#664: Hermaphroditic Butterfly

Summary

Tell 'Em Steve-Dave! #664: Hermaphroditic Butterfly

Release Date: February 1, 2026
Hosts: Walt Flanagan, Bryan Johnson, Brian Quinn (“Q”)
Special Guest: Johnny Law (Attorney)

Episode Overview

This episode is vintage Tell 'Em Steve-Dave! — raw, rambling, and irreverent. The central theme orbits around the crew’s ongoing misadventures: a deep dive on Walt’s new “VC Box” (a magic media device with questionable legality), tales of SeaWorld, an emotional story about a beloved cat, squabbles over junk in Airport Plaza, and the ever-fascinating mind of Get’em Steve Dave. The show also features a lengthy, playful exploration of legal and ethical boundaries around consuming pirated content, with “Johnny Law” joining to dispense legal wisdom. As always, the squad’s chemistry and humor make it an engaging listen.

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Key Discussions & Insights

1. Announcements, Plugs, and Socks (00:00–05:10)

• Patreon Poll for TESD Socks: Walt and Bryan urge Patreon backers to check their email for a sock sizing poll, with a stern warning about the consequences of not responding.
  • "You must enter it into the poll and, and when these socks are set to ship out and if you did not vote... you will instead be sent an alternate gift, most likely from something that shipped from a previous cycle." —Walt (00:40)
• Plug for “The Devil and Daisy Dirt” Stage Show: Walt and Bryan heap praise on this NJ folk horror theater piece, sharing anecdotes from their own experience (“our socks were knocked off...”).
  • "It combines spoken word music, like live music.... actresses, there's puppets... props." —Walt (02:08)
  • Both buy merchandise; Walt still fondly remembers the night, despite a $50 parking ticket.

2. SeaWorld, Kids, & Questionable Morality (05:12–26:14)

• Quinn’s SeaWorld Adventure:
  • Q reviews his SeaWorld trip, the high cost of parking ($40), and jokingly prompts his daughter to steal a Coke (she refuses: “She looks at me like, should we fucking shoot the person and leave?” —Q, 16:22).
  • A new “racist mime” is now at SeaWorld, after the original, beloved mime (Lynn) was fired after 36 years for a minor dispute:
    • “Mime's getting no respect anywhere. At least let him get it in the fucking park they work in for 36 years.” —Walt (18:48)
• Blackfish & Public Opinion:
  • Walt and Q lament that SeaWorld seems to have survived the “Blackfish” scandal, with guests now unfazed by the controversy.

3. Airport Plaza Scavenging & Office Politics (07:43–13:05)

• The Yarn Lady’s Sandwich Board:
  • Walt is grossed out by other tenants (including Bryan) circling to claim a sign immediately after a long-time resident’s departure:
    • "I think it's so gross... show some fucking level of respect." —Walt (09:21)
  • Bryan wants to use it as a TESD promo sign but admits it’d likely become more junk in their crowded office.
• Discussion of Renting the Yarn Lady’s Old Space:
  • Idle speculation about moving to her old space. No windows, probably not worth it.

4. Traveling, Flying, and First-Class Hacks (13:05–15:50)

• Quinn’s Airfare Adventures:
  • Travels on Breeze Airways, scores a $53 fare and wins an upgrade bid to first class ($40 instead of $60), making Walt and Bryan jealous.
    • “It does [feel like winning in Atlantic City], because I know I could have just paid the 60... I saved a couple of bones." —Q (14:03)

5. Lost Cats and Hard Goodbyes: The Tale of Princess Mitch (31:05–37:48)

• Princess Mitch’s Illness and Passing:
  • Bryan shares the devastating story of losing his beloved cat. He details giving insulin, the anxiety of having her in a cat-only boarding place, and ultimately losing her after she gets a final night at home:
    • “It’s the worst part about owning a fucking pet... They bring you so much joy, and then you know, you have to deal with the inevitable.” —Bryan (35:40)
  • Q, Walt, and Bryan commiserate about the pain of losing pets and the existential math of owning cats as they age.

6. Theme Parks: Universal’s Monster Land & Harry Potter Overload (27:25–30:32)

• Universal’s “Epic Universe”:
  • Q describes the new multi-park setup, listing “Harry Potter Land” (which now exists in three Orlando parks), Super Mario Land, How to Train Your Dragon Land, and the new Universal Monsters land.
    • “Maybe the monsters aren’t as popular as I thought… they can’t make more money off the monsters than Harry Potter.” —Walt (30:32)

7. The “VC Box”: Piracy, Legality, and Moral Quandaries (61:11–84:02)

• Walt’s Magical Media Box:
  • Walt is in (possibly illegal) ecstasy over his “VC Box” media player, which grants him access to seemingly all TV and movies for a one-time fee (even finds things still in theaters).
    • "When you open this box, it is like Pandora's literal box... There's nothing inside of it.” —Walt (62:09)
  • Quinn and Bryan question its ethics and legality, comparing it to old-school illegal cable boxes.
  • Walt considers becoming a local VC box distributor for $299/box. Q calls foul, seeing it as theft.
• Legal Breakdown with Johnny Law (68:13–84:08):
  • Johnny confirms: owning the hardware is legal, using it to access subscription/unlicensed content is not.
    • "As a user, it's very unlikely you would face actual criminal charges... More likely, civil penalties." —Johnny Law (70:38)
  • Major risk isn't legal action but malware: these boxes are often riddled with Chinese backdoors, posing serious cyber-security risks.
    • "For all we know, this is the Chinese government... trying to steal IP and stuff like that." —Johnny Law (78:09)
  • Walt is torn: “But, my God, to give it up now would be devastating... not the money so much as that. Like, the joy it brought me for these last seven days...” (78:24)
  • Advice: Don’t sell the boxes, probably don’t use it, don’t tell your wife it could “infect” the house system.

Memorable exchange:

• "I'm keeping it. I don't care what you guys say." —Walt (84:45)

8. The Get’em Steve-Dave “Gift of Gab” Game (91:02–127:12)

• Walt quizzes the group on which bizarre hospital stories Get’em actually related to his (attractive) nurses:
  • Options include: dietary restrictions at the China Buffet, pride in inventing a podcast game (“Get'emtration”), and giving away his black cane.
• The Real Answers:
  • 1. He did talk about “Get’emtration.”
  • 2. He shared the black-vs-green cane dilemma.
  • 3. He boasted about "pwning" a friend who thought he had diabetes.
• Funny aside:
  • Everyone marvels that any of these could truly happen, but especially that someone would chat about “Chinese spices” causing health issues due to China Buffet.

9. Tracking Tech, Paranoia, and Family (46:33–50:33)

• AirTags vs. Phones: Bryan discusses putting AirTags in his daughter’s backpack for location tracking, but learns they're less effective than simply using her phone.
  • "All I’m doing is tracking everybody in my life... it’s a stressing thing." —Walt (47:19)
• The crew discusses the weirdness and comfort of tracking family and friends for safety.

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• “I’d love to just sit there and throw chum at you as you walk through.” —Walt, making fun of animal rights protests at SeaWorld (24:38)
• “How can I not fucking have this?” —Walt, about his magical, questionably-legal VC Box (62:09)
• “Mime’s getting no respect anywhere. At least let him get it in the fucking park they work in for 36 years.” —Walt (18:48)
• “It’s the worst part about owning a fucking pet. It’s the only bad part...” —Bryan (35:40)
• “Is it going to hold up on some of them by his throat? There you go.” —Bryan, riffing about using legal Latin to avoid liability if he sells VC Boxes (67:02)
• “I'm keeping it. I don't care what you guys say, I'm keeping it.” —Walt (84:45)
• “Gift of Gab number one: did he talk to his nurses about the mystery of Get’em’s physical issues being mostly prevalent in Asians and the possible link to endless hours at the China Buffet?” —Walt (92:12)
• "But it's American Chinese food!" —Q, trying to make sense of Get’em’s medical "logic" (93:50)

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Timestamps of Major Segments

• 00:00–05:10: Announcements, Stage Show plug
• 05:10–07:43: SeaWorld, trip recaps, morality & mimes
• 07:43–13:05: The Yarn Lady’s sign, office politics
• 13:05–15:50: Breeze Airways, travel hacks
• 27:25–30:32: Universal’s new parks, Harry Potter
• 31:05–37:48: Princess Mitch’s passing
• 61:11–84:02: The VC (Piracy) Box saga (both setup and Johnny Law’s call)
• 91:02–127:12: "Get’em’s Gift of Gab" Game
• 46:33–50:33: Tracking family using tech

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Overall Tone & Takeaways

The chemistry is as crass and affectionate as ever—TESD excels at mixing sincere reflection with smart-ass banter. Whether Walt’s raving about a new bootleg box or Bryan’s grappling with mortality through the loss of a pet, the show oscillates between playful outrage, genuine pathos, and locker room-level giggles.

The "VC Box" discussion is the episode’s highlight, blending Walt's exuberance for forbidden tech, Q's ethical qualms, and Johnny Law’s bemused legal realism—while Get'em's feckless logic in the hospital game is just the kind of meta-comedy longtime listeners savor.

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Summary for the Uninitiated

Expect a ride through the mundane and the absurd: pop culture piracy, parenthood anxieties, the death of a beloved pet, SeaWorld nostalgia, squabbles over junk, playful moralizing, and a parade of inside jokes. The stakes are low, the laughs are high, and the uniquely TESD combination of heart and snark is in top form.

Transcript

[Walt Flanagan]

Hey, a couple of quick announcements before the show starts. If you are on the $20, $40, $60 and $100 tiers on the Patreon, please, please, please go fill out your size poll for the TESD socks that was sent to your email. If you can't find it in your email, check the junk folder. If you don't see it, please, please find out and you can go to the Patreon and, and find it there.

[Bryan Johnson]

The poll, yeah, called Socket to me. The post is called.

[Walt Flanagan]

Really? Yes. Oh, that was clever. Did you come up with that? No, I didn't because I was like, that's pretty good.

[Bryan Johnson]

That'd be stolen power, right? I don't want to be guilty of that.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's Tommy Lincoln, I think. And please note you must click on the poll and enter the size you want. Leaving a comment on what size you want will not work. You must enter it into the poll and, and when these socks are set to ship out and if you did not vote, you will not be asked for your size like I have in years past. You will instead be sent an alternate gift, most likely from something that shipped from a previous cycle. And finally, friend of the family Will Rogers has asked if we could announce that his buddy Alex Dawson and his stage show the Devil and Daisy Dirt will be showing at the New Brunswick Performing arts Center on February 20th, 21st and 22nd.

[Bryan Johnson]

That's going to be five shows over three days, Walt. A show on the 20th, two shows on the 21st and two shows on the 22nd. Now we saw this back in November when it was a sold out performance.

[Walt Flanagan]

This, this is true.

[Bryan Johnson]

We helped sold it out, you and I.

[Walt Flanagan]

We got tickets about a week before the show was to go on. And I Will told me about the show, he's like, yeah, I got a friend of mine, he does this stage show at the Jersey Devil and then he'd have to say no more. And once I said there's a, there's a devil in it. He goes, there's an eight foot tall puppet devil in it.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, I think puppet undersells it, but if they want to go with puppet, then puppet it is. But it is, it's amazing. It's, it goes. It.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, it's, it's one of those things. One of the most creative, unique pieces of art I've seen in quite some time. It combines spoken word music, like live music.

[Bryan Johnson]

There's a live performance guy on stage.

[Walt Flanagan]

Playing, singing, playing his ass off singing. There's actresses, there's puppets. Like I said, and there's props.

[Bryan Johnson]

I think calling a pup is like calling something. Jim Henson does a puppet, it undersells it.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's a Muppet.

[Bryan Johnson]

It's more than a Muppet.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. This thing is impressive.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah. So a little bit about special effects. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Here's a little bit of bio about The Daisy and Ms. Dirt. No, wait a minute. The Devil and daisy dirt. After 50 sold out performances and barns, breweries and music halls throughout the state, cult sensation the Devil and Daisy Dirt, a folk horror fairy tale about the Jersey Devil with live bluegrass and an eight foot tall puppet comes through the NB Pac for. For five shows in late February.

[Bryan Johnson]

That's the New Brunswick Performing Arts Center.

[Walt Flanagan]

And we paid for our tickets. Yes, I paid for you to. You were my plus one. And I was like, I really want to see the show. And Will offered me free tickets. But I did a little research on it, looked at the photos and everything that came with it. I was like, no, man, I'll pay you to see this. This looks fucking dope. And it was.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah. I mean, it's an immersive experience. There was fog through the. It was. Yeah, it was. I was blown away. I actually bought merch. That's how blown away I was by it.

[Walt Flanagan]

I brought a T shirt too. I brought a hoodie.

[Bryan Johnson]

I think I bought some pins. Yeah. And pins. And a patch. Can't go wrong with pins in a patch.

[Walt Flanagan]

Our socks were knocked off. Thank God we're doing TSD socks in a few months because both of our socks were knocked off. We haven't recovered them. We left them in East Brunswick. Yeah, I got a $50 ticket too, after went to that show because I didn't put enough money in the meter. Yeah. So this, that. And I still was. I left happy and still was a great experience, even though I got a $50 parking ticket in East Brunswick. So experience the timeless magic of what audiences are calling New Jersey ET and what Weird New Jersey magazine calls the most original Jersey centric and downright weird presentation in our state's theatrical history. Kevin Smith, Smodcastle Cinemas and Weird New Jersey present the Devil and Daisy Dirt a Garden State Gothic event at the.

[Bryan Johnson]

New Brunswick Performing Arts Center February 20th, 21st and 22nd. Get your tickets now.

[Walt Flanagan]

Visit nbpac.org for details. Dude, I'd love to just fucking sit there and throw chum at you as you walk through.

[Brian Quinn]

There's a racist mime at Sea World.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Go on. But these are dead ends. These are dead ends. Yeah, I'm pointing that right now. These are Pussy. Dead ends.

[Walt Flanagan]

Tell Em Steve Dave.

[Brian Quinn]

Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell Em Steve Dave.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Hello, Q. Hello, bud.

[Brian Quinn]

Hello, Wal. Hello and hello. Giddum.

[Bryan Johnson]

How you stankin'?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, I've been curious. It's one of my notes. How have you been feeling lately? Are you bouncing back? Are you recovering?

[Bryan Johnson]

I've been backsliding a little, but yeah, going to physical therapy.

[Walt Flanagan]

So what way you've been backsliding?

[Bryan Johnson]

Just like when I get up, like my legs are stiff again. Like I had a period where like I could just get. I could actually get up without like assistance. But now it's kind of. I need to push off and off, so.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Could just be age, buddy. I got to do that too.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, but like I said, like every.

[Brian Quinn]

Time I stand up. Yes, every time. Yeah, it's like your grandfather, your dad used to make that noise. Like that's every time I get out of the car.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, but like two weeks ago, like I was able to get up. I got a bed. Fine, but I'll just all by myself. No pushing off. But then like it like I just backslided a little. So next time I go to the doctor, I'm just gonna ring it up.

[Brian Quinn]

All right, well, that's how get him's doing backsliding a little.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah. But physical therapy is going well.

[Brian Quinn]

So we got the lowdown on his new coffee deal. Well, you weren't here, Q. You missed it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I missed a coffee deal?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, yeah, go on. He's not going to Wawa anymore. He's making his own coffee.

[Walt Flanagan]

Did it smell like coffee?

[Brian Quinn]

Not that simple though.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It did not smell like coffee when I came in.

[Walt Flanagan]

I noticed it immediately.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, you did.

[Walt Flanagan]

I was like, oh man, it smells like coffee. Because I like to smell of coffee. I don't like the taste of it. But I thought he had a coffee candle. But then I was informed, no, you're.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Not roasting your own beans.

[Walt Flanagan]

Brewing.

[Bryan Johnson]

No, no, no, no. My. The cost of health insurance has gone up, so it's the scanner.

[Walt Flanagan]

Scanner out in front of.

[Bryan Johnson]

I'll just close the door.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, it's just a. You were like, are you on the lam that you think that?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Don't say that again.

[Walt Flanagan]

The police scanner sent you into a tizzy.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, I was worried about sound of the. You know, the podcast we're doing more than anything.

[Brian Quinn]

All right, no more scanner. All right, what do I got this week?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Lots of what have you got?

[Brian Quinn]

People were interested in. Is there. Walt, do you have any more on the yarn lady? They were very Disappointed that we were like, yeah, the yarn lady left and that was it. I didn't know how much more we could talk about.

[Walt Flanagan]

I actually do have something I like to bounce off of.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

There we go.

[Walt Flanagan]

I want to see what your impressions are of the residents of Airport Plaza.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Who.

[Walt Flanagan]

Immediately upon a longtime tenant leaving, who happens to have a sandwich board type of sign out that she used to put out front.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Like a plastic. Like, it's like that two thing. You fold it out. Yeah, sure. It stands. It's called the sandwich board.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

I can't know the A frame signs. A frame size signs. So apparently there have been residents who are eyeing up her frame sign. A frame sign.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She just abandoned it.

[Walt Flanagan]

She abandoned it. And now there's the time period of when it's acceptable for someone to take that sign and then make it their own.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Where is it sitting?

[Walt Flanagan]

It's sitting in the hallway as you walk in.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I think the day after she moves out, you bring it in, you wait a week, see if anybody notices and pop it out.

[Walt Flanagan]

You don't think it's like, it's absolutely class, but it's not classless for a woman who spent 30 years here, like, within 24 hours. Like, the residents are like, trying to pick the bones of her carcass to take a sign.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She sold yarn. She wasn't a fucking doctor or fucking mayor or anything like that.

[Walt Flanagan]

I think it's so gross. Like, he is so nasty. I'm like, you're like, show some fucking level of respect.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, it means so little to her that she was like, ah, fuck it. Leave it in the hallway. I don't care.

[Walt Flanagan]

But he's so worried that somebody else is gonna take it. And he's like, I saw somebody else eyeing it up.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Well, what's he gonna put on the sign is more my question.

[Brian Quinn]

Exactly what are you gonna put?

[Bryan Johnson]

I was gonna get a TST thing made.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

And put it out there so we can put it, like, out front.

[Walt Flanagan]

We don't.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

We don't clean the mess in the fucking office before you tackle that project.

[Walt Flanagan]

Exactly.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Year and a half with this goddamn disaster area.

[Brian Quinn]

But think about it. Cleaning that shit up. Yeah. Or stealing a sign, which is easier.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And then the sign goes on the fucking pile. And now we got a sign in there.

[Brian Quinn]

New.

[Walt Flanagan]

Like, I guess the new piece of artwork that would go on the sign would never get made. And then it would become another thing that just sits there and never has any use for us.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Right. And that I agree with.

[Walt Flanagan]

Right. So I was like, I don't want it in here. First off, we don't want just people just wandering in anyway, though. Anybody who's coming here knows we're here anyway. We don't need a sign.

[Brian Quinn]

What are you guys doing here?

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, we've had a couple of those. Yeah, I just thought it was, like, very. It made me feel icky, though, that not only him, but apparently one of the Rons was also eyeing up the sign.

[Brian Quinn]

Circling the sign like a vulture.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I would let the Ron have it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, I would too. But I just also thought it was like, come on, man, she just left. Can you vulture, stop trying to fucking pick out her carcass?

[Brian Quinn]

How long has she been gone? She left the beginning of the year, right?

[Bryan Johnson]

A week?

[Brian Quinn]

January. A week?

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Okay.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She left it behind. She don't care.

[Walt Flanagan]

I know, but it's just, what if she does find.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's why she left it behind. She was like, I hope someone gets use out of this, Dad.

[Walt Flanagan]

I don't think so.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But she left it in the hall.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's where she always left it, though.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. So she's basically littering.

[Walt Flanagan]

She might come back for it. How embarrassing is that? If she's like, knock, knock, knock. Oh, excuse me. Do you happen to have my sign? And we got a. She, like, call the cops on her.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She don't belong here.

[Brian Quinn]

Have her trespass.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, I. I was. I was not keen on trying to, like, pilfer her. Her sign.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I thought you were gonna say, how do we feel about moving into her space? Well, I don't know what a space looks like.

[Walt Flanagan]

There's no window over there either. It would be just like.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It would be a move.

[Walt Flanagan]

Just. Yeah, just for the sake of moving it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Sure. Yes. I mean, I don't know.

[Walt Flanagan]

I think it's smaller, too.

[Bryan Johnson]

Possibly it's one giant room as opposed to, like, four smaller rooms.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, if it had a window, maybe.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. But none of the offices in Airport Plaza come with windows. For safety's sake.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Who needs egress or ventilation? Safety things can't get in if there's firing.

[Walt Flanagan]

You can't get out either.

[Bryan Johnson]

You'll notice no smoke detectors in here.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, yeah, sorry.

[Walt Flanagan]

If we're grandfathered in, we don't need smoke detectors.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Detectors, yeah. Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Eventually the day's gonna come. Like, do you smell that Next. You know, you're back in the old occupation trying to fight fires.

[Bryan Johnson]

This is legally defined as a closet. Can we go back into the City of Basil?

[Walt Flanagan]

If we come back, do we go back to Red Bank? Do you think they Let us have the, the little mini room back. If we were like, hey, we had a fire. And they're like, your second is a.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Kid involved into that episode.

[Walt Flanagan]

You would get pret though, as the fire guy. Fire follows you. If there's a fire here too.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, what if the condition of going back is you have to make a video?

[Brian Quinn]

I would do it. I was in Florida myself.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Q. Yeah. You went to down the SeaWorld. You went to SeaWorld. I was wondering if you're gonna pop down to Old Key west to meet me.

[Brian Quinn]

I would have liked to.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You could have.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's not a papa. That's a.

[Brian Quinn]

That's a haul. That's a flight.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, it's a 48 minute flight.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, I was gonna say that's a flight down.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I just, I flew from Key west to Atlanta, visit my parents. I mean, it was like, yeah, yeah, the old Breeze Airways. You ever hear Breeze?

[Brian Quinn]

No.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, it's pretty nice actually. $53 flight. I was like, this is dope.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, that's good. Fuck, I wish I'd known. I would have come down and Sage and Mary Beth.

[Bryan Johnson]

Is that first class or, or is it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

If you want to Upgrade to a first class, you can pay. You can either pay the $60 or you could do they call it the Breeze bid, where you. Where you could bid on it and whoever wins the bid gets the first class.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, really?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, up to $60. Because then you could just buy it, right? Yeah. So I put in a breeze bid of $40 and they, they put me up there.

[Brian Quinn]

Nice.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, you won.

[Brian Quinn]

Well played.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. Does it feel like winning at like AC or anything or.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It does, because I know I could have just paid the 60. So I was like. So I saved a couple of bones and I got to sit in the front row. Yeah, it was nice. Such a short flight though, that it's like by the time you're already on the way down. Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

58 planes.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, 58 planes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, it was. They were. Look, this isn't a Breeze Airways commercial, but yeah, they really impressed me with what they had.

[Brian Quinn]

Went to SeaWorld. It was.

[Walt Flanagan]

Did any listener come through?

[Brian Quinn]

Nobody came through. No. That's okay. Yeah, I didn't expect on such short notice anyway. It's like by the time the episode came out and I went to SeaWorld.

[Walt Flanagan]

What are the likelihood that there's an employee, that somebody works there, TSD at SeaWorld?

[Brian Quinn]

Well, unlikely. It seems possible. One, I'd say 40 bucks to park there. That's what really surprised me. That was like almost Half the ticket price.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That sucks.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, yeah. Like, I remember. I remember I thought I remembered it being 20. And even at that, I'm like, maybe we'll Uber over there. But then I'm like, ah, fuck it. It's probably going to be almost the same.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, you just got to suck it. I mean, what do you do? What are you doing?

[Walt Flanagan]

Can you take a trolley?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Save fucking no trolleys there.

[Brian Quinn]

You might be able to take a bus.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Not deal with the people on the bus. That's what you're doing.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's part of the experience for Sage.

[Brian Quinn]

Though, who wants to deal with trolley people.

[Walt Flanagan]

But then you're robbing Sage of the experience of taking the trolley too.

[Brian Quinn]

I am. I don't know what that means to her. She'd rather get there sooner or have the trolley experience.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's awesome because it stops everywhere. It takes like a 15 minute drive. Takes about an hour and a half on the trolley. Then the anticipation builds, though. Like, you can't. When you finally get there, you are fucking chomping at the bit.

[Brian Quinn]

I can't wait to get off the fuck off this trolley. Wherever I really want to go. Let's see, when we were there, what happened? I tried to get Sage to steal a Coke because I knew she wouldn't do it. This kid has morals that I didn't teach her. I don't know where she learned not to steal, but she got this coke and I was like, oh, that's a lot of money. Let's just take it. Let's just go out. Let's just leave. Like, just fucking around with her. She's like, no data, that's stealing. And I'm like, where'd you learn this? Like, I never taught you.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I taught you this.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Steal it from where, though?

[Brian Quinn]

Liberating. Like from one of the gift shops. Just a bottle of Coke from one of the gift shops. I was like, we should just take it, right? She looks at me like, I'm like, should we fucking shoot the person and leave? It's nuts.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, good. Learn a thing from her.

[Brian Quinn]

There was a racist mime at Sea World.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Go on, what is it? How'd you do racist? Was it blackface instead of whiteface?

[Brian Quinn]

No, it's a black guy in whiteface.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, that's the racist.

[Brian Quinn]

I count that as racist. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

I count that as racist because.

[Brian Quinn]

They always had the same mime there for like decades.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

And something happened with them. I'm not quite sure what the story was. Can you look it up? Get him.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

See what happened to Park Hours or something like that.

[Brian Quinn]

He might have done something up. And I remember it was like, he's gone.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

And then there was this new mime, and he was a black guy with white face.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Skinny.

[Brian Quinn]

Skinny guy.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, yeah, like a mime. Skinny.

[Walt Flanagan]

You don't see overweight mimes, do you?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's. No.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, I don't think so.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, I don't.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Maybe in the Joker's gang or something like that, but that's about it.

[Brian Quinn]

SeaWorld mime fired after altercation with security 36 years.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, 36 years and he was a heavier guy.

[Brian Quinn]

Lynn, the mime from SeaWorld, announced yesterday that after 36 years, he'll no longer be performing at SeaWorld. This is in 2024.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Holy shit.

[Brian Quinn]

His termin his employment was abruptly terminated after an altercation with SeaWorld security staff member. This dispute started when Lynn was riding his bike into work through the park to his dressing room. This is something he has done for years. This particular security guard, though, is not having it. And told Lynn he could not ride his bike through the park to his dressing room.

[Walt Flanagan]

It sounds like we got to get him on our hands. He's got a. He just has a badge and a. And a security vest. And he's like, nope, you're not going to ride through my parking lot.

[Brian Quinn]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

He's like, even though you've served 36 years for this park.

[Brian Quinn]

Right. You made me stop my karate moves. Yeah. Lynn explained during the exchange that he asked for clarification on why he suddenly could not ride his bike. And according to Lynn, he was not given a reason. And he also read the rule book, and there was nothing in there that states he could not ride his bike to the dressing room.

[Bryan Johnson]

I didn't make up my own rules.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, but you enforced them, though, like you were enforcing.

[Bryan Johnson]

I enforced the rules because they apply to everybody.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, but, you know, some rules, you know, have to be. You have to look the other way in certain circumstances. And a guy who served 36 years as your mom got to treat him.

[Brian Quinn]

A little bit more.

[Walt Flanagan]

You got to treat him a little bit more respect than that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Especially since he's.

[Walt Flanagan]

Mime's getting no respect anywhere. At least let him get it in the fucking park they work in for 36 years.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, that sucks.

[Walt Flanagan]

And think of that, though. He works at SeaWorld, there's not a person walking through those gates that gives a fuck about a mime. All they're there for is to see aquatic fish.

[Brian Quinn]

I don't know. People like, if you go to that Clyde and Seymour show people like that mime because he like fucks with the audience and stuff.

[Walt Flanagan]

Is there a seal on stage two with him? No, he's all by himself.

[Brian Quinn]

All by himself. He's out there, like directing the audience's attention.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, he does deserve more respect than he got from the security guard.

[Brian Quinn]

I think it's also because like nothing else is going on at the time. So you're just waiting there. He is all sad.

[Walt Flanagan]

How sad he is too. Yeah, he should be more sad that he was. He worked 36 years as a mime.

[Bryan Johnson]

I mean, I had to turn.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't know about that.

[Brian Quinn]

He's not even allowed back on SeaWorld property after one security guard reported him to HR. Look at him balancing that hat on.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's pretty good though, man. That's a talented mime.

[Brian Quinn]

He had over 82,000 TikTok followers. He said there wasn't a rule in SeaWorld handbook prohibiting him from riding his bike on the path.

[Bryan Johnson]

I mean, I turned Rob Briggle down at the Super Bowl.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, I've heard that story many times. Wow. What if it was one of the player? What if it was Peyton Manning? And he's like, I gotta get to the. I gotta get into the uniform. The game starts in five minutes, you gotta let me through.

[Bryan Johnson]

No pass, no entry.

[Walt Flanagan]

Your fucking walk of papers would be fucking served so fast by Roger Goodell. He'd slap you across the fucking face.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I fuckin hate guys like you. I hate guys like you. There's something called disappointment. Discretion, you piece of. You exercise discretion. You trash human. You power hungry. I hate guys like that. Like you. Give them a little bit of power.

[Brian Quinn]

That's what the security guard here sounds like. He's giving the m a hard time. And I think the mime was like, look, I have seniority over almost everybody here.

[Walt Flanagan]

Including probably the security guard.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Apparently not.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, he may have been a pain in the ass though. Maybe they wanted him gone.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, it could have been like, enough with this.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

36 years.

[Walt Flanagan]

36. Maybe he was looking a little long in the tooth. Maybe that makeup wasn't hiding all the wrinkles.

[Brian Quinn]

Something to say.

[Bryan Johnson]

Oh.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He was the mind boss. According to his shirt.

[Brian Quinn]

There he is.

[Walt Flanagan]

He's there with his seal, though.

[Brian Quinn]

With Clyde.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, but Clyde is the seal.

[Brian Quinn]

Klein to see more of the sea lions. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Wait a minute. So he does do an act with them?

[Brian Quinn]

No, no, no. This is just a picture he's posing for.

[Walt Flanagan]

How the fuck do you know those seals names then?

[Brian Quinn]

Clyde and Seymour? Because it's the Clyde and Seymour show.

[Walt Flanagan]

Did you see it?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Oh, of course. I love it.

[Walt Flanagan]

So they're calling the fucking mime this guy's old name. They're calling him Clyde now?

[Brian Quinn]

No, no. Clyde and Seymour are the seals.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh. The Clyde was the. Was the mime and Seymour was the seal.

[Brian Quinn]

I was just like, wow.

[Walt Flanagan]

They just replaced them, including his name, man. There's absolutely no respect.

[Brian Quinn]

Like you're now Lin m. Oh, yeah. So he got kicked out and replaced him with a new mime. Yeah. There you go. There's a picture with him.

[Walt Flanagan]

You should take a mime class. Get him, you know, maybe earn a little extra buck.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He's a fat mime. I guess. He's a funny one. He's like the buffoonish one.

[Brian Quinn]

Fry's daughter set up a gofundme. Could you go just a little bit higher for her father looking to help him to start up his own roadshow company.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This was 2024.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, this wasn't that long ago.

[Bryan Johnson]

This seems like family friendly juggalos.

[Brian Quinn]

I never saw the two mime show. That's surprising.

[Bryan Johnson]

Gotta pay extra for that.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, I guess so.

[Walt Flanagan]

Two mimes and a cup.

[Brian Quinn]

Got it. What else happened? What else happened?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Well, I saw. I saw Jimmy Buffett's Coral Reefer Band play. It's pretty awesome.

[Walt Flanagan]

Is that like fuzz guitars and.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, it was. It was just his backing band and the guys that wrote the song with them. There was like 10 of them on stage and they. They sang. They. I mean, it was almost 4,000 people there. They sold out the amphitheater and tickets were started at $100. They went up to like 1200.

[Walt Flanagan]

Jimmy's not even there.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Jimmy's not even there.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, the backup band and the backup singers are performing.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

All the same people that performed over the years. The Coral Reefers are. And holy. It was like middle aged white guy heaven. It was just sea of people.

[Brian Quinn]

Everybody have their Hawaiian shirts on.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Parrot heads. Parrot heads, yeah. Not dancing in sync, but like, I looked over, me and Jiggy were there and we're looking around and I was like, look at how. Look at how everybody's having the best time.

[Walt Flanagan]

Does Jimmy like we're all a bunch of drunks?

[Brian Quinn]

Parrot heads.

[Walt Flanagan]

You think? Do you think when Jimmy sees this, when he sees the ticket sales and he's like, they sold out without me.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't think Jimmy.

[Walt Flanagan]

I like. I know he likes to be like Margaritaville island, but I bet you even. I guarantee he's a human being. He's still dead. Oh, is he Dead.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

S reason they did it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, okay. I thought he was like, I'm not doing it anymore. And they're like, well, we want to make money, Jimmy. So we're going on tour without you?

[Brian Quinn]

No, we got a new Jimmy. He's a black guy.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, it's more like a tribute show than.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay, all right. That makes more sense.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But it was. It was. I mean, people were having a blast, dude.

[Walt Flanagan]

And I was Cheeseburger in Paradise.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, you know it.

[Bryan Johnson]

I got an ad earlier today for a Space Freely show. It's a loving tribute to Ace Freely. I was wondering if you were interested.

[Walt Flanagan]

I wouldn't mind seeing Space Freely.

[Bryan Johnson]

I'll send it to Rob.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, man. When we were at one of the shows, it was the ORCA show, Shamu show. Every once in, like, they would clap for. You know, they're like. And we're, you know. And today we're welcoming, you know, our military. And, you know, everybody clapped and I started going like, thank you. Thank you. Sage got so pissed. He goes, they're not clapping for you. Like, really? Like, annoyed Valor. Really annoyed at me that I was like, thank you. Thank you, everybody.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She's a blast.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, she's fun. Yeah, she's really fun.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What's that? I thought Shamu was Persona non grata there.

[Brian Quinn]

I guess not. They still got two Shamus there. One Shamu and one whatever their name is.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

How's the living conditions? I mean, they gotta be like, they can't risk a second of bad press.

[Brian Quinn]

They have to be living in paradise. Those whales.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Cheeseburgers in Paradise. And apparently Shmoo. What's his name?

[Brian Quinn]

Not in Paradise.

[Walt Flanagan]

So do you think the park has returned to its heydays of attendance wise, you know, in 2026? Or do you think they're still struggling to get people to go through the turnstiles with all the bad press?

[Brian Quinn]

I bet you people are like, what? Blackfish? What the hell is that?

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, that's terrible. People are like, a day out that's more important than.

[Brian Quinn]

Yep.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's too bad, because that was a movement I actually agreed with. I was like, yeah, I can get behind this one.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. I remember I was doing a show with Kevin down in Florida, and Kevin was like, so you went to SeaWorld, huh? And this was like, on the heels of Blackfish.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

And they're like, oh, you're a piece of shit. You know, like, everybody's booing me and shit. I was like, fuck you. How many of you drove here today in SUVs that are chewing up the fucking ozone layer like you, dude.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'd love to just sit there and throw chum at you as you walk through.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Style.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's like, go ahead, enjoy this, you.

[Brian Quinn]

Piece of all in my mouth.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Leave a bag of clams.

[Brian Quinn]

They just chummed me.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Drop it on you.

[Brian Quinn]

Take this, chumley. Chum me, man. They chum me over in SeaWorld. I smell like fish.

[Bryan Johnson]

The blood of Keiko is upon you.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You're the fucking fish. Fascist, man.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Did you do anything else there in.

[Brian Quinn]

Orlando the next day? No, we were only there for two days. Like, we had one travel day on one end and one travel day on the other end. So we were only there for Tuesday and Wednesday.

[Walt Flanagan]

How come you only stayed for such a short period of time?

[Brian Quinn]

I just want, like, if I stay like three or four days, it just seems too long. So I was like, we're gonna get in there.

[Walt Flanagan]

You had one day to do things and then one day to go home.

[Brian Quinn]

One day at Sea World. The next day, Sage just wanted to swim. So we went to the pool and she swam around and stuff. And thankfully it was like one of the. Like the day that we got really lucky. The day that we went to SeaWorld and the day we went to the pool, we're both like 72 degree days.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. And then the day we left, it was 58. The day we arrived, it was 58. And they're like, yeah, we're about to go through a cold snap, which I guess means is going to get even colder than it was.

[Walt Flanagan]

So to have an interest in going to see the Universal Monster exhibit that's at Universal Studios.

[Brian Quinn]

I did. But like to pay that much for shit that, like, I'm like, I'm not going to go on the rides. Like, I'm not gonna go on these roller coasters or anything.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, I don't think they're roller coasters.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Frankenstein is the Frankenstein's not really. It's one of those where you sit in the chair and, yeah. You hang from it.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And you go through faces, but it doesn't do loops or anything like that. At worst, it makes you look up at the ceiling and down. It was fine.

[Bryan Johnson]

You did it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I went on three times. I told you all about this.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, I thought that. Okay.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, I got the tour, remember?

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, it was. I can't wait to go.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's great.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

You're going this summer, right?

[Walt Flanagan]

I hope to. I'm not certain, but I'd like to go this summer to cross that off My bucket list to see the Universal monsters, you know, put back into prominence, you know, where they rightfully belong. In that studio. They should be owning that studio.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, I agree. You just gotta be careful because, like the, you know, it's five lands. Like, it's five.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, I know. There's Harry Scooter or whatever his name is.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, Harry Scooter and. And Potter. Su Mario. Su Mario.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, that's. That's new then. I've never seen that. I'm not interested in that either.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

All of these are new. Every park is new. It's a separate location. It's not. You're not going to the Universal Studios you went to. It's like 10 miles down the road.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, so there's so multiple tickets on, right?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, no, no. Well, all those lands that are with monsters are all one ticket.

[Walt Flanagan]

We. The last time I was at Universal Studios, I was with get them only a couple of years ago. Where. How come we didn't see any of this stuff?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They were building it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, okay. It's all new.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

All new. Completely new.

[Walt Flanagan]

So what happened to the Marvel world?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's still at Universal. That's still at the main. Universal.

[Walt Flanagan]

Still operating there. It's great.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, they updated the Spider man, right? It's like. It's pretty cool. The graphics are.

[Walt Flanagan]

So what is the other. So there's Universal monsters.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So you walk into. It's called Epic Universe. Epic Universe is the name of the park. You walk in and there's Super Mario Land. Harry Potter Land. How to train your dragon Land.

[Walt Flanagan]

What's that from?

[Brian Quinn]

How to train dragon.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's a movie.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Harry Potter is cool because it's not like the one. It's based on the. It's based on the fantastic beasts. So they set it in Paris in the twenties. And the land is. You walk in. I do. It is like walking into Paris. It's insane.

[Walt Flanagan]

So wait a minute. So this has been there for a while though, right? Harry Potter?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Well, no, they just.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, there. Was there Harry Potter there before. Well, they're dragging that breeze.

[Brian Quinn]

Fire.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's in the other part.

[Brian Quinn]

Okay.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, that's.

[Walt Flanagan]

That look cool too.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's at the diagonal. Something alley. It was cool. It's great. It's all great.

[Walt Flanagan]

Harry Potter is that popular that it warrants two fucking two parks?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

There's three. There's three in Orlando alone because you have two in Universal. There's two different Universal parks there.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And there's a Harry Potter in each of those. And now they have the Epic Universe where they put in another Harry Potter one.

[Walt Flanagan]

That shit hasn't died down yet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I think it's.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's just more popular than ever.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They're making a new. Hbo is making a new Harry Potter show and stuff like that. Okay.

[Brian Quinn]

Wow.

[Walt Flanagan]

Maybe the monsters aren't as popular as I thought they were.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I assure you, they're not as popular as Harry Potter.

[Walt Flanagan]

They can't make more money off the monsters than Harry Potter.

[Brian Quinn]

Remember this guy?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I wish they could.

[Brian Quinn]

So. So we came home Thursday night. We stopped at Texas Roadhouse for dinner.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's always a nice spot.

[Brian Quinn]

Not always. No, dude.

[Walt Flanagan]

Orlando.

[Brian Quinn]

Well, first.

[Walt Flanagan]

Texas.

[Brian Quinn]

No, this was in Jersey.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, Jersey.

[Brian Quinn]

Over in Holmdel.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay.

[Brian Quinn]

Well, first we had. I found out, like, before we even left, I found out that Princess Mitch had diabetes, so I had to start giving her insulin shots twice a day. And, you know, she's one of these cats that skittish around people she doesn't know, so I can't, like, have somebody watch her or whatever. So we boarded her at this cat place over in. Over in Lincroft. And they only do cats. There's no, like, bark. And it was really. It was really a nice place to. To set your cat. They had, like, these separate cages that were big with cat trees that they could mess around in and all this. So we go to Roadhouse, Texas Roadhouse on the way home. And I know I have a history of having problems with waiters and waitresses, but you like, yeah, me, if you could believe it. But we sit down, and it's 15 minutes before anybody even comes to the table, which is like, an excessive amount of time. So I'm annoyed, but I'm still like, all right, I'm not gonna.

[Walt Flanagan]

You're just back from vacation. You're not on fucking vacation time.

[Brian Quinn]

It's kind of on a high, kind of on a high. But this is. But 15 minutes is taking me a little bit. So the guy comes by, he's like, we order everything at once because now we're ready. I'm not exaggerating. Another 15 minutes goes by. Nothing. No drinks, no food. Mary Beth is like, oh, the vet's call, and I gotta go take this call. So she comes in and she's like. When we. She comes. She goes outside. She comes back in. She's like, she took the call. We have to pick up Princess Mitch tonight. She's not doing that great. Which I did not want to hear, especially on the heels of this fucking dickhead ruining our dinner. So I'm just like, fuck it, we're leaving. And I didn't make a big stink about it. We just left. I didn't talk to, like, I didn't talk to any managers, any shit like that. I was just like, fuck it, let's go. So we go get Princess Mitch and she is not looking good. And they did X rays and she had the same. She was like getting fluid in her lungs and she had the same shit that, like that. That she had when I used to get her. I had to do all those operations for. It's like this weird, like, sinewy stuff that, like, was growing in her. So we're like, all right, it. We'll bring her home. We'll let her spend the night at the. At home. And because it's like 9 o' clock at this point, let her spend the night at home. We'll bring her to the vet the next day. And there was no next day for her.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, no, dude.

[Brian Quinn]

I was like, no, not Princess Mitch.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, how old was Princess Mitch?

[Brian Quinn]

She was 11. So it's like she got on one hand, you know. Mary Beth was trying to console me. She got a lot of years out of.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Me paying for her to go to the vet and get all those operations.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

But like, she was like. There was a moment like, within the past two months where I'm like, should I hold back on feeding this cat? She is so fat now. She got really heavy, you know, and then suddenly she just started going down, down, like, losing weight. So we brought her to the vet. She's got the diabetes. So we're going to. We're going to give her insulin. And I'm thinking in my mind, I'm like, so what? Cats live to like, 15, 16. So the next fucking. In five, six years, I'm going to be given this cut. Insulin. I was like, I guess that's. I guess that's what it is.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I give Chessy fluids twice a week, Right?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. And then you know, after, you know, after I heard the, the bad news about her, you know, at the vet, I'm like, she's probably not going to make it. I'm like, I would give anything to give her insulin for the next six years. She was such a sweet cat. And I know everybody says that. Like, I don't say that about Salem.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Right.

[Brian Quinn]

Because he'll scratch you out of nowhere.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

You can be petting him and suddenly he's like, you know, get you little cat. Forget her.

[Walt Flanagan]

She.

[Brian Quinn]

She's like on another planet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She's a maniac.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. She's crazy. But Princess Mitch Was a really sweet cat with her little black nose. And now I'm starting to get choked up thinking about her. Yeah. Really fucking sucked.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So were you with her? Like, did you spend the night with her?

[Brian Quinn]

Were you spent the night with her? Yeah, she was on the bed, and she. She didn't die in the bed, thankfully, but she was, like, on the bed, and we were petting her, and she was purring, and we put her on the heating pad for a little while, because she loves the heating pad. And then suddenly she jumped down and she crawled under the bed, because sometimes that's where she goes to sleep. And then the next morning, she was just. She was gone. And I wasn't, like, totally shocked, but it's heartbreaking. Yeah. I was like, God damn it. Because I was also thinking, I'm like, all right, she has that in her lungs or whatever. I'm like, but they do the same thing they did last time. But I'm like, she's also eight years older now, and the way she looked, I'm like, there's no way she can handle it. There's no way she could handle the same kind of, you know, handling that or care that she was getting back then. Yeah. It's like she was, like, maybe three or four at that point. Maybe not even that old.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Dude, I'm real sorry to hear. It's horrible.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. It's like, it's the worst part about owning a fucking pet. It's like, a lot of times it's the only bad part about owning a pet. It's like, they bring you so much joy.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

And then, you know, you have to deal with the inevitable.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I know, but you know what, dude? Honestly, like, she held on one night. She could have died in that cage without, you know, like, that's. That's a gift.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. That's what Mary Beth said. She was like, you could have, like, gotten back on top of the waiter being a shithead.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Like, she would have died alone. Like, I separated from you guys, wondering what's going on.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Like, her last memory, if cats have memories, her last memory is us being like, see you later. Dropping her off. Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So you got. Kind of got a gift in a.

[Brian Quinn]

Little bit of water. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

I was thinking the only way you can avoid that, like, that kind of. You know, the worst part of owning a pet is to the next pet you get is, like, a tortoise.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Who outlives me. Yeah. Yeah. Well, dude, that's why I'm like. You know, I said to Mary Beth, I was like, what would you do if I came back with a kitten? You know? Like, she'd be like, well, I wouldn't be really mad, but, you know, I would be like, I'm not ready for another cat just yet. Then I started thinking. I'm like, you know, if this cat lives another 11 years, like, I don't know.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I do this math all the time. I'm like, how many more cycles of cats do I have left? I'm like, it might only be one.

[Brian Quinn]

Yes, I hear you, man. That's what I was thinking. I was like, maybe I shouldn't get a kitten. Like, get an elder cat, you know?

[Bryan Johnson]

But then you see those ones that go to, like, 20 years. 20 plus years.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Benjamin Cat was old.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, they're getting up. I mean, Chessy's 16 now, you know?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Wow.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They're all getting up there.

[Bryan Johnson]

How's Boris doing?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He's great. He's a best. He's awesome. But he's two and a half. I mean, he's coming. He's a maniac still.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. They're fun when they're maniacs, right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I call them a Torosaurus.

[Brian Quinn]

Like, you don't know what they're gonna do next. It's like, one minute that you're petting them, the next minute, they're tearing down the hallway and attacking something.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, he's getting better. Playing catch, too. Like. Like, now it's just like, I have to stop because I'm like, all right. I'm like, I don't want to do this right now.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, sorry.

[Brian Quinn]

TSA agent gave me a bunch of. I was like, like, 99 times out of 100, if I'm flying. Like, I. Like, if I go through the TSA pre check.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Because I have it. So this time, when we go through Zorlando, right? There's Orlando. Yeah. We go through Orlando. And I have the TSA Precheck, but Sage doesn't have it. So I just go through the regular check with her. And when I said, when I got to the. The where you put in your luggage and everything, I said, do I have to take my coat and shoes off? I said, I have TSA pre check. And he's like, this isn't TSA Precheck.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh.

[Brian Quinn]

I was like, okay, you're that guy. You're fucking giddle. I think we have. Yep. And I said. I was like, yeah, I know. I know.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They usually give you the blue laminated card to handle process. Right.

[Brian Quinn]

I said, but most times, people will just.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

You know, Allow for it. And he's like, yeah, but this isn't TSA pre check. And I was like, I don't want to be one of these people on video list. So I'm like, all right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Usually that they're good.

[Brian Quinn]

I'll take my fucking coat off. Or my jacket, my sweat jacket, or whatever the fuck I was wearing, you know? But it's like, yeah, it's that kind of guy that's like, everybody else gives you the little blue slip, but not him.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's why the little blue slips exist. That's why they exist.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's so stupid.

[Brian Quinn]

But he's like. When he's doing it, he's like one of these guys. He's not looking at me when he says it because he's a little pussy boy.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah. I at least made eye contact.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. I'm sure I get a staring wriggler right in the eyes.

[Bryan Johnson]

No, sir.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Get a boner. Growing boner.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Tells people they can't do something. Wow. Usually the people are. Orlando Airport are. Is. I always strike them as surprisingly, like, always.

[Brian Quinn]

All right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

I find that most times, like, even Newark, like, I never have a problem in New York.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't know why people complain about.

[Brian Quinn]

People hate new work. And I'm just like. Every time I go, I sail right through. I don't.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't know what it is I take. I fly, like, minimum twice a month. I always use Newark. And it's always easy.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There was that one little stretch of like, a week where it got a bad rep because they're like.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Like, they would show the lives shut down. The.

[Walt Flanagan]

The.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

The one of the runways was getting resurfaced, and nobody wanted. I don't know why they didn't just say that, but they didn't say that. And, like, people were like, this place sucks.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, they also had the. They moved the air traffic controllers down to Philadelphia. So they were having communication problems between the airport and where the air traffic controllers are. Yeah. So that's why they had to, like, start cutting the flights down 10%. Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Always worked good for me, but I usually go to, like, Orlando or LA or New York, Key west or something like that. There's really, like, hubs that they have to have their tight.

[Brian Quinn]

You know.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but whatever, man.

[Brian Quinn]

All right, well, let's talk about Ridge.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Who?

[Brian Quinn]

Ridge?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Ridge?

[Brian Quinn]

Yes. Yes. I can't show off the products on video. I'm sorry for that, Ridge. But I can make a personal endorsement, have the Ridge wallet right in my Pocket right now. I love it.

[Bryan Johnson]

You're lucky.

[Brian Quinn]

A lot of people are like, hey, you're lucky. You are. Let's see. Upgrade your wallet today. Get 10% off at ridge with code tesd.com tesd ridgepod. All right. This is all stuff I'm supposed to be putting in the description, I think. So here we go. Tell a story about the wallet I had before Ridge. Oh, my God. You don't want to know. The story is so long, Walt, about my former wallet that we don't even have time to tell it today.

[Bryan Johnson]

Can I buy that story off you?

[Brian Quinn]

Did my back hurt because I was wallet.

[Walt Flanagan]

Why do they want to hear about another wallet? I would have to think it was a horror show.

[Brian Quinn]

They want to hear about a shitty wallet that you had. Like a big. Like your dad's big leather wallet that he used to sit on and he would be crooked and shit.

[Bryan Johnson]

Or this thing.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, like Adam's wallet. Who needs one of them?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

George Costanza.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Is that all money?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Look at this. Now.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

How much money you got?

[Brian Quinn]

Look at this Ridge.

[Bryan Johnson]

They're star bills.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They're what?

[Bryan Johnson]

Star bills.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What does that mean?

[Bryan Johnson]

They have a little star in the right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But what does that mean?

[Bryan Johnson]

I just save them because they have.

[Brian Quinn]

A star on them.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but why do they have a star?

[Brian Quinn]

Are they worth more?

[Bryan Johnson]

Oh, they have a star on them because that. That run of money was deemed unfit for some reason, so they destroyed it and reissued it. But when they reissue it, they put a star at the end of the serial number. So whenever I get them, I just save them.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But you don't save them. You carry around with them every living day of your life. Yeah, so I don't spend saving. What's going on there?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, it's. It's. I don't want to spend it because they're star bills.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I've had enough.

[Walt Flanagan]

And I would leave them home, then not take them everywhere you're at in case you have an emergency, and you're like, oh, my God, I need my star bill. I gotta use a star bill to buy whatever or.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, it's with my credit card, so.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

I thought you couldn't have a credit card. You were trying to.

[Bryan Johnson]

Debit card.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

The fold of the star bills alone is bigger than any wallet I've ever had.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, you've got a lot of star bills.

[Bryan Johnson]

It's definitely bigger than a Ridge wallet. Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Wow.

[Brian Quinn]

Could you fit that in a Ridge wallet? I wonder. I think you might be able to.

[Bryan Johnson]

I'd love to try to find out.

[Brian Quinn]

I got it. You know what? I have a ridge wallet at home. Next week, I'll bring it in, we'll try it out.

[Bryan Johnson]

Okay.

[Brian Quinn]

All right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What makes you.

[Brian Quinn]

I got two.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Well, what makes them do that?

[Walt Flanagan]

Do what? The star.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Like that. That looks to me like 100, 100 bills.

[Walt Flanagan]

Autism.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. Yeah. But what is it? What is inside him? Like, what's the thought process?

[Walt Flanagan]

It's. It's all about keeping something that he deems rare and he has it. And if it ever comes up, he can show somebody.

[Brian Quinn]

I'm like, star bills are gay. And he's like, oh, no, they're not. Check out how many I have.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

One star bill will do that.

[Walt Flanagan]

One would suffice. Yeah, but this is a man.

[Brian Quinn]

If you ever go.

[Walt Flanagan]

When you're leaving today and you're getting in your car to drive home, go look. Go look in his Jeep.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, I've seen it. Looks like our office.

[Walt Flanagan]

And then you ask yourself, I'm really worried about his wallet. The state of his wallet. I really think he's got much more bigger issues than the wallet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But you don't see them as issues, though.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, no, you wouldn't. Not if you're, you know, you can't identify that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But these are pussy dead ends. These are dead ends. Yeah, I'm pointing that right now. These are pussy dead ends. These are. These are in the maze quest, the eternal quest.

[Brian Quinn]

First he pulls out the wallet, then he pulls out a star build to impress the girl, and she's like, see ya.

[Walt Flanagan]

This is really good. I got a new game today. It's exactly. It's perfect. It's called the Gidem's gift of Gab.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

And this comes into. It comes into place so beautifully into, like the mind of a git of Steve G. And how you guys see things so differently than me and him.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. All right.

[Brian Quinn]

Wow.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This is me and him.

[Brian Quinn]

We're the ignorant one side. I have a feeling. I have a feeling we're the dumb ones.

[Walt Flanagan]

You can't understand. You can't even hope to fucking try to digest what's in that fucking noggin.

[Brian Quinn]

I'm not going to attempt it. I mean, I'll play the game, but I know I'm going to lose.

[Bryan Johnson]

All right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Ridge wallets.

[Brian Quinn]

Ridge wallets. Yeah, I think that could be why get him needed his vertebrae replaced. He was sitting on that fucking wallet for so many years. Unique, slim, modern design that holds up to 12 cards plus cash. Made with premium materials like aluminum, titanium, and carbon fiber. Over 50 colors. And styles to choose from. And all Ridge products have a lifetime warranty. This is literally the last wallet you'll ever have to buy. And it gives you peace of mind knowing that all Ridge wallets will have RFID blocking technology, keeping you safe from digital pickpocketers. Losing your wallet is the worst, but with the Ridge airtag attachment, you'll always know exactly where it is before panic mode kicks in. Ridge isn't just about wallets. They create premium everyday essentials like key cases, suitcases, and rings, all built with the same sleek and durable design. And no matter what Ridge you pick, they have a free shipping, 99 day risk free trial and a lifetime warranty on all their products. So for a limited time, listeners get 10% off at Ridge by using code TESD at checkout. Just head to codridge.com and use code TE-D and you're all set. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support the show and tell them that. Tell them Steve Dave sent you. All right. Is it enough time to talk shit about Ridge? It's not really about Ridge, but it's like they say they have, like, the AirTag attachment one. I bought some airtags because I'm like, I'm gonna put one in Sage's backpack because she gets home at all different times. So if I have one in her backpack, I'll know when she's gonna get home so I can go out there and meet her.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Great.

[Walt Flanagan]

She doesn't have a phone.

[Brian Quinn]

She has a phone, but she doesn't use it. I don't know.

[Walt Flanagan]

Can't you use that to track her?

[Brian Quinn]

I guess I probably could. Yeah. Yeah. She's sitting on her bedside table for the past year. Oh, okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

So she is. Oh, she would have to carry her.

[Brian Quinn]

Well, I could put it in her bag. Yeah, I could put her back. That's not a bed.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, but then you got to charge it all the time.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, but the air tag.

[Bryan Johnson]

No.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, but the air tag. I'm like, I put it in her bag and I'm like, I'm going to know exactly where she is. Not the case. You can only do it if somebody is on, like, the network and their Bluetooth is working the same as your blue. Like, I looked it up and I was like, okay, so this isn't anything. It's not gps. It's not anything.

[Walt Flanagan]

I thought, oh, then the phone would be far more. Yeah, the phone's a desirable device to use than the airtag.

[Brian Quinn]

Yes, exactly. Exactly. I didn't Think of the phone, to tell you the truth, because I forget she has one. That's a good idea.

[Walt Flanagan]

All I'm doing is tracking everybody in my life. It's a disease. It really is. It's a stressing thing.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Wow.

[Walt Flanagan]

I wish. I, like, at times, I'm like. I say to myself, I'm not gonna look and see what's going on because I don't want to worry or anything, because if it's later at night, then.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

You know? But yeah, it's one of the. It's like the best and worst thing.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. My friend's daughter. My friend's daughter's going to college in. In Vegas, and she looks at it. She's like, she's in a tattoo shop on Las Vegas. Just shut it down.

[Walt Flanagan]

It doesn't mean she was in there, though. It could be like that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She was. It turns out she was in there. Oh, she's 18.

[Walt Flanagan]

What are you gonna do? Nothing you can do, man. Yeah, but that's that helpless feeling, though. But there are so many times, though, that I. I. I cannot stop myself from just checking. And then inevitably, I'm like, I. I wake my wife up, and I'm like, call her. See what's going on.

[Brian Quinn]

Why don't you call? Because they'll be like.

[Walt Flanagan]

Because then it's like that awkwardness of, like. Like, you know, I want, like. I want my wife to do it. Yeah, yeah. It just works out better.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And Deb's on board. She's like, all right, let me call.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, then she's like. At first, she's not. She's like, why are you waking me up? And then eventually, I'll just. I'll be like, I'll wake her up enough to have her do it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It. Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. There was one time that. That she said that. They were like. The one time I freaked out completely is that. Said that she was in a hospital, the phone was in a hospital. And I was like, what the. So I wake my wife up, and we're calling, no answer. We're calling, no answer. And then finally she answers, and she's like, I was never in a hospital. So that's why I said it doesn't mean.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, it's like the Jones beach thing all over again.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. I was never in a hospital. She was. I don't know why it said that, but it, like, it. It absolutely showed that she was in hospital. She could have been somewhere next to the hospital, though. But I just. When I. When I zoom in, it's at hospital.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Shit, man.

[Brian Quinn]

It's interesting at their ages, they're not like, you're not fucking tracking me? Like, I don't want to be tracked at my age.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, they track us.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. They're like, they know what we're doing. Like, why are you here? What are you doing over there? You know, they don't do it in a way that, like, that we're worried. They're just like, why are you over in Ocean County? Why are you eating at a Roy Rogers in Ocean County?

[Bryan Johnson]

I was gonna say it's either Texas Roadhouse here, the post office, or home.

[Walt Flanagan]

My wife is like, because dad had.

[Brian Quinn]

To have mashed potatoes.

[Walt Flanagan]

We drove an hour and a half to a Roy Rogers.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I have one of my friends who I don't. I don't want to. I don't want to say who because I don't want to. I don't want to ruin it, but accidentally shared their location with me. And so every once in a while, like not looking at what they're doing, but I'll look at the map and I'll see where there are. You know, it's just funny to know where your friends are.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. I mean, at time I didn't. I wondered if you guys were up for all of us sharing our location so we just know where everybody is at all times. Just as a safety feature.

[Bryan Johnson]

I'll do it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't want get up going where I am.

[Walt Flanagan]

I don't think you could do it with your phones. With either any of your phones. I don't think would work.

[Bryan Johnson]

I have Google, I have an iPhone.

[Walt Flanagan]

So there's really only two places you could be. Either Debbie's or here. And maybe in April when you go away. But otherwise that is it though.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah. How about my father's?

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, that's true.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. If he tracked me, it's the same like you. If you were to look track me, you'd be like, he might have died. He's been in the house. He's in the house so long, we.

[Walt Flanagan]

Need a welfare check. Guy hasn't moved in two weeks.

[Brian Quinn]

He's an elderly man. I'm concerned for him. Yeah, so that's if a ridge. Let's see, what else do I got here? We're going to be calling Johnny Law pretty soon.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. There was a. Some advice I needed from a lawyer regarding something that has come up and I wanted to get Johnny's thoughts on it. Yeah, it's probably got food in it or something.

[Bryan Johnson]

No, that was. That was a gift from Danny the lawyer.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But what's inside it?

[Bryan Johnson]

I think the same thing that was in your bags.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yes. Thank you, Danny. Lawyer from episode 600. Why is it some wonderful gifts?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Why is it in the middle of the floor?

[Walt Flanagan]

You'd have to ask.

[Bryan Johnson]

It wasn't. I think he dragged it over there.

[Walt Flanagan]

Dragged it from where, though?

[Bryan Johnson]

The couch.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, he got up on the couch.

[Bryan Johnson]

I think he pulled it off the couch. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, I don't. I'm surprised that he could do that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He might not have.

[Bryan Johnson]

This is coming.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Get him right where it lands.

[Brian Quinn]

You want to play the game or you want to talk about more stuff?

[Walt Flanagan]

I mean, what do you got?

[Brian Quinn]

I got. I was fucking annoyed on the plane, but, like, I don't know. How do you fly a lot? You're not always in first class.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No.

[Brian Quinn]

Sometimes you're a coach guy. What do you. How do you feel about people that put their fucking seats back for that extra fucking three inches of. It's not even relaxing. I guess you could tell how I feel about it. It's not like you kick back the three inches and you're like, ah. All you're doing is robbing the person behind you of three inches of legroom.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, I. I hear you. I don't know. It's. It's a sticky wicket. I don't. I. I usually don't put my seat back right. But I think I have a hard time because the back might hurt. I mean, it's. How long is the flight? You know what I mean?

[Brian Quinn]

Like, if that flight's less than two.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Hours, I don't know that I would. I think I would feel like someone has a. A right to put their seat.

[Walt Flanagan]

If the seat goes back.

[Brian Quinn]

They have that right. They definitely have the right. But a lot of people consider a common courtesy to not put it back.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't. I rarely put it back.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. I never do.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Unless if in a rare occasion, there's nobody behind me. And even then, I usually.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. I don't know. Usually. Yeah. I don't know. I don't think it would bother me. But I understand what you're saying, though. Yeah. It's already tight back there.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. And hot off the fucking. Tsh. And give me shit. I'm like, this fucking bitch is now gonna.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

One thing after another.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. I just wanted to get home. And then I got home, and my fucking cat dying. It was not a good return. But what are you gonna do?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Bad reentry.

[Brian Quinn]

What are you gonna do? What do I got here? I didn't investigate this, but I'm starting I read somewhere that Helen Keller is bullshit. That there was no way you could teach a blind deaf person how to read braille. They said that. What was her name? Annie Sullivan. Ann Sullivan. Was that her name? The lady who shepherded her around?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't know.

[Brian Quinn]

They said it was a money making opportunity.

[Bryan Johnson]

Annie Sullivan.

[Brian Quinn]

Annie Sullivan, yeah. That she really. It was just like a smoke and mirror stage show.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't know why.

[Brian Quinn]

I know. Like I said, I didn't get to investigate.

[Walt Flanagan]

What year was this? Would this have been Helen Keller, the.

[Brian Quinn]

Greatest liar in American history? This is from 2017.

[Walt Flanagan]

I know, but what year was Helen Keller alive?

[Brian Quinn]

Wasn't it the early 1900s? Get him. Let's find out. Let's see. 1880 to 1968. Damn, she was old.

[Walt Flanagan]

Wow.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

What makes you believe that article, though?

[Brian Quinn]

Because I like seeing shit uncovered. Like stuff that you thought was real.

[Bryan Johnson]

Smarter than I am.

[Brian Quinn]

Wait a second.

[Walt Flanagan]

Her IQ is what, 160? Yeah, but at least you could see. You can hear, right?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

You poned her, did you pone. Heller Keller?

[Brian Quinn]

Heller Keller, though she experienced blindness and deafness from infancy, demonstrating extraordinary intellect through her rapid learning of language and earning a college degree proving her exceptional cognitive capacity despite profound sensory impairments.

[Bryan Johnson]

So you think it was like facilitated communication?

[Brian Quinn]

Like Annie Sullivan was helping her along the way?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, like those. You know, it's sad when the parents are deceived, but like, you know, the ones who, like, they. They hold the kid's hand and like type out messages and stuff.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But she lived to 87 though, and like she. She did.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

She.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, she became an activist.

[Walt Flanagan]

You. You see that article and you immediately believe that there might be not be an agenda or like, you know, they're, you're. They're taking a stab at an icon.

[Brian Quinn]

She is an icon. But if she isn't deserving of it, I want her to get stabbed.

[Walt Flanagan]

Who's this fucking clown that wrote the article though? Why are you so willing to just.

[Brian Quinn]

Jack o', Shea, respected journalist from. What is this? Like a fucking elf? All right. I don't believe it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Just a little. I mean, he might have an agenda.

[Brian Quinn]

I told you I didn't do any. I didn't do any.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Sharpening his knives.

[Walt Flanagan]

And he's going after somebody just to get probably clicks.

[Brian Quinn]

You want some clicks?

[Walt Flanagan]

He's like, who can I go after that? People will click on it. I'll call Helen Keller a sham.

[Brian Quinn]

The Helen Keller scammer refers to modern day conspiracy theories often on social media. Like TikTok claiming she faked her deafness and blindness or accomplishments rooted in historical ableism that denied people with disabilities could achieve intellectual feats along a separate older plagiarism accusation over her story, the Frost King. Well, why haven't we seen another Helen Keller then? Why have we not seen another blind person who has achieved all this? Blind deaf person who's achieved all this shit. Stevie Wonder's not deaf.

[Walt Flanagan]

He isn't. I thought he was deaf, dumb and blind.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, he's not deaf.

[Brian Quinn]

He's just blind.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, but what does it mean to.

[Brian Quinn]

Call Helen Keller a fraud?

[Walt Flanagan]

But they're not stories that anybody cares about anymore. You know what gets more clicks Saying Helen Keller is a sham over the next Helen Keller. That's way more clickable story because it's negative. And it's like you're tearing down something that people hailed as a phenomenal achievement.

[Brian Quinn]

Right, like the moon landing. Yeah, people like to tear it down. I just. I have a hard time believing it too.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm worried about you and getting older and on the Internet, man, you just like, immediately, you're not. You're like, helen Keller was a sham and I'm not taking any more medicine.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Devil's potion, you know? Yeah, I don't know. Could be. I just want to know. Like, since 1968, we have not seen another Helen Keller come down the pike.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but you don't want to know because you've done no research.

[Brian Quinn]

Not that I've heard of any.

[Walt Flanagan]

But there might be another extraordinary person who has, who is blind and deaf or whatever, or mute or whatever, and has achieved anything. But you wouldn't know because it's not a story that that's going to make the rounds. That's a story that's too much of a good story.

[Brian Quinn]

I don't see why. Like, Helen Keller, too. Like, how is it? Like, that should be a movie.

[Walt Flanagan]

What are the. What are the things, though, that she can do or he could do in a post Helen Keller world now, I don't think there's a lot of injustices or.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, you're saying that the ableism doesn't exist.

[Walt Flanagan]

I think people care more and are more understanding and more compassionate than they were back in the 1800s. For somebody who dealt with what she was going through.

[Brian Quinn]

Sure.

[Walt Flanagan]

So there's no real big battle to fight anymore. People now, as a society, are more than willing to do whatever it takes to help those people try to live as normal a life as possible.

[Brian Quinn]

Does it make the deaf dumb and blind lazy then? If us able people are catering to Their every need, so they don't have to learn.

[Walt Flanagan]

Like you could ever call somebody who's dealing what they're dealing with, but now.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You'Re on Helen Keller's side.

[Walt Flanagan]

Their eyes don't. Their eyes don't. Their eyes don't work because they fucking closed them and took a nap. They don't work because they just don't work.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This space freely. Guy looks a lot like Monster Magnet.

[Brian Quinn]

He does. Yeah. He really does.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

For a second, I thought it was him.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's gotta be AI right.

[Bryan Johnson]

I don't think so.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You think so? Why?

[Bryan Johnson]

I said I don't think.

[Walt Flanagan]

It just looks, Looks too perfect, though.

[Bryan Johnson]

I don't think that looks perfect.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That guy looks perfect.

[Walt Flanagan]

I think it looked like the thumbs out of focus. Like his skin is, is so smooth.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, he definitely filters on his face.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You should slap a filter on that, right?

[Brian Quinn]

Surrounded by aces.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So I got ripped off in Key West.

[Brian Quinn]

What happened? The mayor of Key west got ripped off.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I couldn't believe it. I bought sunglasses. My sunglasses broke, so I went in to buy sunglasses. I had a nice chat with the lady. She sells me these sunglasses, 100 bucks, polarized. I'm like, all right, well, whatever, let's take it. I go on, I fucking get on the plane, I get on the breeze. The breeze flight, it falls off. I step on it, I break the arm. I'm like, ah. But I liked it when we go on Amazon and order 40 bucks on Amazon.

[Walt Flanagan]

Really? Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Taken like a pigeon plucked.

[Brian Quinn]

That was your first class seat on Breeze. 60 bucks, you got ripped off.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You know, and I know the shop and I know the lady. We had a nice conversation. But I guess, like.

[Brian Quinn]

Really?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Saw this pigeon coming up the fucking.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Walk, coming down the block and took me for over 100%.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Really? It was like, 40. She quick fucking crossed 10.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I got fucking boned. Oh, I was so unhappy.

[Brian Quinn]

I hate to hear that kind of shit because, like, that would bother me for days.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It, yeah, it didn't bother me. Like, I was just like, all right, you got me.

[Bryan Johnson]

What are you?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's what I get for just fucking walking in, like, on the mayo there.

[Brian Quinn]

For these.

[Bryan Johnson]

I remember that happened. I was, I was working at a gas station and some guy came in. Oh, I, I, I, I sell Oakley's and I got these Oakleys. I can let you have them for like, 20, $40.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

I was like, oh, hell yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They were so.

[Brian Quinn]

Please. Yeah, yeah, Exactly.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yes. Oh, man. I don't know what to do about it. There's nothing.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, Go Back with the broken arm glass and be like, hey, man, let the buyer be.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I did the polka on them and the breeze.

[Brian Quinn]

You were annoyed.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But yeah, I mean. But let the buyer beware, right? I'm the only one responsible for that. I could have done a quick Internet search.

[Walt Flanagan]

I have come into possession of something that has catapulted within a matter of hours of owning it to become my most prized possession.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Whoa, what's that?

[Walt Flanagan]

It is something called.

[Brian Quinn]

He has it with him.

[Walt Flanagan]

A VC box.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

A VC box. Smart media player.

[Brian Quinn]

S E E box.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Where did you get this?

[Walt Flanagan]

I cannot say where I got this.

[Brian Quinn]

I know where you got it.

[Walt Flanagan]

You cannot.

[Brian Quinn]

I'm not gonna say, but I can't believe I haven't gotten one yet. And you're listening, motherfucker.

[Walt Flanagan]

This device.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yes.

[Walt Flanagan]

Allows me to view anything on the planet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Any network.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's like a cracked code, broke like.

[Brian Quinn]

A fire stick, except better.

[Walt Flanagan]

I don't even know how to describe the wonders.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Do they have to.

[Walt Flanagan]

This box has. When you open this box, it is like Pandora's literal box. You. There's no.

[Brian Quinn]

It's lost for days. Right?

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, my God. There's nothing inside of it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I just want to see what the box clean. Is it doing its intended purpose or. This is jailbroken.

[Walt Flanagan]

And we don't want to. We don't like to talk in terms like jailbroken.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But there's a program on this that gives you access to everything.

[Walt Flanagan]

There is a program that gives me access to almost every piece of media that exists on the planet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Live sports.

[Bryan Johnson]

Except Beretta.

[Walt Flanagan]

Except. Yeah. The only thing I can't find, the TV show Beretta. But Robert Blake, that was the first thing I couldn't find when I searched it. But it is a wonder. It is like the greatest invention since fire.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But it's stealing.

[Brian Quinn]

Some people would call it that.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's why I want to liberate it to Johnny Law. I want to get his. Because I have an opportunity to become the only licensed VC box sales agent in the Monmouth and Ocean county area.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Where I could be selling these boxes to people I know. For the low, low price of $299.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Let me ask you something.

[Brian Quinn]

That seems worth it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. For a lot. But I'm worried, though.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Is it new stuff? Like as. As HBO airs a new Game of Thrones? It's pot. It pops up on this.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yes. It also has stuff that hasn't even been in theaters yet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I have family members that have something like this.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't like It. Why is it stealing?

[Walt Flanagan]

It's not stealing.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Of course it is.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's not stealing. Well, what if I don't utilize those aspects of the box though? Because all I've been doing so I've been staying up. This is a dangerous device right here.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Because I'm staying up till like 6 o' clock in the morning, you know, watching shows that I haven't seen in, in decades, like Mary Tyler Moore. I'm like, I think I went three days without sleep watching Mary Tyler Moore and I have it. Like I could watch that Neil diamond movie.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

But I don't watch it because I'm like, you're right. I'm like, I'm not. I mean, I don't want to like steal.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's a cable box all over again.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, it is. Yeah. My wife is terrified of this. She thinks this is a serpent, you know, that's going to bite us.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I know a lot of people that have it and the serpent hasn't come for them.

[Walt Flanagan]

But I also worry that I only paid a one time fee for it. And at some point someone's going to turn the faucet off.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's going to get bricked. Yeah, but what is the purpose of this thing without the illegal aspect of it?

[Brian Quinn]

What?

[Walt Flanagan]

It has everything I want.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, but that's not what. They can't sell it with that purpose. Like what is the purpose of the.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, you can add whatever you want to it, then that's up to you to load it up with what you're like.

[Brian Quinn]

We're just providing the box.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, we provide you the technology. It's how you use it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's why it's not illegal to have this box. That's how I tell my wife.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But.

[Walt Flanagan]

There is. I could make a lot of money selling these around here, man. I could go up and down this plaza and be rolling in it.

[Brian Quinn]

You're gonna be like the Oakley's guy. People like what, $300?

[Walt Flanagan]

But I'm worried though though. Then if I start selling them though, when they eventually the faucet gets turned off, they're gonna come looking for me.

[Brian Quinn]

They want their money back. Monmouth County?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Could be.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. That's what I don't wanna do. I want to talk to Johnny about the cause. I think this is the definition of a victimless crime.

[Brian Quinn]

Right. Q's face so perplexed.

[Walt Flanagan]

How is that this is the absolute leg of victimless crime?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't see it that way.

[Walt Flanagan]

Why was it not? Who's the victim here? Disney.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

All the People that are making the show that you're stealing for free.

[Walt Flanagan]

What? Mary Tyler Moore? They're all dead. They're all dead.

[Bryan Johnson]

There's no.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm not stealing any of the shows that people care about. Like, I'm not stealing, like, the new shit.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but people are.

[Walt Flanagan]

People are.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but because of stuff like this.

[Walt Flanagan]

But if they were to take my device and confiscate it and then, like, open up the guts, they'd be like, he has a stolen.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Well, you said sports.

[Walt Flanagan]

I haven't really watched any of the sports.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't know about this. You got to be honest with Johnny Lowell. You can't be shuffling shot like I see you doing right now. Trying to get out of being wrong.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, let's call him and see where I.

[Bryan Johnson]

You can't be like me at the doctor. I only have three beers a night.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm telling you, though, I think I could clean up.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You probably could. Yeah, but you're right. Like, what if you sell 10 of them and then the next day they brick them all?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, well, let Bayer beware. Buyer beware. Just like you said. Caveat emptor business.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They're breaking the law. They're criminals.

[Bryan Johnson]

The Baron does say caveat emptor.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Is it going to hold up on some of them by his throat? There you go.

[Bryan Johnson]

You sell it as the Baron.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I mean, maybe if you just like, look, this could get. I don't know.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, we got to put our things on.

[Brian Quinn]

I don't know if how much that would increase his credibility to dress as the Baron himself.

[Bryan Johnson]

No, he can call it the Baron the way by box.

[Brian Quinn]

Good.

[Walt Flanagan]

Ooh, I like that. The Baron box. I could sell them to listeners.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, listeners would definitely.

[Walt Flanagan]

They would almost, like, be gleeful if it was like, it got bricked and I was like, hey, caveat emptor.

[Bryan Johnson]

They. They come signed.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, with a sticker on it.

[Brian Quinn]

Would you sign a queue or is that against your princess?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What's that? Sorry.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm gonna start selling them to listeners and.

[Brian Quinn]

And signing it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I'll do that.

[Walt Flanagan]

Did you call him?

[Brian Quinn]

I'll call. Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm telling you, man, it has been. All I do is think about it, though. I worry when I'm here. I'm like, when I get home, is it still going to work? Is it still.

[Brian Quinn]

Am I still.

[Walt Flanagan]

My show is still going to be available to watch.

[Bryan Johnson]

He tracks his doors.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You got it for free.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, 240. But I'm going to sell them for 300 when I start become a VC. Licensed distributor in Mammoth in Ocean County.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Johnny Law.

[Brian Quinn]

Johnny Law. What's up, baby?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Doing great, Doing great.

[Brian Quinn]

Sounds good.

[Walt Flanagan]

So, Johnny, we wanted to talk to you to get a legal, kind of in a murky situation here, I have this, not surprising, this box called the VC box. And you hook it up to your TV and it comes with this remote control that basically allows you to watch TV in Russia and Israel, all over the world. There's nothing I can't watch. And I'm like, well, why am I being deprived of this? Why? This is. Why do my governments want me not to be able to watch what's going on?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This is a spin that I didn't hear, I didn't hear about Israeli television. He's explaining it to me a couple minutes ago.

[Walt Flanagan]

But Q is kind of harsh on my buzz and he's not on board because he thinks it's stealing. And I told him I believe this is the definition of victimless crime, the VC box.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Really?

[Walt Flanagan]

Do you say.

[Brian Quinn]

Well.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

You know, here's the thing. I think Q is probably right here. So I don't know that it's illegal for you to get access to Russian television or Israeli television, but I think that's probably fine as long as they're not subscription based. But when you're talking about a box that allows you to access subscription based content, the box itself is legal. There's like a technical loophole there where the actual box is legal. But if you access subscription based or unlicensed, I should say unlicensed content, then that is illegal.

[Walt Flanagan]

And what kind of. What are the ramifications if I were to be caught?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This is all he cares about.

[Walt Flanagan]

So, yeah, of course, if I were to be caught, but with the box, using it to watch something other than Happy Days.

[Brian Quinn]

So.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Potentially there's two things that could happen, right? The first is very unlikely. The first would be criminal charges, right. Since it would be contrary to federal law. So likely criminal charges would be levied against not the user, but. But the distributor. So as a user, it's very unlikely that you would face actual criminal charges. What's a little bit more likely would be civil penalties. And it's possible that if there was a lawsuit, you could have to pay damages based on the unlicensed access of that content. Now, I will say there is a big exception here, and that is a huge exception. And I think you guys will be pleasantly surprised about this one. Now, if we're talking about someone trying to access Patreon content, no, that's a required jail sentence. So, you know, Anyone out there that's trying to access that, I would strongly suggest they stop.

[Walt Flanagan]

You know what? There's no way that this box has Patreon content on it.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

No.

[Brian Quinn]

No.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

So.

[Walt Flanagan]

But you know what? Then again, I haven't looked for it, though.

[Brian Quinn]

Can't remember that you can find the Sunday Jeff show. You know what, though, Walt?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

The bigger problem here for the user isn't so much the legality, but a lot of these boxes have malware backdoors, which means that they can gain access to your devices, your network, the computer systems that you have, and they can steal data from you, they can redirect, you know, where your Internet traffic is going, stuff like that. So it is potentially dangerous for the user. Most of these companies are Chinese.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, but I had Gitam hook it up for me. So he told me, checked it out.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I'm sorry, I didn't realize that was.

[Brian Quinn]

You didn't realize I had the GIDEM seal of approval. You're good.

[Walt Flanagan]

Gidem hooked it up. He told me that, like, I have something called the vpn.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

You said that you have a virtual public network.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, I have. Yeah. I have that on this box, though. Would that help?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

It could, yeah, it definitely will help, but I don't know enough to say for sure.

[Brian Quinn]

I would.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

You know what? If Gidham says you're good, then go with Vaughn. That's what I think.

[Brian Quinn]

Well, do you think Walt could also make the argument that since Gidham set it up, he should be the one to go to jail?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I think that's. I think that's right on. Any username should be in Getums.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I argue that, like, it actually hurts because for somebody to air Mary Tyler Moore, they had to pay for the license to air it. And you're circumventing that now. These poor people have put their faith in Mary Tyler Moore. They're like, people will watch it. She is still popular. The old gal still got it. And then by circumventing that, you're taking away the value of. You're devaluing the Mary Tyler Moore show.

[Brian Quinn]

How dare you do that to multi.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Billion dollar people who believe in it and are like, we're willing to pay for it to air it on what if.

[Walt Flanagan]

What if I own the box set of DVDs though I already bought it already. I'm just watching it a different way.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

That's a full defense.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. I actually could. I could buy that one. I could buy that one.

[Walt Flanagan]

I could show you proof. I have the box.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I believe you. I never know when you like?

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Q's, right, though. I mean, like, you know, I don't know that it's the Mary Tyler Moore generation that's going to be, you know, utilizing these, like, backdoor streaming services. But, yeah, I mean, you're. It puts a chilling effect on going out and licensing stuff probably. You know, it definitely eats into their profits.

[Brian Quinn]

Have you watched Jokers at all on this VC box?

[Walt Flanagan]

I have not.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Definitely there, I'm sure. Yeah, sure.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, yeah, I think that the channels are there, right? Normally, yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I mean, this. There's a lot of different ways to look at it, I guess, but to me, it's just like it does instantly, like, if you do it and 10,000 other people do it, it does. It does make it worth less to the people who paid for the license. So it does. But, you know, if somebody said to me, hey, I bought all the Joker seasons that are available on dvd, but I stream it through this box, you know, what are you gonna do? I kind of see that angle a little bit.

[Walt Flanagan]

So, Johnny, do you want to buy a box?

[Bryan Johnson]

It's signed.

[Walt Flanagan]

What would you say, like, just as some legal advice, would you say yay or nay to the prospect of me ordering 100 boxes and then trying to flip them at a profit?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I would say nay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Nay.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. Because I was good.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I would definitely say nay day.

[Brian Quinn]

But I remember, like, you could be the guy, man. Because I remember, like, my mother, like, she worked at Monmouth Medical Center Hospital. She knew somebody there whose son would sell cable boxes just like you had. I remember going over to his house. It was like this little apartment, and it was like a hundred bucks. And he sold me a cable box that he had. He had a ton of them.

[Walt Flanagan]

Did it work?

[Brian Quinn]

It worked. It worked perfectly.

[Walt Flanagan]

Until eventually stopped working.

[Brian Quinn]

Till eventually stopped working. Sure.

[Bryan Johnson]

Could we rent the yarn lady's old store?

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Like, I have a storefront.

[Walt Flanagan]

Flanagan's VC boxes and more and more.

[Bryan Johnson]

We can use the sun downstairs.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

So now. Yeah, you know, Walt, if you start selling, here's the big problem. You're going from a user to potentially a distributor.

[Walt Flanagan]

Right?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

And that could carry, you know, criminal penalties.

[Walt Flanagan]

It could, but it also could carry big fat fucking wallet that even Ridge can't fucking sustain the money. That's.

[Brian Quinn]

That's saying a lot that I'd be bringing it in.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Can't you do a bonus episode or something?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But let's do the math. If you sell it for 300 bucks a pop and you sell how many.

[Brian Quinn]

What are you buying for?

[Walt Flanagan]

240 240.

[Brian Quinn]

So it's 60 bucks. So you can make six grand.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, six grand. And, you know, there's tax free. Yeah. That's nuts. They'll be coming in by the boatload once the word gets out then that the yarn lady's old studio is now selling hot boxes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I just don't think it's worth it, man. No.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

No.

[Walt Flanagan]

So I should. So you're saying, though, Q has put the. Has guilted me into thinking I should pull the plug on my VC box.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

If it were me. I don't know that. I think the combination of what Q said and the combination of just not being 100% sure about the security of it would make me pull the plug.

[Walt Flanagan]

Really?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Now, would you say the same for, like, these fire sticks that get jailbroken.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

So. Not necessarily, because the boxes usually come delivered with a malware backdoor already. It's not like it's getting infected or when you start it up, there's already an entry into that system built in. And so that's why I think there's a big difference there.

[Walt Flanagan]

But I'm not.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I'm not a security professional, but I would stay away.

[Brian Quinn]

I'm looking at Walt's boxer. It looks professional as hell. They have their own website.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Listen, for all we know, these are mostly all Chinese companies. For all we know, this is the Chinese government that's. That's, you know, behind.

[Brian Quinn]

They're trying to steal our information, trying.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

To steal IP and stuff like that. So you just don't know.

[Brian Quinn]

Trump's gonna have to plan VC bucks.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I would bet, Walt, that if you want to get in contact with customer service, it would basically be impossible.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, you're probably right.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

But, my God, to give it up now would be devastating.

[Brian Quinn]

You already spent the money.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

You got a taste.

[Walt Flanagan]

I know. Yeah. Because. No, I got it. It's not the money so much as that. Like, the joy it brought me for these last seven days where I was just like.

[Brian Quinn]

Bust out the DVDs.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, it was just like, I would type in the most crazy old show and it would show up, and I would be like. If you told my child self this in 1977, that one day I would own something that would allow me to watch anything at any time on any continent. I would be like, dude, life is so fucking well.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

The only thing you have to add to that is and not pay for it, because everybody has that. It's called an Apple tv. You're just talking about not paying for it.

[Walt Flanagan]

I did pay for it. 240 bucks, but I know.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Well, get him. Did you do a search for VC box malware?

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, my God. He was giving me all the horror stories, trying to harsh my buzz, just like you. Instead of being supported.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I have friends and I have family members that have the fire stick one or whatever it is. And I, you know, they've offered it to me and I have tell them I don't. I don't want it on principle, but I don't judge them for it. I just like stupid.

[Walt Flanagan]

I know you. I know you will, though. Even if you're not.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I'll think it's a little. It's a little. It's a little chink in your. In your moral armor. That's the only thing.

[Walt Flanagan]

If it didn't have.

[Brian Quinn]

That's all you need.

[Walt Flanagan]

If it didn't have.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Mary brings down an army.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, that's. My wife said it's the. It's the serpent on the tree limb offering the apple. Am I going to take a bite?

[Bryan Johnson]

The apple is married.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Sounds like you've been chewing for seven days. Take a bite.

[Brian Quinn]

He's gone through an orchard.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Let's have an apple pie.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's just too good to be true.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What's the worst that malware can do to this? You're not putting in your personal information or anything like that?

[Walt Flanagan]

Like.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, it can inject software into your network and look at your network usage and packets and stuff going through your network.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But how do you fight against that?

[Bryan Johnson]

You have to put it on its own network that's, you know, segregated, firewalled from.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Once that's in your network, how do you get it out?

[Bryan Johnson]

That's the tough part.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Right. What's the answer?

[Bryan Johnson]

I probably just have to tear it down and reinstall everything from the.

[Walt Flanagan]

You mean the house?

[Bryan Johnson]

The computer network.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but he doesn't have a. Gotta.

[Brian Quinn]

Give you a new roof.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But his computer network is most likely John. Just the modem from the local.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, I have a desktop and all.

[Bryan Johnson]

His phones that use WI fi.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Right. That connect to WI fi. So if you're, for example, putting in your banking account credentials, you're logging in, it's possible that they could, you know, be monitoring your network and even be able to like, kind of monitor the keystrokes that you make on a computer.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's fucking scary.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

If he's doing it from home. If he's doing it from the wifi on his phone, on his WI fi. Right, Gotcha.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's scary, but it's not as scary as not being able to Watch Mary Tyler more whenever I want.

[Bryan Johnson]

At 6am.

[Brian Quinn]

Would you say it's 6am.

[Bryan Johnson]

So. So the next time you ask for someone's location at the checkup, if your wife just goes, why don't you watch Mary Tyler Moore?

[Walt Flanagan]

It feels like. It just feels like I only got it. It. I only got to taste paradise for such a short period of time. For me, I don't really rip it out. I was really hoping you could just tell, you know, tell me something. I could tell my wife that she could just stop like you know, fretting about it and just tell her it's, it's cool and everything's going to be awesome.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You can tell her that. It's just.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

You can tell her that.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Total lie.

[Walt Flanagan]

But you just told me that like it could infect if I tell. If I go home and tell her. It can infect if I use the word infect.

[Brian Quinn]

Right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You're done.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'll never watch TV again. Oh my God. This is. I really thought this was not going to go that way.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Can you get a, can you get a refund?

[Walt Flanagan]

No, I can't get a refund. No, it's not, it's not the initial investment that bums me out. It's the prospect of losing something that absolutely just was just an, an absolute rush. It was better than drugs. Yeah, just.

[Brian Quinn]

We could debate that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What about like 2B? You can't just go on Tubi and like find there.

[Brian Quinn]

This shit's commercial free, right? You're just watching episodes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but that's again like to be. Does this is what I'm saying. Like, like Tubi is successful because it will be like nobody's airing Mary Tyler Moore or that elk. I'll put it on there. We'll pay for the license, we'll get it up there. The only thing is you got to sit through some commercials. Like that's a fair. Yeah, that's a fair trade.

[Walt Flanagan]

But then it's also got the NFL to be. Don't have the NFL. Well, I hear you.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I hear you.

[Walt Flanagan]

I type in NFL all the time on tubi.

[Brian Quinn]

There's no matches.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I hear you.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

What you could do also is like I have Roku and you can just do. There's a general search function on Roku where I can search anything and it's probably going to be on one of the channels and you can just do, you know, do one of those seven day trials or whatever on, on any of these like subscription based thing. You watch a show and then you.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Cancel it, you know.

[Brian Quinn]

That sounds like a lot more work than just seeing.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Maybe you just put it away for like a week.

[Brian Quinn]

For.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

For.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And then just break it up.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

One week a year.

[Brian Quinn]

You don't understand Johnny Law.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I mean, this conversation.

[Bryan Johnson]

This is like when Starsky was hooked on the junk.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This conversation moves then into, like, how do you prevent malware from infecting your system? Or how do you get it off? That, to me, is, Couldn't it do.

[Brian Quinn]

It even without the VC box?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, if you can nail this. If you can nail that, then you.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I bet if. I bet if you just had a completely separate network that you only used for.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, we needed an IT answer.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah, we need an IT answer.

[Walt Flanagan]

The curator can help me.

[Brian Quinn]

Curator's an IT guy.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'll give you a box. Curator. Free bucks. Please curate. You got to help me. I'm. Like, the prospect of me not having. This is a life I don't want to live anymore. I don't want to live in a world where I don't have this anymore. I love this. This is the greatest thing that I've ever come across. I don't care what you guys say, I'm keeping it.

[Brian Quinn]

Hey, I'm all for it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I bet you Tommy Lincoln can help. He's a computer whiz.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, that's right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. I think if you can answer that.

[Walt Flanagan]

Question, I'm going to ask Tommy.

[Brian Quinn]

There's anybody within a thousand miles I could help Walt.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, so your suggestions are. Don't use the word infected when I talk to my wife later. If I say I talked to a lawyer.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Exactly.

[Walt Flanagan]

You did say it's fine. We won't probably ever face any real repercussions from the law.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This is something.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Oh, yeah, right.

[Walt Flanagan]

John. Like, it would be a sharp on the wrist.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This is like you with the pills. This is the exact same shit that we went through.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, well, let me.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Twisted logic.

[Brian Quinn]

Twisted logic. Rationalizing. Justifying.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Walt, I'll write you a letter on my letterhead that you can give to your wife telling you it's okay to use it.

[Brian Quinn]

Awesome.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's all I need.

[Brian Quinn]

You got to put a wax seal on it or something so she knows it's legit.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Exactly.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Okay.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You're gonna bring us all down. He's gonna get disbarred. We're all gonna get.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

We're all going to prison.

[Walt Flanagan]

You know, my wife brought up a story. Now, I know you. You listened to tsd. John.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yes.

[Walt Flanagan]

Before. You know, before you came on. On tsd. Do you remember that? I had a cable Box story.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

You did. I. And it was given to you by one of your relatives.

[Walt Flanagan]

My brother in law and my wife, you know, went over the story again. Do you remember how much I strike this family went through because of your obsession with.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

That's right.

[Walt Flanagan]

Getting free cable.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And I was like.

[Brian Quinn]

There isn't a history there.

[Walt Flanagan]

This is something I've always chased is the cable cops.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

The cable cops may come again.

[Walt Flanagan]

Right? So she told me something about that story that a new revelation that I didn't even know about. So like a little, a little quick retell them, Steve, Dave segment here. Years ago, my brother in law worked for a cable company and gave me a loaded box, they called it. And it was magnificent. Didn't have it for that long. One morning I'm getting ready to go to work and I look outside and put my shoes on and two guys in suits and long trench coats get out of a car. And I go to myself, oh, wonder where these guys are going, you know, because. And I go, they don't. They look too professional to be down here. And then I see him start to come up my stairs and I'm like, what the do these clowns want? I open a door and they say who they're with, the cable provider they're with. And I'm like, are they trying to get me to upgrade to like HBO and Cinemax? Why are they here? And they finally like, hey, we know you have a cheater box and we know who gave it to you and we want it. And I slammed the door in their face. I told them I didn't have that box. I ran upstairs, got that box that I did have and put it in my bag and went to work at the stash in a panic. Tried to call my wife and told her that, you know, like, you know.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Put it in Mike's backpack.

[Bryan Johnson]

Strap it to a cinder block, throw it off the bridge.

[Walt Flanagan]

She's working in school, she's in class. And I get her out of class to tell her that like, you know, it's over, like we're going down and we gotta make our. We gotta get tickets to Mexico immediately and we're on the next flight. But I told her and she kind of was like, she couldn't really talk about it. She hung up on me. I got to work and I'm in a panic. And then all of a sudden the relative walks through with the same two guys through the stash doors and is like, he all very. He's in a state of humiliation and shock and he's like, hey, do you have the box with you? If you do, I need it. And the jig was up. I knew I had to give him the box, but that. The revelation that I don't think I told in your story, maybe I did, was. He was set up.

[Brian Quinn]

Get out of here. Whoa.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, he was actually not set up. He was. He. It was. Somebody narcked on him. Somebody who worked in the company, narked on him and got the information from his ex. Wife.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, no.

[Walt Flanagan]

She wants. She wanted to make. Make him feel some pain. And that's. And she went and told this guy.

[Brian Quinn]

And then he told women.

[Walt Flanagan]

Powers that be.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Wicked web.

[Brian Quinn]

Damn.

[Bryan Johnson]

Was there a reward? You know.

[Walt Flanagan]

So she tried to tell me that and to try to like, be like you. We don't need that in our life again. I was like, shut up. It's not gonna happen again. There's no way that can happen.

[Bryan Johnson]

You know, some people. Some people search for this, for the Holy Grail. Some people search for the Sorcerer Stone. You just want free cable. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's all I wanted out of life.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Which is funny, cuz, like, you could have it. All you gotta do is pay like 10 bucks a month.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, no, it's not. Cable is so expensive.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, I know, I know.

[Walt Flanagan]

It's hypocritical too, because, you know, other people are out there right now going like, I'll go steal that TSD Patreon.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Shit I just made. The add ons were like 10 bucks a month. You're already paying for cable.

[Walt Flanagan]

Not anymore. I got this sucker. I canceled that. I canceled that the next day. Did you really?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, my God. So Deb has to use that if she wants to watch something. You are drawing her in.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, if she wants to watch something. Yeah, she's got to. She's got to sit on that fucking couch.

[Bryan Johnson]

Couch?

[Walt Flanagan]

The. The devil couch. And here, take a bite of this apple. It tastes good, don't it? Oh, yummy.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Track your location. It's gonna be in hell. This is evil.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, do you real quick, John, you want to play a game?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

That we came up with called the get him you and get him. No. Get him. You actually came up with it. It was his idea.

[Bryan Johnson]

Don't say that.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm in. So. And you. You guys.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay, so Bryke and Q. And you will write down what you think is a real conversation that Gidem had with his nurses during his hospital stay.

[Brian Quinn]

That's good.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, so there's three of them that are real out of nine, so there's six that are not real, and there are three that are real. You can ask Gitum. I'm just gonna give you the headline of what the conversation was. You then can ask Gidem a question about that headline to see if you feel like, yeah, this is something this motherfucker would definitely say to one of his nurses.

[Brian Quinn]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. Are you ready, John?

[Brian Quinn]

I'm ready.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't have a pen.

[Walt Flanagan]

I thought I gave you a pen.

[Brian Quinn]

They gave me.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, here you go. There we go, brother.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Thank you.

[Walt Flanagan]

The gift of Gidham's gift of gab, number one. Did he talk to his nurses about the mystery of Gidham's physical issues being mostly prevalent in Asians and the possibility, the endless hours of eating at the China Buffet being a possible answer to this medical mystery? You want to ask Ghetto anything about that?

[Brian Quinn]

So he goes. So his symptoms are mostly found in Asians.

[Walt Flanagan]

What he's dealing with is mostly found in Asian men and women, Asian men and women, elderly Asian men.

[Brian Quinn]

And he suspects that going to the China Buffet or the Chinese buffet could have possibly.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Contributed to that.

[Bryan Johnson]

The massive ingestion of Chinese spices and.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, really? I thought maybe it was like MSG and shit.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Like, it was like hair. Like hair or saliva dropped into the buffet or something from the.

[Bryan Johnson]

No. 1 of the buffet with me.

[Walt Flanagan]

You tell me all the time you're picking hair out of your teeth when you eat there.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. What is it called again? It's called China Buffet. Yeah, because I saw something about. On. On. On t. About China buffet. They had 177 violations. Holy. I doubt it's the one you went. But I was like, holy shit.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Is that even possible?

[Brian Quinn]

I don't know. I don't know.

[Walt Flanagan]

So where was this at?

[Brian Quinn]

I don't know. I missed where it was. Oh, it came halfway. Yeah, it was on tv. Oh, it probably wasn't.

[Walt Flanagan]

It probably wasn't the one.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, no, no. Probably not the one. Get him. Goes to.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You understand that American Chinese food is nothing like Chinese Chinese food.

[Bryan Johnson]

It's. Everyone there is Chinese, so.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, I know, but it's Americanized Chinese food.

[Brian Quinn]

I went to a real Chinese restaurant with Cubans. It looked. It was disgusting. The stuff. They're like duck eyeballs and, like, all kinds of nasty shit that, like, you would never consider eating even for the. I went to.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah, I went to China for about a month, and I gotta say, you know, I. It was definitely not the same. I felt like I was gonna get, like, Chinese malware. Yes. I definitely Lost weight.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Do you want to ask anything about that, John?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah, so I know that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I know that.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I think on the last episode, you had said you had caught some kind of. You had gotten something that was, you know, related to Chinese people. What was the specific issue that you thought was linked to you eating at the buffet?

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, it's the. The opll, which is ossification of some ligament in my spinal column which presses on the spinal cord, is primarily. It's a genetic condition found primarily in Asian people, but now it's being elderly Asian people. Elderly Asian men and women now has been starting to be found in Caucasians.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

So you think that eating at the Chinese buffet may have changed your genetics?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, it may have activated a dormant gene that normally isn't active.

[Walt Flanagan]

He's a mutant. He's going to Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Children this semester, which is.

[Bryan Johnson]

Which is why it's being found more in Caucasian people.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I have a question.

[Bryan Johnson]

He.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He has. When we ask him questions, he has to tell us the truth or he's trying to trick us.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, these are. He has to tell the truth. He's telling the truth right now.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So you seriously didn't know that American Chinese food, you, a genius, didn't know that American Chinese food isn't like Chinese food? Are you saying that for a joke?

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, I'm saying is that they.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's a yes or no question.

[Bryan Johnson]

It is different. Yes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You know that?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. Okay.

[Bryan Johnson]

But the spices and such aren't different.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yes, of course they are.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, you think they use a different kind of pepper?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, I think that the way that they prepare the food is different from the way they prepared food there. So they would be using different spices. Of course. Pepper used the world. Right. You don't think Chinese pepper is different from American pepper?

[Bryan Johnson]

No.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So that pepper would have nothing to do with this then.

[Bryan Johnson]

But in the combination.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You're saying Chinese spices. I'm saying what Chinese spices?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yes, the combination of that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Them. You think the level of pepper and salt somehow.

[Bryan Johnson]

No, the different. Like. Like if they use star anise or they use Majoram, but Americans use that. But not in the combinations that they possibly use them in. In the Chinese food.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But it's American Chinese. But it's American Chinese food.

[Bryan Johnson]

But the prevalence.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But it's American Chinese food. It's not the same type of food.

[Bryan Johnson]

Just like, remember in the original Batman, it wasn't that you used the deodorant, it was that you use a deodorant in combination with mouthwash.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I Understand your point, but what I'm saying is they don't use those mixtures in China. They don't. That's the whole point.

[Bryan Johnson]

I don't know.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

They don't serve the fucking food there. So they wouldn't use the same amount of spices because they're not serving the food.

[Bryan Johnson]

But it's the spices that they're used to, so they. They use wouldn't.

[Walt Flanagan]

The fact that they're used.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

How many of these are fake, these stories?

[Walt Flanagan]

Six.

[Brian Quinn]

Six are fake. Furious.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, he's being too obtuse for this.

[Walt Flanagan]

What about the water, though?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He doesn't want to answer the fucking question.

[Walt Flanagan]

Since it's an American water, would that play a factor?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I actually, I don't know enough about Chinese water to answer that.

[Walt Flanagan]

Right. You don't think it was like, you know, like.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

But what, are they importing water from China here? Are they putting spices in the water in Jersey?

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm saying it's like Montezuma's revenge, though. Like, you know, or what's it called? Osteoptosis revenge that you got going on.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This proves my point. They're using American water. Those things are not in issue here.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay, all right, yeah, let's go on to number two. That he created a game for a podcast.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Hold on. Yes, because the problem is it's so frustrating that I would think in a normal person it can't be true, but because it's him, it fucking can be true.

[Brian Quinn]

And it sounds like you had the conversation, by the way he's talking about it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Like, no, to me, it sounds like he's trying to fucking cover up and lie and not answer my question.

[Brian Quinn]

He was smiling.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, that's why. Yeah, all right, all right.

[Walt Flanagan]

Gift of gab. Option two, that he created a game for a podcast called gidemtration. You can ask Gatim questions. Why he would even. Why would this even come up?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's what I believe is true.

[Brian Quinn]

For a second I was like, yeah, that's true. I was like, oh, wait, he's telling a nurse this. That's right.

[Walt Flanagan]

He's bragging to his nurses about it. These conversation topics are. Did he actually have these conversations while in the hospital?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay, so the answer to me and to me is not the question of the question is do I think that Gidham would bring up two nurses that he created a game on a podcast?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Cute nurses. Q. Cute nurses.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

To me, the answer, these are 20 something year old hottie nurses.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't even need to ask him a question.

[Walt Flanagan]

Of course he would I went to visit him. It looked like I was like, these. These are only fans, Mom.

[Bryan Johnson]

These aren't nurses.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Like, I don't even need to ask him how it came up, because I know how it came up. It was came up. He just brought up within the first.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah, within the first five minutes of coming out. He was talking about it.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, he was talking about a podcast. The podcast he was on. And then. Yo. And sometimes I develop games for him.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I don't know if you're a fan of Impractical Jokers, but I actually know. You know, I do a podcast with them.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, I got four texts about it.

[Bryan Johnson]

Don't let him chew on that.

[Walt Flanagan]

Please don't let him show him what.

[Bryan Johnson]

Piece of the chair.

[Walt Flanagan]

So, Teddy, Naughty dog. Got it?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

Good.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, all right. Option. Or get him gab. 3. Did he tell his nurses or talk about him having a black walking cane but really wanting a green one and how he solved the problem while he.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Was in the hospital?

[Walt Flanagan]

While he was in the hospital.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Did you have a cane while you were in the hospital or did you get it after the hospital?

[Bryan Johnson]

I got it after the hospital, but while I was still in rehab.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So it's not while you were in the hospital then?

[Walt Flanagan]

It was after rehab.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I considered trying to find the.

[Walt Flanagan]

You know, it was in Riverview Hospital.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay, got you.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Now, had you given your cane, the original cane, to your father already?

[Bryan Johnson]

No, not at the time when you.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Were in the rehab?

[Bryan Johnson]

No, not at that point.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, that you've given away. That you've let the cat out of the bag, Johnny. That's how he solved this fucking snafu with the. This major problem was giving the cane away, giving the black cane to his father. Is this rise to the level of a conversation to have with another human being?

[Brian Quinn]

Sees, like, all this shit, knowing him. Yeah. Yeah. Like, all of it could be a yes. Like, I can't believe that six of them are fake.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Get him.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

How many?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

How many? How many? How many times when you got out of the hospital, did you tell that story, do you think?

[Bryan Johnson]

Oh, I told it to Jeff yesterday.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Did you tell someone the story before you told the nurse or was a nurse the very first?

[Bryan Johnson]

These were things I told. There was a prompt to them being told. I just didn't come out of the blue and say them.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What was the prompt on this one?

[Bryan Johnson]

The prompt on that one was they commented on the color of the cane.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Which at the time was.

[Bryan Johnson]

It was green. I had them both at the same time.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

The prompt was hello.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

Number four. How someone threw out his special spoon.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What's the special spoon story?

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay, tell it.

[Bryan Johnson]

I ordered a set of titanium spoons, like, back in 2019, and while I was gone, it was on the table here. And it mysteriously disappeared after he wanted.

[Walt Flanagan]

Me to bring it to him, and I couldn't find it.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, after someone recorded an episode of their. Their Christmas special. Here.

[Walt Flanagan]

Chuck.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

When was the last time you saw these spoons?

[Bryan Johnson]

It was before I. He left.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And you. You were using them constantly? They were in.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yes, it's. Yeah, it's my. That's cutlery that I use instead of plastic. Titanium.

[Brian Quinn]

Where do you think it possibly could have gone?

[Bryan Johnson]

I think it went to the trash.

[Brian Quinn]

You think they threw it away on you?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, just like our missing SD card.

[Brian Quinn]

Mm.

[Walt Flanagan]

I think it was an accident. Of course. I think they were cleaning up after they recorded, and they were like, what's this dirty spoon doing here?

[Brian Quinn]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

Let's do Walt a favor and get rid of this stinky spoon and threw it out.

[Brian Quinn]

Let's do Walter favor and get him a disservice.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So the story is true. It's just a question of whether he told the nurses it or not. Okay, I get it.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

The story's definitely true. Cause he brought this up. He brought this up in some text messages. So I can definitely confirm the story is true.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's why this game is hard. I'm not going to give you any easy ones.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, okay. All right. I'm developing an opinion.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. Okay. Number five. If not for his dribbling little giddum and passing gas, he might not have ever gone to the emergency room. You know what that means, right? I know. I have to be a little bit more graphic. The dribble and get him.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, he pisses pants.

[Walt Flanagan]

Well, just leaking a little bit of leakage.

[Brian Quinn]

So this is leaking just like as you're sitting there or after going to the bathroom.

[Bryan Johnson]

This would be getting up and on.

[Brian Quinn]

The way to the bathroom, standing up.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. And when you told the nurses this, was it in a medical. Like, you're listing your symptoms or did you just. Or is the idea that you just.

[Walt Flanagan]

This was small talk.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Because you would have had to tell them as part of the medical student. So we know this one's true because you would have had to tell them.

[Brian Quinn]

Unless that's not the reason he went. The reason that he went was because of the symptoms that he showed, and the reason he went was because of that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay, so I was confused. I thought the stories. No, no, the story can Be fake as well as whether he told.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, the only. I think the only thing that is fake about this is did he actually use this as a topic of conversation while the pretty nurses came in?

[Brian Quinn]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

So it's. If not for his dribbling wee wee and passing gas, he might not have ever gone to the emergency room.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

That's not something you want to volunteer.

[Brian Quinn]

Gather round. Gather round, ladies.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, listen to this.

[Brian Quinn]

That's the reason I went to the hospital.

[Walt Flanagan]

Number 6 asked if there are any limitations on the amount of peanut butter chicken he can consume the next time he goes to the china buffet. Because he's not going until he could, quote, unquote, go ham.

[Brian Quinn]

I guess my first question is going ham. What does that mean exactly?

[Bryan Johnson]

Like going all out hard as a motherfucker. Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Oh, hard as a motherfucker. I never heard that before.

[Walt Flanagan]

He's a gentleman, though. He didn't use. He went. He used the word ham. The.

[Brian Quinn]

To the ladies.

[Walt Flanagan]

To the ladies.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

I'm sure would be like, what does that mean?

[Bryan Johnson]

Oh, you don't know?

[Walt Flanagan]

When's the last time you did anything, ham?

[Bryan Johnson]

Last time I went to the buffet.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I just met the cutest patient.

[Bryan Johnson]

He told me he.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Fell in love with one of my patients.

[Bryan Johnson]

I believe they call that the Nightingale syndrome.

[Walt Flanagan]

Any questions for the man about going ham?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

What was your answer?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yes, I'm on no dietary restrictions.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You. You can go ham.

[Walt Flanagan]

They didn't advise against it.

[Bryan Johnson]

No.

[Walt Flanagan]

Really? You're just getting out. You want to pop a staple from eating too much peanut butter chicken?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, he's like, I pinned down since I've been here. I got to get back to the buffet.

[Bryan Johnson]

I've been encouraged to get as much protein as I can.

[Walt Flanagan]

Peanut butter chicken's high in protein.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, it's chicken. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay.

[Bryan Johnson]

Consuming this as well.

[Walt Flanagan]

The peanut butter doesn't negate the protein. Just like make it like a non.

[Brian Quinn]

Like peanut butter's protein in it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, it's a double dose of protein.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

You should be on all peanut butter chicken diet then.

[Bryan Johnson]

I wish.

[Walt Flanagan]

And peanut butter flavored fluids too.

[Brian Quinn]

I mean, this is a good liquefied peanut butter.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I see him saying all of these things.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, number seven, did he talk to his nurses about how hard he pwned his mailbox headed friend Tom for assuming he had diabetes?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I think this might be a slam dunk.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I agree, because it puts him in a positive light.

[Brian Quinn]

And I've also heard him refer to Tom as mailbox head for some reason. Where does that come from? Chuck is also Mailbox head.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

And Lindsay, why is that?

[Bryan Johnson]

Because they all thought I had diabetes.

[Brian Quinn]

But what's a mailbox head? I never heard that term.

[Bryan Johnson]

It's from a C lab.

[Brian Quinn]

Okay.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, I just like the term.

[Walt Flanagan]

Now, if you are in a position where you're. You're laid up and you have six or seven young nurses just cater, not catering, but caring for you.

[Brian Quinn]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

Are any of these topics, any go to's or anything that you guys would have went with if you.

[Brian Quinn]

I don't bring up one of them?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Nope.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, not a one of them, John. No.

[Bryan Johnson]

No.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

The only one so far that I could even see being possible is the cane story. Because at least it's relating to treatment and not embarrassing.

[Walt Flanagan]

And what is a 20 something year old. What is the like why are you telling me about that? You gave your dad a cane and.

[Brian Quinn]

Now you have or even show the mildest interest in his cane. Like she sees canes all fucking day. Suddenly this cane stands out.

[Walt Flanagan]

Green ones, red ones. I don't think the color is going to be something that she's gonna even notice.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

She's gonna be looking, right?

[Walt Flanagan]

Go ahead.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

It's not a Corvette. Ghetto.

[Bryan Johnson]

Oh, this is the Corvette of canes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

When you referred to Tom as a male box head, what did the nurse say?

[Walt Flanagan]

She giggled.

[Brian Quinn]

Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

I was there when you did it.

[Bryan Johnson]

She just kind of like. Just like.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Like Japanese school girls.

[Brian Quinn]

Cute.

[Walt Flanagan]

Last 20 something year olds, dude.

[Brian Quinn]

Like.

[Walt Flanagan]

Oh, she just.

[Bryan Johnson]

She just kind of nodded her head just.

[Brian Quinn]

So green. You said.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Fanning her face.

[Walt Flanagan]

Is it about time for you to go Ham.

[Brian Quinn]

To lay down in the bed next to him? She was overtaken.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This is no pussy dead end.

[Bryan Johnson]

You had me at going ham.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You didn't have to explain what a mailbox head was to the nurses.

[Brian Quinn]

No, she didn't ask. She was not as interested as I was.

[Walt Flanagan]

Any questions about mailbox heads? Okay, number eight. Only eight and nine left. With the yarn lady having moved out of Airport Plaza, the thermostat is no longer controlled by a hamster any longer.

[Brian Quinn]

Hamster, scooter. Scooter, yeah, the guinea pig.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's why the plate. That's why the temperature was so hot in here. Because her hamster needed. Oh, he would die if it wasn't at 90. Right. And ours was at like a, you know, a balmy 110, I think at times.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

When would you, when would you have told them this story?

[Bryan Johnson]

When I had found out, like I was getting updates and I was checking Facebook. She announced the. Because Walt told me about the closing sale that she was having out in the hallway here. And then I went and checked Facebook and she announced that that was going to be the end of the. More yarn.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

How'd that come up with the nurses?

[Bryan Johnson]

Just in conversation. Because, like, they would come in, they're like, oh, it's really chilly in here.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

Because I had had the. Because the first thing I did when I got in there is had the thermostat turned down to cold.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

And I had made sure I was by there because it was. I kept me cool. I don't like.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So they were like, it's chilly in here. And you're like.

[Brian Quinn]

You're like, yeah, that's because I'm not a guinea pig. Yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, I told them that. I told them that I liked it cold. And like I said, we have this problem at the office because we have a person in the office in a space next door to us who has a guinea pig. And because of that, we have to keep the temperature really high. And because she keeps her door open, I can't sneak over there and turn the thermostat down. I have to wait till she walks by and goes to the bathroom.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I see it. I see it. Marry me.

[Walt Flanagan]

Which one?

[Brian Quinn]

Don't you see? I know everybody. Every single one of them could be real.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Honestly, just. Just the first one.

[Walt Flanagan]

What was the first one again?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

With the Chinese spices. I hope he's not that dumb.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. And the final gift of gab. Get him, Steve Dave's. Get him. Get him, Steve. Dave's gift of gab is how he plans on turning his X rays of his neck into his next year's Christmas card. Card. You do know he loves to create his own Christmas card. I know it was Christmas while he was in there getting close to the season.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. You didn't make a card this year, did you?

[Walt Flanagan]

Nurse. Nurse. Can I get your address? Next year I want to send you a. A Christmas card of my spinal cord.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, give me your phone number, too, just in case you. How did she react?

[Bryan Johnson]

Not Tee hee.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. It's going around the hospital. If you just say tee hee and walk out, he'll be fine.

[Bryan Johnson]

Rsv, the flu, the tes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

This story aside, do you think you'll do that? That's actually a pretty fun idea.

[Bryan Johnson]

You think you're going to do that? Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Any questions? John.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

What prompted you to talk about the Christmas card?

[Bryan Johnson]

Because I was finding out how I could get more high res versions of the scans because the MyChart app gives you like a basic. Like a Very low resolution when I tried to print them and like it was. Gave me the warning that it was low resolution. So I was trying to get an imaging copy. I'm not sure.

[Brian Quinn]

Seems like the person asked for that.

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, I was, I was finding out who to. Who do I reach out to? Who do I email to do this? Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Still. How the fuck would I know?

[Bryan Johnson]

Well, they can ask and they did. They did, yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

And you're like, well, I'm gonna make a Christmas card. And she was like, oh, Tee.

[Bryan Johnson]

You'Re so clever.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Highly trained medical professionals, you're so quirky.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

What is your motivation, for example, for. Is your motivation literally I just want high res pictures or are you trying to show them that you're like creative and funny?

[Bryan Johnson]

I just wanted high res. I wanted high res versions of the scans that I believe that you're not. That aren't as much.

[Walt Flanagan]

He's not a roundabout guy. He's just like. Yeah, it's very straightforward.

[Bryan Johnson]

I'm not sure if you remember the pictures in the group chat of me getting my imaging cd.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I do, yeah.

[Bryan Johnson]

I do, yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, Johnny, how do you feel? You've been invited to a very exclusive club with that group chat between Chuck, Tom, Brad Rupp, Jimmy.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

It's Jimmy Constant Entertainment. Yeah, it's constant.

[Walt Flanagan]

I hear there's. I hear there's days go on end that you don't even answer any of the texts though.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's true.

[Walt Flanagan]

You gotta stop doing that because you might get. You might get.

[Brian Quinn]

I might get bumped.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

I might get bumped, yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Brian, any questions before you weigh in on what you think the three real conversations were?

[Brian Quinn]

I don't think so. I think I got it down. I mean, if I get any of them right, it's 100% luck because these could all be, aside from, like Q said, the number one Chinese spice one, which I expect you would know. I would not be surprised at any of these if you brought them up.

[Walt Flanagan]

Q. Any last.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, I haven't locked in. Honestly, all my focus is still on the first one, the Chinese food. Because I was so frustrated in a way that he could only get due to me.

[Bryan Johnson]

Me.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So it might be true.

[Walt Flanagan]

Can I pull the curtain back and be real for a second, please? I would never assume that Chinese food created in America is not the same food I would be eating in China.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, but you're not a genius.

[Walt Flanagan]

True, but I would think that's not legal then to call it Chinese food. If it's not Chinese food, then like, that's false advertising.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Then Right, well, yeah, maybe.

[Walt Flanagan]

So what makes it American food because it's prepared on American soil?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, no, it's just the actual dishes are, like.

[Walt Flanagan]

The ingredients are different.

[Brian Quinn]

I think. I think they're, like, almost watered down for American palates. Right?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, it's like a totally different ballgame. Like, Italians are like, look, here's our sauce. Eat it. Chinese are like, you're not going to eat an eel fucking intestine. So we gotta make noodles. Right.

[Walt Flanagan]

But if you want peanut butter.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Something like that.

[Walt Flanagan]

But if you want peanut butter chicken in China, doesn't it t taste exactly the same as peanut butter chicken in America?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I don't even. I. My theory is they don't even have peanut butter chicken in China.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I didn't see it.

[Walt Flanagan]

Do you subscribe to that? Get them. They don't offer peanut butter chicken in.

[Bryan Johnson]

China because I think peanut butter sauce is, like, common in Thailand and places like that, so I could.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So not China.

[Bryan Johnson]

It spills over, though. It's. It's.

[Brian Quinn]

Sure.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. All right.

[Walt Flanagan]

It dribbles over. Yeah, Much like your little. Get them.

[Bryan Johnson]

Much like Mexican's known for its tacos.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I could be completely, completely wrong.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. I. I don't know. Yeah, I would never have assumed that what I was eating, like, so my. The pizza that I have doesn't taste like pizza in Italy. You know what happened in America? No.

[Brian Quinn]

I mean, the water's different with the crust and everything.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay. You learned something new.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. All right.

[Brian Quinn]

Or Reddit will be like, kill you.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I'll never know.

[Brian Quinn]

Peanut butter chicken's the national scream into the void.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

People scream into the void.

[Walt Flanagan]

Johnny, any last questions about any of the nine stories?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

No, I think I'm locked in. I think I've got what I.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay, so I'm gonna go with Bry first. Okay, I'm gonna go. I need your pen, though, Bri. Or a key pen, if you guys are done. All right, so, Bry, which numbers. Which stories do you think are true?

[Brian Quinn]

The stories I had for true were 3, 5, and 7.

[Walt Flanagan]

3, 5, and 7. Three being. Having. Wanting the black cane, wanting a green cane. The high stress dilemma that came with that and how he eventually came upon a solution by giving the black cane to his father.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, I think that's something that's easy to talk about. Maybe she showed some interest in the cane. It's an unusually colored cane.

[Walt Flanagan]

Out of all the stories that we talked about for this segment, easily I have heard the Cain story told and recounted at least 10 times. 10 times at a Minimum.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I remember that.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. And the other one you said was five. Five was the dribbling and the farting. He might not have never gone to the emergency room if not for those two. So we'll say farts and dribbles. And seven, how hard he pwned his mailbox headed friend mailbox. All right, Q.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. I have the real stories that I have.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yes.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I have two. The podcast game. I believe he would have. He'd be proud of that and want to present himself in a positive light.

[Walt Flanagan]

Would he mention how it went over like an absolute lead balloon?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

No, but that wasn't part of the story that I was getting. Like, if he said it like it went like he killed at a podcast game, that would be a lie. Well, he might tell that anyway. But if he's talking about. If he's talking about me, which we know he did, his connection to me. Besides, now we're friends. But, like, was a podcast, and that's the end to that. Now not only am I on a podcast, but also I'm a creator on the podcast.

[Walt Flanagan]

I'm creating content for this clown on tv.

[Brian Quinn]

Exactly.

[Walt Flanagan]

Like this guy needs me.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Might as well put my hand up his ass. Yes, yes, I believe that. I believe is very possible.

[Brian Quinn]

All right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I had to say that 3. The cane story was true because I heard it twice.

[Walt Flanagan]

Lucky you. You want to hear eight more?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah. And then I went with six. I believe the peanut chicken. I believe that would be on the top of his mind. When can I go ham on peanut chicken?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Six.

[Walt Flanagan]

Ham.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Okay. Johnny, you ever heard that?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Hard as a mother. Oh, I love it. I use it.

[Brian Quinn]

So.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I'm thinking that the Kane story might be a red herring here since we've heard so much about this Cain situation.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's a clever move.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I think it might be one Chinese food. Chinese problems.

[Bryan Johnson]

It's the episode title.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, definitely.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I think. I think Q is dead on with the second one, you know?

[Walt Flanagan]

Really?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

This is. How can I tell you that I know Q? So I think number two, the podcast game. And then I. I think the last one's a slam dunk. I think. No diabetes. Mailbox head number seven.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Wow. Now, Johnny Law does have a. A leg over a set. He's that group, Brian.

[Brian Quinn]

Like, I can.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I can tell you, Q. Yeah. Almost every single one of these has been brought up within that group chat. So I am at the same disadvantage.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

We never got to the bottom of the titanium fork. We still don't know where it is.

[Bryan Johnson]

It's gone.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Yeah, it's gone as far as we know.

[Bryan Johnson]

RUP replaced it, though.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

You should get copper silverware, because isn't that the. That kills germs and stuff? Isn't copper like antiseptic?

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah, but I have a thing for titanium.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I see.

[Bryan Johnson]

So come on. Titanium ring.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I just figured if you're just gonna eat on it, then leave it on our table for a week. You might want the thing that kills. But no titanium.

[Bryan Johnson]

My vertebrae is titanium.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Of course.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, so the refresh. Bry says canes. He says the. The farting and dribbling. And mailbox Q has the podcast, the cane and ham. Johnny, number one Chinese food, Chinese problems. The podcast and mailbox head. Correct.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

Lock it in.

[Walt Flanagan]

Whoever gets the most, we'll get to.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Hear the DC Box.

[Walt Flanagan]

No, I thought whoever. Well, I mean, I don't know. Johnny's already in, but I thought you could get an invite to the. To the text chat.

[Bryan Johnson]

The group.

[Walt Flanagan]

The yenta group.

[Brian Quinn]

I don't think they want us. No, they don't want.

[Walt Flanagan]

They want to be able to talk bad about me. That's what they want to do.

[Brian Quinn]

Slave driving.

[Bryan Johnson]

That's Jimmy about Chuck.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, reveal number. Reveal the first story that was true. Get him.

[Bryan Johnson]

Okay. It was Get Him Tration.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

The game.

[Walt Flanagan]

The game.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yes.

[Brian Quinn]

Did you get it?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay, I got that one. Yes.

[Bryan Johnson]

But what actually happened was I had shown them a video of Game Night to show how I was in June being able to dance around and everything. And the nurse was like, oh, wow. I really love old, classic 70s game shows. Like, Classic Concentration. And I was like, well, I actually created a game for a.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Wait, what were you wearing in that when you were dancing around?

[Bryan Johnson]

The brown suit.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. Not the green screen.

[Bryan Johnson]

And I said, I created a game called Get Him Tracion, which was just like, with the.

[Walt Flanagan]

With the.

[Bryan Johnson]

You know, revealing the pieces and solving the puzzle. I said, but it did not go over as well as.

[Walt Flanagan]

So he did. He did cop to the fact that it didn't go over well.

[Bryan Johnson]

And then I brought up Alex Trebek's subtle racism in. Because whenever he would say Suzuki Sidekick, he put on, like, a Japanese accent. So. And the nurse said that next time she watched, she would pay attention for that.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay, now, this was the.

[Walt Flanagan]

One of the young hotties cares about concentration.

[Bryan Johnson]

She says she likes classic 70s shows.

[Walt Flanagan]

Wow, that's unusual.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Some bedside manner.

[Brian Quinn]

I would not think that.

[Walt Flanagan]

So who got a point for that? BQ gets a point.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I'm the only one.

[Walt Flanagan]

No. And Johnny Law also gets a point. Brian.

[Brian Quinn]

No points.

[Walt Flanagan]

No points yet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

So the Chinese food one was fake?

[Walt Flanagan]

No, we don't know yet.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

The first one, well, he skipped it. He went to two, said the first real one is.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah, yeah, it was fake.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay. Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

The Chinese.

[Bryan Johnson]

I did speculate that it was the buffet as well as knowing Ming.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Bryan Johnson]

So.

[Walt Flanagan]

Unless you slept with them.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, really, I don't know how you.

[Walt Flanagan]

Could have thought that it would change your DNA.

[Brian Quinn]

Did you to the hospital over Christmas?

[Walt Flanagan]

Both you guys are. Both you guys. Guys are going ham on each other and wound up in a hospital.

[Bryan Johnson]

So either I got it from Ming or all at the buffet.

[Walt Flanagan]

I want to give a shout out to Tom since I'm not privy to all these insights since I'm not involved in the group chat. I was like, hey, Tom, I'm coming up with this game. I said, give me some of the inane things that Gidem has spoken about in the last couple of weeks that I could use for this game. And he just went off his text list and he just rattled him off.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Okay.

[Walt Flanagan]

That's why. That's why it was so hard to decipher.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Gotcha, Gotcha. All right, great.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right, get him. Reveal the real conversation starter.

[Bryan Johnson]

The second one about how I accidentally ordered a black cane, but.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

He's gonna let that go to waste. He's trying to a nurse here.

[Brian Quinn]

I can't help but notice your cane, old man.

[Bryan Johnson]

But again, this. This was prompted by bringing up how interesting. How interesting the color was. Yes, yes, and yes. And how unusual it was.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

It's very interesting. Green.

[Brian Quinn]

Yes. Yeah, it's green.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

She must get wet over Kermit.

[Bryan Johnson]

Unfortunately.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Certainly I'm two for two. I'm starting to worry about myself.

[Walt Flanagan]

Dude, bq, you got another one.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I spent too much time thinking about. Get him.

[Walt Flanagan]

Bry's got one.

[Brian Quinn]

I'm on the board.

[Walt Flanagan]

Johnny Loyd. No points in round two.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Oh, it's rough.

[Walt Flanagan]

How come you didn't think the Kane story, John?

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

I just thought it was told too many times.

[Walt Flanagan]

A story that good can never be told that many times.

[Bryan Johnson]

That's.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Supposed to be a lawyer, Johnny.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

It's just like I would stay so far away from that talking to a cute nurse. You know what I mean?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

That's why you have a wife and a child.

[Bryan Johnson]

But it shows how compassionate I am giving a cane to my father that I was just going to illegally return to Amazon.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, boy.

[Brian Quinn]

All right, if I go three for.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Three, I'm killing myself. I'm going to tell you right now.

[Brian Quinn]

That would be astounding.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Hang myself.

[Brian Quinn]

Amazing.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Please don't be the peanut. Peanut, chicken.

[Bryan Johnson]

And the last one was how hard I pwn mailbox head to.

[Brian Quinn]

All right, what number was that?

[Walt Flanagan]

That was number seven. And that means it is an absolute dead tie.

[Brian Quinn]

Wow.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. Everybody has two points.

[Bryan Johnson]

A triple dead heat. Wow.

[Walt Flanagan]

Is there a story, something they can guess to try to break the tie? A little tiebreaker here you could come up with on the fly?

[Bryan Johnson]

No, no.

[Brian Quinn]

Can I tell the cane story again?

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. Well, I guess so.

[Bryan Johnson]

This came up in, like, you know, they asked me, like, what did people speculate it was? And so I said someone speculated that it was diabetes and that it was neuropathy.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And you used the word mailbox.

[Bryan Johnson]

Mailbox head. Yes. And then I also managed to disparage Tom's MRI plate as well.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Wow. Tom's your friend.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

But you've componed somebody. Friend or foe?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Oh, I'm with you.

[Walt Flanagan]

You got a pwn.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

And hey, I believe mailbox head is. Look, I like how he said foam face. Like anything could be an insult. Mailbox head works for me. I get it. I get it.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right. Wow.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Guys, I'm proud of us.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

You guys know your friend, man. You guys know him better than you think you did.

[Bryan Johnson]

Yeah.

[Brian Quinn]

So all of us are in on the group chat now.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

I'll pass. I'm gonna pass on that.

[Walt Flanagan]

You can give a Johnny thank you for give. Spending some time with us and answering those legal questions. Those pesky legal questions. Anytime you get something good, the law always wants to stick their nose in it, trying to take it away.

[Brian Quinn]

You got it.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Happy to be here.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Is this a billable hour?

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah, I'll.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

And I'll see you guys at Q West. I'm looking forward to it.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

All right, buddy. We're gonna have a blast, pal.

[Brian Quinn]

See you soon, bud.

[Walt Flanagan]

Bye, John.

[Johnny Law (Attorney)]

Bye, now. Bye.

[Walt Flanagan]

All right.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Nice. Wow. Always good.

[Walt Flanagan]

Yeah. It's nice to. To hear from John.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, that's it. What an episode.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yes.

[Walt Flanagan]

Packed to the gills, starting off 20, 26 strong.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Here we go.

[Brian Quinn]

We already missed an episode.

[Walt Flanagan]

I don't think that means that we're not coming out strong. I'd rather come out with two strong episodes than come out with, like, you know, just to shit one out. Just for. To shit for shit's sake, you know?

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Yeah, I agree.

[Brian Quinn]

Yeah.

[Walt Flanagan]

Quality. Quality over.

[Q (Brian Quinn)]

Thank you, West. I agree.

[Walt Flanagan]

Tell him, Steve. Dave.