Podcast Summary: "What's Normal Anyway? Understanding Developmental Milestones" (Ep 103)
Talking Toddlers with Erin Hyer
Release Date: April 9, 2025
Introduction to Developmental Milestones
In Episode 103 of Talking Toddlers, host Erin Hyer dives deep into the realm of developmental milestones, aiming to demystify what is considered "normal" in a child's growth trajectory. She emphasizes the importance of understanding these milestones not as rigid deadlines but as flexible guides to support a child's development.
Erin Hyer [00:00]: "I want you to think of milestones as a guide, not a deadline. And I think that's important. They're markers that help guide us through one developmental phase to another."
Common Parental Concerns and Questions
Erin acknowledges the plethora of questions that keep parents awake at night, such as:
- "When should my baby be talking?"
- "Is it normal that she's not crawling sideways or is crawling backwards?"
- "Should he be walking now, and what if he's not interested?"
She reinforces that these concerns are common and legitimizes parental anxiety by stating that every parent grapples with these questions at some point.
Erin Hyer [00:45]: "You're not alone. Every single parent has asked these questions one time or another."
Milestones as Guides, Not Deadlines
Erin reiterates the foundational concept that developmental milestones should serve as reference points rather than strict checklists. She compares them to growth charts, where the focus is on overall trends rather than specific measurements.
Erin Hyer [05:00]: "Milestones work the same way. It's not about hitting a skill right on the dot, but it's about making steady progress toward this marker."
Understanding Developmental Domains
Delving into the multifaceted nature of child development, Erin breaks down the key domains:
- Motor Skills: Gross and fine motor abilities.
- Communication Skills: Both verbal and nonverbal interactions.
- Social-Emotional Development: Engaging with others and adapting to different social contexts.
- Cognition: Higher-order thinking and understanding relationships.
She highlights that progress in these areas is often non-linear, with some domains advancing faster than others.
Erin Hyer [15:30]: "There are multiple domains that we look at… they all work together. And that's why you see progress moving forward."
Plateaus and Signs to Look Out For
Erin discusses the concept of "plateauing," where a child may temporarily stop progressing or even lose certain skills. She stresses that occasional slowdowns are normal, but persistent stagnation warrants deeper investigation.
Erin Hyer [20:45]: "If something has stalled in growth and progress, then he's telling you, he's giving you a message that things are wiring up."
Impact of Daily Routine and Environment
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to how daily habits and environmental factors influence a child's development. Erin touches on:
- Screen Time: The historical context and its impact on fostering boredom and daydreaming.
- Routine Changes: How shifts in the household, such as a parent’s new job or a move, can affect a child's behavior.
- Outdoor Activities: The importance of fresh air and natural light.
- Quiet Play: Encouraging children to engage in activities without constant stimulation.
Erin Hyer [28:15]: "Screen time… hasn't been around that long that we could see the difference… our kids started the beginnings of getting addicted to screen time."
Proactive Parenting: The Three P’s
Erin introduces her "Three P’s" framework for proactive parenting:
- Present: Being fully engaged with your child by minimizing distractions.
- Purposeful: Intentional interactions that foster learning.
- Playful: Incorporating play into everyday activities to stimulate growth.
She draws a parallel between maintaining daily healthy habits and fostering consistent developmental progress in children.
Erin Hyer [35:50]: "My three P's are to be present, purposeful, and playful. If you can ask yourself at the end of each day, did I tap into those, not 24/7, but did I give enough room…"
Using Everyday Moments as Learning Opportunities
Erin provides practical examples of transforming ordinary moments into developmental milestones. For instance, interacting with a baby during playtime by responding to their actions fosters social and linguistic skills.
Erin Hyer [45:30]: "If she keeps dropping it, then you could look at her because that's a social game in the making. That's brain building. That's progress."
Trusting Your Gut and Seeking Guidance
Erin encourages parents to trust their instincts when something feels off. She outlines a simple framework: Observe, Support, and Ask. This approach helps parents become proactive in addressing potential developmental concerns without succumbing to panic.
Erin Hyer [55:10]: "Trust your gut. You know your child better than anyone… show up and learn how they tick."
Conclusion and Empowerment
Wrapping up the episode, Erin empowers parents by reiterating that they are the most crucial factor in their child's development. She emphasizes continuous learning, seeking guidance when necessary, and celebrating the progress made each day.
Erin Hyer [60:00]: "You're already on the right track just by listening to me today… You don't have to know everything. Just be present, be purposeful, and be playful."
Key Takeaways:
- Developmental milestones are guidelines, not strict deadlines.
- Regular progress across multiple domains is more important than meeting specific dates.
- Daily interactions and routines significantly influence a child's growth.
- Proactive parenting through presence, purpose, and play fosters a supportive learning environment.
- Trust parental intuition and seek professional guidance when necessary.
Notable Quotes:
- [00:00]: "I want you to think of milestones as a guide, not a deadline."
- [15:30]: "There are multiple domains that we look at… they all work together."
- [35:50]: "My three P's are to be present, purposeful, and playful."
- [55:10]: "Trust your gut. You know your child better than anyone."
- [60:00]: "You're already on the right track just by listening to me today."
Erin Hyer's insightful discussion in this episode provides a balanced perspective on child development, alleviating parental anxieties by framing milestones as supportive tools. Her emphasis on daily, intentional interactions empowers parents to actively participate in their child's growth, ensuring that toddlers not only meet developmental expectations but thrive emotionally and cognitively.
