#4626 I'm Workin' Here!

Summary

TBTL Episode #4626 "I'm Workin' Here!"

Date: December 24, 2025
Hosts: Luke Burbank & Andrew Walsh

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Episode Overview

On this festive Christmas Eve episode of TBTL, Luke and Andrew lean into the coziness of the holiday season with nostalgic stories, discussions about the quirks of modern life (from digital check deposits to high-tech bidet toilets), and a listener-submitted list of the top five best walks one can take. Their meandering, irreverent banter is in full effect, bringing a blend of relatable, warm humor and random practical advice—from managing receipts to choosing the right wax ring for your toilet.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Holiday Gifting… with a $0 Budget

• The episode opens with the hosts joking about a gift exchange, but the maximum spend is $0, leading to a playful riff on creativity.
  • Luke: “Creativity, to me, is just like... like a friendly bird that embraces all ideas, just, like, shoots out of its eyes, all kinds of beauty.” (00:16)

2. Nostalgia for Obsolete Tasks: Checks & Bank Visits

• Andrew waxes nostalgic about the bygone days of paper checks, bank visits, and the satisfying destruction of checks after digital deposit.
• Both recount their evolving levels of trust with mobile check deposits and reluctance to discard paper checks (“It took me years to trust the hashtag process…” — Luke, 05:16).

3. Sitcom Life Lessons & Receipt Anxiety

• Andrew reflects on early sitcoms (such as "Cheers" and "Mary Tyler Moore") that instilled a lingering, irrational fear of audits and the need to hoard receipts.
  • “All I knew from watching media like that was that if you don’t do things right, somebody from the government could knock on your door unexpectedly and say, where’s your shoebox full of receipts?” — Andrew (06:08)
• Luke details his father’s compulsive receipt-keeping tendencies and manual hoarding habits.

4. DIY Toilet Installation & Bidet Confessions

• The hosts take a deep dive into modern toilet technology, recounting their personal tales of installing bidets and debates over the merits of the classic wax toilet ring.
• Luke admits his family is intimidated by his “Casa de Diva” bidet, resulting in guests seeking out the more traditional toilets in his home.
• Andrew expresses discomfort sharing bidet functions, finding it “a little too close to someone else’s hoo-ha,” and coins the phrase: “You hose nozzle!” (11:35)
• They both discuss the practical realities and emotional satisfaction of replacing fixtures and the relief of solving household disasters before company arrives.

5. Donor Shout-Outs and Listener Community

• The show’s characteristic community spirit shines as they thank donors, share inside jokes (like Scotty’s unwavering karaoke song “Teenage Dirtbag”), and reminisce about shared experiences.
• Geographic tidbits, like the history of Longview, Washington and its pivotal “Monticello Convention,” are woven in for local flavor (25:32).

6. Top Five Walks—Listener Sarah’s Holiday List (see Timestamps: 30:00–47:18)

The heart of the episode: Sarah’s top-five list of life’s best walks, which sparks expert-level banter and listener identification.

Sarah’s List (and Host Commentary):

• #5: Walk to kill time with a good companion (or a chatty four-year-old)

  • Andrew: “I always try to make a lot of noise so that they know that I’m behind them… especially if it’s nighttime.” (34:49)
  • Luke reflects fondly on his daughter's inquisitive "why" phase during walks.

• #4: Early spring walk when the world reawakens—seasonal depression melting away.

  • Luke: “It sort of fixes something inside me that gets broken about this time of year and continues to be broken until, I don’t know, we get that first nice week in April or May.” (35:37)
  • Andrew prefers the melancholy joy of a crisp fall walk with fallen chestnuts.

• #3: Braving the cold—a walk that starts too chilly, but soon feels invigorating.

  • Advice: “Dress for the second mile.” (37:41, Andrew quoting a classic TBTL story)
  • The hosts riff on the joy of donning a good scarf and their evolving criteria for purchasing accessories (in-store vs. online).

• #2: Revisiting an old haunt—walking familiar ground a decade later, preferably with someone who shares the nostalgia (or someone to bore with “that used to be a laundromat!”).

  • Luke: “Not only will I comment extensively on what is different, I’ll comment on what isn’t different.” (43:33)

• #1: Exploring somewhere entirely new, destined for a simple reward (like coffee or a bakery).

  • Andrew: “When I was visiting Boston for the first time, it was very important for me not to look like a tourist…”

BONUS:

Luke adds a “1A”: The transformative moment when an unfamiliar neighborhood starts to feel like home after a couple days’ exploration.

7. Bonus: Top Five Underrated Smells (48:00)

• Sarah’s quick hit-list: printer paper, pickles, ivory soap, apples, and a hot clothing iron.
• Inspired, Luke and Andrew add their own favorites: gasoline, distant cigarette smoke (“I’m like a shark… that’s me, if someone lit a cigarette right now in Tacoma, I would be able to smell it.” — Luke, 50:17).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Luke on trust in technology:

  “It took me years to trust the hashtag process because it does feel... still feels crazy and new to me and does seem... rife with... skullduggery.” (05:17)

• Andrew’s sitcom anxieties:

  “Somebody from the government could knock on your door unexpectedly and say, where's your shoebox full of receipts?” (06:08)

• Luke defending high-tech toilets:

  “I guess I just assumed everyone would be stoked about getting to wash their hindquarters... But I know there is a little bit of a barrier to entry.” (10:05)

• On letting go of manuals and receipts:

  “I went over and I just put my hands on his shoulders and I said, there, there, there. No one can hurt you now.” (16:29)

• Walking pace anxieties:

  “I really hate it when someone is walking exactly the same pace as us, but like four steps behind us. I don't know what primal fear that is...” — Luke (33:20)

• Memory-lane walks:

  “That used to be a laundromat. Wow. Crazy they didn’t change that sign. Oh my gosh, I’ve literally said those words...” (43:08)

• Sarah’s pick for underrated smell:

  “Luke Irons getting hot; that is... very comforting, right?” (48:29)

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Timestamps of Important Segments

| Time | Segment Description | |-------|------------------------------------------------------| | 00:00 | Holiday banter & creative $0 gift exchange | | 02:04 | Connecting with listeners, setting up "top walks" | | 02:45 | Paper checks, bank nostalgia, digital deposits | | 05:45 | Life lessons from sitcoms & receipt hoarding | | 07:44 | Toilet installation and old-school plumbing tech | | 09:00 | Bidet adventures & guests’ bathroom preferences | | 13:03 | “Casa de Diva” bidet woes and wax ring mishaps | | 14:47 | Father’s obsession with receipts and manuals | | 16:29 | Letting go of paper manuals in the digital age | | 17:33 | The existential joy/surprise of replacing a toilet | | 18:00 | Dumping the old toilet at the landfill | | 21:18 | Donor thanks—community stories & in-jokes | | 25:32 | Longview, WA history, Monticello Convention | | 30:00 | Top Five Walks—Listener Sarah’s List (Main Segment) | | 33:32 | Walk pacing anxieties | | 35:15 | Spring walks and their emotional impact | | 37:41 | Braving the cold (“dress for the second mile”) | | 39:05 | Parking lots, scarves, and shopping strategies | | 42:40 | Urban planning rants (U Village, Seattle) | | 43:08 | Revisiting old neighborhoods—nostalgia walks | | 44:44 | Exploring new neighborhoods on foot | | 47:57 | Cozy Seattle walk memory & setting holiday moods | | 48:00 | Top Five Underrated Smells (quickfire) | | 51:06 | Episode wrap-up & teasers for Christmas Day special |

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Tone & Closing

Staying true to TBTL’s essence, the episode is filled with random detours, affectionate ribbing, and long-form digressions—making the listener feel like an insider in a private, winding conversation. The warmth and self-deprecation shine, carrying a low-key message about appreciating the ordinary: the walks, smells, and quirks of life (and plumbing).

Luke: “May all your walks be wonderful and full of amazing smells. Holiday season. Season.” (50:35)

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For Further Listening

Stay tuned for the Christmas Day special (51:17) and, as always, remember:

“No mountain too tall, and good luck to all.”

Transcript

[A]

Do you want to exchange Christmas presents this year? I would love to.

[B]

Great.

[A]

How about the most we can spend on each other's gifts is $0? Really? You want to exchange creative gifts? Oh, well, you are the one that's in trouble now, buddy, because creativity, to.

[B]

Me is just like.

[A]

Like a bird. Like a friendly bird that embraces all ideas, just, like, shoots out of its eyes, all kinds of beauty.

[B]

Wow, Lemon, this is like watching Hemingway, right?

[A]

Mark Hemingway.

[B]

Yeah. Tbtm. I'm so excited about this show. It is weird.

[A]

It is beautiful. It has a plot that goes in fascinating directions. It's so easy. All you do is point and click. But how does it work? All you need is a computer and a regular phone line. Well, with all due respect, I mean.

[B]

I hate to admit this, but, I mean, I don't think I've been online in, you know, a couple days or weeks or whatever. Something that's really not an important thing to me.

[A]

My face, your face, instant face.

[B]

Go.

[A]

Go talk to whoever you want that does that stuff.

[B]

I don't know what's on the website probably isn't going to be what's where.

[A]

It'S actually going to be.

[B]

Okay. A lot of times we will play like a Home Depot parking lot.

[A]

This is not your mama's podcast. This is too beautiful to live.

[B]

Well, all right.

[A]

Hello, good morning and welcome, everyone, to a Wednesday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Meet the next generation of podcast stars. My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host, Luke Burbank. In case you needed confirmation on that. There we go. Coming to you from the Madrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia, where the stockings are hung with care here on Christmas Eve day morning.

[B]

Is Santa here? I know him. I know him.

[A]

And we've made it, folks, to episode 4626 in a collector series.

[B]

Let the fun begin.

[A]

Got another list for you today submitted by one of the listeners from their real live.

[B]

We talk about you and your life.

[A]

Your hopes, your ambitions, your dreams, real life experiences. The top five walks that you can take. You know, the holidays, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day. Nothing like a nice little family walk. Get a little fresh air, walk off some of those cookies. We're gonna go through the list today with you and with this guy. He is the longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. Sometimes I call him the Andyman. Sometimes I call him the Miami Meat Tent. He answers to all of them, including Andrew Walsh, which is what we're going to use today. Good morning, my friend.

[B]

Good morning, Luke. Listen to this. This is a good feeling. This is a good sound and a good feeling right here. You know, this is. This is the modern sound of what you do to a paper check after you digitally deposit it. Young generations will never understand that when you got a check in the mail. Well, young generations don't understand what a check in the mail means. But remember, you get a check in the mail, you'd have to find a bank, take it to a bank, stand in line, talk to a teller who would fill out a deposit slip, remember, with one of those pens that is chained to a desk, and yeah. Figure out what your bank account number is.

[A]

Now we maybe go through the drive through and get that proxy pneumatic tube. I actually did that the other day. And what wonder they still have working.

[B]

Pneumatic tubes down there in Oregon.

[A]

Well, I'm in Southern Washington.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

What am I talking about? But. But yeah, they do at the. At the. What is. Which one was it? Oh, yeah, bank of America in Longview.

[B]

Wow, that's worth the trip right there. That is worth the trip. Did you get a lollipop sent your way at the end?

[A]

I don't think I did.

[B]

God, what is the point of the tube if it's not sending you a, you know. Yeah, lollipop.

[A]

Best candies, as we heard.

[B]

But do you do what I do now, which is like, it's so easy to deposit checks now on the occasion that you find yourself receiving a paper check, and maybe during the holiday season, people are receiving paper checks. You just take a photo of you from my grandmother.

[A]

Rest in power.

[B]

Do you still have them? Do you have some that, like, you never cash?

[A]

I don't, but I wonder what happens, you know, people that have got 100 checks for $5 from their grandmother, and then maybe, you know, grandmother is no longer with us. Better get those checks cashed real quick.

[B]

Do you. Once you deposit your checks using the mobile apps, is there a period where you're too scared to throw away the check? So you have to. So what I just did was I just logged into bank of America. I'm like, did that check I deposited a couple of weeks ago, did that clear? And then I saw it cleared for $75. I'm 7. If I sound $75 richer than I was yesterday, it's because opa. $75 richer than I was yesterday. I saw that it cleared. So I was able to take that check off of my desk, tear it up as you heard, and throw it away. And that feels like I did something. It feels like I crossed something off.

[A]

My to do list for many years after the advent of the, you know, taking a picture of your check. And that was all good. I could never even rip up the checks. I would just keep them, like, forever. Because I just felt like, I don't know, I was gonna need proof at some point.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think I've only recently now started actually ripping the checks up. Like it took me. It took me years to trust the hashtag process because it does feel. It still feels crazy and new to me and does seem on some level like it should be rife. Rife with, I don't know, malfeasance, skullduggery. But, you know, I guess. I guess it works. And it's keeps people out of the bank. So, you know, we'll go for it.

[B]

You know, while we're talking about lists on the show recently, I feel like I should put together a top five list. I have two I can share with you right now, which are gonna be retread. So I'll keep them quick. But I should put together a list of the top five episodes of sitcoms that I watched as a child that had an undue influence on the rest of my life. One of which would be something that came up on the show a couple of weeks ago when we were talking about Cheers and Robin Cold Corner Court. If I'm saying it, Cole Court, maybe. And the idea of a hidden money belt being somewhere. That was one weird episode of Cheers. I'd never heard the term money belt before, but the whole gang tears apart an apartment, I believe, and some other places looking for this supposed money belt filled with like a million dollars. And so ever since I saw that, I'll go around every time I'm in a hotel room, I'm looking around for a hidden money belt. The other one related to keeping checks and receipts forever was an episode of. Of okay, Mary Ty More where she's getting audited. And I'm sure we've talked about this before, because I think about it a lot. Like, I didn't know what an audit was. I don't think I fully understood the idea of the IRS or taxes. All I knew from watching media like that was that if you don't. If you don't do things right, somebody from the government could knock on your door unexpectedly and say, where's your shoebox full of receipts? And there's a little bit of me that. That still, like, kind of has that paranoia in me. I don't think that's how it works.

[A]

Couldn't be less shocked to hear that that's a concern for you as a. As a pretty detail oriented archivist. As a person who loves archiving and record keeping and file management. It was funny. A couple weeks ago, Walt and I were down at Home Depot and buying some supplies for the. The project here. And I forget what it was, but was it was you were buying an extra tall wax seal for putting the toilet down.

[B]

Oh, I thought you meant like a. Like a model seal, like the animal extra tall.

[A]

No, that would be pretty cool actually.

[B]

For the front.

[A]

No, like a wax ring that sits. It's kind of wild to me that that's still the technology. Have you ever installed a toilet?

[B]

Oh, yeah, I have. In fact, I think I had to do it twice. You just put down a bunch of gloppy like waxy stuff and then you buy that rubber seal. Right. And they.

[A]

No, it's a circle.

[B]

It's a wax r. Oh, right, right, right, right. That's how it is. Yes, yes, yes. Sorry, I have done that. I just misremembered. Yeah.

[A]

I need you to check on your toilet immediately.

[B]

No, but I'm worried. But it is like there. I think there might be a rubber gasket that also like. But. But you're right. I just remembered it being like, it.

[A]

Seems so like from the 1800s.

[B]

Yeah. Because you really are just taking it as open wax. Right. It is something that you could take your finger and scoop it out if you wanted to, but then you just like position the toilet on top of it and the weight of the toilet just s into it and you're like, job done. And then you just put in a couple marks and then two. Two bolts. Right. And that's it, you know?

[A]

Yeah. Like it seems like the thing they did when they invented the first toilet. Yeah.

[B]

Like a guy was like second toilet. Really? Because maybe.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

First one. Definitely a beta test. And let's just say there were issues, but. So we put the wax ring down that came with the toilet. I'm now and I don't know, Andrew, if I should say proud owner of two crazy toilets now. Two bidet toilets built in bidet toilets that have a heated seat and the whole deal. What I realized when I had my family over for that holiday get together was I think who was it? It might have been my sister in law, Alicia said like something to the effect of, you know, people are a little intimidated by using. I remodeled one of the bathrooms in the house and I put in, you know, put in a, one of these fancy toilets, has a bidet built in. It's all, it's illuminated, it's got, it flushes for you and all this stuff. And what I didn't realize was I think people were kind of freaked out by it. So they were using the old unremodeled bathroom because it just had a normal toilet.

[B]

I would probably given the choice.

[A]

Yeah. And I don't think, I didn't do, I didn't do my homework on this. I didn't do a sort of maybe a poll of the people likely to be at my house and to be maybe using it because I just, I really like the, the fancy one. I know how to use it. And I just figured, well, let's give, let's give that gift to everyone. And my sister in law, Alicia was like, oh yeah. So the, the, that used to be the normal toilet, right?

[B]

I was like, yeah, God bless Alicia.

[A]

There's still a, there's a normal toilet upstairs if people really want to. And there's a normal toilet here.

[B]

You have three bathrooms.

[A]

You have three bathrooms in the studio. Four, counting the studio, which I hope I get some credit for when I sell this place because it was one bathroom when I bought it. It's now four bathrooms. Although I don't know if you can call the upstairs one. It's not a full bath, it's just a toilet and a sink and stuff. So you can't, you know, shower up there. But there's three full bathrooms and one little kind of half bath upstairs now. And the upstairs half bath has a normal toilet. And the adu here, the studio bathroom is a normal toilet. So. But that's kind of a hassle. I guess I just assumed everyone would be stoked about getting to wash their hindquarters. It just feels to me like that's a superior system. But I know, I know there is a little bit of a barrier to entry. And most people probably, if they're visiting someone, that's not gonna be the first time that they try to wash, wash their backside.

[B]

And it also seems like, and I know I've said this before and I guess it goes to my general misunderstanding of how these things work, but like that just is getting too close to somebody else's hoo ha for me to be comfortable sharing that. You know what I mean? It's like if it's essentially like a little hose nozzle that comes out that's getting.

[A]

What are you calling a hose nozzle?

[B]

Yeah, I'M calling you a hose nozzle. You hose nozzle feel very much like a.

[A]

It seems like a Canadian insult from the 90s.

[B]

I was going to say I feel.

[A]

Like I'm in hose nozzle.

[B]

I was literally about to say I feel like I'm in Strange Brew or something like that. But, yeah, I don't know. Like, I just don't. That doesn't seem like a shareable thing to me.

[A]

You'd be surprised. Again, I don't feel like I'm going to convince you on this, but you would be surprised. The hose nozzle is very far away from your hindquarters, from anyone's hind quarter.

[B]

I just would be thinking the whole time, this is the hose that Luke uses on his pooper, and I'm using the same hose on my pooper. That's.

[A]

Well, it's. I mean.

[B]

Oh, by the way, I'd like to say Merry Christmas Eve to everyone.

[A]

Yes, Merry Christmas Eve to everyone and to all.

[B]

A goodbye to all. Enjoy that episode of Comedy Bang Bang that you were.

[A]

But, I mean, if you think about it, you're sitting on a toilet seat that someone's, you know, butt cheeks also touched. I mean, that's.

[B]

But those are the cheeks, though. I'm just saying. I mean, I don't know how much you want to talk about.

[A]

Again, I don't feel the need to. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna convince you on this. I'm not gonna convince you on this. You're obviously highly sus. If you do come over here, I assume I will find you using the ADU bathroom.

[B]

Yes, please.

[A]

Rocking quietly in the ADU bathroom. Hiding from.

[B]

I'm gonna need an outhouse with a moon on the door.

[A]

Yes, yes, exactly. So all that is to say, we put the new toilet in and it's called the Casa de Diva, which, by the way, is also just hilarious. What a dumb name for a toilet. It seems like it's a toilet that's gonna be a lot.

[B]

Is that the one that had that casdiva over the top commercial that I think we talked about on the show? We might have even had senior bidet correspondent Chris Hayes weighing in on this, though. The commercial where it's like some luxury toilet on the roof of a building and some woman comes out and like a flowy, fancy party.

[A]

I don't think so. I think this is a, as my dad would say, Chinese. I don't think that whoever makes the cast of Diva is spending any money on commercials. They're spending money on SEO So that when you Google best affordable built in bidet toilet, it comes up as the first one on like Amazon or something. But all that is to say, we put it in using the wax ring that was sent to us from the Casta Diva Corporation and guess what? It was not thick enough. And we put the whole thing in and everything was fine. And then the next day, to our horror, we noticed that the toilet was leaking from the base just a little bit. And luckily no one, I don't think no one had even used it. It was still the day before the get together and neither my dad nor I had actually even gone to the bathroom in the toilet. So it wasn't like gross, it was just like, oh, no. So we had to pull the toilet out, we had to go to Home Depot and get a new extra tall wax ring. And my. This is all on the subject of audits and shoeboxes of receipts. We're buying the wax ring. I don't know what it is. 10 bucks, 15 bucks in this economy and I'm paying for it. And she goes, would you like your receipt? And I'm like. And my dad goes, we were taking the receipt, right? I was like, no, I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to risk it on this one.

[B]

You can't return it. Like, it's open wax. Like, if it doesn't seal up, you're not going to bring that back and.

[A]

Be like, here's exactly. And it's like. But to my dad. My dad keeps every single receipt in his life.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

In his life. I think, because he's like, well, I don't know, I might need to reference this later. So I told you about the whole situation with trying to get my. Put my sister's accurate address into the system, cost him his place in line. That's just kind of how he's wired. So if I don't want my dad to ever get audited, but I do kind of, I would love to see the look on the IRS's face when.

[B]

They mess with the job guy.

[A]

Sir, could you prove this? Yeah, exactly. Just like lights a cigar.

[B]

I hope you got.

[A]

I've been waiting my whole life for this.

[B]

Now, like, you're. I mean, you mentioned that it seems like on brand for me to do that. Now before the Internet, I did keep like a bunch of receipts in my wallet from like any debit card thing that, you know, any purchase of my debit card or ATM withdrawal, because then I would balance my checkbook and all that. But in the digital age, I am not like that. I don't even keep. And we talked about this. I said one of the. I've always said one of the greatest things that the Internet has provided is you're no longer required to keep any kind of a manual, any kind of an instruction manual, for instance, online. It's like, you don't need to throw them away. If I think there's any chance I'm going to need a receipt for maybe a larger purchase or a technological thing, I'll maybe fold it up and put it in my drawer for maybe a couple of weeks. But once everything is working, I throw that away or I take a photo of it, maybe, if I'm concerned. But I do not keep anything. Any. I used to have a filing cabinet where I'd keep this stuff. I don't keep anything anymore.

[A]

That was another, like, debate me and my dad had, which was. He was like, what do you want to do with this? And I think it might have even literally been the manual for the new fancy toilet. And I said, I want to toss that right on out, dad. He goes, well. And I go, it's all online.

[B]

It's online.

[A]

It's all online, friend. I went over and I just put my hands on his shoulders and I said, there, there, there. No one can hurt you now. And then I put my hand down and I took the manual out of his hand, which was still kind of tightly gripping, and I just eased it out of his hand and I said, you're safe now, Walt. You're safe. And then you said, anyway, luckily the new wax ring worked, by the way.

[B]

Oh, I'm glad to hear it. I'm glad to hear it. You know, I had the same experience. I had never had to. I remember having this conversation when I did have to reinstall the seal on my toilet, because I think we might have even named the show. This goes back a couple of years, like a load bearing toilet or something. Because, like, it was one of those moments that especially as a new homeowner, I was reminded of quite a bit of. Just like my whole life, I just assumed that these things were part of the structure of the house, you know, like a toilet. Like, you can't just, like unscrew a toilet and pick it up. That is so unsteady. That is so unstructured. Like, that doesn't make any sense to me. But then once you're like, oh, wait, you just unscrew these two bolts, you lift the toilet up and that's it. I mean, you have to hook a.

[A]

Little in the floor, a little bit.

[B]

Of, you know, plumbing you have to unhook, but you know what I mean? It's so basic. And you're like, yeah, how could this be? I always thought. And now it. Honestly, when I see somebody, like in a fight scene in a movie, let's say in a sink breaks or a toilet cracks or something, it seems so much more believable to me now because I think there was a time I'd be like, if the toilet breaks, it's like, well, then the whole house is going to collapse.

[A]

You want to know what the absolute most satisfying thing was? We took the old toilet to the dump.

[B]

Oh, throw it over the edge.

[A]

And it was. Those things are friggin heavy, by the way. A porcelain toilet.

[B]

You got to carry it like. Like a fireman's carry or not a fireman job.

[A]

Yeah. We both had our gloves on and we pulled it out of the back of the truck. We went, one, two, and then on three, we. We hoisted it and it flew through the air in slow motion into the place where you throw that at the dump. And it was just like ultra satisfying.

[B]

I had to, because I didn't want mine to break because I was just replacing the seal on it. But keeping the toilet. I remember picking it up. I think a fireman's carry is throw it over your shoulder. Right. By the way, Bingo's in here. Now, you can't see him, but he's looking at you. He wishes you could.

[A]

I try to act bird like.

[B]

Could you flap your hands like this, like they're wings? Bingo, look, he's doing it. He's doing it. Look. Okay, he's leaving. All right. Chris is leaving the room. But I remember having to, like, carefully pick up the toilet. And I held it in my arms like a. Like a big baby as I carry because I drained all the water out of it and I was. But I needed to set it somewhere, so I was going to set it in my tub and I had to carry it gently to the tub and lay it down like a. Like a big baby Jesus to keep it on the holiday tip today.

[A]

I mean, I guess, look. I guess this shows how I'm sort of profligate with my. I should be a little more careful with money. And I should. I don't know, I should think things through. But, like, I'm sort of of the opinion that if you're pulling a toilet off of the whole situation, maybe we're going with a new toilet. And I don't know why that is like, there's nothing wrong with your. Well, there's nothing wrong with your toilet. You were just doing the floor or something, right?

[B]

Well, no, the toilet, the. The seal had broken or something. But I'd already. But I mean, the. One of the first things I did when I moved in, I'm sure was get a new toilet seat. I always do that. I don't use it. I don't use toilet seats from previous owners.

[A]

Interesting. See, that never even occurred to me. Like that toilet that was in the original bathroom, the only bathroom at this house. I'd never even thought to change the toilet seat. And in fact, it was funny because when we were throwing it into the. Into the dump, I was thinking, what this toilet has seen, man. Because it's not even like, I think it went back. Like multiple owners of the house. So it isn't even just like the people before me. It's like the people before them and the people that visited them. It's like, eek. Yeah, I'm kind of ready to get this out of my life. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. So no, my toilet. I didn't want to buy a whole new toilet because I think it was relatively new, but I did need to fix that seal. And oh, I guess I was going to say, not that it's super interesting, is just like you. It took two times. Like, I don't know what I did wrong. The first stress. Yeah. Because then almost exactly like you said, the next morning you wake up and there's more leakage or whatever and you're like, ah, damn it. But then. But the second time took. And I do remember those seals being very affordable too. That's the thing. But you're talking about keeping the receipt. I remember being shocked. I think they were like, when I bought mine, I think maybe because it wasn't extra tall. I think it was $5. It was under $10 for this. It's like this thing that is. It is the seal between toilet water going all over the floor. Yes.

[A]

It's a well ordered life. Or absolute chaos.

[B]

It's 590 on the wax ring. Exactly. Thank you, baby.

[A]

All right, let's thank some donors. These are the folks keeping us in toilet wax money.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

Could not have afforded the extra tall toilet wax ring without the support of folks like Patty Birkenshaw out there in Lake Stevens, Washington, home of Tom Thumb Market.

[B]

Now, I should mention here that we're not actually using TBTL funds to buy you fancy toilet and toilet equipment, but it is what pays our paychecks. Which allows us.

[A]

Where we draw our. We draw a salary for doing this, as does John Sklaroff. And then we. Andrew, we get to spend it on whatever we want, including toilets that nobody likes.

[B]

Yeah. I just want everybody to know that we're not using the TVTL credit card for that. You get in some sketchy areas as far as, you know, as far as.

[A]

Oh, that's got a pro account going at Home Depot. At Home Depot. I do have a pro account, which. It doesn't cost you anything. And it's like, you know, you get some percentage back at the end of the year. And I really should have signed up for it, like, at the beginning of this project, you know. Now I'm kind of at the end. I'm not really spending a lot of money at Home Depot, but. But I'll like, oh, can I put in my PRO number? I give them my number and they're like, what's the name on the project? And then I'm like, scrambling. Like, I need to say, like, job 3, 2, 77 or something. And I'm just saying, like, house. Because they put.

[B]

And understand what you meant by pro. Like, you literally. I thought it was just what they call, like, the other. You're also a wizard with Avis, but you're not.

[A]

Yeah, I have a pro account at.

[B]

Home Depot, so they do. You have to keep up appearances. Like, you're a. Like an. Actually somebody who's in the trade professionally.

[A]

I have to have a hammer, a hammer hanging from one of those loops on my. Like, on my pants.

[B]

You have to ride in on a jackhammer like a pogo stick.

[A]

They've asked me to stop doing that.

[B]

It's bad on the wax. Yeah, sure.

[A]

But no, it's just called a pro account. I mean, I think it's supposed to, you know, what they're trying to do is get trades people to want to come in. And if they're buying a lot, a lot of stuff, but it doesn't cost anything. There's no minimum order. And it just does give you back some small percentage. I don't know. Or you get some coupons in the mail. I don't know. I got talked into it at some point. But the thing is, if I was really a pro, they'd say, well, what is this job? They'd put it in so that I could keep the different jobs straight. And, you know, for billing later. Like, if I'm billing the people whose house I'm putting this toilet in. But it's all just my house. So All I always say is house.

[B]

Yes, house.

[A]

What's the. Okay, what's the job? What's the job name for this house? My house.

[B]

My house. Our house. That in our house.

[A]

Look who it is. It's Jake rahr from Seattle, Washington. Our pal Jake, for many, many, many, many years, friend of the show, supporter of the show. Jake, love you, buddy. Also, we love Scotty Houghton of Everett, Washington. Scotty was keeping the fire burning for the weedus song Teenage dirtbag in the wilderness of that song's existence. That song was popular when it came out, and it had not yet re entered the pop culture the way that it did. And in those lean years, those years when I don't know if the guys from weitis were getting any checks at all, Scotty was personally keeping that going by singing it at karaoke every time we hung out.

[B]

I went to a baseball game with Scotty one time because somebody I think had dropped out, and he reached out to me, he said, andrew, I've asked literally everybody I know. I've asked all of my good friends.

[A]

I'm out of options.

[B]

All of my medium friends. I asked all of my enemies, and nobody was available to go with me. Would you go with me? And I said I would. And it was a really good time. And I always. I think I've told this story on the show. I can remember the pitcher who started that game. It was Tommy for the Mariners. Yeah. Remember, we had a guy that we would bring up every now and then named Tommy. Do you have any idea who I'm talking about? Why would I start this sentence?

[A]

Well, he was the. Wait, but he was. Was he the guy that was also a bartender?

[B]

No, he wasn't. But he had only come up because.

[A]

We had a Tom Wilhelmson.

[B]

Tommy Malone was his name. Yes, Tom Wilhelmson was a little bit earlier than that.

[A]

But for some reason, Tommy Malone sounds like he should have been under a baby carriage getting shot at by Elliot Ness.

[B]

It's because I remember because our friend dur's always called him mommy Talone, I think, or something like that. But anyway. Yes.

[A]

See, why can't we do that, Andy? And then I can unblock you.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Anyway, thanks, Scotty. We love you. And then Tyler Neeme, check this out. Longview, Washington, home of the Monticello convention.

[B]

Andrew, what is that?

[A]

That's how Washington state became a state. I learned this because I was looking at the park down there in Longview recently. They have a big, really cool, actually like kind of historic marker so many years ago. I want to Say in the maybe 1850s, all of where I am and where Tyler is and where you are. Actually, it was all Oregon Territory. It went all the way up to, I don't know, British Columbia or whatever was going on up there. And it was all. This was all Oregon Territory. And some folks down here in my area got together and they said, dad Gummett, this is too large of a territory to have it all. Salem, Oregon, is too far for us to take our wagons to. To have business with the state or with the territory. So they put together a plan to make this area into its own state. And they wanted to call it Columbia because of the Columbia River. But they went back to D.C. and the people in D.C. congress said, that's gonna be too confusing. Cause we have District of Columbia. So then they went with Washington, which, by the way, not less confusing.

[B]

Yeah, I was gonna say. Yeah, right.

[A]

It actually seems arguably more confusing. But that's what they went with. And they prevailed to get this declared a state. And that's called the Monticello or Monticello Convention. It happened in Longview, Washington.

[B]

But also, isn't Longview, Washington where you can go to the bank and they'll use pneumatic tubes? Weren't you just saying that?

[A]

Yeah. There's a lot to love about Longview, Washington, including the fact that our friend Tyler is there. Thanks, Tyler. Emily Todd is in Torrance, California. California. California, California, here we come where do you come down on that Phantom Planet song? You like it, right?

[B]

Is that who. That's Phantom Planet.

[A]

Yeah. We've been on the run Driving in the sun Looking out for number one California, here we come With Jason Schwartzman on the drums.

[B]

You know, I. You sing that song, and I feel like I know it, but I thought it was this. I thought you were singing the theme song to the OC I believe, was that they used it as a theme song to the OC I never watched the OC But I know that song because I think some band, another indie band that we like, covered it, I think. And so, anyway, that's why I know that song. And, yeah, no, I do like it.

[A]

I think that song is a pop gem.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Absolute gem. Emily Todd loves it as well, down there in Torrance. Emily Todd from Torrance, California. That's my impression of Torrance.

[B]

Sorry. It was.

[A]

You know what's funny? I did such a bad Burt Reynolds impression that it sounded like I was doing the Shining. And then, of course, Torrance is relevant to that movie. I was trying to do Burt Reynolds and Boogie Nights when he goes Eddie Adams from Torrance.

[B]

Oh, I didn't remember because he meets the.

[A]

He meets Mark Wahlberg's character, I believe at a restaurant and he's Eddie Adams from Torrance.

[B]

Before we get to chest Rocke Rockwell.

[A]

Well, he became Dirk or Dirk Diggler.

[B]

Right, sorry.

[A]

John C. Reilly became Chester Rockwell.

[B]

Yes. Messed it all up.

[A]

We need to. At some point we need to revisit that. You know the tapes. Do we have that as is that intro tape when they're trying to get their masters back from.

[B]

Sure, maybe. Maybe next week once we get through the.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. It's not very holiday.

[B]

Probably not tomorrow.

[A]

Nothing about. There's a Christmas movie for you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Everyone. Hey, kids, gather around. We're gonna watch Albert Molina in a drugged out state while guy lights firecrackers behind him.

[B]

Just like the most sweaty cocaine y intro tape we have. Start that. Use that on Christmas day tomorrow.

[A]

Just the highest of anxiety radiating off of the television. Thanks also to Seth Allison, who's in Belchertown, Massachusetts. Now that's a name for you.

[B]

It certainly is. Thank you.

[A]

That's where Bob and Tina and the family are from. Right?

[B]

That's what I was just thinking. Yeah.

[A]

Presumably. Hey, thank you so much to our donors for making TBTL possible. We couldn't do this without you.

[B]

Hello and welcome to Top Story.

[A]

All right. We're doing lists this week and you've got a list. It's an email. I understand. Right?

[B]

Yeah. This is a list sent in from listener Sarah. Again, these are people just sending. If you want to email me or call in a list, you can email me andrewbtl.net or leave us a voicemail at 206-414-8285. That's 206-4414 TBTL and people are putting together their own personal top five lists and Sarah has the top five walks. One can go.

[A]

Love it.

[B]

Yes. In fact, I'm realizing this is a list that goes 1 to 5. But I should probably. I should probably read this backwards. Right. Start with five and end with one, I'm guessing.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

So I think that. I think that is what we want to do here. So I will do that. But I was thinking we needed some sort of audio spackle. Yesterday was a couple of days ago was a bit of a disaster when I tried to choose that mama's family sounding music. So I just went to the YouTube free audio library here of music we're allowed to use and I put in holiday as a theme. So I want to. Let's let's choose some. Do we like that or is that a little bit dramatic? That's called Christmas Shores. We also have holidays.

[A]

I like this better.

[B]

This is Holly Dazed. This got a little bit jaunty, didn't it? But Christmas Village. Oh, oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. This is great. It's only 90.

[A]

Feels like you're taking a walk in a courier and I.

[B]

You're absolutely right. This is perfect. I mean, you might be in the back of a horse drawn carriage, but this is very nice.

[A]

You've definitely got one of those muffs on that's like you slide both hands into.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You don't see people using those anymore. I feel the technology has come a long way.

[B]

Football players.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Around their waistband.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that'd be nice. All right.

[A]

Why don't any football players ever have their mouth guards in? Andrew?

[B]

Yeah, I guess during. Do they do. Put them in during the plays. Do they put them in then spit them right back?

[A]

No, in the plays you'll see them running constantly and their. Their mouth guard is connected to their face mask with a little loop and it's just going. Just flopping around. It seems like it would make it so much harder to do your job. I think they are legally obligated to have the mouth guard, but they don't have to have it in. So most of them don't.

[B]

You should wear. Folks, if there are any NFL players listening right now. Do you think there's ever been an NFL player who's listened to an episode of.

[A]

There has been. John Moffat of the Seattle Seahawks.

[B]

Right. Of course.

[A]

Kind of became pals, actually. I guess he would have been an ex. Like, he made a big splash when he walked away. So that's when he started listening to tbtl.

[B]

And then he. And then he got in trouble for selling drugs, which did he. Somebody very close in my life bought or at least received some mushrooms from him.

[A]

I didn't know this part of the plot.

[B]

A friend of somebody very close to me tripped with him and some friends and some friends.

[A]

Then he got in trouble.

[B]

He really became a man about town. But then. But that was more fun. And it was like post. It was right after he was a player and he was kind of like, you know. But then I think he might have. You'd have to Google it. But I think we saw a headline after I had lost any kind of connection to him or my friends did. And I think he ended up actually maybe getting in legal trouble for messing around with something a little bit more serious than that. But If I'm. But I'm not telling stories out of school there. If you can't find a newspaper article that backs that up, then I'm wrong about that because I thought I was. Oh, this is just going to keep going. And no, no lyrics. We're gonna go back to Christmas Village. All right, here we go. Sarah has a top five walks. And also by the way, through at the end of here, quickly, top five underrated smells as well. Which really has to do that tomorrow. Okay. But the, the, the, the more in depth list here is number five. A walk to kill time with a good walking companion, a good conversationalist and the same walking speed is important. Or the reverse of this. A walk with a chatty four year old, which is interesting. That's gonna be a different. So number five is a walk with a good companion or a chatty four year old, huh? Never had the chance to do that.

[A]

I could see the. Oh, well, sure. I mean, I used to have a chatty 4 year old. I could see that being, you know, because it's, it's nice because, you know, you're in motion. So the kid is probably kind of being slightly entertained by what's going on. A lot of questions come up. I personally loved, because I like feeling smart. I loved the phase of my daughter's life where there was a lot of questions about how stuff works and why that is like that. And so I, some parents, I think are exhausted by that. I found it to be really fun. And then, yeah, the pace thing, the walking at the same pace is important. Becca and I walk. I've learned that we actually walk a little faster than normal people. So we're kind of going around folks a lot, particularly when we've been on trips to Europe and stuff with other tourists. But what I really hate is when someone is walking exactly the same pace as us, but like four steps behind us. Yep, I will stop and let them go in front of us. I don't know what primal fear that is in my mind, but it's like I don't like somebody being just a little behind us, but constant. It's got to like I, you know, or when.

[B]

Usually I'm a little bit faster than the people on the sidewalk. So that's it for me is I'm coming up on somebody and then I, then I try to make a lot of noise so that they know that I'm behind them so I'm not scaring them. Especially if it's nighttime or something like that.

[A]

My feet, if I'm Jogging.

[B]

Stuff your feet. Or if I. If I. I'll jingle some keys. Casually. Something along those lines. All right, let's see here. Number four on the list is a walk in early spring when the trees start getting bright green and you get warm and you realize that maybe seasonal depression is a thing and that spring is a sign of things getting better. That sounds like a heck of a walk.

[A]

Yeah, it's beautiful. Yeah. Incredible. The smells, too. I know. There is a smells list that we could address later, but I. I feel like that's the other thing about a nice spring walk. I mean, I have that exact same experience. It's so basic of me, but it's also true. It's like when I'm walking around and things are now green and. And it smells like life is coming back and it's a little warmer.

[B]

It is.

[A]

Sort of fixes something inside me that gets broken about this time of year and continues to be broken until, like, I don't know, we get that first nice week in April or May.

[B]

I'm not one to say that this doesn't sound wonderful. A spring walk is wonderful, but the. The one I'm drawn to is almost, like, on the opposite side of the calendar for me. During the fall, I can't not walk. That's where I go on a lot of walks. And I always collect, Like, I think we've talked about this. I always collect what I call a buckeye. I think some people call them horse chestnuts. They'll drop on the ground around that time, kind of early fall. And I'll always pick one up, and then that'll be my walking companion for the rest of the fall. And then I try to save them, but I like to kind of go on the same route every day. And like that. That's it for me. So all of that. Except for me, it's in the fall. Go ahead. Sorry.

[A]

Well, it's funny because this is something that Becca and I talk about a lot because we take a lot of walks, that there is a period of time in the fall, believe it or not, and a period of time in the spring when it's almost the exact same temperature and like, I guess you could say sort of light levels, except we find the fall walks much more depressing because it's the beginning of the dark, whereas the spring walk is the beginning of the nice. But it's like. But fall. It's a fall walk before the leaves have really turned and everything's dropping. So you could kind of squint and think it was still spring, and it's not the dead heat of the summer, so you're kind of on those shoulders, I guess you might call it. But we always talk about, like, how much more fun we find a spring walk because we know that it's the beginning of this whole great thing instead of this whole great thing coming to an end. You are not deterred by that?

[B]

No. Oh, no. I love. I. Oh, there it is. This is. This is pure winter here. No, I, I, I love a fall walk. It's. Honestly, you can't. You can't keep me. You can't keep me inside anyway. Okay, so let's keep going down here. Number three on the list of top five walks is a walk when you think it's too cold outside, but you do it anyway, and it's not too cold in a few minutes and you feel alive. What did you tell that man in the elevator?

[A]

Dress for the second mile.

[B]

Exactly. You get warm out there, don't you?

[A]

You do. You work up a little bit of a sweat and, you know. Yeah, that is a nice feeling. I'm. I'm kind of bummed because we have not had any really cold weather so far this year because it's been. It's been, you know, atmospheric rivers, and it's been. It's been wet and warmer than normal. And I'm excited for a cold day to take a walk and put a scarf on. I got this scarf in England this summer that I bought at the gift shop of the Tate Museum, and I haven't had a chance to wear it yet because we haven't gotten any nice, crisp, cold weather. So. Looking forward to that.

[B]

I was just thinking, I need a better scarf. I have a cheapo little scarf that I bought last at the end of last winter when I lost my other one. And I was thinking, I need to buy a scarf. I'm just. So I don't go anywhere anymore. Like, I don't go shopping in stores that sell clothes, unfortunately. And maybe I just need to. And so that means I'm like, do I buy a scarf online? I know that sounds like an obvious thing, but I was literally thinking about this yesterday. I'm like, do people buy scarves online? And of course they do. People buy everything online. But for some reason, I feel like with scarf line, seems you need to.

[A]

Put it around your neck and do a loop to give it a. See how it's gonna sit on you. Why don't you go down and support one of our department stores? Why don't you go down to Nordstrom or go down to pennies. Go down to one of those stores and go to the Scarf.

[B]

Where's our pennies?

[A]

Do they not have pennies anymore?

[B]

I mean, and I don't, I can't. I mean, I always think of Pennies as like an anchor store for a mall. And there aren't a lot of malls. I was sort of thinking, and this is my. Whenever I think about going to a store like that, I think that probably U Village would be the place to go.

[A]

Oh, sure.

[B]

But then I think, like, just the idea. I get hives.

[A]

Go to Eddie Bauer in the U.

[B]

Village about the parking situation at U Village. Like they're just getting in and out of U Village. Like, did somebody. And this would be actually interesting. Did the person who kind of did the urban planning around you Village, Were they the first urban planner to plan an entire project while on acid? I cannot believe how unbelievably difficult. You know what I mean? How there are certain, like there's. At one point it's a four lane road, but then two of the lanes split off into curlicues and some of them go directly into the mall area. Some of them.

[A]

Are you talking about when you're coming down 45th?

[B]

I don't know which way I'm going. I'm on a pretzel. I do think I'm thinking of 45th though. Yeah, that's. That's one of the places. But then sometimes if you try to sneak around the back from 65th, you kind of end up in the same thing. And that's before you're even in the parking lot. And then the parking lot is just filled with like people who will just like park their car for 15 minutes because they think somebody's coming out of a spot and they don't give a shit who's behind them. It's just, it is my worst nightmare when it comes to like driving and parking.

[A]

Well, can I, can I blow your mind?

[B]

Yeah, please.

[A]

This is something that I have done, you know, I did a few years ago and it has really served me well. I have shifted my entire approach to parking, which is I just go park in the far ass away part of the lot.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

I don't try to park close and I just tell myself a few more steps.

[B]

Oh, me too. Oh, no, I, I'm the last person I, I've done that. I think that's probably a Bob Walsh philosophy too. Like. No, no, you don't. The idea of fight, I mean, first of all, the idea of fighting the Only thing grosser than like kind of fighting or wrangling over a parking spot that is like 40ft closer. The only thing grosser than that is fighting over inheritance. I think those are two things I will never do in my life. Like. No.

[A]

And I'll never have one. So problem solved.

[B]

But for me, for the. For the uvillage thing, it's just. It's not me trying to get the best spot. You just.

[A]

It's usually there are like no spots.

[B]

There are just no spots. I do think. Think that it took me a while to discover that there's. There is a garage.

[A]

Yeah. But that garage is also confusing to me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it feels. And I think this has come up on the show before. I feel like the levels are all different, like musical instruments. But I don't know. But I feel like in the elevator, the sort of key, if you will. The indicator isn't very clear. So I'm just like. I don't know what floor drums are.

[B]

Yeah, right. Are they confused?

[A]

Can we have a number, honey? Are we parked on. Are we parked on saxomophone or drums?

[B]

Right. They should make them really weird. The harmonium. You're on the harmonium level.

[A]

The Portland airport has the same problem. They're trying to be clever. So there's like a green beaver and an orange salmon. And there's a moose, but a moose in grace. But it's like. I'll just take a number, please.

[B]

I think they should name them all after obscure former Mariners pitchers like Tommy Malone. Youthful parked on.

[A]

Make it a Tom Wilhelmson, a Tommy Malone, a Jim.

[B]

Be as many of them Toms as possible, too. To make it really complicated, get an.

[A]

Aaron Sealy in there. How about a Scott Bankhead? Sinker ball pitcher Scott Bankhead.

[B]

Do I have two songs going at once now? What? Oh, man, this list is going great. I'm gonna.

[A]

Are you redesigning the U Village?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know what parking structure right now. On acid. Okay.

[B]

Okay. Here we go. This is number two on Sarah's top five war walks and top five underrated smells. A walk in. In a place you used to live 10 or more years ago, but you still don't need a map. Preferably you're doing this with someone you lived with at the time for nostalgia or someone you didn't live with at the time that you can bore with the details that mean absolutely nothing to them. That used to be a laundromat. Wow. Crazy. They didn't change that sign.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. I've literally said Those words to people walking here. I'm walking here. Like. Like, by the way, the fact that I didn't use that for the drop to start the show is an absolute travesty. That's how boring it is to be somewhere with me where I used to live or go to a lot. Not only will I comment extensively on what is different, I'll comment on what isn't different.

[B]

Yeah, right. I love that.

[A]

So boring. Yeah, that's what that used to be. And that remains that.

[B]

All right, are we ready for number one? Because I want to see if I can jam in these smells, too, because it's just a really quick list. But number one is a walking here. Do you know that I think that isn't. Doesn't legend have it that that was improvised? Yeah, improvised. Were you the one telling me that that that actually happened? No, but I like a car.

[A]

I could absolutely see that. Yeah, I could absolutely see that. Slams his Dustin Hoffman severely in the moment.

[B]

Number one on Sarah's top five walks and top five underrated smells is a walk in a place you've never been to. A new city, a new neighborhood with a destination in mind, like a dumpling shop or good coffee or a bakery. That is the number one walk, a place you've never been to with a destination in mind. I do like that is one thing. When I'm visiting a place, I really. I remember this. When I was visiting Boston for the first time, it was very important for me not to look like a tourist. I remember I always kept a brisk pace, had a globe under my arm or whatever. I didn't want people to think that I was a visit, a visitor, even though I was visiting. I mean, before I moved to the area.

[A]

Can I put in a number one with an asterisk? And it's kind of related to this one, which is. This always happens to me if I'm going to be staying in a place. Whether I'm working, I'm working here, or even if I'm just on vacation, if I'm in a new city or a city I'm not particularly familiar with the first day, I'm totally confused by everything in terms of what's near the hotel or the Airbnb. Everything feels kind of foreign to me. I'm checking the maps on my phone a bunch. And my favorite walk is like the day three walk, when you now know everything about the neighborhood and you know about the hotel and you know the people at the front desk and you. You know which floor the ice is on and you know, which little, like, you know, like bodega around the corner. This happened to us when we were staying in London. We rented a. An Airbnb and we ended up by the, like, last day there. We're there maybe in London for four or five days. We knew the neighborhood shops and we knew the one we liked and the one that was not as great and stuff. I love that walk. I love the walk of familiarity that you have in a place that you've been just for a short time, but it kind of starts to feel a little bit like home to you and a little less confusing.

[B]

Great call. I love that.

[A]

That's a good walk to me, too.

[B]

All right. I had one the other day that it wasn't like I was going on a walk. It wasn't. It was just. But I was literally walking. Maybe it was just like 10 blocks or something, tops. But my God, did I have a sort of visceral moment. That's the wrong word there, but I'll just plow ahead. I got off the train and I was going to meet Genevieve, and it was a winter day. I don't think it was actually drizzling, but, you know, it was a winter day in Seattle, so it was, you know, it was like a little bit chilly, scarf weather, you know, little bit of moisture, maybe it had just rained, I don't know. And I was walking to meet Genevieve, specifically in a very cozy little underground, a little bar that has been there forever. Luke, you would know. At the college pub. Right, Right.

[A]

Oh, sure. Isn't that going away?

[B]

Well, it's been going away and then coming back a bunch of times. It's under new ownership again for the second time in like six years or something. And it's just been reopened maybe for a couple of months. But it's one of those. It's a bar that is subterranean. It's kind of in the basement. It's a classic college pub. Like, very. A lot of wood and stuff in, like, a lot of wood and stuff. Stuff in there. Literally. There's a fireplace in there. And I just had been on this mission to go to cozy places this winter. And so I was going to go there to read my book, but it's like around the corner from where Genevieve works. So I'm like, hey, I'm going. And she's like, yeah, I'd love to meet you there. So getting off the train, walking down the Ave for somewhere between five and 10 blocks, and it's winter and you're smell like every place I passed had to smell.

[A]

You're walking by Schultz's sausages.

[B]

I walked by Schultzes and there was a fireplace in the, in the window of Schultzes. I passed the Solstice Cafe, which is like this, like the very cozy looking little coffee shop and cafe. I passed Bulldog News, which smelled like newspaper and a big. In Seattle. Especially when you're walking past these places, these coffee shops that you just get these big whiffs of coffee being brewed and you see people getting the coffee and the steam coming off of it. It was like I was in a storybook. I could not have been. I could not have been happier. And knowing that I was going to this cozy little bar to read a book with Genevieve, it was just like very, very, very nice little walk. So I'll add that as well.

[A]

So that, that kind of bridges us into the smells list.

[B]

Yeah, it does. So and this one is just. And she doesn't even list them. It's just like, just very, very quick. So I'll rattle them off in the way that Sarah presents them and then we can. And then we can discuss them as a whole, if you'd like. Also, I liked thinking about this. Top five underrated smells. Printer paper, pickles. Ivory bar soap, apples. And I love this one. Luke Irons getting hot. Like a close iron getting hot. That is.

[A]

How interesting.

[B]

You know what I really like about this list? This is very much in. This is in line with what I like. This isn't a list of top five best smells. There are better smells. Coffee being brewed or. These are the underrated smells. These are the smells that people aren't talking about but should be. And I really, I love this. I think this is.

[A]

I, I'm gonna, I'll throw iron in there. Because I'm often in a hotel and I'm like, is the iron going to work?

[B]

Uh huh.

[A]

And when you smell that, you're like, okay, this iron works. Yeah, we're set. So there's a relief factor there.

[B]

Very comforting, right?

[A]

Yeah, very. Printer paper. That's interesting. I mean, I've put these, I've. I've said this like not that long ago on the show. But also low key. I do like the smell of gasoline.

[B]

Yes, yes. Especially a two cycle, like we were.

[A]

Talking and one cigarette being smoked far away from me but still outside. Not a cigarette being smoked in a room with me or in a car with me with the windows up. But like just a little. Maybe outside, maybe it's a bar and there's one cigarette being smoked. Just the smell of one cigarette. I like.

[B]

Yeah, I'm with you.

[A]

I smell one cigarette a day, that's it.

[B]

I don't have a problem as just at night to relax, I go about four blocks away from somebody smoking a cigarette. As an ex smoker, like, I'm with you. I don't think when I was a smoker, first of all, I don't think I realized when I was a smoker how bad the smell of smoke clinging to somebody is. Like when I worked at Cairo, we worked with several people who would go out for cigarettes and then come back in. And it still. The smell of cigarettes on a person is so much worse than just a little bit of cigarette smoke in the air from far away. And now that people don't smoke that much, you can smell a cigarette. Cigarette from really far away. Our noses aren't as used to it.

[A]

I'm like a shark. When there's a milliliter of blood, a tiny drop of blood in the ocean and the shark can smell it from a mile away. That's me. If someone lit a cigarette right now in Tacoma, I would be able to smell it.

[B]

Yes, exactly. Exactly. Sarah, I enjoyed both of your lists. I love Sarah. Thank you very, very much.

[A]

May all your walks be wonderful and full of amazing smells. Holiday season. Season.

[B]

That's right. And is our business done here today on this?

[A]

Yes, sir.

[B]

Christmas of Eves? Yes, it is.

[A]

I've got sugar plums to stuff and other such. I'm trying to think what's. What else is in the song.

[B]

Let's see here.

[A]

Towards the night before Christmas and all.

[B]

Through the house dancing. Right. Our sugar plums.

[A]

Yeah, I've gotta. I've gotta. I've gotta choreograph some dances for some sugar plum.

[B]

Okay, that's good.

[A]

And the like.

[B]

So sweet.

[A]

All right, that is gonna do it for today's episode of tbtl. But we're gonna be back here tomorrow on Christmas Day. Yes, indeed.

[B]

Little special. A little special thing. We'll tell you about it tomorrow. We're doing something special tomorrow. Yeah.

[A]

Exciting times. So please make sure you tune in for that. Maybe you'll do some last second Christmas wrapping and listen to us and do the whole thing. So we will see you then. In the meantime, have a great Wednesday. Have a great Christmas Eve, hopefully with the ones that you love. And we'll see you tomorrow. In the meantime, please remember, no mountain.

[B]

Too tall and good luck to all. Power out.