A simple solution to fix workplace miscommunication | Melissa M. Mikus

Summary

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TED Business Podcast: "A simple solution to fix workplace miscommunication"

Host: Modupe Akinola | Guest: Melissa M. Mekis
Date: July 20, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this episode, leadership expert Melissa M. Mekis delivers a practical solution to a widespread and costly problem: miscommunication at work. Drawing from personal stories and workplace research, Melissa argues that confusion and misunderstandings stem not just from what is said, but how it's communicated—and often, the fix is as simple as letting others know your preferred communication style. The host, Modupe Akinola, follows the talk with actionable advice to help listeners identify and share their own communication preferences to foster clearer, more effective collaboration.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The True Cost of Miscommunication

• Common Experience: Everyone has been both the giver and receiver of miscommunication at work. (Melissa M. Mekis, 04:54)
• Personal Anecdote: Melissa shares how a one-word reply (“Sure”) spun her team into confusion, wasted hours, and unnecessary rework because her intent wasn't clear.
  • Quote: “[My colleague] interpreted my ‘sure’ to mean ‘meh, this is okay, I guess.’ That simple ‘sure’ spun out my entire team.” (Melissa, 05:56)
• The Stakes:
  • 86% of employees and executives blame workplace failure on ineffective communication.
  • U.S. businesses lose $1.2 trillion annually due to miscommunication. (Melissa, 07:06)

The Simple Solution: Communication Style Tags

• The Idea:
  • Proactively share with others how you best communicate, and your communication preferences, via a "communication style tag".
  • This tag covers:
    1. Preferred mode of communication (e.g., email, phone, Slack)
    2. Workplace norms or personal parameters (e.g., best working hours, needing context in advance) (Melissa, 08:18)
• Implementation:
  • Add your "communication style tag" to email signatures, profiles, and internal directories for visibility.

Examples & Stories

• Personalized Tags Help Teams Thrive
  • Extrovert vs Introvert Dynamic:
    • Melissa, an extrovert, schedules an open brainstorming meeting with introvert teammate Kate—who is silent in the meeting, but later sends brilliant ideas over email.
    • Lesson: “This was a turning point for me. To be a leader of highly effective teams, you need to invest in understanding their communication styles and share your own as well.” (Melissa, 10:12)
    • Kate’s tag: “Email for fastest response during the day. Prefers written comms to enable thoughtful, clear responses.”
  • Avoiding Ghosting:
    • Mike never answered instant messages—not personal, but a deliberate choice to avoid distractions as an extrovert who enjoys live chats.
    • Mike’s tag: “Text for urgent matters; adaptive to communication styles but prefers live interaction.” (Melissa, 11:03)
  • Other Notable Tags:
    • Kelly: “Checks email twice daily. Agendas required.” (Melissa, 12:09)
    • Matt: “Email deep diver. Full context only.” (Melissa, 12:27)
    • Liz: “Voice memo enthusiast. Send brief messages for quick updates. Avoid long texts.” (Melissa, 12:47)
    • Louis: “Morning meeting maven. Books everything before lunch; afternoons are for thinking.” (Melissa, 13:00)

Why This Matters: Trust, Clarity, and Data-Driven Relationships

• Wider Applications:

  • These tags help not just at work but in personal life (e.g., planning trips with a partner who needs more advanced context).

• Data Mindset:

  • Communicating preferences is a form of sharing actionable data—leading to trust, better decisions, faster progress, and reduced strain. (Melissa, 13:54)

• Quote: “When we tell people how best to work with us, we not only increase communication effectiveness—we build trust. We move faster, we feel less strained, and we build teams that actually work.” (Melissa, 14:21)

Call to Action

• Go First:
  • Leaders and team members should model this practice. Share your tag, encourage others, and make it standard practice.
  • “Normalize it with your teams and do it in a highly visible way so that people have this information on a day to day basis. The more people that adopt this change, the more effective it will be.” (Melissa, 13:35)

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Host’s Mini-Lesson: How to Apply This in Your Life (16:23)

• Reflect on Your Preferences:
  • “What time of day do I like to have uninterrupted thinking time? What time do I prefer to have meetings? Do I prefer email, text, or talking over the phone? Do I like bouncing ideas off a group, or having a fixed agenda?” (Modupe, 16:44)
• Share and Solicit:
  • Pay attention to your modes of communication in the coming weeks.
  • Don’t be shy to inform your coworkers, friends, and even family about your preferences—and invite them to do the same.
• Notable Quote:
  • “There’s so much unnecessary guesswork and social error that goes into trying to backchannel what we actually need and want. What if you just came out and told people plainly what works best for you?” (Modupe, 16:27)

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Memorable Moments & Quotes

• “That simple ‘sure’ spun out my entire team.”
  – Melissa M. Mekis (05:56)

• “To be a leader of highly effective teams, you need to invest in understanding their communication styles and share your own as well.”
  – Melissa (10:12)

• “We can’t accommodate everybody’s preferences 100% of the time, but the information is knowledge that gives us power to make better choices and to adapt if possible.”
  – Melissa (10:40)

• “When we tell people how best to work with us, we not only increase communication effectiveness, we build trust. We move faster, we feel less strained, and we build teams that actually work.” – Melissa (14:21)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• [01:31] Start of Host’s Story & Episode Introduction
• [04:49] Melissa M. Mekis’ TED Talk Begins
• [05:56] The “Sure” story: Personal miscommunication experience
• [07:06] Hard data on workplace miscommunication costs
• [08:18] Introduction of the Communication Style Tag concept
• [09:30 - 13:00] Real-world examples of style tags on teams
• [13:54] Application to personal life and final thoughts
• [16:23] Host’s Mini-Lesson: How to apply style tags in your work/life

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Summary

This episode makes the case that most workplace friction and inefficiency springs from simple misunderstandings about how people best communicate. Melissa M. Mekis offers a low-cost, transformative fix: empower everyone to state their communication preferences up front through “style tags.” By embracing and normalizing this practice, teams can dramatically reduce misalignment, foster trust, speed up collaboration, and make workplaces more humane and productive. The host extends the lesson: reflect, experiment, and don’t be afraid to put your style out there—because telling people how to work with you not only makes life easier, it gives everyone the gift of clarity.

Transcript

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[Madupa Akinola]

If you call my cell phone and I don't pick up, you're guaranteed to get my voicemail greeting. It says if you're trying to leave me a message, I won't listen to it. I don't check this inbox. You can text me, you can email me, you can send me a note via carrier pigeon, but you can't reach me here. This has been the case for a while now. I was spending a lot of time fielding calls, being spammed, listening to voicemails and talking on the phone, and I realized that wasn't where I did my best or most direct communicating. And more than that, it was cutting into time I wanted to use for contemplating that quiet, uninterrupted zone where your mind can really chew on some difficult ideas. I decided that if people didn't know the best way to communicate with me, I should just tell them I'm Medupa Akinola. This is TED Business, a podcast from ted. Our speaker today is leadership expert Melissa M. Mekis, and she's here to say that miscommunication and misunderstanding in the workplace isn't just a nuisance. It's often expensive. But luckily she has a simple, effective solution to clearing up the chaos. A communication style tag. Then, after the talk, I'll ask you how you like to best communicate. But first, a quick break. This episode is brought to you by Pakka I'm always on the hunt for those staple pieces I can easily pack and know I'll be comfortable no matter what I'm doing. At this point, I don't travel anywhere without my Paca hoodie and original crew sweater. They're both made with the same care and unmistakable softness. Pakka creates outdoor and lifestyle apparel from alpaca fiber, one of the most sustainable natural fibers on the planet. Their signature hoodie is unbelievably soft, warmer than wool, yet still breathable enough to wear through whatever the day brings. It's built for real life, thermoregulating, odor resistant, durable, and made to last. And I'm not the only one who loves it. More than 250,000 people have already picked up theirs. Once you feel the quality of paca, you'll understand why people keep coming back. To grab your Paca hoodie, go to www.pakaapparel.com. that's www.pakaapparel.Com

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[Madupa Akinola]

And now Melissa M. Mekis takes the TED stage.

[Melissa M. Mekis]

So I'm sure everyone here has been on the giving or receiving end of a workplace communication failure. Is that fair? Well, I want to share a time when I sent a message to my team that created countless hours of wasted effort, a few sleepless nights, and maybe even some tears. That message was sure. Yep, that's it. One word, four letters. No punctuation, no emojis. Just sure. I bet you were expecting something a little bit more controversial or spicy. So here's what happened. My team was working on an important presentation for an upcoming board Meeting. And right on deadline, the project manager, Charlie, sent me an email with a presentation and said, are we okay to send this to the board chair for feedback? I reviewed the presentation that evening while simultaneously making dinner, but I was delighted. It was spot on. Key messages, graphics. So much so that I didn't even have any feedback. But as water is boiling over on the stove and my dog's trying to sell chicken off the counter, I just forgot to respond to the email. The next day, Charlie sends me a quick slack. Are we okay to proceed? I was on another call, but I didn't want to delay my response further, so I just said, sure. Well, the next morning, I checked my inbox and I have this detailed email from Charlie with a whole new presentation attached. And I was confused. I called him up on the phone and I said, hey, Charlie, what's going on? Defeated, he admitted that he interpreted my sure to mean meh. This is okay. I guess that simple sure spun out my entire team. And that's just one small example of miscommunication. But think about the bigger ones. How many times have you or your team gone down the wrong path on a project? Or felt frustrated by lack of progress? Or maybe even spent hours or days in a disagreement that wasn't even a disagreement in the first place? So you're not alone, because employees and executives, 86% of them, blame workplace failure on ineffective communication. And U.S. businesses alone lose $1.2 trillion trillion dollars a year as a result of miscommunication. So this isn't just about being nice and diplomatic. Miscommunication is expensive. It hurts employee morale, it stalls progress, and it increases turnover. So I want to provide a simple solution to address this. It's minimal effort. We all like that. You can do it today. And it's low cost, maybe even free. Are you ready? The best way to enhance communication effectiveness is to tell people how you best communicate and how best to communicate with you. It's pretty simple. But how do we do this in real time and in a way that the information is accessible to those that we engage with? So most of us have an email signature, social profile, an internal directory profile that typically includes name, title, contact information. What if we normalize adding another highly visible piece of information? A communication style tag that covers two critical pieces of information. One, how we best communicate email, phone call, text, slack, and any workplace norms you've set for yourself, like working hours or protected focus time. And two, how we show up as our best selves or avoid getting tripped up. For example, my communication style Tag thrives best in morning meetings. Provide detailed context in advance for fastest decision making. Now I want to share another story. Communication mishap, if you will. That'll show how I brought this into play with my team. A few years ago, I joined a fintech startup and my first task was to put together a strategic roadmap for the CEO. I didn't know much about the product yet, but lucky for me, brilliant woman named Kate on my team had worked at the company since day one, and I thought, I should talk to Kate now. I'm an extrovert. I love a brainstorm. Get in a conference room with a whiteboard, throw ideas against the wall. Let's see what sticks. So I throw a meeting on Kate's calendar. Roadmap discussion, very detailed, I know. And I wait for the meeting. I show up, I start excitedly spewing ideas left and right, and I am met with total blank stare. I don't know if Kate is disinterested or totally terrified of me, but I awkwardly end this meeting and leave a bit frustrated. But later that day, Kate sends me an email. And that email has five very well thought out, brilliant ideas that she brought to the table. I realized that this spontaneous brainstorm was in my communication comfort zone. Not so much for Kate. This was a turning point for me. To be a leader of highly effective teams, you need to invest in understanding their communication styles and share your own as well. So I got them together at a team meeting and I asked them to create their communication style tags. Now, we can't accommodate everybody's preferences 100% of the time, but the information is knowledge that gives us power to make better choices and to adapt if possible. Perhaps unsurprisingly, Kate is an introvert. She prefers asynchronous communication so that she can thoughtfully process her ideas. Kate's communication style tag is email for fastest response during the day. Prefers written comms to enable thoughtful, clear responses. Then there's my colleague, Mike. Mike would never respond to the messages I would send him on our internal messaging system. He would just ghost me. He wouldn't respond for days, hours, sometimes just not at all. So I catastrophized the situation and I said, what's wrong with me? Does Mike not like me? Does he think my questions are silly? Like, what is going on here? Turns out Mike's an extrovert. He has to turn off messenger during the day. Otherwise he would just chit chat with colleagues all day long. It wasn't me. Mike's communication style tag is text for Urgent matters adaptive to communication styles but prefers live interaction. Most extroverts do so. That's just two examples. By now I hope you're starting to think what is your communication style tag? Think about the two key ingredients and how they apply to you. How do you best communicate? Is it over email, live phone calls, text, etc. Do you do your best thinking in the morning like me? Or do you protect Fridays for focus time? How do you show up as your best self? Do you need time for thoughtful written responses like Kate? Or do you respond better to visual cues and prefer live interaction or videos? I'll give you a few more rapid fire examples. See what resonates. My colleague Kelly. She was ghosting meeting invites until I asked what was going on. She told me that an agenda list meeting gave her anxiety so she just didn't show up. Well, we fixed that. Kelly's Communication style tag is Checks email twice daily Agendas required an analyst Matt would balk at shorthand messages over Slack or teams or other shorthand communication tools. He lived in detailed spreadsheets and 1500 word emails. Matt's communication Style tag Email Deep Diver Full context only My friend Liz loves a voice memo. You send her a text message, she is sending you back a voice memo. Her Communication style tag is voice memo enthusiast. Send brief messages for quick updates. Avoid long texts and then a project manager. I worked with Louis. He would hold daily standups with his team but he refused late afternoon meetings. He needed that time to think. His communication style tag is morning meeting maven books. Everything before lunch. Afternoons are for thinking. So if you're a team leader, a manager, or just somebody tired of workplace friction, go first. Create your communication style tag. Normalize it with your teams and do it in a highly visible way so that people have this information on a day to day basis. Share it with your clients, your colleagues, your friends. The more people that adopt this change, the more effective it will be. Think about how it could apply to your personal life. My partner Charles turned to me a couple months ago on a Sunday evening and said, I got an email invite for us to go on a whitewater rafting trip. We have to RSVP tonight. Are you in? Well, I had about a million questions. Is this a glamping trip? Are there showers there? Who's actually going on this trip now? He should probably know me better by now. That's a whole other TED talk. But maybe this subtle reminder that I need advanced context to make fast decisions would be better for our relationship too. And this isn't just a nice idea. This information is data. Data helps you make better informed decisions, which drives better outcomes. And when we tell people how best to work with us, we not only increase communication effectiveness, we build trust. We move faster, we feel less strained, and we build teams that actually work. So what's your communication style tag? Thank you.

[Capital One Advertiser]

With no fees or minimums on checking accounts, it's no wonder the Capital One bank guy is so passionate about banking with Capital One. If he were here, he wouldn't just tell you about no fees or minimums. He'd also talk about how most Capital One cafes are open seven days a week to assist with your banking needs. Yep, even on weekends it's pretty much all he talks about in a good way. What's in your wallet? Terms apply. See capitalone.com bank capital1na member FDIC insurance isn't one size fits all. That's why drivers have enjoyed Progressive's name your price tool for years now. With the name your price tool, you tell them what you want to pay and they'll show you options that fit your budget. So whether you're picking out your first policy or or just looking for something that works better for you and your family, they make it easy to see your options. Visit progressive.com find a rate that works for you with the name your price tool Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates Price and Coverage match limited by state

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[Madupa Akinola]

That was Melissa m. Mekis@tedxbcg. Melissa reminds us that sometimes the most simple answers are the most effective. There's so much unnecessary guesswork and social error that goes into trying to back channel what we actually need and want. What if you just came out and told people plainly what works best for you? And what if you don't quite know the answer to how you like to communicate? Well, taking inspiration from some of Melissa's examples, I want you to ask yourself, what time of day do I like to have? Uninterrupted thinking time? What time of day do I prefer to have meetings? Do I prefer email or text message or talking over the phone? Do I like bouncing ideas off of a group in an open ended setting or having a fixed agenda. These are just some questions to get you started, but pay attention in the coming weeks to the modes of communication you prefer and don't be shy to share them with your co workers and your family and your friends. They might really appreciate the heads up and share with you some preferences of their own. That's it for today. TED Business is part of the TED Audio Collective. This episode was produced by Hannah Kingsley, ma, edited by Alejandra Salazar and fact checked by Julia Dickerson. Special thanks to Maria Ladias, Farrah de Grunge, Daniela Balaurazo, Tanzika Sangmanibong and Roxanne Hylash. I'm Madupa Akinola. Thanks for listening.

[Capital One Advertiser]

With no fees or minimums on checking accounts, it's no wonder the Capital One bank guy is so passionate about banking with Capital One. If he were here, he wouldn't just tell you about no fees or minimums. He'd also talk about how most Capital One cafes are open seven days a week to assist assist with your banking needs. Yep, even on weekends it's pretty much all he talks about in a good way. What's in your wallet? Terms apply. See capitalone.com bank capital1na member FDIC

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