#4559 To The Victor Go The Spoils

Summary

TBTL #4559: "To The Victor Go The Spoils" – Detailed Episode Summary

Date: September 22, 2025
Hosts: Luke Burbank & Andrew Walsh

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Main Theme and Purpose

In this Monday episode, Luke and Andrew dive back into their signature blend of offbeat daily-life storytelling, sports anxiety, and earnest connection after Andrew's week-long absence following his mother’s passing. The episode weaves together personal vulnerability, the absurdities of modern life (from fruit flies to hotel conference rooms), and the emotional rollercoaster of being a Seattle sports fan. All the while, the two maintain their trademark self-effacing humor and warmth.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Andrew’s Return & Personal Loss (08:20–13:50)

• Andrew returns after a week away due to his mother’s passing, opening up about the complexities of grief and logistics.

• He thanks the listeners for "putting up with my absence, but maybe celebrating my absence," and clarifies why he’s been gone.

• Andrew shares quirky travel moments from his time in Arizona—a Marriott Bonvoy hotel with a depressing "driving school" sign, and the odd comfort of chain restaurants during difficult times.

  Notable Quote:
  "There is something about coming home... and just passing these two doors and thinking, there but by the grace of God go I... I don't have to wake up on a Saturday morning and check into DUI school." (11:40, Andrew)

2. Seattle Sports Euphoria & Anxiety (01:40, 32:42–52:05)

• Luke describes the unusual sensation of a Seattle sports weekend where "every machine I touched was spitting out a jackpot": Mariners sweep Houston, Seahawks win, Huskies win the Apple Cup.

• The hosts dissect the emotional stakes of being a Mariners fan—trauma from past heartbreaks, superstitions, and the collective exorcism of long-standing sports demons.

• Detailed recounting of the Mariners’ miraculous, against-the-odds win in Houston, emphasizing the “surrender cobra” (hands on head, elbows up) posture of the despairing fan—now, finally, turned into elation.

  Notable Quote:
  "I have never had a weekend like that... Every single sports outcome that I was hoping for [came true]. It felt like I was in a casino and every machine I touched was spitting out a jackpot.” (34:39, Luke)

  Memorable Moment:
  The discussion of Victor Robles’ game-winning catch is recounted with breathless joy and disbelief, including the subtleties of fan psychology and the shared tension with listeners ("Did he catch it? Did he trap it?... Something in the top five Mariner plays of my lifetime just happened here.” – 43:00, Luke).

3. All Roads Lead to Chili’s (13:50–18:28)

• The comfort of national chains like Chili’s as a balm for Andrew during his intense week in Arizona.
• A running joke about the absurd density of Chili’s restaurants in Mesa, AZ, with Andrew claiming "I got off the plane... and after a long day of pre-bereavement, I need a platter from Chili’s.”
• Geographic comedy ensues as the duo riff on possible Chili’s locations ("Surrounded by Chilies... it almost feels like sharks coming at you while you're floating in the ocean," Andrew, 17:30).

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4. Obsessing Over Fruit Flies and Modern Tech Annoyance (18:28–24:24)

• Luke and Andrew trade fruit fly war stories and vent about compost bins and counter pestilence.
• Theorizing about why fruit flies seem to appear as soon as they see TikTok ads for traps—"almost like Black Mirror, where they introduce the problem into your house as they serve you these ads" (21:22, Andrew).
• Shared mild frustration at smart-device password hurdles and two-factor authentication, referencing recent show tech troubles.

5. Doomscrolling: Media Control and Political Anxiety (24:24–31:06)

• Brief discussion on concerns over TikTok’s ownership shifting toward Trump-aligned investors, raising questions on censorship, misinformation, and the future of social media platforms as news sources.

• Andrew reflects on being in an environment (Arizona) where "Fox News is the norm," contrasting it with Seattle, and how this affects the "media landscape" and civic mood.

  Notable Quote:
  "The drumbeat is getting so much louder and scarier... every room you walk in, it's just like Fox News is the norm." (26:02, Andrew)

6. The Mariners, Twitter/X, and Fan Coping Mechanisms (31:06–64:42)

• The hosts reflect on how sports and social media comfort or torment them, especially when their teams are on a rare hot streak.

• Luke’s superstitions and recurring fantasy/dread cycles about the Mariners’ playoff prospects.

• The phenomenon of the "surrender cobra" during sports heartbreaks (48:22), and the sheer, almost embarrassing amount of joy in reliving the Mariners’ victory endlessly.

• Playful ribbing of their friend Ders for doom-and-gloom text chains about sports, and the camaraderie/discord that sports fandom breeds.

  Notable Quotes:

  • "I gave up on this team at least four times." (51:21, Luke)
  • "You’re already looking ahead to a multi-season dominance, a dynasty... you're already counting rings." (64:28, Andrew, teasing Luke)

7. The Joy of Josh Naylor and Mariners Baseball Fandom (52:05–58:04)

• Andrew confesses a deep, perhaps irrational, new fandom for Josh Naylor, the Mariners’ portly, unsmiling first baseman—a cult favorite for his quirks and sheer competence.

• Detailing the Mariners’ unique dugout rituals, especially the “Amazon trident” home run celebration, and the growing legend of Naylor’s personality.

  Memorable Quote:
  "He does this wincing at nothing that I associate with him so much... I am so deeply in love with him." (56:24, Andrew)

8. Cooking Confidence and Simmered Salty Somethings (72:19–76:35)

• Inspired by the rainy mood and football, Luke proudly improvises a vegetarian chili, realizing the liberatory power of home cooking outside strict recipes.
• Discussion of how autumnal weather triggers comfort-food traditions, like chili and jambalaya, for both hosts.
  Show title candidate: "Simmered Salty Somethings" (74:42).

9. Listener Feedback: Almonds vs. Beef & Environmental Impact (68:31–71:54)

• Listener Mary ("Our Pale Mary the Ranter") corrects misconceptions on almond production: pound-for-pound, beef and almonds use a similar amount of water.
• The hosts discuss the danger of out-of-context factoids and the guilt-inducing power of viral environmental stats.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Andrew, on “surrender cobra”:
  "It's when they put their hands or when we—because usually it's we—put our hands on top of our head so that our elbows are pointed out… You're a cobra. The surrender cobra." (48:22)

• Luke, sports catharsis:
  "Now I'm confronted with this idea of, like, what this fall might look like, what the next few months of our life might look like if [the Mariners] get to the postseason... If they did win a World Series, I'm not saying it would make up for the politics of this country, but it would be something that I would need." (58:04)

• Andrew, on his favorite Mariner:
  "I can't say my favorite Mariner of all time only played for us for three months... I am so deeply in love with him." (56:24–57:36)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• Andrew's Return & Grief: 08:20–13:50
• The Power of Chain Restaurants (Chili’s): 13:50–18:28
• Fruit Fly Tribulations & Algorithm Fears: 18:28–24:24
• Media Politics & TikTok: 24:24–31:06
• Seattle Sports Weekend Recap: 32:42–52:05
• Josh Naylor Fandom: 52:05–58:04
• Listener Email on Almonds & Beef: 68:31–71:54
• Chili Talk & Home Cooking Brag: 72:19–76:35

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Tone, Language & Humor

The episode remained compassionate, witty, and self-deprecating—especially during the heavier personal discussions. Both Luke and Andrew shift seamlessly from heartfelt sincerity (“First of all, I'm so sorry, Andrew…” 08:54, Luke) to light absurdity (Chili’s proliferation, surrender cobra, fruit fly paranoia) and the kind of meandering, sharply-observed comedy core TBTL fans love.

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Conclusion

“To The Victor Go The Spoils” is quintessential TBTL—heartfelt, absurd, neurotic, and grounded in friendship. Whether reflecting on personal loss, poking fun at their sports superstitions, reveling in an improbable Seattle sports triumph, or marveling at mundane troubles like fruit flies and hotel signage, Luke and Andrew create an episode that's comforting, funny, and real for old fans and new listeners alike.

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Power Out:

[“No, they have their own house. Power out.” – 78:18, Classic TBTL signoff, post-monkey anecdote]

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Transcript

[Andrew Walsh]

Before we say goodnight, I just want to take a moment to address any perceptions out there regarding bias in my reporting. In divided times such as these, I'm reminded of one of my great heroes, Walter Cronkite. Because of him, I have the integrity to stay firmly impartial. He gave me a gift I can Never repay. A $25 gift card to coconuts. If only I had used it before all their locations closed. Tbtl. I've seen it coming for years.

[Luke Burbank]

I've warned about it. I hoped with all my heart I.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wouldn'T experience it, I wouldn't see it.

[Luke Burbank]

But it's now here.

[Andrew Walsh]

What's even the point in this frickin podcast? Doesn't even make sense. Why would anybody listen to it?

[Luke Burbank]

I yell at you because I love you.

[Andrew Walsh]

You listen to me because you love me. Is this a weird dynamic?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, sure.

[Andrew Walsh]

From the outside.

[Luke Burbank]

You know what, dude? We can make a lot of money on this. If you're making these out of thin air, I mean, there's no overhead.

[Andrew Walsh]

We're gonna be rich.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, my God.

[Andrew Walsh]

One hundo a day.

[Luke Burbank]

Both hundo a week.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's rich. That's it.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, all right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Monday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Before you stews get busy, my name's Luke Burbank. I'm your host.

[Andrew Walsh]

Are you sure? Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

Coming to you from the Madrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia. Another beautiful, beautiful day here.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, ma pa. It's just beautiful.

[Luke Burbank]

Make it up to 85. 85 degrees.

[Andrew Walsh]

I feel warm and I'm levitating.

[Luke Burbank]

I think that's tomorrow, technically, but, man, it is. Summer is hanging in there and hanging on. We're hanging on. To bring you episode 4559 in a collector series. Let the fun begin. You know, if you all got a chance to catch Friday's show, my brother David from the basement was here, and we spent a significant portion of the program on Friday just kind of talking about our sports anxiety. It was a big sports weekend for Seattle sports fans. I mean, I figured he had to be in sport, but he wasn't in sport. And I was saying on Friday how like it was. It was an odd feeling because. And again, I want to recognize, like, on a certain level, none of this matters. It's just. It's me rooting for grown adults who have never taken one moment to consider my existence. And I'm rooting for them because of the jersey they're wearing. Okay, so that being established, I was saying on Friday how like I, it was strange because I was either going to be in the absolute depths of despair today or I was going to be euphoric. And instead I'm just somewhere in the middle. Things went really well and I don't know how to feel about that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Is this real life?

[Luke Burbank]

I think that's what being a Seattle sports fan as we'll talk about that a little bit. Also, there's a Robert Redford meme that's been going around for a long time. It's him in this movie, Jeremiah Johnson. And when he passed away, it was a chance for a bunch of people, particularly younger people, to learn that the person in the meme was Robert Redford.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know who that is and I don't care to find out.

[Luke Burbank]

We will talk about that too. And we'll talk to this guy. The longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. The guy is a nut bar. A nut bar. He's Andrew Walsh and he is joining me right now. Good morning, my friend. It's so nice to talk to you.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, you too. Thanks for holding down the fort. I think I almost said there. Thanks for having me back. But contractually you were obligated to have me back, I believe, as part of the legal agreement.

[Luke Burbank]

I tried while you were gone, legally, I tried every strategy I could to oust you. But it turns out you have an ironclad contract with tbtb.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I got some frantic emails from Bob, our lawyer, who said that somebody was trying to name.

[Luke Burbank]

I haven't thought about in a long time.

[Andrew Walsh]

Somebody trying to change the operating agreement.

[Luke Burbank]

Exactly. That was a thing. I felt bad that was happening to you last week because obviously you had a lot going on and I know you just kept getting pinged from systems that you're sort of the gatekeeper on that word gatekeeping. That term gatekeeping or gatekeeper has now become so kind of like energized and like stigmatized now. But I just meant you're the person who has a lot of the passwords and logins and I'd be trying to do something. And then I felt terrible because one of the mornings it was, it was pretty early and again, I know you were dealing with a lot of stuff and you're getting pinged by like, you know, Gmail because you want to let this person in.

[Andrew Walsh]

This is such a bad place to start the show, but it's exactly where I, I had in my head knowing that I was Gonna speak on the show for the first time in a week. There are so many things I wanna talk to you about that are technical. And I said don't start with it. Do not. There's so much to talk about. Do not start with the technical aspects of keeping the show afloat while I'm away. And here we are. How far did we make it into even my part of the show? Like 90 seconds before we got here at most. Cause I have so many questions. First of all, during your intro, I was replaying a conversation that you and I had off the air about some technical difficulties you had on Friday. And I think you solved it. I think I know what it was, but we don't have to get into it. But I just want you to know that I think I know something that I would have tried. We can talk about that next time. Secondly, yes.

[Luke Burbank]

Taking Riverside out and blowing in the cartridge.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, sometimes fast and cool, sometimes slow and hot. That's how you've got to read it. That's right. That's how that worked for ipdtl. I don't know if that will also work for Riverside.

[Luke Burbank]

Let me get another cigarette. I got a cigarette going for our one time attorney, Bo. And another one for IPDTL used to.

[Andrew Walsh]

Be such a part of our lives. Ipdtl, man, we talked about that a lot. And now it's hard to remember those letters. But yeah, it was kind of interesting. You were kind of lucky that you caught me at a certain moment because they are making it hard to. To share passwords these days. Yeah, they are. I was trying to read the Guardian the other day on my phone and I realized, oh, I can't log in because it's a relatively new phone and even though I have the password for our Guardian subscription, they still will send an email to Genevieve saying there's. There are marauders at the gate trying to read your Guardian articles. Can you. Will you allow this. Type in this code like. And that's what happened with. I guess you were trying to check the voicemail line. Right on like early Wednesday morning, I think.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. You had mentioned that there, you know, there might be some voicemails worth playing, which there were. We went real kind of roulette on it.

[Andrew Walsh]

I just seen. Oh, nice.

[Luke Burbank]

All I knew, I just basically grabbed the first, the most recent five voicemails or something at the time, dragged them onto the desktop, emailed them to myself and played them without pre listening. No, I only knew their length.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's great. I just feel like maybe we should do that more maybe I'm too precious with the voice.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, I think it was a nice. It was a nice. It's sort of. What's the word I'm looking for? I think it was fun because it's not what we always do.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, I think if a nice contrast. But the contrast only works because also usually you are pretty careful with them and you pick good ones and make them sound nice, et cetera. I think that the just. Let's just spin the wheel and see where it lands thing, it's fun for like one afternoon with Phyllis Fletcher. What.

[Andrew Walsh]

What would you think of maybe some time taking maybe a couple of weeks of TBT and actually getting a wheel, like actually literally getting a wheel, like a prize.

[Luke Burbank]

Andrew, I got news for you. Just over there behind my E bike.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know if you can see it.

[Luke Burbank]

Just see the edge of it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Go back. He's hiding behind it. Why are you hiding behind it during the blurs days?

[Luke Burbank]

Did you also have the prize wheel coming up this early in this Monday show that I got the tote wheel or whatever we were calling it, I.

[Andrew Walsh]

Didn'T even think things were going to get that bad. I didn't even predict that one. But yeah, no, it was. I feel. I think I said this to you again before the show. I feel like I've lived a thousand lifetimes since we last talked. I had a. And I appreciate the listeners. I was going to say putting up with my absence, but maybe celebrating my absence. I'm not sure. I stayed off of social media as much as possible, but yeah, it was a pretty serious time. I had to go to Arizona. My mom passed away and that sort of happened. I was able to get there in time. So that's why I had plans. I knew that she was in bad shape and I had plans to go there later in the week, as I had mentioned, but things sort of escalated quickly over the weekend. So I had to like email you and John on, I think Saturday or Sunday and just say, well, guys, emergency protocol enacted. And well, I have to say though.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, first of all, I'm so sorry, Andrew.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thanks. I appreciate it.

[Luke Burbank]

But also, you really, like, you really went above and beyond to leave us in pretty good hands. You sent me a bunch of intros. You sent all these logins to different things which, you know, maybe Gmail is being persnickety, but you have provided me with all the relevant information, like the difference between you having to deal with family stuff for a week and the amount of care and Worry you still put into the show happening versus me if and when this comes around for me, because I think it's coming around for all of us in one way or another. There will just be a cartoon cloud of dust where I was. That will be it. That'll be the extent of it. That'll be all. I'm passing. I'm like, I'm out, guys.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Like, you were very. We went above and beyond to make it so that the show could continue on pretty unaffected. Also, John did a really good job of the technical side, everything, you know, getting posted and stuff. So. But anyway, mostly and primarily I just want to say I'm really sorry, man.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thanks. I appreciate that. And the re. You know, I debated about whether or not to be totally forthright about that on the show, but I just, you know, thought if I were listening to this show, I'd kind of want to know more than just a family stuff, which is what we were saying. And I'm sure everybody would be fine with that. But I figured people would want to probably know why I was gone. Exactly. And that is why I was gone. Exactly. But I am doing fine. I appreciate, you know, a few people have reached out to me. Nobody needs to reach out to me. I am doing fine. And I. And I know that everybody is probably well have well wishes for me. I don't think that's the best way to put that. But I do think that it was a. It was a hell of a week, you know, I was in. Yeah, I mean, hey, I spent a week in Arizona. Putting everything aside. I. I have come back with stories of Arizona. I thought of you every time I passed this one room. I stayed at a Marriott. Bonvoy, Luke. I'm a Bonvoy and a Bonvoy to you, sir. And it was a. It was a very. It was a fine hotel, you know, kind of in the Mesa Air area and. But there was something that depressed me so deeply. And I'm not talking about the death of a family member here, oddly enough, it was the sign that hung on two conference room doors in this Marriott. And you know, like on the ground level it was like a. It was like only a three or four story building, but on the ground level near the stairs, there were two like small conference rooms. And taped to each of them, like just printed out on white paper and taped up there just with scotch tape was like as a driving school and AZ State driving school. And I'm guessing that that is where people go after they've gotten in trouble with the Law, probably dui. I'm guessing that was like, DUI University sort of. I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

But I just. There is something about just, like, going to, like, coming home at the end of every day and, like, going to my hotel room and just passing these two doors and just thinking, there, but by the grace of God go I. That. Like on a. Like, I didn't. I don't have to wake up on a Saturday morning and check into DUI school. The ground floor of a. Of a Bonvoy Marriott Courtyard by Marriott Phoenix Mesa. Phoenix Mesa, Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

I've got eyes on it.

[Andrew Walsh]

You got eyes on it. It was a fine place to stay, by the way. Everybody was very, very nice. They're very nice. I was proud of myself for advocating the first day I took a shower there. The water was backed up in the tub, which is a really gross thing to happen in a hotel. I went down, I told him about it. It was fixed by the next day. And I happened to run into, like, a maintenance person, and he somehow recognized me and was like, hey, I fixed that thing in your room. Is it working all right? And I was like, yeah, it's like very, very friendly people there.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm looking at this hotel and honestly, you go three pictures in and you get these conference rooms.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, really?

[Luke Burbank]

And they just scream victim impact panel. Like, I mean, that. That's not to be joked about necessarily. But like the. Yeah. These are either, like, either hard sell timeshare kind of Saturday meeting or some kind of. Yeah. Traffic school that you're being. You're being made to go to by the judge.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. Now I'm picturing Susie B. In there listening to. I know our pitch about timeshares that she just keeps saying, take your time. But I'm not buying.

[Luke Burbank]

Exactly. I just imagine her like Eminem just getting ready for a show, just with, like, headphones on. Just like whatever that song is. Lose yourself.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sure.

[Luke Burbank]

That's just her. That's just her sitting in the Courtyard by Marriott Phoenix Mesa in that room, just being totally impervious to all these people buzzing around her, trying to sell her more condo time. More condo points. By the way. Another thing, too, if we. If we might revisit some offline conversations we were having last week. Cause, you know, there were some people that we know that had asked me how you were doing, and I said, well, it's obviously a really. Must be a really hard, intense time. I go. But I do think he is sort of keeping his chin up. Cause he's sending me pictures of how many Chili's restaurants there are in his immediate region. And it was a shocking number. A shocking number of Chili's.

[Andrew Walsh]

When I am on a trip like this, like, I just sort of like, if it's a work trip or. Or an extended stay like this, where obviously my attention is on more serious matters, I give up on trying to find any, at least on the first night or something. It's like when you're landing in Mesa, you're just like, you know, what I need after a long day of pre bereavement is some sort of a platter from Chili's. Like, that's. And then like, whatever, whatever, like super gulp they pour their beer into at the bar.

[Luke Burbank]

Whatever. Boomba, I think to call it. At Moose McGillicuddies in the gas Lamp district, I am. You can get a boombot of beer.

[Andrew Walsh]

You made every single last syllable of that up.

[Luke Burbank]

What if I told you I went with my friend JJ Tebow to Moose McGillicuddies, where on Tuesday they'd give you a boombop for, like, $4?

[Andrew Walsh]

I'll tell you to stop lying to me, Luke. Those words don't exist. But, yeah. And so I was like, well, there must be a Chili's nearby. And so, like, literally, you can probably picture this, right? Like, I got off the plane, I think, in the afternoon on Monday, went directly to the hospital, spent probably four or five hours there or something, and then came back to my hotel to check in. And there's just something about that feeling, right? Like, all you want is a very basic, clean accommodations, you know? And that's exactly what I will just say that is exactly what Bonvoy offered me. It was exactly what I needed for this particular moment in my life. And you check in and everything is clean and the air conditioning is blasting because you forget, Luke, how hot it is in Arizona. My God, I was so cold on the airplane. So cold in the airport when I arrived. And then I'm like, well, it'll probably be warmer outside. And then you walk outside and it is like somebody just pushed you into an oven, Hansel and Gretel style. I don't know if that happens in there.

[Luke Burbank]

But, like, I think they push her in. They push her trying to cook them, but then they get the last laugh.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm the witch. By the way, I was planning on reading that this afternoon, so thanks for the spoiler on that.

[Luke Burbank]

But it is.

[Andrew Walsh]

You just forget what the heat is like in Arizona. God. So I get back to my hotel on that first night, and I just. You Know that move? You just sit on the edge of the bed, right. You haven't even unpacked anything. You've just thrown your suitcase down, sit on the edge of the bed, and you're just like, okay, what's available? And you just type in Chili's into Google Maps on your phone. And then you wait to see what populates. And my God.

[Luke Burbank]

And, you know, should I go to the Chili's Bar Grill and Bar on Stapley Drive? How about the one on South Power Road? Andrew, how about the one on North Dobson? Oh, I like the one on McKellips Road.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh.

[Luke Burbank]

But I'm actually a fan of the South Signal Butte location. That is so many. Did I double up? No, those are all different chilies.

[Andrew Walsh]

And there's something about seeing them on the map, like.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Now, the thing is, what I realized is if you, if. If I clicked on some of those, the way Mesa, Arizona is laid out as well is things look a little bit closer on the map than they really are. Nothing is walkable. I did my best to walk around there. I still probably, you know, there was a bar I went to once and. And, you know, I'd go get something to eat or what have you. And, you know, I was still doing probably like walking. If anything was a mile or closer, I was still walking there.

[Luke Burbank]

See, that's brave in that, in that heat.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Well, often, probably right at sundown or the sun's starting to go down. So it wasn't too bad. Some, some. Some daytime stuff. I just tried to stay in that mode as much as possible. But one thing, when you look at that map and you're just like, oh, my God, I'm surrounded by chilies. It's almost like it. Almost show title. You feel like when you look at that blue dot and all of these. All of these chilies encroaching on you, you feel like there's sharks coming at you while you're floating in the ocean. But if you actually zoom in a bit, you realize that some of these are 15, 20 miles away. It's just on a. Basically a highway or some sort of a large through fair. Right. Like some sort of.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't think I even mentioned the Chili's that's in Superstition Springs.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah. Superstition is an area around there, too. But I'll make that the show pick. It was just so funny. I'm just like, well, hopefully there's a Chili's nearby. And I call it up and I'm like, oh, my God, we have it was almost like the fly issue that I had in my basement a couple of weeks ago. We have too many chilies. I got to put up some sticky tape to collect some of these chilies.

[Luke Burbank]

Have you been dealing with a fruit fly situation in your kitchen the way I have? Not the one that you talked about with the infestation in the basement, but just kind of around your sink or if there's any fruit that's out or anything? Are you having any issues with that currently?

[Andrew Walsh]

It's funny because you live in my head on this issue because we have a little compost bin sitting next to our kitchen sink. And what I usually do is we put compost in there and either goes directly out to the city compost, or we have one of those loamy machines that turns into that earth stuff. And usually that thing, you know, I keep it pretty meticulous. I have a, you know, kind of a compostable liner in there, and I keep it very clean. But I remember on the show one time, a long time ago, you said something like, well, anybody who has one of those has fruit flies. And I remember I got very defensive. I was like, no, I do not have fruit flies. You're like, I'm sure you don't know, whatever. But I'm just. I. It's like the idea of somebody coming into my house and having to deal with pestilence is, as you would guess, like, pretty high in my list of. Of things that cause me stress. So often when I'm that thing, I'm like, no fruit flies. We're clean here. I don't want to be that house that Luke described. But for the past couple of weeks, it has been a struggle. I have this little. I have this little solution that literally, it's like a liquid solution of mostly vinegar that I bought called, like, it's so and so's bug juice or something on Grove. And you just pop the lid on that, and I set it next.

[Luke Burbank]

I have the same kind.

[Andrew Walsh]

You got that same. It works pretty well, right? Well.

[Luke Burbank]

So I couldn't tell if we've reached some sort of singularity where, like, almost in, like, remember that Amazing Stories, the Steven Spielberg series, where I've talked about this weirdly a lot on the show, but there was an episode maybe. Was it called Amazing Stories or Amazing Tales?

[Andrew Walsh]

I think it was Amazing Stories I download. I have all of them if you want me to send them to you.

[Luke Burbank]

Where the guy has to draw the wheels onto the plane.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes, famous. That. Isn't that funny how that lives so Large in our minds.

[Luke Burbank]

I know. Like, that's crazy. I don't even remember seeing that as a kid. I don't remember when and where I saw it, but it's always stuck in my head. But like, I just remember seeing some ad on Tick Tock that it's like, do you have fruit flies? And I was like, I absolutely don't have fruit flies. And then I walked into the kitchen and there was a thousand fruit flies. Like Tick Tock had jumped over some digital brick and mortar divide and was now like, it almost seems like something out of a black mirror where like, yeah, somebody saying something online and now it's just happening in your real life.

[Andrew Walsh]

Almost like, okay, so everybody has these theories that like, oh, our phones are listening to us, right? And that's how they're getting us these targeted ads that seem like bizarre. I mentioned a tricycle to my brother in law over coffee at a diner and now I'm getting tricycle ads. How is this happening? You know, and there are some theories about that, but it does seem very black mirrorish to take that and say, no, we're gonna introduce the problem into your house as we serve you these ads.

[Luke Burbank]

That's what it felt like because I had not noticed one fruit fly. I'm talking gnats here. Those little ones, you can't. It's like you don't even see them until you've disturbed them.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, until they move.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, till they move. And so like I started seeing those ads and then all of a sudden I had these, these gnats. And I'm pretty meticulous here as well. I don't have a composter. What I try to do is I put a lot of food or food stuff through like the garbage disposal or I'll take it out. And I do have like a little pile in the yard that I guess is a sort of unregulated compost pile where I'll put stuff and let it kind of decompose.

[Andrew Walsh]

You put food there too. Or it's mostly like brush and stuff.

[Luke Burbank]

I will put like banana peels and stuff like that. I wouldn't put. I'm trying, but, but like I'm not rotating it. I'm not using. I'm not trying to make something out of it. It's just kind of like if I don't feel like having a, you know, a bunch of kind of moldy fruit in my garbage and also I don't want to feed it down through the garbage disposal, what I will do is I'll Take it out and I'll put it in this part of my yard that's kind of not near anything and sort of piles up and then, I guess, rots or whatever.

[Andrew Walsh]

All that is to say you might actually get some good stuff out of that at some point.

[Luke Burbank]

But, like, I'm very, like. I don't like. I don't like dirty dishes in the sink.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't like food that's out.

[Luke Burbank]

So I'm. I have to say, I'm running a pretty tight ship there. And yet these things have been absolutely bedeviling me to where I bought a couple of those. I think I might have bought a different brand, but I'm sure it's exactly the same thing. It's a little white canister. It's got a half of the lid pops open, and it's got little holes in it. And I assume it just has apple cider vinegar or something in it. And the fruit flies are supposed to fly in there and get trapped and die. And that might be happening. I don't know. But then there's still enough of them that are, like, managing to avoid the trap that there's still some of them in the kitchen. Then I have this blue light thing that's, like, sticky on one side, and it shines a blue light on that. They're supposed to, like. I've had that in my kitchen for years now.

[Andrew Walsh]

You told me about that, I think, you know, a couple of weeks ago in the show, and I think I just saw an ad for that for the first time yesterday, maybe during the football game. Is it this. Does it start with a V, the brand name?

[Luke Burbank]

No, this one is. I think it's. Believe it or not, I want to say, literally, the name is home. Very general name for something like that. But. But, you know, yeah, it's. It's. It's crazy because I have been. And there is no. I don't have any fruit, actually. I look like a. I look like a real Howard Hughes now because I have, like. I have a couple apples and a pear that are in the fruit bowl that's usually sitting out, but I have them in a large Ziploc bag right now because I don't want the fly. I don't want the fruit flies to be attracted to them. So I'm glad to hear that. It's not just me. I do think it's seasonal. And I think my theory is the reason that they start blasting you with TikTok ads is because somebody has taken five minutes to research what is the time of year when this tends to happen. And by the way, it worked. I didn't buy a thing off of TikTok because I don't know how long that would take, et cetera, but they were pitching their product to the right person and that I was also experiencing a fruit fly issue.

[Andrew Walsh]

Hey, while we're talking about TikTok, can I ask you about a story that I only read the headline of at some point, maybe over the weekend or maybe late last week. And again, I'm coming in here a little bit scattered and maybe I'll use the bereavement excuse as much as possible until I have to start.

[Luke Burbank]

I think that's reasonable.

[Andrew Walsh]

Until I have to start answering for the same unprofessional behavior I've been doing for like 10 years now. But I think I saw a headline that said part of like TikTok going forward is going to be that the administration, the Trump administration is going to somehow be in charge of the algorithm. Is this true or did I just read a misleading headline that was made to concern me?

[Luke Burbank]

What I have seen is not that the administration will be in charge of the algorithm, but that the administration has strong, has bullied, I guess, ByteDance into potentially selling TikTok to a bunch of Trump friendly tech people, including I think a guy named, well, you know what, I don't want to shoot from the hip. I think I saw the name Marc Andreessen, but I always forget if Marc Andreessen, which side of this he's on, if he's one of the, you know, Peter Thiel tech bros. Or I don't want to besmirch him, if he's. Sure, if he's not one of the Trump guys. But basically what I was seeing is that there is, there appears to be a move to force the sale of TikTok to a bunch of Trump loyalists, which would just mean that's another. And for me, sadly, maybe where I'm getting most of my information these days, that's another source of information that would be under the thumb of this administration as they are rapidly rolling up other networks and broadcast companies.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I mean, that's the other thing about this trip. I was on it. I know the world always feels like it's burning or it has felt that way for the past six to nine months or whatever it's been. But it does seem like these attacks on speech, from the Kimmel thing to this, to just everything that has happened in the past seven days since I've talked to you, it's just the Drumbeat is getting so much louder and scarier and it's all happening in the backdrop while I'm in Arizona and bumping into people, by the way, running into some really wonderful people in Arizona too. I took lifts everywhere, had some really great conversations with people. Politics is not necessarily front and foremost on everybody's mind and just got to meet. So I don't want to make it sound like everybody in Arizona is waving a Trump flag or something or anxious to even have those conversations. But there is something about being in Arizona, which is in Mesa, Arizona is very different than Seattle, Washington, as far as, let's say, Vibe is concerned. And just every room you walk in, it's just like Fox News is the norm. That is not biased, that is just the way people are getting their information there. And you realize how hopeless things can sort of seem when the media landscape is what it is.

[Luke Burbank]

Having said it is Marc Andreessen, by the way, and Larry Ellison of Oracle, whose son is the Skydance person. So his son, Larry Ellison's son, who's also right leaning, is now my boss's boss's boss at CBS Paramount. Skydance. By the way, I logged in, I was doing some kind of a paperwork thing. I was doing something with CBS the other day where I needed to get some old forms. And first of all, I mean, trying to deal with the HR there. Like we don't have an HR person, the direct link at Sunday Morning, at least that I know of. So you have to go into the just like absolutely Brazil esque world of Skydance, Paramount, cbs, blah blah blah, hr, da da da da. Like I was getting these emails from these bots. I'd have to assume they were bots. But. But it was weird because I was logging in and it was like Skydance and this little animated thing does a dance and I was like, oh, this feels so surreal.

[Andrew Walsh]

That sounds so much like a I think you should leave sketch. Was it an egg eating other eggs?

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know. I've never gotten this far before.

[Andrew Walsh]

So I realized I was sort of kind of spinning out of control there, thinking about the world. But I guess here was my follow up question about the TikTok situation. You mentioned that it's probably going to, you know, affect your usage of the app. But I'm interested in knowing if it's going to affect people's usage of the app. Not because people want to make a statement of, oh, I don't want to engage with this thing. Like, in other words, I was on Instagram, but when Mark Zuckerberg, like, was very, very quick to jump on the MAGA boat. I was like, I don't want to associate with the. It was a. It was like a determination I made. Like, I don't dislike the product anymore today than I did the day before. Although I do think that Instagram has gotten worse. But it wasn't like, I'm not that into this anymore. I'm going to stop using it. It was like, I don't want anything to do with these A holes anymore. Right. With TikTok, I'm wondering if they're messing around or, like, kind of holding the reins tight. If MAGA people are holding the reins tight on TikTok, yes. You'll have some people who will say, I don't want to engage with that anymore on principle. But also, is it kind of a given that it's just going to be a less interesting place for people? Will it just sort of end up sort of dying? Not even on principle, but just because it's going to suck?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, you know, maybe a little bit. Like what happened with Twitter, although I'm actually surprised at how I'm, you know, I guess it's called X now. I'm surprised at how many people. And I don't mean this with any judgment because I kind of, you know, hit the eject button on Twitter because I thought it was gonna get less good with Elon Musk being the loudest voice on there and having control of all of it. I just thought my experience would actually be kind of diminished, which helped me not, you know, feel sad about, which is different, like you said, than you and Instagram. You liked Instagram. You just didn't like the people behind it or person behind it. I thought that Twitter was also just going to get worse. It was just going to be a louder, angrier place that I didn't really want to be. And, I mean, obviously Elon Musk gets in there and he does all this crazy stuff where he's just laying so many people off and it's like, what is he even doing with this? And I guess I kind of figured, well, Twitter is going to just shrink and shrink and shrink and go away, but it's still happening over there. And most people I know, certainly people that work in our industry and people that write books and. And basically social media is an important part of their brand, if you will, or what they do, they're all on Twitter still, most of them. So I guess I don't know if that's an answer to the question about TikTok I guess I wonder how bad it would have to get before it drives people away. I mean, certainly if I was looking at it and I was starting to get way more MAGA stuff then usually what happens right now is the algorithm has me figured out. So if I get someone being maga, it's because the clip is gonna stop and some other person is gonna appear and make fun of that person who was being maga.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right?

[Luke Burbank]

Then every once in a while it's like, where's the person? Where's the guy Tizzy with the beard? There's some guy, I don't follow him, but I get all this stuff. He's this interesting looking guy. His whole, his whole niche. There's. There's a couple of guys, there's a guy named Dinesh on there and then this guy Tizzy and they're just sort of the, like, I guess I don't know what they are. They're like their whole niche of TikTok is. And probably they're on everything else. I just see them on TikTok is someone is being racist somewhere and being mean and someone filmed it on their phone. And now these people have such large platforms that if they put that person's face on there, they're like, mesa, find this person. He's been at four Chili's today. He's on his way to a fifth Mesa, who is this? And I mean they're careful. They don't want people getting doxed. They're never pushing for anyone to do anything violent towards anyone. What they're usually basically want to do is like someone, there was a road raid incident and some guy, typically a white guy, rolled down his window and yelled a bunch of, of crazy racist stuff at somebody who maybe was non white and was filming with their camera. And the, these guys sort of position in the culture is to say like, hey, who is this? Find this person. And they figure out pretty quick he's a real estate agent. And then they put his real estate agent ad up and then he gets fired from his company. Usually what happens. But anyway, those guys, what my point is just that usually when I see somebody acting up in a, in a post on TikTok, it's because one of those guys is about to jump in and say something. Now if, if I get more posts where it's just the people being crazy or Maggie or whatever, that might tell me that Larry Ellison's got his thumb on the scale and that might cause me to listen. Anything that caused me to look at TikTok less Is a good thing.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

For my emotional well being, you know. You know what was pretty good for my emotional well being this weekend, Andrew? Sports, as in mostly the Seattle Mariners, but just about every thing that could have. In fact, I don't think I've ever had a clean sweep weekend like this as a sports fan. Every single team that I root for, one, the Huskies, won the Apple cup, which I didn't even really watch because to me the Apple cup at this point is like the whole conference is fractured and it does not like it used to be. But still I'd rather they win than.

[Andrew Walsh]

Not win a classic September Apple Cup.

[Luke Burbank]

That's exactly right. God, the. Of course the Mariners and we can talk about it a little bit. The Mariners had a series in Houston that I don't. I mean other than maybe the playoff series against the New York Yankees in 1995 when we managed. That was when Edgar Martinez got that hit in the kingdome that, that scored Ken Griffey Jr. And I want to say Vince Coleman to, to win, to take us to the next round, maybe that series, probably that series. But other than that, I don't think I've ever had a series of Mariners baseball that I watched more closely or was more excited about. The Seahawks won in a laugher on Sunday. Even down to Andrew. Yesterday, before the Seahawks game started, the LA Rams had gone into the Philadelphia Eagles home field. The defending super bowl champ Philadelphia Eagles and the LA Rams who are in our division, we want them to lose as many games as possible. They were absolutely throttling the Eagles. It was like 26 to 3 or something at the half. It was, it was like crazy. And I went on my jog and I thought as the second half was starting and I was, wouldn't it be amazing if when I get done with this jog, somehow the Eagles have roared back and I get back in the car and there's 30 seconds left in the game and the Eagles are winning 27 to 26.

[Andrew Walsh]

Really, I didn't follow that at all.

[Luke Burbank]

So they had, and they had managed to hang onto this lead by blocking a field goal previously that the LA Rams were kicking. So now it's a 41 yarder for the LA Rams and it is, you know, a very makeable kick in this, in this era of the NFL. And again, I want the Rams to lose. And also I like the Eagles because of my Philly family. And the Eagles block their second, the second field goal in a row. They block the Rams field goal and win the game. It was that Kind of by one point. So it's like, even these little. Like, it's these. It felt like I was in a casino and every machine I touched was spitting out a jackpot or something.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like, I'm surprised you didn't run to the casino. Or maybe you did.

[Luke Burbank]

Tempting.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I stayed. I stayed at home. You know what I did that I'm especially proud of yesterday, Andrew, and you'll enjoy this. I did something that I never thought that I would be able to do successfully, which is I downloaded a printer driver to my computer to make my printer work.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wow. And this was like some. This is some maintenance stuff. This isn't like, I got a new printer, and I'm following.

[Luke Burbank]

I got a new printer.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, you did get the new printer. And you just followed the instructions?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, kind of, but it was not easy. Like, it's the same printer I used to have. It's just the newer version and the old one, the previous one, you just. You put it on the. You know, you go on the keypad, and you find the WI fi and you punch in the thing, and then it shows up on the computer because it's all on the same network, and then you just start printing. This, for some reason, was a whole other thing where it was telling me that my computer didn't have the right driver to run this new printer. So I had to go and find the drivers for this brother printer and then download it so that I could get the printer up and working. And now it's up and working. But I just thought of you in the way that I live in your head. Every time you see a fruit fly in your house, you live in my head. Anytime I see the word driver, update a driver.

[Andrew Walsh]

Did you say driver? Oh, brother driver, where art thou? Did you say that money went on your heart?

[Luke Burbank]

I whispered it quietly to myself. But I did think you would have been proud of me, because that's usually where I just buy a third printer. That's usually where I just go, well, this printer's also broken. Let me get this one. Needs a driver. But no. The Mariners series with. Maybe without getting too bogged down in baseball stuff, or as we say, X's and O's. It was the Saturday game, which ended with an un. Truly unbelievable catch by a guy named Victor Robles for the Mariners. The Mariners were.

[Andrew Walsh]

I know him because he has a special house for his monkeys. As we talked about.

[Luke Burbank]

That's who he is.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

That's. I forgot. That was robless.

[Andrew Walsh]

We got to play that tape. I'll Look, I love.

[Luke Burbank]

I love that tape so much. So basically, the. For people that don't follow baseball or care about it, just think about it in terms of, like, I don't know, Star wars or something or whatever. Some sort of a. Like, basically the. For the last. For seven out of the last eight seasons, the Houston Astros baseball team has won the division that we are in. They have been dominant. And the few times when the Mariners have managed to even sort of, like, you know, like, get close or have a chance or maybe meet up with them in the postseason, there always seems to be some hellacious moment where we are playing, always at their field, and whatever the worst possible thing I could envision happening happens. And I'm left to just sit there, broken emotionally, because it's almost as if I manifest these bad outcomes by thinking, like, okay, what would happen if Jordan Alvarez came up with. What would happen if. If Pena came up with the bases loaded and then hit a home run to the Crawford boxes? You know? And so on Saturday night, well, first of all, we'd gone out boating with our friends on the Columbia River. It was so much fun. I was a little. I was a little. On Friday's show, I was wondering if I really wanted to be out on a boat on the Columbia river on what I thought might be kind of a blustery day. It ended up being amazing, but we were socializing, and so I wasn't, like, home watching that baseball game, but I did have it on my phone on Fubo, and we ended up getting dinner at the McMinimans down in Kalama Harbor. And, like, I had the phone propped up. I was trying to be discreet about it. I didn't have any volume going. I was trying to be engaged in the conversation. But I was also, like, I did want to see what was happening in this game. And what basically happened was we got to the ninth inning. The Mariners had looked really good at the beginning, but then had given up this grand slam home run and were in the midst of what felt to me like a classic meltdown.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Can I give a little bit of context for this, please? Because, I mean, I think you said this. This was an incredibly important series. We don't have to get into exactly why. I think listeners who follow this at all know why. Even if you're just a casual resident of Seattle, the Seattle Times was sending out, you know, updates push notific during the game when certain things were happening. This is an incredibly important series if we're going to end up making it to the postseason. But as you mentioned before, Luke, the Astros have a way of absolutely crushing our dreams. Like on Saturday, even though we were up at one point by six runs and pretty late in the game, I kept saying, you can't score enough on this team. You can't score enough on this team. Because I believe it was game one of the playoffs. The last time we were in the playoffs that the Astros overcame, I think a seven. I think we had a seven run lead on them, and then we ended up losing in the, in the final inning. Right. And that was the one where I, I was just so. I mean, that's probably the worst sports moment of my life, with the possible exception of that, of that, of that super bowl that we won't talk about here. You know, it was just absolutely devastating. And, and I think that the Astros have a way of doing this, and they have a way of doing it to us. So even on Saturday, when we had a six run lead, it was easy to kind of think that it was in hand. But you're like, no, it's never in hand. And then who was it again? Was it Pena? That grand slam? And then suddenly, oh, here we are late in the game and we're only winning by two runs all of a sudden. And two runs can mean almost nothing when you're talking about us playing the Astros. They are there to make us miserable.

[Luke Burbank]

And like, we were at the restaurant, but we hadn't been seated yet. And I was actually walking to the restroom and I had this, you know, the game on my phone, and I'm looking at it, and I walk in and I balance my atop the urinal, and I'm just looking at it and like, Pena's up. This is when the bases are loaded. We're ahead 6, 0 at this point, but I'm like, just. The only bad outcome here is a grand slam. The only bad outcome. Give him base hit, give up a couple runs. We have six runs. The only thing you can't do is let this guy get a grand slam on us. And then as I'm finishing up at the urinal, I just observe the grand slam and I'm just like, like, you gotta be kidding me. It was just like, again, I felt like I was somehow manifesting this stuff by even daring think about the worst case scenario which then somehow creates it. So we get to the ninth inning.

[Andrew Walsh]

Daddy, why is that man crying into the urinal?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, exactly. And so then the we. We get. It's the bottom of the ninth inning, Houston is up. And again, this game just has all of the earmarks. It has all of the indications of just being a classic Mariners disaster, like another one that we'll talk about for years. And I'm going into a whole. I said I was going to talk X's and O's, but I will for a moment, which is, we won the first game in Houston, we're way up in the second game, and if we take two out of three, that positions us incredibly well. That. That just getting two out of three games in Houston is kind of like putting us on the road to probably winning the division. And yet if Houston comes back and wins that second game, then they win on Sunday. Now we've lost two out of three, and now we are the ones that are in, you know, a much more tough situation. And when that grand slam happened, and then when they get two guys on in the ninth inning, so they're still down by two runs, they get two guys on, and I'm just watching everything that I thought was, like, basically going to happen. Like, I was so excited about where we were at, just evaporating in front of my very eyes. And Carlos Correa comes up for Houston, a guy who's been tough on the Mariners over the years. It's also weird with Houston how it's just, like, it's rarely someone new. It's either Altuve, it's either Pena, it's either Jordan Alvarez or somebody like Carlos Correa. It's just. It's like. Seems like there's this rogues gallery of dudes that always break my heart, that play for Houston. And then Correa hits this flare, and I'm, again, now we're at dinner. We're sitting at the table. I have my phone propped up on, like, a salt shake, and, like, again, no sound. And I just see out of nowhere, a diving figure emerge in the outfield, and it's Victor Robles diving to catch this ball. And I still don't really understand what's happening. Like, did he catch it? Did he trap it? He's running to second, but a guy's also scoring. And then I see Josh Naylor just doing, like, he's basically doing a version of. Remember that famous thing that Felix Hernandez did that was, like, his celebration that then they kind of memeified into being like, where the wild things are. Yep, Josh Naylor just did a Where the wild things are. And I was like, well, if Josh Naylor is happy, I know. I know it's going to be fine, because that man's never wrong. Like, so Josh Naylor Josh Naylor's body language says it's going to be okay. So it's going to be okay. And I was trying so hard to explain to everyone else at the table who folks who couldn't have given less of a care about that game. Very lovely people, but they just don't care about the Mariners. I was like, I can't explain to you what just happened, but something incredible just happened. Something that is maybe in the top five Mariner plays of my lifetime just happened here.

[Andrew Walsh]

And it's the type of thing that would usually go against us. It's exactly the thing that would usually fell us because not only did Robles become like Superman, I don't know if you've seen all of the image. People have put capes on him. Like he's. He flies in.

[Luke Burbank]

He's flying in the air.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. He and Julio are flying in from different directions. You don't know what's going to happen. It seems like it's going to be a disaster. But there's only one out at this point and there's a base run. Or was it Meyer or Myers? I think I don't know that player very well for the Astros. And he's like running home. He doesn't realize that that was a catch. He thinks that that's just going to fall and that he's going to score a run. And it was actually like kind of a base running folly for him not to run back to his base. They could have had another out to get, but Robles had the presence of mind to do this incredibly athletic thing, but then to get up and just sort of jog the second base and I think just gently toss it to J.P. right? And suddenly end of game. And I think that's when Myers realized that he was out.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I mean, it was. You're exactly right. It was the kind of thing that always happens to us in the negative and leaves me just feeling like I was imagining, like if that ball drops and then like, you know, they end up tying the game and then they end up winning it. And I'm just like sitting there at McMenamins just with like. Again, I'm trying to maintain, you know, for me, trying to maintain a polite conversation at that point is like me, you know, I'm. This is probably not. It's not an appropriate comparison, but I'm like George Bush when he's reading that book and they tell him about 9, 11. He tries to go back to acting cash like, it's my 9, 11. If. If they come back and win that game. And then I'm just like, I'm socially hanging out with people who. Who are unfazed by what just happened on my little phone, you know, like. So I came home after we got done with the hangout, and I told you this on text, and I was telling the criminals this. First of all, I rewatched the. I watched the game on my TV because it was recorded on Fubo. I mean, I watched like the last three innings. The important part. I then started just on my phone looking at, like, sort of compressed versions of the game. So I watched the whole. Every out in the game, basically the whole game, but sped up in five minutes. Then I watched the same thing with the Houston Astros announcers. I mean, this was. This was demented stuff I was doing on Saturday night. Like, I kept just watching the catch over and over again. I couldn't get enough. I couldn't watch it enough. I couldn't watch the game enough. Then I was seeing, like, Houston fans on TikTok, you know, pulling their hair out, which was obviously making me feel pretty good. Like I could not. I could not consume and reconsume this moment enough to feel satisfied.

[Andrew Walsh]

Are you familiar with the cobra stance? No. I don't know if this is something that Danny o' Neil made up or if it's just something that he writes about. I think it's a real phenomenon that I learned about through Danny Oneills newsletter. He, of course, former colleague and friend of yours and mine, I guess, but you guys cut your teeth at the UW newspaper together covering sports. And he's got this great newsletter now that I subscribe to, and he sometimes writes about the. I think it's called the cobra stance. Maybe Google this and tell me if I'm right about this, Luke. But it's the thing that you've been seeing fans in despair do for years and years and years, and you never really thought about it, but it's when they put their hands or when we. Because usually it's. We put our hands on top of our head so that our elbows are pointed out, kind of make like a cobra, and you end up looking like a cobra, only your hands are on top of your head, elbows pointed directly out, and your face is just miserable, just misery. But because of the shape that your arms are making, you're a cobra.

[Luke Burbank]

I know this. I've cobra'd so many times.

[Andrew Walsh]

Two cobras bra ing it up.

[Luke Burbank]

The longest running cobra of the show.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Is it called the cobra stance? It's something like that. That's amazing in any way. Just seeing. Oh, it's the surrender cobra, is what I said.

[Luke Burbank]

The surrender cobra.

[Andrew Walsh]

Surrender cobra. So many shots of college students at college games, watching their team suddenly lose a lead to go on to lose or whatever. It's such an amazing phenomenon that you've seen a million times.

[Luke Burbank]

I was so, I guess, I mean, I was optimistic on Friday. David and I were saying that we just kind of thought. I mean, David was really strong. He's like, I just have a feeling the Mariners are going to really do well this weekend. And I wanted to believe that, but I was afraid to have my heart broken again. But here we sit on Monday. So they ended up winning all three games again. The Seahawks won, the Huskies won. Like, I've never had a weekend like that where every single sports outcome that I was hoping for. And again, it's not. We're not talking about the Super Bowl. We're not talking about the World Series. These are not even, these weren't even the playoffs. People cast at the table at McMinimans on Saturday, people kept asking me, is it the playoffs? I'm like, no, but it's like the playoffs.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's basically the playoffs. I mean, listen to me, it's the playoffs. I've only been a Mariners fan for 15 years now, or something like that. Yeah, I actually, you know what, that does sound like a long time, now that I put it that way. But, you know, I haven't been a Mariners fan my whole life, so I haven't gone through it the way you and a lot of our friends have for so long. But only having one taste of the playoffs and us just really squeaking in. And again, I will take that. And it was a one. I think that was the 2022 season. And it was, it was wonderful. But we squeaked in on a wild card situation and then we're bumped immediately. And listen, I've been hurt so many times before, sports wise. I'm not counting any chickens until they're hatched. But we are right now, I don't even want to say it. We're in good. We're in good shape. And there is still a chance, a very good chance and a better chance than three days ago that we will actually win the division and possibly get the seating situation, too, that we don't have to get into. But the. I, I think I convinced myself that I was never going to see the Mariners win the division. Like, for whatever. Like for whatever reason, for Mariners reasons and my lifestyle reasons. Who knows how many years I have in me, and who knows how many years the Mariners have in them, how many losses they have in them. And again, there's still a few games to go, and we need to make sure that we don't look past those games. We, as the players, need to win those games. And again, nothing is lost.

[Luke Burbank]

I consider our contribution as important as the player.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. But I have been sort of fantasizing for the past, I don't know, three weeks or so, like, like, what will happen to me if we win the division. Like, again, I want them to go far into the playoffs as well. I want to see. Obviously, I want to see them play a World Series. I want to see them win a World Series. But honestly, emotionally, I don't even know if I can take it if they win the division. The idea of raising the pennant out there or the banner out there in center field and, like, knowing that this was. And again, to know that this was a season that I watched or followed practically every single game. You're there for the entire ride.

[Luke Burbank]

I gave up on this team at least four times.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, my. There were some low, low lows, you know, and also, this is something I think I've told you via text before, and I just need to clear the air here with the listeners on this. Something very weird has happened to me because I have a new favorite Mariner, and he is my favorite Mariner so far and beyond any other Mariner, I'm trying to think of a Mariner who I've ever loved or have been this obsessed with. And he's only been with our team for about two and a half months, and that is Josh Nails Naylor. And the Mariners need to resign him. No matter what happens, they need to resign him because I can't say my favorite Mariner of all time only played for us for three months. You know what I mean?

[Luke Burbank]

Wouldn't that just be like a beautiful dream, Daddy? Tell us the story of Josh Naylor again.

[Andrew Walsh]

People will always think of him first as a Cleveland guardian, although I don't know if he played played for them when their names were the guardians. But, you know, people will always associate him first with Cleveland, right? He was a Cleveland guy. And I don't think that any career with the Mariners will surpass that.

[Luke Burbank]

But, oh, I think he's playing. I think he is having the season of his life. I think not only are we in love with Josh Naylor, I think Josh Naylor's in love with being a Mariner.

[Andrew Walsh]

I really hope so. And I want to see him here forever. Because I can't. Like, I've never been tempted to get a jersey before. You know, like, I'm trying to think who was.

[Luke Burbank]

You have to untuck it immediately upon any win and then realize the jersey goes to his knees. So let me just for the listeners who don't know, there's a guy that we have now named Josh Naylor and he is a fascinating case. He's a first baseman. He is not very tall. He is, he's. He's definitely a kind of a portly fellow. And he does not close too big.

[Andrew Walsh]

Which is a huge. Which I associate with, with he tucks.

[Luke Burbank]

But you know, they have to tuck their jerseys in. Right. But the second the nanosecond the game's over, particularly if we win, and maybe only when we win, he immediately untucks his jersey and you realize that the jersey goes to his knees.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. He's wearing.

[Luke Burbank]

Making him look more like a cartoon character, troll or something.

[Andrew Walsh]

He.

[Luke Burbank]

When he joined the team, we picked him up mid season and when he joined the team, he was, was. I don't think he smiled for the first week.

[Andrew Walsh]

No.

[Luke Burbank]

And in fact, people, the announcers, everybody was like. Because the thing with the Seattle Mariners is we, we've always got a bunch of really awesome dudes on the team who constantly screw up. It's like, could. It's like, I'll take a. I'll take a little less personality and a little more productivity. And he was the opposite. He just was just like scowling all the time. And the announcers were like, he's a very serious guy. And I think they were. They tried to do a couple post game interviews with him, but he was really pretty, pretty, pretty taciturn. And what I feel like I've watched is as he's gotten comfortable and as this town has embraced him and as he has embraced being part of this magical run. Like, I think he is also loosening up a little bit and like, see like the way he celebrates now. Like, he didn't. So when a Mariner hits a home run, they, they give him this dumb trident that I think they bought on. On Amazon. Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Did you hear the national announcers yesterday? Like, that story has now evolved. They say now it's an official movie prop from Aquaman. What if they've replaced. I think that. I think the national announcers were reading a rumor online because I remember when they first got that thing, it was hilarious. I think it was. It wasn't. It was Canzone who was like, yeah, we just bought it on Amazon. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

And this is a thing that all teams have now. Like, each baseball team will have their celebratory totem. They're, they're, they're item that, like, you hit a home run, then somebody hands it to you, and then you, like, run around the dugout with it, or you go up with the fans and go, hey, look at me and the Mariners. Because that their. Their logo is that, you know, Trit. Is it. It's a trident or a trident? Trident, yeah. I think I get confused because I think that the Ariel's dad is King Triton. Oh, okay. In the Little Mermaid, and I think I always get Triton and trident. Anyway, the Mariners have this trident and when you hit a home run, most of the players are so excited. They hit a home run, they run back to the dugout and someone hands them the trident and then they like, hold the trident up and everyone cheers. And I feel like Naylor didn't even really want to hold the trident.

[Andrew Walsh]

No. The first time that somebody handed it to him, he handed it back. And I don't. The thing about it is I never took that as a bad attitude on his part. I just think that he doesn't waste words. Like, even in the post game press conferences early on, I'm like, well, he's just. He's like, efficient in everything. He's a baseball savant.

[Luke Burbank]

The.

[Andrew Walsh]

The New York Times wrote this piece. I think that you read it as well, Luke. Yeah. About how he's so smart, he steals all these bases, but he's one of the slowest players and one of the.

[Luke Burbank]

He's in the top 15 slowest players in Major League Baseball.

[Andrew Walsh]

But he's got.

[Luke Burbank]

Who have had as many, like, attempts as he has.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. And successful attempts at stealing bases. Because he's just like super, super smart about the game. His. When he's at the plate. Like, I missed his weird bunt yesterday.

[Luke Burbank]

But, like, he's just phenomenal.

[Andrew Walsh]

He brings so much intelligence to him.

[Luke Burbank]

It.

[Andrew Walsh]

And I just, I am so deeply in love with him. Like, every time the c. You ever. He does this thing where he's always just wincing at nothing. He does this wincing at nothing that I, I associate with him so much.

[Luke Burbank]

Except for the squinting.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. He's always squinting and he's always looking in the middle distance. You ever notice that he'll just be.

[Luke Burbank]

Like some eye black or the lights bothering you.

[Andrew Walsh]

He's just like. Whether he's playing defense or at the plate, he's just sort of like. He'll take a moment and just kind of squint and just lock his eyes somewhere far in the distance for a while. I don't know if you watched that video I sent you from probably like five years ago or something, when he was still playing with Cleveland. And John Boy Media did that thing where they, like, read his lips and he was, like, furious at these fans. They were on a road trip somewhere. I can't remember where it might have been. Boston, although that doesn't sound right. And fans were sort of harassing him. But then he ends up twice becoming the hero of this game and this major comeback that was just devastating. And he just keeps screaming. And of course, John Boy does that thing where if you don't have the microphone on and John Boy will, like, read the lips and. And he just keeps saying, they fed me, they fed me. And then, like. And he's, like, looking at the fans, he's like, you fed me. And like, it doesn't even make sense. That's right up there with you.

[Luke Burbank]

Bleed for me.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's. It is. It is so much like that he, like, slams his helmet down and it bounces and then lands for a moment, actually in the cubby hole it belongs in before bouncing back out. It was. I mean, it's an incredible video. And I've watched it, I don't know, like, a hundred times maybe. I am just so deeply in love with this. Just be a rental. He has to be a Mariner going forward for, like, a significant period of time because I'm just too deeply in love with him.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, all this is to say I now that things. Yeah, now that things have miraculously sort of gone the Mariners way and that we. We went on that winning streak, then we went into Houston tied, and then we actually swept them. And. And if we were able to just, you know, do the bare minimum going forward and we win the division, we. I mean, again, at no time in my probably adult life have I considered the idea of the Mariners playing in the World Series, believe it or not. And this has to do with, like you said, some, to my mind, a lot about baseball. Like, in other words, the rich just get richer. You have these big market teams that have these huge budgets, and they are, you know, the Yankees and the Red Sox and the Dodgers. And it feels to me, even though there's some evidence since to the contrary, you know, occasionally normal teams win it, but it just feels like if you're. If you're not one of those. If you're not one of those fan bases that is with either the Red Sox, the Yankees, or the Dodgers, you are mostly not going to be ever going to the World Series. In fact, you may never. I mean, they've never been to the World Series in my lifetime, and I've been watching them since. I mean, I've been actively watching them since probably 1984, probably since I was, like, 8 years old. I've tried to watch or listen to almost every single game of every Mariner season, and they've never been to the World Series. And I didn't even think it. It didn't even enter my mind. It was a possibility. And now I'm. I'm confronted with this idea of, like, what this fall might look like, what the next few months of our life might look like if they get to the postseason and they're actually playing well and they actually, like, are in the World Series, which they've never been before. And if they did win a World Series, I'm not saying it would make up for the politics of this country, but it would be something that I would need.

[Andrew Walsh]

Be careful. This is how. This is the.

[Luke Burbank]

This is how the first one. This is. Yeah. We have Chris Hayes to blame.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes, exactly. For the first.

[Luke Burbank]

I believe he traded the 2016 election for a Cubs.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

For a Cubs World Series. And, well, we know how that ended. But, like, I mean, honestly, like, I guess I'm just saying, I. It's only even maybe, as you and I are having this conversation, that I'm. That I'm, like, allowing myself to consider the idea that the Mariners might make a deep run in the post season and that there just might be a lot of really fun, exciting baseball moments down the line for us here as fans, which I'm excited about. And also, it's long overdue. Like, you know, 50 years for a franchise is enough time to have never been to the World Series.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's so funny to compare our collective attitudes towards this. I'm going to narrow this down to the way you, you, me, and our friend Ders are able to sort of digest these kinds of situations. So Ders is always the worst case scenario guy, right? We talk about that on the show all the time. You've blocked him on the text chinks. You can't handle the negativity. It can be like the first game in April and somebody gets thrown out for some sort of boneheaded attempt at stealing second, and he'll just be like, well, that's the. That's the season right there. We're done. Screw it. You can't lose these games this, this early. I remember him yelling at me about a, like, via text because I was happy about a very high scoring, very interesting game that we played against. I can't remember who. And then we ended up losing it after like five hours of baseball or something. But it was an interesting game and I was like, I just enjoyed the game. And he's like, you can't afford to lose those. You should be miserable right now.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, just so you know, Dirge is really coming in for it on this show. Show Friday. David laid out why he's probably blocking dirt.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, no.

[Luke Burbank]

Durst is getting a lot of. Well, he's getting. He's getting a lot of grief on the.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, I will say. And you don't see these because you. You have muted him. But he did, he did send out to the text chain, to the sports text chain at some point yesterday. This is the Seattle Sports Weekend I've dreamed of my entire life.

[Luke Burbank]

So I wondered if that was him because here's what I've Andrew, if something.

[Andrew Walsh]

If somebody likes. Yes, you can see the computer.

[Luke Burbank]

This is the hack. This is the wind. This is the magic window into. And I also, I think I might have Roden blocked.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, interesting.

[Luke Burbank]

Because this happened on two text chains for me this weekend. I saw that my brother Sammy, like, loved that comment. Like, this is the Seattle sports weekend I've been dreaming of or whatever. And I was like, okay, I don't know who wrote that, but it's now on my text chain. And then I saw Camaro Kev was like, respond Like, I don't know why in the world I would have Rodenblocked. It must just be an accident, like a slip of the thumb. But in a text chain that I'm in, I guess with. With Kamaro, Kev and Roden, same thing happened. It was like Camaro Kev was like liking a comment that I had never seen. And I'm wondering if that's if I got Roden blocked.

[Andrew Walsh]

I wonder if you were in a. In a. Just sort of a. Some sort of a fit of anger at a bad. Maybe sports time or something or. It was like, I don't want to.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, now I feel bad because I'm not. I'm not walking around intentionally trying to.

[Andrew Walsh]

Have Roden block, especially because Roden might hit you up for something else. Can you block somebody just on a specific chain or if you unblock caller.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, I'm sorry, Roden. He's unblocked now.

[Andrew Walsh]

I just want to make contact, but because that could. If you block somebody, you're blocking them across the board, right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew Walsh]

So he exactly might have been texting you about home improvement stuff or something.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, no, he's had no ability to contact me for God knows how long.

[Andrew Walsh]

Good Lord. Oh, I was going to say, though. Okay, so Ders is obviously the kind of worst case scenario guy who's always ready for the bottom to fall out in any situation. I think I am probably maybe a little bit closer to him than you on the spectrum, but maybe between you both, even now, like I said, I've just seen my heart has been broken too many times and too many like, like, fantastical ways that I won't. I just, I won't fully accept that we've made it to the playoffs until we actually have made it to the playoffs. And especially like, again, winning the division would be so huge for me. But, like, I'm very cautiously optimistic. Right. And then on the other side of things is I got a text from you yesterday. I don't know if it was to just me or to everybody that was already looking ahead to a multi season dominance of charity. Yes, exactly. And you're already thinking about, like, while while Ders might be calling the season over after the first pitch of the season, you're already looking ahead.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm predicting a dynasty.

[Andrew Walsh]

You're already predicting a dynasty of the Mariners being the team to beat in the American League. And God bless. I hope you're. Hope you're right, but it's just amazing how you're already, like, you're already counting rings.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. That is definitely where my. Where my mind goes when things are going well for us. Well, anyway, it was a fun weekend and I'm feeling pretty, pretty good.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thank you, baby.

[Luke Burbank]

All right, let's thank some donors who are making TBTL happen. This is 100% listener supported podcasting. I don't know where these folks come down on baseball talk, but they just got a heaping helping of it. And I hope Clea Style in Denver, Colorado, can. Can handle it. Thank you, Clea. Thanks to Michael Barney in Sacramento, California, and also Anastasia Hoffman of Lunenburg, Massachusetts.

[Andrew Walsh]

I feel like every time we read.

[Luke Burbank]

Anastasia's name, we go back and forth between Anastasia, Anastasia and Anastasia, because I.

[Andrew Walsh]

Think both are appropriate. Just depending on then you know which one you pick, which one your parents picked. Yeah, so we got that right.

[Luke Burbank]

Just keep donating Anastasia, AKA Anastasia, and. And one day, one year, we'll get it right.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think Anastasia is more common.

[Luke Burbank]

I think, I think you're right. I Think you're right. Anastasia is. Is the out here. Anyway, thanks so much to Wendy Ross, who's in Cheyenne, Wyoming.

[Andrew Walsh]

Nice. Thank you, Wendy. Appreciate that.

[Luke Burbank]

Elizabeth Gerard. Hey, Elizabeth Gerard in Seattle, Washington. That's your friend and my friend.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's our friend. Yes. Thank you, Liz. You know, I always think of you as a Liz, not an Elizabeth. So that sort of snuck up on me there.

[Luke Burbank]

I always think of Allison Walker as an Allison Walker. I think both names. Who's. By the way, Allison's in Essex Junction, Vermont.

[Andrew Walsh]

Ooh, it's starting to get beautiful around that part right now.

[Luke Burbank]

And you know, Cal Raleigh's from Vermont. Isn't that the weirdest place for him to be from?

[Andrew Walsh]

That is interesting. He seems more cult, but he went to. Did he go to school in Florida, though?

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, probably for college.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's what I mean. I think that's.

[Luke Burbank]

But he feel at Vermont. I didn't know there. There were any baseball players. Well, he was born in North Carolina.

[Andrew Walsh]

I was going to say. I thought he's a North Carolina guy because that's where his family still lives. Did you hear his dad talking about how on the off day Kale just wanted to mow the lawn?

[Luke Burbank]

No, but I swear to God, I heard last night on the, the. The broadcast, they were saying they were talking like he was from Vermont.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's the first. Yeah, I think they're. I think they were getting several things wrong.

[Luke Burbank]

I.

[Andrew Walsh]

Because I heard them talking about that trident. They had something wrong about that. They were talking about, I'm sorry, we're going a little bit back into baseball talk. But they were talking about Logan Gilbert's nickname and how he got it. And I think they're. I think their version of events is only partially true. And then they literally, like, had a question about it and then somebody, like, tweeted at them an answer and they're like, social media is great. Here's an answer to that. I'm like, I don't think that's accurate. I. They don't. I think that story hasn't been embellished. And whatever they were saying about Cal Raleigh being in Vermont, because that stuck.

[Luke Burbank]

Out to me, because I was like, I've never heard of him being from Vermont. That makes no sense. That's why it stuck out to me. They literally just said, andrew, can you imagine going on a broadcast and saying a wrong thing?

[Andrew Walsh]

No. I'm a professional, though. Look it up in the book.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that's right. Hey, thank you so much to our donors for making tbtl. Possible. We really appreciate you and we absolutely could not do this without. Gotcha.

[Andrew Walsh]

Here I go once again with the email. Every week, I hope that it's from a female. Oh, man. It's not from a female.

[Luke Burbank]

All right, let's jump right to. We cannibalized all of the top story time with my baseball. My baseball thoughts. So let's jump right to the emails and emails, which, I'll be honest, were a bit neglected last week. That's on me. But now the sheriff's back in town and we're going to get back into the emails. What do you got?

[Andrew Walsh]

Do you know what that sound was?

[Luke Burbank]

Was that the sheriff's gun?

[Andrew Walsh]

That was the sheriff's gun. It ricocheted off.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah. A spittoon.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, no, it was a gun ricocheting, but then. Then I spit into my spittoon and it sounded.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, I thought maybe you shot a spittoon with the gun.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah, Maybe that's what it bounced off of. Yep, that sounds like a spittoon to me. Thanks for identifying that. I need to figure out what's going on with the voicemail. And, oh, by the way, I started to tell you where I was. I was just going to sleep, actually. And I'm not saying that to make you feel bad. I'm saying your timing on trying to hack into the voicemail line was literally perfect the other day, Luke, because I was laying in bed after being up all night. I think it was around 7 in the morning, right. And I was just about to fall asleep and I was probably reading my book, and then all of a sudden I got this notification that said somebody in Southern Washington is trying to get into the voicemail line. And they sent me like. Like the three letter code and I just said, or the six number code or whatever. And I. And I sent it to you and I thought, man, a moment later, like, literally a moment later, and you would have been sol. But I'm glad you're able to hack in. I got to figure out what you played and what you haven't. And I'll try to get some voicemails ready for tomorrow, but in the meantime, we got this email from the listener, Mary. Our pale Mary. The ranter. Oh, yes, the raver. Yes. She says, I was just listening to the episode called Badlands or whatever we called that one, which brought up one of my pet peeves, or the thing that makes me scream into the place where you scream. A pound of almonds takes about 1800 to 2000 gallons of water. We Were talking about how much I love almonds, Luke, and how there's a little bit of guilt around it because you always hear about how much water it takes to grow almonds. Right. And it's not great for the planet. And Mary says a pound of almonds takes about 1800 to 2000 gallons of water. A pound of beef takes between 1800 and 2000 gallons of water to produce. Not that I'm a cranky vegetarian or anything. The meat eaters who pull the gallons of water per almond without context are really annoying. Real annoying. Eat what you want, but let's all put it into perspective. There might not be enough high ground after all, or there might not be high ground after all on that. And that is interesting. You know, I'm trusting Mary's numbers here. I haven't fact checked the. This. I don't like, you know, the truth to get in the way of a good point, but it is one of those things where it's kind of like.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, you know, Mary's from Vermont.

[Andrew Walsh]

She grew up in Vermont, but I think played ball in Florida.

[Luke Burbank]

Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's my understanding of things. But anyway, it is like, you know, we could double check those numbers. But it is one of those things that, like, certain facts just kind of get into the water supply, as it were. Right. And then we all kind of repeat them, but then without context, you're like, wait, wait a second. Well, what about these other things that I'm eating, you know, or should we really? I do feel like there's. There's this thing about making people feel bad with a fact like this without putting it into any context. And then you just carry it around like a Reader's Digest factoid. You know what I mean?

[Luke Burbank]

Right. And not to mention that I think what Mary is also kind of implying is that there are some people, let's say, who are meat eaters and they sort of, they don't want to feel like lectured to or whatever. So they're trying to use this data point about almonds as a way of kind of being like, look, even you tree huggers with your almonds.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right?

[Luke Burbank]

Look what you're doing.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

And she's saying, yeah, but if you're biting into a cheeseburger, if you're biting into four quarter Pounders, which, if I'm doing the math right, yep, carry the one, that's a pound. If you eat a pound of. And if we're going to go with Mary's numbers, like, if you're eating a pound of hamburger, that. That's Going to, you know, that's going to have involved as much water as that pound of almonds. Could you eat. Could a human eat a pound of almonds? Would you get sick? I think in one pound of almonds sounds like so much.

[Andrew Walsh]

That sounds like a lot lot in one sitting, certainly.

[Luke Burbank]

By the way, not only did I download a driver yesterday, I'm an excellent driver downloader, but I did something else yesterday that I was kind of proud of, which was I made some chili, like a kind of vegetarian chili, but I just didn't even follow a recipe. I just made it. I used some impossible. Some of my impossible beef that I like. And it was all stuff I had at my house. Okay. It was in the morning, it was rainy yesterday. It ended up being a nice sunny day. But in the morning it felt like, oh, is this the first cozy football Sunday of the year? You know? And I was like, I'd like some chili. I'd like something yummy that's simmering for a good part of the day. And then I was just like, okay, I know I've got a. I've got most of a white onion in the fridge still and I've got one of those cubes of impossible hamburger and I've got some kidney beans around and I've got, you know, and like.

[Andrew Walsh]

Did you have. What did you use for tomato base? Did you have.

[Luke Burbank]

I had tomato, I had crushed. I had. I have a bunch of cans of like crushed tomatoes and I had some tomato sauce and stuff. So I, I pretty much had, you know, that, that pretty much everything you would put in chili, but not. It's like I started looking at some recipes and yeah, there was going to be some stuff like they all call for cumin. I'm not a big cumin guy. I actually have cumin. But I just. For me, there'd be too much cumin in something. Is a. Is. Is more of a problem than not enough cumin. So I'm just kind of skipping it. I was looking at all these recipes, basically, Basically. And in the olden days, Andrew, I would be like, well, I'm seeing something on this list of ingredients and I don't have that thing. So I guess I just can't do this, or I guess I need to drive down to the grocery store. But I was like, what really is a chili? It is a super duper flavored up, simmered thing of beef, or in this case, fake beef and beans and some onions. You kind of can't mess it up. And like, like, as long as you put enough, you know, garlic powder and I had some garlic to it, you know, put in, minced up some garlic. I just kind of like improv. I browned off this stuff and then I put it in the, in the pressure cooker and I just put in a bunch of stuff that seemed like it would be kind of good in there. And I gave it a healthy amount of, of onion powder and garlic salt and paprika and stuff. And then I just set it and forget it. And oh my God, it was so good. And, and it was the fact that I didn't over obsess about the quote unquote recipe because I just realized what it was. This is just a simmered salty something.

[Andrew Walsh]

Simmered salt. Oh, thank you. I need a show title.

[Luke Burbank]

Simmered salty something.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm so hungry right now. You got me thinking I might make chili later. I'm very proud of my chili. I think I've told you this. I think I've used it as a show pick. I've been making the same chili recipe that my friend wrote down on the back of an onion page. A day calendar. Love it because I still have the actual piece of paper. And I know that on the, the front it's a joke about Christopher Hitchens. I think it's from 2006 or something. And on the back, she just hand wrote this recipe for how she makes chili. And that was the first chili I ever made. And now I follow it.

[Luke Burbank]

Do you even need the recipe anymore?

[Andrew Walsh]

Probably the first time in the season I do. And I probably just always double check all of them because it's easy for me to forget, like maybe a certain ingredient here or there. But I'm really, I gotta say, like, there are foods that I make that I just, I think are, you know, are good for, you know, they're good enough for home or whatever. I honestly think that my chili is pretty bomb. Like, I think I've got it pretty dialed in with some pretty interesting flavors. I like a very bright kind of chili, if that makes sense. Not too well, like you kind of mentioning cumin or whatever. Like not, not too earthy or whatever. You got me thinking about this. But I might hold off a little bit until a little bit later in the fall.

[Luke Burbank]

I know it's going to be in the 80s this week. You might want to wait.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm going to hold off because I can probably bring it way too much throughout the, throughout the season. But yeah, you got me thinking about that. You got me thinking about jambalaya. It's time to switch over to my. To my winter menu, I guess, here at the Walsh Manor.

[Luke Burbank]

I know, I know that I'm a broken record with this, but it's like, I love that it's still nice out. I absolutely love this. And yet I'm low key. I'm pretty ready to start. Like when you just said Jumbalaya, like a football Sunday or maybe, Andrew, a baseball Sunday in October when it's getting kind of. Kind of cold and rainy out and you're making something really cozy. I mean, that is. That's pretty fun too, so.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes, it is. Although this is beautiful. I love the long. It's nice outside, but you can tell the sun is in a different position. Like the shadows are getting very long. We must be looking at switching over the clocks pretty soon, huh?

[Luke Burbank]

I've got that on the calendar somewhere. That's a dark day for me, literally.

[Andrew Walsh]

And sorry to bring that up at the.

[Luke Burbank]

No, that's okay.

[Andrew Walsh]

It'll happen.

[Luke Burbank]

Happen. When is that? Anyway, believe me, they'll. The local news will tell me when it's time to fall back or whatever it is. Hey, listen, Andrew, it's great to have you back.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thank you.

[Luke Burbank]

We missed you. Thank you everybody for listening to today's episode of tbt. We'll be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio. I have great news. I don't think the Mariners play today.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right.

[Luke Burbank]

They do.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, no, you are correct about that day off.

[Luke Burbank]

So my point is, you guys will be spared from baseball talk tomorrow. Nothing to respond to.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm happy to do a sports like put a dollar in the jar thing and we donate it to a cause if you want. I don't know if that puts too much strictures on the. On the show, but we will be.

[Luke Burbank]

Back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio. So please do join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Monday. Take care of yourselves and please remember, no mountain too tall.

[Andrew Walsh]

And good luck to all. So growing up, I was watching monkeys.

[Luke Burbank]

On TV and I saw like, how.

[Andrew Walsh]

Fun they doing jumping around. And I described myself, I look monkey. And I saved myself on monkeys. And I just said, sorry, guys, I.

[Luke Burbank]

Have to make the plate.

[Andrew Walsh]

Made the catch and threw a cannon back to the infield. Hey, you gotta catch it.

[Luke Burbank]

Wait, so do you. A little bit too hard.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sorry, mate. Do you have monkeys running around the house? No, they have their own house. Power out.