
Bobby is now closer than ever – and yet he keeps slipping through Kirat's grasp. After being pushed to breaking point, she makes the life changing decision to confront him – and discovers the truth...
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Alexei Mostros
Thank you for listening to Sweet Bobby. This podcast has been on an incredible journey since we released it back in 2021, and since then I've gone on to investigate a whole range of other stories. There's hoaxed about one of the most serious conspiracies in the uk and my search for the people behind it. Who trolled Amber, which digs into the bot campaign against Amber heard during the celebrity trial of the century, which Johnny Depp. And this autumn I released Elon's Spies, all about the private investigators used by one of the most powerful men on the planet, Elon Musk. So if you liked what you heard with Sweet Bobby and you want to try another of my investigative podcasts, just search for Tortoise Investigates. That's Tortoise Investigates. It's the home of all our best investigations, all in one place. To get people excited about Boost Mobile's new nationwide 5G network, we're offering unlimited talk, text and data for $25 a month. Forever. Even if you have a baby, Even if your baby has a baby, even if you grow old and wrinkly and you start repeating yourself, even if you start repeating yourself, even if you're on your deathbed and you need to make one last call or text, right? Or text the long lost son you abandoned at birth, you'll still get unlimited talk, text and Data for just $25 a month.
Kirat
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Alexei Mostros
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Simran Bogle
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Kirat
It's all a blur. My Aunt Ilsa called me and she just said, get to the hospital. The doctor came in and told us that there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye.
Simran Bogle
This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series from the makers of Sword and Scale launches March 3rd. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.
Kirat
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Alexei Mostros
Hey, how you doing? Hey dog. Oh my goodness. Pretty much since this podcast started, since I first got hold of Kierat's witness statement back in June, I've Wanted to speak to the man at the center of this whole scam. I'm talking about the real Bobby. He looks like a puppy.
Kirat
I thought he was a puppy.
Alexei Mostros
The guy whose identity the catfisher used to trick Kirat for all those years. And my wife is like, no, no. Because even after months of looking into this story, I still don't know how much Bobby knows about the deception, about the catfisher, about everything. For weeks, Amrit, a lawyer who's been helping Kierat, has been trying to set up a meeting. And then one weekend, as I was watching TV with my children, I get a call. Oh, is that Bobby? Yeah, the real Bobby.
Kirat
Hi, Alex.
Alexei Mostros
Bobby wants to meet. It is an insane story. So Gary, my producer Amrit, Kirat's friend, and I, we head down to Brighton, and standing by a table waiting to meet us, there he is in the flesh. It's Bobby. And look, I can't lie, it's a pretty weird experience. It's like the main character from a film you've been watching on Netflix suddenly appearing in front of you. This handsome, charismatic guy from Kenya, just as Kirat described him. We talk for hours that night in a busy steakhouse just outside the city center. And I get a lot of answers, but I can't use them because Bobby still isn't sure about an interview. He asks that this meeting be off the record. So we leave for London without knowing, ultimately if he trusts us and if he trusts us to tell his story. London Victoria.
Kirat
This train is formed of four coaches.
Alexei Mostros
So that's where we left it. We might speak to them next week. They said that they'd think about it. I really hope that they agree, but fingers crossed, here's our train. But then, and sometimes this just happens, we get lucky. Bobby agrees to an interview. Maybe he just felt like this was the right time to speak, or maybe Amrit was really persuasive. I don't know. But whatever the case, we head down to Brighton again, this time to Bobby's friend's house. A friend with a very sweet dog.
Simran Bogle
He is the best dog in the world.
Alexei Mostros
And these questions that I've had in my head for months, I finally get to ask them. What's your name?
Simran Bogle
My name is Bobby.
Alexei Mostros
How old are you?
Simran Bogle
I've just turned 37.
Alexei Mostros
Have you ever been a cardiologist?
Simran Bogle
No, not at all.
Alexei Mostros
Have you ever been in witness protection?
Simran Bogle
Not that I can say. On a podcast, No, I haven't. I haven't.
Alexei Mostros
Have you ever been in a hospital for a long period of time?
Simran Bogle
Not Longer than a day.
Alexei Mostros
Have you ever been in a relationship with Harker et Assy?
Simran Bogle
Absolutely not.
Alexei Mostros
I'm Alexei Mostros from Tortoise Media. You're listening to Sweet Bobby, Episode three Confession.
Kirat
I was really excited. I was obviously watching his flight land. I was like, oh my God, look, look, look, look, he's coming, he's coming kind of thing. It was like that and I was really excited.
Alexei Mostros
It's 2018 and Kierat is waiting for Bobby to arrive in London. It's nearly eight years since he first approached her on Facebook and they became friends.
Kirat
It was such a strange feeling to know that he was here in the uk.
Alexei Mostros
Three years since Bobbie told Kirat he was in love with her and they started a long distance relationship. This is the man Kirat wanted to marry to start a family with.
Kirat
My mind was racing, as in, like, how's it going to feel? Oh my God, is it going to be awkward? All those questions, am I going to be good enough?
Alexei Mostros
Finally, he makes good on his promise. And a few days after Kierat's birthday in February, he arrives. For Kierat, this is huge. It's the moment when she thinks that her dreams might actually come true. Instead, it's where her nightmare really begins, because the excuses don't stop.
Kirat
So when he first came to London, he was staying at the Marriott in South Kensington. This is South Kensington, which is just opposite.
Alexei Mostros
Bobby tells Kierat that he's staying at an exclusive hotel in South Kensington, but he still refuses to see her. And at that point, why won't he come down and see you?
Kirat
He's not ready to. He's not ready to see me.
Alexei Mostros
Why not?
Kirat
Well, for a long time, well, he. Mentally he was in the right headspace. And then later on, a couple of weeks later, we find out he wasn't feeling well again. Slowly.
Alexei Mostros
Until this point in the story, most of what had happened to Kira had happened online between New York and London in voice notes, messages and phone calls. But now the story shifts to somewhere more tangible. Bobby and Kierat are in the same city, seemingly only a short car ride away from each other. And Kirat feels like everything is finally in touching distance. And yet, like that Greek myth where a man is condemned to spend eternity right next to a tree whose delicious fruit he can almost touch, but not quite. Kira finds that however close Bobby gets, he always ultimately slips through her fingers. Like when she went to the Marriott Hotel one time to see him.
Kirat
So I'd asked for him at reception and they told me he wasn't here. And I felt sick because, you know, Bobby had lied to me so much in the past and I was beginning to question everything all over again. And I, instead of messaging him, I messaged Simran to say, I'm here at the Marriott. I've come to deliver a fat flower to him, a rose to him, and to say, you know, it's okay, it's just me. And they're telling me that he's not here.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat was in touch with Simran, her younger cousin, a lot at this point. Simran was often the person that Kirat would turn to for advice about Bobbie, or at least to tell her what was going on.
Kirat
And he's messaged me to say, is that you downstairs? They've just called up to say that somebody's downstairs asking for you. And he explained that he told them that he doesn't want to be seen by anybody if anyone asks for him, that nobody should know that he's here.
Alexei Mostros
And what was going through your head at that time? Did you think that he was upstairs and didn't want to see you? Did you entertain the possibility that he might not have been here at all?
Kirat
No, I just. I was just upset that he wouldn't see me. I wasn't thinking that he wasn't here.
Alexei Mostros
Bobby seems overwhelmed by being back in the UK after so many years in witness protection. And then his grandmother becomes ill, meaning he has to spend some time with her. But then a more serious obstacle comes up. Bobby says that a cancer he's been battling has returned. He says that's the real reason he can't face seeing Kirat and Bobby's friends and family. Well, they're saying the same thing. They're telling Kira, don't push Bobby too far, don't nag him, don't be overbearing. Yes, he's in the uk, but give him some space. The pressure feels like it's coming at Kirat from all sides. Even though she'd asked him not to, Bobby had told her family that he's in the uk. So naturally they expected Kirat to bring him home for a visit. But he still won't see her. So she starts covering for Bobby. She tells her family she has met him, that she's looking after him.
Kirat
I was like, you need to explain to my mum. I said, I'm covering your tracks everywhere. I'm lying for you. I'm covering up for you. You're putting me in an awful position and you're supposed to love me.
Alexei Mostros
I think this is one of the Hardest bits of Kierat's story for me to listen to. Bobby could do almost anything at this stage, think up any excuse and he could still keep control. So for a whole summer, Bobby keeps Kira on tenterhooks, keeps breaking promises, keeps lying to her. And Kiret was forced to keep up the pretence, telling her mum that she's going to see Bobby. And instead sitting in her car alone for hours and all this gaslighting, it eventually begins to loosen her grip on reality.
Kirat
I said, I don't care what's going to happen to me today because I don't know how to face my family anymore. I wanted to go home and tell everybody everything and say how he was behaving, but at the same time I knew if I did that I'm just giving to my family and community. Everyone would lay into me and I've just had nothing left to show for myself. So I would rather have just not existed and I didn't care what happened to me. And I just said to him, I'm just gonna go walking, I don't know. I said, I'm gonna leave my car here, lock it, probably going to drop my car keys down a drain somewhere. And I said, I'm just going to go walking and I don't not going to come back. I said, you can explain to my family what happened to me and why it happened.
Alexei Mostros
What did you mean that you weren't going to come back?
Kirat
I don't know, I just didn't know what. I don't know where my head was at. I wasn't going to hurt myself, but I was just going to wander around and don't know, something happened to me, it did or it didn't. If I ended up somewhere, I don't, I just don't know where my head was at. I was so distraught. I just didn't know how to keep going back home and keeping up this pretence and you know, you don't want to do anything to yourself, you love your family, but I just didn't understand how I was such a horrible person. I've seen him through everything, through strokes, heart transplant, cancer. You know, I never imagined myself in this position and I never imagined that you would waver when it comes to committing to me.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat was becoming increasingly fragile. When I think to how Kirat was before she met Bobbie, this happy, vibrant person with so much going on for her, reduced to this broken my heart.
Kirat
Broken, broken, Shattered my dreams. I thought you loved me. I love you, but I can't do this. I can't be pushed aside while you think that I'm supposed to be a part of your life. There were loads of excuses. Mostly like, I'm just getting this done today. I need this done today. I need to Hospital stuff. There was hospital stuff he wanted me to be at with him, but then he'd go himself.
Alexei Mostros
Can I ask you a question that I think might, you know, a lot of listeners listening might want to ask as well, which is, you know, you've been waiting years to see this. This guy. Fair enough. He might want to go to hospital appointments on his own or get his house clean. But if he's going to the dentist, like, why doesn't he meet you for a coffee outside the station before he goes in? Why doesn't what? It doesn't, it doesn't make sense that he didn't want to see you, given your history.
Kirat
He wasn't saying that he didn't want to see me. He was saying he wasn't ready to see me.
Alexei Mostros
On one level, Kirat believed what Bobbie was telling her, that his health was fragile. But on a deeper level, she knew something was wrong.
Kirat
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Simran Bogle
Get ready for your next true crime binge.
Kirat
It's all a blur. My Aunt Elsa called me and she just said, get to the hospital.
Alexei Mostros
The doctor came in and told us.
Kirat
That there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye.
Simran Bogle
This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series from the makers of Sword and Scale launches March 3rd. Subscribe now. On Apple Podcasts and Spotify, opinions will always differ.
Kirat
And so they should, because everyone draws from different influences. Parents, peers, politics, education, media, culture. What you believe depends on who you believe. Financial Times readers know that their opinions are Reliable because they're shaped by trusted journalism. Robust opinions, confident decisions. Source FT to subscribe, go to FT.comSourceFT.
Alexei Mostros
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Kirat
I think there was a particular phone call where it didn't sound like he was here because he is quite noisy and I just felt something was wrong. I'd emailed a private investigator, so, yeah, I didn't want to know anything too much. All I wanted was his current address because my gut told me he wasn't in Kensington.
Alexei Mostros
Yeah, Kierat hired a private investigator. She's at the point now where she needs to know the truth, but she doesn't ask him for much, only for Bobby's most recent address. And the investigator comes back with something concrete, but it's not in Kensington. Bobby's in Brighton, 80 miles away. And Kiret doesn't know what to do with this information. Bobbie had to be hiding something, she knew that. But What? Finally, on 9 June 2018, Kiret reached breaking point. She had been getting ready to go to Birmingham with her mum, but when she mentioned this to Bobby over the phone, he hung up. He wasn't happy. Kira had been planning to go shopping, but this argument had ruined that. So not for the first time, she got into her car just to go for a drive and clear her head. But this time it wasn't aimless.
Kirat
So I just thought I was not in the mood to go to Westfield anymore and I thought I'd go to just go for a drive. Went up onto the motorway and as I was driving, I got to the M25, saw signs for Gatwick and I thought, you know, screw it, I've got the address. Why don't I just go to Brighton and just see him?
Alexei Mostros
Kirit decides it's time to confront him. And when I heard the story for the first time, I was willing her on go to Brighton. I was thinking, be brave, just do it. Because how much grief can one woman take? This deceit had been going on now for eight years and the catfisher showed no signs of stopping. If Kierat didn't do something herself to drag out the truth, there's no reason to believe that things just wouldn't have kept going.
Kirat
So I just Thought, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna show him that there's nothing to be scared of. So I thought, I'm just going to go, what's he going to do? What's the worst that's going to happen?
Alexei Mostros
When we were making this podcast, I hired a car and made that same journey with Kira sitting in the passenger seat. From Hounslow, North West London to Brighton. It takes about two and a half hours. So we had plenty of time to talk through what happened on the same journey three years before. And it must have been as well, a kind of sense that the present situation was intolerable. You couldn't carry on as you. As you were doing.
Kirat
Yeah, you just. How can you be in the same place as me, just miles away from me and not want to see me after everything that we've been through? So I was driving down and he kept on calling and he kept on calling, and I could see the messages popping up on the screen as I was driving down. And I was like, when I get to a service station, I'll call you. And this was the service station I pulled into.
Alexei Mostros
It's called Pease Pottage. The name was weird enough that Kirat remembers it today. And it's the last service station before you get to Brighton. And it's here that Kirat pulled in to catch her breath. But she wasn't alone. Bobby was still calling, calling, calling. Only this time, when she picked up, Kirak kept something back. You didn't tell him where you were?
Kirat
No.
Alexei Mostros
Up until this point, Kira had just been following signs to Brighton. But now she typed into her sat nav the exact address she'd been given by the private investigator. So you were sitting in a parking space, probably not too far away from where we are now. And did you have that moment, that fork in the road moment when you thought, okay, I can either carry on to Brighton or turn around and go back?
Kirat
Actually, when I did, I remembered when I drove out, I did wait at the roundabout. I did hesitate and there was probably sort of 10 seconds where I'd gone. Home, Brighton. Home, Brighton, Brighton. Let's just go.
Alexei Mostros
Big choice.
Kirat
Yeah. But I needed to know. I did need to know.
Alexei Mostros
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Simran Bogle
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Alexei Mostros
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Simran Bogle
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Alexei Mostros
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Simran Bogle
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Alexei Mostros
Turns out you can love a work management platform.
Simran Bogle
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Kirat
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Alexei Mostros
Now in June 2018 and finally, in the space of a few days, this whole edifice of lies, the catfishing deceit, well, it all comes crashing down. And it was all thanks to a split second decision of Kierat's to turn left and not right at the roundabout out of Pease Pottage service station. Not back to London, but to Brighton and towards the truth. You okay? Yeah, yeah, I'm just gonna pull in here. It was like a domino effect. And the first domino falls when Kira pulls up outside Bobby's front door this way.
Kirat
It all came crashing down. I still didn't think he wasn't. I did still do. Didn't ever think at this point that he wasn't him.
Alexei Mostros
Yeah.
Kirat
But it was where everything came crashing down that the relationship ended.
Simran Bogle
Okay, so Saturday evening about 7:00, this.
Alexei Mostros
Is the real Bobby. I'm sitting in his best friend's front room and he's telling me about that day in Brighton. It was a life changing day for both Kierat and Bobby. A day when the Catfishers fantasy collided with reality. And in fact, listening to this podcast will be the first time that Kierat and Bobby have heard each other's version of that day.
Kirat
It took me a while to get out of the car. I remember ringing the doorbell. I think it was the doorbell.
Simran Bogle
Yeah, I'm with my wife, my son, we're upstairs and we're trying to put him to sleep. There's a ring at the doorbell.
Kirat
Nobody answered. I didn't know if anybody was home, but I was beginning to recognize things from photographs that had been sent to me.
Simran Bogle
I go downstairs. Who could that be?
Kirat
So I started walking away. I don't think I gave him enough time to be honest. I was that nervous.
Simran Bogle
Open the door. Nobody there. I look beyond our driveway and a lady's walking away from the house. She turns, we make eye contact and I see rage. I see a lot of aggression. And she turns around and starts walking back towards me and just starts really aggressively saying, how could you? How dare you? How dare You? Eight years. Eight years. And I'm thinking, whoa, lady, who are you? What do you want? I've never seen you in my life, please. And I'm thinking, this lady needs help. Who is she?
Kirat
I was like, it's me. And he's like, I don't understand. You've got me confused for my brother.
Simran Bogle
My brother and I are often confused for the same person. Maybe you think I'm my brother.
Kirat
J. I was just confused. I was like, why are you being like this?
Simran Bogle
She's like, nope, this is who you are. She names our names, she says. And I was like, whoa. Okay. She's definitely got the right people. Really shell shocked now we're getting a little bit frightened.
Kirat
What are you being. What are you being like this for? And then out walked the ex wife. And then I was like, okay, he's pretending like that's why. He's like not anything to me not being, you know, he's. He's warning me off. Like it was for me. It was like he was warning me off, like, go away because she's here. So that's what I thought was happening. He's been living a double life.
Alexei Mostros
From Kierat's perspective, it was horribly clear Bobby had been lying to her about where he was and about who he was with. He clearly got back together with his ex wife, Scott, and was trying to pretend he didn't know who Kirat was. She couldn't have known at this point that Bobby had in fact never left his wife and had been happily married for years.
Simran Bogle
I don't know what's going on at this time. My wife and son come to the doorstep and my wife was like, bobby, who is this lady? And I'm like. I was like, I don't know who this person is. I've never seen her in my life. And thankfully my wife and I have this trusting relationship. She took my word for it and we were like, okay, what is this? What is this? You know?
Alexei Mostros
In the confusion, Kirat gets out her phone to show Bobby that she has him saved.
Simran Bogle
It's got a picture that I look closely. It's me. I'm looking at my own face on her phone. I can't even deny it. I'm like, that's me. But a phone number, that's not mine. And I was like, okay, so that's not my phone number. She's like, you liar.
Kirat
So I gave him my number. So I didn't. Wasn't scared of giving it to him because he had it anyway. As far as I Was concerned.
Alexei Mostros
Yeah.
Kirat
And he rang my phone and it didn't come up. His name didn't come up. And I just said to him, you've had so many numbers you've been lying. How do I know? Like this could be another number.
Alexei Mostros
Yeah.
Simran Bogle
At that point I remember her phone ringing and it was my face that came up on her phone and I looked at her and I looked at her phone. I'm like, I'm not calling you, that's not me. And she seemed very confused. Just she answered the phone, she spoke, I don't know what was said. And at that point she put the phone down. I was like, I'm right here. I hope you now understand that's not me.
Alexei Mostros
What Kirat thought at this point was aha. Bobbie's wife has gone back inside to call Kirat from a different phone. She's in on this whole scam too.
Simran Bogle
And she then gets, she's, then she says, I'm going to call Simran. I'm like the only Simran I knew was somebody that had a relationship with my brother a long time before. So I was like, is that Simran Bogle by any chance? Let me speak to her as well please because I need to figure out what's going on. So she calls, she's like, hi Simran, I'm here. He's, he's denying everything. I, I don't know what to do. I'm not sure what's going on. And I was like, harkit, can I speak to Simran please? She gives me the phone, I'm like, simran, who is this person? What is she doing outside our house? She knows everything about me. Who is she? Simran says something like, she's my cousin. She's a bit confused. Let me figure out what's going on please. Could you hand her the phone back and I'll try and figure it out.
Alexei Mostros
Simran, who has been beside Kirat for so much of this turmoil, a bridge between her life with Bobbie and the real world. Simran gets on the phone and calms Bobbie down and she also manages to placate Kierat.
Kirat
And they were having a conversation like they knew each other, said there wasn't any doubt about that. The fact that they had that conversation and that Simran was then saying to me, don't worry, don't worry, he loves you, don't worry, don't worry. And that it's all his ex wife who he was there with. Well yeah, that, that kind of reinforced the fact that I was right. I'd caught him red handed. Why would he speak to Simran otherwise?
Alexei Mostros
Kira, distraught, upset, sits down on the grass outside Bobbie's house. Bobbie's wife tries to calm her down, but by this point Kierat needs to leave. So she gets back into her car and heads home, almost unable to see because she was crying so much.
Kirat
Driving back, I had someone on the phone. I was just frantic all the way. I was crying, screaming, crying, and she was trying to keep me calm.
Alexei Mostros
What was she saying?
Kirat
She just kept telling me it's not true. Essie's making him do this.
Alexei Mostros
And what were you, what were you thinking in terms of the implications for.
Kirat
Your life at that point? I wasn't thinking the implications of. I wasn't. I couldn't think right. I was just in pain.
Alexei Mostros
It must have felt almost like a death.
Kirat
Yeah. What was the death of a relationship? But it felt worse a couple of days later.
Alexei Mostros
How so?
Kirat
Because none of these people were real.
Alexei Mostros
At this point. Imagine how would you feel if your whole 30s were taken up by a friendship which turned into a relationship. And after years of difficulties, when it all seemed finally to be working out, you catch your partner in a huge lie and an entire decade of your life now seems to have been for nothing.
Simran Bogle
And she walks off. We are like, okay, we shut the door, all the latches back on, we go inside. Straight away, we start to call the police.
Alexei Mostros
And when Kirat was leaving Bobby's, the last thing she heard him say was that he was going to go to the police. So what I actually think now is that was an understandable response. Bobby knew nothing about the deceit. He'd never seen Kirat before. All he and his wife knew was that some strange woman had turned up and shouted at them. A woman who knew all their personal details, their names, their son's name. They didn't know if she was dangerous or not. How could they? And it turns out Kirrat had similar concerns. While Bobbie called up the police in Brighton, Kierrat went to her local station in Hounslow and she took Simran, her cousin, with her. Simran had heard a lot of what unfolded in Brighton on the phone so she could act as a witness. They filed a report and then they went back to Kirat's. Kirat's mum was there. Simran reassured them that Bobby really did love Kirat. She said she thought it must be his wife blackmailing him. But despite this, when Kirat went to bed that night, she knew her world had changed. But there was one more domino yet to fall. And it finally came crashing down a day later on June 11, 2018.
Kirat
Simran was supposed to come and work from here on the Monday morning, but she took ages. So I was, I was a bit frustrated because that wasn't like her. And I was pacing up and down my room just messaging people and the car eventually pulled up. She didn't get out immediately and I could see her and her brother arguing in the car. There were hand gestures going on between them so I wasn't sure what was going on. It didn't feel normal. And I, from here I just. I had my phone in my hand still and I went straight downstairs to open the door. Sorry, this is tough.
Alexei Mostros
Simran had offered to come round and work from home with Kirat to keep her company as she processed the horrendous events of the weekend. So Kirat was expecting her to arrive early with all her work stuff. But when she showed up at around 11, Simran was in tracksuit bottoms and a T shirt.
Kirat
Well, that's not like her. Where's her work bag? And whatever else. That morning before she'd come, she'd been talking to me. I'd felt really sorry for her for how smart she was, for her to have been taken in by all of this as well. And I was like, you know, I'm so sorry that you've been, you've been had as well. And she, she was like, no, I haven't been truthful, honest with you. You know, when I went to see him in New York, I didn't see him. He asked me to say that to you so you wouldn't worry. So obviously I was angry at her. I was like, why did you do that?
Alexei Mostros
The day before at the police station, Simran had told the police that she had seen Bobby in New York. And now that wasn't true. Simran was one of the only people in the real world who had seen Bobby in the flesh. In 2017, she'd gone to New York on a work trip and visited him in hospital. Or at least that's what she had told Kira. If she wasn't telling the truth about that, what did that mean?
Kirat
And she was just stood in the doorway and I said, you're not going to come in. And she said, I don't think I should come in. And she said, I need to tell you something. And I was like, what? You know, I said, I'm just really annoyed about what you told me. Why did you lie to me? And she said, no, I need to tell you something. It was all me. And I didn't understand, absolutely didn't understand what she meant by that so what do you mean it was all me? And she said I was, I was Bobby, Bobby's me. And I still didn't grasp what she was saying. I was like who's telling you to say this? Have they threatened you as well? So why are you saying this to me? And she said no, it was all me. I wasn't quite grasping it and I could see that her brother was still in the car outside and she said I had to tell my mum and dad this morning. They don't know everything but they know and that's why I'm late. And again my head wasn't registering it quite and I. And I was saying to her I was calling out all the different names and I said what about this person? This person and this person and this person? And at that point I think, I think that point I fell back, I kind of collapsed.
Alexei Mostros
I've stood in Kirat's hallway and tried to picture this scene. The initial foreboding that something was wrong. Kira opening the door and seeing Simran and then hearing the words come out of her mouth. It was all me.
Kirat
And all I could do. I was just called my best friend and I was like, just come over now, Nat. I was screaming down the phone to her just like come over, I need you to come over now.
Alexei Mostros
Harvey, Kirat's best friend raced over. They lived just down the street from.
Kirat
Each other and I get there and she was like it's not real. The front door was open so I just ran in and I was just trying to pick her up off the floor but she was inconsolable. There was a girl there, I didn't know who she was and yeah, like a really impassive face if you can picture it.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat was slumped against the wall with Harvey now by her side. Simran was sitting on the stairs facing towards the door and she was just.
Kirat
Saying tell her what you told me. And she just like came to me on the floor and she just put her arms around and I was trying to explain to her that Bobby is Simran. And I couldn't, just couldn't understand it. I just couldn't. And I kept screaming at her like why? Why did you do this? Why? You know, why would you do this? Why? Why would you? 10 years of my life. You've stolen 10 years of my life. Why didn't you stop? You know, how could you be so sick? You had every chance to stop. You had a million and one Chances to stop. I tried to end the relationship so many times. You could have just stopped. I would have never known the better. Any better. You could have stopped but you chose not to. Why? It was just like constantly. Why? What did I ever do to you? What did I do to deserve this? Have I done anything to you? It was just. The brother went back to the car and she came in and sat down on the second step of our staircase she was facing, not the front door, so she'd, you know, she's facing sideways towards me.
Alexei Mostros
In all the chaos of that morning, one of the things that stands out for Harvey, for Kierat and for me is the way Simran seems to have behaved. No sign of empathy or regret according to both Kierat and Harvey. Her delivery just seemed to be flat. A statement of facts with no real explanation. When she confessed, did she apologize at all or was it a statement?
Kirat
It was never a sorry. Sorry didn't move come out of her mouth once.
Alexei Mostros
She never said sorry?
Kirat
No. So it was. It was. That's what's so poignant. There wasn't a sorry. And it was I've ruined my own life.
Alexei Mostros
Simran appeared to be more concerned about what this confession meant for her rather than for Kirat.
Kirat
And then while I was on the. On the floor in the state I was in, I just suddenly had this whole horror moment of who have I been sleeping with on the phone for the last three years? And she said me. And when she said that, that's when I really started vomiting and passed out.
Alexei Mostros
Do you remember like in your mind how. Whether there were stages in your mind's reaction to this information? So was the first stage Simran is telling me that she's Bobby and was there then a gap and then a kind of realization that she's. That means that she must have been all these characters.
Kirat
I don't think it was processing the information at all, to be honest. It was just that she kept saying it was all me and it was understanding what all meant. If you're Bobby, then who was that person and that, you know, if Bobby was you, then those people couldn't be them, but they're real people. It was really difficult to understand knowing I'd met the real Bobby, knowing that I knew his family. How could she be the real Bobby?
Alexei Mostros
On the face of it, Simran's confession is the last domino in this terrible story. The truth was out. The person behind the deceit from that very first message from Bobby was a young woman called Simran Bogle. It was the Last person Kirat would have expected. It was the last person I expected because Simran doesn't fit the profile of a typical catfisher like you might be imagining. She isn't an older man trying to act out a fantasy. She's young, a young woman, a relative. And she was a golden girl, a head girl at her school who now works in the city as a high powered executive. It was a profile that surprised all the experts we spoke to. Still, we do have her identity. And now you do too. And that means you're pretty much in the same place as I was when I finished reading Kirat's witness statement. So in one way, Kirat's story ends here in 2018. Perpetrator unmasked, job done. But actually, I think there's a lot more to do because even though Simran confessed to the catfish, Kiret is still fighting for justice today. The British police have so far refused to investigate. Simran is still in her high powered job and from the outside her life barely seems to have changed. And thanks to her aggressive lawyers. And I'll get into this more later, almost no one in Kirat's community is allowed to know the whole truth. The situation feels unfinished, unsatisfactory. So I'm going to try and do something a bit different. I'm going to shift from telling you a historical story to carrying out a live investigation. An investigation that tries to ask why rather than just who? Why did Simran do what she did? And why has Kirat, along with countless others who feel they've been victims of online harm, struggled so hard to get justice? I don't know what the investigation will throw up or how this story will end. But I think it all starts with getting hold of Simran herself. Okay, there we go. Hey, is that Simran Bogle? Hello? Hi, Simran speaking. Hey, sorry, I think we're getting cut off a bit. Is that, Is that Simran Bogle? It is, yes. Next week on Sweet Bobby, we delve into the mind of the catfisher and we discover that Simran has done this before. While making the series, Simran's lawyers gave us this statement on her behalf. This matter concerns a family dispute over events that began over a decade ago when I was a schoolgirl. As far as I'm concerned, this is a private family matter that has been resolved. And. And I strongly object to the numerous unfounded and seriously defamatory accusations that have been made about me, as well as details of private matters that have been shared with the media.
Simran Bogle
Get ready for your next true crime binge.
Kirat
It's all a blur. My Aunt Ilsa called me and she just said, get to the hospital. The doctor came in and told us that there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye.
Simran Bogle
This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series from the makers of Sword and scale launches March 3. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.
Release Date: September 4, 2023
Host: Alexei Mostros, Tortoise Media
In the third episode of the award-winning investigative series Sweet Bobby, titled "Confession," host Alexei Mostros delves deeper into the harrowing tale of Kirat and her long-term relationship with Bobby—a relationship built on deceit and manipulation orchestrated by an unexpected culprit. This episode marks a pivotal moment in the series, unraveling the truth behind the sophisticated catfishing scheme that has left Kirat devastated and seeking answers.
[02:41] Alexei Mostros:
"Hey, how you doing? Hey dog. Oh my goodness. Pretty much since this podcast started..."
Alexei reflects on his ongoing investigation, highlighting his commitment to uncovering complex deceit. He introduces the central figure of this episode—the real Bobby—whom Kirat believed she was in a relationship with for nearly a decade.
[02:58] Kirat:
"I thought he was a puppy."
The episode recounts the first encounter between Alexei, his producer Amrit, and the real Bobby in Brighton. Kirat had been led to believe she was building a future with Bobby, envisioning marriage and family. However, this meeting leaves Alexei with more questions than answers, as Bobby remains hesitant to divulge information about the deception.
[03:39] Kirat:
"Hi, Alex."
Despite initial insights, Bobby remains elusive, requesting that the meeting be off the record, leaving the investigation at a standstill.
As months pass without clarity, Kirat's frustration mounts. Bobby's continual excuses and unfulfilled promises begin to erode her trust, pushing her to the brink.
[12:13] Kirat:
"I don't care what's going to happen to me today because I don't know how to face my family anymore."
The psychological toll on Kirat becomes evident as she grapples with isolation, gaslighting, and the crumbling facade of her relationship with Bobby. Her attempts to maintain appearances for her family only deepen her internal conflict.
[19:20] Kirat:
"So I just thought I'm gonna go. I'm gonna show him that there's nothing to be scared of."
Driven by a desperate need for truth, Kirat decides to confront Bobby in Brighton. Accompanied by Alexei, who shared the same journey, this trip becomes a turning point in uncovering the layers of deceit.
[21:17] Alexei Mostros:
"It's called Pease Pottage. The name was weird enough that Kirat remembers it today."
Upon arriving, Kirat faces immediate resistance. Bobby's wife confronts her aggressively, revealing cracks in the fabricated relationship that Kirat believed in.
[25:15] Kirat:
"It all came crashing down."
The confrontation exposes the truth: Bobby had been living a double life, never fully committing to Kirat as he had promised.
[31:38] Alexei Mostros:
"Next week on Sweet Bobby, we delve into the mind of the catfisher and we discover that Simran has done this before."
The climax of the episode unveils a stunning twist—Simran Bogle, a young woman with a seemingly impeccable reputation, is the mastermind behind the catfishing scheme. Her manipulation went undetected due to her unassuming profile, challenging preconceived notions about perpetrators of such deceit.
[40:08] Alexei Mostros:
"I've stood in Kirat's hallway and tried to picture this scene."
Kirat confronts Simran, leading to a moment of complete revelation where Simran admits, "I was Bobby, Bobby's me." This confession not only shatters Kirat's reality but also raises questions about Simran's motives and the extent of her deception.
The fallout from the revelation leaves Kirat and her community in disarray. Despite identifying the perpetrator, justice remains elusive as British police have declined to investigate further. Simran continues her life unaffected, bolstered by aggressive legal representation that shields her from repercussions.
[43:36] Kirat:
"It was never a sorry. Sorry didn't move come out of her mouth once."
Kirat's quest for closure is met with frustration and abandonment, highlighting systemic issues in addressing online deceit and providing support for victims.
Alexei Mostros concludes the episode by emphasizing the unresolved nature of Kirat's struggle for justice. He hints at future episodes that will shift focus from recounting past events to conducting a live investigation aimed at understanding the "why" behind Simran's actions and the broader implications for victims of online manipulation.
[48:30] Alexei Mostros:
"I'm going to try and do something a bit different. I'm going to shift from telling you a historical story to carrying out a live investigation."
This transition sets the stage for continued exploration into the psychological and societal factors that enable such sophisticated acts of deceit, promising listeners a deeper dive into the complexities of online relationships and the pursuit of truth.
[12:13] Kirat:
"I don't care what's going to happen to me today because I don't know how to face my family anymore."
[25:15] Kirat:
"It all came crashing down."
[31:38] Alexei Mostros:
"Next week on Sweet Bobby, we delve into the mind of the catfisher and we discover that Simran has done this before."
[40:08] Alexei Mostros:
"I've stood in Kirat's hallway and tried to picture this scene."
[43:36] Kirat:
"It was never a sorry. Sorry didn't move come out of her mouth once."
"Confession | Ep 3" of Sweet Bobby masterfully captures the anguish and complexity of a relationship built on lies. Through meticulous investigation and emotional storytelling, the episode not only unveils the identity of the catfisher but also underscores the enduring pain and quest for justice experienced by victims of online deceit. As the series progresses, listeners are left anticipating deeper insights into the motivations behind such manipulations and the broader societal challenges they present.