
Kirat is a successful marketer and radio presenter. Online, she’s contacted by a man she vaguely knows called Bobby, and they start chatting. Slowly, they become close… and she’s reeled in to a scam of epic proportions.
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Alexei Mostros
Thank you for listening to Sweet Bobby. This podcast has been on an incredible journey since we released it back in 2021, and since then I've gone on to investigate a whole range of other stories. There's hoaxed about one of the most serious conspiracies in the uk and my search for the people behind it who trolled Amber, which digs into the bot campaign against Amber heard during the celebrity trial of the century, which Johnny Depp. And this autumn I released Elon's Spies, all about the private investigators used by one of the most powerful men on the planet, Elon Musk. So if you liked what you heard with Sweet Bobby and you want to try another of my investigative podcasts, just search for Tortoise Investigates. That's Tortoise Investigates. It's the home of all our best investigations all in one place.
Basha
Get ready for your next true crime binge. It's all a blur. My Aunt Ilsa called me and she just said, get to the hospital. The doctor came in and told us that there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye. This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series from the makers of Sword and Scale launches March 3rd. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. We all have that one friend whose opinion we trust on everything. For 63% of podcast listeners, that friend is their favorite podcast host. When Acast's podcasters endorse a brand, their audience listens and takes action. So if you want a recommendation that really sticks, put your brand in their hands. Book a host Red sponsorship today by visiting go.acast.com ads.
Basha
Hello, it's Basha here. Sweet Bobby is the first series in our Tortoise Investigates feed. It was reported by my colleague Alexei Mostros, and it was his first big investigation here at Tortoise, and it shot to number one in the charts both here in the UK and in the us. And there's a reason for that. I worked on this series with Alexei, so I know the story well, but even now I find it truly fascinating and totally compelling. It's a wild journey into one of the most sophisticated catfishing operations that we've ever come across, with a very human story at the heart of it. This statement is as best as I can remember, given that all the communication was constant and bombarding.
Alexei Mostros
This story, the one that you're about to hear, it's a love story.
Basha
I meant it from the bottom of my heart.
Alexei Mostros
It's a Screwed up, crazy kind of love story, filled with death lies and witness protection programs. But still, it's a love story until it isn't.
Basha
This is killing me. When all conversations are aligned by date, you can also see how consuming the bombardment was. Matters were somehow always urgent, sensitive, or too serious. Much ghosting and gaslighting taking place.
Alexei Mostros
This story starts 11 years ago, way back in 2010. But for me, I only got to hear about it recently. I'm an investigative reporter, and this summer I was working on a story about online porn. I'd arranged to meet a source for lunch. We meet at a restaurant just off Oxford Street. He had some files that he wanted to show me. I remember it was early June. London was just coming out of lockdown. There was a buzz in the air. The source and I, we sit down and order tapas. And he shows me the information. And it's good. But it was right at the end, when we were having coffee, that something else happened. The source hands me a document, a witness statement. Nothing to do with porn.
Basha
The events in this account are simply the general gist of events over a period of a decade. But things were happening practically daily.
Alexei Mostros
And as he passes it across the table, he leans in and he says something like, this is the craziest case I've ever seen. And you know what? He was right. In more than 15 years of journalism, covering everything from tax avoidance to terrorism, I've never seen anything like it again.
Basha
The pressure on me was constant. My freedom and independence became less and less, while the power and control over me became increasingly constant and intense.
Alexei Mostros
This is the story of a woman called Kirat and a man called Bobbie. And it's about how Bobbie manipulated Kirat. Over 10 years. He destroyed her career.
Basha
What can I do to help you.
Alexei Mostros
See your heart, her friendships.
Basha
She went from being a vibrant person to being a shadow of herself.
Alexei Mostros
Her chance to have a family.
Basha
Why didn't you stop?
Alexei Mostros
And almost her life.
Basha
You could have stopped, but you chose not to. Why?
Alexei Mostros
This may have started out as a love story, but it ends up as something much darker. I'm Alexi Mostres and from Tortoise Media, you're listening to Sweet Bobby. Episode one, Sliding Doors.
Basha
This is AC Radio on 1602am in satellite channel 0169 is the road show with myself keeping you company. I say all the way till six is not that long to go, Especially when you're having fun.
Alexei Mostros
Kira Assi. She's a presenter on her local community radio station, Desi Radio.
Basha
Hello, Desi Radio.
Alexei Mostros
She's on every Thursday from 2 to 6.
Basha
Oh, it's her dad's birthday. What's his name?
Alexei Mostros
There's a lot going on, but as you can hear, Kirat is a total pro.
Basha
Okay, I'll definitely get one on for him. You might not get two. You might have to wear.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat's full name is Hurkirat Khur Assi, but everyone calls her Kirat.
Basha
You just don't know where the time goes when you're doing it, you're occupied, you can't think about anything else. You're. I don't have time.
Alexei Mostros
And I think radio is an obvious choice for Kira. She's a natural talker. In fact, the first time I met her, our meeting lasted eight hours straight.
Basha
It's just like madness. It's suddenly just done. I was like, earlier.
Alexei Mostros
By 2010, Kira had been on Desi radio for a few years. She was 30 years old and she had a busy life.
Basha
I had so much going on. I'm not saying my life was all fun and games. There were difficult things, as anyone does have in their life, but, yeah, you know, prospects. There were prospects and I was looking forward to it. There was so much to be explored. I could see my roadmap then, which is in stark contrast to now.
Alexei Mostros
Kira and I were basically the same age and I remember being 30, old enough to know what I wanted, but young enough not to care that much. And it was the same with her. She was happy with her job, thinking about starting a family, but having fun too.
Basha
There used to be a regular night called Bombay Bronx. It used to be once a month and all of us would kind of get together. No matter where we were, what we were doing, we'd all end up there, you know, that was a standard. You go there, you chill out, have a laugh, come back four, five o'clock in the morning, still get up in the morning to go to the office at 8:00 in the morning. That was a standard. Lots of nights like that.
Alexei Mostros
That's not to say that life was all plain sailing. It wasn't. Kirat's parents weren't getting along that well. An uncle she had been close to had become ill and Kirat's main job in events, that was quite stressful, but it wasn't anything she couldn't handle. And then in November 2010, she gets a message on Facebook. Hey, Harkerat, Hope you're well. It's JJ's brother. Hope you got the message from Simram regarding a note that he had written.
Basha
He'd always Put in a good word for you, you got his better side, Looked up to you as a big sister, as he told us. Kind regards, Bobby.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat wasn't expecting it, but it wasn't totally random either. Kirat had a second cousin called Simran. She was about 17 at this point, more than a decade younger than Kirat. Simran was, was dating a guy called jj who was the same age in his teens. In college, Simran and JJ broke up and JJ reached out to Kirat for advice on Facebook, kind of treating her like a big sister, asking her how could he win simran back. So JJ, the 17 year old and Kira started messaging each other a few messages a week and then suddenly out of nowhere, in August 2010, JJ dies. He just drops dead one day, apparently from some sort of allergic reaction. Kira didn't know how to react. I mean, it was shocking news, but she barely knew him and it's not like there was much she could do. So she got on with her life. And it was about a month after that that Bobbie, JJ's brother, messages her.
Basha
He'd contacted me to say, you know, thank you for being so kind to my brother and all that kind of thing and gave my condolences, started, you know, ended up speaking to the brother.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat hadn't met Bobbie at this point, but she'd heard his name before. They come from the same community. Kierat and most of the other characters in this story, they're Sikhs. And the Sikh community in the UK is extremely close.
Basha
Everyone knows of each other and news spreads like wildfire.
Alexei Mostros
In our community, there was another important connection between Bobby and Kiret.
Basha
And then we've got the whole Kenya community. Two degrees of separation.
Alexei Mostros
I'm kind of ashamed that I didn't know this before, but in the last 150 years or so, a lot of Indians have migrated to Kenya. And many British Sikhs today still have close links to Kenya and their families still have close links to each other. So when Bobby messaged Kirat on Facebook, Kirat knew of him vaguely through the Sikh community and through friends and family in Kenya. This was just someone she instinctively trusted. Plus she could see from his Facebook page that he'd been to some of the same events she'd been at and that he was already friends with some of her cousins. So far, so very normal. Except it wasn't normal. And now I'm gonna do something you don't really do in a psychological thriller, which if this was a film, it definitely would be. I'm gonna give you a spoiler Trusting Bobby back then was understandable. Normal, unremarkable. He was just a friend of a friend on Facebook. But for Kierat, it turned out to be a life changing mistake. You may have guessed already, but Bobby isn't who he says he is. Bobby was a character, one at the centre of a sophisticated catfishing operation, which means someone was pretending to be Bobby online, stealing his identity and deliberately drawing Kira into a web of lies. And every expert lawyer and criminologist I've shown this case to, well, it's blown their minds. Oh, my God. Where to start? What the hell has been going on? It's, it's truly remarkable. I'm going to tell you the whole story of how and why this happened, but for now you need to know how it all started. All Kirat had in front of her at this moment in 2010 were a few Facebook messages from Bobby. A handsome cardiologist, friends with some of her friends who was a few years younger than she, was talking to her sweetly about his baby brother.
Basha
He was the good big brother who did everything right. It was, you know, like, you know, oh, he's the goody goody. He's married and he can't do anything wrong. You know, he's always doing the right thing by the family.
Alexei Mostros
But over time, the conversation started to change.
Basha
He started talking to me more regularly and things were going wrong in his life. He was confiding in me. Sorry to disturb you, I just needed.
Alexei Mostros
Help and thought of you first. They began messaging more and more. Their friendship became a little closer.
Basha
What can you do? You be kind to somebody, right? He's just lost his brother. I didn't have any reason to question it. You know, we know the family exists. Again, there's mutual people who are on there. Obviously our families are connected. While I didn't know him personally, there were people in between that I knew personally. It was a respectable family, didn't have any reason to doubt it. And again, there was no reason to think that he was hitting on me or anything like that because he's a married man.
Alexei Mostros
And Kierat learned a few more things about Bobby.
Basha
They learned that his wife was expecting a baby. He was super, super happy. He was working in a hospital at the time and down times he messaged me on Facebook. We had conversations about what he wanted to call a baby, if he was a boy or a girl. And I did find it a bit strange that he was talking to me about it because it's something you should be talking to his wife.
Alexei Mostros
How many Times a day. Were you speaking to him at this point or a week?
Basha
I mean, we weren't talking every day. It was just whenever he approached me, so to speak. And the thing is, it wasn't like a Facebook messenger situation necessarily. So there'd be like a long message from him, then there'd be a long response from me. Almost like you were pen pals. Almost. So it's not instant communication like you think of it right now.
Alexei Mostros
I've read and listened to thousands of messages between Kira and Bobbie, literally hours of my I've spent in their world. And something that's interesting to me at this point is that Kirat wasn't being bombarded with messages from Bobby, not at this early stage, at least. Bobby's approach was way more subtle than that.
Basha
Again, you know, I never felt the need to ask for a phone number or anything like that. I didn't know where he lived. I didn't know anything, to be honest. And I wasn't curious either, because I didn't really need to know. You know, I had my own life going on here, so I was just being a shoulder to cry on.
Alexei Mostros
Over the months, Bobby revealed that his happy family life was imploding. He separated from his wife, argued with his family, and it was all taking its toll.
Basha
Everything is just becoming all too much work too.
Alexei Mostros
Just taken time off, made a few decisions.
Basha
But I really wouldn't be where I.
Alexei Mostros
Am taking the path without your wise words of wisdom.
Basha
Drinks are on me when I'm back. Make that two rounds since I missed your birthday too.
Alexei Mostros
As Bobby shared so openly with her, Kirat started to open up about her own life. Intimate stuff about her on off partner and how he was being difficult. Now. Now I've noticed that whenever I tell Kirat's story to anyone, my wife, my friends, there's a divide. Many people over the age of 40 struggle to see how she could become so close to someone she'd never met. But anyone younger, they get it. If you've grown up in an online world, it's obvious that online relationships can be as close as any other. Think about starting a conversation with a stranger. In real life, you're working with really limited data, but if you chat to someone online, you've got a wealth of information at your fingertips. Their politics, their age, how they behave. And you can leverage that to become very close to someone very quickly, which is cool, but it's open to manipulation, too.
Basha
So. I'm Harvey. I met Kirat for the first time when I started school at 7 years old, and I've known her since. So we've known each other for about 35 years now. So I guess you could say she started off as a school friend, then she became a family friend, and now she's more like a sister to me.
Alexei Mostros
Kirat's best friend, Harvey, was there from the beginning. She started hearing about this new friend, Bobby, and was instinctively concerned. Can you remember the first time that she mentioned him?
Basha
Um, yeah. It. It was quite weird because I thought even when he was her friend, that she would talk to. It was a weird relationship.
Alexei Mostros
Bobby had just left his wife. His life was a mess. Was this really what Kirat needed right now? But Harvey also knew something else about her friend. Kirat was the sort of person to go above and beyond to help anyone that asked for it, which made her vulnerable again.
Basha
This is Kira all over. Like, if she feels people need her, she will be there 100%. And that's what it was. It was like she really felt like they needed her. So she was there. She would help anyone in need. So even if she hadn't met these people physically, she felt needed and she did as best as she could.
Alexei Mostros
Harvey was worried about where this was going, and it turns out she was right to be. Why?
Basha
Why do you want to do that to me? Why are you so adamant and hurting me? You help your little brother land a great job abroad, but when he arrives, the job doesn't exist. Instead, he's trapped in a heavily guarded compound, forced to sit at a computer and scam innocent victims while armed guards stand by with shoot to kill orders. Scam Factory, the explosive new true crime podcast from Wondery, exposes a multi billion dollar criminal empire operating in plain sight. Told through one family's harrowing account of sleepless nights, desperate phone calls and dangerous rescue attempts, Scam Factory reveals a brutal truth. The only way out is to scam their way out. Follow Scam Factory on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Scam Factory early and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus. Dear old work platform. It's not you, it's us. Actually, it is you.
Alexei Mostros
Endless onboarding, constant IT bottlenecks.
Basha
We've had enough. We need a platform that just gets us. And to be honest, we've met someone new.
Alexei Mostros
They're called Monday.com and it was love at first.
Basha
Onboarding.
Alexei Mostros
Their beautiful dashboards, their customizable workflows got.
Basha
Us floating on a digital cloud nine so no hard feelings, but we're moving.
Alexei Mostros
On Monday.com, the first work platform you'll love to use.
Basha
Get ready for your next True Crime binge It's all a blur. My Aunt Ilsa called me and she just said get to the hospital. The doctor came in and told us that there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye. This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series from the makers of Sword and Scale launches March 3rd. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. And now a next level moment from.
Basha
AT and T Business.
Alexei Mostros
Say you've sent out a gigantic shipment of pillows and they need to be there in time for International Sleep day. You've got AT and T5G so you're fully confident, but the vendor isn't responding and International Sleep Day is tomorrow.
Basha
Luckily, AT&T5G lets you deal with any issues with ease, so the pillows will.
Alexei Mostros
Get delivered and everyone can sleep soundly, especially you. AT&T5G requires a compatible plan and device coverage not available everywhere. Learn more@att.com 5G Network have you ever wondered what might have been you know the film Sliding Doors? Would things be different if you caught the train? It's a 1990s classic starring Gwyneth Paltrow, and it's a film about a single moment, really what life would have been like if things had gone a little differently.
Basha
I had just caught that train.
Alexei Mostros
I'd been home agelessly. The film opens with Helen, the main character, rushing to catch a train home, but she's a second too late. She misses it. That's version one. And then the film rewinds and this time in version two, Helen does make the train. So she's home just in time to catch her boyfriend cheating on her. The film is about how a split second can change everything. Obviously real life doesn't work like that. Except for Kirat, it sort of did. Her Sliding Doors moment came in the spring of 2011, a moment when she brushed right up against the truth but didn't quite grasp it hard enough. It was about five months after she started talking to Bobby on her best friend Harvey's hen night. We were the light, the shines. They left London and had gone down to the seaside in Brighton for a night on the town.
Basha
So we went out and yeah, it was a really cheesy club called Lola's and I think it was a Hawaiian themed like palm trees, Hawaiian shirt kind of club.
Alexei Mostros
It was a bit of a dive. Sticky floors, low ceilings, lots of noise. Still, the girls didn't care. They were there to have fun.
Basha
I think that was the idea. It was supposed to be a themed night and everyone had a few, had a good laugh, sang along to all the songs. I'm usually the responsible one. So there were a couple of others that didn't drink either. So we were the responsible crew, looking after the very drunk crew.
Alexei Mostros
I can picture them in this club, dancing, drinking tequila shots. But then this typical Brighton hen night takes an unexpected turn, quite a sinister turn given all that we know well into the night.
Basha
I think it's probably about 1130 maybe. I remember speaking to the girls. I was think I think was speaking to Harvey and one of the others and suddenly figure walks past and it's quite unusual. A guy in a turban stands out a mile. That's the whole point of wearing a turban. And it was Bobby. It was really Bobby. And I was like really shocked. I remember turning around to Harvey, who was the hen and probably not in the best state of mind at that time, remember saying, oh my God, Harvey, it's Bobby. I can't believe it. And with him was someone else, his friend. They're walking past and they went to a raised part of the club. And I just went, I'm going to go and say hello. And I followed them. I was like, Bobby. And he answered, he was like, yeah, hi kind of thing. And then he wasn't necessarily friendly, but he wasn't unfriendly. He was just like acknowledged me. And I was talking to him and it was loud, it was club people, a bit happy and leery and it was just noisy. And I was trying to have a conversation with him. I was trying to explain to him it's me and he's just like looking at me like I was. He was like, I don't know, I don't remember. And I didn't want to embarrass him and I thought maybe he's had a few too many to drink because he looked a bit kind of spaced out. He was quite serious, you know, he wasn't like panicked or anything. He was just like, I don't know. And I was like, okay. And because he's always been so respectful, I didn't want to embarrass him. And I went, it's okay, don't worry. And I walked back. But I was just like, wow, what's he doing here? I didn't know he lived in Brighton.
Alexei Mostros
It was a mad coincidence. And it makes me feel a bit sick because I know what's coming and I want to go back in time and shout at her. He isn't who you think he is. Because at this point, Bobby and Kirat were just online friends. They'd only been messaging for a few months. No real damage had been done. And I'm thinking if only the club had been a bit quieter or they'd met a few hours earlier, Kirat could have worked out the truth and maybe she could have saved herself from more than a decade of pain. But that didn't happen. Kirat pushed her way back through the crowd and rejoined her hen party. Bobby was drunk. She was thinking, I'm not going to embarrass him. Still, I find it a bit weird that she didn't press Bobby harder that night. After all, this is a guy that's been messaging you for five months or so and then acts like he doesn't know you. But there was another reason that Kirat was ready to let it slide. Bobby wasn't the only person she was talking to. There were other people who Kierat knew who said they also knew Bobby, who backed up what he was saying. People she had no reason to doubt.
Basha
Thinking back on that night now, I do think that I should question things more. If I just pushed him and said, come on, it's me and made him talk to me, I might not have had to go through the last 10, 13 years that I have. It could have been so different. But what do you do at 1 o'clock in the morning in the middle of a club? Get ready for your next True Crime binge. It's all a blur. My Aunt Ilsa called me and she just said, get to the hospital. The doctor came in and told us that there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye. This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series.
Basha
From the makers of Sword and Scale launches March 3rd.
Alexei Mostros
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Basha
At your local store when you purchase participating products.
Alexei Mostros
Save on household essentials from General Mills, Kellogg's, Philadelphia Quaker and Tide.
Basha
Clip the offer in the app for.
Alexei Mostros
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Basha
Plus you can even have your groceries delivered or use Drive up and go to have your groceries brought to your car at the store.
Alexei Mostros
Restrictions and exclusions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details. That's not quite the end of episode one. There's something else I need to tell you. After Brighton, Bobby distanced himself from Kirat. He moved to Australia and got engaged to a new partner. Kirat was invited to his wedding in Kenya. She couldn't make it, but she saw pictures of the ceremony on Facebook. Meanwhile, she got on with her life. She took a job at St. Mary's University in London, organising events. She helped out on the London Olympics in 2012. And then in November 2013, two years after she met Bobbie in Brighton, she was doing her radio show and something caught her eye.
Basha
Because I used to take messages from callers on Facebook. I used to have all the screens open and in the feed, while I was there, it appeared in the feed that Bobby had been shot in Kenya. There'd been a picture of him in hospital with loads of wires on him sitting. It was like half shot. And one of his friends had posted saying, this has been da, da, da. Happened to my friend, whatever. And obviously he'd been tagged, which is why it appeared in my feed. I remember being in my show and.
Alexei Mostros
Just being like, whoa, Bobby had been shot. Or at least that's what it said on Facebook. Over the next few weeks, she followed posts that said he was in and out of a coma. Kirat felt totally helpless, stuck in another country. But one of Bobby's friends kept her updated. So did Bobby's new wife. So did Kirat's cousin Simran, who happened to be in Kenya at the time. For weeks, Kirat was on tenterhooks waiting for information, waiting to find out if he was okay. And then Bobby woke up. I remember that you used to be my brother's friend. He had told me lots about you.
Basha
Please help where you can. Feels as though I've just lost a great relationship.
Alexei Mostros
That was one of the first messages Bobby sent Kirat after he came out of the coma. He said he'd lost his memory, or at least part of it. But a few weeks after he woke up, Bobby's condition began to deteriorate. I have a massive headache again, just waiting for yet more scan results. Definitely something not right.
Basha
If morphine can't keep the pain away. He'd gone back into a coma, basically after he'd had a headache and they'd taken him back in and I'd been the last person to speak to him, like message him, have communication with him. So we knew that. And then I remember I got sick that day. I think I had food poisoning that day. And my partner had picked me up and taken me to his. I'd been sort of not feeling very well. I think I was asleep. And when we got the message that Bobby had passed away.
Alexei Mostros
For Kira, it was pretty devastating. But for me, I'm thinking, this is really weird. If Bobby is at the centre of a catfishing operation, the character at the heart of it all, why did the person pulling the strings kill him off? Bobby was the main link into Kirat. Without Bobby, how would the catfish work? How did you get the message?
Basha
On Messenger. And it came, I think, in a group as well. And the group had loads of people. There were 39 of us in the group, so I didn't know lots of those people or I knew of them, some of them, the cousins.
Alexei Mostros
So you were added to a Facebook group with 39?
Basha
Yeah, 39 people in that group.
Alexei Mostros
I remember this conversation with Kirat, and not just because I was puzzled about Bobby's death, it was that number at the end. The Facebook group which was set up for Bobby, had 39 people, all of them grieving and posting condolences, all with different accounts. If Bobby didn't exist, were all of these people being scammed too? Why would anyone try and deceive that many people? But then I caught myself. I was being naive. Naive to the complexity of the deception. What if all of those people were fake too?
Basha
It's quite feasible that a single person built this narrative. In the same way that we look at, you know, legitimate fiction, people build wonderful interleaved, you know, wonderful universes.
Alexei Mostros
My name's Dr. Chris Hand.
Basha
I'm a senior lecturer in psychology at the University of Glasgow. I mean, when I first came across this case, it was. It was like an epic, you know, was like something like War and Peace.
Alexei Mostros
With this massive cast of characters.
Basha
And what was compelling to me was how an individual would be able to create this world by drawing on reality.
Alexei Mostros
And I think these cases are so compelling because they often just pull in.
Basha
Enough from what's happening in real world with real people to, again, just give it that flavor of authenticity.
Alexei Mostros
Over the next five episodes, I'm going to tell you the whole story, what I think is likely to be the most sophisticated catfishing scam ever perpetrated. But the story isn't finished. Even today, Kirat has no idea why this happened to her. So I'm going to try and get her some answers. I'm going to hunt for the person who did this to her and finally ask them the questions Kirat has been haunted by. I don't know yet where this will all end up. But it matters. There might be other victims. Next time on Sweet Bobby. The deception becomes more elaborate, more sophisticated. And I try and find out more about Bobby himself. What's real and what's fake. Was he just an innocent player in all this? Oh, and one more thing. Hi. So you spoke to Bobby? Bobby's alive.
Basha
Get ready for your next true crime binge. It's all a blur. My Aunt Elsa called me and she just said, get to the hospital. The doctor came in and told us that there's really not much more that they could do for her and that we need to go say goodbye. This doesn't happen to people like me.
Alexei Mostros
A new True Crime 10 part series from the makers of Sword and Scale launches March 3rd. Subscribe now on Apple podcasts and Spotify.
Sweet Bobby: Episode 1 - Sliding Doors
Released: September 4, 2023 | Host: Tortoise Media
In the gripping first episode of Sweet Bobby, investigative reporter Alexei Mostros delves into what he terms the most sophisticated catfishing operation ever uncovered. This true crime series unravels the intricate web of deception that ensnared Kirat, a vibrant radio presenter from London, transforming her life over a decade-long ordeal filled with manipulation, lies, and profound personal loss.
Kirat Assi, a 30-year-old presenter on Desi Radio, led a fulfilling life in London. She was deeply involved in her community, actively participating in events and even contributing to the London Olympics in 2012. Her personal life appeared stable, with aspirations of starting a family and maintaining strong friendships.
Basha (Kirat): “I could see my roadmap then, which is in stark contrast to now.” [07:16]
Kirat's best friend, Harvey, described her as someone who would go above and beyond to help others, making her inherently trusting and compassionate—traits that would later make her vulnerable to manipulation.
In November 2010, Kirat's life took an unexpected turn when she received a Facebook message from Bobbie, purportedly the brother of her second cousin's ex-boyfriend, JJ. Attracted by his apparent vulnerability and the shared community ties within the Sikh community, Kirat began exchanging messages with Bobby.
Alexei Mostros: “This story, the one that you're about to hear, it's a love story.” [04:42]
Initially, Bobby presented himself as a handsome cardiologist, engaging Kirat with personal stories about his family and expressing gratitude for her support following his brother JJ's untimely death.
Basha: “He was the good big brother who did everything right... always doing the right thing by the family.” [13:28]
Over the following months, Bobby's messages became increasingly personal. He shared details about his deteriorating family life, including a strained marriage and the pressures it placed upon him.
Alexei Mostros: “As Bobby shared so openly with her, Kirat started to open up about her own life.” [16:38]
Kirat felt a deepening connection, exchanging intimate details about her relationships and personal struggles. Despite minor red flags—such as Bobby discussing future plans like naming his baby—Kirat dismissed her concerns, trusting the consistent and heartfelt communication.
Basha: “What can you do? You be kind to somebody, right?” [15:12]
In the spring of 2011, during a hen night in Brighton, Kirat's world seemingly collided with Bobby's. At a themed club, Kirat unexpectedly encountered Bobby in person. The interaction was brief and confusing, with Bobby appearing disoriented and unrecognizing her.
Basha: “He was quite serious, you know, he wasn't like panicked or anything.” [25:20]
This encounter should have been a wake-up call, hinting at inconsistencies in Bobby's persona. However, amidst the chaos of the nightclub and the late hour, Kirat chose not to press further, leaving many questions unanswered.
Two years after their Brighton meeting, in November 2013, Kirat's life took another tragic turn. While managing her radio show, she noticed alarming posts on Facebook indicating that Bobby had been shot in Kenya and was in a coma. As she monitored these updates, Bobby briefly reappeared, claiming memory loss, only to deteriorate once more and ultimately pass away.
Alexei Mostros: “If Bobby is at the centre of a catfishing operation, why did the person pulling the strings kill him off?” [32:33]
This conflicting information deepened the mystery, raising suspicions about Bobby's true identity and the nature of his relationship with Kirat.
Alexei Mostros identifies key elements that point to an elaborate catfishing scheme:
Multiple Fake Accounts: The Facebook group set up for Bobby included 39 members, all posting condolences from different accounts. This suggests a single orchestrator creating a façade of a grieving community.
Manipulation of Trust: Leveraging Kirat's compassionate nature and community ties, the scammer built a believable and emotionally engaging narrative.
Exploitation of Technology: Utilizing the extensive data available online, the perpetrator crafted a detailed and authentic persona, making it difficult for victims to discern reality from deception.
Dr. Chris Hand: “An individual would be able to create this world by drawing on reality.” [34:25]
The prolonged deception had a devastating effect on Kirat's life. Over ten years, Bobby's manipulation eroded her career, strained her personal relationships, and left her grappling with profound emotional trauma.
Basha: “She went from being a vibrant person to being a shadow of herself.” [05:09]
Despite the red flags, Kirat remained ensnared in the web of lies, her trust exploited by a sophisticated and relentless scammer.
Determined to uncover the truth, Alexei Mostros commits to finding the mastermind behind the Sweet Bobby operation. His investigation aims to provide closure for Kirat and reveal the extent of the scam, potentially uncovering other victims.
Alexei Mostros: “I'm going to try and get her some answers. I'm going to hunt for the person who did this to her and finally ask them the questions Kirat has been haunted by.” [35:08]
Episode one sets the stage for a deeply personal and investigative journey into online deception and its far-reaching consequences. As Alexei Mostros pledges to unravel the truth behind Sweet Bobby, listeners are left anticipating the unfolding of a case that blurs the lines between reality and manipulation.
Alexei Mostros: “Over the next five episodes, I'm going to tell you the whole story...” [34:56]
Notable Quotes:
Alexei Mostros: “This may have started out as a love story, but it ends up as something much darker.” [05:22]
Basha (Kirat): “Why didn't you stop?... You could have stopped, but you chose not to. Why?” [05:15]
Dr. Chris Hand: “What was compelling to me was how an individual would be able to create this world by drawing on reality.” [34:39]
Key Takeaways:
For those intrigued by this harrowing tale of trust and betrayal, Sweet Bobby continues to unravel the layers of deceit in subsequent episodes, offering insights into the dark possibilities of online interactions.