Podcast
Talking Phase
Hosted by Pam & Tom · EN
Imagine you wake up one day and you realize that you're in your fifties, you've been divorced a couple of times, and that dating totally sucks. Now imagine you meet someone else just like you and you make a podcast out of it. Well...welcome to The Talking Phase Podcast, where hosts Pam and Tom dive into the complexities of modern relationships, dating, and everything in between. Whether you're navigating the stormy waters of post-divorce life, exploring the dating scene, or simply curious about the human experience, this podcast is your go-to source for insightful, candid, and often hilarious discussions.
Pam and Tom bring a unique blend of experience and chemistry to the table. Tom, the former host of the "My Crazy Divorce" podcast, has a knack for uncovering the most jaw-dropping stories and life lessons from his guests. Pam, a dynamic and engaging co-host, adds her own flair and perspective, making every episode a must-listen. Together, they explore a wide range of topics, from infidelity and breakups to aging and adult children, ensuring there's something for everyone.
The Talking Phase Podcast is more than just a conversation between Pam and Tom. They bring in a diverse array of guests who offer their unique perspectives on relationships, dating, and personal growth. From experts in the field to everyday people with extraordinary stories, these guests add depth, richness, and humor to the discussions. Whether it's guests sharing an update on their life, or a new voice offering fresh insights, the guests on The Talking Phase Podcast are an integral part of what makes the show so compelling. Their experiences, combined with Pam and Tom's engaging hosting style, create a dynamic and multi-faceted exploration of the topics at hand, ensuring that listeners always come away with new knowledge, ideas, and perspectives to consider.
The Talking Phase Podcast isn't just about relationships. It's about the journey of self-discovery and growth that comes with every phase of life. Pam and Tom's conversations are raw, real, and relatable, offering listeners a chance to reflect on their own experiences and learn from others. They don't shy away from the tough questions, and their honest, no-holds-barred approach keeps you coming back for more.
So, if you're ready to laugh, cry, and everything in between, join Pam and Tom - and their guests - on The Talking Phase Podcast. Subscribe now and become part of a community that values open, honest, and thought-provoking conversations. Whether you're a long-time listener or new to the show, there's always something new to discover and enjoy. Don't miss out! Tune in today and start your journey with The Talking Phase!
19episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Episode 40: Do I Want a Partner - or Just Their Netflix Password 👿
Feb 28, 202500:52:07Tap to summarizeAre married people secretly jealous of their single friends, or is it the other way around? In this thought-provoking episode, we dive deep into the eternal debate of grass-is-greener syndrome between married and single life, featuring a candid conversation with a happily married guest who might just challenge everything you think you know about modern relationships.Join hosts Tom and Pam as they explore the complexities of marriage versus single life, featuring refreshingly honest insights about what it really means to come home to someone every day. Through personal stories and real-world experiences, they tackle the age-old question: Is it better to be contentedly single or settling in a relationship that's just "good enough"?The discussion takes an intriguing turn when they examine the difference between loving someone and being "in love." Using their own experiences and professional insights, the hosts break down why the distinction matters and what it means for long-term relationship success.Later in the episode, they address a listener's compelling question about the importance of feeling "sparks" in a relationship, offering practical advice for anyone questioning whether their current partnership is truly "the one" or just comfortable mediocrity.The conversation concludes with a powerful message about finding happiness in whatever relationship status you're in, while still remaining open to the possibility of finding your "unicorn" - that perfect partnership that enhances rather than defines your life.
Transcribe →Episode 39: Let’s Focus on the Future (Because the Past is a Mess)
Feb 21, 202500:46:14Tap to summarizeEver wondered how much of your dating history you should reveal on a first date? What happens when your past feels too heavy to share, but hiding it seems dishonest? This week's episode of The Talking Phase tackles the delicate balance between authenticity and oversharing in modern dating.Join hosts Tom and Pam as they dive deep into two compelling relationship dilemmas. First, they address a listener's struggle with sharing past relationship mistakes without scaring potential partners away. Through real-world examples and practical advice, they explore how to navigate these vulnerable conversations while maintaining healthy boundaries.The conversation then shifts to an age-old dating challenge: catching feelings in a friends-with-benefits situation. When one person starts wanting more after a year of casual dating, should they risk everything by speaking up? Our hosts share their contrasting experiences and offer strategic approaches to having this difficult conversation.Packed with candid stories, including Pam's recent encounter with an oversharing date and Tom's perspective on transitioning from friendship to romance, this episode delivers actionable insights for anyone navigating the complexities of modern relationships. Their practical advice ranges from managing alcohol consumption on dates to techniques for answering difficult questions about your past.Whether you're dealing with dating regrets, considering upgrading a casual relationship, or simply trying to figure out how much to share and when, this episode provides the guidance you need to navigate these common but challenging situations with confidence and authenticity.
Transcribe →Episode 38: Exes and... Oh Nos!
Feb 14, 202500:47:22Tap to summarizeShould you ever rekindle an old flame? What if your high school sweetheart suddenly reappeared in your life - would you give them another chance? In this Valentine's Day special, we dive deep into the complex world of rekindling past relationships and whether opposites truly attract. Join hosts Tom and Pam as they share fascinating real-life stories about second chances in love, including an incredible tale of high school sweethearts who reconnected after five years apart and got married within four months. They explore why some reunions lead to lasting happiness while others end in heartbreak. The hosts tackle the age-old debate of whether couples need shared interests to make a relationship work. Through personal experiences and listener questions, they examine the challenges that arise when extroverts date introverts and how different lifestyle preferences can impact long-term compatibility. This Valentine's Day episode offers valuable insights into the psychology of reconciliation, the role of timing in relationships, and whether fundamental differences between partners can be overcome. Tom and Pam share their contrasting perspectives on getting back together with exes, with Tom taking a firm "never again" stance while Pam opens up about her experiences giving past relationships another chance. Whether you're considering reaching out to an ex or wondering if your current relationship can survive despite different interests, this episode provides thoughtful analysis and practical advice for navigating these complex emotional situations.
Transcribe →Episode 37: The Relationship Waiting Room
Feb 7, 202500:48:45Tap to summarizeAre you terrified of being alone? Does the thought of living by yourself make you want to jump into a relationship - any relationship - just to avoid it? In this raw and revealing episode of The Talking Phase, hosts Tom and Pam dive deep into the psychology of why we fear solitude and how it impacts our dating choices. When Pam's daughter recently moved out, she faced her ultimate fear: living alone for the first time. She candidly shares how this experience forced her to confront her pattern of staying in unfulfilling relationships just to avoid being solo. Meanwhile, Tom brings his perspective on taking time between relationships to truly heal and become whole. The hosts tackle a provocative listener question about finances in dating - when is it appropriate to ask about someone's credit score and savings? This sparks a heated debate about money, privilege, and relationship expectations in your 40s and 50s. Tom shares his experience of rebuilding financially post-divorce while Pam questions whether financial status should be a dating dealbreaker. Between discussing Sebastian Maniscalco's comedy show, National Popcorn Day celebrations, and Pam's hilarious rejection of a Cybertruck-driving date, the episode perfectly balances deep insights with laugh-out-loud moments. The hosts explore how dating apps, fear of loneliness, and financial compatibility all intersect in modern relationships. This episode is perfect for anyone navigating single life, dealing with an empty nest, or wondering how to approach money conversations in dating. Join Tom and Pam as they offer both wisdom and witty banter about finding happiness - whether you're alone or coupled up.
Transcribe →Episode 36: The Chemistry Conundrum
Jan 31, 202500:47:56Tap to summarizeIs the "spark" in dating real, or are we sabotaging potential relationships by expecting instant chemistry? In this explosive episode of The Talking Phase, hosts Tom and Pam go head-to-head on whether that magical connection should make or break a first date. Plus, a riveting discussion about intimacy vs. sex that will change how you view relationships forever! Dive deep into the age-old dating dilemma as our hosts tackle a listener's struggle with finding instant chemistry on first dates. Tom firmly believes if there's no spark, there never will be, while Pam challenges this notion, suggesting that real connections take time to develop. Their heated debate might just change your approach to dating! The episode takes an intimate turn as they address another listener's struggle with finding emotional connection during physical intimacy. From distinguishing between "the act" and true intimacy to navigating vulnerable conversations with partners, Tom and Pam offer raw, honest advice about bridging the intimacy gap in relationships. Get an exclusive peek into Tom's flourishing relationship with Laura, including his kids' heartwarming reaction to meeting her. Plus, Pam shares her authentic journey through January as a proud member of the "single forever club" and her upcoming beach adventure with her daughter for a Valentine's Day partnership. The hosts also dive into a candid review of the steamy film "Anyone But You," exploring its parallels with real-life relationship dynamics and the importance of honest communication about intimacy. Don't miss this episode packed with relationship wisdom, heated debates, and raw authenticity!
Transcribe →Episode 35: When the EX Won't Exit
Jan 24, 202500:45:19Tap to summarizeWhat happens when boundaries cross into control? When does a marriage become just two people sharing a house? In this gripping episode of The Talking Phase, we dive deep into two heart-wrenching stories that challenge our understanding of modern relationships. Can a marriage survive separate bedrooms and dating apps? Should you trust your partner's friendships with their exes? Join hosts Tom and Pam as they tackle a devastating email from a newly married woman whose husband seems completely checked out - sleeping in separate rooms, eating alone, and even suggesting she get on dating apps. The hosts draw from their own experiences with rejection and disconnection to offer candid advice about when it's time to walk away. The conversation takes an intriguing turn as they explore another listener's struggle with setting boundaries around their girlfriend's relationships with ex-partners and former love interests. Through personal stories, including Tom's experience with his sister's engagement and Pam's ongoing friendships with exes, they examine the delicate balance between trust and reasonable boundaries. Between discussions of toxic relationships and healthy boundaries, the hosts share updates about their lives, including Pam's evolving empty nest experience and Tom's introduction of a new partner to his children. They also introduce "NICK" - an acronym for the four relationship killers that signal the end of any marriage. In this raw and honest episode, Tom and Pam demonstrate why The Talking Phase has become a trusted source for relationship advice, offering both tough love and compassionate understanding to listeners facing difficult relationship decisions.
Transcribe →Episode 34: Nice Guys | The REAL Endangered Species
Jan 17, 202500:46:40Tap to summarizeAre men really forced to choose between being "alpha" or "nice"? What if there's a third option that women actually prefer? In this compelling episode of The Talking Phase, hosts Tom and Pam dive deep into the controversial debate about what women truly want in relationships, challenging popular TikTok dating advice and exposing the real truth about the "nice guy" stereotype. Discover why the traditional "alpha male" approach might be doing more harm than good, and learn about the crucial difference between being "nice" and being "kind." Through candid office surveys and real-life experiences, Tom and Pam reveal surprising insights about how age affects dating preferences and why the "chase" might be more toxic than you think. Join us for an eye-opening discussion about modern dating dynamics, featuring personal stories and practical advice about authentic relationship building. Learn why many women are shifting away from wanting the stereotypical "alpha male" and what they're actually looking for instead. Plus, hear a compelling listener story about dealing with emotional walls in relationships. Get ready for an honest conversation about dating psychology, relationship dynamics, and how to navigate the complex world of modern romance. Whether you're struggling with dating apps, trying to understand mixed signals, or wondering why your approach isn't working, this episode offers fresh perspectives and actionable insights. Don't miss our special segment addressing a year-long relationship struggle where actions don't match words, featuring practical advice for anyone dealing with emotional unavailability in their relationship. Plus, learn why the definition of an "alpha male" might not be what you think it is.
Transcribe →Episode 33: Settle Down? I'd Rather Settle UP
Jan 10, 202500:47:04Tap to summarizeAre your dating standards too high, or is the 'single forever' movement onto something? When a friend told Pam she'd end up alone if she didn't lower her standards, it sparked a fascinating debate about modern dating expectations. Should we compromise on our "must-haves" or stay true to our dealbreakers? Join hosts Tom and Pam as they dive deep into the complexities of dating standards in your 40s and 50s. From height requirements to political alignment, they challenge conventional wisdom about what we should and shouldn't compromise on. Plus, they tackle a listener's dilemma about introducing a new partner to their kids after divorce. The episode takes an unexpected turn when Pam reveals how her own dating standards have evolved, questioning whether maintaining rigid expectations is actually self-sabotaging. Meanwhile, Tom shares insights about the difference between genuine standards and unrealistic preferences, offering a fresh perspective on finding love later in life. Things get real when they discuss the growing "single forever" movement and why some people are choosing solitude over settling. The hosts explore whether dating apps are helping or hurting our ability to find meaningful connections, and why so many people are opting out of the dating scene entirely. Don't miss their compelling advice to a single mom struggling with introducing her boyfriend to her kids after six months of dating. Tom and Pam find themselves on opposite sides of this sensitive issue, offering unique perspectives that will make you question your own assumptions about dating as a parent.
Transcribe →Episode 32: Do I Even Have Room for a PLUS ONE?
Jan 3, 202500:49:00Tap to summarizeAre you too independent for love? At what point does being comfortable with your single life actually start sabotaging your chances at finding a meaningful relationship? When you've built a life you absolutely love, is it even worth risking it all for romance? Join hosts Tom and Pam as they dive deep into the complex world of dating after divorce in 2025. They explore the delicate balance between maintaining independence and allowing vulnerability in relationships, sharing their personal experiences with everything from secret morning workout routines to nighttime skincare rituals that they're hesitant to share with potential partners. The episode tackles the challenging reality of modern relationships: how do you merge two completely independent lives without losing yourself in the process? Tom opens up about his new relationship and the internal struggle of potentially disrupting his peaceful single life, while Pam shares insights about her journey of self-discovery and what she's learned about maintaining boundaries. They also address a listener's dilemma about a boyfriend requesting appearance changes, sparking an honest discussion about double standards in relationships and when it's appropriate to ask your partner to change. The hosts explore the fine line between helpful suggestions and controlling behavior. This thought-provoking episode wraps up with practical advice about finding the balance between independence and interdependence, offering valuable insights for anyone navigating the modern dating landscape while trying to maintain their sense of self.
Transcribe →Episode 31: Who Has it WORSE: Men, Women, or EVERYONE?
Dec 27, 202400:47:58Tap to summarizeIs modern dating truly harder for men or women? While men struggle to get matches and responses, women face an overwhelming flood of inappropriate messages and time-wasters. This heated debate explores the raw reality of dating apps, ghosting culture, and why finding love seems harder than ever before in 2024. Join hosts Tom and Pam as they dive deep into the controversial world of dating apps, sharing personal experiences and shocking statistics. From Tom's revealing dating calculator that shows it takes 60-70 hours just to secure a second date, to Pam's insights about managing hundreds of incoming messages, this episode exposes the stark differences between male and female dating experiences. The hosts tackle the age-old question of whether men and women can truly be "just friends," sparked by a listener's email about his girlfriend's close male friend. Can you trust platonic friendships when there's a romantic history? Should you ever ask someone to end a friendship for a relationship? Featuring exciting updates about upcoming concerts (including Gracie Abrams and Pearl Jam), holiday celebrations, and the podcast's growing success as a top 25 video podcast. Plus, don't miss Tom's expert advice on handling jealousy and Pam's powerful stance on maintaining friendships while dating. This must-watch episode concludes with practical advice for anyone navigating the modern dating landscape, whether you're swiping right or trying to maintain boundaries in your current relationship. Plus, find out how you can participate in Tom's dating calculator study!
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