#4590 Louvre It Or Leave It

Summary

TBTL Episode #4590: Louvre It Or Leave It

Date: November 4, 2025
Hosts: Luke Burbank, Andrew Walsh
Theme: New York adventures, urban observations, infamous boat buys, Louvre heists, and tech failures (with their trademark self-deprecating humor).

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Episode Overview

Luke checks in from New York City, regaling Andrew with tales of jazz clubs, diner culture, and hotel follies. The duo riffs on eccentric NYC experiences, notorious real estate purchases (looking at you, "Titanic 2"), and newsworthy security mishaps at the Louvre. Alongside serious news, they debate the peculiarities of AI’s limits, self-driving cars, and the little social rituals that make city life memorable, with special guest voicemails adding to the fun.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Luke's New York City Dispatch

• Jazz at Birdland
  Luke enjoyed a quintessential NYC evening at Birdland, listening to Vince Giordano and the Nighthawks play vintage jazz while noting how their stage banter was straight out of an "I Think You Should Leave" sketch.

  • Quote: “Every person he was naming could have been from the ‘I think you should leave’ charades sketch.” (06:00)
  • Memorable Moment: Waiting for Vince to name-drop “Roy Donk” (06:39)
  • Timestamps:
    • [02:55] – Luke’s voice gives away his wild NYC night
    • [03:11] – Karaoke at Sing Sing (with a Jordan Peele anecdote)
    • [06:21] – Impressions of Birdland’s jazz night

• Diner Life & Hotel Woes
  Luke describes the details of a classic NYC diner, including faded celebrity headshots and menus with “40,000 items,” plus an overzealous housekeeper who provides a redundant tutorial on the “Do Not Disturb” sign.

  • Quote: "There's just nothing like a headshot of Sipowitz that's been getting beaten down by the sun for the last 27 years." (07:44)
  • Housekeeping Comedy: Over-friendly service becomes a minor saga, both embarrassing and endearing for Luke, especially as he’s caught podcasting while reclining on the bed. (08:31–14:50)
  • Memorable Banter: Comparisons to “the helpful but Budinsky style aunts” from Progressive commercials and Tobias Fünke’s “Mrs. Feather Bottom” persona. (15:47–16:44)

2. Voting, Progressivism, and Seattle Small Talk

• The hosts discuss Seattle’s mail-in voting versus the lost local tradition of in-person booths ([18:00]) and commiserate over political flyers.
• Andrew and Luke reminisce about old-school civic rituals and lament the enthusiastic turnout of campaign mailers.
  • Quote: “I just like that tradition. I remember being a kid, going to school, and they’d say, ‘the gym is closed today because people are voting in there.’” (18:21)

3. Listener Donors and Regional Shout-outs

• As they thank listeners from Seattle to Dothan, AL, these sections are loaded with banter and playful diversions (like the appropriateness of “Hemlock Apartments”) and more pop culture detours (27:01–31:00).
• Luke and Andrew evaluate the wisdom of naming buildings after poisonous plants and ponder what names would be even worse.
  • Quote: “I wouldn’t name my apartment building Poison Ivy.” – Andrew (29:28)

4. Foosball, Stakes, and Childhood Religion

• Luke retells his epic childhood foosball matches with metaphysical stakes: if Luke won, Christianity was real; if his friend won, everyone’s ok thanks to Meher Baba.
  • Quote: "If I won, it meant Jesus Christ was real, and if [Peter] won, it meant Meher Baba was real ... if I was right and Christianity was the real thing, it meant Peter and his whole family were going into eternal hell." (32:17)

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Main Stories & Deep Dives

5. Top Story: Staten Island Ferry Fiasco

• Background:
  Comedians Colin Jost and Pete Davidson impulsively bought a decommissioned Staten Island ferry to turn into a performance venue—but logistics and costs spiraled.
• Key Details:
  • The city listed the ferry at a steep price (much above scrap value), and a targeted social media campaign baited wealthy, nostalgic NYC celebs.
  • Their LLC is cheekily called “Titanic 2,” a name now haunting them amid lawsuits and insurance refusals.
  • The project is now a money pit ($600k in storage fees, facing mounting losses).
  • Quotes:
    • “The purchase was neither practical nor a joke.” (37:53, quoting NYT)
    • “Look, we got stoned. We bought a boat. It's fine.” – Pete Davidson (40:28)
    • “That's more embarrassing than being high and buying the boat.” – Luke, on Jost being sober during the buy (40:54)
    • “The company that owns this boat is called Titanic 2.” – Luke (41:05)
• Memorable Moment:
  Even their law firm is now suing “Titanic 2” for unpaid bills, adding to the debacle’s dark comedy (41:16).

6. Louvre Security Blunders

• Heist Recap:
  Recent robbery at the Louvre involved a crew disguised as construction workers, who entered via a stolen ladder, with a cyclist—not the museum—first raising the alarm.
• Key Observations:
  • The group used stolen equipment and yellow vests to pass as workers.
  • The security failings included not just physical lapses but digital ones: the password for the Louvre’s security cameras was simply “louvre.”
  • Quotes:
    • “How is it not like ‘Louvre123! I hate you’?” – Luke, on rudimentary passwords (47:30)
    • “I feel like I would have just gone by, and I would have been like, they have vests on. They're allowed to do whatever they're doing.” (45:09)
    • “Not even with an exclamation point or anything?” – Andrew on the basic password (47:02)
• Memorable Moment:
  Luke recounts Princess Bride and NY street scenes to illustrate the absurdities of both museum security and city living (48:50).

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7. AI, Technology, and Comedic Frustrations

• Listener April’s AI Rant ([54:25]):
  • She enlists AI to count words for a grant application—AI repeatedly fails, apologizing but never delivering, igniting a “very Andrew-like” spiral of exasperation.
  • Quote: “AI is good at apologizing for being useless.” – Andrew (56:14)
• Passwords and Internet Rage ([47:47]):
  • Luke and Andrew lament password rules, overzealous security measures, and vent frustrations with impersonal institutions—sometimes by making passive-aggressive passwords like “wage theft.”
  • Quote: “It … involves me writing the most hateful things about this bank into password form.” – Luke (51:02)

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8. Self-Driving Catastrophes (Literally)

• Luke relays a Waymo self-driving car tragedy that killed a beloved San Francisco deli cat (“KitKat”), prompting local outrage and political calls for more stringent rules.
• Quote: “Now I may not use Waymos anymore because of that one incident.” – Luke (57:35)
• Andrew highlights the bigger trend—that humans historically hit more animals with cars than self-driving tech, yet the story captures hearts because “that’s absolutely heartbreaking … but maybe cars in general shouldn’t be on the roads.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Running Jokes

• “I do not bounce back the way I once did.” – Luke, on NYC nightlife (03:21)
• “Are you doing all right? You’ve barely touched your Mexican burger with Munster.” – Luke (08:26)
• “Is that a threat or a promise?” – Andrew, on the persistent housekeeper (14:50)
• “I still think I’d put a shirt on over it, but it’d probably be open in front.” – Andrew, on his imagined noir lifestyle (26:30)
• “If you win, we all win. But if I win, I'm really screwed.” – Luke, on childhood foosball existentialism (33:18)
• “As long as they need someone to count words, I’ve still got a job.” – Luke, about the limits of AI (56:43)
• “I have to go in and act like I forgot my password and establish a new password … it involves me writing the most hateful things about this bank into password form.” – Luke (51:02)
• “You’re the word counter. We got this.” – Andrew, riffing on old tech jobs (56:51)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Jazz Club & I Think You Should Leave: 02:55–07:11
• Diner/Hotel Stories: 07:11–16:44
• Voting & Seattle Politics: 17:01–21:00
• Hemlock Apartments & Real Estate Names: 28:04–31:00
• Foosball & Childhood Stakes: 32:17–33:47
• Ferry Fiasco News: 33:50–42:39
• Louvre Heist Review & Security Lapses: 42:40–51:02
• Password Rage/AI Failures: 51:02–56:43
• Listener Voicemail (April on AI’s Limits): 54:25–56:08
• Self-Driving Car Kills Cat: 57:10–59:14
• End of Episode Banter: 61:17–end

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a classic example of TBTL’s unique blend: city observations, deeply specific pop-culture riffs, relatable frustration with modern life, and warm banter that folds even the most mundane mishaps into compelling, hilarious storytelling. Whether you came for the New York jazz, the vintage foosball drama, or the Louvre’s cybersecurity facepalm, you’ll leave with new inside jokes and the sense that even the most ridiculous detours are worth the ride.

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Power Out.

Transcript

[Andrew]

Quarter to four.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm gonna take a nap or something. I don't like to take naps. I don't like to wake up more than once a day. Cause when I first wake up, I get that shock of who I am and everything. I really don't like to do that more than once a day.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

TBTL this is a show for dogs, about dogs, starring one dog and one dirty dog.

[Andrew]

It's called the Internet, and it's a fresh new way to check.

[Luke Burbank]

Buy clothing and surf music.

[Andrew]

Hey, you either get it or you don't.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't, but I am so excited.

[Andrew]

To be a part of it.

[April]

You're not over sharing. You are not oversharing. Boring people came up with that. Boring people made that up. They made up over sharing because they're too boring to handle an interesting conversation. You're not over sharing.

[Andrew]

Keep sharing.

[April]

I want to hear everything. I want to hear it all, and then I want to hear a little bit more. Make the boring people uncomfortable.

[Luke Burbank]

Share.

[April]

Keep up the good work, everyone.

[Andrew]

All right.

[Luke Burbank]

Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Tuesday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. What a fun, sexy time for you. My name's Luke Burbank. I'm your host. You're still doing a podcard. Coming to you from midtown Manhattan in New York City, where it is an absolutely splendid November day. It's November 4th, my friends, and it's. Oh, my God, Pa. It's just beautiful. It is just beautiful here. As we arrive at episode 4000, 590 in a collector's series, Let the Fun Begin was being very New York last night, and I went to a jazz show at Birdland. There's nothing classier than boring jazz music. I am here to tell you. And I got a new awareness of an I think you should leave sketch. A new and real awareness of that, which I'll tell you about. Also, speaking of New Yorkers in the news, Pete Davidson and Colin Jost of Saturday Night Live fame, they have bought a decommissioned Staten Island Ferry, and it's not going super great.

[Andrew]

I wish I hadn't done that.

[Luke Burbank]

They're really giving me a run for my money in terms of questionable maritime decisions, and I like to see that makes me feel better about myself. Also, the security at the Louvre obviously wasn't super great, nor was their cyber security. It turns out it's your lucky day.

[Andrew]

You just found a USB flash drive.

[Luke Burbank]

In the parking lot. The password for the security cameras at the Louvre was not the most creative Password. We'll talk about that. And then speaking of people who are, in fact, very creative, let's tell you about the longest running cobra of the show. He might be best known for his depictions of the tall ships.

[Andrew]

I was cyberbullied within an inch of my life last night.

[Luke Burbank]

He's Andrew Walsh and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

[Andrew]

Good morning, Luke. I'll put my ballot away for a moment. I'll finish filling that out later. Happy election day. And may I say, and I say this with love and celebration, you sound like a man who spent last night at a jazz club. Were you there late?

[Luke Burbank]

I wasn't there late, but where I was later than that was a karaoke bar called Sing Sing where I did not actually sign up for any songs. But what I did do was scream sing along with every song that was being put in, particularly by the people in my group. And I'm getting to this age where honestly, first of all, if I'm out past 11 and if I'm talking loudly at all and if I have even one to four drinks, this is now what it sounds like. I do not bounce back the way I once did.

[Andrew]

Well, I don't say that to put you on the spot. You are traveling for fun. You're allowed to have fun. So I hope that didn't sound fun. Finger waggy. It's just a sound I hadn't, I hadn't heard heard in a minute. But it sounds like you're having fun out there. And also Sing Sing is a wonderful name for New York carrier Carrie. Carrie is a really good.

[Luke Burbank]

It is a real. And I believe it closed down for a while. Maybe it was during the pandemic. I remember coming here on other trips and, and going, oh, is Sing Sing still there? And then it wasn't. And then it's now back and better than ever, baby. Yeah, it was a fun night. I went to that place once with Hollywood power player Wynn Rosenfeld, and Jordan Peele was not, I remember you guys, the famous Jordan Peele yet. I think I've told the story many times on the show. But like, you know, he was a guy who had been on Mad TV and had not yet made get out or done any of the stuff that we. Now, I don't think Key and Peele, Key and Peele certainly was not out. And, and we had a great time. We got a karaoke room and we, you know, sang our hearts out. And at some point towards the end of the night, he said, I really like hanging out with you because you just treat me like a regular person. And I thought, it's not that hard, Jordan. You're on mad TV for two seasons. I'm able to contain my. Myself. But, yeah, it's. It's back open. It was a. It was a fun night. It started off at Birdland at this kind of legendary New York jazz club. And the band that was playing was called Vince Giordano and the Nighthawks. And their whole sort of musical styling, the era that they focus on is, like, sort of 19, I think, 1920s and 30s kind of swing jazz. And the guy, Vince Giordano was great. He's a sort of older guy, as you might imagine. He played all these different instruments, but he also would kind of set every song up and talk about the history of the song, who wrote it, things like that. And I leaned over to Beck at some point as he was in, like, he was introducing, like, the seventh song and talking about how this was like, Marcus the Worm Hicks had played this song or Tiny Boo shorterly or whatever. Every person he was naming could have been from the I think you should leave charades sketch. And, like, I've always loved that sketch. I always thought it was funny. But what I realized is whoever wrote that clearly had probably been at Birdland, probably listening to Vince Giordano name all of these old time jazzy guys, and thought, wouldn't it be funny if somebody was obsessed with these guys?

[Andrew]

Well, I do. I don't think that Vince Giordano is the first one to do it either. I think that whoever wrote that sketch is just familiar with those kind of people who do that. I mean, that is very jazzy thing. Did you enjoy the music?

[Luke Burbank]

I loved it. It was really. It was really great. It was in the downstairs of Birdland, which I haven't been to before, and they had this big band, and one guy was playing something that was like a violin with a horn on it. Like, it was like some kind of odd sort of Frankenstein's monster of instruments. But it was. It was great. Like, the music was awesome. It was. It was a really wonderful night. But. But, yeah, I was. I was. I was really waiting for him to say Roy Donk. I would have been. And in fact, that would be fun, because I don't know what the Venn diagram overlap is of people who go to those shows and who also watch. I think you should leave. But you could throw a little. You could throw a little Roy Donk in there just for the people like me.

[Andrew]

Mm. I wonder if he knows who Roy Donk is or who Tim Robinson is that might.

[Luke Burbank]

Who the idea of Roy Donk is.

[Andrew]

Who the idea of Roy Donk is. Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

Other notable things that have now happened to me since I've been in New York City. Andrew. One of them just happened at the diner. Beck and I went to get some lunch and it's a New York City diner, which you've probably been to before. The things about New York City diners that I love. One, so many headshots of anyone even marginally famous who has ever even possibly dined at the place. We love to see it. Most of them absolutely. Sun faded from the. You know, there's just nothing like a headshot of Sipowitz that's just been getting beaten down on by the sun for the last 27 years. A good Dennis Franz headshot in the diner. We love to see it.

[Andrew]

It could have been a butt shot with Dennis Franz and nyu.

[Luke Burbank]

Absolutely. So you got, you've got all these headshots, signed headshots everywhere. You, you have a menu that has roughly 40,000 items on it.

[Andrew]

And is it like heavily laminated, triple.

[Luke Burbank]

Laminated for safety, like just. I mean, it is a. It's a huge tome. Trying to read through this menu and the. Because we did have a little fun last night, we are moving a little slow today. I took great joy in just narrating things from the menu that would make Becca almost lose her breakfast.

[Andrew]

One of my greatest.

[Luke Burbank]

Are you doing all right? You've barely touched your Mexican burger with Munster. And then the other thing at the diner that was really amazing to me was these. A couple of gals came in and sat down. The waiter came over to take their order, and the woman asked, do you have coffee? You're in a New York City 24 hour diner in the Applejack diner, and you're curious if they have coffee.

[Andrew]

What was the answer?

[Luke Burbank]

The person said, of course. That's what actually sort of tipped me off. It was this. I wasn't really listening to the conversation, but the shock in the voice of the waiter caused me to do this thing that I didn't even know my brain was capable of, which is to actually go back and rewind in my own brain what I just heard and didn't pay attention to the first time.

[Andrew]

You know, were the clientele who asked this, did they seem like stereotypically not from the area? Like, did they have the sort. No, they didn't. Okay. No.

[Luke Burbank]

So no, they seemed, they definitely seemed like, you know, did not sound like English was like not their first language. It didn't seem like they were necessarily from out of town.

[Andrew]

I meant. Yeah, I didn't even. I meant almost sort of like where they like kind of like in from, you know, in from the Midwest.

[Luke Burbank]

They were wearing. And they were like Iowa sweatshirts or something. And you know, like they didn't seem like they had just gotten off the last turn up truck or whatever it was. And then the other thing, along with that mystifying coffee order was we just had here in the hotel room. I would say one of the friendliest, but you might even say over friendliest housekeeping folks I've ever experienced. So I had hung the sign that like, we don't need housekeeping today sign because I knew I was going to be in here doing the show. And I'm also. I'm going to be honest with you, Andrew, we have cameras off today because the Internet is a little slow. And I am actually in a very embarrassing state of affairs as I do this show. There's not really a good desk in this hotel room or a good place for me to set up my thing. So I'm sitting on the bed. Be honest. I'm reclining on the bed right now. And I've got this microphone in my laptop. And so I had put the sign out that said, you know, we don't need the room made up, please. I guess. Did it fall off the door or something? So it had fallen off the door. So we get a knock at the door and I'm a little confused because I had put the sign out, no thank you to housekeeping. And then Becca goes and answers the door and. And this person from housekeeping, she says, do you need housekeeping? And we said, no, we're fine. She goes, do you need the garbage taken out? We said, no, we're okay. Do you need the towels changed? We're like. And at some point I was like, I just want to give this person something to do. Like, yeah, okay, I'll take another towel. And she goes to Becca, she goes, let me show you something. And she does this very long demonstration of if the sign falls off the door or gets turned around. Then she. Then the management makes her come and ring the doorbell because they don't know if we actually want the room made up or not. This, by the way, is the opposite problem of what seems to have happened in the industry that we've talked about, Andrew, which is nobody makes up the rooms anymore.

[Andrew]

This. I heard all of this, by the way.

[Luke Burbank]

I think, you know, you were hearing this too, right? Verify.

[Andrew]

I could also hear the just knowing you really well. Like, I could hear the restraint in your voice. Like, you guys each said thank you like 100 times. And I don't think either one of you meant it. In fact, the more you said it, the more I thought you just want this out of your life. I heard her say, and I couldn't tell what was going on, but I was very curious, so I'm glad this came up. I heard her say, let me show you something about the sign. And I was like, how is she explaining how a do not disturb sign worked? I thought it might have been like. I didn't tell you this, Luke, but I've been dipping my toes into some just a tiny bit of Dungeons and Dragons play on my computer.

[Luke Burbank]

Interesting. I remember when this later. I remember when this seed of an idea was born.

[Andrew]

Do you? Because I've been kind of curious for a long, long time. I've never played. But then somebody got me to download game, which we got to talk about it at some point because it is so unlike anything that you would associate with me. At least that I would associate with me. Maybe you have other ideas of what I get up to when I'm playing video games, but I do not play this kind of video game. But all of that is to say I am now quasi, quasi familiar with the idea of a 20 sided die. And I was wondering, is there something going on with this sign that is hanging on the door outside of your hotel room that it's like not just simply no, thank you on one side and thank you on the other, but Maybe it's a 20 sided sign and you have to have it turned exactly the right way to say, yes, I want towel. No, I don't want the garbage emptied. And please don't knock too loudly because I have a headache because we were out at a karaoke bar late last night.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a four sided sign. So it has each one of those possibilities.

[Andrew]

Okay, good.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a pretty standard little hanging sign that I don't think Becca needed a full tutorial on. But this was the. What you heard in my voice, really Andrew, was mortification because it's embarrassing for me to have anyone observe me doing this show at all, even under normal circumstances, let alone I'm lying down on the bed holding this microphone, talking into my computer because you and I were about to start doing the sound check. So, like I'm. I'm not only doing the show, which is embarrassing, I'm doing it in the most embarrassing way possible. And now this housekeeper would again, I mean, credit to her, I guess, takes her job very seriously, is dedicated to the task, but would not leave us alone. She goes, she. She comes. And I already ran through it. She was like, do you want more towels? And I'm like, I guess we'll take another towel. So then she comes back with three towels. She goes, I got you three towels, but you need four towels. You should really have four towels. So she puts down the three towels, disappears for what felt like about 10 minutes to go back to get the fourth towel, comes back in, puts down the fourth towel, asks us again if the garbage needs to go out. At this point, Becca is honestly just looking for something for this woman to do in the hotel.

[Andrew]

She gives her a fidget spinner.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, honestly, I think this woman might have been stimming a little bit. She just was very, like, had a lot of. Again, this is all good. This is a person who is really trying to be helpful. She was actually very nice and really dedicated to the job, which is such a cool thing. It was just like the timing was not ideal. And finally we finally. And then she said, she's like, all right, well, you guys have a great day. I'll see you tomorrow.

[Andrew]

Is that a threat or a promise?

[Luke Burbank]

It felt ominous. It's like that's the part of the horror movie where you realize its housekeeper is actually evil. She says, I'll see you tomorrow, with a look in her eye that tells you things are not going to be okay, but I'm going to do everything I can to avoid being here when she shows up tomorrow. Although based on a recording schedule, it's very likely I'll be in here trying to do the show with the 20 sided sign on the set up wrong somehow on the door. And we will get to once again spend some quality time with this gal.

[Andrew]

Do you remember it was probably only about a year ago. Is in somewhat heavy rotation. Maybe a couple of years ago, the commercial for. And this is the problem with commercials, if you can't remember what the product was. I want to say it was insurance. And I want to say it was progressive, although I'm not 100% on that. But they were playing around with a bunch of puns like, hey, we just got our new home and everything is great. The only problem is we have clogging issues. And then it turns out there's like literally people who clog dance upstairs or something. Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

I know someone who was in one of those commercials.

[Andrew]

Oh, really? Was it the ant one? Because that's what this woman is giving me the vibes of. It's like, we have a problem.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, the ants.

[Andrew]

We have ants. And you have all these very helpful but Budinsky style ants at the end. One of them says, this is a lot of house. Hope you can keep it clean. And I love that line so much. We say it all the time.

[Luke Burbank]

She looked exactly like the women, the actors who are portraying those ants. Yeah, yeah, 100%. Yeah. She looked exactly like.

[Andrew]

Also a little bit of Miss Feather Bottom vibes, too. Is that. Is that who Tobias. Is that what Tobias called himself when.

[Luke Burbank]

He misses down his Mrs. Doubtfire character?

[Andrew]

If I'm right about that, by the way, I'm gonna be proud because that just came. That just came out of me fully formed, which sounds like something Tobias would say. But is it Mrs. Feather Bottom? Let me see here. It seems like that might be it. Although I'm not good at. Yeah, I think it was Mrs. Feather Bottom was his.

[Luke Burbank]

I would give you a ding if I had my little bell here.

[Andrew]

I'll ding myself.

[Luke Burbank]

Nice. You should. Another thing. Another thing. Tobias would definitely say.

[Andrew]

Exactly. Yeah.

[April]

Thank you, baby.

[Luke Burbank]

All right, let's thank some donors. These wonderful, amazing people are making TBTL happen with their donations. This is 100% listener supported podcasting, thanks to Dan Nicholson out there in Seattle, Washington. So they're the. This is a dumb question, Andrew, but the mayoral election in Seattle is also today, right?

[Andrew]

Yes, it is. Yes, it is. So I usually, I'm just filling out my ballot now. You know, we have mail in. I can always just, like, fill this out in advance and send it via the postal service, but I never do that. And then now it's just sort of become a tradition for me just to fill it out last minute on election day, and then I like to take a little walk. The ballot box is about, I don't know, a quarter of a mile or three quarters of a mile or something. And it just seems like a good day when you're just, like, thinking about the state of the world to sort of walk and drop your ballot in there and feel like you've done something.

[Luke Burbank]

Why did they get rid of the, you know, go down to the school and talk to some nice older volunteers and do the voting in person. Is. That's just not a thing anymore?

[Andrew]

I don't. Yeah, I assume that they. They haven't had that since I moved out here in 2008 or nine because they had mail in voting. I think since I've been here. We used to do that in New Hampshire. But we didn't have the option of mailing it in, though. So, you know, that's a huge disruption in people's days. It must suppress voter turnout. Right. If you can't drop it in the mail.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I guess that is. It doesn't make sense. I just. I like that tradition. I remember being a kid and going to school and they're like, the gym is closed today because people are voting in there. So that was kind of a nice little tradition.

[Andrew]

Yeah, yeah. The little booths with the red, white, and blue little curtains that hang.

[Luke Burbank]

How do you get I voted sticker? If you.

[Andrew]

If you.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, my God. Do they give you one in the ballot?

[Andrew]

Yep, it's right here. I just threw mine away. But I have one here that said I could. I could sell this, actually, instead of throwing it away, I could sell this to somebody who didn't vote, make a little scratch.

[Luke Burbank]

Sure, absolutely. So you guys have. Also in Seattle, kind of like here in New York with Zoran Mamdani. Like, you have a pretty progressive candidate. Right. And is she leading? Bruce Harrell?

[Andrew]

Yeah, she really kind of trounced him in the primary. But it's a top two kind of system, so they both made it to the general election. But it was a very surpr. Katie Wilson had a very surprise showing during the primary, you know, whatever that was four months ago. Whatever. But now we'll see, because there's a lot of money in this campaign. I hadn't checked my mailbox in maybe, I don't know, a week or something. We get those little emails that tell you what's in your inbox, your what's in, like, waiting for you in your mailbox. And if I don't see anything important, I just get out of the habit of actually going out and checking my mail. And yesterday I opened it up and it was chock full of flyers for all kinds of candidates and all kinds of issues on all kinds of sides. And it was bananas to see just, like, how much and. And of course, one side. Well, I don't have to totally get into it, but some of those flyers get pretty. Pretty nasty. But I don't know. I'm hoping that Katie Wilson is a hell of a candidate, so I'm hoping that she has another good showing today.

[Luke Burbank]

And she was a labor organizer before this.

[Andrew]

Yeah, yeah. So the ding on her is that she doesn't have governmental experience, but I would say the ding on Bruce Harrell, the incumbent, is that he does. He does, and we've seen what it is.

[Luke Burbank]

Hey, you Know who else is in Seattle? It's our friend and supporter of the.

[Andrew]

Show, Kevin Swan Tech of Seattle, Washington. That's right. Wow. You know, we have a. We have a lot of voters in our. In our.

[Luke Burbank]

We do.

[Andrew]

Thank you list today.

[Luke Burbank]

And we know that these people all voted because these people, they, you know, they stand behind the things they believe in, including tbt. They're donating their money to this, which tells me that they're also the kind of people who carefully research the issues in the candidates and then go out and vote. Folks like Britta Abramson, who's also in Seattle. Thank you, Brita.

[Andrew]

Thank you, Brita.

[Luke Burbank]

And then I don't know what the. If they're having an election in Dothan, Alabama, but I know Lydia Scarvey is down there in Dothan and is supporting the show. Thanks, Lydia.

[Andrew]

Lydia, Lydia. Thank you, Lydia.

[Luke Burbank]

Now, I think we have multiple listeners in Dauphin, Alabama, by the way, which is crazy.

[Andrew]

Do we actually. Because this is not the Lydia that. Whom we met in Florida. I might be confusing. My Lydia is here. But I did want to see if Dauphin, Alabama has elections. And if so, we can maybe help Lydia here by maybe helping inform her vote. I'm looking here. The election date is. Well, there's resolution. Oh, shoot. You've been following this resolution number 20251 90, right?

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, yeah, of course.

[Andrew]

Who has.

[Luke Burbank]

It's been all the news. Chris did his entire A block on it last night.

[Andrew]

That's. I was taping it, Luke. I don't like spoilers. Anyway, thank you very much, Brita. Or I'm sorry, Lydia sorry.

[Luke Burbank]

And Brita, I am sorry about this noise in the background. Andrew.

[Andrew]

It is how I know that you're really. I have a feeling you're just playing that off your computer to give it that give gritty New York sound.

[Luke Burbank]

Did I tell you I can't remember if it was on air or off air about our first night here in the hotel, in our first hotel room. No, it was something out of like a Jack Lemmon movie. The out of Towners, you know, where he's going around with his pad of paper and he's writing down everyone's name because he's so angry about stuff that he can't really fix.

[Andrew]

No, I don't think I've ever actually seen it, but go ahead. Don't let that get in the way.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a great movie. Would recommend. It's basically like Jack Lemmon and his wife are visiting New York City, but everything that can go wrong is going wrong for him, just like the reservations are messed up, just everything is. And he's got this little pad and he's just writing down everyone's name because he's going to write a strongly worded letter. This becomes his own. The only thing that he can do to feel like he has some controls, just keep writing names down in this book.

[Andrew]

Very relatable.

[Luke Burbank]

But we get here and, oh, you know, I was talking about this with Chris yesterday, Chris Hayes, off air, he was saying it is just absolutely shocking what New York City hotels can get away with just because they're in New York City. So first of all, everything is super expensive. The rooms are generally super tiny. And also, unless you're staying at the Ritz Carlton or something, they're often just like beat up. Like, you know, just. You'll go in the bathroom and like the faucet, you know, the handle on the faucet will just come off in your hand. Or like the, the, the outlets. Like in the first room we were in, the outlet that was like covering the, you know, electrical plug and just smashed, just totally destroyed. And just like everywhere you look, there's just. Things are just really, really run down and they, for some reason they don't have to fix it because it's New York City and people always come here and people need to stay somewhere and they just. Like I said to Chris, it would never happen in Phoenix. If you went into like an AC hotel in Phoenix or like a, you know, a. Even a Holiday Inn, everything would be fixed and it would work and it would be probably pretty nice. But the first room that we get in, the window was broken so that it was closed, but the frame of the window was broken so effectively it was as if the window was open. It was like so all of the noise of Broadway in midtown Manhattan all night. And it was a Saturday night too, so it was just like people were out all night long was just. It was just like we had fully opened a window out to 55th and Broadway and the noise was insane. And then also the building had some kind of crazy lighting feature on it. I think that is supposed to make the building look cool if you are walking by the building. But what it meant was there was this huge, crazy industrial white light that was underneath our window. And even with the shade pulled, the shade could not block out the light. So about every 30 seconds the entire room would light up. Like, like it was the middle of the day.

[Andrew]

This is literally out of a movie. What about the weather? You're talking about the noise and you, you said you effectively had the window open. I don't quite understand. Does it mean, like, it would be the equivalent of having the window open like a crack or like the window wide open? And what about the weather there? What's. Is it. Was it cold?

[Luke Burbank]

No, the wind, it. There was. The weather's actually been pretty nice. It wasn't that the window was. Was open. It was that even when the window was closed, it did not in any way stop the sound.

[Andrew]

Okay. But it did. It did. It did effectively close. As far as if it were cold outside, it was fine. It was mostly the sound.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay, yes, it was mostly sound related, but then light related. It was. And it was like something that they would do to try to break you down if you were like a prisoner or something. Like every time you'd start to fall asleep, someone would scream something as they were walking down Broadway. And then, and then the light, the entire room would light up to like it was like the middle of the day and then it would go off and then you'd have like between 25 and 30 seconds of rest and then it would go back on. It was absolutely miserable.

[Andrew]

I can't believe that I did not ever have the experience in my life that I just thought was going to be what it was like when I was an adult, which was I would live in an apartment somewhere in a junky old high rise, and there would be a neon sign that would buzz and flash on and off outside my window. There'd be empty whiskey bottles on the ground, and there would always be a bottle I was working on. And I would sort of sit in this. In this little kitchenette area just looking out the window while that sign just buzzed and flashed all night long. That was what I thought my future held.

[Luke Burbank]

What part of you is sad that that isn't how it turned out for.

[Andrew]

You.

[Luke Burbank]

Would have been good with that life?

[Andrew]

I feel like I could have used at least a year of it. Really sort of kick the tires on that.

[Luke Burbank]

How about the stains? How about the stains on the T shirt you're wearing?

[Andrew]

Oh, yeah, the stains. I still think I. I still think I'd put a shirt on over it, but it'd probably be open in front. You know what I mean? It would be a short sleeve button down, but I would have the white stained shirt on and I would not have buttoned the button down.

[Luke Burbank]

Now, what if a dame with a problem came by? Honestly, you got dragged into a whole world.

[Andrew]

You weren't expecting that. That actually sounds more ambitious than what I was Even picturing, to be honest with you, that that implies some sort of income and skill set.

[Luke Burbank]

Right, right. And also like a business card, a working phone.

[Andrew]

Yeah, right, exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

All things that you're not. You're not planning for your life as.

[Andrew]

You know, Luke, when I need to make a phone call, I have to go all the way down to street level and use the phone. Booth.

[Luke Burbank]

Sidewalk.

[Andrew]

And then when it inevitably ends up ending on the sour note that it must end on the conversation, I will then take the phone and then bang it into the cradle three times before hanging up. That's how I communicate.

[Luke Burbank]

But don't forget about the fact that you have to go down the stairs because you're three months late on your rent. You have to avoid the landlord.

[Andrew]

That's absolutely right.

[Luke Burbank]

If you take the elevator, it'll let you out. And you're ducking the landlord because there's just like every time you open your door, there's a new notice on your door about late rent.

[Andrew]

That's right. But maybe, hopefully the guy with the saxophone will be out tonight just playing a little bit of blues under the moonlight.

[Luke Burbank]

We got to thank Mike Brehm, who's in Turlock, California, I believe. I'm guessing that what we just described is maybe the exact opposite of Mike Brehm's life there in Turlock.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I would hope so. I hope that Mike. Well, for himself.

[Luke Burbank]

To paraphrase the drop, things are going extremely well for Mike Brehm.

[Andrew]

Hey, can I ask a question really quickly? So this. I'm sorry that Turlock made me think of this. That's a bad connotation. I apologize to Mike, but just forget why I'm bringing this up right now or why Turlock made me think of this. But let me ask you a question. What is the first thing you think of when you hear the word hemlock?

[Luke Burbank]

The society.

[Andrew]

Really? What is the Hemlock Society?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, Andrew, I know this is what Carmen Cespetus in Brooklyn, New York. Hey, Carmen, what up? This is what Carmen was hoping would be the lead in to us thanking Carmen. I believe the Hemlock Society pushes for people to be able to choose end of life for themselves.

[Andrew]

Okay, see, I didn't know that was a society. But I do think of it as like hemlock, like, going back to even. Like, even Shakespearean times. Right. Hemlock was sort of a. It was known as a poison plant. Right. Like hemlock. The first. The reason I ask is because I was somewhere in Seattle, very near, I believe. I think I was like, in my neighborhood. Although I can't remember exactly where I was yesterday or the day before with Genevieve. And I saw a sign for some, I think, newish apartments that were. They had a little sign out advertising, you know, get your apartment at Hemlock Apartments. Whoa. And I was like, why are we naming our. You know, like, it's kind of a nice word. And I said to Veeves, I'm like, why would you name it Hemlock? She's like, well, it's a plant. I'm like, I know it's a plant, but so is poison ivy. I wouldn't name my new apartment building poison ivy. Why is there hemlock apartments? I don't understand why you would choose that. It seems ominous.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I 100% think of it as being a poison that you could take. Yeah. And clearly whoever named that apartment building was not aware of that connotation. I wonder if that's an age thing or something. How old?

[Andrew]

You mean, like young? You mean, like, you're so young? Oh, interesting. I'm looking it up. I'm trying to see where the Hemlock apartments are. You know, I think the sign. Maybe I saw a sign in our neighborhood, but maybe they're more in the Greenwood neighborhood. I'm exactly sure. But they actually look, you know, they look nice. The nice modern looking apartments, at least on their website, of course, putting their best foot forward. But I'm just very confused how they chose that.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I would 100% think of the. Think of the Hemlock the way you do and would not name my apartment building that, nor would I name my apartment building. What would be some of the other. What are the other things that people famously. What do they. What do they put in. Is it like somebody put something in Romeo or Juliet's ear?

[Andrew]

Oh, yeah. Looking it up now. I'm also seeing that they have a little rumpus room with some air hockey tables. If maybe we should. Luke, will you move into the Hemlock Apartments with me? This really turned around very quickly. I'll say. I'll say. If it had a normal name, I wouldn't have looked it up, and I wouldn't be considering upending my life. I'm looking up the. The poison now. It's a potion, but I don't know if it says what kind it is. I apologize.

[Luke Burbank]

I wonder how many people, when they see the Hemlock apartments, have the thought that you and I have. I bet you it's. It's a lot.

[Andrew]

I would hope, but I would. I would. Well, I guess I would hope because I want people to. To know. But anyway, they look very, very nice. So sorry for disparaging them.

[Luke Burbank]

Thank you so much to all of our donors for supporting tbt. We could not do this show without you.

[Andrew]

They have papa shot. Sorry. No, no, that was important. No, no, just let it roll. I was gonna say they. They have air hockey on one side of the room, but then I just saw another view, and they have pop a shot, which seems like something that would appeal to you. Can you see me playing air hockey and you popping a shot over here?

[Luke Burbank]

Absolutely. No, I totally would. I don't see. Here's the thing. I don't know if I see you. How do I say this without. I'm not trying to paint you as, like, a recluse, but I do think there would be a certain amount of socializing in that game room that I don't know if that totally connects with, like, your favorite way to spend an evening.

[Andrew]

You think There's a lot of socializing I've been in. I feel like whenever you're staying at a place that has, like, a game room like this, it's usually a ghost town, don't you think?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, generally. And I. I don't generally, you know, mess with that stuff. I was very into air hockey as a kid and foosball. I think I've told you this story before, but, like, my buddy Peter Williams had a. Like a legit foosball table. And we would play these. These games where it would be, you know, you'd play to whatever the. You know, the little scoring thing that you can kind of keep track of the score.

[Andrew]

That's the best part. The slider.

[Luke Burbank]

The little slider things. So we would play a game which would be, you know, you had to score up to whatever. The slider would let you 10 points. Let's say that would be one game, and then it'd be best out of seven, but then that would be one set, and then it'd be best out of seven sets.

[Andrew]

So this would be just go on all night.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, hours. Like, we'd be playing, like, foosball for seven, eight hours. And the stakes were, if I won, it meant Jesus Christ was real, and if you won, it meant Meher Baba was real, which was this, like, a lot sort of this guru that his dad is a. Is a sort of follower of. And the funny thing was, if I was right and Christianity was the real thing, it meant that Peter and his whole family were going into eternal hell. And if he won and he was right and Maribaba was actually truly the one who was divine. I was fine anyway, because he was a very chill guy. You know what I mean?

[Andrew]

That never occurred to your friend that he was really getting the short end of the season?

[Luke Burbank]

I think he pointed it out at some point. He was like, you know, if I win, we all win. And if you win, I'm really screwed.

[Andrew]

Yeah, that's pretty, that's, that's pretty rough. I got to say, I've never, never thought I'd say this before, but I'm, I'm glad you just gamble for money now.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. No. The stakes were far too high for a couple of 12 year olds.

[Andrew]

Hello and welcome to Top Story.

[Luke Burbank]

So I have seen this story, Andrew, like perched atop the most read list of the New York Times articles for the longest time. And I never actually clicked on it, but it just, it sort of, it outlasted me. So here I am. The headline, Colin Jost and Pete Davidson and the Staten Island Fairy Fiasco. This is a really well written piece by Stephen Kurutz in the New York Times. It explains why this has been one of the most read pieces in the Times for a long time. Had you seen this, had you heard anything about this?

[Andrew]

I don't think so. I saw it in the show sheet today and I think that's the first time I saw it and I started reading it. I didn't get it done before we started talking, but. Well, you go. I'll just tell you later what my favorite little joke of this whole thing is.

[Luke Burbank]

I bet you I already know what it is.

[Andrew]

I mean, it's pretty obvious. It's right there in the name. I just like what they named their company, but go ahead.

[Luke Burbank]

I was thinking of something else.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I don't think I probably, I didn't make it that far to the piece, so you go ahead and set it up.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, so Pete Davidson and Colin Jost are both from Staten island and they both grew up taking the Staten island ferry, which by the way, I cannot recommend highly enough. If you ever come here to New York, it's free. You get to see the Statue of Liberty. You could see Lower Manhattan. You, you know, come take the State line ferry, go over, have lunch on Staten island, come back. It's a really, really fun thing to do.

[Andrew]

I didn't know.

[Luke Burbank]

It used to be, anyway.

[Andrew]

No, I, I know. I'm not questioning you. I'm just. That's interesting. I mean, there's so much. I'm seriously not trying to get political here, but there's so much Talk about free public transportation, specifically in the New York mayoral election that is going right today. That I didn't. I didn't know that this famous ferry that people take for entertainment purposes as well is free. So I guess we do have some free public transportation. I think that's awesome.

[Luke Burbank]

So Pete Davidson and Colin Jost grew up taking this thing, you know, all the time as kids to come into the city, etc. So they've, you know, they're both kind of interested in it, and I guess, you know, whichever. I don't know if it's the city of. City of New York or. Or the state of New York, but basically this. This ferry, the. The John F. Kennedy is what it was named, had reached the end of its useful life, I guess. It's the Department of Citywide Administrative Services. They're in charge of. Of basically getting rid of stuff. And so they think that usually the scrap value of a Staten island ferry is somewhere between $60,000 and a hundred thousand dollars. So the guy who's in charge, the city employee who's in charge of basically putting this thing up for auction, his name's Larry Siegel. He thought, well, you know, this is a Staten island ferry. It's kind of iconic. I'm going to just put it out at 250, $250,000 and just see if anyone bites. But he also very wisely started kind of putting out feelers. I guess he was, like, tweeting @NBC or he was trying to. Maybe somebody was tweeting on his behalf to NBC. People were trying to somehow get this ferry auction on the radar of Pete Davidson and Colin Jost. And somehow, amazingly, it sort of worked, because when the ferry was coming up for. For auction, when it was the day of the auction, all of a sudden there were, like, a bunch of bids on it in a way that was not the normal thing. I think the guy said. The guy who was running the auction said something to the effect of, like, basically we had. What did he say? I'm trying to find the. I'm trying to find the exact quote from him. Basically, like, oh, yeah. He said, we have breached the scrap metal industry was what Mr. Siegel noticed when there was a flurry of bids from new accounts, he said, oh, I thought, oh, this is different. We have breached the scrap metal industry. Now, the name that was attached to these bids was a guy named Paul Italia, and he is the owner of a Manhattan comedy club, the Stand. And so this guy Siegel, who was putting this thing up for. For sale when he discovered that Mr. Italia was a co owner of a Manhattan comedy club. He worried the whole thing might be a practical joke. But the purchase was neither practical nor a joke.

[Andrew]

It's a good line.

[Luke Burbank]

That's my favorite part of the piece. This guy, Mr. Italia, he's part of this, this group that includes Colin Jost and Pete Davidson and some guy named Ron Castellano, who's a New York architect. And they bought this thing. I think they paid like $250,000 for this Staten island ferry, which does not have a working engine, which costs I think way more than $10,000 a month to just like sort of where it's currently docked because it's. They can't find anyone to work on it. Their plan is they want to turn it into like a, like a venue, like, you know, like a performance space where you could have concerts and a couple of bars or whatever.

[Andrew]

Sounds cool. Yeah. They said like six bars, a performance space. I don't know if there's more than one performance space on there, but like a whole, like just a whole floating venue, which actually it sounds awesome. If, if not practical.

[Luke Burbank]

It's apparently not practical at all because they can't find anyone to fix it. It's costing them now. They think that they've spent like $600,000 on store on docking it. So they've now far outspent the cost of the thing. They also right now can't even sell it for scrap because the price of scrap metal has dropped so much. And the only place that you can get this thing scrapped is in Mobile, Alabama. And to tow it to Mobile, Alabama costs more than it's worth in scrap. They're going to have to potentially pay somebody $50,000. They're going to lose $50,000 on getting this thing scrapped if they decide to scrap it. And every interview they've done, they have basically said this was the stupidest idea. It seems to be the only thing they're getting asked about now anywhere they go. Pete Davidson and Colin Jost and also Colin Jost is married to Scarlett Johansson. She's now getting asked about it in interviews. She is totally, she's totally mystified by the whole thing. So it seems like this was a very, very a. This is the kind of thing I would do if I had any money.

[Andrew]

Yes. And it's.

[Luke Burbank]

And it's turning out about how it would if I bought the state a Staten island fair.

[Andrew]

Except you wouldn't tell Scarlett Johansson. That'd be a fun surprise surprise for, for later. I didn't know that these. This is going to sound absolutely crazy, but, like, I kind of didn't know that these guys were buddies. I always remember that weekend update with John Mulaney and Pete Davidson. And so I always think of those two as paling around, but I kind of. This is a very uninteresting observation about this story, but I just kind of like knowing that they're friends and that they just decided to do this as a couple of rich guys.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, literally. I believe it was Pete Davidson texting Colin Jost going, hey, should we do this? And then when Pete Davidson was asked about it later, he was like, look, we got stoned. We bought a boat. It's fine. And then Colin Jost had to clarify that he was. And he said, this is more embarrassing. He was completely sober when he decided to buy the boat. He didn't like Pete Davidson telling everyone that he was high when he bought the boat because he was not high. But that's more embarrassing than being high and buying the boat.

[Andrew]

Right. Have you ever claimed to be under the influence of alcohol when you actually weren't just a cover for your actions? I don't think I have.

[Luke Burbank]

Quite the opposite.

[Andrew]

But I feel like I've gotten close.

[Luke Burbank]

Quite the opposite. The other thing, as you alluded to, is that they named their company. The company that owns this boat is called Titanic 2, which is just.

[Andrew]

I really think it's funny. They're like, oh, well, what should we name it? Titanic 2. This is when they think it's going to be a successful business venture. Right. We'll buy a boat. We'll make it this huge floating venue that can host, like, 3,000 people at a time. And what should we name the company? Oh, I know. Titanic 2. And now they're being sued by their own law firm for apparently. Or for allegedly not paying their. Their bills, their legal fees. And so they're being sued by their own law firm. And who's being sued but the company Titanic too. And when you read that in, like, legalese, it's. It's quite funny.

[Luke Burbank]

It's great. Nobody ever sue two Beautiful to biz, please. But it's a similar situation, sir. We are suing two Beautiful two Biz. What is that exactly? It's a podcast. Speaking of Titanic two, Colin Jost told Seth Meyers that apparently it was impossible to get the boat and get the project insured. It was very difficult because the company is named Titanic 2.

[Andrew]

Oh, yeah, sure.

[Luke Burbank]

Like, their insurance companies were like, it's called Titanic 2. We're going to pass on this one.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

So anyway, I, I like this story because. Well, first of all, I'm with you. I like them being friends and I like knowing that other people are out there making incredibly irresponsible decisions around boats the way that I so famously have done in my own life.

[Andrew]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

The other story that you actually sent me that I thought was pretty interesting involved this Louvre robbery of late, which, by the way, not that I was exactly like going out on a limb, but I'm kind of proud of that. When we talked about the story the first time, I said they're gonna catch these guys because there's too much DNA around. And then like, I feel like two days later they were like, they've caught five of the guys because there was too much DNA around.

[Andrew]

Oh, did they actually get the DNA? I did not know. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

I feel like a real modern day Dennis Franz. I feel like a real modern day Sipowitz. Just trying to work in as many Sipowitz references as I can today. Yeah, they, they, they got some DNA and they were able to link them. Link the DNA to some of these folks who they. It's the Europe. So they haven't identified any of them by name, but they've talked about the group and that none of them had. None of them like worked at the Louvre. As they can tell. They weren't part of organized crime. You know, one of the other thing that's kind of weird to me or surprising was, you know who called 911 on the whole thing was a cyclist who was just riding by the Louvre, saw these people in these construction outfits on this big lift, like, ladder thing, which, by the way, they stole that through like a Craigslist ad. Did you hear that part of the story?

[Andrew]

No, I really have not been following this story very closely at all. I don't know why I did see this one dazzling, deep that. We'll get to that I sent you yesterday. But no, this is all fascinating to me. So I didn't know that his cyclist was the one that had. The cyclist saw something that was amiss when he saw these people in yellow vests going down the staircase. You're going to get some hop on style.

[Luke Burbank]

I guess so because it wasn't the. This is pointed out as one of the many security failings at the Louvre. It wasn't the louvre that called 911 first. It was a cyclist who saw these people coming out of the Louvre with stuff and thought, that doesn't really look like that should be happening.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Did we already talk about the Fact, though, I feel like maybe we did. And again, this is sort of the obvious. Probably the obvious joke from, like, two or three weeks ago, but it really does sort of make you think, so if I just get one of those yellow vests, I can. It really unlocks a lot of doors for you. Like, those bright yellow can. You know, whether it's like you associate with construction workers, but you just. Like, you can just. I mean, it's like the classic heist scene from any kind of a heist movie. You just like, well, let's get in this van and all come out and pretend we're painters. Right. But the modern equivalent of that is wearing one of these fluorescent vests.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, I'm mildly surprised that a cyclist thought something was amiss.

[Andrew]

Me too. I wouldn't.

[Luke Burbank]

I feel like I would have just gone by, and I would have been like, they have vests on.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

They're allowed to do whatever they're doing.

[Andrew]

Exactly. Exactly. Who am I to question that?

[Luke Burbank]

Apparently, they stole the, like, ladder truck thingy. They. They found, like, a. It's not Craigslist, but whatever they have in France. They went and acted like they were gonna buy this thing someone was selling, and then they stole it, and they drove it to the Louvre. Yeah. Which is also pretty. Kind of genius for me, a little bit.

[Andrew]

I can't. I can't get arrested development out of my head today as I'm picturing this thing.

[Luke Burbank]

You're gonna get.

[Andrew]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

So they went to the Louvre with this thing, obviously, and then they. They, like, broke their way in and got all this stuff, and. And now there's all this. You know, there's basically a big inquiry into, like, why was the Louvre not more protected? I mean, to be honest with you, it seemed like it was. Okay. It was somewhat protected to me. Like, here's what I mean. They did have to break through the windows, and then they had to break into these cases. Like, it isn't like they just left the front door unlocked and all these jewels and. And whatever tiaras and things were just sitting out on, like, on someone's desk to be stolen. Like, I don't know how much more secure, like, the windows are supposed to be, but it seems to me like what you had was some people who very brazenly, physically broke into the building. Physically broke into the. The displays. Physically took the stuff. I mean, maybe the displays could have been, like, under more bulletproof glass or something. But it's weird to me that this is a story of, like, the security is so bad they're like, are you. Should you have armed guards there in case a heist crew breaks in? And then what, you shoot them or something? Like, I don't really know what more they were supposed to do, but as part of this inquiry, they've been looking at the cyber security, if you will, of this place. And one of the things that they just pointed out in this recent study was the password to log into the Louvre security cameras was Louv.

[Andrew]

Not even. Not even with an exclamation point or anything. Yeah, or 1, 2, 3, question mark. Anything. Like, how come I can't even maintain my MLB at Bat subscription without them updating my password or forcing me to update my password every three months? That literally just happened to me. How did they get away with just calling it Louv and not, like, every month?

[Luke Burbank]

Question.

[Andrew]

You need to update this now.

[Luke Burbank]

That is what I am. That's what I'm really fascinated by in this whole story is how in the world were they not? How is it not like Louvre, 1, 2, 3, exclamation point. I hate you.

[Andrew]

The A is the symbol. Exactly. Adding to it, you add to it. You add to it every time it forces you to update it.

[Luke Burbank]

I have this one online bank that is where, like, my CBS paychecks go for some reason. And I set this up years and years ago. It was a huge mistake. But I don't really know how to log back into CBS and get them to send my direct deposit to a different bank account. So I've maintained this bank account for this one thing. And what it means is I have to go. And every week I have to go in. Do you hear that horn?

[Andrew]

Yeah. Is that just one? I don't know if our listeners are gonna be able to hear because I'm listening with headphones right now, but is that just one angry driver? Just lean the horn for, like, 15.

[Luke Burbank]

That is one. Jack Lemon writing names down in a book.

[Andrew]

I just. Again, I don't know if I. Listen, if you. If you rewind and blast it, you might be able to hear it the background. But, yeah, I just heard an uninterrupted horn from a car going on for a long time. Like, enough to be like, probably worth, I don't know, $4 million in ad space during the Super Bowl.

[Luke Burbank]

And doing absolutely no good. Like that is, you know, in Princess Bride when they're able to find Wesley because he is being tortured, but he's screaming. And I think it's like Inigo Montoya says, what does he say, Hun? It's like, that is the sound of a man who's lost his true love or something. Like, there's just something about the way he screams that is like. It's a different sort of property or quality.

[Andrew]

That's right. That's how they find his location, because they can hear that bellow coming from underground into the. Into the woods. Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

And that person laying on their horn, that was the sound of a person who's truly lost it.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Because there's no way. It wasn't notifying anybody of anything. It wasn't like, hey, I'm trying to get through this intersection. That was just. That was somebody who's, as the kids say, crashing out.

[Andrew]

That was somebody who was cut off in traffic and was like, well, you know what? I'm gonna make your life as uncomfortable as possible by just laying. I don't know this from any experience. I'm just saying that I can imagine. Maybe that's what's going through that person. Person's head.

[Luke Burbank]

100%. Speaking of crashing out. So this is what's going on with me in this bank every week. And by the way, I'll mention them because I want people to not use them. They're called Axos, and for some reason, every single time I try to log in, it tells me that I have the wrong password. And the only way to fix this is to set up a new password. Like, I have to go through the I forgot my password function every single week, 52 weeks out of the year. Because what I do is I get paid weekly from cbs. I go into this account, and then I transfer the money out of this account into my regular bank account. But every week, I have to go in and act like I forgot my password and establish a new password so I can go in, so I can transfer this little money out of my account. But it's also one of those things that's like, you can't use the same password. You can't use a password that you've used before. So I'm running out of passwords. And the other thing is, you have to be able to remember it. You can't just, like, punch it in and then hit go. You punch it in, hit go. It accepts it, then it re. Then you have to re log in and use that password. So it has to be something that I can kind of remember. And what it basically involves is me writing the most hateful things about this bank into password form. It's the most creative permutations of the F word of the fu. Fu. Axos. Bank. I hate you. Ex Axos Bank. It's like, I don't know if these are being stored somewhere and if people can. If the bank could decode them, but I wouldn't be surprised for the FBI to show up at my house. Sir, you've been threatening real harm to this bank by way of your password that you write. Because again, it can't be something I've used before. I have to be able to remember it. And I'm angry at the bank when I'm making the new password.

[Andrew]

I shouldn't. There are several reasons why I should not tell the anecdote that I'm about to tell. One, just for my own Internet security and telling people what a password, what a password I used was, and also because I don't want to say anything that would embarrass or imperil your brother in any way, but remember when your brother was on TBTL a couple of weeks ago, telling a really great story about how Dan Wilson came into the restaurant that he works at? Yeah. Right before. Was it. Was it right before game five? That's right. It was right before game five. Right. Of the lds. Anyway, but we also took a moment, and I was pretty outraged just to, like, really consider how much your brother works the insane schedule that he has to have to do that job at the radio station, getting in at two in the morning or whatever it is, but then also to have to have a second job just to make ends meet when he has an incredibly important journalistic job at one of the city's important news and information stations. And that's not enough to. To, you know, just live on. And I was so mad. And then later on, literally later on that day, I was trying to use that same company's app to listen to the pregame show, and they would not let me stream live without giving my personal information and setting up an account, which is like, really ridiculous. Like, it's free, but, like, to listen to my local streaming radio station, I had to, like, sign in and, like, create a password. And I was so mad that I made my password wage theft in honor of your brother. And it's like, I don't think they actually have access to that. I should have made my law. I should have made my first name wage and my second name theft or something like that, because they'll never know. But it was just like, talk about the most impotent little jab, like, kind of jab at somebody they'll never even know. But in the moment, I was like, what's my password. I'll tell you what my password is. Wage theft. Let's pay. David.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right. I like that you were going to bat for my brother.

[Andrew]

I appreciate that in a very effective way. Here I go once again with the email. Every week I hope that it's from a female.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, man, it's not from a female.

[Andrew]

All right.

[Luke Burbank]

Emails or V mails?

[Andrew]

Yeah, I got a voicemail here. A voice memo, actually, that April recorded and emailed to me. AndrewBtl.net or you can call our voicemail line at 206-414-8285. That's 206-414-TBTL speaking of frustrating technology, Luke, this is not password related, but you and I have been talking about, as has everybody, AI a lot lately. My whole thing about AI is that it's being forced upon us, yet it has not proven its value. I think it's proven its value in some behind the scenes applications. But my God, this push to get all of us to force AI into our life is so frustrating. Especially because it don't work, Luke. And you know who learned that recently? Listener April.

[April]

Hello, this is April in the Arby's district of Edmonds. I just couldn't help but share my incredulity at what AI can and cannot do. I work for an education nonprofit and I do development, so I do a ton of grant writing. And grant applications are super, super annoying and that they all have different word limits, character count limits, things like that. So I'm always trying to, like, tailor text to exactly what that funder needs. So I was like, okay, look, I have, you know, whatever, 900 words to answer this question. I need it to be 500 words. What a perfect use for AI, right? We're always getting pushed at work to use AI more, even though I hate it. So I was like, great. AI can absolutely do that. It's counting words or characters. How hard can that be? Couldn't do it. I put it in there, asked it to shorten. It was like, here you go. This is 497 words. I put it back in Google Docs. I was like, oh, that seems long. Count it. It's 700. I got into an Andrew like argument where I kept saying, this is actually this many words. And it would be like, oh, I'm so sorry. How embarrassing. Here, I'll do it again. Did it again. Still wrong. I went back and forth with, I think I was using Gemini an embarrassing number of times trying to get it to figure it out. I don't Know, how can AI not be able to count words or characters? I just. I do not understand. It finally was like, I guess I can't do this. I'll have to try again next time or something. I mean, something ridiculous. And I basically stomped out a little bit like you, Andrew. So anyway, power out.

[Andrew]

When you're comparing yourself to me twice in a situation like this, things are not going well for you. I hate to say that I was.

[Luke Burbank]

Wondering how you feel about that being your brand.

[Andrew]

Well, I'm worried about both me and April, to be honest with you, in this situation, but, yeah, that is. That is infuriating. The only thing that I've learned from my few interactions with AI is AI is good at apologizing for being useless because it's always just like, well, oh, yeah, sorry, I guess I can't do that. Well, yep, sorry, I guess. I guess I can't know which players are actually injured and which ones aren't on your fantasy football team, even though those are just facts that should be available to you as you synthesize this information that you're supposedly.

[Luke Burbank]

So I find those stories encouraging because it just means as long as they need someone to count words, I've still got a job. Yeah, potentially.

[Andrew]

You're. You're the word counter. We got this.

[Luke Burbank]

You know what I mean? Like, yeah, Yeah. I look for stories where AI is. Is not up to the task because it feels like it's ever so slightly delaying the. The inevitable. Speaking of, by the way, AI and things like that, did you hear about that Waymo that killed a cat?

[Andrew]

No.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. Like it. This is a sad story. I should have probably given a trigger warning, but there was, like, I think it was in San Francisco. There was, like, a beloved neighborhood cat that was hit by a Waymo. And like, it's honestly that made me so upset that now I. I was a big Waymo fan. I may, like, I may not use Waymos anymore because of that one incident that's really.

[Andrew]

So this is the first I'm hearing about this. And so all I know is what you've told me, and so I shouldn't say anything, but I won't stop there. I guess my question is, and you know how much I care about cats and how much I don't care about Waymo. I mean, I would. I don't have an opinion on Waymo one way or the other one. Waymo or the other. But I mean, this also happens with humans behind the wheels of cars a lot too. So I don't know the story I don't know if they're. I mean, obviously it's supposed to have functionality that would prevent that from happening. But also, as humans, we're not supposed to do that either. But I do know. You know what I mean? Like, maybe, right. Cars in general shouldn't be on the roads, you know, and I'm actually half joking about that.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I was in San Francisco's Mission District and it was a. A beloved, like, cat that like, lived in a deli or something named KitKat. Oh, I know. Really sad. But you are right. Like in a certain way, I don't really understand how the driverless nature of the car, it's interesting, but I don't know how like, relevant it is because like you said, unfortunately, cars that are operated by humans sometimes hit animals. So, you know, and I, I'm assuming again, not to defend Waymo, but it's like, I'm assuming that it's everything built into it is supposed to make it as safe as a human driver. So it's like, yeah, there's, you know, accidents will happen, but I don't know, they're trying to. Of course, now in San Francisco, there's a city supervisor that's actually trying to get the rules changed around sort of of driverless vehicles because of this, which I guess, you know, if you're looking for an opening politically, this is probably a pretty good one. Maybe short of a child getting hit, this is probably going to tug at the heartstrings.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Again, I don't want to dismiss this. That's absolutely heartbreaking. And anything that we can do and advocate for that makes these cars and all cars safer to humans, to cats, to pets, to whatever, like, we should do that. But I would just. Without having read this story, I'd be interested in knowing like, kind of what the trend lines are and stuff, because I would still assume that, that even proportionally, there's still a greater chance of a human killing a pet with a car than. Than these, I'm. I'm guessing, at least historically.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, Like, I don't want to. Seriously, I don't want to be like, you know, siding with the tech bros. Me neither. But I, but I'm get my, my sense is that, yeah, these cars. And again, I've ridden in them now a bunch of times. They've got them in la too. They're actually my preferred thing in LA now for getting around for a bunch of reasons. But like, they don't strike me as any more unsafe than a car that's being driven by A human being with all of the things that we as humans do imperfectly. So anyway, when are we going to.

[Andrew]

Get a self driving E line is what I want to know.

[Luke Burbank]

That's what you need, buddy.

[Andrew]

I heard as a kicker story at the end of like the actual newscast on. You know, I can never remember, Luke, what the new name of like what como Radio used to be here. It's like Northwest News now or whatever, but for people who are unfamiliar, it's not really a talk station where everybody's like blow hardened with their opinions. It's pretty much like your classic AM news station with like a news wheel and weather and traffic and all those things. And the problem is though that you always have a kicker story at the end and then people are trying to banter and they're not great at bantering. What I. It was, it was your old friend Jeff Pojola and anchor. Yeah, and honestly, like I've heard whatever. Pojo hosts a political show that is actually not so bad. But I heard some, some pretty rough banter on like Friday night or whatever. And it was around the kicker story or one of the things was about self flying. Not self flying, but flying cars. Apparently Musk is out here now saying that he's going to introduce a flying car by the end of 2026. I don't really have much to say about that, so I don't know why I raised it. I guess I'm just thinking about the. These autonomous vehicles and whatnot. As long as his name is.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, that's one of the things is a lot of the new. A lot of the new like, like flying things that are sort of giant drones and like personal aircraft. They're also autonomous. And I feel like that's the one I'm gonna need to see some. I'm gonna see a long track record of that thing not wigging out before I get on one. Can you imagine getting in to something that's gonna fly you somewhere and it's also autonomous. That would be like, that's. I feel like the fear factor of that has got to be pretty high for people.

[Andrew]

Especially when you think about the jack holes who are behind this stuff and they care about profit above all else.

[Luke Burbank]

One guy's trying to live to be a thousand. The other guy is talking about the Antichrist and trying to, you know, rig American politics. I would trust them with my life.

[Andrew]

Yeah, right.

[Luke Burbank]

And they're flying autonomous helicopter.

[Andrew]

Exactly. You know what, I'm just going to keep walking to sars, Luke. The way. God, there you go.

[Luke Burbank]

Keep it simple, buddy.

[Andrew]

That's right.

[Luke Burbank]

I didn't say keep it simple stupid because you're not stupid. All right, everybody, that's going to do it for today's episode but I have incredible news. We are going to be right back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you. So please do join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Tuesday. Get out and vote if you haven't. If you're somewhere where voting happens and and enjoy the rest of your day with the pride of knowing that you participated in the civic process. I was once a skeptic of voting famously on this show, Andrew. That's how far I've come.

[Andrew]

Did you vote my life? Did you vote before you left?

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know if there was anything in Washington. Good luck to you all.

[Andrew]

No mountain too tall and good luck to all. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Enjoy New York.

[April]

Power out.