutes of affirmations).
• Stack New Habits onto Existing Routines: Listen to a podcast while walking, text friends only during downtime, meal prep while catching up on a favorite show.
• Stay Flexible—Have a “Plan B” Routine: Life will interrupt, so plan in advance what you’ll do when it does.
• Communicate Goals in Relationships: It helps partners/family support you, not derail you.
• Discipline > Motivation: Building discipline through small, daily actions is the foundation for lasting change.

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For more from Shelby:

• Instagram & TikTok: @shelbysaco5
• Podcast: Sad to Savage
• Coming in 2027: Shelby's debut book

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This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking realistic, actionable ways to improve daily routines, especially at times of transition or when “real life” threatens to throw you off course.

Transcript

[A]

The following podcast is a Dear Media Production. What's up, guys? Welcome back to Sunday Sports Club Podcast, a podcast all about sports told by a woman. And that woman is me. Hi guys, I'm Alison Cooch. And today we have on Shelby, who. When I think of people that have their shit together, I think of Shelby. Okay. Sad to savage. Habits, planning, routine. Like, kind of. How would you describe yourself to somebody?

[B]

I am. I always describe myself as a big sister who is obsessed with self improvement. Getting your life together, figuring out how to accomplish your goals. And I really learned it because I am a big sister and I wanted to help my siblings. I'm also really sociable and I always tell people I'm type B, except I always mess up and say I'm plan B that learned how to be type A to be successful. Okay, so I'm kind of like a get your life together and figure it out type of person.

[A]

What is your sign?

[B]

I'm a Pisces, but there's two types of Pisces. So there's one that's emotional and there's one that's creative. And I like to say I'm the creative, but my husband will say I'm the emotional.

[A]

Of course he will, yeah.

[B]

Cause I'm kind of both.

[A]

Okay, well, I am so excited to talk with you because not only because selfishly, I'm like, how do I get my life together? But also because it's the new year and I feel like people like to like jumpstart the new year. I. I like any excuse to like jumpstart or try something new, something fresh. You don't have to have a new year to do all these new routines, but I think it's good time to renew that. So before we dive into habits, I wanna start with you. What are some of your favorite habits that have changed your life?

[B]

I have so many. I was thinking about this. So when I decided to change my life, I started by just waking up a little bit earlier. Because I figured people that wake up early have their life together. And at the time I was working from home. Cause it was Covid. And I was waking up at 9am for my 9am meetings at work. And I was like, I'm gonna get fired. Like, I'm literally joining this call half asleep. Or the calls would end and I'd fall. Had fallen back asleep and I'd still be on the call like for an hour and a half. I'm like, I need to get it together. So I started waking up a little bit earlier and that Habit was the first thing that really showed me I did have control over change in my life. So I'd say waking up early has helped me in every area because now I'm able to not only work out, do things for my mental health, work on my relationship in the morning. There's so many things that I can do because I wake up early that that's one of my favorites. I do a lot of habits around just like self love and confidence, which have changed my life because it's allowed me to grow as a person, but also grow in my career. And other habits that I really, really love would probably be anything to do with fitness because I learned that fitness isn't just for your body, it's for your mental health too. So I could act, I'm like, wait. I could list like 50 habits and I'm like, wait, this one's my favorite. This is my favorite.

[A]

But now you don't get up at like 8am before 9am meeting, you get up at like 5am Yeah, I get.

[B]

Up at 5 every day. I have for the last five years. I'm about to hit five years and I am convinced that I will never not do this. Which is crazy because I've never, I would have never described myself as a morning person before intentionally creating the habit. I'm like a like born night owl. Actually. I was a basement child. So because I'm one of six kids, my parents literally shoved my ass in the basement when I was like 9 with my older sister. And because of that I, I, my parents were so busy upstairs with the little kids, they didn't check on us. So I could stay up till like 3am oh yeah. So we would watch Degrassi, me and my sister in the basement literally till 3am every night. So I developed this really bad habit of staying up all night and then sleeping in. So then when I started waking up early, I realized how crucial it was to actually being successful and letting me reach my goals. So now I'll never go back. So I'm up every day at 5.

[A]

Well, I have so many questions. Just you waking up at 5 first thing, what time do you go to sleep?

[B]

I go to sleep at 10pm, 10 to 10:30. Except when things get crazy in my life. So like work gets like really, really busy or I'm just more stressed out. My worst habit, I'm like, we might as well just say it right up front is that I'll sacrifice sleep. Cause I'll never sacrifice my morning routine. Cause it's so crucial.

[A]

Crazy that's like determination though. Like you're making the decision. Like, I, no matter what, I'm going to get up at 5am every day.

[B]

I know that that routine, like going and working out, walking, making a healthy break, doing my affirmations, my devotional in the morning, everything that I do, if I were to miss that, it throws off everything where I can plan in advance to get to bed earlier the next day. Okay, so I always sacrifice sleep a little bit, but my goal is always to be in bed by 10pm asleep.

[A]

Okay. And then second question. How long did it take for your body and your mental to like catch up with waking up at 5am every day? Because I'm sure people are like, oh, I would love to do that, but that sounds absolutely horrible.

[B]

Oh, oh wait. I love that you asked this question because I think a lot of people think you go from 9am sleeping in through your meetings to okay, I'm waking up at 5am when I started doing it, I started waking up just 15 to 20 minutes earlier and then getting the hang of that. Because your body does take a second to literally readjust. And then there's the whole if you're waking up a little bit earlier, you have to shift what time you're going to bed just a little bit. So I had a lot of trial and error, which is why I love teaching it on social media. Just habits in general, where I was like, okay, hold on. If I've been going to bed at 2 to 3am Since I was 9 years old, I'm not all of a sudden gonna be like, oh, okay, let's go to bed at 10. Which my nighttime routine took me four months to actually grasp it and understand it that you can't just go from like 2am to 10pm So I started shifting a little bit earlier every morning and then shifting a little bit later. So I'd do that, say wake up 15 to 20 minutes earlier for two to three weeks, let my body adjust. And then I'd be like, wait, I'm so excited. I feel like this actually made sense.

[A]

Yeah, okay.

[B]

Yeah, like now I can go a little. I went from like 8:40 to 8:30 to 8:15, 8:00 clock, down to 7:45, 7. I started doing bigger jumps as I kind of got the hang of it. Cause I knew how to shift. And then I worked down to like 6:45, 6:15, 5:35, 25. So it was kind of over the course of a few months where I think when you see it from that perspective and you're like, oh, that makes a lot of sense. Because you can let your body adjust over time. Opposed to 9am to 5am it really works out. I have a lot of friends that'd be like, wait, I wanna wake up early. And they would try it way first and. And be like, wait, this is.

[A]

I'm like, I'll just wake up at 5am tomorrow.

[B]

Yeah, because you want to, right? Like, when you feel ready to change your life, you're like, okay, I want to do it today. And I think that's where a lot of people get tripped up with, like, New Year's or new habits or new goals is going 0 to 100. But when you realize making small changes that you can keep consistent, that are realistic, that's how you'll actually progress over time and set yourself up for success. Because you're also not overwhelming yourself and you're making it something that you actually could do opposed to something that you could only do if you were insanely motivated in the moment. If that makes sense.

[A]

Like, my husband's definitely a zero to 100. It works for him, great. But I'm more of like, okay, I feel like I won't stick with a habit if I do it overnight. Like, I almost need to gradually do it where, like, oh, if I'm trying to eat healthier, like, instead of getting fries, I'll get a salad every time. And then it's like, oh, well, instead of getting a burger, maybe I'll get like a full salad with chicken. And like, the smaller, gradual changes. And then it's like, less scary.

[B]

Yeah, I love that example because it really is little. Little tweaks, especially when it comes to nutrition. That's another huge thing that I love talking about because I didn't understand nutrition for the, like. When I actually sat down and thought about it and started researching it and learning about it, I'm like, wait, what? Like, how did I not know what any of this meant? But little. Little swaps to your diet make the biggest change. Opposed to when people think, oh, I can never eat this again. Oh, I'm cutting out all sugar. All of this I learned when I was learning about nutrition. I learned what coffee creamer actually was, which sounds so dumb. Cause I'm like, I was obsessed with it. I would literally drink it out of the carton. It's so like. And my sisters would be like, are you okay? And I'm like, yum, this is so good. And then when I realized that I was abusing coffee creamer on a daily basis, like, Actually, I measured it out and I realized I was having the equivalent to eating an entire cake a day in saturated fats in just coffee creamer. So then when I made that tweak and understood it and could change that, I. I lost I think like eight pounds in two weeks. From a small change to my diet. Nothing else.

[A]

Well, that's even just like, think of like how many drinks you have a day. If you're like, okay, I drink a coffee a day, I drink a Coke a day. And then I like to have like, I don't know, like something flavored in my water. It's like that's. If you just cut out that and just replace it with water.

[B]

Yeah. Or even swap to like a healthier alternative of like, okay, sugar free or like a zero calorie pop instead of. It's so wild figuring out those little, little tweaks. And that's kind of how it is with all habits. Like, it's like the littlest change.

[A]

So interesting to think about. Okay, so going back to the 5am thing. You just got married.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And you guys just moved into a new house. Does your husband wake up at 5am Every day?

[B]

No. So he does not. And I, every single morning when I wake up, I. When I like film a morning routine, I'll just stand and stare at him.

[A]

No, please. I literally know what you're talking about.

[B]

It is my favorite thing and it's so stupid. I don't know why I started doing it. But I just stand above him and stare at him. Now he wakes up. I don't know when he wakes up cause I'm gone. But by the time I get back from my workout, he's awake. So I know it's at some point, but so many people will say like, oh, do you ever just wanna like lay with your husband? Or like, are you cozy in bed and you wanna get up? And I'm like, eh. I feel like I'm honestly better than him sometimes. I'm like, he's still sleeping and I'm up. But he wakes up early. Just not the same time as me. Which when we started living together, he moved in with me at our old house and we didn't immediately share a room. Which was funny because he moved in and I was like, ew, you're actually like a guy.

[A]

I kind of like loved that. I saw that on social media and I was like, wait, I feel like more couples should do that. It's have their own space.

[B]

I'm the biggest advocate for it. It is the best thing that ever happened. And the only reason we did it is because he moved in really suddenly. Like we weren't planning on it, but he had actually lived with my sister and her husband, which is another side thing. And I was moving to North Carolina and he was gonna move with me.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

But my sister and her husband were trying for a baby, so he had to leave because they needed his room. So instead of getting a lease, I'm like, oh, you to move with me. Just move in with me a little early. So then I was like, wait, I don't want to share my room yet. Like I, I love my room.

[A]

You're like, wait, I was actually not ready to give that up.

[B]

I'm like, wait, if you move in with me, that means you're going to live in here? Actually, no way. And he's the messiest person ever, which no shame, cuz I was too. So I'm not like against him, but I'm just like, wait, you can be messy anywhere else but my space. So he, when he first moved in with me and we did separate bedrooms, I got to see how he lived and I got to see how I lived. And I was like, there's no world where we coexist. And don't get in a fight if you're in my space, but if you're in your own room, it doesn't bother me. So we've kind of continued that into our new house where he has his own bedroom, I have my own bedroom. And then sometimes he will, now that we're actually like married. He sleeps in my bed all the time. But I'll tease him. I'm like, get out of my room. I'm like, you're not sleeping in my bed tonight. I'm like, did you shower? He's like, yeah. I'm like, mm.

[A]

You're like, yeah. It is so interesting because like, then you shouldn't make your relationship a reason or like an excuse for why you can't change your own life.

[B]

Yes. I think a lot of people do struggle with that because you either kind of fall into habits with your partner or they have something and it's easier to kind of justify not doing something because the other isn't where say like it's waking up and you're like, wait, but my partner isn't waking up. I'm like, wait, tell them that you're better than them and get up.

[A]

But you're like, so get up.

[B]

Yeah, but I think that when you sit down, like make your own goals or what you want for Your life, you're not always going to be matching your partner. Cause, like, my husband has similar goals to me, but they're still separate. Where he likes to, like, do different things after work, where I would rather do everything in the morning. So when you can, like, look at your own goals and separate and say, okay, like, we can help each other and encourage each other, but we don't have to do the same thing, that's really helpful. Or one thing that I suggest for people that are like, wait, I wanna change my life, but my partner doesn't, is communicating your goals with that person so that they aren't kind of working against you, they're working for you. Right?

[A]

They're like, oh, just like, eat the cheeseburger. Like, it's one burger. And you're like, well, yeah, it's one burger.

[B]

Like, you're like, but it's not my goal. Or like my husband, I'm always. He would never make me sacrifice waking up early to, like, lay with him or do something else. Or like, we're both really respectful of each other's thing that I think that that's really helpful. Even, like, my family or my siblings, like, they all know my goals, so they're not going to ever kind of work against me.

[A]

So that's so interesting. I'm definitely hard on Isaac. I'm like, jesus Christ. Like, we get it. You're running an ultramarathon. Like, you don't need to go out and run every single day. Like, wow, okay. Anyways, is there any. Is there ever a time you turn off your habits or like your routine?

[B]

I'm like, no.

[A]

Like, if you guys go on vacation.

[B]

When we go on vacation, I have kind of like a plan B that I do. So I know exactly. Yeah. No, that's an actual plan B. I always say that. And then I never catch it. And I'm like, oh, oh, my God. See, that's kind of telling the truth that I am type B. Yeah. But when I go on vacation, I have like a list of my habits. And at first I did this. Like, I pre planned it out. Like, I know what I do every morning for my morning routine and my nighttime routine. But when you're out of town or on vacation or you have like a crazier time in your life and you can't complete all of it, I have the second list. That's like basically half what I normally do. So I'm not hard on myself for not being able to accomplish everything. I'm more realistic. But I still have a plan. So like, if we go on vacation, I know that I'm not like doing a whole tidy up in my nighttime routine like I used to do at my house. But I know that I can still do affirmations. I can still do my skincare in my morning routine. Say we're on vacation and I don't have the time to actually go workout and walk. I can choose one or the other. Or I'll always bring like my journals and my habit tracker so that I can sit down and still do those. So I kind of make. I kind of play around with it. Or like, I got a nose job in January. And I thank you. I love it. Oh my God. My husband hit me in the face last night on accident while we were sleeping. And I actually was so mad. And then I Venmo requested him and I said for hitting me in the face last night. And he's like, what are you talking about? He didn't even remember he did it. Cause we just slept too close, like nearby. I'm like, oh my gosh. But when I got that done, I had like a whole list. Cause my routine changed for like six weeks. Cause you can't work out, right? So I just made a new, like, temporary routine that I could follow. I think now that we're like talking out loud, the key to like being prepared for those moments is really just sitting down and spending like 20 minutes planning it out of, oh, I can't do these things. But instead of sacrificing everything, I can still do like 5%, 10%.

[A]

Well, it's interesting because whenever I think of vacation, like you do all these things to prepare for vacation and then you just kind of like, what? Let loose on vacation and don't do anything. But I almost feel like I would feel better on vacation had I like, had that time or like brought some of those routines in that make me feel more confident. Like, oh yeah, going for a run. Like that makes me feel better. So like, why would I not do that on vacation? And then I'm sure it like also helps not derailing everything when you get back home. Because it's like jumping back into everything.

[B]

That is a big piece to everything too. What I found with my habits is I'll think about like the physical health benefits, the mental health benefits, and that it's like, I want kind of exactly what you said. Like, I want to feel good when I'm in those scenarios on top of it. So continuing them, even if it's just a little bit, like it really does just keep Me in the same mindset and routine of like, who I want to be.

[A]

Well, and so now I'm curious because as a mom, I'm like, does it make you nervous the idea of having kids and like maybe derailing, like what you like a good thing going?

[B]

I'm so excited to have kids, I cannot wait. I think about this all the time because people always say it to me, like, oh, wait till you have kids. You're not gonna be waking up early anymore. And from my perspective, the only thing that I'm worried about is my work ethic. Like, I love work. I can shut myself in my office for 10 hours, right? And obviously when you have kids, you can't just, bye, see you later. I guess. So that's the only thing that I'm more concerned about, that I'll want to focus more obviously on my family than work. Which scares me because I really like my career. But in terms of habits and routines, I think it sounds almost really exciting that I get to figure out like a new kind of normal. Yeah, like a new. I love a challenge, I love a goal, right? So I like the idea of, okay, I have this new phase where I get to figure out like a new morning routine that works for me and my family, or a new nighttime routine, or like a new gym routine. And I've even started talking to my husband. We like sit down and have these like little like monthly check ins of we both know each other's priorities when it comes to like our health, our fitness, like things that we really love. And we've already started discussing kind of what's gonna happen, who's gonna get when, like I already claimed the morning of like working out up front. I'm like, listen, before we get into this, this is what's gonna have to happen for me. And he can claim like the night. So we're already kind of thinking about those things, but I'm really excited for it. Outside of the fact that I'm like, wait, am I gonna like to work anymore? Like, I just love it so much.

[A]

But there's so many parts to that. First off, the morning routine, it's almost more like necessary when you have kids because your kids are like, oh, I'm not getting up at 5am I mean, as babies, right? Like there's growing pains there. But when I think of like, oh, when can I have time to myself? It's always the morning, like, yeah. Cause I'm like, I don't want to be get to 7pm and then be like, oh, I'm going to go work out. No, that sounds horrible. But, like, waking up at 5am Sounds less scary when I'm like, oh, I get to dedicate that to myself and like, do all these things. The first year of postpartum was actually the hardest for me because I like working so much and I like having time to like, sit my computer and get my email sent and like plan out things. And so I think that was like the scariest part. But then after a year I'm like, okay, I. I'm like, now I'm not even scared for a second kid because I'm like, oh, it was such a shell shock that going into the second kid I'm like, well, I already know what to expect.

[B]

Yeah, you're like, this is not my first rodeo anymore. But it makes sense because you are in this like, new phase of life where you can't even truly predict, like, how you're gonna feel, what's gonna happen, how things are gonna change. But that's so. I'm so excited for you to have your second baby. It's so exciting.

[A]

It's gonna be. I'm sure there's gonna be like growing pains as well with the second one. But like, it's fun, right? And like, I already did it the first time, so hopefully it'll.

[B]

Yeah, you'll already have like a path that you can follow and then you'll figure out more things.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. Like. Sure. What are some questions you ask people for? Like you helping figure out their routine for their morning or night?

[B]

I'll usually sit with someone and say, what are your like, non negotiables that you want to do every morning? So like, for example, with you and your daughter, you guys probably have like a little routine already going.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, you have to get her up and either like, obviously feed her and.

[A]

Like, she has to eat, she has to get her hair done. And that's kind of it. I mean, get dressed.

[B]

So I always ask like those non negotiables and then I'll ask someone what is a problem that they're kind of dealing with right now or something that would improve their life that they'd want to add in. And then from there you can kind of look at someone's morning or night and find little pockets of time or create those pockets of time. Yeah, because to change your life, you need to create the time to do it. Because everyone already has their own, like, schedule or things needed of them or things that could take their time. So finding those pockets is so important. Like for example, if you were like, I really wanna focus on my health, or I'm doing really bad with fueling my body because I don't have enough time, it'd be looking at your schedule and saying, okay, if your daughter's getting up at this time and you know that this is the routine you're following with her, can we build in 15 minutes right before where you're only waking up 15 minutes earlier? Or in your nighttime routine, say you're struggling with making like, breakfast for yourself. Can you pre Prep that for 10 minutes before bed? So it's really looking at both of those times. And then I think the hardest part for people when they're changing their lives or creating morning routines or night is really just knowing what to do. But like, if you were sitting, if you were sitting with someone said, here's step by step what to do. Anyone could follow it. It's really just like sitting and finding those times.

[A]

I think that it's hardest, like, I know what to do to change my life.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Like, if I Woke up at 5:00am, I immediately, like started working out, like in my home gym. Like, that takes out like having to drive to a gym, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then I made breakfast for myself immediately after. And then I like, sat down and journaled. Like, that sounds so rejuvenating. But I'm like, why don't I just do? Almost like, you have to find the way to make the most out of your time.

[B]

Yes. And find something that's like, attractive to you, that's not overwhelming, that's not once a week that you truly can stick with. So, like, for you, I would say to start with just that morning workout and habit stacking. That morning workout, which habit stacking is just when you take something that you're already gonna do and you pair it with something that you get to do. Well, there's two different ways of habit stacking, but that's the one that I prefer to talk about. And then the other is when you have a habit and immediately after you stack another habit on top of it.

[A]

Ok.

[B]

But for the example of you just focusing on waking up and going to your home gym and habit stacking, so taking something else and pairing it. Say you want to learn more about nutrition or you want to learn more about, or just want to have time for yourself in general, you can stack that with listening to a podcast. So you're working out, but you have that podcast on. And then from there you could say, okay, right after I'm done working out for just five minutes, I'm gonna have my journal already sitting in the gym. So it's already right there. I can already visually see it. And you can go over and write for five minutes or even one minute. Like you just want to write one affirmation to yourself. Like just making it so easy so that you can get the hang of it. Because then your brain and your body will actually get to see the benefits of it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then that kind of builds momentum on its own of, okay, I feel really good when I do this. I made it as easy as possible for myself and I can follow this and then you can add more kind of as you get the hang of it.

[A]

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[B]

I think it's like a key to it because habit stacking to me is something that creates time with the time that you already have allocated to something. So different. Examples of habit stacking that I do in my life is every day I walk on the treadmill or I walk outside, obviously Michigan, now the treadmill only. But when I'm on that treadmill, I have a list of things that I can do based on what's going on in my life. So typically I'll either edit from like a video that I filmed that morning.

[A]

Jesus Christ.

[B]

So I'll like use that time where I'm like, okay, I have to work, but I get to walk for. And it's something that I want to do. So I'll edit, I'll go through emails, I'll plan the day. So like, not all of them, I'll pick one, right? Or if I literally don't get off the treadmill until I finish my work for the day. Or I'll say, you know what? I really want to read. I do that a lot. Like I set up my Kindle in front of it. Cause that's something that I genuinely like want to do. Like that's fun.

[A]

Like you're like, I wanna read my book.

[B]

Yes. Where I'm like, ooh, I don't have time to like sit for an hour and read. But I can do it while I walk. And then it's like, wait, I'm just like I'm ahead of everything. Like I'm really just setting myself for success there. Or I'll sometimes just scroll on TikTok. Like I just want to like, yeah, it's like rotting without rotting. Cause I feel really good about it. Or like when I do laundry, I have a specific audiobook. Like I'll always listen to self improvement books, but I have one that's like a story. So when I'm doing laundry, I'm actually like in a book. And I look forward to doing laundry because that's also in my head. Like time that I'm kind of relaxing.

[A]

Like you associate the two.

[B]

Yes. Or I hated grocery shopping. Like genuinely hated it. That was like my torture for some reason. And then I would get a. I got a special book for just the grocery store. So then I'd want to go there. Cause I wanted to know what was happening. Which took a little bit of self control, honestly at first because I'm like, wait, I could literally just turn this on right now. But then I find that if I pair and habit stack different things that I'm already doing, it makes the task so much more enjoyable. Or there's like little, little ones. So say you want to focus on like say as a mom, you're like, you know, I don't have that much time for my friends or my family. Like I'm like in a different world. You could do a habit stack of any time that you're walking. You call one person like one of your friends or you face him, someone. And that's one thing that I do because I feel like I struggle with keeping tabs even without kids, keeping tabs on friends. Because I'm in my own world that I pick like a new friend each week where I' I'm like, okay, I'm on a walk. I can text them for like 30 minutes. I could call them. So that's a fun way that I have it stacked based on kind of what I need to focus on in that moment. So habit stacking I think is so powerful because you have control. It's without kind of creating the time. You find that time that you already have in your schedule and then pair it with something that you want to do.

[A]

So, for example, I hate texting people back. I feel like it's, like, a lot to, like, oh, stop an activity fully. Sit down, find the text message. My daughter's like, mommy, Mommy. And I'm like, hold on. Then find the text message, Respond. So you're saying, like, if I want to get better at texting people back, I should stack it with something I'm doing that I'm enjoying.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Not that I don't enjoy talking to my friends. No.

[B]

I. Texting is so hard for me too, where it literally feels like a chore. What I.

[A]

You're available to people 24 7.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which is so crazy. So I don't text people back in specific times of my day. Like, my morning routine. That is only time for me. And I know that's something that stresses me out, and I don't want to do it, so I don't do it during that time because that's, like, a peaceful time. Nothing's kind of. It's for me. Same with my nighttime routine. I've found that when my husband's driving somewhere and I'm sitting in the passenger seat, that is the perfect time for me to literally start and text people. Or if I'm intentional about it on my walks. Okay, so those are two times that I've found that I'm like, okay, I can't do anything else while I'm, like, in the car. Obviously, I'm not the one driving, but I'm like, I can't really do anything else, so I might as well sit and, like, respond. Respond to people. Or when I'm on airplanes, Like, I will do a lot of work on airplanes that I'm putting off.

[A]

I love an airplane.

[B]

Just texting. But, like, anything.

[A]

Having a child will derail that.

[B]

And it's like, actually, wait. Things are telling me now, or I was gonna find that out. Wait a second.

[A]

No, it's actually crazy, like, whenever we travel, that is our busiest day of, like, not being able to do anything because it's like, you. Especially an infinite lap. Like, I genuinely don't have enough space. And, like, until they get to a certain age, they can't even watch screen time. So it's like. Like, you're literally entertaining for five hours.

[B]

Yeah. That sounds so exhausting. Actually, now that I think about it.

[A]

Literally, I'm like, I miss the times where I'm like, I, like, don't feel like emailing, like, on this plane, but I'm gonna do it. And now I'm like, I wish I could email.

[B]

It's like, wait, now I'm gonna really, like, really soak in. But I'm on a plane until I have a meeting.

[A]

No, you should definitely soak that now. When our daughter is two, I'm like, oh, she can, like, watch a movie from start to finish. I'm like, this is so nice. I'm like, downloading stuff. I'm like, this is great. When it comes to, like, helping people out with their morning routines and nighttime routines, are there any red FL that you look for?

[B]

I think I'll look for, like, what their bad habits are or habits that don't serve them or that, like, are time suckers. So, for example, a lot of people will watch TV before bed, which isn't a horrible thing if that's how you relax and that's how you feel comfortable. But if you're trying to change your life and you don't have time for it, that's a really easy spot to, like, understand what you're craving from that habit and then change it. So, like, for example, say someone really wants to say their house is really, really messy and they feel like they don't have time to clean it. Which one of my favorite things ever is instead of doing, like, full resets or like, I can't clean up after myself to save my life, but I can in my nighttime routine every night, clean.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Where it's like one specific time. So finding that's really helpful. But what I would look at is say, okay, say you're watching TV every night for an hour to two hours, but you want to go to the gym, you want to clean your house, you want to do anything else. It's kind of understanding what you're craving. So are you craving, like, to just relax and sit down? Are you craving for brain to be distracted, like, understanding why you're doing that? And then also. So you can either change that and say, okay, actually, maybe you don't want to do anything else. You just don't want to watch tv. You feel like that's a bad habit. You can then say, okay, I'm looking to kind of zone out or do kind of a mindless activity. You could start reading. You could just swap it with coloring. Like, you could find new habits to replace it. So I like to look at what they're currently doing. If it's no Longer serving them to change it. Or I'll look at things like that, like big things and kind of backtrack, like, okay, are you liking watching TV because you're spending time with your husband and you feel like you don't, like, late with them that often? And then instead, can you guys do something else where you're, like, cooking together? Like, yeah, I'll always, like, kind of dissect it. Because once you can look at your schedule, the key to everything is looking at it and then taking, like, five steps backwards and, like, understanding it and building awareness so that then you can change it. Because if you just go into it, like, okay, I don't want to watch TV anymore. I'm going to get my life together and clean my house. It's like having the pieces of why you're doing it help you understand where to actually go next. And then another thing I like to do is set watching tv, if you really wanna do that at the end of the routine. So having, like, one, two steps that you're gonna do before you sit down and watch tv, if, you know, once you sit down, you're, like, down for the night, and you're like, okay, now I'm comfy. I don't wanna get up and go do this. It's okay. Let me do this one, two step. And then I can go and relax and do that.

[A]

It's so interesting. Cause, like, even I like rewatch Grey's Anatomy all the time. But I'm like, oh, I'm gonna do it while I'm doing laundry. Or I make sure to do. I'll put it on my phone. I'm like, oh, I'm gonna load something into the laundry. Or I'm gonna reorganize, like, a drawer. And it's like, oh, I'm doing something productive while I'm doing something not productive.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so it's like pairing the two so it feels better. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like a good habit that.

[B]

So I love doing that. Like, my sisters would want me to watch Love Island. Cause they would watch it and then I'd feel so left out. I'm like, I have to do, like, figure this out to the point where I would go on the treadmill, which I always walk in the morning, but I would go after work, walk on the treadmill just to catch up on, like, Love island on TikTok, so that I could talk to my sisters about it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Where it's like, I feel productive. Cause I'm actually doing something with, like.

[A]

For yourself? Yes.

[B]

Yeah. Where I'm Like, I need to understand this because I need to be able to talk to them, and I don't want to be left out, but I do. Like, finding that, like, those little ways to stack it or even, like, making dinner and listening to, like, a podcast or, like, if you want to relax and making dinner and, like, listening to music. I act like I cook. I actually don't cook a thing. My husband cooks everything. But he will literally have his little iPad out while he cooks and, like, watch sports, and it's, like, so cute. Like, that's, like, fun time for him. He does those things together. And.

[A]

No, I. I feel like that's, like, what. How to, like, benefit your life in other ways. Right? Like, if you want to eat healthier and you're like, oh, I just, like, hate cooking, then do something that, like, you enjoy while cooking that kind of.

[B]

Like, brings you joy. Or before I had my husband to cook every meal for me, and I hated cooking, I would do that little habit with the grocery store. So I'd find a book that I love so I could make that more enjoyable. Or I would sit down and say, okay, only one time a week, I'm going to spend one hour just doing, like, all the hard work and saying, here's healthy meals that I could get. Here's what I need to get from the grocery store. And then I could meal prep a little bit. And I just had that one hour instead of every single day where I could get prepared. That made it way easier for me.

[A]

Well, because it sounds so daunting, right? Like, oh, I want to eat healthier, so I'm going to cook every meal at home. It's like, I don't want to do that. I also don't have the time to do that. So it's finding essentially, it feels like what you're saying is, like, just having the time to sit down and, like, plan out your week or your life.

[B]

Yeah. And just becoming aware of my. One of my favorite quotes is once you become aware, you can, like, change your life. Because a lot of the time you don't even know what you're doing wrong or where you could change or where you could grow or, like, if one little thing was different. So, like, if you sit down and think about it and backtrack, you can solve anything. Like, I am a firm believer that you can change your life. Like, you could change absolutely anything. Whoever you want to become, whatever habits you want to have, whoever you want to identify. Like, you could change everything about yourself. Hand pick your qualities, all it Is is like making that decision and then slowly making small changes to get you to get there.

[A]

It's a really interesting concept because then it's like, oh, if the world is your oyster, like, what person do you want to be? Like, what qualities do you want?

[B]

You just have to choose it.

[A]

Yeah, that's kind of like you just.

[B]

Have to actually just pick.

[A]

You're just like, who do you want to be?

[B]

But that I did that recently after I got my nose job. I knew that I was not going to be kind of like my normal for a while because I couldn't. You can't work out after. And I sat down, was like, okay, for the next year. Wait. I wanted a fat ass for so many years that that was my only goal. Like, I only wanted a fat ass. Like, I changed my eating to help me get it. I, like, all my workouts were working towards this goal. And then when I was getting my nose job, I'm like, damn, Rip. I'm never going to see it again. But I was like, wait, I could actually just change. Like, I've wanted this for so long. I accomplished it. Why don't I try something else?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I sat down and made a plan for it. And then because I made that goal, I could make the small habit changes over the course of the last year to work towards a new goal where if I didn't just sit down and think, like, you have to sit and pick. So then you can, like, make choices, but you're also allowed to change along the way way, which is a big thing too, where, like, you could choose. Say, I really wanted to be, like, a wellness girly, which I am now.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So, like, congrats, it worked out great. But if you want to pick and say, okay, I want to be someone that is really into wellness and wakes up early and does this, this and this on that path, like, the actual journey of figuring out you could find. Okay, wait, my mental health is doing so great because I'm running and I'm realizing I love running. And you can divert and go down a different path. And it's more like once you start to find, like, what goes to you.

[A]

Well, I have to interrupt you. You were the reason that I thought, like, running is not as intense as you make it out to be because, like, one day you're like, you can go as slow as you want.

[B]

I would actually be like, basically, like, walking with, like, a little bounce. And I'm like, wait, I actually really love this. Like, I'm like, wait, I just did a Half marathon. I'm like, people made it seem so crazy.

[A]

Well, like you don't have to go out. People make things seem so much scarier. And I think that's why people are scared to start. Right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So like, when I thought about running, I was like, wait, wait, I remember like Shelby posted that video and I was like, I can like run as slow as I want to. I'm still gonna do two miles, but like I can run as slow as I want to. And then I look and I'm like, oh, my pace was 10:30. That's actually not bad for a pan.

[B]

That's really good.

[A]

Like, this is great. And so then from there I'm like, oh, I know. Like that's my easiest. Like that's going to be easy. Like that I can do that. And then it's just like working your way up from there. I had interrupted.

[B]

No, I love that. That. That makes me so.

[A]

Changed my life. I was like, why am I making. I don't have to go out and run a seven minute pace right now that I don't wanna do that. But if I make my workout something enjoyable and something I wanna do, I'm gonna do it.

[B]

It's literally from like sports in high school where you're like, wait, I have to get a seven minute mile. And then it's like, no, you don't. It's like, wait, who told you that? I had the same reframe of my mind when I was running and I had like a 12 minute pace and I'm like, wait, I kinda like that though. I could actually do that all day. Why was I gasping for error, about to throw up? Cause I was forcing myself to run so fast and then.

[A]

What are the odds you're not gonna do it the second day? Probably pretty high.

[B]

Yes. Because if you hate it and you're dreading it, you're not looking forward to it. Which is another thing with habits too. Because a lot of the time people like think it has to be bad, like it has to be this really, really hard, crazy thing. But then you're kind of deterring yourself from doing it because it was horrible. Where if you make it like easy and attractive and approachable, then you can always grow and add on to it. That summer I went, I was in a lawsuit that summer, I will say so I was like really into trying anything. That was also the summer I did, I guess the winter I did ice baths like every day.

[A]

But I remember seeing your videos of that too.

[B]

Oh my gosh, it's so Funny looking back. So I'm like, I was going through a hard time, but I couldn't talk about my lawsuit publicly. So I was just like, oh, man, I. I'm a big person that I'll try anything in the name of, like, health or feeling better. And I saw that ice baths could help you regulate your mood. And I was like, I'm gonna do it every day. How I want to do it every day for, like, two months, and I'm gonna see if my mood gets better. And it kind of did. Cause I was like, wait, if I can do this horrible thing every morning, that was so hard. I could do anything. And it made my lawsuit easier. But the second that my lawsuit cleared off, I was like, man, I'm not getting back.

[A]

You're like, I'm not doing the ice bath again.

[B]

Like, I'm not that tortured. I don't need to try it. But I was proud of myself for trying it.

[A]

Well, it's also interesting because I think of, like, when, whenever. I don't know. I've seen this on social media or the Internet or wherever, but if you have something that you're not looking forward to on your to do list, you.

[B]

Should do it first. I have seen that where it's, like, getting the hardest thing out of the way.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's kind of how I feel about in the morning working out. It is something that I love, but it is, like, my hardest thing that I'm doing every day. So right when I'm done with it, I get this, like, immediate win that then there is science behind. If you get small wins, it puts in motion other small wins. So, like, for example, if you make your bed first thing in the morning, that's, like, registering in your brain as a small win. Like, you completed this task, and then it kind of puts you on a trajectory to complete more tasks where it's like, you want to set yourself up for, like, small wins in the morning.

[A]

Do you make your bed every day?

[B]

Every day, Sometimes. When my husband first moved in with me and would, like, sometimes sleep in my bed, I would literally make it over him. I would get so mad. I want to, like. I, like, make happy or just. Tucker.

[A]

This, like, doesn't even feel like a wood, really.

[B]

And he. Oh, my gosh. So my husband has never slept under the covers until dating me, which is the weirdest thing ever. Like, would only sleep on top of the covers because he hates making his bed, but his mom would make him make his bed every morning.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

So he didn't have to make it. He'd sleep on top of it.

[A]

Is that laziness or, like, being a genius?

[B]

Right? I know. I'm like, I don't know how I feel about it. When I would sleep at his house when we were dating, I'm not kidding, he would not let me sleep under the covers. Like, it was like, something where I'm like, is this a deal breaker? Like, this is really weird. Like, just make your bed after a reflect. Yeah. I'm like, this is so weird. And then when you come to my house, I'm like, no, you're getting under the covers. Like, we're not sleeping on top of my comfort.

[A]

It's so weird.

[B]

So his argument is like, I don't want to sleep under the covers anyway. Like, I don't want to make the bed. Right? Which when he sleeps in his room, like, if he falls asleep, like, watching football and I fall asleep reading, like, we'll just sleep in separate rooms. He actually will not go under the covers. Like, he will not unmake a bed.

[A]

That's actually so weird.

[B]

It is so strange. It is actually so strange. Strange. So I think I remember one time I was, like, sleeping over, and I was, like, drinking, and I got under his covers and his bed, and he's like, what are you doing? I was like, what? So I make the bed, and I don't have the expectation for him because I'm like, he really is fighting for his life to just sleep on top of the COVID so he doesn't have to do it anyway, that I already do it. Which is crazy, because making my bed was a small habit that helped me basically start forming other habits. So making your bed's a keystone habit. Which basically means that when you start forming healthy habits in your brain, you're forming, like, a pathway. So when you form that pathway and you understand how to kind of create a habit in the first place, it's almost like a path in the snow. So, like, if you walked in a circle in the snow, you could, like, see the outline. The more that you keep doing it over and over, you have a clear path to follow. So then other habits have an easier time following it. Or another example of this is, say, so many snow habits or snow examples. So say you were pushing, like, a snowball up a hill, and it was really, really hard. Cause it's, like, heavier going up the hill. And you're, like, thinking of that as forming a habit. By the time you get to the top of the hill and push the snowball down it, like, Picks up a bunch of snow, it goes super fast. That's kind of the same with a keystone habit. So when you start creating the habit of making your bed and it feels hard at first to like really stay consistent with, and then one day it doesn't, then it kind of just helps you with other little habits because you've already done a big one. You've already taught your brain kind of like how to respond to it. So making your bed is just like a huge.

[A]

And it feels like an easy, like attainable. It's like, oh, like, yeah, it takes five minutes.

[B]

It's something you can do no matter what.

[A]

What are other keystone habits?

[B]

Exercise is one. So exercise is one that other habits become easier and like just form off of it. So like, say, for example, you start working out, then maybe you start walking more, you start eating healthier. Like when you make want to do the other things, the other healthy choices kind of like come and attach to it. So I'd say those are the two key ones. Anything really, really small is a great, almost like starter habit because it kind of just like caves the way.

[A]

It saves the way the momentum to start other ones. Yeah, okay, that's super interesting. Like, I do feel really good when I make my bed, right?

[B]

It's crazy. Cause you can look at like, what. When you're creating new habits, you want to figure out what the reward is like in your habit loop. So in a habit loop, you have a cue, a routine, and a reward. And it follows the pathway over and over and over until you form a habit. That the cue is basically what is starting the habit, what's triggering the habit loop. So a cue could be like the time of day. It could be a visual cue that you see. It could be a cue, could be like how you're feeling. And what happens next is once you get the cue, you get the routine, which is your actual habitual behavior, which could be anything. Like, if you're actually, like, it could be something that you say, something that you do, different actions, it could be feelings. And then the reward is what's driving the habit loop. Because when you get a cue, you want to complete the habit loop to reach the reward. Okay, so it's kind of crazy is when you create habits or you're looking at your habits, you are completing a habit loop, doing what you've taught yourself to do, because you want the reward within that habit loop. So an example of this could be like, just to fill in the blanks, say Your cue is 3pm during a workday. And that's like the time Monday through Friday, the routine could be going and getting coffee. And then the reward is you have like a little bit more energy, you feel more aware, awake, but you're not going and getting coffee to, to have that. Well, you are getting it to get more energy. But for example, like you at 3pm you want that feeling of like a pickme up. Where you taught yourself getting coffee is going to give you that pickme up. But you could also go on a walk and that could give you that pick me up. Or you could go and socialize for a little bit and that could give you a pick me up. So you basically, when you are following through, inhabit loops. When you can understand what your cue, routine and reward are, you can understand why you're doing something and then you can change any of your habits. I forget why I started saying that, because there was something else that I was going to say after that.

[A]

It's super interesting though. So like if, like if I want my body to look different, it's just like figuring out like oh, I could eat healthier, I could like stop drinking sugary drinks, I could start exercising, I could just go for more like leisure walks. Like there's so many things that you can do to get to that reward.

[B]

Yes. And you could look at bad habits that you're doing and replace when you want to change a habit, you figure out what your habit loop is and you fig once you figure out what you're doing it for, you can switch out your routine for what's going to still get you there. So like for example, when a good example of a habit is like when people get stressed out and say that's their cue and maybe they struggle with say stress eating as the routine. So like they go and eat and their reward is they get spikes in dopamine from eating. And what they really want there is their stress and they wanna feel happy. But they taught themselves that doing this will get them that spike in dopamine. Where I'll like take a habit loop and dissect it and say okay, if that's what you're craving, you just wanna feel better because of your stress. But you've taught yourself this habit. You can swap out the routine and try something else, like calling a friend, going on a walk. But when people try to change their habits, a lot of the times the first thing that you do is not gonna work. Cause everyone's different. There could be like 10 different things. It's just understanding and trying and plugging and playing with different things. Like for example, my older sister, when she gets stressed out, she loves talking to people. Like that will help her.

[A]

So you said talking shit about other people?

[B]

Oh, no. My older sister's like an angel on earth and I'm like, she is so funny. She actually I was helping her make a nighttime routine because she has a 10 month old and she had to go to the hospital and get stitches because she was so proud. She was doing her nighttime routine and she like tripped in the garage and like cut her ankle open and was telling me about it. And like, I feel really bad, but I mean, I guess you were doing a really good job. Yeah, but when she gets stressed, she like loves talking to people. So if she had bad habits, I'd be like, oh, you should call a friend first instead of doing like whatever, like destructive or bad behavior that you're doing. Whereas for me, I hate talking when I'm upset. Like that would be torture for me to be like, oh, let me call someone and talk about it.

[A]

That sounds horrible to me.

[B]

Right where that would never work for me, but it might work for someone else. But I can, if I write or if I read or if I go on a walk, I can calm down down. So I can find positive swaps to my habits. Knowing myself and like understanding, oh, I can try this, or oh, I could do this differently. So and if you like say you were like, okay, I want to work on health specifically and I want to create a habit, you'd literally sit and plug and play with the cue, routine and reward. So you could say, okay, right now I want to work. My goal is that I want to feel confident in my body. For that you could be like, okay, the first thing I'm going to try is I'm going to start going on just a 10 minute walk or a 20 minute walk. Every day you'd want to set a cue so you could say, okay, every day at 12 o' clock, I know that's when I'm going to have lunch. Or that's like around the time I have lunch, I'm going to do the routine of going outside, going on a 20 minute walk, listening to an audiobook. And then my reward is I'm slowly working towards getting to the place where I feel confident. Or you could say, okay, I'm going to try that habit. And then also every night before bed, my cue will be when I'm brushing my teeth. My routine will be saying like three positive affirmations in the mirror because you can start rewiring your identity with like that repetitive, positive self talk, talk. And then the reward there is you're still working towards that goal. So when you pick a goal for yourself, you can kind of backtrack and be like, what little, little things could I try to build as habits that will help me reach it?

[A]

Oh, my gosh. I'm like, there are so many things that come to, like my brain when you say all these things, you guys. Every year I tell myself I'll get better about meal planning. And every year, life gets busy and it kind of falls apart. So what finally clicked for me is realizing meals don't have to look one specific way. They just have to fit your life and your lifesty. And that's what Marley Spoon does really well. What I love is that Marley Spoon actually adapts with you. Some nights you cook, some nights you heat, and some nights you need dinner done fast. They've got options for all of it so that meals fit your schedule and not the other way around. And it helps me eat well without overthinking it. Everything's chef designed and made with quality ingredients and balanced enough to feel good about. And another thing I love is that they have over a hundred recipes to choose from each week. We're talking comforting classes, sticks to fresh, balanced dishes. Marley Spoon has tons of options in their marketplace, from meal shortcuts and drinks to fresh groceries that you can add on each week. And for those nights when you need dinner, like yesterday, and you're like, wait, how did it get so late? I need to do bath time like I need the meal done. Marley Spoons prepared meals are exactly what they sound like. Very convenient, delicious, and on the table in minutes. Just what we need. I mean, literally, lifesavers. When you don't feel like cooking this new year, fast track your way to eating well with Marley Spoon. Head to Marley spoon.com offer/Sunday for up to 25 free meals. That's right. Up to 25 free meals with Marley spoon. That's Marley spoon.com offer/ Sunday for up to 25 free meals. Some people might call me dramatic. Other people are just going to call me pregnant. I brought Ollipop. A few cans of the Shirley Temple Olipop pop all the way to my family's vacation. Okay? And I have not been mad about it. What was my bag over a few pounds maybe, but it was well worth it. So here I have the Olipop Shirley Temple flavor, and it tastes so good, you guys. Olipop is a new kind of soda that combines the classic soda taste with the benefits of a functional ingredient blend to support digestive health. Olipop is reimagining soda with high fiber and low sugar. And they don't have to skimp on the taste. Okay, this taste of this Shirley Temple flavor. I love all the Ollipop flavors, but this is just my recent pregnancy craving. And it tastes so good and so fresh and I know it's not packed full of bad things. It's actually meant to help me. This is an original mocktail. So like Olipop releases flavor just in time for dry January, although I have been dry for quite a few months now. And it's the original mocktail that made not drinking more fun. Although I would have these at any time of the day. And it's a flavor that everyone can feel good about. It supports digestive health with real ingredients and less sugar. And you guys, I mean, prebiotics, botanicals, plant fiber, it's just a new kind of soda and I'm here for it. I mean, what other cans of soda can you say that supports your digestive health? Not many. Right now. You guys can get a free can of Ollipop. You can buy two cans of Ollipop in store and they'll pay you back for one. It works on any flavor, any retailer. And The URL is drinkolipop.com sundae. Olipop is sold online at drinkollipop.com and Amazon and available in the soda aisle and with the chilled beverages at thousands of retailers nationwide, including Walmart and Target. So cheers to not only being in Mexico, but also bringing my favorite drink to Mexico. Cheers to Ollie Pop Shirley Town.

[B]

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[A]

I feel like as a mom, like people say, like, oh, I don't have a lot of time for myself. So like what for the especially for the people listening. What for busy moms, do you think is like some of the best habits to like start creating or like things to change?

[B]

I think the number one Habit for any busy mom would, would be finding a small pocket of time that you can set for just you. So it's kind of like a broad answer, but basically creating whether it's in the morning or night or during nap time or just a set time where you can focus on yourself. So building 30 minutes into your day. So for example, like say you have to wake up earlier to create that time for yourself. Within that time you could sit and look at your own life and say, here's where I'm struggling or here's where I want to improve and this is what time I can use to do it. So I think the habit of actually sitting and creating that pocket of time for yourself is the most important. But then depending on each other, tell.

[A]

Your husband, like, can I have an hour to go and think about some of these habits I need to create?

[B]

Yeah, like even sitting with like your partner and saying, okay, every day at 5pm this is like a non negotiable, I'm gonna go in the basement or I'm gonna go in my room and close the door. And this is time where you can then like just for 30 minutes, focus on yourself. Yourself. Or say you want to wake up early and create that time. But one of my favorite habits for moms and this is just based off of like my mom, my younger sister's mom, my older sister's mom. And where I've seen them struggle most, where I've helped them is there's no time for themselves. So first creating that time, but then also little things like help their mental health throughout the day. So like they get really stressed out with like, like there's so much going on. And having a child's like unpredictable because like you don't know if they're going to wake up and be like an.

[A]

Angel or like you don't know anything.

[B]

Yeah, you can't predict it all the time. So having like one small habit I like teaching is one when, well one of them's out of nap time. But when they do nap, having a five minute quick tidy up and that's it. So it's like not overwhelming. It's five minutes. You're not cleaning your entire house. It's okay, what small space can I get done in five minutes? That's going to help me feel less overwhelmed. Or creating time in your nighttime routine to do that. Just like a 10 minute pick me up at the end of the day once the baby's asleep. Finding those small little things that help with like your mental health but then also for moms, finding time for yourself, whether it is literally five minutes, minutes, 30 minutes to do something. Say you want to start journaling, you.

[A]

Want to have time to read cleaning. Yeah, because I'm during nap time, like doing things that like they didn't get to when like their child was awake. And I'm like, but when I think about that, I'm like, and that's an hour. Like you're still dedicating towards other people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So that I can only say like, that's why moms feel like their cup is like so empty. I'm like, take that hour and like try and dedicate it to yourself in whatever way. Even if that's like what, like five minutes of cleaning. Like, oh, just do it. Like set a timer for five minutes and then you're done.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or it's like set a timer for 10 minutes and journal and then clean.

[B]

Yeah, I think too, I like the habit stack of walking and like rotting on social media. Because you get to do like something that you really want to do while working on like your health. If that's like a goal that you have for yourself. But I also think that like from my perspective just with my sisters, moms put everyone else before themselves. So being able to create a small pocket of time for yourself, really, if it's only five minutes or 10 minutes, that will be, be like life changing where no one can interrupt it. Which is why I'm such a big advocate for waking up early because usually you can like outbeat everyone. Like everyone's asleep. So like no one can like all of a sudden need you to do something. Like, you don't need to like make food for your child. You don't need to like help them with the task or like do homework. Like nothing's gonna pop up if you create that time. But then also depending on when a child goes to bed, you could create that time for yourself at night too. Yeah, I'm just more of an advocate for the morning. But really it's whatever works.

[A]

For the popping up thing is probably the, the thing that I see like the most problems with as a mom because I'm like, oh. Like I could easily be like, oh, every day I'm gonna wake up at five. But if I'm like, one day my daughter's like, I wanna wake up at 6am and I'm like, oh, there goes my entire routine. Like now I feel shitty the rest of the day where it's like, oh, what is a way I can incorporate my daughter into my wellness routine. Is that going for a stroller walk, like during her nap time instead? Or is that like going for a walk with friends? That way she can see friends and I'm still getting a walk in. So I feel like, like that's like the hardest part is like, how can you make a routine that's like uninterrupted.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like. Or not gonna have interruptions for that.

[B]

That's where like a plan B routine would come in. So I have my set routine, which when something pops up. So like, for example, say I have a doctor's appointment and I know that I can't go on a walk the next morning. Or say just anything happens, I'll have my normal routine. But I'm not like sick. Like, it's nothing like crazy that I know I can still do it and I'll have a plan B where, okay, I can't walk, but I know that at lunchtime I'm going on a walk. So like, for you, you could say, okay, here's things I'm doing every single morning. Say Scotty wakes up early. What I'm going to do then is go to my plan B where I know we're gonna go on a walk after lunch.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Or say for my nighttime routine, what I do is if I get home, like, if I'm going to dinner, someone's birthday, and I don't have like an hour to reset my whole house, I'll say, okay, the next day. I can plan in advance. I'm not gonna go on that hour walk. I know I can push it and I can use that time to make sure I'm still aligned. I still feel good. It's kind of having like a little bit. Even if it's like a 20 minute routine, having that routine down and then a plan B of okay, I can't do everything, but I can still do this one thing and I'm still going to feel really good about it. Or I can add it in somewhere else.

[A]

It's almost just like sitting down and planning is like the hardest part.

[B]

Yeah. And kind of like knowing where to start. That's why if.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

For anyone listening, my number one piece of advice is to start. But start so small with one small habit that you could do rain or shine. Even if you feel really great, even if you like feel motivated, you don't feel motivated. Like making your bed. Like one small thing that, that you can do every single day. Because then you'll be able to actually see how you're building it as a habit. You'll run into like, little challenges and you'll work through it and then you'll be set up for success. To build on top of that or understand, okay, now I want to try adding in a new thing and I'm gonna start small and slowly start progressing based off of that. So, like, starting so important, but just starting small. Because especially with New Year's, two people are like, okay, I'm working out five days a week. I'm waking up every day where you pack on like 10 things and then you're like, why did I think that was like, what you set yourself up for failure, where if you start small, you're setting yourself up for success. Have you ever done where like, you decide you're gonna get rid of all of your clothes and like, go through your entire closet and then you get like an hour in and you're like, I hate myself. Like, why did I right think that I could do that? That's like my favorite example of it's like a really sporadic choice that you make. Whereas if you said, okay, every night before I go to bed, I'm gonna go through one drawer, I'm gonna go through one section of my closet.

[A]

So it feels like so much smarter, right? Like, it feels like, duh, like, why would I not do that? But.

[B]

But it takes a second to like, see that that's what the key is to it working for you.

[A]

Is it? Because it's not like instant gratification.

[B]

That's another thing too, that a lot of people, the rewards for these habits, like creating the habit of working out, you're not going to see those rewards up front. It is more of a long term thing. But having those like, small wins that you're building on. So like, for example, say day, you want to start getting like your room organized and having a clean space, but you start by making your bed, you find kind of what your reward is that you can kind of hold on to that every day and see that. So, like, I love taking a picture of my bed when it's made because I just feel like, like, it's like, wait, I'm like, actually have my life together. Like, I'm just one of those people that makes my bed and that's a reward.

[A]

Am I better than everyone?

[B]

It literally is. I'm like, oh my God, that's me. To my husband, I'm like standing over him. I'm like, he's probably gonna keep sleeping for another 30 minutes and I'll be out the door. But it's like those little wins, it really is it does come down to, to like you can't feel the win from a long term goal. But on that note, something else that I really like to do if I have a harder habit is all by myself or like have little rewards that I'm working towards. Okay. So like say I'm starting a habit where I like after my nose job I was waking up. I wasn't waking up at 5am for six weeks because I had nothing to do. Like I was like, wait, I literally can't work out. Like I'm just bored. So when I came down to I was cleared to work out again. I'm like, hey, now I'm gonna, instead of just going and waking up at 5am, I'm gonna give myself like two to three weeks. So like slowly get back there. And because it's a harder habit and it's kind of a long term thing I'm working towards, I started getting myself little things at the end of the week that I'm like, okay, like I know like at the end of the week I'm getting my favorite, like I'm getting myself a book. I'm going to go to the bookstore or oh, I'm going to get my favorite coffee. Like things to look forward to to give you that reward when the real rewards kind of like pushed off and something that you don't get gratification from like every single day.

[A]

It sounds like you also need like self discipline too. Right? Like you could easily go to the bookstore.

[B]

Yeah. And just be like wait.

[A]

And be like wait, I just actually need a new book. Book. But like having the, I don't know, like self discipline to be like, no, I'm going to follow through and if I don't like I don't get that reward.

[B]

And the discipline comes from the small habits also.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Instead of like the sporadic big life changes. It's when you tell yourself you're going to make your bed every day and you do it and you follow through. You're building discipline like you're building a habit but you're building that discipline at the same time. So they kind of go hand in hand. Where you'd rather focus on building discipline then like, like I'd rather be disciplined than motivated because I know that I'll show up and do what I tell myself that I'm gonna do 10 times outta 10 even if I'm not motivated.

[A]

Well yeah, motivation can like also like if you get to the point where you want to, like health wise, you're like, well I'm no longer Motivated, then I would. I would just give up.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's no point in, like, continuing to work. So it's like the discipline matters more than the motivation.

[B]

Yeah. And building the discipline. Motivation. A lot of people get stuck on motivation. Cause they're like, well, I just don't feel, like, motivated to do this. Where I feel motivated, like, like, maybe 50% of the time of my life.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

Like, I. Habits are crazy too, because you don't need motivation. Habits are like automatic behaviors that you. You just choose to do it that you, like. Like, you don't even have to, like, have a second thought. So, like, one of my favorite examples is like, you wash your hands after you go to the bathroom. Because that is a habit. You would never have a second thought about it. You know what I mean? Like, you'd never be like, eh, just not gonna wash my hands today. You don't have to think and make that choice. Cause you've already made it so many times. It is a behavior that you do no matter what. Yes. That's like, the basis of why you. Like, when you create handpicked habits, the goal is to have it become automatic. Which is also why there's habits that we don't even realize that we can change. Because they become so automatic that when you start thinking about it, you can backtrack on it. But wait, what was I gonna say about that? Oh, for example, I hurt my foot, actually, in the stupidest way ever. Have you heard of candlesticking?

[A]

No.

[B]

Okay. I googled it because I was gonna say this on my Instagram story, like, oh, I hurt myself candlesticking. Then I looked it up, and it was like a messed up definition. So it's. It's not. If you look it up, it's not what it is. It's like in gymnastics, when you, like, put your feet in the air, like, you're laying on your back. My sister told me to do it to get pregnant, and she's a baby. So I was like, oh, I'm on a candlestick. Like, after you try to do it.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

So I was doing that, and I flipped over backwards and hit my foot and hurt my foot so bad, and I felt so dumb. I'm like, the candlesticking is gonna be the thing that took me out. But so this morning, because working out is such an established. And Waking up at 5am is such an established habit, it didn't even clock in my head that, like, I hurt my foot and I probably shouldn't go to the gym because I was like, Literally limping around the house. And I'm like, this is so dumb, but I went to the gym this morning. And when I got there, I'm like. I'm like, wait a minute. Should I have done this? Like, I just.

[A]

Like, you just did it because it was. You're just used to doing that.

[B]

There's just not a second thought. Like, I'm like, oh, I wake up and I go to the gym, and then I'm literally, like, limping. I'm like, maybe I should have thought, like, for 10 seconds, maybe I shouldn't have done this.

[A]

I want to get to that point of my routine where I'm like, wait, I don't have to do this, but, like, I'm doing it.

[B]

You just do it because you want to. And that's like, what's so cool about, like, when I felt like I understood habits, I felt like I understood truly how to change my life. Because when. If I were to tell you, like, okay, if you wake up every single day at 7:00am consistently, you will, like, feel the actual benefits of it, and you will change your life and you will become a morning person. And then three months later, you did that and you were like, okay, I am like, I wake up now at this time without forcing myself, without dreading it. Like, I just wake up this time. You'd be able to see, like, okay, anything that I want to do, if I just trust the science. And it's going to happen.

[A]

Yeah, it'll happen.

[B]

And that's kind of how I changed my entire life too, because I just was like, I gotta trust the science. Like, whoever wrote this book about habits. Because I learned about habits originally from a book that I just got off Amazon because I was, like, so desperate to change my life. I'm like, okay, this guy's so hard.

[A]

Now I need the book.

[B]

No, it's called the Power of Habit.

[A]

Okay? I've heard of it.

[B]

It is so boring and sober. So it's like, you got to just know that going into it that you're gonna be like, wait, I actually hate this. But then you'll, like, wait, I. I'll.

[A]

Do it while I'm doing something. Enjoy.

[B]

Exactly. Perfect. It's like, perfect. But when I read that, I'm like, okay, this guy is so smart. He already did all the research. If I just trust what he's saying and just try, I think my life will change. And it completely did. Like, it's like, I'm like, wait, everyone read that.

[A]

Wait, this is actually, like, right?

[B]

I'm like, Shoot. I like, who else is really? That's when I got into self improvement too. Cause I'm like, wait, all these self.

[A]

Improvement books are actually insane though. Like the, like, how to be a badass. I remember reading that book one day and I was like, oh, I'm actually, I'm gonna change my life. And like just the, like the manifestation of like knowing like, no, I'm going to change. Like, no, I'm actually going to do this. And then you get it done. You're like, wait. Shit. Like, that was like real.

[B]

Wait. You're like, wait, that was kind of easy. Like, I swear, understanding, like what to do. Like the first step is the hardest part. And then like there's like mental roadblocks that we build in our brain that we don't even realize when we develop the mental roadblock or like the thoughts that we have.

[A]

The mental aspect, I think is the hard, hardest part.

[B]

Yeah. And then once you realize, like, I'll think, like, every single person has different upbringing, different experiences, like, based on like relationships. They had families, they were raised in religion. There are so many things that could create thought patterns in your brain that if you stop and you're like, wait, why do I think that way? Why do I think that I couldn't wake up early if I wanted to? Why? Yeah, do I think, like when you start challenging it and realize that you can hand pick your thoughts, you can handpick the actions that you do every day, like, you can change, change anything. It is just so powerful. Like you could change anything about your life.

[A]

Yeah, it's like, oh, if you don't like something, just change it.

[B]

Yeah, but it's like, wait, change it by one small step. When I think about what habits did for me over the course last five years, every single area of my life has changed. But if you like, look, zoom in. It started with like a small choice to wake up a little bit earlier and to go on a walk and then you can build from there. But it's really like the small choice where now I'm looking, I change, changed my body, my brain, my thoughts, my financial position, my career, my relationship. Like every single thing I've been able.

[A]

To improve based off of like starting one thing.

[B]

Yes, one small intentional habit will change your life. And that's like, that's the key takeaway. One small choice is all you need really to create massive change.

[A]

So that's that. As we're wrapping up, I'm like, this is my last question heading into 2026. What is the biggest piece of advice you have would give to somebody who wants to like change their life or like change one thing about them.

[B]

My biggest piece of advice is to sit down and find one small thing that's realistic that you could keep consistent to start and that is sustainable that you could show up and do every single day regardless of how you're feeling. So for example, making your bed, going on a 20 minute walk, you want to make whatever habit you choose attractive and easy. If I could suggest one habit to start with which I would is I, I'm, I'm obviously so grateful for where I started and where I got to. But looking back, I didn't prioritize like any type of self love or like thought pattern habits until I started changing my life in July of 2020. And until December of 2020 I did not try one thing for like my actual mental health where I would suggest starting to write say or read affirmations every day as the small habit that people start with. Because you, you, your thoughts control everything. Your thoughts control your actions, your feelings, who you show up as. So intentionally creating positive thoughts about yourself, your body, your life, your abilities. That is going to be the most like incredible beneficial like you can truly transform your life by the thoughts that you tell yourself. Because if you think about it, say you've told yourself for years, like I'm ugly, I'm. I am lazy, I can't do this, I can't do that. You believe those things because you've created a thought pattern of it. But if you were like, wait a second, I'm just going to tell myself every day like I am someone who makes healthy choices, I love my body, I am proud of myself, I'm hardworking over and over. If you tell yourself that, you will believe it, you literally will believe it and it will change your feelings and it will change your actions which will change your life. So my advice would be to start small with one thing that you can do every single day. Show up and do that thing. You're going to build discipline. But also if you're looking for a specific habit to start with, I'd say either writing affirmations or putting a sticky note on your mirror and reading it every single night before bed. Little affirmations or writing out affirmations in your notes app and putting it as your screensaver and reading it. So like a habit loop for that could be cue anytime that you look at your phone routine, just reading through five affirmations on your screensaver reward your slowly changing your thought patterns or your Habits or if you want to write them. My best advice to start writing habits for affirmations is Q. If you do something in the morning every day, like you make coffee every single day, or you let your dogs out every single day, single day, take whatever habit you do every single day and make that your cue. So right after you do it, so say cue, make coffee routine. Write in a journal that's left right next to that coffee maker. Five positive things that you want to identify with, five positive qualities. And then your reward is you're slowly working on those thoughts.

[A]

So interesting, man. Wow. I feel motivated.

[B]

Okay, good. I'm glad. I love talking about this. I literally talk about, like, habits, anything. I feel like my family gets so sick of me that they were probably so happy when I started doing social media because they're like, okay, finally she's talking to someone.

[A]

I want to have you back on the show, like, once you get pregnant and, like, once you're, like, starting a family and all that. Because I'm, like, gonna. I want to pick your brain even more. Like, once some of these, like, outside factors, like, start to derail you a little bit.

[B]

I'm so excited. I'm sure my sisters are really excited, too. Yeah, I cannot wait. I think that will be such a fun phase for me to be, like, stumped first, second and like, oh, I gotta figure this out. But, yeah, I would love to come back.

[A]

Where can the people find you on social media?

[B]

On social media, on Instagram and Tik Tok. My username is just Shelby Saco 5. And then I have a podcast called Sad to Savage. If you're listening to this way in the future, I have a book coming out, but not until 2027. So I'm like, oh, man.

[A]

You're like, okay, like, stay tuned. Well, thank you so much for coming on. I hope you guys enjoyed and we look forward to seeing you next time. Send it.

[B]

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