Andrew Walsh (1:20)

How are you today?

Tim Heidecker (1:26)

He says, fine.

Andrew Walsh (1:29)

T, B, T, M Guess what day it is Guess what day it is.

Maddie (1:38)

It's Friday Friday Gonna get down on.

Luke Burbank (1:42)

Friday Everybody's looking forward to the weekend I feel a real need to express something, but I don't know what it.

Maddie (1:49)

Is I want to express or how to express it.

Luke Burbank (1:51)

Oh, I see. Dirty monkey not okay, but dirty monkey dance. I know people say, I'll fill up, but you have no idea how my body processes soup. And boom goes the dynamite. All right, that.

Andrew Walsh (2:05)

Gotta run.

Luke Burbank (2:05)

See you on the flippy flop. Well, all right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Friday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

Andrew Walsh (2:17)

Why now?

Luke Burbank (2:18)

What are they doing?

Andrew Walsh (2:19)

And how can you steer clear of it all?

Luke Burbank (2:21)

My name's Luke Burbank. I'm your host. Bring It Back home, baby. Bring it back Home Coming to you from the Madrona Hill Studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia, where it feels great to be back here in the comfortable confines of the Madrona Hill studio.

Andrew Walsh (2:39)

I'm back. I've returned.

Maddie (2:46)

I'm back, y'.

Andrew Walsh (2:47)

All.

Luke Burbank (2:48)

It's really interesting to see. I haven't been here for, I don't know, seven days or something. Six days, I think. Last Friday I did the show from here. But there is, you know, I look out over the mighty Columbia, and on the other side of the river is actually the state of Oregon and these big, you know, sort of hills that have a lot of, like, forest land. And I've been watching the forest be deforested. I mean, it's private land. It's, I guess, you know, they own them trees, but they've really. They've really deforested a lot of the hills above Rainier, Oregon, since I was gone. So everybody's been hard at work. Here we are, it's, by the way, Friday the 13th.

Andrew Walsh (3:28)

Oh, my God.

Luke Burbank (3:31)

So things could get spooky today on the show, but it's also the day before Valentine's Day.

Maddie (3:37)

Love is wearing makeup to bed and.

Andrew Walsh (3:39)

Going downstairs to the Burger King to poop.

Luke Burbank (3:41)

So things might also get very romantical here on the show day. A lot going on here on episode 4663 in a collector series.

Andrew Walsh (3:50)

Let the fun begin.

Luke Burbank (3:51)

For 1000. I should say 669 would be a big better number, but no, it's 663.

Andrew Walsh (4:00)

I wish I hadn't done that.

Luke Burbank (4:01)

Speaking of regret, I signed up for a credit card at a store. It was one of those. It was a moment of weakness. It's like, do you want 20% off? And I thought, it's not going to be worth the hassle. Don't do it. And I did it. And it's become a total hassle. We'll talk about that. Also, Chipotle is struggling to generate profit. In fact, they're losing money. And so they've decided to fix it with something that seems counterintuitive to me. I might have tacos when I go home. I'm not quite sure yet. So we'll get to that, time permitting, and we'll say hello to this young man. Longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ship.

Andrew Walsh (4:42)

Hey, Romano.

Luke Burbank (4:43)

He's Andrew Walsh and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

Andrew Walsh (4:46)

Good morning, Luke. You know how you made that immediately regretted? I'm not gonna say regretful, but it seemed like you regretted making a 69 joke a few minutes ago in the intro. It got me sort of thinking about.

Luke Burbank (4:59)

I've Been listening to too much Howard Stern again, is the issue.

Andrew Walsh (5:02)

Are they still. Are they still making those jokes?

Luke Burbank (5:04)

Ronnie the limo driver?

Andrew Walsh (5:05)

Oh, sure. Do you think that Howard was hurt when he moved to Las Vegas, by the way? Was he, like, personally insulted? Should we get into that or let it go? I was thinking about your. About 69 and 420 and how our generation, like those, like, for some reason carries some sort of inherent humor that, you know, for the most part, I think you and I miss us with that. Having said that, I saw a picture online the other day on the Blue sky app, which I guess as I say it out loud, you can never be sure that somebody didn't stage this thing, but somebody took a photo of one of those gift store stands where you can buy, like, license plate, like fake license plates with numbers or something. Something along the lines of that. And six sixes and sevens were all out, but not nine. And somebody was like, they did it. Like, the younger generation did it. They ousted 69 as being funny, and now it's 6 7. And I thought, oh, maybe that's interesting. I'm not really young. I don't really know. But I will say, you remember that photo that I shared with you guys the other day of me wearing a football jersey in high school, a Walsh Jesuit football jersey? I noticed for the first time in, I don't know, the 35 years since that was taken, that the jersey number I'm wearing is 6 7. And I noticed it and I was like. And then other people commented online and I was like, oh, it's working. If six, seven, the whatever. Like, even if it's not humor, the notability of that is the fact that it is not sinking is even if I'm noting it, I guess the youth have won. It's working. It's working.

Luke Burbank (6:48)

I, you know, what I was going to say in response to that was, eh, it's a fad. It'll finally. It'll burn. It'll burn too brightly. And then we'll be back to having 69 be the funny numbers. But then I thought, why would 69 come back? That's gonna die with us. And that's fine, by the way. Things change. And, like, there's plenty of stuff that was humorous to people in the 1930s that we don't know about. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I don't think. Do we? Did I really think that in a hundred years people will think that the number 69 is funny because it refers to a sexual position?

Andrew Walsh (7:28)

Do you know my association with that. Do you recall the podcast this goes back maybe 15 years, called my dad Made a Porno. Or maybe it's just dad made a porno.

Luke Burbank (7:40)

I do. I'd forgotten about it, and now I'm remembering it.

Andrew Walsh (7:43)

I think I listened to maybe the first season of it. Genevieve carried on with, it is so funny. I think it was maybe three British friends.

Luke Burbank (7:52)

And no, you know, I did listen to that.

Andrew Walsh (7:54)

It was really funny. Like, they were just friends and they were riffing. But the thing that the central topic was the fact my dad wrote a porno. My dad wrote a porno. Oh, I said made. Right? And it was. It was. It was basically, you know, one of their dads had written some erotic fiction that he was sincere about, but then let his son, I believe it was his son read it, and the son is one of the hosts of the show. And it was just so off base on just so many ideas of sex and what would be a turn on to a reader. It was quite funny. And them just riffing on it was just. It was absolutely delightful. But I guess at one point the host asked his dad, I believe, off air, asked his dad, like, well, why do you think 69 is such a sexy number? Because he said something. He said. He just referenced it as a sexy number in the text. Why do you think 69 is sexy? And he said, because it's like the shape of a woman. Which I still don't fully understand. I still don't fully understand, but one.

Luke Burbank (8:59)

Might want to see a chiropractor.

Andrew Walsh (9:02)

But I think about it all the time.

Luke Burbank (9:05)

I think it's the most womanly number.

Andrew Walsh (9:07)

I would agree. I would agree. And it's also a silly number. Hey, ladies, don't come at me. But I also like to play.

Luke Burbank (9:15)

I've got some sound effects on my phone I'd like to play.

Andrew Walsh (9:17)

That's right, you never remembering some unfortunate sounds that actually accidentally emanated from this podcast yesterday. But putting aside the hourglass feature that you were pointing out, I also think that 8 is just a fun, frivolous number. I'm kind of surprised that it doesn't do better in comedy communities.

Luke Burbank (9:36)

I'm just now going down the my dad wrote a porno kind of rabbit hole because I want to see if they're still making the show. Because what I remember really lik about the show, because I did listen to the first season, was the dynamic of the three folks that were, you know, the friends. This, like, which, again, not that I'm comparing our show to their show, but that's Generally speaking, what people seem to like about our show is our interactions and stuff. And I just remember, like, the kind of the smut aspect of it was almost to. The sort of. Was sort of like, second. That's the second appeal to me of the thing. It was the friendship between these three people and the way they would sort of joke around. And there was another podcast like that that I really loved that was, like, about somebody clogged a toilet at a wedding.

Andrew Walsh (10:20)

Really?

Luke Burbank (10:20)

Do you remember this one? I know that I talked about it on the show. It was. I think it was. Some people were getting married. I feel like it was on a boat. And somebody clogged the toilet on the boat. And the whole, like, the boat where the wedding was and the whole podcast was them kind of like interviewing all their friends and maybe even lining them up to hooking them up to a lie detector. It was like. It was like all the people that had been at the wedding, they were trying to solve the mystery of who had clogged the toilet at their wedding.

Andrew Walsh (10:52)

I'm looking this up. I'm not seeing anything jumping off. I was also Googling to see if I could find whatever that 69 reference was on. My dad wrote a porno. I'm not finding this. I'm not finding this. It sounds amazing. It of course, makes me remember.

Luke Burbank (11:06)

Sorry. No. You know what it was? It was called who Shat? And what it was was somebody had shat. Yeah. Who shat on the floor at my wedding.

Andrew Walsh (11:14)

Oh, geez.

Luke Burbank (11:15)

What it was, was in. It wasn't. The toilet was clogged. It was in the bathroom. Somebody had actually pooped on the floor of the bathroom, I think on this boat. On this huge boat that they were having the wedding on. And the entire. And again, it's one of those things where it's sort of, I guess, a MacGuffin. Although a MacGuffin I think is made up. And. And I don't think this was made up. It really happened. But really this whole question of, like, trying to figure out who shat at their wedding was secondary to just how freaking delightful these. I think it's the couple who got married, and then it's their friend, and their friend is kind of taking the role of, like, the serious investigator of it. And I think they're, like, all British, maybe, or a couple of them are British. Anyway, it's just an absolute delight. But what I wonder about is for, like, my dad wrote a porno or who shat. I wonder what it's like to have this Runaway hit podcast that's so connected to a specific event. Yeah. Because you must just be like, we want to get all the mileage out of this that we can. Because both of these podcasts were sensations at the time and both, I'm sure, millions more listeners and downloads than we've ever gotten. And I'm looking at the, like, my dad wrote a porno. Like, they would do these live shows at like huge theaters and it would be packed. Like, in a way, both of these podcasts far exceeded us. But what do you do next if you're one of the creators of one of these things? I guess what I'm trying to say, Andrew, is right here. What we're doing. This is recession proof because we've never talked about anything interesting.

Andrew Walsh (12:38)

That's right.

Luke Burbank (12:38)

So there's no pressure to continue that. It's just, it is what it is and we can keep doing it.

Andrew Walsh (12:43)

A lot of listeners describe our podcast as a will they, won't they podcast. Will they ever find something interesting to talk about or won't they? And so that's kind of the. That's the. That's why I consider us a mystery podcast.

Luke Burbank (12:57)

And also people tune in for our hit Friday segment.

Andrew Walsh (13:00)

Andrew, do we have a hit Friday segment?

Luke Burbank (13:02)

I remember we segment where often there's an inquiry that's made.

Andrew Walsh (13:06)

Huh.

Luke Burbank (13:07)

And the question usually poses big weekend plans.

Andrew Walsh (13:10)

Oh, why'd it take so long to get to it?

Luke Burbank (13:14)

Do you have any big weekend plans?

Andrew Walsh (13:17)

No, actually, I should have done some thinking about.

Luke Burbank (13:19)

Not even for Valentine's?

Andrew Walsh (13:20)

Well, no, I don't think so. We're. Well, I'll ask Genevieve if she wants to go to dinner or something. Although can you get a reservation the Friday before?

Luke Burbank (13:27)

Probably not.

Andrew Walsh (13:28)

Man, on a Saturday.

Luke Burbank (13:29)

Not. Not. Well, I don't know what the scoop is in Seattle. I know Becca and I are going to go down to the Oregon coast tomorrow and I was trying to locate. I was really surprised. It feels like a leading. Like a leading indicator around the economy or something. And Lord knows, it's not like I'm trying to preach the message that the economy is flying high, as some might be trying to say, despite all of the evidence to the contrary.

Andrew Walsh (13:54)

What part of what I did are you in? I guess in this K shaped economy, that's the question of the day, Right?

Luke Burbank (14:00)

I think of it more as a KKK economy.

Andrew Walsh (14:02)

Yeah.

Luke Burbank (14:03)

But I. That's true. I was so. I was this week, I was, you know, Rebecca and I had talked about, you know, I was going to be traveling for work, but I'm back now. And I was like, well, maybe we'll go see if we can go on a little, like a little weekend adventure on Saturday. It's Valentine's Day. Maybe we'll go somewhere and go somewhere kind of romantic or cute and.

Andrew Walsh (14:22)

Because you're probably sick of being stuck at home anyway, like, you need to get out.

Luke Burbank (14:27)

Well, that's the thing. I was considering proposing a staycation, but I thought that kind of seemed like I was cheaping out. How about we go. How about we hang out at my house where I already live, but I don't have to go anywhere.

Andrew Walsh (14:38)

It's Valentine's stay. It's a new thing.

Luke Burbank (14:41)

Everybody's doing it, and it's where I do my laundry. That's how we celebrate. I romantically do my laundry that's been piling up in my suitcase in Los Angeles. But, yeah, so I was checking out some places, like in Astoria, Oregon, there's a bunch of cute places, but there's a particular one we've been trying to stay at called the Bowline. Totally, like, booked, booked, booked, booked. And I was like, oh, there's this cool place in binge in Washington called the Society Hotel. I was like, well, check that out. Booked solid, you know, you name it. I probably looked up about six or seven different, like, kind of cool, you know, hotels, all of them literally, like, every single room booked for Saturday night. We did find a little Airbnb down on the Oregon coast for one night. So that, that's, you know, that's going to happen. But my point is that, yeah, if you were, like, going to try to make a reservation at somewhere that is seen as, as romantic tomorrow night or had a lot of ambiance, it might be tough at least, if my experience with trying to book a place to stay is any indicator.

Andrew Walsh (15:45)

Well, I'm looking at the Bryant Corner Cafe right now where I had my sad eggs the other day. The eggs were good, by the way. And it, I don't know, it looks pretty open to me on open table. Do you think the Bryant Corner Cafe is on open table?

Luke Burbank (15:58)

Oh, how funny. The Bryant Corner Cafe used to be called the Sunflower Cafe for years and years. And in fact, when the first house that I ever bought, the real estate agent took us to breakfast at the Sunflower Cafe.

Andrew Walsh (16:13)

Was it vegan?

Luke Burbank (16:15)

I don't think it was, because I was certainly not a vegan at that time. But I remember being like, boy, this is a real scam. They gotta buy you breakfast. Because, you know, the real estate agent is Very incentivized. To give you a great time and to make a strong connection with you and to, you know, just. Again, they kind of want to make sure that they're keeping the account. So I remember my first ex and I, we were gonna, you know, we were looking at houses or we wanted to look at houses, and we called up this real estate agent and he said, well, we'll meet at this cafe. And. Oh, you know why? Because that was when we lived. Sorry, ants is so boring, Andrew. But we lived in Bryant. We lived just down, like, 55th from there, or 65th, I guess.

Andrew Walsh (16:52)

65Th. Yep, yep.

Luke Burbank (16:53)

And so he was like, where do you live? And we were like, we live in Bryant. And he was like, well, how about the Sunflower Cafe, now known as the Bryant Corner?

Andrew Walsh (17:00)

And I believe. And I'm trying to figure out if I'm right about this. There is a vegan cafe that is still called the Sunflower Cafe. And I'm trying to figure out if I'm about that or if there's any DNA, because it was right around the corner from me and Roosevelt, which would be.

Luke Burbank (17:12)

You know, it looks like I'm looking at the. I'm looking at the. Well, you know, it's funny. Sunflower hyphen. The Bryant Corner Cafe and Bakery is what you call.

Andrew Walsh (17:24)

Okay, okay, that makes sense. That makes.

Luke Burbank (17:26)

So. I don't know what the. Maybe. Maybe it was always. I don't know. I think they added that Bryant Corner thing to it at some point. Maybe it's still known on some level as Sunflower. Is it vegan? Did you get vegan stuff when you were there?

Andrew Walsh (17:35)

No, Bryant Corner is not. I'm looking. Geez, I'm really confused. And I don't need to continue this. I'm trying to figure out if I'm confusing. The Sunlight Cafe is there.

Luke Burbank (17:44)

Oh, yes, you are.

Andrew Walsh (17:45)

Sunlight Cafe.

Luke Burbank (17:45)

The Sunlight Cafe, if I remember right, is vegan, right?

Andrew Walsh (17:48)

A veget. It looks like maybe this is a vegetarian place. And it looks like it is, because it moved around a little bit when I was in Roosevelt. But they seem like a very kind of a nice little establishment. Yes, exactly. Yeah.

Luke Burbank (17:59)

They say sunlight is the greatest way to judge people for eating meat.

Andrew Walsh (18:04)

That is what they've always said. You see all. Well, so anyway, so you're heading down there. You have reservations.

Luke Burbank (18:09)

You should take Genevieve to the Bryant Corner Cat Cafe and then sit there quietly crying about a Lookout Landing article.

Andrew Walsh (18:15)

As you pointed out. I believe I called it the Outlook Landing during yesterday's show. But yeah. So anyway, yeah, No, I don't know. We're not big. We're not big Valentine's Day people. But I could ask her if she would like. I would love.

Luke Burbank (18:28)

I would. I was just thinking. I saw somebody. Somebody was saying online the other day, and I don't think there's any science behind this, but they said, if you can survive February, you're going to probably live another year. And I really feel that because a. From a weather standpoint, it's just kind of. Kind of the nadir point in a certain way. Although it's, you know, it was beautiful. I know, in Seattle on Wednesday, and it's been nice out. There's no snowpack. God knows what's happening, but I felt that. I feel a little bit like March feels kind of, you know, baseball's back, green shoots, all of that. And then also just sort of like, for me, it's so going into January. For me, January is. It's Becca's birthday. And then February comes around, and it's Addie's birthday and Valentine's Day. And the thing that I've done that is a real kind of lapse in. In strategic thinking is I have made all three of these events into big deals, and I don't know. I don't know how to step down off of the big deal thing. Like, I don't. It's like, I could never get. I don't think I could ever get away with just going like, okay, well, you know, we're not. We're not a couple who celebrates Valentine's Day with a weekend away. Or. I'm not the kind of dad who doesn't send you some elaborate gift when you're turning 32. Like, I don't know how to. I don't know how to turn the temperature down on any of these things. And so here I am. And when. And I'll tell you when February is over. When we're cruising into March, I'm like, I got 11 months before this whole stress. And, you know, and by the way, count Christmas as part of it because, like, I've barely caught my breath from Christmas before. We're now rolling into all of my February situation. And so I'm very excited to see March 1st coming.

Andrew Walsh (20:06)

My first of all, I mean, we're in very different positions because I have just lowered the expectations of everybody around me, their expectations of me, I should say, for just. I mean, for a long, long, long time now.

Luke Burbank (20:18)

I think they've been described as subterranean.

Andrew Walsh (20:20)

Yes.

Luke Burbank (20:20)

But in various articles.

Andrew Walsh (20:22)

And so my responsibilities to family, friends, other loved ones. Generally speaking, I try to get stuff for Genevieve on the occasions that it's required, but my responsibilities in this area are very important.

Luke Burbank (20:35)

You don't have any kids.

Andrew Walsh (20:36)

I don't have any kids. And so, anyway, the point is, I'm not trying to make it sound like a burden, but I'm not trying to also exaggerate what I have to put into this. But starting with the Christmas holidays, if there's some gift giving there, and then Genevieve and I have our anniversary right at the beginning, beginning of January, which is just like, you know, maybe it's two weeks after Christmas, generally speaking, then you do have Valentine's Day, which I, again, is no pressure on me. But just to note that in February and then Genevieve's birthday is the beginning of March. So for me, it's kind of like, you know, there have been times where I'm scrambling on March 1, still trying to figure out, well, I don't know. I had one idea for a gift this year. I wrote it down a long time ago, and then I got it for her for Christmas, and now what am I doing for her birthday? I will say, this year, I have got. I'm blanking on what I got Genevieve for Christmas, but I know that I had it locked down pretty early and was excited about that. And this year, I have had her gift for her birthday, which is still a month away, almost three weeks away. I have had her gift in my closet for a couple of weeks now. I am so excited about it. I almost wanted to give it to her early because I'm so excited about it. My one issue with it, though, is I want to tell you what it is, but I can't. But if she doesn't like it by getting it early. So early. Yeah, I have.

Luke Burbank (21:56)

Andrew must have come early for this one.

Andrew Walsh (22:00)

Andy must be one mean bastard to buy this so early. The concern here, though, is I've now passed while that thing has been sitting in my closet, the window for a possible return, a gift exchange or a gift return has gone out the window. So the window is closed. If Genevieve doesn't like this gift, then I've got to rehome it in some way. And it is a puppy.

Luke Burbank (22:26)

That's where you sell it to someone else, right, for rehoming?

Andrew Walsh (22:29)

I think so, yeah. So that's my one concern. But hopefully she'll like it.

Luke Burbank (22:34)

Yeah. It's a good feeling when you've got that sort of already figured out. And the thing is ordered. I sort of did the opposite this year, for the Valentine's present that I got Becca, which was. So what I ended up doing was actually had it mailed to her house because two things. One, I was a little worried about it getting here to my house on time and under budget. I was ordering it this week. I had gone online this particular gift, and I had seen that it's something that I was able to order and have sent out on a pretty quick turnaround. So I knew I didn't have to actually pull the trigger until this week. Like, it was like a two day delivery thing. But I was like, do I have it delivered to my house where a. I'm not even going to be this whole week. It could be outside in the rain. Also low key, there is a sales tax difference. If it goes to Oregon, there is no sales tax. If it goes to my house, it is. And this was not a small ticket item. So it's like, I might as well shave a couple of. Couple of bucks off of this. But then what I had to say to her was, do not go to your mailbox at your, like, where you live. Because she lives in a giant, like, apartment complex. And they, you know, they send a message like, if a certain kind of package comes into your mailbox. I was like, do not. You're not allowed to retrieve any mail after Wednesday. You're gonna have to take me down to your mailbox, give me the key, and then I'm gonna retrieve your Valentine's present out of your mailbox on Saturday. So that's the plan. How's that?

Andrew Walsh (23:58)

Yeah, I mean, well, it's. You're slipping a little bit into some Dom Sub stuff there. It sounds like a little bit like, you must give me the key. I will control the unloc of the box situation. I. I'll leave. I'll leave.

Luke Burbank (24:10)

We're learning how you keep your relationship fresh, Andrew.

Andrew Walsh (24:14)

I will give the remainder of my time to the gentleman from Southern Washington.

Luke Burbank (24:18)

Like, for you, it's still PO Box related BDSM for you. BDSM stands for Boxes deliveries, mail boxes delivery stamps, and mail stand. Your pdl.

Andrew Walsh (24:36)

Exactly. So anyway, now you all know a lot about me.

Luke Burbank (24:40)

Yeah, well, Andrew, I guess you've already bought Genevieve's gift, so you don't. You're not in danger of this. But if you do find yourself at one of these big box retailers buying something and they try to talk you into getting one of the credit cards, do not under any. I mean, I don't think you need me to remind you of this, but I Am living proof that the Michaels craft store credit card situation is a mess. I was getting a bunch of stuff framed. Speaking of, before Christmas, I was having. I bought this. I bought some various copies of this. Really cool. You would actually. Would love this thing, Andrew. It's so up your alley. This guy on Instagram did these really great kind of architectural. I think it's called a elevation is the technically the term for, like the front of a building in the kind of architectural terms of these classic cool Portland businesses like the Aladdin Theater and Clyde's Prime Rib and all these really. And did these really great architectural drawings of the front of them and made it all into this poster. And I thought this was something that a lot of my friends in Portland would really appreciate. So I bought these, but then I had to get them all framed. So I went down to the Michaels, and as I was signing up or not signing up, as I was basically paying, they were like, do you want the Michaels credit card? And I just always say no to this anywhere that's offered because I know what's going to happen. But I was in a weak moment. I was like, well, it's 20% off. And by the way, all this framing is like $400 or something. So at 80 bucks is 80 bucks, right? As you like to say, that's a round of drinks. So I was like. And I was kind of vibing with the two people at the frame, like at the counter where you do the framing at Michael's. Like, I don't know. I was just like, all right. And also, I thought probably they get some sort of little, you know, the more people they sign up for this, they probably get, you know, some kind of special bonus or something. So I sign up for it, I get my 20% off. I, of course, then I don't know how to log back into. I don't have a Michaels account. I don't have a rewards account. I don't know how to pay this card. I'm not thinking about this card. I do exactly what I knew I would do, which is I basically forget. And it goes from like, I don't know. Let's just say that my first payment to the card, my plan is just to pay it all off and close the card. And of course, I forget to make that first payment because I don't really know how to. Like, I just don't. I don't. It's not like one of my normal credit cards with my bank, or I see it there and I can pay it off. So next Thing, you know, I get like. I don't know if it was a letter in the mail or an email, but I get like an angry note from, like. They're called, like, synchrony. It's one of those weird. Feels borderline predatory, like some weird credit card you've never heard of. But they just do the heavy lifting for Michaels. So in other words, when you sign up for the. It's not like a nice old lady who's just working at Michael's, so she gets a discount on needlepoint. It's some. Some person somewhere, God knows where, who works for Synchrony Bank, Iron Mountain.

Andrew Walsh (27:42)

Oh, by the way.

Luke Burbank (27:43)

Exactly.

Andrew Walsh (27:44)

Okay. Did you see all these notes I saw?

Luke Burbank (27:46)

We should try to get to that today.

Andrew Walsh (27:47)

Okay. So I get.

Luke Burbank (27:48)

I get Iron Mountain calls me and says, so somebody. Like, I'm getting a note that's like, you know, you're like. And it's crazy how quickly it goes from like, hey, sign up for the card is 20% off to like, we will end you. Like, I get something in the mail.

Andrew Walsh (28:03)

I own you.

Luke Burbank (28:04)

Seriously. I get something in the mail, and it's like, I open it, it's like the entire thing is red, bright red. Like the. Like the. The three quarters zip up that I'm wearing right now, Andrew. And it's just like, you're in so much trouble with Synchrony Bank. And I'm like, geez. So I call them because I'm just like, I'm just going to pay this. And I get the guy on the phone, and I'll put it this way, it sounds like a person who's not in the US but what's really interesting, Andrew, is it's clear that when the person that they're talking to is in arrears, they have clearly decided that you don't have to be as polite. You know, usually you call up for help and whatever the challenges are, whatever the sort of scripting might be, or maybe the language or cultural barriers might be, there's a general attempt at friendliness. It's interesting to be talking to somebody on the other side of the world who has not been coached up on needing to be nice to you.

Andrew Walsh (28:59)

Was this a Russian mobster? Are you just trying to be nice?

Luke Burbank (29:03)

It was not, as far as I could tell. I don't want to get into. Trying to analyze the accent, but it didn't sound like Russia to me. Me, sure. But the. So the guy is like, are you going to pay this off today? And I was like, yeah, that's why I Called you. And he's like. Then he had all this boilerplate because I'm already, I'm. I'm not like being sent to collections, but I'm already in, like, I'm kind of in trouble with them. So there's a lot of legalese around. Like, this is an attempt to collect a debt. Are you willing to pay all of this today? And I was like, yeah, I want to pay this and close the card. Okay, so you're agreeing that you're willing to pay this balance today of this amount? I said, yeah. I go, how much of that is the late charge? And he goes, $15. And I go, can I get the late charge taken off? And he goes, I am able to offer you today a one time reduction in your late charge of $15. And that means you would now be owing this amount of money. And are you willing to pay that today? And I'm like, I don't know how many times I got to tell you I'm willing to pay this today.

Andrew Walsh (29:54)

I go, and for the tape, this is for the recording, right?

Luke Burbank (29:57)

Yeah, right, Definitely. But I'm like. And close the card. And he's, he's. Again, I can't. I can't overstate this. Like, like, he's. He just keeps saying weird shit to me but never agreeing to close the card. And I should have known. I should have smelled a rat because I keep saying, yeah, I'm going to pay this today and I want to close the card. And he just kept saying the more stuff like, I think he was trained to never agree to close the card.

Andrew Walsh (30:21)

Wow. This is.

Luke Burbank (30:23)

Because, Andrew, when I just got home last night, and then I went out to my little mailbox this morning to retrieve my mail from being gone. I've got this like epically long bill statement from the Michaels credit card. How much do you think my balance is now? How much you think I owe them?

Andrew Walsh (30:41)

Wait, you paid it off? So you paid it off. Zero. And now they're like charging you some sort of a service fee maybe because you're not using the card, they're adding more money to your balance.

Luke Burbank (30:52)

My New Balance is $4.72 interest charge on purchases.

Andrew Walsh (30:58)

Oh, interest.

Luke Burbank (30:59)

I don't even understand. I mean, I paid them all of the money that was on the account, and I guess they're trying to make the argument that somehow there was an interest payment due afterwards. But it's like, it's real, Godfather. They keep pulling me back in. That's my Silvio impression.

Andrew Walsh (31:17)

Yeah, it's very good. Yeah.

Luke Burbank (31:18)

But it's like they know exactly what they're doing. Like I was paying off the entirety of the balance. This is what the guy kept making me agree to hundreds of times. And now they're trying to. They're doing this because they're hoping that I don't notice this now $4.72 charge so I can go back into some kind of crazy arrears with them.

Andrew Walsh (31:38)

Okay, here's what you need to do. When you call next time and you go through the phone tree, don't choose anything that makes it sound like you're there to pay your balance. Just go through the phone tree to let the system know that you're there to close the card or whatever gets close to that department. Then when you get that person, they'll say, well, we can't close this until you clear the balance. Then you're like, okay, here's, here's a $4.25 coin and you flip it in the air at them and then maybe they'll close it for you.

Luke Burbank (32:08)

Well, here's, I'm noticing in the fine print summary of account activity. And by the way, you can have your. My dad wrote a porno. You can have my who shot. But like what other show is just reading you the summary of account activity? They're short lived. Michaels car.

Andrew Walsh (32:23)

We'll get to this, the fine print too as quickly as possible.

Luke Burbank (32:26)

Previous balance $374.45. Payment $359.49. 45 cents. Well that's, that's where they, that's where they double crossed me because I was trying to pay the entire amount off. But then you go down to my New balance is $4.72. New balance. Not just shoes for dads that refuse to admit their aging. It's what I'm dealing with. With Michael's past due amount, zero credit limit, $1,000. I don't even know if I could spend a thousand. No, I could, I could spend a thousand dollars in the Michaels. Do you know that like for, for me complaining about like the, the what the synchrony bank of this is. I actually low key, kind of really love Michaels now. Like it's my go to place for having things framed. This is also what happens when you move into a new house and you are divorced. You like got to frame some stuff and you got to get, you know, things all kind of lined up and everything. I spend more time at that Michael's than I would have expected.

Andrew Walsh (33:19)

I don't think I knew that they did Custom framing. That's good to know. Oh, yeah, it sounds like it's probably a little bit of a better deal too. Like, not that we should take money out of the hands of small business owners, but I could see it being a little bit more affordable than going to the frame shop on the corner.

Luke Burbank (33:34)

It is probably. Yeah. Because it's a larger. They probably see it as if not a loss leader. It's not the core business of theirs. So it's like, yeah, it's probably cheaper. And you're right. I'm sure we actually have some listeners who maybe do framing. I will tell you this. Of the many things that have surprised me about adult life, how much custom framing cost has. Is in the top five. I remember the first time I went to get something framed and I was like, it's a. It's a. How much? It's a what? It's. Oh, because there's matte. You're matting it. I mean, the mat looks good, don't get me wrong. And I don't want to, like, this is all, you know, this is. This is hard work and it's honest work. And I don't want to sort of act like, you know, people are trying to rip anyone off. But it was. It's always been shocking to me how much framing costs.

Andrew Walsh (34:24)

Yeah. And it has been that way, Genevieve and I even. Because I think maybe when we were in, you know, first living together, we had a lot of walls to cover. And I think that we even bought like a framing kit because, you know, Genevieve, she's very handy. And we have this special, like beveled ruler thing that had a blade on it. By the way, did you see Mina Kimes video yesterday? She has a, like, battery operated box cutter.

Luke Burbank (34:50)

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I have one of those.

Andrew Walsh (34:52)

Of course you do.

Luke Burbank (34:53)

She's wearing a sub pot.

Andrew Walsh (34:55)

She's just like the coolest person in the world. Making a 30 second TikTok of her, just like cutting up boxes with her. I sent it to Genevieve. I said, hey, when we pay off this basement reno, like, we got to.

Luke Burbank (35:07)

Get one of these $5.

Andrew Walsh (35:09)

Things are tight around here. I. She did not respond to that. She did not respond, but I never thought anybody could be.

Luke Burbank (35:14)

So tell her it's half a Fubo.

Andrew Walsh (35:16)

Yeah, it's half a Fubo. But hey, so I. Can I tell you about a little online shopping story? Because you know that I won't repeat the whole thing that I repeat every time, but I've been. I'm not a big shopper. Like You, I don't have the patience for it, but I like things I.

Luke Burbank (35:30)

Would say you don't have the determination.

Andrew Walsh (35:32)

Or the determination, the get up and.

Luke Burbank (35:34)

Go or the heroism.

Andrew Walsh (35:35)

That's right. And, but anyway, so I was telling you, I think earlier this week about how I was kind of struggling to fill some holes in my life of things that I just instantly gone to Amazon for and all I had to do is hit rebuy this thing like the socks that I like, some of the clothes that I like, or whatever. Well, the other night a couple of weeks ago, I sat down at the. I was like in the middle of a dart game. I was in the middle of a beer, which I think is more important to this story. And I was just like, I just need some things. Just take care of this right now. I was probably like playing darts and folding clothes, something I can do at the same time and probably folding some T shirts and being like, dude, you need more of these T shirts. I had mentioned to you that I've been getting these like Old Navy totally plain V neck T shirts that I mostly wear underneath other shirts. But they look okay and they're just plain. There's like various plain colors, like dark blue or maroon or something like that. And I like them. And so I'm like, okay, I'm going to get more of these. So. And I also needed various things from other, other stores as well. So I just like sort of half drunkenly sat down on the edge of my couch, which is I think how you like to do a lot of your E Commerce as well.

Luke Burbank (36:45)

It is sometimes, let's just say a fairly straight line between a glass of red wine while watching Chris Hayes and.

Andrew Walsh (36:54)

Some purchasing, doing a little consumer tamement. So I'm like, I just need to take care of this. So I buy and none of the things are like all that exciting with various clothing things. I'm just like, okay, buy this from here, buy this from here. And I and all of my stuff has shown up from that one night. And maybe I sat down and made three or three maybe purchases from three different places. But the thing that I was looking forward to the most, these V neck plain tees that I like from Old Navy are not showing up. And I'm like, ah, where are my shirts? But you know when you buy a bunch of things in one night, you get hit with a flurry of emails that say like, hey, thanks for signing up for our new rewards program and also your order is on the way and whatever. And so I just started ignoring Them. I'm like, this is all gonna work out. There was a time when online shopping for me, I was so nervous about it. I would print them out. I'd print them out, laminate them. Exactly. Now I'm like, whatever, this is all gonna work out. It always does. So I start just like, blasting those emails away, blowing them away, as my dad would say. But then a couple of weeks pass, I'm just like, where are my dang shirts? Like, everything else has been here, but I'm not getting my Old Navy delivery. And so yesterday or the day before, I sit down and I'm like, just get to the bottom of this. So I go, and I'm like, where is the confirma? And I open up my email and I'm looking through the trash folder and I see confirmations that I signed up for the Navy Old Navy rewards program. I see the first, like, kind of, you know, marketing email they sent me after that, and they're both from basically the same dates. And I'm like, I know I bought these shirts. Like, I know I bought them. I go to Old Navy and I log in. It's like, nope, no previous orders. I'm like, but I have an email here. I wouldn't have signed up for your rewards program and not purchased anything. I'm not just going around signing up for rewards programs, leaving my card empty or whatever. So. And then I'm checking my. I'm like, all right, I'm just going to rebuy these things, but just make sure they didn't hit the credit card receipt. So I'm searching the credit card receipt. I'm now like, sort of. What would be the word? Sort of cross examining my account. I'm like, okay, I guess cross referencing. Cross referencing. I see that, okay, it was February 3rd or whatever day I did this. And so I'm like, okay, what else was purchased on that day? Okay, I see the thing from Hanes came through from my other T shirts, and I'm like, okay, these other receipts came through that day. Nothing came through. So I'm like, well, I guess I just never actually shopped for Old Navy. I must have gotten distracted. Maybe that beer got on top of me. Who knows? I go to Old Navy and then I find the shirts that I want and I start buying them again. And I'm like, I remember doing this. I remember doing this so well because I was shocked that different colored shirts of the same exact style were varying prices. Like, blue must be pretty popular. That one's going for like 15 bucks. Whereas a maroon one's going for 10, right? So whatever. I'm getting into too much detail. But it was like one of those things where as I'm doing this again, I'm like, I remember debating with myself, do I want, like a robin's egg blue shirt as well? Do I want to mess with that? Looks good on the model, but he's got darker skin than me. Like, I remember having all of these thoughts, and now I'm doing it again, and I'm just feeling crazy, you know, I'm like, I'm confident that I'm not being overcharged or double charged. I clearly never did this, but I did this. And then I go to checkout. I can't remember. Maybe I picked out four of these shirts or something. And then. And then I go to my. You know, I go to checkout and I'm like, oh, wow, that price is more than I thought it was going to be. But that's kind of the way things usually work. It's just a little bit more than I thought. And then I'm right about to hit go, and it's like, okay, are you ready to check out with your eight items? I'm like, eight items? No, sir. No, sir. You might have seen this coming from afar.

Luke Burbank (40:36)

Would you like the warranty on these?

Andrew Walsh (40:38)

No. What it was was I had done everything but hit go on the last one. You probably saw that coming a mile away as I'm telling this story. That was my first experience of filling a cart and then wandering away, apparently, and not hitting go.

Luke Burbank (40:52)

But they remember power shoppers, Andrew. This is a common. A common occurren.

Andrew Walsh (40:58)

So I just kept adding to my cart the other day, and then I'm like, wait, oh, there they are. And honestly, sorry for such a boring story for people who do this very common thing all the time called shopping for their lives. But it just was such a relief to know that I was not absolutely losing my marbles.

Luke Burbank (41:14)

We was hoping for some razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle. That's right, man. Razzle dazzle. On your mark. On your mark.

Andrew Walsh (41:21)

Get set, get set now.

Luke Burbank (41:23)

Ready?

Andrew Walsh (41:23)

Ready.

Luke Burbank (41:29)

Speaking of purchasing power, we've got some donors to thank. These folks are sending a donation into TBTL of a dazzling amount of dough. That's why we call them dazzling donors. And we really appreciate it. That's how this thing works. This is 100% listener supported podcasting. And it's thanks today to Suzanne Olson over there in Renton, Washington. Suzanne says if you say, Susan, we.

Andrew Walsh (41:56)

Are through Dunnsville over strong feelings on this, we're just saying I would never.

Luke Burbank (42:03)

Do you like that, Suzanne. Because my mom is named Susan, I'm very. I'm Suzanne versus Susan is one I'm very keyed in on. Yes, Suzanne says. Suzanne says. What an honor to have a dazzling message. I'm a PNW native and I've listened to since the radio days. Wow, Suzanne. I've also listened since the radio days, and I can tell you that's a long time. I would like to connect with tens who mountain bike. Well, don't connect with that one listener the other day who's stealing all the bikes in his neighborhood and getting rid of them.

Andrew Walsh (42:33)

Oh, right.

Luke Burbank (42:35)

I've been a distance runner for years and recently added mountain biking, so I can keep moving between runs, and I am hooked. And I have a full quiver of bikes. There are rad races all over our area. Cross country, enduro, downhill. I love racing, and I am training for Dirty Bloom 50 miler in May. I'm part of Crank Sisters. We organize social rides for all levels of rider that identify as female, all ages. I'm 58, for God's sake. And all skills. Search Crank Sisters to find Emba Evergreen Mountain Bike alliance to find rides. I lead rides at Black Diamond Open Space a few times a year. EMBA welcomes everyone. You can find me and my cool abstract art on Instagram @sjo. That's s as in Sam Sjorunner.

Andrew Walsh (43:29)

Okay.

Luke Burbank (43:29)

If you want to find Suzanne's art, it's Sjorunner. That's on Instagram. And any tens who ride, let's say, hey, out there. We're so lucky in the Pacific Northwest to have gazillions of miles of trails from super chill to full on gnarly. Send it.

Andrew Walsh (43:47)

Send it.

Luke Burbank (43:48)

Very cool. Is that something you think you've said in the last couple of years, have you ever full. Have you full sent it?

Andrew Walsh (43:53)

I've never. This is the first time being exposed to this.

Luke Burbank (43:57)

Are you familiar with full send culture?

Andrew Walsh (43:59)

No, I'm not.

Luke Burbank (44:00)

Full send is like, I don't know. That's exactly. It's kind of what Suzanne was saying. But, yeah, it's like if you know you're about to, like, I don't know, do a backflip off of a bridge into the water or do something that's kind of scary and sketchy, but you're trying to psych yourself up, you just go, full send, man.

Andrew Walsh (44:16)

That's the same before you do it.

Luke Burbank (44:18)

Yeah. Or you might say, all right, man, this is a full send, bro. I'M a. This is a. I'm gonna send it fully on this.

Andrew Walsh (44:23)

That is weird that I haven't heard of it, because I put myself in those positions a lot.

Luke Burbank (44:27)

That's the thing. They must use different terms.

Andrew Walsh (44:29)

Yeah. In Seattle, it's just a little different. Yeah.

Luke Burbank (44:31)

By the way, I'm looking at Suzanne's art, and it's really cool. Like, Suzanne, you painted this. That's a full send right there.

Andrew Walsh (44:38)

Oh, now I'm looking at it, too. Look at these frames. Luke, you know that the.

Luke Burbank (44:44)

Suzanne, would you be willing to undercut the Michaels of Longview, Washington?

Andrew Walsh (44:48)

What a day for me. I'll bet you Suzanne does this framing, too. Wow. These are really, really great. Wow.

Luke Burbank (44:53)

Thank you, Suzanne. We really do appreciate you. Thanks for the support. Maestro, on your mark. On your mark.

Andrew Walsh (44:58)

Get set. Get set now.

Luke Burbank (45:00)

Ready, Ready, Go. Everybody rattle dazzle. Look who it is. It is our pal, John Takamoto. John of Kirkland, Washington. Just up the 405. I should say 405. Look at me. I'm showing my brief time in California, just up 405 from where Suzanne is.

Andrew Walsh (45:22)

I had something to say here. Oh, yeah, John, the real goat is what I was going to say. Right.

Luke Burbank (45:29)

Oh, actually, you know what? That's foreshadowing. I don't know if we're gonna get to it, but the reviews are in for that movie Goat that Stephen Curry is the producer of and an actor in.

Andrew Walsh (45:39)

You had a billboard for it outside of your room in New York City, I think. Right.

Luke Burbank (45:43)

I think I was talking Burbank, California.

Andrew Walsh (45:45)

Okay. Okay. Or close there, but either way, close to Burbank. That's how it entered our conversation.

Luke Burbank (45:49)

Yes. Because I thought. I thought it was weird that they put, like, produced by Steph Curry on there as an enticement, because I just thought, like, Steph Curry, phenomenal basketball player. I don't know what his movie production is, what those abilities are, but we've got more. You're right, though. John Takamoto is the OG Goat because.

Andrew Walsh (46:07)

He came to an event addressed as a goat man. He came to multiple events dressed as a goat man.

Luke Burbank (46:13)

I don't think that he even had to change into that outfit. Yeah, I think he was wearing it, and then he realized, oh, there's an event at Chateau St. Michel. I should get on down to to Chateau San Michelle for this TBTL hangout. And he just was in his normal, like, you know, Friday goat outfit.

Andrew Walsh (46:28)

You wear the goat long enough, sometimes.

Luke Burbank (46:31)

You wear the goat, sometimes the goat wires you. Do you remember the origin of that whole crazy thing, though.

Andrew Walsh (46:39)

I think I do. Let me try. And then you tell me where I'm getting it wrong. This was.

Luke Burbank (46:42)

I mean, there's a story. I couldn't remember the Houston Astros yesterday, Andrew. So let's not rely on me too heavily.

Andrew Walsh (46:47)

You knew Houston had a base.

Luke Burbank (46:49)

I kept thinking I was Andrew. I was on the drive home from the airport last night. I was replaying that moment in my mind. Oh, my God.

Andrew Walsh (46:55)

I didn't even remember.

Luke Burbank (46:55)

And it was like I kept just thinking Houston Oilers. Houston. I couldn't get past, you know, the old football name. Yeah. It was just like. And it was like the word Oilers was in front of a smaller word. Astros. I blame it on the size of the word, but it was like I just couldn't push through Houston Oilers to get to Houston Astros. It was very upsetting.

Andrew Walsh (47:14)

Honestly, I love that both of those teams and unironically, I truly love this about both of those teams. Teams. Although the Oilers rest in peace. And I know that we don't want to maybe celebrate the oil industry. Having said that, I love industry related teams. And the Astros really.

Luke Burbank (47:29)

Uniforms were sick.

Andrew Walsh (47:31)

Both uniforms are sick.

Luke Burbank (47:33)

Powder blue.

Andrew Walsh (47:33)

Yeah.

Luke Burbank (47:34)

Look up some old, like. Look up some old Houston Oilers. When they were like, when. I think they called the stadium the House of Pain. They had like Warren Moon and.

Andrew Walsh (47:42)

Yeah.

Luke Burbank (47:42)

Was it like Webster Slaughter?

Andrew Walsh (47:44)

No, he was. Anyway, unless he moved over there later. But. Yeah, but I do like. And then the Astros do it, right. Like, all about this, you know, the space industry, which, you know, is. It's. It's pretty localized. You know what I mean? Like Texas oil in space. And then they have their. Isn't Orbit the name of their mascot or whatever? But anyway, yeah.

Luke Burbank (48:03)

Who I also like as a mascot.

Andrew Walsh (48:04)

Although I loved that he got booed at the All Star game here in Seattle because of the rivalry between the two. I just. I've never seen a mascot get booed by tens of thousands of people before. It was amazing. Here's what I think I remember, and I think that this story predates me on tbtl. I think it was you and Jen and Sean doing the show and there was a story about a mystery man who was like, kind of caught on camera scrambling around, dressed up like a goat, but spending time with goats in the mountains somewhere. And people were like, who is this mysterious goat man? And then you had an event and listener John decided to dress as the goatman for that event.

Luke Burbank (48:43)

You are very right there, Andrew.

Andrew Walsh (48:45)

Look at me.

Luke Burbank (48:45)

The mystery of Utah's goatman.

Andrew Walsh (48:48)

Utah, right? Yes.

Luke Burbank (48:49)

A mysterious man spotted earlier this month dressed in a goat suit on a Utah mountain has been identified as a Southern California hunter preparing for an archery hunt of mountain goats.

Andrew Walsh (49:01)

The.

Luke Burbank (49:02)

The elusive man turns out to be a 57 year old hunter from Southern California. He remains unidentified. The thing that was so crazy about it was you had this photographer who was out on a hike in Utah, like, and then was in presumably a pretty, you know, off the beaten track area, and then just looks over and just sees on a different hillside a guy dressed as a goat on all fours, just like out, you know, in this very rural area. And it's like, that's the part that just. I would have thought that I had wandered upon some kind of a sex culture. Sure. Like, yeah, just be the weirdest. Like, we're not talking about some performative improv everywhere shit where it's like, you know, we're talking. We're not talking about Santarchy or something where people are being random and funny, but for like public observance. We're talking about a person in the middle of nowhere doing some weird stuff purely for their own yayas.

Andrew Walsh (49:52)

Yeah. And he has one key and it unlocks one P.O. box.

Luke Burbank (49:56)

Precisely. That's the kind of BDSM Andrew can get behind. Anyway, that's what John dressed up as famously. John's also famous for. I don't know if he's still doing it because I don't know how to get back on the Facebook page. But at one point, always being the person on the Stens page, the first person to let everyone know that the show was in fact posted on a given day. And then also just being a generally awesome person. That's our friend John Takamoto. He says, I'd like to thank the Bidness boys, Luke, Andrew and John for the wonderful work they do in giving listeners top notch topics and conversations. And that was before he knew I was going to read the summary of account activity from my Michaels situation. Although this may be my last time donating since being retired a few years ago, I made the difficult decision to step down as admin of the Stens page. It was loads of fun maintaining it, but it's time for new administrators to take over and take care of watching over it. Plus, I may have angered the guys sometimes. I don't know if John angered us, but I do think it was funny. There were times where I was not able to access the page.

Andrew Walsh (50:59)

Yeah, no, I don't.

Luke Burbank (51:00)

Can't be too careful.

Andrew Walsh (51:00)

No, I don't think that we can Access. Oh, maybe that. That's. Yeah, I don't. I don't remember. I can't imagine either one of us ever being angered by John. John.

Luke Burbank (51:07)

No, no, it's a possibility.

Andrew Walsh (51:09)

I'm being quite serious about that.

Luke Burbank (51:11)

Yeah. No, John, we love you and your aces by us. I'm still a loyal listener since the cooking in the Cairo FM studio incident where a former afternoon host got upset over the air, which by my count, was one of the funniest incidents ever. One thing I'd like to see in the future is that I hope you'll get Sean Detorre on. You know, I was just texting with Sean Dettori the other day. We should get him back on the show. So he's doing well.

Andrew Walsh (51:33)

He sounds great. I hear him on the radio a lot.

Luke Burbank (51:35)

And we're about to enter in. I mean, the Seahawks kind of. Although I don't listen to the Seahawks on the radio as much as I listen to the Mariners on the radio. But we're entering a prime dottore time for me, which is lots of baseball listening and hearing him in various reads on that station.

Andrew Walsh (51:50)

Fibromyalgia.

Luke Burbank (51:51)

Oh, I haven't heard that one. Yeah, yeah, I'm hoping you'll get Sean Detor on the podcast sometime to let us know what he's been up to. Thanks, guys. Powahatan out.

Andrew Walsh (52:01)

Nice.

Luke Burbank (52:01)

Powahatan is a. Was a Native American person, right? Powatahan.

Andrew Walsh (52:08)

I don't know. I wasn't sure what that was referencing.

Luke Burbank (52:10)

Oh, I guess it's a tribe. The. The Powah, The Pow Hatton. I think it's Powhatan are an Algonquin speaking Native American confederacy of 30 plus tribes. Okay, so not just a tribe, but a confederacy of tribes in Virginia's Tidewater region. So either John is making a reference to the Powhatan tribe, confederation of tribes. Or it autocorrected on him.

Andrew Walsh (52:35)

Yes. Or a cat got on the keyboard.

Luke Burbank (52:37)

Also very possible. Do you know how obsessed Bubbles is with specifically the keyboard of Mike? My computer or. I know Bingo's obsessed with your computers, but I think in a more sort of reasonable way, which is that Bingo wants to watch birds.

Andrew Walsh (52:52)

He engages with the content. Yeah. Sometimes he tries to reach onto the keyboard, but I always have to say, no, no, no. But then he just sits here like a little gentleman right to my right, staring at his birds.

Luke Burbank (53:03)

Whereas Bubbles, she's no lady. She just like, if you're typing on the computer, she just wants to start walking across the keys. Anyway, that might have been what happened to John. Not sure. John, thank you so much. We just have really appreciated your friendship and support in all these different ways over the years. So I'm glad you're still listening.

Andrew Walsh (53:27)

Hello and welcome to Top Story.

Luke Burbank (53:30)

As we already referenced a lot today actually on the topic of goats. I saw that billboard when I was in California because it was right outside of my hotel room. I found it to be surprising that they were promoting. You pointed out, because I think you started researching the movie a little bit, that Steph Curry, of course, Golden State Warrior, great, Was also an actor in this movie called Goat. The sign I saw said produced by Steph Curry. And my thought on that was like, you know, I absolutely would be fascinated to watch Steph Curry do something basketball related. And I am. When he's playing, I don't know if movie production is really his deal. And I may have been onto something there. This is the review today in the Seattle Times. Actually an Associated Press piece from Mark Kennedy. Goat review. Animated basketball movie is a disappointing airball. What I was really struck by was the opening line of the piece of the review of. So basically the plot of Goat Andrew is you've got an actual goat who. This is an animated movie, obviously. You've got an actual goat who's named Will, who's voiced by somebody from the Stranger Things universe, an actor named Caleb McLaughlin. And the idea is there's this game that is played in this world of this movie that I think is called roarball. Some kind of like, it's sort of basketball, it's like a mad maxi kind of basketball thing. Except this guy, this goat, is considered too small to play roar ball. And then of course has to learn, you know, to overcome the odds or something.

Andrew Walsh (55:06)

And then he's being terrible at it. And the lesson is.

Luke Burbank (55:10)

Yeah, the lesson is never try.

Andrew Walsh (55:11)

Yeah.

Luke Burbank (55:11)

Because honestly probably. Yeah. Then, you know, people probably know what they're talking about when they tell you you're too small to play roar ball.

Andrew Walsh (55:18)

Exactly.

Luke Burbank (55:19)

Here's from Mark Kennedy, opening line. You'd expect an animated basketball movie with four time NBA champion Steph Curry as the producer to be an easy layup. So why is Goat such a brick? To which I would say, Mark Kennedy, do you have. Why did you.

Andrew Walsh (55:34)

Why do you expect.

Luke Burbank (55:35)

Why would you.

Andrew Walsh (55:38)

Because it was produced by a guy who's really good at basketball.

Luke Burbank (55:40)

Yeah. You would expect a lasagna made by four time NBA champion Steph Curry to be one of the best lasagnas you've ever had. What? Excusezezez moi. No, I assumed the opposite. And Was correct.

Andrew Walsh (55:54)

Apparently you'd expect a lasagna made by a cartoon panda to be the best you've ever had.

Luke Burbank (56:02)

I mean, I feel like this is exactly what I was pointing out with the billboard, which is like, this does not seem to be Steph Curry's area of expertise. Again, awesome dude, Great basketball player. I think force for good in the world. I'm a big fan, but I would never expect a movie produced by Steph Curry to be good. The funny thing that I also, I don't have it in front of me, but I read, for some reason, I've been really locked in on this movie, Goat Andrew, and the discourse around it. I saw some article in the SF Gate the other day that was like, will Steph Curry become an actor? Like, and it was like, you know, because he's like, he turns in a performance in goat or something that's, like, surprising or like. And I was like, oh, okay, I saw that headline. And I was like, well, that's interesting. So maybe he's really good at acting or something. And then what the whole article ended up being was like, some reporter for the San Francisco SF Gate was at the premiere, which very much smacked of, like, Steph Curry paid a lot. I'm not trying to roast Steph Curry, by the way. Again, I really like the guy. I think he seems like a totally sweet dude. But it. It very much felt like a premiere of this movie that was heavily underwritten by Steph Curry. Like a theater and an event space rented out and, you know, like, kind of like a. Like, this is me. And by the way, it'll be really interesting to see what the box office numbers are. I could see definitely one of two things. I could see it not doing very well at the box office, or I could see it being like a runaway hit. Like, I have no idea which one of these movies that are aimed at young people are gonna, like, become a phenomenon and which ones aren't. So. And honestly, if it became a big hit, I would be happy because I like Steph Curry. And I'm sure, you know, I have. I'm not rooting for this movie to fail, but what the. This article about, like, is Steph Curry planning on becoming a serious actor? Was like. Because somebody on that, like, horrible step and repeat, which is like, you know, that kind of red carpety thing, or if it's Metallica black carpet, where I don't. Most of our listeners have not had the experience of being on or near one of those things, but they are just absolutely brutal. They Are my least favorite place on the planet. Because they are set up in such a way to create the impression when you see the photograph later online, that there was a big glitzy to do. But 90% of the people who are being brought through are not themselves famous. They are. But you have to like act all excited that they're gonna deign to stand in front of you for 10 seconds so you can take a picture. They also hand out. I don't know if I told you this about the red carpet. They will hand out this whole briefing sheet. Like the PR people, the comms people will hand you this like 20 page printout with photos and then a description of who the people are so that you will know whose name to yell out to try to get their attention. Because you don't know their name because they're not Steph Curry.

Andrew Walsh (58:58)

That's Chase dreams. That's who it usually is.

Luke Burbank (59:01)

Can you just say when you're jamming.

Andrew Walsh (59:03)

Bagel Bites, when you're jamming out, you love to eat Bagel Bites. Do you think that the confusion, though is because traditionally film producers are really good at basketball? Like the, you know, like Harvey Weinstein was famously really good at basketball.

Luke Burbank (59:19)

Absolutely.

Andrew Walsh (59:20)

Had absolutely Spielberg huge one. Tom Hanks, amazing. And so I wonder if they just assumed that it would translate the opposite way too.

Luke Burbank (59:31)

Most film producers are exceptional basketball players. And you're right. So I guess that that does sort of stand to reason.

Andrew Walsh (59:38)

That's probably what happened there.

Luke Burbank (59:39)

But basically this whole article that I read that was like, is Steph Curry, like, is he gonna become a really serious actor? It was some low level producer on the film being asked if Steph Curry's acting was good in the film that Steph Curry paid for.

Andrew Walsh (59:52)

Yeah, well, any headline that is a question is bullshit.

Luke Burbank (59:56)

Well, that's. That's a. That's. You're absolutely right about that. Because you'd think having been at least journalism adjacent all these years, I would have known that. But you're absolutely right. Like, there was. This was. It was. It was rank speculation of the rankest form.

Andrew Walsh (60:09)

Yeah. It ranks all the way over here.

Luke Burbank (60:11)

It was like you asked you, you. That is illogical. Ensign Odors cannot move through the vacuum of space. Like you asked a person who's getting their paycheck from Steph Curry if they thought Steph Curry did good acting.

Andrew Walsh (60:26)

Right, right. In a bullshit.

Luke Burbank (60:27)

And they said, yes, he did good acting.

Andrew Walsh (60:30)

Yeah. I'm looking to see at the Seattle Times because I love getting angry at their headlines. Their headlines say less and less. And they're all clickbaity. I will say there are no question marks except for one. Okay, here's a headline that actually ends in a question mark that I think is actually pretty good. And the headline is. And I started reading this the other day. I did not finish it because I'm a busy man. Just how many people took light. Oh, this is the light rail one. It says just how many people took light rails. Parade day. No, I saw one that wasn't about light rail specifically, but the headline was.

Luke Burbank (61:03)

The number 1 million.

Andrew Walsh (61:04)

Yeah, like, where did the city of Seattle come up with the number of 1 million people showing up for the parade? And I think it was by Mike Varrell. Right. I think it was somebody on the sports team who actually did. I could be wrong.

Luke Burbank (61:16)

They need to get Gene Bulk on the.

Andrew Walsh (61:18)

Yeah, I know.

Luke Burbank (61:19)

That's an FYI guy job.

Andrew Walsh (61:21)

Absolutely. Seems like a bulky kind of feature. Maybe he's working on it too. I love me some Gene Ball, but they were kind of like, you know, a lot of, like, both governmental organizations, as well as the Seahawks themselves were estimating crowd size at between like 3/4 of a million and a million people coming out. But basically, somebody just being like this just doesn't pass the sniff test. Like, where did these numbers come from? And they're still waiting. I guess the city or maybe the county will have a more specific estimate of who showed up in a couple of days. But basically the writer was like, we don't want to wait for this official report in a few days. So we're doing some back of the napkin math on this, which I kind of really appreciated. But it does seem like for. I was gonna say some reason, maybe obvious reasons, everybody was sort of exaggerating the turnout at this parade, it would appear.

Luke Burbank (62:12)

I will say this, and I don't think that this in any way, like, solves the question of if it was a million people or not. But, like, after you and I spent yesterday kind of being like, well, you didn't go to it. And I was like, I probably would have not gone to it. And then I was a little bit in my head about that. Like, did we yuck some yums maybe? But then I saw some kind of a clip online of. Of, you know, one of. I forget which Seahawk it was, but they were just, like, sort of coming out on. This wasn't in the stadium either. It was somewhere else. Maybe it was where the parade ended. You said it was like, near Pike Place Market or something. Maybe.

Andrew Walsh (62:43)

Yeah, it was a little Bit north of that. Yeah.

Luke Burbank (62:45)

Wherever it was, I gotta say, it was a lot of people.

Andrew Walsh (62:49)

Yeah.

Luke Burbank (62:49)

I don't think it was a million people, but it was a shitload of people. Like, it was. I would have been pretty psyched if I were one of the Seahawks to walk out there and. And see all of those people celebrating the victory. It was kind of. That one shot, I have to say, was pretty impressive.

Andrew Walsh (63:04)

You know, it's funny, I lived in my head a little bit yesterday, too, about that, about our conversation about me deciding not to go to the parade because one of our blurs days was a blurs day message to somebody who said, we had such a great time at the parade or we're looking forward to the parade. I can't remember when it was set up, and I was like, oh, well, gee, I hope I didn't like damper that kid's blurs day by saying I didn't go to the parade. But here's the deal, and this is the truth of the matter.

Luke Burbank (63:26)

He may have improved his birthday by not being there.

Andrew Walsh (63:28)

The fact that the parade happened brought me joy. Like, this is my. We've talked about this in life before, and it's a sad. It's definitely a sad admission on my part, but I want things happening in my city. I like being nearby them. I had a wonderful day in part, in large part because the city was on a sort of sports holiday. It's not necessarily for me to be there, just like it's not for me to be at various kinds of social events and large gatherings. But that wasn't like, oh, parades are dumb. Parades are awesome. I'm glad that the city had that day, and I'm glad that I could tangentially and sort of apart, kind of enjoy it. No joke. Like, I got so much joy from driving around town. I told you. I was running errands, and I saw a bunch of people of all different kinds of demographics wearing various degrees of Seahawks, you know, clothing or T shirts or carrying flags. And every time I saw it, it brought me joy. Later that evening, around 4:45 or something, I looked out my kitchen window and I saw a small family, like maybe three people, but the kid was holding a giant Seahawks flag like they had just gotten back from the parade. I loved all of that. I loved seeing it. I just didn't want to be in the heart of things.

Luke Burbank (64:43)

Yeah, that's fair. And again, honestly, you may have improved the experience of the people who went to the parade.

Andrew Walsh (64:50)

By not being there.

Luke Burbank (64:51)

Yeah, by not being there one Less person. You're very grouchy. Sharp elbows.

Andrew Walsh (64:58)

Yes.

Luke Burbank (64:58)

Very unaware of where you are in space. We don't have to talk. Whatever. Chipotle. I thought it was an interesting. I know we need to probably move on, but I thought this was an interesting article about Chipotle raising their prices.

Andrew Walsh (65:14)

Uh huh. I saw this because.

Luke Burbank (65:16)

Did you, did you see that? The rationale, or at least the, the. I guess the justification for raising their prices is that they have figured out that a significant portion of their customer base earns over $100,000 a year. By the way, talk about the quiet part loud. We've figured out that we, that people who buy our stuff might actually earn a living wage. And so we think we can soak them for more money. Chipotle is bumping prices in response to core customers who make at least $100,000. This was in the Oregonian, written by Veronica Nocera. And the amount that they're raising, the prices seems kind of small to me. They're raising their plan to raise their prices by 1 to 2% this year to combat dragging sales. I mean, I guess that's a way to combat them in that you will bring in more money per purchase. But don't you also think that raising, like if you're not, if you're not making enough money, do you think raising the prices is going to be, is going to be the solution?

Andrew Walsh (66:21)

Well, here's my theory on this. In. My God, Luke, am I out over my skis on this? So please, like just give me a short leash here. But I'm kind of showing my work a little bit. I made a joke or maybe this is wrong word. Quick reference to what everybody's talking about this K shaped economy. And I kept on hearing that, I had a vague idea of what it meant, but I actually kind of looked it up because this story, and the story also references another company sort of doing the same thing. And I think, think, I think that is the answer to this. Right? They are speaking to their shareholders.

Luke Burbank (66:52)

Dollar Tree is the other company.

Andrew Walsh (66:54)

Dollar Tree. Right. And they're speaking to their shareholders and they're saying, listen, we are adjusting to the marketplace. And how they're adjusting to the marketplace is the idea that people who are earning about a hundred thousand dollars or more. Like I think, is that a household income 100,000 or is that, I think, individual. Right. Average household income over a hundred. Those folks are spending more. They're actually, compared to recent years, they're actually spending more. And people who are making below 75 or 50 I think are spending less. And so if you chart that out, it looks like kind of two lines that are like the lines of a K coming out. And so to me. And again, I am so. Is just so the wrong person to be weighing in. But I think this is them telling their shareholders, we see what is happening in the general marketplace and in the economy, and we are responding to this particular economy by saying if the people who are over 100k are in a spending mood, we are appealing to them. And they even mentioned. I was in Chipotle the other day.

Luke Burbank (67:54)

Well, appealing to them, I guess. Except they don't.

Andrew Walsh (67:56)

Or not appealing to them, you're right. Like actually targeting them. Targeting.

Luke Burbank (67:59)

Yeah. We're assuming that they'll roll with the price increase because what's not part of this, by the way, I agree with everything you're saying. I don't mean to cut you off.

Andrew Walsh (68:06)

Well, let me just finish one thing there. One thing that I was going to say there. Appealing to them is like, there was one line in there about, like, a food that is fresh and.

Luke Burbank (68:14)

Yeah, I was going to read you that.

Andrew Walsh (68:15)

Yeah. Okay. That. Because I do think in that way they are appealing to sort of a tech bro. There's something about their protein bowls. I noticed they have. They're calling them protein bowls now, and it does sort of seem a little like, you know, 2026, like, just tinged with Maha, like sort of like it's.

Luke Burbank (68:31)

The year of protein.

Andrew Walsh (68:32)

Yeah. And so in a certain way, they are quote, unquote, appealing, as I said a moment ago, I think. Or trying to.

Luke Burbank (68:38)

Well, kind of. Although what? I guess. I mean, yeah, I'm going to read you that quote because it. Honestly, I. Something inside me died when I read this because it's so bad. It's so corporate speak. But, like, I mean, it sounds like what they're saying is we think that enough of our customers are in a household that can afford it that we can jack the prices a little bit and they're not going to stop coming here. But what they're not proposing is like, we're going to make the veggies fresher. We're going to make the. Like, we're going to. We're going to charge a premium price. We're going to offer a premium product. That's specific. Here's what he said. We learned that 60% of our. This is the CEO Scott Boatwright on an earnings call. He said, we learned that 60% of our core users are over $100,000 a year in average household income. That gives us confidence that we can lean into that group in a more meaningful way. Lean into our pockets, I guess. Quote, their grounded purpose aligns with our North Star as a brand around clean food, clean ingredients, high protein. He said about this younger, higher income demographic. So what I'm not hearing there is like we're gonna raise the prices but we're gonna improve the experience for these people. I think he's just saying these people are also obsessed with eating protein and so we think we can raise it by 2%. They're not gonna notice. That's what I get from that.

Andrew Walsh (69:54)

And sort of lean into I think though the protein bowliness of it and like at least from a marketing perspective. Because what's the alternative here? If you are talking about and if this is based on the fact income group is spending more and one income group is spending less. What you might have seen in other eras depending on the economy was deep discount value meals. Right. Like, and so, but then that changes sort of the reputation that you have both in the marketplace and in the eyes of consumers. Like am I going to go to the jack in the box where I can get like 400 tacos for 25 cents total? And you know what I mean? It's like, well, this is how we're going to react to the marketplaces. We're just going to continue to try to, to get people who have stopped buying to come to us because we offered value deals. But you run the risk of seeming like a cheapo, gross organization. Right. So instead they're saying we're going after these high earners by maintaining our sort of reputation as being, you know, fast casual.

Luke Burbank (70:50)

Yeah, I was in Chipotle in LA the other day getting my little kind of lunchtime thing and you know, it seemed fairly, fairly well attended, I guess. But it was amazing how many people. Now we were talking about this the other day with like use. Are you going to use the McDonald's app? Like it's amazing. I was like the only person who had not pre ordered something on the app. Like I was like a dinosaur in there ordering like to the person like a, like a, like an, you know, like some kind of, I don't know, artifact going, yeah, can I have the lettuce? Can I have the salad with the this and the that and the extra. I also, also, I'll tell you what, like what, here's what I did not notice when I was in there. I'm not saying that you're wrong about this, Andrew. I'm saying I didn't Track this. But you're totally right about this being their play. The whole friggin protein thing. Yeah, like that's, that's what they've got to latch onto because I think we're gonna. Years from now we'll look back and we'll go, remember when we all lost our mind around protein? Like, I mean, I'm sure that there's some medical science behind it. I'm sure, you know, protein is, is something people need, et cetera. I don't know enough about it, but like as of, like a year or two, as of two years ago, I swear to God we were not constantly analyzing how much protein was in it and everything. And now maybe we just didn't know about this and now we figured it out and now that's the only thing we should care about is protein. Or we might be dealing with a fad here.

Andrew Walsh (72:13)

Well, it's interesting because to me, I'm kind of surprised to hear you say that because I think of you as being part of the, the. Well, I'll just say it like sort of this was kind of fatty fat class. Yeah. Fad E. Well, no, no, but like the protein thing and the paleo diet. Diet and the cutting out of carbs and like replacing it more with high protein diets. That was something that, you know, a lot of people, including you, kind of got into with kind of a, a fresh approach, let's say 15 years ago or so, Right?

Luke Burbank (72:42)

Yes. Although for me the protein thing was not because I was like, oh, I need to get more protein. It was because, well, if I can eat a steak, if I can eat a pile of bacon and get skinnier, I'll do it. Yeah, but that's.

Andrew Walsh (72:55)

Weren't a lot of people doing that. They're drinking white wine instead of beer, but then like going to town on meats.

Luke Burbank (73:00)

Yes, but my point is, I don't think that in those days the protein was being pitched as much as the goal in as much as the goal was to just not do carbs, which kind of left protein as the only, as the only alternative. Whereas now what I'm seeing is like every, every single bar, like it's a David bar. Are you getting enough protein and shake? My daughter keep, keeps telling me like I'm not the only one in my family who has a faulty memory because my daughter has told me three times in the last year, hey, you know, I used to think eggs had a lot of protein, but you know, they don't have that much protein. I'm like, yes, you Keep telling me that, like there's this protein for protein sake or Protein or perish. That's a show title. Protein or perish. Shout out to our folks in academia. I feel like the narrative around protein now is like, are you getting enough protein? And that's independent of how many carbs you're eating. It's not like, are you eating protein instead of carbs? Carbs. Whereas when I was doing like Atkins and stuff, definitely they were saying the high protein diet is the way to go. But the way it always felt to me was the high protein diet is the way to go because your body processes the protein differently. And what the protein isn't is carbs. And now it seems like even for people that aren't managing their carbs, they're just eating. It's like, okay, but did you get enough protein? As if we're all gonna, you know, drop dead from lack of protein. Now when I think most. Again, I'm not. Did I see a headline the other day that RFK Jr. Said he used to snort cocaine off of toilet seats?

Andrew Walsh (74:29)

Yeah, he was talking to, what's his name? Who's the long haired comedian? Podcast guy.

Luke Burbank (74:34)

Oh, Theo Vaughn.

Andrew Walsh (74:34)

Yeah, he was a. Theo Vaughn's podcast.

Luke Burbank (74:38)

Talk about a conversation. That must have been incredible. I'm no RFK Jr here, but like, so in other words, I don't know the much. Like actually I am, I am an RFK junior in that I am, I am wildly under qualified to be weighing in on how much protein to hold any position on this stuff.

Andrew Walsh (74:54)

Right.

Luke Burbank (74:55)

So I don't know, maybe we'll. Maybe we do need a crazy amount of protein. Maybe that's the only thing we should all be thinking about. But it's just, it's funny to watch the way that trends go. I definitely think that the trend of you gotta hydrate, you gotta hydrate, that's all that matter. Everything starts with hydration. And again there's. For most of these things, I think there's like a baseline like, yeah, we should. I think it's probably good to stay hydrated. It's good to drink some water. It's good, you know, that's a good thing. But what'll happen is something like that, that like, yeah, we should all try to drink a little bit more water. Becomes this an entire lifestyle framework of me buying a powder coated water thing because I saw Jonah Hill with it.

Andrew Walsh (75:36)

Yeah, right.

Luke Burbank (75:37)

And everyone talking about it. And then it's like water kind of moves off the. It kind of moves below the fold. Like hydration kind of moves down and now protein gotta get that. Protein kind of moves up and then it's like, I assume protein will kind of move away at some point and there'll be some new thing that. It's like if you're not doing this, it's just like you're, you know, your body hates you if you're not, whatever. You know, it's just so funny to watch these. Actually, the ultimate person to talk about this with would be Becca. Not because she's so faddish, but because her. Because she is an extremely fit person who exercises a lot. Her Instagram feed is wild to me because it is a totally different world that. Than the stuff that I get. Because it's just all for the health girlies. It's all for the, like, if you're not having sea. If you're not drinking sea foam or sea moss within your whatever and stuff. It's just like, it's so crazy to watch these things kind of rise and fall. As far as like the thing that you just. If you're not doing this right now, you're just absolutely crazy. You're killing yourself. If you're not it doing, doing this.

Andrew Walsh (76:39)

You know, shove a bunch of pork into one of those oversized water bottles, carry that around, give it time.

Luke Burbank (76:45)

If you're not. I'm sorry for the girlies who already bought one of these pork blenders because they're now on sale on the TikTok shop. If you're not blending your pork in the morning before you go home, don't worry about that. If you're not drinking a pork slurry for your pre workout, I'm sorry, but you're not getting your gains.

Andrew Walsh (77:03)

Here I go once again with the email. Every week I hope that it's from a female. Oh man, it's not from a female.

Luke Burbank (77:12)

All right, Some Friday emails or V mails.

Andrew Walsh (77:16)

Yeah, I'm going to play a voicemail for you or a voice memo for you because we're very modern here in just a moment. But first I want to mention this. We got a whole host of messages via social media, email, voicemail, etc. Text message from people who wanted to clear the reputation of a company called Iron Mountain. You knew Iron Mountain and referred to it briefly as a document destroying company. A company that would like, you know, securely destroy any sensitive information that you have. And you're like, what a funny name, Iron Mountain. Like that doesn't sound like a company that destroys things. And a lot of people want to let you know that Actually, their main thing is protecting and security, I think. And they also, as part of that service, destroy sensitive data. This is from Catherine. I'll read here. I know it's just a throwaway line in a longer conversation about hotels, but my archivist brain wouldn't let me go on without letting you know that Iron Mountain is actually primarily a document preservation company. Hence the name. And the digitization and destruction services were added as companies in the late 20th century began to have so much paper that indefinitely storing it became untenable, even with multiple large secure locations Iron Mountain has around the country. So I don't work for them, but I am their client. And I once had to explain to a building manager that they were not delivering water to my office. Office. Let's see here. I don't know why having a private water company deliver us would have been a problem, but that's a mystery for someone else to solve. So I don't quite get that.

Luke Burbank (78:46)

Can I just. Can I just chime in on that a little bit? So thank you for the clarification, everyone. And that does make the name Iron Mountain sound make a lot more sense, but can I just read you a quick graph? I'm on the Iron Mountain, like, Wikipedia page now. This is crazy. Does anybody reference this part of the story that you know of?

Andrew Walsh (79:02)

What? What part? Part.

Luke Burbank (79:04)

Well, I don't know the early days of this company. Because I don't want to steal any thunder.

Andrew Walsh (79:07)

No, that's all I have there. I mean, I got.

Luke Burbank (79:09)

Okay, because I know, I know Listener Matt. I think Listener Matt, like, works there.

Andrew Walsh (79:13)

Oh, okay. I got a couple of voice memos here.

Luke Burbank (79:15)

I think we got one. I think I saw Listener Matt. I didn't listen to it because I was getting on a plane, but I saw, like, a still shot or something of Listener Matt in an Iron Mountain hat. Like, I don't know if he was literally in an Iron Mountain truck at the time or what.

Andrew Walsh (79:27)

Here, let me play the shorter one, but you go ahead.

Luke Burbank (79:29)

Well, the founding in the early years of this company is wild. The company was started by Herman Knaust, who had made his fortune growing and marketing mushrooms. He purchased a depleted iron ore mine and 100 acres of land in Kingston, New York, for $9,000 in 1936. Needing more space to grow his product, so he buys this area to grow mushrooms. By 1950, the mushroom market had shifted, and Knauss was looking for alternative uses for his mine, which he had named Iron Mountain. Knaust saw a business opportunity amidst widespread Cold War fears in Protecting corporate information from nuclear attack and other disasters. The company was originally founded in 1951 as Iron Mountain Atomic Storage Corporation. It opened its first underground vaults in 1951. So basically it sounds like he had this mine that he didn't know what to do with. So he said, well, we could store sensitive stuff in here so it's safe from a nuclear attack.

Andrew Walsh (80:30)

But it was weirdly named Iron Mountain before it was any kind of safety or security related business at all. He named it Iron Mountain when it was still a mushroom concern.

Luke Burbank (80:39)

I'll just reread this. So I don't know. I think so. By 1950 the mushroom market had shifted and Knauss was looking for alternative uses for his mines which he had named Iron Mountain. So that sounds like he named it Iron Mountain when he was doing mushrooms.

Andrew Walsh (80:54)

Which makes even less sense. Why would you name a mushroom mountain? It was a mushroom shaped economy.

Luke Burbank (80:59)

Yeah, that's right. We're dealing with the. It's mostly Koopa troopers.

Andrew Walsh (81:02)

Okay, so I have problem. Matt sent in two voice memos. A long one and a short one. I'm going to play the short one. I have not listened to this yet.

Matt (81:09)

This is Matt from Tacoma again. I also forgot to mention that it was named Iron Mountain after the founder had bought an old iron ore mine in New York, I believe, and grew mushrooms in it initially. And when that didn't pan out, he offered it to store documents in the event of a possible nuclear attack. So I guess I kind of varied the.

Andrew Walsh (81:27)

I see. So it was because it was an iron ore mine originally is why I called it. It didn't have to do with the Koopa troopers.

Luke Burbank (81:34)

No. But now can we play Matt's first? So first of all, clearly we don't preview these things and I'm glad we didn't because I got to seem like the smart one delivering the news about the mushroom farm. But what I'm wondering is, can we listen to Matt's first message? I'm wondering if Matt works there because again, I think he's wearing an Iron Mountain hat in the first video. And now again, we have not previewed this, so we, we. We can't co sign whatever it is Matt's about to say. Keep it.

Matt (82:03)

Hey folks, this is Matt from Tacoma. Hey, regarding Iron Mountain, the company that you briefly referenced regarding that hotel changing hands. So in 2009, I was laid off from the company I'd worked for for 12 years for two and a half months. And so I had to find another gig and I got a gig with Iron Mountain. After being late for the interview and arguing with one of the interviewers, they still hired me. In all my years of being a blue collar dude, it's the most rigorous training I've had. They really instilled in us their methodology. And their deal is they are Iron Mountain Records Management imrm, and they basically store and retrieve documents for attorneys and major corporations and hospitals and everything. And their deal is security. If you leave the truck for any reason, the door is locked, the windows are up. Even in summertime, if you leave the back of the truck, you're anywhere not near it. You have to lock it at all times. They really hammered that home. You had your special id After a rigorous background check that every company they dealt with, except for two, used. It was pretty impressive training. At the end of training, they gave me this box of uniforms and everything and hats and shorts and jackets and all kinds of good stuff. I worked for them for four days, and my old company called me back, said, hey, we're ready to take you back. After they treated me like a redheaded stepchild. So I had to quit Iron Mountain after five days, and I returned all my stuff, except for I accidentally kept a Thinsulate beanie. And I found out later, but I wasn't too unhappy about it because it's pretty cozy. Cozy. So power out.

Andrew Walsh (83:37)

And that is the hat that he's wearing in the photo.

Luke Burbank (83:39)

After you work at Iron Mountain, when you leave, you have to shred all of the clothes they gave you.

Andrew Walsh (83:44)

You have to burn.

Luke Burbank (83:45)

Yeah, you have to shred the hat. You have to shred. Okay. That's also really fascinating to me, like, the security around it, you know, for. For obvious reason. I wonder what the Iron Mountain rules would be about storing documents in, like, a bathroom, you know, or multiple bathrooms.

Andrew Walsh (84:00)

You mean in a.

Luke Burbank (84:02)

Possibly in a very humid, notoriously humid place like Florida. What about a bathroom in Florida?

Andrew Walsh (84:07)

Swampy. Swampy bathroom. Yeah.

Luke Burbank (84:08)

Would that be considered proper document retention?

Andrew Walsh (84:11)

Can I ask you a question that seems completely unrelated?

Luke Burbank (84:14)

That's fine.

Andrew Walsh (84:15)

How gilded is this bathroom? On a scale of 1.

Luke Burbank (84:19)

On a scale of 12 Caligula threw up in there?

Andrew Walsh (84:23)

Yes. Answer me that. Answer me that. All right. Hey, listen, I just want to play one quick voice memo for you. Yeah.

Luke Burbank (84:31)

Hey, Matt, thanks for the call, buddy.

Andrew Walsh (84:32)

Yeah, that was good. We're going to go from mat to Maddie. I got this yesterday. It was from. Okay, can I do this? I'm pretty now. I'm saying Maddie here. The email came in from a Madeline, but I think that she goes By Maddie. Right? And from too. Willa. Am I saying it? Is it to. Is it?

Luke Burbank (84:47)

Yeah.

Andrew Walsh (84:48)

Tuilla, Utah, I believe. Part of our, part of our. Part of the Palmers crew.

Luke Burbank (84:52)

Yes, yes, the Palmers of Utah. None of whom by the way, can account for where they were when that goat man was spotted in the hills of Utah. And I think that's something that we need to look into a little bit.

Andrew Walsh (85:05)

I will do some research. But anyway, Maddie left us this voicemail after hearing about how I bowed out of going to the parade the other day.

Maddie (85:13)

Hey, Andrew, I just wanted to say that I totally understand that the whole Seahawks parade thing because when I was studying abroad in Barcelona last summer, they had this big parade after winning on like some big soccer game. I'm not really certain what because I don't really follow soccer and some of the people in my class went and it was definitely like a once in a lifetime opportunity because I don't know, like if I'll ever go back to Barcelona. It was my only time studying abroad and like, who knows if they'll win this thing next time in Barcelona. And instead I took a nap because I was just kind of tired. So at least I did something semi productive instead of the Seahawks brain. But yeah, power out.

Andrew Walsh (85:55)

My favorite part about that was I took a nap because I was kind of tired. It was not even like, well, because I had college life for you about it because I had, you know, I was jet lagged or whatever. Just like, you know what, the parade sounds nice, but also I'm kind of tired. I might just take a nap. I am with you. I would have made the same exact choice as you well know.

Luke Burbank (86:14)

See, that's what's so great about this show is that the Mattys of the world.

Andrew Walsh (86:18)

World.

Luke Burbank (86:18)

And the Andrews of the world can bond over. Over, you know, your, your decisions that you make. Like, like, you know, she, she totally got exactly why. Why you didn't feel like going.

Andrew Walsh (86:29)

Thank you for validating me as a.

Luke Burbank (86:32)

Young person and if you want to, if anybody out there wants to validate me for being a young, fun, cool person who's definitely not napping this afternoon has definitely not already considered the exact plan for the nap.

Andrew Walsh (86:43)

How many times have you thought about that nap since we've been talking?

Luke Burbank (86:47)

Honestly, I started thinking about food at some point because something got brought up that made me think I got a door dash that. What were we talking about earlier with. That was a food related Lasagna maybe.

Andrew Walsh (86:58)

A lasagna I might get.

Luke Burbank (86:59)

I love Fridays and lasagna Andrew, I.

Andrew Walsh (87:02)

Truly do love Chipotle. I think that maybe. That maybe sealed the deal for me. I'm going to go get some Chipotle. I'm. I'm struggling.

Luke Burbank (87:07)

Are you willing to pay 1 to 2% more?

Andrew Walsh (87:09)

I am. I'm worried about the TBTL newsletter today. I wrote, I started it yesterday and I wrote a couple of opening sentences that are some of my favorite opening sentences for a newsletter. But I literally have no idea where to take it from there. I just wrote them without any grand plan. And now I'm just wondering.

Luke Burbank (87:29)

You were mad Manning.

Andrew Walsh (87:30)

I was mad Manning, but now I don't want to bring in the editor. And also, though, I just don't have anything else. I don't just have a greeting.

Luke Burbank (87:36)

Well, that could be. What about this? What if this week it's just madmanning? It's just the before.

Andrew Walsh (87:41)

Just throw everything at or just throw everything at.

Luke Burbank (87:44)

Basically just madman the whole thing. And then don't go back and develop it into anything. Just send out a madman message.

Andrew Walsh (87:51)

Well, I need to make sure that the message today does not include any, like, links. Last week I tried to put all these links in, but I'm going to keep it linkless except for your hey dummies video. And we're going to see if we can get that past the Internet sensors this week.

Luke Burbank (88:05)

It's too. If you want to realize in real time that I've been drinking full sugar root beer, this is the video for you. All right. All right. Hey, that's going to bring us to the end of our broadcast week. Thank you everyone for listening along with us and spending all this time in TBTL land. We're going to be right back here on Monday with more imaginary radio for you. So come on by for that. In the meantime, have a great weekend, everybody. Stay safe. And please remember, no mountain too tall.

Andrew Walsh (88:30)

And good luck to all me.

Maddie (88:36)

Power out.