Co-host/Commentator (2:56)

Unless it's Code Red.

Tech News Host (2:58)

It is. Then It's a lot AMD's beastly Strix Halo APU has arrived in another handheld, the Aya Neo Nex 2. But unlike existing Strix Halo handhelds, this one doesn't need an external battery or external validation. She knows who she is, and that's a handheld with a massive 116 watt hour internal battery. It's bigger than most gaming laptop batteries and could even cause you trouble at the so that's how you know it's bad.

Co-host/Commentator (3:25)

They won't take me.

Tech News Host (3:26)

You're gonna have to pat me down. The next two has some other impressive specs too, which I guess is partially why Ayaneo is okay with pricing the base model at US$2,700, although the early bird price on Indiegogo is 2,300 and that's expensive. But like this is a new generation flagship Windows handheld for the future masterpiece Beyond Imagination we're talking about here. And sure, you could also say that the other Strix Halo handhelds, the GPD Win 5 starting at 2,500 bucks, and the Onexplayer Onexfly Apex for 2,200 bucks, are also handheld for the future masterpiece Beyond Imagination, but they need external battery packs regardless. They're all too expensive. So hopefully soon we'll see handheld sporting those two new Strix Halo variants that AMD announced at CES 2026 with fewer CPU cores but the same graphics power as the flagship Ryzen AI Max Plus 395, which could end up being a bit cheaper. I think I might like one wearing a little battery backpack, though. I can imagine it's carrying its favorite treasures in there for me. That's our sponsor. Ha. Didn't see that one coming.

Co-host/Commentator (4:32)

Play Tracker Howdy partners. Out here in the west you gotta keep track of your herd, and PlayTracker does exactly that for your gaming library. This app rounds up all your games from Steam, Xbox, PlayStation, GOG and EA, so you can easily wrangle your whole collection. But it ain't just about the games. Earn XP level up and unlock rewards no matter where you play. Build yourself a Unified Profile, a monument to your gaming career, something that'll live on long after you hang up those spurs, track your stats with fancy graphs and connect with your posse across any platform. They've even got giveaways you can enter by completing challenges and clearing that backlog you've been ignoring. Heck, and it's built by a small outfit that's always happy to hear your feedback. Check out Playtracker for free using our link below and get your herd under control. Yee haw. This is what?

Tech News Host (5:28)

What is this? All right, we got the tech news out of the well, but what's that? The quick bits are down there now. God damn it. Intel may have canceled the release of its Core Ultra 9 290K Arrow Lake Refresh Desktop processor, and I don't really know whether to mourn its death or not because we only just heard about it today. So sad. Insider sour apparently told videocards.com of the cancellation, but said other Aeroleak refresh parts, a 270k plus and a 250k plus are still coming. And there is some weight to the Aerolink refresh rumor since Asus posted and deleted tweets about it featuring these images with graceful robot hands holding motherboards. They're coming for your hand model jobs. Somewhat reliable leaker HXL9550Pro claimed the embargo will lift on March 23rd in a tweet with a saddening lack of robot.

Co-host/Commentator (6:22)

Hands, or any hands at all.

Tech News Host (6:24)

At least you got a job, pal. Great news, everybody. They don't write these voices, and I just do those. They've added Copilot to the Windows 11 setup experience, so if you need to download a large update when booting your new PC for the first time, you can chat with Microsoft's helpful little harbinger of humanity's downfall and even ask it to generate images of yourself doing what you're doing, talking to a computer as if it's people, really. If you could please do anything with Copilot, Microsoft would love to tell their investors you guys did that once or twice. VPN provider Windscribe has claimed that Dutch authorities, who are the best authorities, seized one of their physical servers, just yanked it right out of the rack without a warrant, noting that because they use RAM disk servers, the cops won't find anything on there unless you count the unredacted EP styn files. Unfortunately, there doesn't appear to be any supporting evidence that this seizure actually happened other than Windscribe's own tweet leading some observers to be skeptical of the whole thing. The vibe is off. It's like dbrand did edgy marketing, so I can do it too. I'm not so sure. OpenAI is allegedly scaling back its first consumer hardware product, a pair of AI earbuds developed in partnership with Apple's famous designer Jony I've According to Twitter leaker Smart Pikachu. And a patent filing in China revealed that the earbuds will go to market under the name Dime, or Dime if you're Spanish. And while initially billed as a device with phone level computing power, it's now being scaled back to something more like regular earbuds. No, Smart Pikachu was apparently banned from Twitter for bringing us this information.

Co-host/Commentator (7:58)

I guess not so smart.

Tech News Host (8:00)

According to the post, soaring memory costs made the original bill of materials too expensive, so the enhanced features have been delayed. The memory crisis Tools for the Sam Olmen Speaking of X and losers, Elon Musk announced on x yesterday that SpaceX that's so many X's has shifted its near term focus from settling Mars to building a self growing city on the Moon. Whatever that means. This is a complete 180from Musk, who just last year called the Moon a distraction. Why they change your heart. In his tweet, Musk cites the moon's proximity as the reason for the shift, evidently only now realizing that Mars is farther from Earth than the Moon by a lot. Truly a genius of our time. Ars Technica made the point with the success of Jeff Bezos blue origin rocket flights and their team going all in on lunar exploration. Musk needs to get there first or risk losing the economic high ground. Also, the dick measuring contest. So much like shifting Tesla factories to robot production or pushing full self driving subscriptions to unlock his trillion dollar payback. For Elon, it's less about human advancement and more about getting that cake leaving no crumbs. I mean, what's the point of unleashing hordes of potentially murderous robots and cars onto the world if you can't even retreat to your own self growing moon city? If things go sideways, you have eight months to get to Mars.

Co-host/Commentator (9:19)

There's no point.

Tech News Host (9:21)

You need a self growing city. And Harvard engineers have 3D printed soft robots that bend, twist and grasp on command by embedding air channels directly into the material using a rotating nozzle. You pump air through the channels and the structure moves in whatever direction was programmed during printing. The team demonstrated a gripper with articulated fingers that curl around objects and a spiral actuator that unfurls like a flower. The team says they intend to use the technology for advanced surgical tools and wearable devices, and definitely not for sex. Unlike Moya Droid Up's new humanoid robot that the company is calling the world's first fully biomimetic robot, in which we're calling an obvious attempt to make a real life anime waifu. Somebody has to. But she's not Japanese. Riley like all the best waifus, moya walks with 92% human like accuracy. I'm willing to wager that 8% matters maintains a body temperature between 89.6 and 96.8 degrees Fahrenheit and has a bunch of promo videos that feature an unusually high number of shots of its ass.

Co-host/Commentator (10:22)

I ain't buying any robot with no ass.

Tech News Host (10:25)

And that's all the news we're pulling out of the well today. Come back Wednesday when the tech news inevitably falls back in. It is famously uncoordinated. Way too big of an ass wagon. Can't walk. Absolute rump. Lifelock how can I help?

Sponsor/Advertiser Voice (10:41)

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Co-host/Commentator (10:43)

But I haven't.

LifeLock Representative (10:44)

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Sponsor/Advertiser Voice (10:47)

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Tech News Host (10:48)

My refund though. I'm freaking out.

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Tech News Host (10:50)

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Sponsor/Advertiser Voice (10:56)

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Tech News Host (10:57)

No problem. I'll be with you every step of the way.

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