#4737 Steal Wheels

Summary

TBTL #4737: "Steal Wheels"

Date: May 28, 2026
Hosts: Luke Burbank & Andrew Walsh

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Episode Overview

In this lively Thursday edition of TBTL, Luke and Andrew lean into their love of the little things that make life fun: a deep dive into the mysterious world of sports sound drops, a nail-biting Little League recap featuring the TBTL Junior Sluggers ("the Jalapeños"), and a spirited debate over fairness in youth baseball. Along the way, they dish out memorable quotes, share thoughts on community, and contemplate the fate of minor league baseball bat dogs. The tone is classic TBTL—funny, meandering, affectionate, and self-deprecating.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The "This Whole Conversation Bothers Me" Origin Mystery

[01:33–16:31]

• Topic: Andrew and Luke try to identify the source of a familiar TBTL sound drop: "This whole conversation bothers me."
• The Guessing Game:
  • Andrew is convinced it's Woody Harrelson:
    “This whole conversation bothers me, and I know that voice . . . Is that Woody Harrelson?” [03:36]
  • Luke always thought it was sports pundit Stephen A. Smith.
  • After playing several drops and hearing both Stephen A. Smith and the mysterious voice, the two begin to doubt.
  • Luke: “I still think it's Stephen A. Smith. I just think he’s not yelling into the microphone . . .” [07:47]
• The Reveal:
  • Luke finally tracks it down: it’s actually Herm Edwards, former NFL coach, not Woody Harrelson or Stephen A. Smith.
  • Herm’s original context: a press conference with the NY Jets.
  • Notable Hermisms: “You play to win the game!” [11:44]
  • Luke: “For years, I’ve been thinking that it’s Stephen A. Smith, and it is, in fact, Herm Edwards.” [10:37]

2. Little League Showdown: The Jalapeños vs. Super Chill Ice Cream

[16:56–51:30]

• The Setting:
  • Luke attended play-offs for the TBTL Junior Sluggers (a.k.a. The Jalapeños) in Portland against the formidable Super Chill Ice Cream Team (13 wins/1 loss).
• Game Dynamics:
  • Luke explains how, at this level, just a few elite players can dominate.
  • Super Chill starts strong, running up 4 runs in the first inning by aggressively “chaos ball” stealing bases.
  • Luke’s reflection: “It felt to me like the coaches of the other team . . . creating chaos ball. And at this level there’s enough chaos priced in.” [21:37]
• Comeback Story:
  • The Jalapeños struggle but stay resilient. Key pitcher Crosby delivers an immaculate inning (“He absolutely shut down the other team…”) [23:01]
  • Final inning: Jalapeños trail 0–4, but stage an extraordinary comeback—stringing together walks, steals, and hits to tie the game 4–4 with heroic base-running (multiple players steal home).
  • Luke on the emotional climax:
    “They locked in in the top of the sixth inning . . . the pure tenacity, the heart, the grit . . . just decided to absolutely access somewhere in their core being.” [35:30]
• Coaching & Sportsmanship:
  • Discuss the ethics of Super Chill’s catcher swap for control—a move both found “iffy.”
  • Both appreciate the Sluggers’ coaches’ positive, supportive approach, as opposed to old-school, “probation” coaches from their youth.
• Postgame Celebration:
  • Luke records Coach Ben’s speech:
    “You kept battling. You didn’t give up. We were down to two outs . . . and we put together the hits that we needed and the walks that we needed and the amazing base running Atlas.” [39:40]
  • The kids chant for TBTL (“Are you TBTL?!” / “Nobody’s been that excited about TBTL in the history of the show.” [43:01])
• End of Season & Reflections:
  • Despite the tie, Sluggers eliminated on the “runs allowed” tiebreaker; reflect on competitiveness and community:
    • “Being there was . . . one of the highlights of my spring.” [51:30]

3. Dazzling Donors and Listener Community

[52:08–66:24]

• Donor Spotlights:
  • Heartfelt appreciation for donors like Rebecca Butler (Philadelphia), Kenneth Nay (Ypsilanti, MI), Denny (Golden Blursday at 76), and more.
  • Highlights on listener projects (e.g., the In Kind Baking Project)—spreading kindness through baked goods:
    “Baking for someone else is a small act of resistance. It interrupts isolation and it turns frustration into joy.” [59:06]
• Listener Interactions:
  • Blursday shout-outs celebrate the power of the TBTL community, from cherished friendships to self-blursed birthdays for longtime listeners (“I’ve never been blursed before, so it seems like the only way I’ll get blursed is if I blurse myself. So happy 36th Blursday today.” – Jacob, [93:36])

4. Sports Talk: The Bat Dog Injury Scandal

[68:22–81:28]

• The Story:
  • Dodgers prospect Kendall George injures his patellar tendon avoiding the Tulsa Drillers’ bat dog (“old knee buster”—a joke).
• Whose Fault?
  • Luke: fiercely Team Dog, insists the dog is blameless:
    • “If anybody says anything mean to that perfect angel of a dog . . . I immediately became team dog and wished nothing but bad upon Kendall George.” [71:10]
  • Andrew: “The dog did not do anything that made him . . . have to do something so physically unusual that he should have hurt himself."
• Aftermath:
  • Tulsa suspends their bat dog program. Both hosts (and most listeners) are dismayed at this “criminal” outcome.

5. Other Memorable Moments

• Running Gags:
  • Andrew’s theories on Twisted Tea and WikiFeet/WikiQuote crossover (“Quotes about feet”).
  • Luke fist-bumping cooler robots on LA’s Sunset Blvd.
• Buffet Nostalgia:
  • Reminiscing about the King's Table and Royal Fork buffets, complete with era-correct horror movie associations.

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Notable Quotes & Moments With Timestamps

• “This whole conversation bothers me.”
  — Herm Edwards, multiple instances [00:33–16:31, 22:56, 30:21, 51:59]

• “He absolutely shut down the other team, which was amazing. Now here’s the thing. You only get six innings . . .”
  — Luke, on Crosby’s pitching, [23:01]

• “Let’s not get this thing twisted . . . we didn’t get lucky. We won.”
  — Luke, quoting Herm Edwards, [15:48]

• “You kept battling. You didn’t give up. We were down to two outs . . . and we put together the hits that we needed.”
  — Coach Ben, postgame pep talk, [39:40]

• “Nobody’s been that excited about TBTL in the history of the show.”
  — Andrew, reacting to the kids’ cheer, [43:05]

• "Baking for someone else is a small act of resistance. It interrupts isolation and it turns frustration into joy."
  — Listener Rebecca Butler, [59:06]

• “I immediately became team dog and wished nothing but bad upon Kendall George. And that’s not the right response, but that’s . . . my gut.”
  — Luke, on the bat dog incident, [71:10]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Drop Mystery — Herm Edwards or Stephen A. Smith? [01:33–16:31]
• Little League Epic: Jalapeños vs. Super Chill [16:56–51:30]
  • Play-by-play of the comeback [35:30–38:40]
  • Coach Ben’s speech [39:40–41:16]
• Listener Donor Spotlights & Community [52:08–66:24]
• Bat Dog Incident [68:22–81:28]
• Buffet & Seattle Nostalgia [83:00–88:00]
• Blursdays [78:40–94:00]

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Conclusion & Takeaways

• Theme: The joy (and heartbreak) of community—whether it's a Little League team rallying against the odds, listeners supporting each other and the show, or the steadfast defense of unsung heroes like bat dogs.
• Memorable Tone: Playfully competitive (especially about Little League), deeply affectionate for their community, always self-aware of their own obsessions.
• Must-Listen Segments:
  • The unraveling of the “conversation bothers me” drop mystery.
  • The suspenseful Little League recap and Coach Ben’s postgame speech.
  • Luke’s comically passionate defense of minor league bat dogs and dismay at their (temporary) cancellation.

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If you missed this TBTL episode, you missed:

• Satisfying closure on a long-running inside joke,
• A bottom-of-the-6th rally for the ages,
• Some of the most delightful, silly sports banter this side of the Columbia.

No mountain too tall, and good luck to all!

Transcript

[Dr. Gail Timlin]

My name is Dr. Gail Timlin, President of Diet Supplement Industries, Incorporated. And people say to me all the time, but, Gail, you're not a real doctor. And I say to them, oh, yeah? Well, I graduated with a PhD in religious studies at Kent State University. Is that real enough for you? No. Well, how's this for real? I lost hundreds of pounds by taking the best dietary product on the market, Dietoloxepam. But can something so good be legally, you ask? Hey, you ask a lot of questions. Of course it's legal. And I should know. I'm not only a doctor and president of Diet Supplemental Industries, Incorporated, I'm also the junior state representative of Rhode island.

[Andrew]

Tbtm. That's it. The radio. I'll go on the most popular program of the day.

[Luke Burbank]

I assume that's still Don McNeil and his breakfast Club. Like I ask people, what's in your muffin? Huh? How about me?

[Coach Ben]

Why don't you ask me? Anybody? Anybody Ask me what's in my muffin?

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know what's in my muffin.

[Andrew]

If you two dirtbags ever mess with me again, I'll take this to the next level. You don't do 22 episodes of celebrity

[Luke Burbank]

Outhouse with Lorena Bobbitt without learning a few things.

[Andrew]

Dude, you are the best. You're awesome. Dude, you are God's gift to the airwaves.

[Luke Burbank]

What have you got to say for yourselves? It's Hammer time. Let the freak out begin. All right. Hello, good. Good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Thursday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

My name's Luke Burbank. I'm your host. Are you sure? That's what they said on Ass Jeeves RIP Coming to you from the Madrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia, where we're looking at a gorgeous Thursday. Oh, Ma Pa. It's just beautiful. The lawn is freshly shorn. We don't really use the term shorn for describing what's happened to Elan. And maybe it's better that way. All right, I'm gonna get it together, folks. And really, that was my last mistake of the program. It's gonna be smooth sailing from here as we've made it to episode 4737 in a collector series. Let the fun begin. I spent an absolutely perfect evening in Portland, Oregon, yesterday watching the TBTL Junior Sluggers, AKA the Jalapenos, play baseball at a high, high level, taking on the Super Chill Ice Cream Team, a team that was 13 wins and one loss coming into this playoff showdown. And I'll give you a full report on how that game went. Also, speaking of baseball, there's a baseball dog that's in trouble.

[Herm Edwards]

He was a little dog named Snuggles.

[Luke Burbank]

And if you've listened to the show for any length of time, you know that I'm siding with the dog. Probably in this case, it's a Thursday, AKA a blursday. So it's my birthday. Today we'll celebrate the birthdays of some of the listeners and we'll say hello to this guy. Longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. He had a little trouble this morning before the program.

[Dr. Gail Timlin]

I'm afraid I just blew myself.

[Luke Burbank]

But he's got every. He's Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

[Andrew]

Good morning, Luke. Can we play a little bit of a guess that voice, but it's me guessing the voice that you just played. You played a drop at the beginning of the show. I think it was your very first drop that I've heard a million times.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Andrew]

This whole conversation bothers me, and I know that voice. And I don't know that I've ever stopped to think what that is. Is that Woody Harrelson? Is it not Woody Harrelson? The fact that you're laughing at me makes me think it's not Woody Harrelson.

[Luke Burbank]

It's definitely not.

[Andrew]

Whole conversation bothers me.

[Herm Edwards]

I know conversation bothers me.

[Andrew]

Do I know who it is, or is this something?

[Luke Burbank]

When I say the name, you'll know the person. I don't think you're a regular consumer of their content.

[Andrew]

Yeah, there's this, I guess, but I

[Luke Burbank]

would say you're not in the right racial category even.

[Andrew]

Oh, play it again now. Play it again.

[Herm Edwards]

Conversation bothers me.

[Andrew]

Play it again so I can picture race.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, that's where I was hoping. You take this.

[Andrew]

No, just play it again. Play again.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Andrew]

I am so proud of my ability to identify voices. Even if I struggle with the person's name, I can usually sort of say, oh, it's the guy from that thing, or whatever. But I don't. I think I've always thought that's Woody Harrelson.

[Luke Burbank]

Who is it, Andrew? Now you've got me. Why did you do this? Now you've got me in my own head of who I've been thinking it is. It's not Woody Harrelson. I know that much, but I Have always. For the last however many years, when I play this drop, I've pictured the person who I thought I grabbed this audio from back in the day, but now, you know, my memory is just so shot. Let's see. So I'm playing one more time.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Andrew]

It's such a familiar voice. And what's driving me a little bit bonkers here is whether or not I'm even thinking Woody Harrelson. I can see him saying that because he does sometimes he has a little. I'm hearing a southernish accent in there, right? Where is Woody Harrelson from?

[Luke Burbank]

I think Woody Harrelson's from Indy. Is he from Indiana, or was that just his character Crunch? He's got that braids.

[Andrew]

When I say he has a southern accent, I meant a southern Indiana accent.

[Luke Burbank]

Hey, actually, Andrew, real story, dude. Southern Indiana is. It's pretty southern down there. Like, I got a friend, Billy Joel Huels, who plays in the dusty 45s in Seattle, and he grew up in southern Indiana, and I've been down there occasionally. Southern Indiana has got definitely a southern feel to it. So that's not as crazy as you might think.

[Andrew]

Okay. He was born in Midland, Texas, and it does sort of sound like. But it says he was raised primarily in Lebanon, Ohio, which, I don't know. It sort of sounds a bit like his voice. Sometimes I do feel like I can hear kind of what? A Texas accent.

[Luke Burbank]

Listen, I don't think you're. I don't think you're crazy. I'm gonna tell you that every time I've played this drop, I have pictured in my mind the person who I believe said this, and I snagged the audio because I thought it would be funny for tbtl. Is Stephen A. Smith that you think

[Andrew]

that's Stephen A. Smith?

[Luke Burbank]

I have always thought this was Stephen A. Smith.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

I still think it's Stephen A. Smith.

[Andrew]

I am struggling so much now. Don't be wrong. I want to be very clear about this. I am not saying you're wrong. I'm saying my mind is blown because I play Stephen A. Smith. I know that voice. I've heard that voice so many times. You know, I listen to a lot of straight.

[Luke Burbank]

Either Stephen A. Smith has become more of a caricature of Stephen A. Smith, or that's not Stephen A. Smith. That could be early. You know how when you play, like, early Burbank, when you play me from early days of tbt, and I'm kind of like this, and I'm. I'm being like this, and I'm wondering if there hasn't been for Stephen A. Smith up time where he talked. I'm just going to say more normally like this.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

And that he. Now he's become so much more over the top with his delivery because. Yeah, you do. We play a lot of Stephen A. Smith. You have Stephen A. Smith woven into some of the intro packages.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Like this. And this is not recent. This is a drop that I pulled when I was doing the old Cairo radio show with Nick Jar. And so this is from, like, more than 10 years ago.

[Luke Burbank]

You should be banned from basketball now.

[Andrew]

That's a very different delivery.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

I still think it's Stephen A. Smith. I just think he's not yelling into the microphone on television the way he can. You play one more Stephen A. Smith, and then I'm gonna play this.

[Andrew]

I'm looking at. Do I not. I swore I. Oh, here. Oh, okay. Well, see, and I'm wondering, do you

[Luke Burbank]

have Stephen A. Smith saying this whole conversation?

[Andrew]

Well, we do have one. And I'm wondering, Luke, is there any chance.

[Luke Burbank]

Let's find out.

[Andrew]

That wires got crossed in your brain because the other big Stephen A. Smith dropped that I played all the time on the radio and brought over to the show was him saying it bothers me. And then to come out here with

[Herm Edwards]

the SM smile on your face like that.

[Andrew]

The world is just beautiful.

[Herm Edwards]

I don't understand it.

[Luke Burbank]

It bothers me enough. You got to get it done, period.

[Andrew]

God, I feel like I'm in. I feel like I'm in the Cairo

[Luke Burbank]

studio right now with Nick, how subtle the delivery is. You know what? It's highly possible that because of that Stephen A. Smith drop, which you played a ton over.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I used to play a shortened version of it.

[Luke Burbank]

It bothers me that I took bother and I overlaid it onto this drop to Stephen A. Smith.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

And this whole time I've been picturing the wrong person. That's very possible. In fact, that might be Woody Harrelson. I don't know. Yeah, I don't think it's Woody Harrelson. Here's the thing.

[Andrew]

It does sound like a text Harrelson.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't see Woody Harrelson being bothered by any conversation.

[Andrew]

That's a good point. That's a really good point. Unless he's acting there. But it doesn't sound like he's miked like he's acting. And then you Come out here with

[Herm Edwards]

the smile on your face like that.

[Andrew]

The world is just beautiful.

[Herm Edwards]

I don't understand it.

[Luke Burbank]

It bothers me.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

The more I'm playing it, the more I'm thinking it's not Stephen A. Smith.

[Andrew]

I don't think it is. I don't think it is, but I don't want to. I don't want to, like, tell you you're wrong. It's your tape, you know.

[Luke Burbank]

No, but I, you know, I can't remember. I can't remember, you know, anything ever. I'm what I slugged. Well, we know it wasn't from you because it's just slugged. This whole conversation bothers me, but not with your. Careful. Yeah, with all your stuff. So we know I put it in. I entered. Oh, wow.

[Andrew]

Did you, did you solve it? This would help me so much.

[Luke Burbank]

I did solve it. And Andrew, I'm going to tell you something.

[Andrew]

I'm wrong.

[Luke Burbank]

We thought you were racist when you were trying to listen for what a quote unquote black person sounded like. I'm.

[Andrew]

I never said black. I said I'm listening for race, I believe.

[Luke Burbank]

But we all knew you were thinking black.

[Andrew]

I honestly didn't know what you were going for.

[Luke Burbank]

No, it is a different black man associated with sports drops. It's Herm Edwards.

[Herm Edwards]

This whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

He was a coach of the Jets. He was a coach of the Arizona Cardinals, and he was annoyed in a post game press conference.

[Andrew]

Okay, yes.

[Herm Edwards]

And yes, whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

And what happened in my mind was because there was so much play of Stephen A. Smith and both are in the world of sports. And you're right, he doesn't. They do not sound super similar. But I, I overlaid the whole thing and I, the whole time, for years have been thinking that it's Stephen A. Smith and it is, in fact Herm Edwards.

[Andrew]

I just want to hear Herm Edwards talking about something else here. Here. This is, I think, a tape of him. This is something said Herm Edwards on his viral sports rant. Do you think that the viral sports rant is what I just.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I don't.

[Andrew]

I think that's like a rant.

[Luke Burbank]

He had a different rant that he also got kind of, you know, viral here.

[Andrew]

Can we listen to the rant? Although the rant is going to be the wrong. I feel like it's going to be kind of the wrong tone. But let's take a listen to this.

[Herm Edwards]

To win the game. You don't play to just play It.

[Luke Burbank]

You play to win the game.

[Herm Edwards]

That's a great thing about sport.

[Luke Burbank]

That's him.

[Andrew]

Yeah. You play to win the game is also him.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Oh, and this is it. From this. That's. So this is.

[Herm Edwards]

What about sports?

[Luke Burbank]

This.

[Herm Edwards]

You play to win the game.

[Andrew]

Oh my gosh. It's all coming together.

[Herm Edwards]

Hello. You play to win the game. You don't play to just play it. That's the great thing about sports. You play to win. And I don't care if you don't have any wins. You go play to win. When you start telling me it doesn't matter, then retire.

[Andrew]

I can hear him saying, this whole conversation bothers me.

[Luke Burbank]

We're two and five.

[Andrew]

That was. Now this is him more modern day.

[Luke Burbank]

I think this was. I think he was jets head coach.

[Andrew]

Yeah. He's in front of a Jet when he was banner there.

[Luke Burbank]

And little has changed in Jets. I know.

[Andrew]

I feel, I feel for him. Do. I mean, I don't know much about Herm Edwards. I see his face, you know, on various NFL related programming a lot, I feel like. But I know very little about him. I would not have known that he was the jets head coach before you telling me this. We like him, right? Tell me that we like him. He's not.

[Luke Burbank]

I would tell you that I don't have any strong opinion one way or the other on Herm Edwards. On. On Herman Montmartre Edwards, as Wikipedia explains. That's a hell of a middle name. He. I believe he was a. He played for the Eagles, the Jets and the Kansas City Chiefs. Actually, it's funny. He was born in Monmouth, New Jersey. Fort Monmouth, New Jersey. And then his middle name is Mon Motra. They really were leaning into that.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Then he went to high school in Monterey, California. What is with him and things that start with M O n T?

[Andrew]

He's obsessed. Why is nobody reporting on him?

[Luke Burbank]

This whole conversation bothers me. I don't have like. I find I'm. I think that Herm Edwards is. Is just fine. I do like that he did that rant. I thought that was funny. Yeah. I don't. I don't know much about him. I don't have strong feelings.

[Andrew]

Oh my gosh. I found. I haven't found the audio of your thing, but I found a write up that includes the quote, the very thing that started this very interesting conversation for you, me and the listeners. This was in the New York Post, your newspaper of record, Luke, I believe.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew]

As you know, the headline from October 31, 2002 is Herm Colon we won't quit. And let's see, their lead here says. With their record a disappointing 2 and 5 as they prepare for Sunday's game against the 6 and 1 Chargers in San Diego, the Jets chances for making the playoffs are as sure as the slipshod footing on the Giant Stadium playing field. And then at the very, very end of this article, it says, added Edwards, this whole conversation bothers me big time. It really does.

[Luke Burbank]

You know? How about there, Andrew?

[Andrew]

What?

[Luke Burbank]

That's great. I love that we got to the we can actually cite the exact moment, but you're doing a hermism right there. Hermisms are a real thing. Andrew Edwards is known for his motivational speeches and sound bites given at press conferences, such as A goal without a plan is a wish. The popularity of Edwards motivational speaking has even led to the publication of his own book of quotes. And then they've got some of his quotes. There's Wiki Quote has a separate page for Herm Edwards quotes with New York. He said, this is what's great about sports. This is the greatest thing about sports, is you play to win the game. Hello, you play to win the game with Kansas City. He said, I did a lot of preaching this week. I had my sermons ready. The good part is the congregation was listening. I wish I had passed the collection plate. I would have made a lot of money. But I did it for free. I was following a win against the Chargers in 2006. He also said, let's not get this thing twisted and think we backed into this deal. We didn't lose. We won every team that played this weekend at home and had an opportunity to get into the playoffs just like us. We didn't just happen to win. What's wrong with that? So let's not get it twisted and say, well, they're lucky. We didn't get lucky. We won. Digging pretty deep for a hermism there. That just sounds like a normal thing

[Andrew]

a coach would say. Yogi Berra yeah, that's not exactly punchy. Also, I just had an idea. You know, we've been talking a lot about Twisted Tea on the show lately because you're obsessed with it for some reason. That should be there. You know, people say, don't get it twisted. Twisted Tea should reclaim that. It should be get it twisted. Right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that's a freebie for the bad wizards over there at the Twisted Tea.

[Andrew]

I have another marketing idea you mentioned Wiki Quote. I think that wiki quote and WikiFeet should merge. I think you should be able to Go to one place to see people's best quality quotes. Toes.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, no, best quotes about feet.

[Andrew]

Oh, like, ooh, look at that foot. That's the best quote.

[Luke Burbank]

That's. That's what a lot of that, that's what wiki feet quotes is. That's what it is. It's like that one time someone said, oh boy, that's a nice foot.

[Andrew]

Oh, that's a. Oh, look at that.

[Luke Burbank]

Take a look at that foot. I'd pay money to see that foot. And other such foot related quotes can be found.

[Andrew]

Jay says it's a freaking foot. Anyway, I have totally gotten you off track. You had a hell of a day yesterday.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I've got a big sports update in the world of. I went down to Portland yesterday afternoon. Becca and I got to watch. For the first time all season, the tbtl, the Jalapenos of the Parkside Little League, AKA the TBTL Sluggers, play a playoff game against their league cross league rivals, the Super Chill Ice Cream Team. And I, I should have known because when Becca got there, she just mentioned to me casually, ben, Coach Ben actually works with Becca, is Becca's supervisor technically. Although now that we sponsor the Little league team, I feel like we are his boss.

[Andrew]

The dynamics get interesting.

[Luke Burbank]

The power has shifted. I think we all sense it. And Becca said, yeah, Ben said, this other team is really good. And I was like, oh, no. And what I sort of know instinctively from playing Little League but was reminded of last night is that at this level, at the level that our sluggers play at, if you have like four elite players on your team, if you have even three elite players on your team, you can really run the table. And if you've got four elite players, you've got the other team in a real. You've got them in a real jackpot. Because what you need is a kid who can pitch, a kid who can catch, and then a kid who can probably play shortstop. And then you've sort of got. And then you can rotate them around and you can really be putting up a pretty, a pretty stiff competition. And that was sort of what we were up against with this other team. The first pitcher, they ran out there, kid was dealing, man, he was like, I wouldn't want to stand in against this kid. Then you also add in the fact that the kids at this age, a few of them can throw really fast, but their control is sometimes spotty.

[Andrew]

Oh, so I was comfortable up there, huh?

[Luke Burbank]

I was so impressed and proud of the sluggers hitters who none of them seemed particularly Afraid of the ball, afraid to stand in the batter's box. Like, I mean, again, this kid was whipping the ball in. We had a, we had a kid. I think I'm, you know, I'm doing this from memory, but we had a kid who took it off, took a pitch off the hand. We had another kid who took a pitch that bounced in and hit him on the, kind of in the shins. And so but everybody was, everybody was in there. Everybody was taking good cuts, doing their best. We were having trouble scoring runs for the first. Well, Andrew, five innings and these games go six. So just to give you a preview, they had us locked down defensively. And the problem with that was that in the first inning, the super chill ice cream kids were, in my opinion, anything but.

[Andrew]

Uh huh.

[Luke Burbank]

They were getting on base and then they were stealing every single pitch. Because the rule at this, at this age that I learned is that basically, yes, once the pitcher throws the ball, you can start running and the chances of any battery, if you will, any pitcher, catcher combo at this level, just like regularly throwing the ball to second where the second baseman or shortstop is in position and then, you know, drops the tag down. It's an unlikely kind of situation.

[Andrew]

Right. Don't even risk it. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Right. Now there is this rule where once the pitcher has the ball in their mid, you can't be running. So the game actually becomes for the catcher to fire the ball back to the pitcher immediately get it to the. Because once it gets there, it's like neutralized the run threat.

[Andrew]

Interesting.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay, so that, so anyway, what the, what the less than, less super chill than I would have liked ice cream team was doing was they were getting on base and then they were just like stealing and kind of, you know, just they loaded the bases and then everybody scored. And I want to say a significant number of those runs were scored due to, you know, wild pitching or pass balls or they didn't really, they didn't really like, hit. I think it was. Zaya was our, was our starting pitcher. They didn't really hit Zaya that hard. They just were, they were using, you know, the, the rules of the game. It, it felt to me like a little less than fun. Like, it felt to me like the coaches of the other team. Again, when you get, I was about

[Andrew]

to say if this feels like coaching, you know, this is a coach's decision to have a team kind of all cranked up to do this, right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. And like, yes, it is legal, but it's also kind of like, yeah, it just feels like you're creating chaos ball. And at this level there's enough chaos priced in to the ball, even if you're not stealing every single pitch. And it was, you know, going against our team, so I was feeling a little, a little frustrated, a little resentful, but, you know, it was fair. It's within the rules. And so they just, yeah, they racked up four runs in the first inning, but then Zaya really locked them down in the second inning. They got no runs in the second inning. And then Andrew, Coach, Coach Ben brought in the secret weapon, which is our guy, Crosby. Crosby looks like a kid. You know, he looks like, he looks like a younger version of the long haired kid in Dazed and Confused.

[Andrew]

Oh, okay.

[Luke Burbank]

The kid play baseball too? Doesn't he play baseball in that movie? I feel like.

[Andrew]

Well, a lot of people play football in that movie. I think he's new to the football team.

[Luke Burbank]

Is he in something else? What's the movie? I'm thinking of where there's a kid who's a rangy pitcher with longish hair.

[Andrew]

Boy, now that you're saying that you're like implanting that in my brain. I can picture him being a pitcher. There was any. You know what? Can I be honest with you? This whole conversation bothers me. It's funny you should say that.

[Luke Burbank]

Pod to win the game, you play

[Andrew]

to win the pod. I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know if he, Crosby, came in and just absolutely shut down the super chill ice cream team. I'm talking like he, he, I, he. There may have been one inning where he had an immaculate inning. Is the immaculate inning when it's nine pitches all for strikes?

[Andrew]

That, that is right, yes.

[Luke Burbank]

An immaculate inning is nine pitches all for strikes. Right. That's what they're talking about.

[Andrew]

Including, you know, like fouls that are counted as strikes.

[Luke Burbank]

Sure, but nine pitches total. Yeah, Crosby was dealing. He absolutely shut down the other team, which was amazing. Now here's the thing. You only get six innings in this particular style of play. And so we went into the, we were the visiting team. We went in the top of the sixth inning, Andrew down 4 0. We were losing by four runs going into the top of the sixth. And we, I think, had one hit for the game. Armani had legged out an infield hit at some point and then gotten stranded. So we had no runs and one hit and they had put in. So their first pitcher was really, really tough. And then their second pitcher was still pretty good, but was a little more wild. And then they put in Their third pitcher who was really tough. So you can't have the same, same kid pitch the whole game. There is a pitch count, the most pitches a kid can throw, 75 pitches. I learned all this yesterday. And so, so they put in their third pitcher of the game, who was also a really, really good pitcher. He could throw the ball fast and he was throwing it over the plate. And if you can do that at this level, it's going to be tough. And so, I mean, he had completely shut us down in the fifth inning. There was not any particular reason to expect a different outcome in the top of the sixth other than the pure tenacity, the heart, the grit, the refusing to losing that your TBTL junior sluggers just decided to absolutely access somewhere in their core being. They locked in in the top of the sixth inning and they started working the count. I think it was when I yelled, we need some traffic here, that they really got the message that we needed some traffic. So we had a couple of walks. We had stolen bases aplenty. Now this is when I started to really enjoy the idea of stolen bases, Andrew, was when, when the sluggers were on the base path and doing exactly the same thing to the other team that they had done to us. Literally the same game plan. It would be getting a walk, getting maybe a single, getting on base, and then just stealing that, stealing those bases. Stupid to the point where. And this was another move that felt not super chill to me, Andrew. The super chill ice cream coaches came in and replaced their catcher mid inning because the catcher who they had was having a little bit of trouble basically stopping the pitches as they came in. And so basically they had, they had, they had four really elite players. One of them was the starting pitcher. This was their, maybe their most elite player. So that kid pitched until I think maybe he wasn't allowed to pitch anymore. Then they put him at catcher and then he was catching. And then with a 4 nothing lead going into the final inning, I think their coaches sort of like just thought, yeah, well, we'll, you know, we'll keep rotating because this is of course Little league baseball where everybody's supposed to get to play and experience it and have fun. That's really the goal out here, right? And by the way, full marks to the Jalapenos coaching staff. They were just great, like so good at keeping the kids, you know, sort of pumped up and just being like teaching baseball and reminding the kids what they need to do, but not ever doing it in that kind of yelly, stressful coach way that I grew up with. The problem was most of my coaches. Not most, but at least some of them were on probation and they were coaching Little League because it satisfied their community service requirements. That happened to me in two sports. Andrew. In baseball, we had these rocker dudes who wore leather jackets. It looked like the Ramones. They had never seen a baseball or a baseball bat. That was my Little League coaches one year. And then when I played basketball.

[Andrew]

Do we know what they were in for?

[Luke Burbank]

I think it was vandalism. I think it was some kind of, like, prank gone wrong where they did some kind of. I don't think it. I don't think it was a violent crime. I don't think they'd be allowed to coach kids. But like. And then in basketball, we had an assistant coach on my JV team who it turned out was. Later we found it was some sort of. It was also community service. Anyway, the. The Jalapenos mounted this furious comeback where we managed to get. Pick up a run here, a run there. Now it's four to two. And now the super chill ice cream coaches pull their catcher and who's, you know, again, this is. This is for these kids. Like, it's. It really is the, The. The. The sort of triumph of victory and the agony of defeat. You know, it's like. It's tough when you strike out. A lot of kids kind of walk back to the dugout. You can see they're emotionally pretty affected by it. Again, it was the Jalapenos coaches were like. Are just so great at like, just, you know, gassing the kids up and. And really, you know, just keeping it positive. But you could just tell to me that this catcher on the other team was doing their best and a couple balls got by them and we stole home on that. That's how we got our two runs. So then they pull the catcher and they put their superstar pitcher kid back in at catcher to try to lock it down for the rest of the inning.

[Andrew]

Can I. Can I pause to. Yes, you can kind of examine this for a second, because keep in mind, I wasn't there and I don't have a kind of a sense of, like, where these players are in their age and development as well as you do and coach Ben does. But I can really see this many of them drove to the field 17. I can see it two different ways, and it really has to do with the rest of the vibe of the game itself. This is the only way I would maybe get kind of a little shirty feeling about this, because if this other team is playing a very aggressive brand of baseball that is a sort of take no prisoners. We're going to force a sloppy, chaotic game, force the opponents, in this case the junior sluggers, who can do no wrong, in my opinion. Yes, we're going to force them to make errors because we know that at this level, like, if we get them to throw to second, it'll go on the. You know what I mean? If they're sort of like playing that brand of baseball. And then I do understand and tone goes into this a lot as well. Like, are the kids just kind of out there having fun or are they getting a little bit intense and competitive? And if that's the case, removing a catcher because just a couple of balls went by him or whatever, and he's not as, you know, maybe as sharp as you'd want him to be in that. In that moment. That feels a little iffy to me. Having said that, I can also felt iffy to me. And I can see it in another way, though. It's like, this is Little League. We were teaching kids about a lot of stuff, sportsmanship, and also just like the, you know, the base can be

[Luke Burbank]

replaced and that you can be replaced in that early. Let me. To prepare them for AI.

[Andrew]

Let me put it this way. Like, if this was a game at a level that I would have played at and I was, you know, as you would know or guess, like, zero aptitude for this at all. And I'm out there and I'm a catcher and might. I'm getting upset. I'm getting, like, emotional, or you can even just tell from my body language that, like, I'm letting my team down. I just kind of want to cry or something like that. Get that kid out of there. I don't think.

[Luke Burbank]

I do not think that should be

[Andrew]

making kids wear it. You know what I mean? That's what I mean. Like, I don't think we should make a kid wear it out there. But of course, kid is kind of like, competitive and just kind of makes a couple of mistakes. But it's like, all within the spirit of the game. And also, this is on a team that is really kind of hoping to play that chaos ball, as you put it. Like, then I do have an issue with it.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, it is, I guess, theoretically possible that this kid called his own number, as it were, but I don't think that's what happened. And when I say he was frustrated, you know, it wasn't like this. The catcher that got replaced wasn't that I could Tell having an overly emotional moment to where they didn't want to do it. I think this was the so called super chill coaches wanting to win the game and noticing that the way we were scoring our runs were primarily through stealing home after a pass ball. And so they sent their secret weapon back into who had already been playing catcher to be catcher again.

[Andrew]

And to me, oh, you know, I'm, you know, sorry, I think you might have misspoke before you said that they put their former pitcher in.

[Luke Burbank]

He was the pitcher at the beginning catcher, but he wasn't the catcher. And now he's being the catcher again.

[Andrew]

So he was both. You didn't misspeak. Oh my God.

[Luke Burbank]

It was both.

[Andrew]

Wait, in baseball rules, even if that you're allowed, you don't have to follow the whole. Like once we. Apparently not the game.

[Luke Burbank]

No, apparently not. And that's what I'm saying. Like it felt very strategic to me in a way that was like, it felt a little more. It'd be like having somebody on your team who's coming up in a critical situation and you know that maybe they're not quite as strong at the plate and you like pinch hit somehow sort of somebody who's better for them because you think that will improve your chances of winning. But it's kind of taking the fun out of it for that first kid. And to me, the spirit of Little League is to, you know, be competitive and to do your best. But ultimately this is about kids having fun. Now I want to say everybody at this game, including the fans of the other team, including other coaches, everybody was actually very nice and encouraging. There was no, you know, bad energy coming from anywhere in particular.

[Andrew]

That's big for this story. I think it's good to know, in

[Luke Burbank]

fact, if there was any bad energy was from me. I was having to. First of all, I was getting very into the game.

[Andrew]

I was.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh God, I was feeling very competitive. Oh no, I was. I. I was able to hold back from overtly criticizing the umpire who by the way, was a 15 year old kid.

[Andrew]

Shades of Linda Cardf. Yeah. Oh, which by the way, did you happen to see also? The shoot. I think I sent it to you. I don't want to get us off track. I actually maybe want to talk about this tomorrow. That high school referee or umpire who had to.

[Luke Burbank]

Actually I was referencing that kid yesterday at the game. I was telling about him.

[Andrew]

He was like a 16 year old role model to me. The way he handled a very tense situation with an adult and had to eventually eject the adult out of the game, but did so by maintaining his calm. An amazing story with video to go along with it.

[Luke Burbank]

Super. This kid was about the age of that kid, this, this ump. And he did a just fine job.

[Andrew]

He really did.

[Luke Burbank]

But it's really one of those things where at this age level, and this is the right thing by the way, the umpires have a very, very, very expansive strike zone. You know what I mean? If it's over the, if it's, if it's near the plate, we're calling it a strike because if we didn't, we would be here for a long, long time. So every once in a while, like when you know, a slugger was up and there would be a strike, that was called third strike. That was like kind of seemed to me out of the zone. Just like my baseball watching muscles are so kind of like, you know, it's so reflexive for me to want to be like blue, come on. But then I was like, I didn't do that. But I was thinking it a couple of times and then I was thinking I'm not going to be the guy giving this 14 year old kid a hard time who's doing their best and did, I thought, a very good job. All that is to say why do

[Andrew]

we call them blue when they wear black?

[Luke Burbank]

Did they used to wear blue? I don't know. It's always been blue. Yeah, I mean that's what I've always known it to be called. I wonder if the, if black is a, in the last 20 or 30 years development. So anyway, it is now, you know, still the sixth inning and, but, but again they've got a good pitcher up there and this picture is, is, you know, still getting some outs and Armani comes up to hit and I think it's, and I might be wrong on this is where coach Ben keeps better notes than I do. I'm thinking it might have been our guy, Ollie. Might have been Ollie or maybe Fox. Somebody was on second base. It's two outs though, Andrew. And this. And we're down, we're down. We are down 4 to 2. 4 to 2 with 2 outs and Armani is up and, and our guy steals third again. I'm a big fan of stealing at this point. I think it's chaos. Ball all the way. It's the only way to do it. It's the only thing that makes sense. Steal on every pitch. We're just absolutely doing what they did in the first inning and Armani manages to hit, hit a single to the Right side of the infield and just, like, legs it out an infield single as. As our guy on third comes home. Now it's four to three, top of the sixth inning. This is our last at bat, and I was like, we're tying this game, aren't we? Armani Steel second, steals third. And then even though they've put in arguably their best player at catcher to try to stop this entire scenario, there is a pitch. I think it's high. Maybe there's a pitch that gets away from the catcher. And Armani does not even hesitate. He just bombs it for home, gets home, scores easily. 4 Four sluggers have tied it. They came back and scored four runs in the final frame to tie the game. But the game's not over. Andrew.

[Andrew]

Yeah. How many outs are left now after this stolen run?

[Luke Burbank]

Base. Don't say valor.

[Andrew]

I just say run. Run, stolen.

[Luke Burbank]

They. It's four four with two outs, four fourth.

[Andrew]

And wow. This is. This is like the natural right here. This is.

[Luke Burbank]

They were able to eventually retire us. So we. It's tied 4, 4 at the end of our side of the sixth inning. And by the way, there's no extra innings in Little League. It's just a tie, even in the playoffs. Because this is. I don't want to get too complicated with the pool play, but essentially, let's be honest, everyone has. Everyone has places to be. If we. If we did extra innings in these games, it would be, you know, the games would be very, very long.

[Andrew]

But the ice cream. The ice cream. Kids bat last.

[Luke Burbank]

It's like ice cream. I used to have a bumper sticker that said that.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes, State super chill ice cream is the home team. They get the bat in the bottom of the six, so we've tied it. But now we've got to get them out in the bottom of the sixth. And this is where, you know, Crosby is still pitching, but he's on a pitch count. The pitch count is 75 pitches. At this age, I don't know how many pitches Crosby has, but what I know is with Crosby pitching, we are probably going to get them out without any runs scoring. If he's not pitching, then it becomes a little bit more of an open question. And all I can imagine warming up

[Andrew]

in the bullpen now, Luke

[Luke Burbank]

Munoz.

[Andrew]

Okay, we.

[Luke Burbank]

Nobody was warming up in the bullpen. I was like, oh, my God. I was like, coach. I was like, coach Ben. I was like, it's Tom Wilhelmson. I was like, coach. Coach Ben. Is someone keeping track? Because I knew the other team would Be keeping track because Crosby was unhittable. I was like, if they.

[Andrew]

So you have access to the coach during the game?

[Luke Burbank]

No, I'm saying this.

[Andrew]

Oh, you're saying this silently. Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm saying this in my own mind. Coach Ben, are you someone keeping track of the pitches? Because I could just see a world where we get the first person out, we get the second person out, and then the stage hill ice cream coach is like, hold on, hold on, hold on.

[Andrew]

75.

[Luke Burbank]

That was his 75th pitch. That did not happen good. Amazingly, there were. Crosby still had enough pitches to throw that he was able to. He didn't strike out the side. I think actually they got a base runner, so I think it might have been. I think that person might have even stole second. But he managed to strike out three batters, gave up no runs in the bottom of the sixth. Tie game. Four, four. The sluggers. We did not win, but we also did not lose.

[Andrew]

Yeah, this is a hell.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, it was incredible. The tenacity, the determination. Everybody just stepping up and just doing what they needed to do in various ways. I mean, it was such truly a team effort. And the coaches too, like, it was incredible. I. I went over near Coach Ben's little kind of post game, you know, victory speech, and I just kind of like threw my iPhone over the fence and tried to record it. The audio is not great, but take a listen to. This is coach Ben hyping up the jalapenos.

[Coach Ben]

Fine. So. But listen, guys, you know, I stayed in there. You kept battling. So proud of you. You kept battling. You didn't give up. We were down to two outs. Thank you, Coach John.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, thank you.

[Coach Ben]

You were down to two outs, and we put together the hits that we needed and the walks that we needed and the amazing base running Atlas.

[Luke Burbank]

So Zaya, Atlas and Armani all stole home in the final frame.

[Andrew]

Wow.

[Luke Burbank]

I believe. Let's see. Oh, no. Did I start the file over See here? Nope.

[Coach Ben]

Guys, listen.

[Luke Burbank]

By the way, coaching little leaguers is. Even when you're trying to tell them how good they did, some people are not paying attention.

[Andrew]

No, I'm just picturing we still have

[Luke Burbank]

to get a guy's listen. Yeah, we've still got a guy's listen that we need to deploy. Even in the. Even the. Maybe the most triumphant moment of the sluggers season and maybe history.

[Coach Ben]

Okay, guys, listen. This team was 13 and 1 this year. They lost one game.

[Luke Burbank]

I love the other coach going, now they're 13, 1 and 1. That's nice. Hey, guys, are you proud to get a jalapeno?

[Coach Ben]

Yes. Hey, guys, I'm. I am so proud of you. That was just. That was amazing. Coach Chris, you got anything?

[Luke Burbank]

One of the cool. One of the.

[Coach Ben]

Hey, listen.

[Luke Burbank]

One of the coolest baseball games I've ever been a part of. You guys, I'm so proud of you for fighting back.

[Coach Ben]

You're never out of it. You're never out of it.

[Luke Burbank]

Yep. And now they're. And guess What? Now they're 13.

[Andrew]

One and one. That's right.

[Coach Ben]

Coach Jamie, you got anything you want to say?

[Andrew]

No.

[Luke Burbank]

That was Coach Jamie. She was gobsmacked.

[Andrew]

Love that.

[Luke Burbank]

Gobsmacked. By the way, I just want to say the. Not only the coaches of this team are awesome, but the parents. Becca and I were texting about this today, like. Cause we got to, you know, chat with a bunch of the parents of the kids, and even Coach Ben's parents were there, and what a cool group of people. Just, like. Just, like, super nice. Again, have the exact right attitude about the games. Like, they want the kids to win, but they're not overbearing. But they're also, like, not interested in the baseball game. You know what I mean? Me and some of the other parents are going back and forth about how we thought that the replacing the catcher thing was a little declasse. Like, it's just, like, a really good group of people that I'm, like, so excited that we can even be tangentially kind of connected to, you know, as the sponsors of the team. Speaking of which, after Coach Ben asked all the other coaches on the team how they felt about it, he just noticed that I was leaning over the fence with my. With my cell phone trying to record it. So he asked me my thoughts. I froze a little bit. But, you know,

[Coach Ben]

sponsor Luke, you got anything you want to say?

[Luke Burbank]

Go help. This is the most pressure I've ever felt in the public speech.

[Andrew]

Baba buoy.

[Luke Burbank]

Baba buoy. Baba booey. Baba buoy. Go, Jalapenos. You guys are incredible. Nice job. See, Andrew, that really, though, was the critical part of the whole tape. Did you hear one of the jalapenos go? Are you tbtl?

[Andrew]

I heard something that did a cheer. Yeah, they did a cheer. Listen, this again.

[Luke Burbank]

This was my favorite part of the entire. You guys are incredible.

[Andrew]

Nice job.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Nobody's been that excited about TBTL in the history of the show.

[Luke Burbank]

Will they ever be again? Now, here's the thing. Because of the vagaries of the pool, playoff, etcetera, Even though we. We ended up Tied with the State Chill Ice Cream team or Super Chill Ice Cream Team because of some run differential. Tiebreaker. Whatever. This does bring to a close. The TBTL Junior Slugger season. They.

[Andrew]

Even though we weren't we racking up a bunch of runs in a recent game, and you said, actually there's not a mercy rule in this particular case because the. The point differential does matter in a tiebreaker situation. Yet we didn't rack up enough. We weren't. Here's what enough.

[Luke Burbank]

Apparently the Jalapenos and the Super Chill both ended pool play with a record of 10 and 1. Ben says, I thought the tiebreaker was one run differential, but it's actually runs allowed. So by this standard, we lose out to Super Chill by one. Oh, now seven runs over the tournament and they'd given up six. Does the catcher swap make more sense to you now? Oh, boy. Listeners, I wish you could see Andrew's face because maybe you'd know what the hell's going on, because I don't.

[Andrew]

I'm a little. I am. That news hurts a little bit, to be honest with you. Like, we were on the Super Chill website the other day and we realized that it's not only a baseball team, but a team that is named after a company, and the company is literally run by children. And according to their website, you know, started by children, founded by children. It couldn't. It couldn't be a more wholesome, inspiring story.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Yet what I'm doing in my mind right now is thinking if we can, like, double our investment in the Junior Sluggers next year and just absolutely destroy. Can we send. What is that. What is that place? I think it's in Oregon that, like, pitchers, like MLB pitchers go to and they like.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, there's one in actually.

[Andrew]

Is it Washington?

[Luke Burbank]

One south of Seattle?

[Andrew]

Yes, in Washington.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay. Yeah. It's where, like, Tim Lincecum would go.

[Andrew]

Exactly. Speaking of. By the way, speaking of Tim Lincecum, that's sort of. Not to change the subject too much here, but I wanted to bring up Tim Lincecum because speaking of wins, I'm going to play a little tape for you here. I'll let you figure out what it is. But we are celebrating more than one win today. Although I guess that was kind of a tie yesterday.

[Luke Burbank]

That was a win in my book.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

We were down 40 in the final win.

[Coach Ben]

Hey.

[Andrew]

Okay, the catcher's coming out to the mouth. You'll know what this is in a second.

[Luke Burbank]

What is going on? Forget about those guys. Let's just get this last guy out, okay? Easy for your ass to say.

[Andrew]

Do you know who that is?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, it's a long haired kid in Days of Views in Daisy. Confused. You're absolutely right.

[Andrew]

I completely forgot about this scene. The win that I'm talking about is the win for one Lucas Christian Burbank that. I used to watch this movie like daily in high school and I'd forgotten that the whole thing is. It's like the last day of school or school is wrapped up and all of the freshmen, I think are supposed to get. I don't know if it's the incoming freshman or the outgoing freshmen are supposed to get paddled by the seniors. And so the seniors are sort of stalking this kid who somehow evaded them throughout the day, but now he's pitching his baseball game at night exactly as you're picturing him with the long hair down to his shoulders and nervously sort of like hooking his hair behind his ear. And as you were telling your story about yesterday, I was looking this up and I was also realizing. Oh, also every time Tim Lincecum came up on the mound, I would think of this kid. Yeah, they had kind of similar hair and stu. Sort of like build and stuff. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

That was pretty much what Crosby looked like out there, by the way. Driveline baseball.

[Andrew]

Driveline, right.

[Luke Burbank]

That place where they go and everyone works on their spin rate, et cetera. So, yeah, what you're saying is we need to basically invest whatever we have to as a podcast into the team so that next year when we come back, we can take down the behemoth that is super chill ice cream. But I just gotta tell you, Andrew, being there, like watching, you know, just watching how these kids were with. With each other and with the coaches and again the families and everything, and it was just like a beautiful Wednesday evening in Portland, Oregon, and we, we mounted a heroic four run comeback in the final inning. It just was. It was great. I was so excited. I don't think he'd be embarrassed if I mentioned this, but at one point before I was actually recording the post game speech, I am pretty sure coach Ben got choked up. And I thought that was really, really sweet because, you know, these, these adults put a lot of time into this too. The, you know, and so anyway, it was just.

[Andrew]

I, I am.

[Luke Burbank]

To me, it felt like a w.

[Andrew]

I did want to say that talking about the other team in the. In how I mentioned it sort of seems like it's from the. The coaches down that you sort of inspire this sort of, sort of. I Would say aggressive approach to base running and everything.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, and to be fair, we did

[Andrew]

the exact same thing late later. But I team learned it from the other coaches. I was going to ask you if we. How we feel about our coaching situation as we wrap up the season and if we're, you know, what we're looking at for next year and you know, if we do need to just kind of explore options because it does sound like coach Ben might be a little soft.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, he did go out to the mound twice in the same inning, and then they couldn't switch pitchers. Oh, I'm sorry. That was Dan Wilson. I'm sorry. That was a major league manager who cost us a game. I thought coach Ben handled this perfectly, actually. He was. He worked with. He worked with everything he had. He got the most out of the players and everybody had a really fun time. And man, like, those jalapenos were so hyped after that game. It was really, again, it was just. It. It couldn't have gone much better. And it was almost more fun than if they would have just like, if they would have been playing a team that. That, that was like, inferior to them and they were just kind of like teeing off on them. I mean, that would have been kind of cool. But this was a game where they went up against a team that was really good and really looked like was going to beat them, and then they didn't let it happen and didn't give up.

[Andrew]

Like, and the fact that the rally happened so late in the game, so, I mean, literally so late in the

[Luke Burbank]

season and with two outs at a certain point, like, you know, Armani, if he doesn't get that hit, if he. If he doesn't make it to first before they throw to first inning over.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

And then if he doesn't steal home inning, like, game over. I should say so. I'm very, very proud of the. Of the junior sluggers and me too, forward to looking forward to next season.

[Andrew]

And my teasing, of course, towards Coach Ben, I assume is. Is going to be accepted in the spirit with which I say it.

[Luke Burbank]

You guys are actually very similar.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

You're both Ohioans.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Did you hear his Ohio. You'd hear a bit of that Ohio accent coming out. He's a Shaker Heights guy.

[Andrew]

I didn't notice that he was exhorting the team.

[Luke Burbank]

You guys both also like to kid too hard.

[Andrew]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

But.

[Andrew]

But in all seriousness, though, and, and kidding aside and teasing aside, I. I am very appreciative of coach Ben for giving us to Be a part of these kids lives and these games. Like no joke. And also just the joy that coach Ben has brought the TBTL listeners. I'm getting so many emails from people. And also our friend Mary, who I saw at Pop Up a couple of weeks ago, was just mentioning again the rancher and raver exactly how just she knows something about writing. Right. And just couldn't stop talking about how great coach Ben's updates are and his writing and the inspiration that he brings the tens, like that's a real thing. So if I can put my sarcasm aside for a moment, I just want to thank him and the team again for giving us this opportunity. It's really, really been fun for the show.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, being there was. I will say of this. Are we still in spring? It's not summer yet, right? Probably. This is one of the highlights of my spring. I'm not even kidding. Which is getting to watch them play baseball and get the beer on everybody. So, you know, upward and onward towards next season. Can't, you know, pitchers and catchers report. Yeah, in nine months. Andrew, as I always say, we was hoping for some razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle. That's right, man.

[Herm Edwards]

Razzle dazzle.

[Luke Burbank]

On your mark.

[Coach Ben]

On your mark.

[Andrew]

Get set, get set now.

[Coach Ben]

Ready, ready.

[Luke Burbank]

Go. Everybody rattle dazzle, everybody.

[Andrew]

All right.

[Luke Burbank]

Let's thank some dazzling donors. Much like we are the patrons of the tbtl. Junior Sluggers Jalapenos. These are the patrons of tbtl. And the way we can be the patrons of the Little League team is because of the donations that we get from folks like Rebecca Butler out there in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

[Andrew]

Thank you, Rebecca.

[Luke Burbank]

Rebecca says, hey, friendos. Last year I used my dazzler to remind you to hug someone consensually. Obs touch helps reduce stress hormones. Even a self hug counts. So again, hug somebody today with consent. Why don't you hug a potato like everybody else?

[Andrew]

I went to fist bump somebody the other day and she did not want to touch me.

[Luke Burbank]

And that was a stranger.

[Andrew]

It was a woman who is Lucy. It was Lucy. I said bump, bump. No, you know, it would. I don't know why I brought this up. It's clearly living in my head. It's a woman who is at pop up. She's like a customer. So she's somebody who comes through the line and gets a bunch of food from us. And she is somebody who is usually the very first person there. She's the very first person in line. Sometimes she helps out a little bit, but usually she's just sort of Waiting. She's also a little bit persnickety about things. She's one of those people who wants things in a very, very specific way or will sort of let you know if she, like, would prefer if you had a different kind of food or beverage or something like that. But she's generally a good person or woman. I'm going to put her maybe 15 years older than me or something like that. And I will say that sometimes, depending on my mood, my interactions with her are warm. And this. I'm putting this totally on me. They can be warmer or they can be. Sometimes I'm like, I just don't know if I really have tons of time to deal with what you're putting out there today. But it's never unpleasant. I don't think it's ever been unpleasant. But. But we're generally friendly. And I was in a very gregarious mood, honestly, Sunday, and I was kind of bopping around. We're about to start Twisted season. That would add a dynamic, wouldn't it? But it's like all the customers are chill. But why is that volunteer slurring his words? But anyway, I was just kind of like, I was just kind of feeling myself and whatever. And then I. And what we do out there often, whether it's between volunteers or people come through the line, if you're going to greet or touch in any way, a fist bump is usually kind of a very safe way to sort of like, you know, not make people feel on the spot about touching you or whatever. And also we're handling food and stuff and it's just kind of a thing that I'm just in the habit of sort of kind of lightly fist bumping my friends out there. And I went to sort of fist bump her and she kind of just pulled back a little bit. And then she did do this gesture where she put her hands together in front of her like a kind of. And did a little bit of a. Did a little bit of a nod towards me. And I think that was her way of saying, like, I'm not comfortable being touched, which is totally fine. So if this story started with me sounding like I was put off, like it was one of those things because I am such a God darn weirdo. In that moment, I knew intellectually exactly what she was doing. She was sharing my greeting with me, but in a way that made her feel more safe and comfortable, which is totally her right to do. But also, I'm a goddamn weirdo. I'm kind of like, you could have just Fist bump me there. I still was kind of like I

[Luke Burbank]

was wondering about the sort of acceptability of offering a fist bump to a runner that I did not know I was running on Sunset a couple weeks ago or whenever it was when I was in LA and there was another runner coming in the other direction. And I feel very bonded to the other runners on Sunset because it's kind of a, A, it's kind of a situation out there. There's just like a lot of. Like I said, there's a lot of stuff to step over and to avoid. There's a lot of stoplights. There's a lot of drivers who might mow you down. It's just kind of like it's. It's a chaotic environment that I kind of weirdly love. But also I feel like we're in this together, me and the other joggers out there on Sunset in the morning. And this guy was coming from the opposite direction. And I was really tempted to just kind of like. Because I wave if there's a jogger. You know, if I'm crossing. Not crossing paths, but coming from opposite directions, I'll give a wave. And I almost just wanted to fist bump this guy and like throw my fist out there. But I was like, that is really. I mean, I don't think it's. I don't think it's inappropriate. Well, I don't think it's inappropriate. But also asking a complete stranger to fist bump you as opposed to even this person at Pop up who you kind of know who you've interacted with a lot. I didn't, but I was wondering. I also would not have done that if it was a woman, obviously.

[Andrew]

But like, what about a dog?

[Coach Ben]

I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

I fist. You know what? I'm. What? I'm always out there high fiving. People get annoyed at me. Is. I'm obsessed with the cooler robots that are all on Sunset.

[Andrew]

Oh, the robots. Oh, yeah. That I have little.

[Luke Burbank]

They look like a cooler on wheels. They got a flag coming off.

[Andrew]

I thought you meant, like, I'm not into the nerdy robots. I'm only in the.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm only the cool ones. Yeah, the robots that. They all have names like Coco and Oto and whatever. And I, I've. I've said before on the show, I don't understand how they work. I don't know what the app would be. I've never seen. I've seen them moving occasionally. I've never seen someone getting something out of them.

[Andrew]

I would just be looking for The John Mulaney app. I don't know. He had one on his.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, right. Because that. Of course they had one on that show. What was that one called?

[Andrew]

I don't know. But I was embarrassed on TBTL when you told me, like, that's not the real brand. That's a joke brand that they use.

[Luke Burbank]

But it's such a great name. It's like a perfect play on what these people. But I'm. These are the weird. They are sort of the weirdest things to me because, like, I understand Waymo. I take Waymos. I see people in waymos. Like, I don't know how people are ordering stuff from these robots. And then where the robot goes, like, if you order something on doordash, a human being grabs the thing and then they bring it to the. Maybe hotel lobby, if that's where you're staying, or the front of your apartment building or whatever. I don't really know how to interact with these robots on wheels other than to low five them when I run past them. And I've been putting videos of it on Instagram, and some people are like, this is not good. Do not celebrate the robots.

[Andrew]

Oh, don't praise the machine.

[Luke Burbank]

Don't praise the machine. Let's praise Rebecca Butler and let's finish reading this message. Rebecca says, this year, I also want to share about an org that I volunteer with. It's called In Kind Baking Project. We're a volunteer nonprofit in the Philly area, connecting home bakers with community orgs and neighbors who could use some kindness and joy. What started in 2017 as a way to welcome immigrant communities has now reached 50,000 plus people.

[Andrew]

Holy macaroon.

[Luke Burbank]

Holy big numbers. Our volunteers bake and deliver homemade treats to orgs that support youths or utes. Rebecca wonders folks navigating transitions and people facing hardship and food insecurity. Wow. They're baking and delivering home goods to people that could really use it. Just in it for the big bucks.

[Andrew]

Yeah, sick.

[Luke Burbank]

Baking for someone else is a small act of resistance. It interrupts isolation and it turns frustration into joy. It's a way to say what you do is so important. That's such a really a good point. I mean, on this show, oftentimes related to dazzling donor messages or whatever, we're grappling with this question of like. Like pushing back against the darkness and resistance and how we all feel just kind of like under threat all the time in this current political environment. But yeah, I could see how baking a bunch of cinnamon rolls, knowing that they're going to go to people who could really use a cinnamon roll in their day would like. Somehow I could see it being empowering to feel like the world isn't quite as dark as it feels. So what a great idea. Rebecca says bake, donate, deliver joy. You can check it out at in kind bakingproject.org that's in kind bakingproject.org in these unreasonable times, be unreasonably kind. Oh, there's my next speech.

[Andrew]

There it is.

[Luke Burbank]

I got to get back on the keynote speaking circuit. That is a good framing situation. Rebecca, what are you going to say?

[Andrew]

Andrew I was going to say that I am on the website right now for in kind bakingproject.org because I was curious if this is still just a Philadelphia thing or if it's expanded to other cities. And I'm actually on the Frequently Asked Questions page right now and says, do you bake in my town? I think this is maybe useful information for people who want to get involved in some way or another. It says we are currently most active within the city of Philadelphia, with occasional requests in the surrounding counties, including New Jersey. That said, we are always open to new partnerships and expanded geographies, provided we have bakers in that area. If you would like to see more events in your town, feel free to be an ambassador. If you'd like to help expand our efforts, drop us an email in kindbaking phlmail.com you can also just go to the website that we've already given out a couple oftimes in kindbakingproject.org and you can get the information there. But you know, there might be. I mean, I just know that we have a lot of people who love baking in our audience and maybe there's somebody who would be interested in looking at being an ambassador in some way or expanding it out. I'm not trying to get ahead of ourselves here, but I just want to let people know that that is an option. The organization looking for people even outside of Philadelphia who might want to get involved in some way or another.

[Luke Burbank]

And yeah, our listeners tend to love baking and helping people, so this could really bring together a couple of their passions. Rebecca says, and thanks for all you do to deliver joy to us. Tens I didn't want to leave out the part that pats us on the back.

[Andrew]

No, absolutely not. And also, you know, I've been into branding lately. Was that off air on air that I was giving you branding ideas? I can't remember, but I would suggest maybe the tagline let's get get baked for oh yeah, Baking project. Throwing that out.

[Luke Burbank]

You're thinking of that other part from Dazed and Confused.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I probably am.

[Luke Burbank]

Thanks, Rebecca. We really appreciate you. Maestro, on your mark.

[Coach Ben]

On your mark.

[Andrew]

Get set, get set now.

[Coach Ben]

Ready?

[Luke Burbank]

Ready, Go. Everybody rattle D. It's our friend Kenneth Nay out there in Ypsilanti, Michigan. I always think. I mean, Ken is one of the sweetest dudes you'll ever meet, but I just always think of him as Ken the knife wielder.

[Andrew]

Yes. From our adventures in Florida.

[Luke Burbank]

That was Florida, right?

[Andrew]

I believe so. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

We had a cake.

[Andrew]

Yep.

[Luke Burbank]

And we didn't have a knife. And we were also walking down the street. I feel like there was a lot going on. This was after some event. And I remember, I think Ken dashed into a restaurant or something and got

[Andrew]

knocking on the window of a restaurant with a knife, wanting another knife.

[Luke Burbank]

Got somehow got someone to loan us a knife and. And then came down the street holding the knife aloft because he had. He had retrieved the tool that we needed. Ken says hi, Luke, Andrew, and John. I filled this out real late because I procrastinated and eventually forgot about it. But I was pretty motivated after Michigan's huge college basketball win yesterday. Okay, so that. That puts this back in March, I guess. I'm guessing that that would have been in the tournament. Congrats to Yaxel Trey, Roddy Williams, A Day Morez Nimri, and finals MVP Elliott. I'm guessing those are. Oh, yeah. Michigan won the whole thing. I forgot about that.

[Andrew]

Oh, okay. I didn't know that I. Fab Five,

[Luke Burbank]

Freshman guy, but okay, we'll take it. How many of the Fab Five freshmen can you name?

[Andrew]

Let's see here. Y' all start eating cars, then you start eating bars. Fab Five, Freddy.

[Coach Ben]

What?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that was good.

[Andrew]

That was pretty close. Yeah, that was.

[Luke Burbank]

I used to. Back in my, you know, high school basketball days, I could have named them. Michigan, back in the. Back in the day, had these five freshmen that were absolutely phenomenal. And they were just, like, a phenomenon both in basketball and just in, like, culture. And they wore. Their shorts were really long. I feel like they were the first guys I saw wearing their basketball shorts long. And I was like, that's what I'm doing now. It was like, Chris Weber. It was Jalen Rose. Those were like sort of the two big stars. And then it was, oh, man, was it. This is not fun for anyone except me and Ken. But, Ken, congratulations to Michigan for winning the. The national championship. It was a great year. And with. And with Dusty May as The head coach for a while. Are you sure Dusty May isn't a country singer that did our. Our. Our show at Stubbs? Oh, wait, that was Shaky Graves. Dusty May's a heck of a name for your coach.

[Andrew]

Yeah, Dusty May. I could see, like, Dusty May's Greatest Hits definitely has, like, a pickup truck on the COVID right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Oh, without a doubt. With Dusty May as the head coach for a while, hopefully the future continues to look bright. The Big Ten is also the current men's and women's basketball champions, as well as winning the last three college football championships. I'm pretty happy despite the political climate. Hey, Ken, that's. That's you finding some joy in the Big Ten. I love that for you. I do think the midterms will be great for the Dems as long as the elections are free and fair. Well, from your lips to God's ears, Ken. I'm holding out. I'm holding out hope. I think the hope battery. Andrew, we're not having this conversation right now. I'm really not trying to get into handicapping the politics of the midterms, but I think I can feel the hope battery recharging in me a little bit.

[Andrew]

Oh, good. I wasn't sure how you were going

[Luke Burbank]

to finish that sentence because it was pretty depleted, obviously after the last presidential election. I do think the midterms will be great for Dems as long as the elections are free and fair. Switching back to tbtl, I'm happy to be able to dazzle. For the second year in a row, I hope to see a live show in the future. We hope to do a live show in the future, Ken. So those may dovetail. I missed the show in Friendship, Wisconsin, because I was on a family trip to Niagara Falls. So it's been a long time since I've seen you in Philly. The sooner you can tell us the dates, the better. Power out, Ken. I can't tell you the dates, but what I can tell you is we are having conversations about things. In fact, we're having those conversations before the show. So when we know and when we have more info, we will pass that on and we will give everybody plenty of heads up on things that are happening.

[Andrew]

I mean, is it okay for me to say that? And I'm not saying this is definitely the next live show we're going to do. We might do one in between now and then, but I know a lot of people are asking questions about the 5,000. We have not made any solid plans about anything yet. That's still a Ways away. In fact, it's still over a year away. But we can tell people that we've looked at the calendar, and it looks like it is, like the 5,000th episode as it stands right now. Looks like it's going to be hitting somewhere in June, probably around Memorial Day weekend. But again, I'm not saying that we're doing something on that weekend. We don't know yet. But if we're looking at the calendar just counting days, 20, 27 around Memorial Day, that looks like where the energy is, is. Is being pushed. So I don't know. We'll see. And again, I'm not withholding anything here. That's literally all we know.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes, but people also have calendars, so some of them may have done the math themselves. But, yeah, let's confirm that, that that's what we've got circled on the calendar. We are going to do a big thing for the 5,000th. We don't know what that big thing is yet, but it will be happening. And. And we will. When we lock in on a date, we will shout it from the mountaintop so that everybody can make their plans if they would like to come hang out with us. And I mean, and again, we may have other stuff happening between now and then as well, but we will try to give everybody as much heads up. It's not going to be one of those things where we're like, we don't want to make a big deal of it. We're going to make too big of a deal of it. The listeners are going to be kind of sick of us by the. They're going to be like, all right, that was good. Let's shut it down after our 5,000.

[Andrew]

I'm going to be 50 years old for the 5,000th episode. I think you might be. You would be 50. You will be.

[Luke Burbank]

You would. I'll be 51. I'll be the elder statesman of podcast.

[Andrew]

Yeah, exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

I'll be the oldest podcaster in America at 51.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Possible no. Anyway, Ken, thanks, man. And go Wolverines.

[Andrew]

Hello, and welcome to Top Story.

[Luke Burbank]

All right, quickly, before we jump to the blurs days, Andrew, I'm sure you've seen the headline bouncing around about this Dodgers player playing in the minors, but who's a very highly prized prospect. A guy named Kendall George injuring his patellar tendon because he was trying to avoid the bat dog at this double A game, the Tulsa Drillers. Basically, what happens is this guy is on base and there's a hit and he's coming home. To score, he steps on home plate. And then, you know, our listeners may not know this, but a lot of minor league teams have trained dogs to go out and get the bat. So the guy hitting swings, hits the ball, drops the bat at home plate, runs to first at the major league level. That is a bat boy or a bat kid that goes out and gets those. I. It's. I think it's a fun gimmick that the Miners have embraced is like, what if we had a cute dog do it? And most of the time, I think that goes pretty well in this case. As Kendall George, I kind of. When I read the headline, I assumed he was, like, at home plate, and it was like a collision with the dog at home plate or the catcher was there. No, it was the play at home plate. The throw didn't even go home. It was unchallenged. He's just jogging in. He's stepping on home plate. It's as he's getting towards the dugout, the dog comes firing out to go get the bat and kind of runs towards him. And this guy kind of does an awkward jump to avoid the dog, and then he lands. And then this is the thing. And I know, I'm such a canineist, but, like, he throws his helmet down and is clearly pissed at the dog. He doesn't do anything to the dog. He's just obviously angry. Now, why?

[Andrew]

In the actual moment, right? Like, yeah, he's, like, in the moment. Immediately, he realizes as he's avoiding the dogs, I'm kind of watching, watching it over and over here, because I only saw this once the other day when it came across my transom. He. He kind of lifts his leg up to avoid the dog, and then immediately he can feel that something is wrong in his knee, and he comes down weird, and he starts hopping, and he's like, oh, my God, I'm hurt.

[Luke Burbank]

And he's mad. He's like, now, again, this is a guy whose entire livelihood is dependent on his knee working, and he just injured it to a degree that he's not quite sure about. So I get that it's like a stressful moment for him, and his. His career may be flashing in front of his eyes. I don't want to minimize that, but I swear to God, if anybody says anything mean to that perfect angel of a dog that I saw running at, all the dog was doing was what it was doing is supposed to do. And of course, they. There's some. I don't know if there's a person. There's probably a Person holding the dog back. The dog is. They're never going to send the dog out when there's still a play at the plate. Like, I honestly feel like this is kind of. It's half on the Dodgers prospect and half on the dog. Because he had options, he could have taken a different line to the dugout. Again, he's not at the plate.

[Andrew]

He's.

[Luke Burbank]

In my mind, this is 50.

[Andrew]

50.

[Luke Burbank]

They. The.

[Andrew]

The.

[Luke Burbank]

I think this is him not being aware where the dog was, and this is whoever was handling the dog not being aware. I'll tell you who's blameless in this. The dog. And. But I went from being like, oh, man, when I read the headline, I was like, oh, that really sucks for that guy that he got injured avoiding the bat dog. And then when I saw the anger on his face and knew that it was directed even just sort of emotionally and sort of spiritually at the dog, I immediately became team dog and wished nothing but bad upon Kendall George. And that's not the right response, but that's what I'm telling you. What my. What my. When someone is mad at an animal that didn't do anything intentionally wrong, they're on my list.

[Andrew]

Well, I'm not mad at anybody, but I will just say that, like, if he's mad, maybe he should be mad at his strength and conditioning team. Because, like, as I watched this video over and over again, the dog did not do anything that made him. Made him, like, kind of have to do something so physically unusual that he should have hurt himself. He just lifts his. He just lifts his leg up like that's it. Like, it doesn't. He's not contorting himself in some way.

[Luke Burbank]

He does a little jump.

[Andrew]

He kind of jumps and brings down

[Luke Burbank]

when he lands from the jump. I think that's when he messes up. Yeah.

[Andrew]

But I mean, again, like, that could have easily been a ball coming his way or something like that when he was on the base path or something. Like, there's.

[Luke Burbank]

He.

[Andrew]

The dog does not cause him to do anything strange. It's just one of those weird moments. I mean, who was it? Our former closer who went over to the Mets and then got injured? He was like, the best closer in baseball a couple years ago. Might still be.

[Luke Burbank]

I can never remember his last name,

[Andrew]

but he got hurt, you know, in the Baseball World Classic, celebrating, just jumping off the mound or something like that. And so, like, I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

You're right.

[Andrew]

I don't think you'd be mad at this dog.

[Luke Burbank]

But again, Edwin Diaz, maybe.

[Andrew]

Diaz is exactly who I was talking about. But, you know, that's also a split second in time. All this guy, he looks mad because his, his knee hurts in that moment. You know what I mean?

[Luke Burbank]

Who knows? But he's not just like, like he's mad at the dog. And I mean, right? Like, because if he would have just twisted his knee. And again, he gets to be mad, he gets to be upset that he hurt his knee, but, like, he looks back towards the dog. Here's what I'm reading in his reaction. He never liked that dog.

[Andrew]

Oh, interesting that.

[Coach Ben]

Have you.

[Luke Burbank]

You've watched his reaction too, right?

[Andrew]

Yeah, I was just watching it over just that very, very split second though. And we gotta. We're judging.

[Luke Burbank]

Slams down his. He slams down his batting helmet. He just. He yells something. I'm not a. I'm not a John Boy. I can't read lips. I actually been finding myself watching that John Boy stuff.

[Andrew]

Oh, my God, I'm obsessed. Have you seen his breakdown of Josh Naylor when he was still a guardian? Or maybe. No, maybe they weren't called the guardians at that point where Josh Naylor is just going around saying, they fed me. You have to watch it. It's one of the most amazing John Boy videos, especially given our love of Josh Naylor. It's this whole thing about how his team was down against, I want to say a Chicago team, but I could be wrong about that. Playing on the road and the fans are heckling him and giving him a hard time and then that ends up like, fueling him and he ends up.

[Luke Burbank]

I.

[Andrew]

It's not a walk off situation, but he ends up winning the game for Cleveland and like, they're doing a lot of the. The lip reading, but also you could hear Josh is screaming like, they fed me. He's like going insane. He's going.

[Luke Burbank]

That's so funny because his personality seems so. Yeah, not that typically, like, he's. I mean, he's got his whole own energy out there, which is. Yeah, they'll study for years to come. Like what his deal is. And I love his deal, obviously, but it's not strictly, like, it's not that intense. It's not that. I got your ass.

[Andrew]

No, you gotta watch. I've watched that probably like five times. I just keep showing it to people. Anyway, do recommend that, but yeah, I mean, I guess I wish, I do

[Luke Burbank]

wish this guy the best, but I don't want them to stop having bat dogs because I love that.

[Andrew]

And also, let's not bury the lead on These unis, man, these Tulsa jersey, what do you think of the. Are you still. Do you have eyes on this jersey? This Tulsa jersey is sweet. I love that font. It's like a. It's a. Like a rich blue jersey with like kind of a scripty Tulsa across it with a long head on the T that goes. That slashes through the curve.

[Luke Burbank]

I feel like I've seen that. That I've seen Tulsa being written that way other places. Is that like the official. Is there an official Tulsa A font or something?

[Andrew]

I don't know. This is like. I'm seeing it. And then it's got the LA logo on the. On the shoulder, which I didn't know that they did that like the. Obviously the Rainiers. But what is this? Is this Triple A? This. This is Double A.

[Luke Burbank]

So that would be Tulsa Drillers of Double A. And it feeds up, I believe, to the Dodgers.

[Andrew]

But like, are the Everett Aqua socks. Are they part of the. The. The Mariners system?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, they used to be. That's a good question.

[Andrew]

But like, do the. Do the Mariners have their logo? I guess. Guess is my question on the minor league team sleeves or is this an LA thing? It's kind of cool, actually.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Yeah. Let's see. Everett Aqua socks. Yeah, well, there's a Mariner. I can never say this. Andrew Trident. Yeah, trident. The E in the Everett Aqua socks on its side. Actually, maybe this is a trident, at least in this one that I'm looking at.

[Andrew]

Yeah, no, that is the. Yeah, the E is the. Is the Aqua Sox logo is like the Mariners trident sort of turned on it. Its side. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

So they do. So I just was wondering if they still fed up to the Mariners or not, because I feel like I haven't. What I haven't heard about when I'm like listening to a Mariner game is like, so and so did this for the Aqua socks tonight. You know, that's kind of how I always track what our minor league system is. You know, it's like, what was the Arkansas Travelers or something?

[Andrew]

Yeah, the Travelers. And I think, yeah, they. They did this big shakeup that was in the interest of mega millionaires who run the mlb. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Arkansas Travelers does sound like a group of guys who would start a roofing job on an old lady's house, but then abscond with most of the money.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I like that. People always get really excited about the, like, I can't remember what town it is, but like the MLB announcers love mentioning like the so and so trash pandas, which is Like a minor league

[Luke Burbank]

team, you know, Two laser cats for me.

[Andrew]

Yeah. And, you know, a trash panda sling for, like, a raccoon. Raccoon. So is that a blueberry we heard there? But thank you. I did. I couldn't think of the word.

[Luke Burbank]

Sorry. I felt my. I felt my oxygen oxidant levels rising and I had to anti them.

[Andrew]

No, absolutely understand. Blueberries healthy during the show. But anyway, like, yeah, that's just a little bit too, like. Oh, isn't that clever? Like, I like the. I like the Travelers because it's just, like, so workman like.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that is true. It's. It's not too. It's. It's not part of a trend. There's no clever memeification of Travelers right now. So I'll give that to on. There's a right way to rock and

[Andrew]

a wrong way to roll. You can't just listen to your song. Just remember that life is number one. You can be having so much fun. Just remember that life is much fun. You can be nothing but one. Can you take a note, Luke?

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew]

We got a voice memo from our friend Lisa in the Chicago area. Formerly from Southern California, San Diego. San Diego.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, Oceanside, I think.

[Andrew]

Oceanside. Yeah. I couldn't think of the town. She sent us a great story about her getting out of a ticket and she had. She showed up in court, my friend. It is a wow, you need men standing on those walls type of story. And I am very.

[Luke Burbank]

We've had a lot of people weighing in on Genevieves.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

All kinds of tips and tricks.

[Andrew]

Exactly. So I want to play that for. I want to play it for you right now, but it's. We can't. We don't have time. We have blurs days, but I'd really like to get to that in tomorrow's show. I thought it'd be funny if I said, we don't have time for that. And then I just let the music play for, like three and a half minutes. If you have a birthday to celebrate, send it my way. Put blursday in the subject line and send it to this email address, andrewbtl.net we will wish you a happy blursday. We will wish your friends and loved ones happy blurs days. I got this note from Virginia that says, happy blursday to Holly. You save pups lives and make mine bright. Thank you for being you and being my friend. Cute. You know what? You know what Holly thinks of that story we're just talking about. She's definitely siding with the bat dog. Do we have a name on that bat dog, by the way. Did you say it? No.

[Luke Burbank]

And that's.

[Andrew]

That's criminal.

[Luke Burbank]

That is absolutely. I don't care about the first round prospect for the Dodgers organization. They've had enough. I want to know the name of that bat dog and I want to make sure that that bat dog is being protected. Nobody is allowed to be mean to that bat dog.

[Andrew]

So they're called the Tulsa Drillers. They've suspended their bat dog program. No, this decision followed a freak accident. Now this is AI overview. But it's.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, this was exactly what I was worried about.

[Andrew]

According to the AI over MLB bat dog program reportedly to be suspended. This is from Bleacher Report.

[Luke Burbank]

But does it get us program wide? All of the bat dogs are now

[Andrew]

gonna be for this particular team? I think so.

[Luke Burbank]

It's only for the Drillers.

[Andrew]

That's my understanding. It looks like the Dodgers are thinking about stopping this program

[Luke Burbank]

or train the dogs how to hit. Put them on the team.

[Andrew]

What about that? Don't run from it.

[Luke Burbank]

Run towards it.

[Andrew]

It. I like that. I'm looking here to see if they name the dog. You know, they might be protecting the name of the dog because they don't want the dog to get like hate mail. Yeah, I could absolutely see.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, I found it. It's.

[Andrew]

It's.

[Luke Burbank]

They call them Old Knee Buster.

[Andrew]

Old Knee Buster. Oh, that makes sense. Old wet knees. By the way, happy birthday, Holly. I think Holly might be in my old neck of the woods of Lakewood, Ohio. Or used to be. Or I'm confusing you with somebody else. Either way, I hope you have a great birthday. Lisa in Bend says, ah, I'm time banditing. And somehow that also makes my blurs day shout out for my friend Maya late. That is not really an excuse, but it is all I have. Sorry, Maya. You're an awesome friend and my favorite 10 to attend live events with. I hope we can catch up IRL soon and that your birthday was awesome. Happy blursday, Maya. Denny says I'm writing a narcissistic email to thump my chest for my Golden Blurs Day. 76 years.

[Luke Burbank]

76 years, Denny.

[Andrew]

Nice. And Denny gives his last name. Here says Denny Gammer. My comedic cousin used to call me Gummer. That might be the name of the bat dog.

[Luke Burbank]

Happy birthday, Denny.

[Andrew]

76? Absolutely.

[Luke Burbank]

Heck yeah, man.

[Andrew]

76 years young, Denny often sending us emails. Been a part of TBTL for a long, long time. Also got this note. Happy blursday to Nancy from Meg. Do you remember the time we went to the King's Table buffet on Lake City Way to celebrate your birthday in 1989. We had iron stomachs back then. Cheers.

[Luke Burbank]

I went to that King's Table, by the way, on Lake City Way.

[Andrew]

I'm mad that I called it the King's Table. That was a typo of my mouth.

[Luke Burbank]

King's Table. Did you have those in Ohio?

[Andrew]

No. I've never heard of this. Tell me everything.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, it was. Yeah. I actually remember we went when I was a very, very, very little kid. I remember going to a King's Table in Eureka, California. So I would have been, like, under the age of four. But then I don't know if I. Yes. I think at one point we. I might have actually gone to the Lake City one. But what I really know is that we drove past it every single Sunday on our way to church. And it was. I don't know if, you know, I don't know what's there anymore. But it was kind of like the part of where. So you're going. You're past the Eagles now, Andrew. So you're heading north on Lake City Way.

[Andrew]

Right. Okay. You're getting. You're heading down, like, towards the Wendy's, but you're probably nowhere near that far down yet.

[Luke Burbank]

You're just going down that hill. Right. So you're past. You're. It's kind of that area where there's. There aren't any businesses. It's kind of a green space.

[Andrew]

Yeah. And that old dive bar that just closed down. The Shanty Tab.

[Luke Burbank]

Past the Shanty. So you keep going past the shanty and you kind of get into this part, if my memory serves, where it's. There's the big, high kind of, I don't know, area on one side. It's just. It's not like. It's not a bunch of businesses. It's kind of a little more green space. And then you kind of bottom out and you start to move to the left. And now you're. That's right where I think there's like a. Like a keg store or beer store on the right or something that sells beer on the right. And on the left is what used to be the King's Table, then it became an Italian restaurant for many, many years that had a gondola guy painted on it. And I think now it's just like some kind of business park.

[Andrew]

It might have been the Growler Guys. Isn't the Growler Guys around here? Is that.

[Luke Burbank]

It is. But the Growler Guys is in what used to Be Ying's Chinese Restaurant. That's much closer to the. That's much closer to the. The Eagles. But anyway, I know that King's Table. I'm just saying I used to look. And then when it switched to being an Italian restaurant, I was like, what are they doing? I mean, how could you get rid of a king's table? Because the King's table was a buffet.

[Andrew]

Yes, it's a buffet. And so was it. And it was it like middle aged, like kind of Knights of the Round Table sort of themed or.

[Luke Burbank]

You just definitely wasn't like a medieval times level. It might have had some of the pictures or whatever. Let's see. I remember. Well, I mean, let's. I thought that Herm Edwards was Stephen A. Smith. So let's take. When I say I remember, let's all just pick up a salt lick and carry it around. But I seem to remember being in the King's Table in Eureka and overhearing some older kids that I was with, maybe people that were in their teens or twenties, talking about having seen the movie Jaws. If this freezes it in time. I remember being in the. Walking into the bathroom of the King's Table in Eureka to, you know, obviously, like use the bathroom or whatever and overhearing these kids. So I have this sense memory we were with, talking about seeing Jaws and

[Andrew]

you think it was Jaws in the theater? Like, you think it was just out?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, because I don't think there was any VHS at that time.

[Andrew]

It would have had to have been jaws was 75. You would have been like one.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, yeah. Well, maybe. Okay, so I definitely couldn't have been one. Maybe it was Jaws two.

[Andrew]

Yeah, maybe it was. Maybe it was a different movie or something like that.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, or a different movie. I, I have this, like, these are what. This is what the kind of like, sense member of it is. The bathroom door of the King's Table. An older kid talking about a movie that sounded very scary and grown up to me. Those are the things. I think I just inserted Jaws into the mix because that seemed about the time. But it could have been anything.

[Andrew]

But anyway, Jaws 3D was 1983, which might put it. That could have been.

[Luke Burbank]

That could have been it. Well, no, because we moved. No, no, because we moved to. We moved to. We lived in Seattle when Mount St. Helens exploded. Because I remember looking at the newspaper and seeing that Mount St. Helens. And that was 81.

[Andrew]

That was 81. Okay, well, I'm just gonna list every scary movie, every movie that I find scary between 1977 and 1981.

[Luke Burbank]

Rosemary's Baby.

[Andrew]

Rosemary.

[Luke Burbank]

Rosemary's baby's baby.

[Andrew]

Honey, I shrunk Jerry's baby.

[Luke Burbank]

This was the thing. I don't think I was in a king's table in Eureka, Andrew. I think I was in a royal fork because the royal fork was what preceded the king's table.

[Andrew]

Really.

[Luke Burbank]

The business was called royal fork and then they changed the name to king's table.

[Andrew]

So in that they both have this sort of like. Yeah, like what's the bigly royal. Yeah. Holy fork and shirt balls. All right, you want to do one more of these?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I do.

[Andrew]

Hungry. We don't have buffets anymore. I kind of want to go to a buffet now. But the idea of a buffet would always be better than probably the reality of a buffet. Especially in 20.

[Luke Burbank]

I would go to a buffet at about 5pm yeah. In other words, I would need to be. For me, lunchtime hungry is not hungry enough to get my money's worth. Worth on a buffet.

[Andrew]

Oh, I see what you said. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

I need to. I need to build in multiple hours of caloric deficit. So when I walk in there, they just like lock the doors, guys. And hide the popcorn shrimp because I'm going for it.

[Andrew]

I'm there though. I didn't eat any breakfast today. Like it's 12 o'. Clock. I. I'm pretty hungry, you know. I'm not gonna tell you why my brain landed here. I was just thinking about food now, how hungry I am. And I was thinking about how I haven't been to the old Goldies card room in a while to watch a baseball game and eat my salt and pepper chicken wings or whatever. I sort of thinking, that's good buffet food, only it's not a buffet. But all that is to say is, Goldie's open is Goldie's. I drove by. So here's the deal. We can't get into the whole story now. I'll tell you about it some other time when you're older. But I found myself at Darrell's Tavern.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I want to hear this story.

[Andrew]

Camaro Kev in Roden on Saturday. I had no intention of going there, but I found myself there and then was texting them and they're like, where are you? We'll be there in a second. And then we ended up watching these. Were they recorded or something? No, I don't. I. I don't know. I think they were. They both happened to be free. I was just asking them because I was talking to the bartender about the. The show that was going to be playing there later to some very heavy.

[Luke Burbank]

Darryl.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I love Daryl's, but they always have live music at night. So I was like, I'm just here for a beer or two before. Before the music starts and the music. Then I told the guys I was there, and they're like, we'll be right over. And we're like, okay, okay. So they both came and then we ended up staying for the music. And it was a very interesting night. But the truth of the matter is, by the time we left, I was very into my cups to the degree that that was Saturday night. And it was one of those things. And I had not been like this in a minute, my friend. But I was on Sunday morning trying to be like, oh, yeah, Then. Then that happened. Then we took the E Line home back to my place, and I'm sort of like, kind of. And then you got all of those

[Luke Burbank]

guys on the E Line.

[Andrew]

The three of us took the E Line back from Daryl's, and then we got off at my corner kind of. And then there. And it was kind of cool because then there. There was that open air, like kind of taco truck. It's not a truck, but they sent up, like, they set up these tents in the parking lot right on the corner there. And so the guys got some sort of a late night, you know, street food thing while I ran to the a.m. p.m. To get us some beer that we could drink at home. And so anyway, it was just one of those foggy nights by this point, and foggy in my brain. And. And I'm just now remembering that as we drove past Goldie's heading south on the E Line, I think Camaro. Kev said, look, see, it's closed because some other company maybe has bought it but not reopened it yet or something. Do you know anything about this at all?

[Luke Burbank]

Yelp is tell. Yeah, well. Well, I know a little bit about maybe six months ago, I think it was called Maverick Gaming. It's a parent company that owned a bunch of casinos, including Goldie's, and they were shutting down a lot of the locations because I guess they weren't profitable. And Goldie's, though, somehow managed to stay open. And Yelp is telling me that it's open right now.

[Andrew]

Yeah, me too. I'm looking at Google, but I don't

[Luke Burbank]

know if we can believe Yelp or not, but there has been a lot of, like, yeah, that kind of local dingy casino scene has gone through a lot of changes. And a lot of the smaller Casinos have been shut down, which, you know, the nostalgia part of me is like, you know, of course I've spent. I've wiled away so many hours of my life and dollars of my bank account in a place like Goldie's, and I have a real emotional attachment to it, if I'm also being honest. And I said, what if we had fewer places where people, many of whom are dealing with addiction issues, could go and dump a bunch of money?

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Like, I don't know if they're exactly the healthiest thing for the community. So I don't know. I'm sort of. I'm sort of conflicted about it.

[Andrew]

But I will say, if this is open, I'm so hungry right now, and this is how I make all my decisions, what I would like to do. The Mariners are playing baseball tomorrow, though. Today. I can't. I got puppy kindergarten. I got stuff to do today.

[Luke Burbank]

You're already planning tomorrow.

[Andrew]

But if I'm.

[Luke Burbank]

If I'm planning rolling thunder.

[Andrew]

Here's my point. If I'm doing disciplined today, which I have not been lately, but if I'm disciplined today, and I can actually get some work done on the old TBTL newsletter today, when I'm done with TBTL tomorrow, I could hoof it on over. What time is the Mariners game? Tomorrow's probably.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a home game.

[Andrew]

Oh, then it's, like, gonna be. It's not even early. It's gonna be late. It's gonna be 6, 40, 7 o' clock at night or something like that. I could head over to Goldie's, just sit there by myself, pull tabs, eat some salt and pepper wings and watch the Mariners on the old television set.

[Luke Burbank]

It doesn't sound too bad. I'll be working. I'll be. I'll be burning the candle at every end, but I'll be. I'll be jealously thinking about you watching the Mariner sitting there at Goldie's.

[Andrew]

Yeah, that could be. That could be good. Should we do one more blurs day, or should we just, like, ice this person out? No, that's not in the spirit of the blurs days. But we are going to do something special here and not restart the music. Jacob in Edgewood says, because that way, everybody.

[Luke Burbank]

That's our special gift to you, Jacob.

[Andrew]

That's right.

[Luke Burbank]

You don't get not restarting the music.

[Andrew]

No, this is a gift. This is the iron glass gift.

[Luke Burbank]

He is the point in the clear.

[Andrew]

Exactly. The music goes away, and then you get closer to the radio. It sounds Even more important, Jacob in Edgewood says, my brother introduced me to this show when I was 19 back in 2009, and after a year or so of listening, I fell off. But in 2020, I rediscovered the show and have been a daily listener since. I've never been blursed before, so it seems like the only way I'll get blurs is if I blurs myself. So happy 36th Blurs Day to day.

[Luke Burbank]

Happy blurs.

[Andrew]

Happy blursday, Jacob. Thanks for giving us a second chance. And also, why isn't your brother blursing you?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, exactly. That's a.

[Andrew]

Is your brother still listening? I hope your brother's still listening. Even if he's not listening. He knows enough about your birthday and how blurs drink, Andrew. It. Drop a hint.

[Luke Burbank]

Drop a hint or two if you have to.

[Andrew]

Email address. That's right. That difficult.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, happy blurs day, everybody.

[Andrew]

Yeah, this week.

[Luke Burbank]

I think that's gonna do it for today's episode. Oh, by the way, happy birthday to my sister Sarah, who will never hear this. Yeah, she's. She's turning an age this week. I don't know what that age is. It's younger than me.

[Andrew]

Oh, did we sort of have a little celebration? We. Did we discuss a little celebration that you guys had for Sarah a couple of weeks ago as part of your birthday and Mother's Day as well. Was Sarah celebrating?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, what happened was my sister Liz, who's. All my sisters are incredibly thoughtful. I believe it was my sister Liz. It might have been Hannah. One of my sisters got Sarah a little something too, because they were like, well, we're not gonna see you again before this. And so essentially shifted the focus on her a bit, which I didn't appreciate.

[Andrew]

No, that does. It is a zero sum game when it comes to birthdays.

[Luke Burbank]

And you know me, if I'm not getting that birthday attention, it's like, am I even.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Do I even exist? But. All right, we are going to be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio to wrap up the week. Boy, this week really went by quickly, it seems. So please join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Thursday. Take care of yourselves, and please remember, no mountain too tall.

[Andrew]

And good luck to all.

[Dr. Gail Timlin]

Power out.