Re-Release: Wayne Brady

Summary

Thanks Dad with Ego Nwodim – “Re-Release: Wayne Brady” (December 30, 2025)

Episode Overview

In this heartfelt and humorous episode of Thanks Dad, host Ego Nwodim welcomes the multitalented Wayne Brady as her “dad for the day.” Together they discuss complex family histories, growing up with single parents, the nuances of fatherhood, generational stereotypes, mental health, emotional inheritance, and the challenge of both recognizing and celebrating one’s own achievements. The episode centers on candid conversations about father figures, the power of owning one’s accomplishments, the impact of parental absence, and how Wayne approaches parenting his own children—with a blend of vulnerability, honesty, and the wit audiences expect from both stars.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Walking in Your Shine – Owning Achievements

[04:27–07:22]

• Wayne clarifies that he—not the show—won the Emmys, highlighting the importance of correctly acknowledging individual achievements.
• Ego and Wayne discuss the “dance” of not appearing arrogant as Black professionals, despite hard-won success.
  • Wayne:
    "I can do this shit. So bam. So that's my lesson, daughter. Walk in your shine because you kill it. You are amazing, and the world needs to know that you're amazing. And that is not a problem." (07:10)
• They both reflect on their upbringing—Ego by a single mom, Wayne by his grandmother with his father as a "satellite" in his life—and the immigrant mentality to "not make yourself small."

2. Father Absence & Generational Narratives

[09:15–16:50]

• Wayne reflects on the stereotype of absentee Black fathers, emphasizing that familial circumstances are more nuanced.
• His father was a distant, larger-than-life figure who chose to provide for Wayne’s grandmother rather than be directly present.
  • Wayne:
    "When I became a man and I was seeking that relationship…I sat down and was able to have a face to face talk, that I wasn't scared…he accepted me as a man." (12:40)
• Wayne recounts the missed opportunity for a deeper relationship, as his father passed away shortly after they reconnected.
• Ego relates, sharing the sense of mystery and inherited traits from absent fathers.

3. Generational Inheritance—The Good and the Challenging

[15:32–19:11]

• Wayne discusses both positive (provider, protector) and more difficult traits (impatience, temper) he believes he inherited from his father.
  • Wayne:
    "If that dude did anything, he took care of his mother…he made sure that no matter where he was in the world…she would always be independent." (15:54)
• Ego and Wayne riff on the possibility that frustrations with people's slowness could be a sign of high IQ.
  • Wayne:
    "Own that you are kind and generous…sometimes you've got to be your own hype man." (18:23)

4. Navigating Family Systems and Childhood Normalcy

[22:39–24:30]

• Wayne never resented his father for providing indirectly, as his grandmother's love was his only known reality.
• He and Ego note how adults try to project a sense of “lack” on children from nontraditional families, even when the kids feel loved and whole.

5. The Role of Community and Mentorship

[26:09–30:34]

• Wayne realizes what he really missed from not having his father around only later in life—especially when he lacked a male guide for rites of passage (shaving, tying a tie).
  • Wayne:
    "A Black man stepped into that father figure role and showed me how to shave…" (28:38)
• He credits different community members with filling these gaps over time, reinforcing that "finding your tribe" matters.

6. Wayne’s Parenting Philosophy

[31:20–40:00]

• Brady is committed to teaching his own son “the rituals”—from relationships and manhood to life skills—he didn’t receive as a child.
  • Wayne:
    "Those pieces of ritual...are important…let me teach you how to tie this tie…let me show you how to shave…let me talk to you about relationships and women and manhood…" (31:20)
• He shares the importance of honoring his grandmother by naming his son after her and discusses not feeling pressured as a “junior,” but being compared to his father growing up.

7. Generational Discipline Styles and Emotional Openness

[40:00–47:25]

• Wayne candidly admits being a strict dad, shaped by the “don’t talk back” discipline of his own youth, but recognizes the limitations of that approach.
• Family therapy became an essential part of the Brady household, helping break generational cycles of judgment and silence.
  • Wayne:
    "Even parenting...you're parenting through a filter...of don't talk back…We've had talks about that…the whole family goes to therapy." (40:49)
• His openness about depression highlights the need to address mental health in families of color.
  • Wayne:
    "It was either go to therapy or be very unwell…My ex wife…made me go to therapy. She’s like, you need therapy." (44:27)
• He suspects clinical depression and ADD/ADHD run in the family.

8. Modeling vs. Imposing—Parenting Young Adults

[53:32–63:12]

• Wayne reflects on the challenge of being a strict parent while wanting to maintain an open, best-friend-style relationship with his now adult daughter.
  • Wayne:
    "Her best friend is the person that has her best interest even when she doesn't wanna hear it." (52:09)
  • “I had to earn [her trust] because…I was constantly coming at her.” (53:32)
• He acknowledges that at times, parents should model healthy relationships rather than impose advice.
• They joke about the pressure—and sometimes impossibility—of “getting parenting exactly right.”

9. Dad-Vice: On Buying Property

[63:12–67:53]

• Ego asks for “dad advice” on whether to invest in property.
  • Wayne:
    "If you are in a space to be able to do it and it's not going to take away from your living capital…I think you should invest in property...Don’t spend more than you have. Don’t overextend yourself…Location, location, location." (64:23)
• Wayne shares his own real estate experience: starting with commercial properties, now looking at rental homes, and the need to plan for the future.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On owning your narrative:
  "Walk in your shine because you kill it. You are amazing, and the world needs to know that you're amazing. And that is not a problem."
  — Wayne Brady (07:10)
• On stereotypes and parental absence:
  "This is not to perpetuate what I think is one of the most insidious and overtly horrible stereotypes about black men... It’s not that I didn’t have a relationship with him because he was that."
  — Wayne Brady (09:17)
• On father-son rites of passage:
  "A Black man stepped into that father figure role and showed me how to shave…"
  — Wayne Brady (28:38)
• On generational discipline:
  "I come from the generation of don't talk back to me…you don't talk back to me so much to the point that I have a sensation in my jaw…As an actor, if I ever need to summon frustration, I remember what my jaw feels like being locked because I can't speak."
  — Wayne Brady (41:56)
• On depression and therapy:
  "It was either go to therapy or be very unwell…My ex wife…made me go to therapy. She’s like, you need therapy. Therapy's for white people [I thought]."
  — Wayne Brady (44:27)
• On being a best friend parent:
  "Her best friend is the person that has her best interest even when she doesn't wanna hear it."
  — Wayne Brady (52:09)
• On advice and learning boundaries as a parent:
  “Even now I've gotta be respectful of what I say to her as an adult, even though she’s my daughter.”
  — Wayne Brady (58:10)
• On real estate ‘dad-vice’:
  "If you are in a space to be able to do it and it's not going to take away from your living capital…I think you should invest in property...Don’t spend more than you have. Don’t overextend yourself…Location, location, location."
  — Wayne Brady (64:23)

---

Key Timestamps

• 03:05–04:54 – Ego’s introduction and Wayne’s playful Emmy correction
• 05:19–07:22 – Wayne’s advice: “Walk in your shine”
• 09:15–16:50 – Wayne on his absent father; breaking the absentee Black dad stereotype
• 26:09–30:34 – Learning male rites of passage from community members
• 31:20–36:47 – Wayne’s approach to teaching his son; reflections on being a “junior”
• 40:49–47:25 – Wayne on strict parenting, emotional repression, and the turn to family therapy
• 47:53–49:45 – Mental health inheritance and parental modeling
• 52:09–58:15 – Navigating judgment vs. support with adult children
• 63:12–67:53 – Wayne's “dad-vice” on real estate investing

---

Tone & Mood

The episode is warm, candid, deeply personal, and laced with humor. Wayne is open about both his achievements and his struggles, and Ego fosters vulnerability while exchanging witty banter and honest storytelling. Both speakers maintain a conversational, relaxed style that is equally compassionate and enlightening for listeners.

---

Summary

This conversation transcends traditional “dad advice,” offering an intimate look at the complexity of fatherhood, the influence of generational cycles, and the power of self-acceptance. Wayne Brady’s journey—from a childhood shaped by absence and comparison, through public success and private struggle, to deeply intentional parenting—serves as both encouragement and blueprint for owning your narrative, healing family patterns, and investing in both emotional and financial futures.

Transcript

[Ao Wodom]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Guaranteed Human.

[Wayne Brady]

So you're telling me that the AI that's meant to make everyone's job easier to manage just adds more to manage on top of the thousands of apps the IT department already manages? Funny how that works. Any business can add AI. IBM helps you scale and manage AI to change how you do business. Let's create Smile to Business. IBM.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10? Upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop, voted PCMag's Reader's Choice top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere and Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit LGUSA.com iHeart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11 PC Mag Reader's Choice Used with permission. All rights reserved.

Season two of Unrivaled Basketball is here and the talent is unreal. Paige Beckers, Nafiza Collier, Kelsey Plumb, Brianna Stewart and more are back to redefine the game. Unrivaled basketball Season 2, sponsored by Samsung Galaxy tips off January 5th on TNT, TruTV and HBO Max.

Support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On public, you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like EFTs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com, and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors llc SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not investment recommendation or advice. Complete Disclosures available at public.comDisclosures your ticket.

[Wayne Brady]

To big savings is that big blue envelope in your mailbox Valpak. It's printing with deals from big name brands and your favorite local spots, dining services, stuff you're already buying, all for less and you could score $100 or other instant prizes just for opening it. Or save even faster with mobile coupons you can use right [e-mail] Valpack there's definitely something in it for you.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay, My guest dad for the day is moistured up and down. And I'm so happy because we both did the same thing before we started recording, which means we really just might be kin. Hi, guys. I'm Ao Wodom, and welcome to. Thanks, Dad. I was raised by a single mom. I do not have a relationship with my dad. And I'm not going to have a relationship with him because, oh, my gosh, he went and died. So.

[Wayne Brady]

Oh, my Lord. Oh, my Lord.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh, my Lord. It's okay, Wayne. It's okay. Don't be worried for me. You look nervous now.

[Wayne Brady]

Like, oh, no, that's what I've stepped into.

[Ao Wodom]

No, when I tell you it's fine. So on this podcast, I'm sitting down with father figures who are old enough to be my dad or just dads themselves. We will never say which category our guests are in. And I'm going to get to ask the questions I've always wanted to ask a dad. Like, how do I know if the guy I'm dating is right for me? Or what should I look out for when I'm buying a car? Or is it actually a wise investment to buy a house? Is it really? People always say that. But anyway, before we get into that, the hard stuff, you know my next guest from the Emmy winning television series Whose Line Is It Anyway? The Wayne Brady show and his newest reality series, Wayne Brady the Family Remix. Please welcome my dad for the day. You guessed it because I said it already. Wayne Brady. Hi.

[Wayne Brady]

Hey. Two. Two things.

[Ao Wodom]

Yes.

[Wayne Brady]

The show didn't win the Emmys. I won all the Emmys and the show didn't win. That was me. Just to clarify.

[Ao Wodom]

I am so glad you're clarifying. And I'm about to throw someone under a big old bus because I didn't write that intro.

[Wayne Brady]

But you know what?

[Ao Wodom]

I love that you have clarified because there is a difference and people outside the industry especially don't seem to know that. But you won the Emmy and that's a huge deal.

[Wayne Brady]

So, yeah, it's a big deal. And especially because I'm your dad for the day. You know, the thing that I've taught my daughter that I will pass on to you as my daughter for the day, which is always weird when a beautiful woman calls you dad and then you're like, oh, which category I fit in old enough to be your dad or dad dad advice. As long as it's not daddy, then I guess it changes the conversation.

[Ao Wodom]

Yes. Daddy could get weird.

[Wayne Brady]

But, yeah. The thing I'll tell you is, for a lot of my life, and I think that a lot of black people end up doing this, is we work to be successful. Depending on the environment where you're from. You were raised by a single mother. I was raised by my grandmother. Okay. After my grandfather passed away, and my father was. Was a distant satellite, so I was raised by her. So basically a single mom. And my folks are from the US Virgin Islands, so I have the island hustle and mentality of the immigrants. You struggle, you work, you want to be the best. You want to be the best. You kick ass at things, but then you can't always sound too proud of those things because then somebody's like, you arrogant or you this, you that? So I spent a lot of my life and a lot of my career when someone would say, oh, you're really good at this, I would downplay everything and I would make myself small.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

So I reached a point where I went, you know what? If I truly did win this accolade and if I actually can do. If I actually can sing, dance, act, write, produce, do this shit, and that's my skill set, and I do it well. It's not arrogant for me in certain spaces to own that because there are other people who have done far less and have bigger mouths and they eat off of that. Absolutely. And I'm over here trying to be polite to make the people in the room comfortable because they. Because I don't want a rah rah. Well, that's why anytime that my publicist, I do a show, you better make sure that my introduction is five time Emmy winning, two time Grammy nominee, let's go, Broadway star, blah, blah, blah, women. Because those are things that I've done. I cannot save your life. I'm not a doctor. I can barely fix your car. I can't change a spare tire. I can't really cook.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

But I can do this shit. So bam. So that's my lesson, daughter. Walk in your shine because you kill it. You are amazing, and the world needs to know that you're amazing. And that is not a problem.

[Ao Wodom]

You are so kind and so generous, and I love that I am talking to you right now because speaking of not wanting to come across as arrogant, it's this interesting dance we do, and I. Sounds like you did for a long time, where you go oh, yeah. I don't want to come off as arrogant, and I don't want to sound haughty, but you really worked towards these things, and it's okay to be proud of them and it's okay to own them. And shrinking doesn't help anybody, really. And mind you, if people are uncomfortable because you're accomplished, my mom might say in that moment, the discomfort belongs to them.

[Wayne Brady]

Yeah.

[Ao Wodom]

There is nothing wrong with you celebrating your achievements. So I'm sincerely, from the depths of my heart, so grateful that you clarified, because you did, that you worked towards that, and no one handed any of that to you. So to say, hey, let's acknowledge these things. I don't have a problem with it. And I love that my dad has all those statues. So listen.

[Wayne Brady]

Well, thank you. That's a lesson that I had to teach my daughter, especially being a young black woman. It's like, no, you can be proud. And she's. She's so damn smart and talented, and I never. So at this age, she just turned 22. Yesterday, I was like, I will not allow you to make yourself smaller for your boss, for someone you work for, for anyone you work with, for any man that is in your life. Do not make yourself small.

[Ao Wodom]

That is wonderful, wonderful dad advice. And I'm just. I'm truly. I'm stopped in my tracks because I'm like, this is what a young woman needs to hear and have instilled in her from a very young age. And I feel very grateful that my mother did, I believe, a fantastic job raising her four children to be confident and believe they can do whatever it is they want to do. I think I am a testament to that, and I think my siblings are as well. You seem to have now found such clarity and confidence on your own here. Okay, but was there a point where you had any relationship with your dad at all?

[Wayne Brady]

No.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

No. And. And here is the tragedy I feel. And a lot of. And. And to anybody watching this is not to perpetuate what I think is one of the most insidious and overtly horrible stereotypes about black men in this country, about black men are fathers and they're absentee and they leave. And that it's not that I didn't have a relationship with him, because he was that. In fact, if anything, my father earlier, I was very specific to say that he was a satellite. My father was in the military. He was in the US Army. And when I think of my dad, I think of this black GI Joe type charact. Cause that's who he Was. He was larger than life. Like six two big, barrel chested dude, bespoke multiple languages. My dad was brilliant because of where he was and always being stationed someplace. He made the choice, he and my grandmother, so that I would have the island upbringing that he had that instilled certain values in him. The downside of that is I didn't have a relationship with him. And by the time that I became a man and I was seeking that relationship, I remember clearly. Oh, and this turns into my Oprah moment.

[Ao Wodom]

Please, please. I'm no Oprah, but please.

[Wayne Brady]

I. I started acting when I was 16. I was so proud of it. But even before then, I knew I wanted to perform. But you, you're folks in Nigeria.

[Ao Wodom]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Wayne Brady]

Okay, then we come from the same cloth, right? Where if you tell somebody from the islands, mama, I want to go on stage and I want to sing and dance a la nonsense. That jump up and down nonsense. What you gonna do? That. That was not in. In the plans for anyone, right? So even the relationship with my dad, the closest that I got at one point as a teenager is because dad was in the military and we couldn't talk. We had nothing in common. I felt he was so big and masculine and I was this little skinny twerpy kid that loved books and loved to draw and create and do voices. So the one thing that I could do that I could be like my dad is I joined the ROTC in my school, right? Because I was like, dad, look, I'm going in the ROTC and I'm in a uniform too. And maybe we can talk about things like that. And I can ask you about my gig line and my hat and all this stuff when really the theater kid in me was like, this wasn't a uniform, it's a costume.

[Ao Wodom]

Costume.

[Wayne Brady]

And I loved to march. I love doing drills because that was the closest that I got to dancing.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh, wow.

[Wayne Brady]

So that was way of being close to him. And then we had a big falling out when I graduated high school because I didn't want to go to college. I got these scholarships and they were pissed at me because I turned down these scholarships to schools. And I said, I want to act. And I went on tour. And finally, when I was 19, I booked my first big guest starring role on this show called in the Heat of the Night, this old drama, and it was a two parter and it was directed by Carol o', Connor, who your viewers are so young, nobody's going to remember all in the Family, but this big sitcom and Carol o' Connor was a huge actor at the time and he's the one that cast me. It was a big deal. I was in the paper back in Orlando. Folks are like, local actor on a big CBS show, blah, blah, blah. And we were shooting in Covington, Georgia, which is where my dad settled.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

And I got a chance. As I was shooting, I called up my dad, I said, dad, I would love to come and visit you. And, you know, so I drive out and I see him. And we sat down and we talked. And it was the first time in my life that I remembered that I sat down and I was able to have a face to face talk, that I wasn't scared, that I didn't think that the only time he talked to me was to discipline me. It was, it was, I could sit across from him man to man, and he accepted me as a man. And one of the first things he said when I sat down, he goes, junior, because that's Wayne Brady. Seen your Junior, I just saw that you're going to be on that show with Archie Bunker. I'm so proud of you. And he got on the phone and he's calling different guys from his unit and he's like, yeah, my boy's going to be on tv. And he was asking me what it was like, yeah, the process. And I said, oh, I'd love to have you come out to set at some point. And this is what I do. And he hugged me and it wasn't a very long visit. I remember that because I had to drive back and then I didn't see him again. And then I moved to Los Angeles and about a year and a half to two years later, he passed of a massive coronary. So to this day, I have a hole where I have so many unanswered questions. I don't know him. So there are pieces of myself and behaviors that I do that I don't know where they come from.

[Ao Wodom]

Right.

[Wayne Brady]

That it's kind of like I wish that, you know, I would have had my dad to be able to walk, walk, walk me through life.

[Ao Wodom]

Right, right. First of all, I'm so sorry about that. I mean, I'm right along for the ride and I go, I don't see it going that way. And I feel like oftentimes we feel like we have enough time or we'll have enough time for things to go differently or for relationships to shift with people. And then there are so many variables that are just outside of our control. And it just feel that, yeah, that feels tragic to me. But thank you for being so open in that regard. And to your point about, there's so many parts about you now that you go, I wonder if this is from him. A few years ago, I had read a friend's obituary about her father, and it may be more. Less of an obituary, more of a tribute on Instagram. It was really beautiful, and they had a pretty fraught relationship. And in the caption, I remember her saying, you know, no matter who your father is. And she might have been quoting someone, and I might be bastardizing this, but it was, no matter who your father is, he's part of you, and he's in the way you hold a cup or hold a pen. And I thought, that's so crazy, because I've never thought about my father in that regard, because I feel whole myself. But I go, surely there are parts of me that are a reflection of him, even if he wasn't this present in my life. And so that mystery that you have is one that I share with you. Are there parts of you that you feel inclined to think are from him, though?

[Wayne Brady]

Yeah. Yeah. And not always. Positive.

[Ao Wodom]

Sure.

[Wayne Brady]

To. To be completely honest, I feel that the positive things that I've gotten from him, especially as I got a little older, is I do feel that he was a provider and a protector, which is why I really do hate that fucking pardon. Pardon my French.

[Ao Wodom]

No, you're allowed to cuss this.

[Wayne Brady]

Pardon that. That. That stereotype that. That really lives with us with so many others, because if that dude did anything, he took care of his mother, who they had such an amazing relationship, which, thank God for my grandma, he took care of that woman. He made sure that no matter where he was in the world, even if she was married and she was married, he's like, ma, I'm going to take care of you. So you're married and you've got a husband and whatever that money is, but I'm always going to make sure that you have your own, because if you ever need to leave, you will always be independent. And I was like, oh, that is so deep that he loved his mother so much. So I am a provider and a protector and a nurturer. And I think that is a direct line from him. That is something that I got from. From the. From him.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

I don't know who. I get my. I. I've got a bit of a temper. I'm not, you know, like, I don't go around kicking indoors, but I definitely get frustrated very fast when people don't keep up with the things That I see in my head and. And I saw that in him even when I was a little kid, that. That your mind moves at such a pace that you get angry at the world. And I definitely know that I have that.

[Ao Wodom]

Do you know that someone said to me recently. Because I think I at times have a bit of frustration as well, where I go, oh, this thing seems so plain to me. And someone recently was saying to me that, you know, that might be a function of a high iq. And I was like, I don't think I have a high iq. And they're like, no, no, no. I'm dealing with this thing with my son in school, and, you know, his teacher, he gets frustrated very easily because what's simple to him is not simple to other people. And he's like, kind of keep up. And his teacher said it might be a high IQ thing. So, shoot, we might just have high IQs. I don't think that's what's going on with me, but it might. It could be.

[Wayne Brady]

What? What. What did I say? Own your stuff. Oh, my gosh, you should. How can you not do.

[Ao Wodom]

How.

[Wayne Brady]

How can you not like what. What I know of you and what I followed, and I've seen you in different interviews, the way you carry yourself, there's no way. There's no way walking. That you do not have a high iq. Which, by the way, for those of you watching, calm down. That you're like, well, a high IQ is. Is merely a measurement of potential. It. But, Jeff, the fact is you can. You have more going on than a lot of people, and I can recognize that. So own that you are kind and.

[Ao Wodom]

Generous and thank you. You know what? I will. I'm going to try to heed my dad for the day's advice throughout the rest of this conversation. I'm going to try my damnedest to do that.

[Wayne Brady]

And because people spend enough time trying to tear you down in life, even if you're on tv, especially if you got. Especially people spend enough time kicking you in the ass that you've got to be your own hype man. Sometimes that I forget that I've got to reset every single day.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah. So that is such sound advice. To be your own hype man. Because there are so many people who are ready to tear another down, by the way, has nothing to do with you, the person who is the target of those attacks. It has everything to do with the other person. But you're still a person, and you can feel that. And one thing you could do to counter that is to hype yourself up, okay?

[Wayne Brady]

Hallelujah.

[Ao Wodom]

I like how this sounds, and I want to really, really walk in it and live it.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10 upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop, voted PCMag's reader's choice top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere, and Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit lgusa.com iheart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11. PCMag reader's choice Used with permission. All rights reserved.

Season two of Unrivaled Basketball is here and the talent is unreal. The best women's players on the planet are running it back with even bigger moments and bigger stakes. Don't miss as Paige Beckers, Nafeeza Collier, Kelsey Plumb, Brianna Stewart and more take the court and redefine the game. This isn't your regular season. This is unrivaled, where the pace is faster, the energy is higher and every athlete shines. Unrivaled basketball season two, sponsored by Samsung Galaxy, tips off January 5 on TNT, TruTV and HBO Max support for the.

Show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On public, you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like EFTs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures [e-mail] disclosures it's the most.

Wonderful time of the year and Valpak.

[Ao Wodom]

Is here to make it even better.

[Sponsor Announcer]

This month as you sip through holiday mail, don't miss the blue Valpak envelope.

[Ao Wodom]

From dining to Holiday shopping.

[Sponsor Announcer]

There's a slate full of savings in your mailbox, plus a chance to instantly win $100. That's right, you can find $100 Christmas cash inside.

[Wayne Brady]

Want to save even more money on what you love?

[Sponsor Announcer]

Go to valpak.com for local coupons and offers. It pays to open Valpak. No purchase necessary for instant win. Voip prohibited prices are randomly inserted. See specially marked Valpak envelopes for details.

The world's best ski and snowboard athletes are chasing medals.

[Ao Wodom]

Now you can follow their every move.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Join Insider, the official US Ski and snowboard fan loyalty program, and get premium viewing at World cup ski events, exclusive athlete meetups, discounts from brands you love, and a custom welcome gift mailed direct to your doorstep this winter. Show your support as they race for the podium. Head to insider.usski and snowboard.org and join today.

[Ao Wodom]

You have parts of you that are your father that you acknowledge or you feel inclined to. To think are parts of your father. Did you ever feel conflicted, disappointed in the fact that your father was this principled man who said, I'm going to be a provider and a protector to my mother? That's important to me that she has that. But perhaps was not that for you?

[Wayne Brady]

No, I've never. Because I've never thought about my father in the negative light of. You weren't here for me. Because a. Like I said, he did take care of my grandmother and he set up a system. He set up a system. So, yeah, it would have been nice to spend more time with him, but I was raised from the time that I was three months old because I don't want to go into my whole backstory because that's in the book. Sure, sure.

[Ao Wodom]

Go get the book. Everyone get the book.

[Wayne Brady]

When I write it.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh, shoot.

[Wayne Brady]

That my grandmother and that system was all I ever knew. So I knew that my mother was in the world and I knew that my father was in the world, but my grandmother was my everything. And I knew that my father took care of my grandmother. So therefore, vis a vis, he was taking care of me.

[Ao Wodom]

Gotcha.

[Wayne Brady]

So I never really missed out on that. Like, I think for certain part of my life, I missed out on that. You know, hey, dad, play ball with me. Or I wish I could do, you know, then that would have been cool. But I. But I never resent him for that because he was taking care of. Of us. So I did feel okay about that. My sister and I may have different, different recollections about that because. Because I've got a sister that was partially raised with me and partially raised with, with, with him. So I know that she has a completely different relationship and intimacy level with him.

[Ao Wodom]

Right. And I think to your point about what you had always known from childhood, so you don't miss perhaps what you didn't know. So if it was like my grandmother is raising me, that's just what I know to be the case. And I'm not like in dire need of this relationship that people are telling me that I should have. I say this because I felt that way growing up and namely I don't think when I was a child in any way anyone was trying to make me feel like I was missing something. But as an adult in early college, people would be like, you didn't have a relationship with your dad. It must have been like this for you. And it must have been so painful. And when I was like, oh no, all I'd ever know, my parents got divorced when I was a baby, like a true baby. And so I'm like, all I've ever known is my mom raised me and I was surrounded by love and I felt fine about it. That wasn't some, there wasn't some like dad shaped hole in my heart as far as I could perceive. Really. You made a really lovely point at the top of this conversation about not perpetuating a stereotype that's so nasty about black men in fatherhood. And it was important to me, even doing this podcast, that I don't perpetuate that stereotype because my dad was not part of my life, but not because he was a black man. He went on to remarry and was very much part of his children's lives in his new marriage. And I think dads are human is one of the big messages of this podcast. All dads are human. All parents are human. That means absolutely imperfect. But I want to have conversations like this with people because you and I, I feel like just in the few minutes we've talked now have so much in common in this regard and what we were accustomed to versus what maybe other people would have liked to see for us.

[Wayne Brady]

Right? Well, if I can, yes. And to that, that I was never bothered. Right. Until it didn't hit me until later in life. And this is what I think is one of the deeper things, is now that I'm glad that I've got a son, that at this age now I have a two year old son and I'm looking forward to having conversations with him when he gets a little older. I didn't miss having my father truly in my sphere until I was. Where was I? I was backstage. I was doing the play Fences, and I was playing Corey the Sun. And I was a late bloomer in all regards. So at this point, I think maybe I was 20. 20, 20, 21. I just started to get hair. I just started to. So I'm backstage and everybody's getting ready for the show. I remember this like it was yesterday. And they're all, you know, it's all these brothers inside the dressing room talking, blah, blah, blah. It feels cool to be. Be in there with them. It's like the barbershop, except it's our dressing room and everybody's getting ready. And I see Eric, one of the cast members, next to me. He's a. And he. And he gets ready and starts shaving. All right, so I've got shaving stuff here. And I'm looking at Eric and like a. Okay. That's what men do. I'd never shaved.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh, wow.

[Wayne Brady]

Yeah. I put this thing on like, okay. And I take the razor.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh, no.

[Wayne Brady]

I. And I go, oh, for what little hair that I had. I just kept doing that because I'm like. My logic is, if hair grows, this. This is when you talk to someone who is so smart that they're stupid.

[Ao Wodom]

Huh?

[Wayne Brady]

Like, well, the hair grows out the follicle like this. So if I. Why would I go with the. In the direction of the hair, with the hair? Because then that just means. So if I shave up, the hair goes the other way. That cuts it, and it must pull it out, and that would be a clean shave. Stupid ass Wayne Brady.

[Ao Wodom]

Stupid ass Wayne Brady.

[Wayne Brady]

Stupid ass Wayne Brady.

[Ao Wodom]

That's the recipe for ingrown hairs.

[Wayne Brady]

And by the way, stupid ass Wayne Brady.

[Ao Wodom]

By the way, I was saying, ooh, ah, ooh, while you were describing that, because I was like, the first time I shaved my legs, the way I shaved skin as well, because I was too rough. What? You were. You were doing the motion. I was like, oh, my goodness. So the man cut his face up before the body.

[Wayne Brady]

I did the same thing. I. I, like, cut myself. And then, of course, immediately, the next second, bumps, my face is red. I start freaking out. Eric somebody, he came over and they put. Put some tonic on my face to bring down the bumps and ice and swelling and. And then later, he was like, dude, brother, that is not how you do that. And about a week later, once everything had calmed down and a little bit of hair started growing up, he showed me how to shave another brother a Black man stepped into that father figure role, whether he knew it or not. He stepped into that role and showed me how to shave. When I was 30, I was at the White House. I was singing at the White house. My barber, Mr. Buck, came. Came with me to clean me up. I couldn't tie my tie. All those years of being in rotc, I used clip ons. And at that point, when I was doing my talk show and my variety show and everything else, the stylist always tied. I could not tie my tie. Mr. Buck showed me there in the White House how to tie a Windsor. And to this day, that's the only knot that I can tie. But it looks dope as hell. But a black man stepped into that father figure role and showed me that I've had a few men of that. Of my community step into those roles where. And that's the only thing I think I missed with my father is, wow. I wish that my dad would have showed me how to. How to shave. I wish that I would have had the sex talk with him. I wish I would have had a relationship talk with him, which. That's the part of him that I feel that I might have, because I have never been able to make a relationship work in my entire life. And I feel that it's because of his behind.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

So. So. So those are the. The positives is if you could find your tribe and maybe fill that role. But. But then also, you'll constantly. There are things that you do miss from certain interactions.

[Ao Wodom]

That makes sense. That makes sense. And I was gonna ask you, even as you were describing the. The shaving story, my next question was gonna go, did you know how to tie a tie? Where did you learn how to tie a tie? Cause I've actually never talked to anyone on the podcast about that. And these are things that I remember growing up watching sitcoms, and it was like the moment the dad shows him how to tie a tie. It's a real father son bonding moment and something that sticks with you. And so, of course, it feels natural, though, that those moments would happen and then you would go, oh, this is something I wish my dad would have shown me. Is it important to you when you think about these moments from shaving to tying a tie with your son who is two, is it gonna be important for you? Do you feel like you're gonna go, I'm gonna really take the time to teach my son these things? Cause these things really matter to me?

[Wayne Brady]

Hell, yes. Yeah, absolutely. Those pieces of ritual, just like I'd imagine There are motherhood rituals that you must pass down. It's important. Both from a. From a functional place. Right. That. Let me teach you how to tie this tie. Because if you go into a job that needs a tie, here's how you tie to. Let me show you how to shave, because you need to. 2. Let me talk to you about sex. Let me talk to you about relationships and women and manhood and masculinity and all of these things, even down to. And I'm not saying that everyone's father, because we all come from different places, but you know what I would have loved to have learned early in my life? How to tip at a restaurant. Certain things that are just life deals, how to change this tire, how to do things like that. Oh, there's a fuse out in the circuit box. Let me show you how to do that. I learned to do those things, but I learned because I was bumping into.

[Ao Wodom]

Walls as opposed to someone going, hey, something happened in our house under the shared roof, and I wanna take this moment. Hey, Wayne, come and look at this. Come and look at this thing. Is your son Wayne Brady iii?

[Wayne Brady]

No, no, no, no. I was going to for a second, but then I wanted to, and his mother was very gracious and let me name him Val after my. My grandmother because I lost her a couple years during. During COVID So that was a big blow. Like, my grandmother was my everything. So. So I named him Val, and his name is Val Henry after her. Her father as well. So I get to. So I get to think about her every single day.

[Ao Wodom]

That's really beautiful. That's special, man. Shout out to grandmothers. I don't think we've gotten to shout them out on the podcast. I was very close to my grandmother too, and, you know, I. I don't know what it is to be a grandmother, but because I see grandparents, relationships with their grandkids and parents saying, my parents are spoiling my children and letting them have whatever they want. And I go, well, I guess that's the joy of being a grandparent, I imagine, is like, I did my job raising my kid, and now I get to just be party time, good time, good vibes over here.

[Wayne Brady]

Being a grandparent looks like the victory lap. Mm.

[Ao Wodom]

Right? That's. I feel like that's exactly the right way to look at it. Before we go into what your parenting style is like any further, I do want to ask about the Wayne Brady Jr. Of it for you. Did that in any way to you feel, like, pressure to live up to a name I always wonder when I meet a junior and I don't know that I've asked this yet.

[Wayne Brady]

I think in the household, because nobody else knows knows. But around my family, there was definitely a pressure because like, I was saying that to me, and this is completely based off of the perceptions of a child into, you know, a teen teenager, that my dad was one of those dudes, like, he really was. Like, when you think of black, tough, 70s born guy, he was that dude. So the pressure in my house was to live up to him and, well, especially with my grandmother because he was so wonderful to her and he did take care of things. What I always heard growing up in my household was about how smart my dad was, about how he graduated from high school early. And then he was raised in Puerto Rico. He and my aunt and they went to the. To the Albert Einstein Academy. There was a school and how even in the military he was always getting these degrees and dad can do this. And so there was the thing of, well, this is what your dad does. What are you going to do? Why are, why aren't you. And then when I got a little older and you're a teen, why aren't you as tough as your dad? And they didn't do it on purpose. But you know that that generation of parents, some, sometimes they talk to you in a way that they think that it's helping you aspire to something versus kicking you in the ass.

[Ao Wodom]

Right, right, right.

[Wayne Brady]

So everything that I did, I wanted to try to make sure. So, I mean, I'm lucky enough that, like, in elementary school, I was so proud that I went from kindergarten to second grade. I was proud that I was in this gifted program so I could say, dad, I was just like you. I was proud that I made this state engineering program so I could be like him because he was an army engineer, I could say. But I didn't love any of those things. So the comparison was a kick in the ass all the time until I exploded. When he passed, I yelled at my grandmother the only time in my adult life. And never yell at your mother or your grandmother.

[Ao Wodom]

You feel horrible and you think about it forever and ever. Even if you've apologized.

[Wayne Brady]

Yes, all that shit came out. All of it is like, and dad. And you always compared me and I came all the way back and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. As she's mourning her son. What a jerk. But that's what happens when you're constantly getting compared to. You got to build your own identity.

[Ao Wodom]

Right. I'm hearing you, as you say, that you felt the pressure of that comparison, and it's what made you pop off into your grandmother. Would you say ultimately, it was more important to you to make your grandmother proud or your father proud? Or is that, like, not a fair question?

[Wayne Brady]

Oh, it's not that. It's not fair. It was always important for me to make my grandmother proud. Cause, like I said, that was my sun and moon. I wanted my dad to be proud of me in general. Yeah, I absolutely wanted my dad to be proud. That's why I was glad to have that conversation with him before he passed.

[Ao Wodom]

Right.

[Wayne Brady]

I always wanted him to see what I was doing. I think me wanting him to be proud of me was. I wanted him to see that I was doing my thing, which was acting. And I wanted to be recognized for that within, not just the family sphere, But I wanted him to see that I was doing my own thing and that I was gonna be all right. And more importantly, because he would always tell me this whenever my grandmother would say something to him or he felt that. Cause I was a really good kid. But every kid mouths off sometimes. He's like, junior, look, you don't put that old lady through no changes. I was like, changes? Yeah, changes. You never put her through changes. You make sure that she is always straight and level. Cause that's what I do. Don't you put her through. So I wanted to prove to him that by acting, I'm not gonna put her through any changes. I'm gonna take care of her. She is gonna be all right. That's what I wanted him to be proud of me. So I guess, in a way, I never got that, because he did pass before I achieved any real success. And that was my whole mission the rest of my life until she passed. I said, I will always make sure that you are taking care of old lady. There's not a thing that you will ever want for. And that was my promise to him.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah. That is so powerful and moving. And I'm like, I just want to be like, Wayne Brady Jr. You did it. I feel you did it. I want to take a moment to celebrate you and all of your accomplishments. I feel like I could call my mom, who doesn't know a lot of celebrities, and be like, yeah, I know who Wayne Brady is. And I'm like, she's the. She's the barometer for me of, like, how famous is this person? Has my mom heard of them? I'm like, that is a household name. Wayne Brady. You made that a household name. So. So I think you did both of them proud, if I'm allowed to say.

[Wayne Brady]

Thank you so much.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah, I feel like you have such strong, clear values as well. And so in terms of the relationship you have with your kids, you have a 22 year old daughter, 2 year old son. What kind of father would you say you are?

[Wayne Brady]

I would like to say, you know, blanket statement. I'd like to say that I'm a good father and my daughter will attest to that. And she even left me a message yesterday, you know, I love you. Not everybody gets to hang out with their best friend. And she's. Best friend. Yeah, we lucked out. Not everyone has a 22 year old that actually wants to spend time with them.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

So her mother and I, we lucked out. In fact, I'll even show you, we went to the Grammys. She was my date because I was performing for the opening ceremony and we did this whole thing and, and I love doing stuff like that. Just because I get to show off my daughter and to show that I have this buddy who still wants to hang out. How cool.

[Ao Wodom]

22. That is quite an accomplishment for her to want to hang out with you guys at 22.

[Wayne Brady]

Oh, yeah, this is her right here. That's.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh, I think she's beautiful.

[Wayne Brady]

That's my girl. She is my pal. So I think she'll say that I'm a good father. Yeah, I think she'll say that I am a. Especially when she was coming up. I'm a strict father, okay. But I will own, like many people of my generation, I'm a very flawed man, a flawed person. And so in doing the therapeutic work, really doing a lot of therapy later in life because of a lot of the baggage that you end up accumulating and even parenting. Parenting through a filter. And you're parenting through the filter of. I come from the generation of don't talk back to me. If you even look, don't. Don't even look sideways because if you're not looking at me when I'm talking to you right, don't come here, let me snatch you. I'm gonna snatch you up. A very violent undertone.

[Ao Wodom]

That's the outer discipline.

[Wayne Brady]

I'm gonna snatch you up. Don't make me come over there if I have to. Boy, don't you ever. And me forgetting that the reason that I think to this day I'm a very quiet person when I'm on camera, I'm very quiet and very introverted is because I learned early in my house, don't talk back, even if Something's wrong. You don't talk back to me so much to the point that I remember I have a sensation in my jaw and sounding all artsy. As an actor, if I ever need to summon frustration, I just remember what my jaw feels like being looked because I can't speak. So I would always remember. Shut up. Don't say things. I realized at a certain point that I was enforcing some of those things on her. And for such a smart young lady and inquisitive. So if you as a parent sometimes don't have the answer, it's either. Because I said so. But why do I have to do that? Because I said so. Because that's what my mama did, and that's what I'm doing right now. But why? Don't ask me why.

[Ao Wodom]

Mm. Mm.

[Wayne Brady]

So flawed.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

And I own that. And we've. We've had talks about that. Cause the whole family goes to therapy, and we've had therapy together. And so I've gotten a chance to apologize. I think I'm a really good dad. But I also think that I was parenting sometimes through. Through that filter.

[Ao Wodom]

That's incredible that you guys go to therapy together. I mean, I'm just marveling at that because I'm like, how many families would be healed if they would be willing to go to therapy together? Cause there might be parties who are interested in it and open to it, but everyone's gotta be willing to go. And the fact that you guys are able to do that. Is there something that made you guys go to therapy? Is there an inciting incident or just period of time where it was like, okay, this is. I think this is necessary.

[Wayne Brady]

I know that for me, my personal therapy became. When I owned up to the fact that I was going through depression and not just going through depression, that I was that my behavior, which I also feel, you know, now after years of therapy and even going to clinical doctors. And I know that I've had clinical depression, and I know that my body chemistry, which I know that I've inherited from my father, makes me prone to depression, makes certain behaviors that I've done, especially in relationships, or even the reason that I am very quiet and I stay to myself and I isolate all those things. I had to own up to that to a certain point because I ran from it for years. I was able to get going and. And, you know, the hustle. Like, when you're in the city and you're. At first, you're trying to make it. I was too busy to notice depression or any of the behaviors. Because I'm doing a show here, auditioning there. I'm on a hustle, I'm on the ground. I get up, I do this thing. But it. And then you get some success and oh my God, I'm doing this. I got a little bit of money, Got a little bit of money. Gotta get this thing. The first chance that you get when there's a. And. And. And it catches up with you and it did catch up with me. It really caught up with me. I would say like in my late 30s, it hit me like a brick. It was either go to therapy or be very unwell. And. And my ex wife Mandy, who is my best friend. And if any of you have seen the family remix, our show on Hulu, which is our family, she is Miley's mother. She made me go to therapy. She's like, you need therapy. Therapy. There's so much that you have not unlocked. I'm fine. Therapy's for white people.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah. Was it high functioning depression, perhaps? Because the symptoms of depression as I understood them until I had heard the term high functioning depression was like, you're having trouble getting out of bed and you're not interested in your hobbies anymore. And I think it shows up differently in different people. I am no expert at all, but from what I understand now, I'm like, it just shows up differently. And do you feel like that's what it was? Because to still be able to do all that you were doing and then entertain and you're making people laugh and I know this kind of hit you like a ton of bricks once you slowed down, but it was there in the background, likely. Right.

[Wayne Brady]

It does present in a different way. And there's a whole slew of issues which I love the TikTok and Instagram information generation because you learn so much. Not only was I suffering from the chemical imbalance that needed to be corrected, but the things that I'd seen as my superpower, which is kind of why even as a kid I could play, I could imagine I could do all these things. Why I felt so frustrated with the world and then sometimes is also because of undiagnosed ADHD and add the. That I didn't know. Even the depression, all those things I thought of as my fuel, which there's a whole generation of us, we think of those behaviors as. That's just the way that it is. That's why if you go to a cookout and there's always an Uncle Jimmy in the corner talking to himself and he served either in Vietnam or in Iraq. And he's like, that's just Uncle Jimmy, man. He crazy as hell. No, he's unwell. He's unwell. And it hasn't been documented because we don't do that work. I had so much going on that I didn't notice that the wheels are falling off until I took a second. And I knew that I needed to. The catalyst of it was because I needed to be present for my daughter.

[Ao Wodom]

Right.

[Wayne Brady]

I couldn't be breaking down and having just out of the blue, I'm fine. And then I'm crying or I'm incredibly angry and I have to go pick up my daughter and take her someplace or she sees this thing happening. I can't model that behavior. I have to find out why. And that was my real impetus to start therapy. And once she became old enough, I'm in therapy, her mom's in therapy. Her mom's partner Jason is in therapy. Therapy was the next step because people think of therapy as you have to have something wrong. I like to think of therapy as, especially as a child, give this child an outlet to talk. Give this child an outlet to get what they need to get out in a safe space, which is so they don't grow up being able to feel tension and lockjaw and have, like, my head. I swear that I've got these big old things on the side. Side of my head because of all the stress that I kept. Kept in. So, so, so we definitely gave her the option for therapy, and she's been in it for 13 years now.

[Ao Wodom]

That is incredible. That's incredible. I have so many questions. I'm like, trying to figure out which one I want to. Want to ask.

[Wayne Brady]

I feel like I've been talk damn much. I know it's a podcast, but I'm just like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[Ao Wodom]

And I'm trying to shut up because you're saying so many wonderful things and, and so many rich things, and I'm like, I'm grabbing onto all of them. Okay. The first one I'll ask you is in terms of inheriting depression, because it's. There's genetics related to mental health.

[Wayne Brady]

Yeah.

[Ao Wodom]

From your father's side. Was it diagnosed in him or is this something you then figured out when you go, oh, this is the way he showed up in the world is reflective of this, this, this mental illness.

[Wayne Brady]

We had to retro fit that. Right. Because I don't know. And I also don't want to. I don't want to sound like I'm either blaming my dad. Or I'm speaking on something that he. Because I don't know. All I do know, like, I do know for certain that after he passed and. And my sister, at the time, she was working in the medical field in. In a clerical way, having access to his house because I was out. Because I was out of town. You know, he did have certain medications, which I do believe, after hearing them, that they were to treat things related. Now, even that being said, I'm pretty certain that my father did not go to therapy because he was not of that generation.

[Ao Wodom]

Sure.

[Wayne Brady]

But what I do know is that's a man that passed from a massive coronary, who. He was not even when I saw him that one time. I saw a man that I make up. I saw somebody who was in a bit of darkness, who. Who had a thing on him. And I can recognize that because. Game. Recognize, game. I know that thing.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

But even at that age, whenever I felt that thing, I was like, nope. Come on, let's go. I got something to do.

[Ao Wodom]

I got something to do. I got to do this improv.

[Wayne Brady]

I got to do.

[Ao Wodom]

Yes.

[Wayne Brady]

Make him laugh. Make him laugh. So. So I wish that I would have known. So I speculate. I speculate because a lot of the same behaviors is because of some of his medical records. But I'll never know for. For certain. But. But even in talking to the doctors, like you say, you know, that there are genetic markers of. Of that. And. And it is what it is.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah. And I don't even hear you placing any blame, because it's just science. The reality is, oftentimes your mental health. Health can be a function of genetics. That's just the science of it. And we don't actually get to pick our genetics. So I'm always like, we don't get to pick it. We just show up in the world, and we got. We got what we got. Now, in terms of your daughter calling you her best friend, which is. Man, that is beautiful, man. Thank you for sharing your dad with me today. But do you find balancing that reality with the fact that she thinks you are strict challenging? And what does that even look like? Because if I hear like, dad is my best friend, I'm like, okay, dad's fun time. And I feel like I can talk to dad. But then to hear that you're also strict. Yeah. How does that look?

[Wayne Brady]

She can talk to me, and we have amazing conversations. So I think that because her mother was even more strict, because her mom came from. Her father's Japanese, so she was raised in a Very strict environment as well. So she got double teamed in terms of the strictness. But her mother was more strict than me, like super strict. So I think that we found the balance. Yes, I love you and I'm your best friend, but I don't think that we're the best friend in a way. Because I will be the first to say to some parents, you can't be your lit. Your child's literal best friend. And I use that word intentionally. Like you see some people, yes, we're besties and we go out and we do everything together. Well, then your child has a different level of respect for you. The way that I put it as best friend is she respects me as her father. She knows my rules and my policies and my stance. But she also knows that as her friend, I have her back in this life. And as her friend, I'm not just gonna let you get away with nonsense. So that's her best friend. Her best friend is the person that has her best interest even when she doesn't wanna hear it. Sometimes I'm like, Miley, don't go to, don't go do that thing. You just don't want me to go have fun. You've been. I said no, I want you to go have all the fun in the world. But I also want you to use common sense. Why would you, as a single woman walk into that party downtown by yourself and park your car five blocks away? Why not go with someone? Why not do these things? I can't make you do things anymore, but I can surely give you an informed opinion as somebody who loves you more than anybody else.

[Ao Wodom]

Right, right, right. That makes sense. That is such a great distinction. I haven't heard it distilled that way quite yet. Now, in terms of considering one another best friends, I understand that means I have her best interests at heart. Do you want Miley to be able to tell you and talk to you about anything?

[Wayne Brady]

Yes.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

And we really worked on that because, because of how strict I was. I realized that if I would have gone down the same road that my grandmother did, I would have ended up in a relationship with my daughter where she would found out about sex from somebody else. She would have talked about heartbreak to somebody else. And I was lucky enough that I caught it early enough that now we're at a place where she can share and she shares with her mom. And there are some things that she probably doesn't share with me because they have a different relationship. But she can come to me. And even now she has a boyfriend it's newish. He's a really good dude. She introduced me to him. She asked me questions. She asked me about certain things going into it because I'd also witnessed her other. Her first love and how that that went south. And I kept. Kept my mouth shut. She trusts me now. She knows that there's no judgment. And I had to earn that because I think the way that I did parent, she felt there was judgment because I was constantly coming at her.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah, I always say that even in any relationship, even with friends, my siblings, whatever. I'm always like, it's nice when people are asking you questions to understand and true curiosity versus asking you questions with little Judg on it. And you can feel it. You can feel the difference.

[Wayne Brady]

That's who you like. Yeah.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay. All right. And I don't want to go in on Miley, and I don't even know Miley, and I want to protect Miley's business. But just as a dad, just hearing that with her first love, you were like, I kept my mouth shut. Was that hard for you to do? And what made you make that choice?

[Wayne Brady]

That was so hard to do? Because I didn't want to be judgmental. And I realized that if I would have opened my mouth and said some of the things that I really wanted to say, which I said in the beginning.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

In the beginning, I was very liberal with my comment, because I'm dead, I'll say, say what's on my mind. And I saw her begin to turn away or to maybe do things in secret, not do things in secret. But. But she wasn't as forthcoming, and maybe she didn't talk about things. And I was like, oh, I am no longer a safe haven, because I am judging her, even if I don't think that I'm judging her, even by having something to say about him saying, miley, this isn't about you, but one of my big beefs with him, and she's dating him now, so he can suck it.

[Ao Wodom]

And he really can suck it. I don't even know him, but he can suck it. My nonexistent D but go S D U.

[Wayne Brady]

So he, you know, in my household, yes, sir, no, ma'. Am, when you walk into somebody else's house, especially if you're younger and they're your elders, you always greet them. You always shake hands or you say hi. You always acknowledge the first couple times that he came over, he never did that. And the excuse was, tad, stop. He's just really shy.

[Ao Wodom]

Just really shy. We make excuses for Him, Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

I get shy. And I went up to him, you know, it's a little bit of ego. I'm like, well, you in my house. Or you say, and. And he was nice. I gave him that at first. You know, shake hands, blah, blah, blah. But I had a problem with that. And in my mind, when certain things are telling, if you're not respectful, if you can't be respectful of space or of her parents, that's got to be a little bit of a flag of. Of just a respect level in general. If you can't be respectful of her folks, is he gonna be respectful of you?

[Ao Wodom]

Listen, dad, I've heard it said, the way you do anything is the way you do everything. And you can really tell a lot by about a person, I think in some of those moments. And that is incredibly telling to me right off the bat. Now, if I'm her, and I'm kind of like, but I like this guy and he's attractive and we have this thing in common and we enjoy doing this one thing a lot, I go, okay, I'm gonna make excuses for him to make excuses for it. And I do think ultimately, yes, even in friendship, if you can feel a friend starting to judge you, you pull. You pull away. Even if that friend is right. Even if you know that friend is right, by the way.

[Wayne Brady]

Especially.

[Ao Wodom]

Especially if you know the friend is right, you're like, but I want to have my experience. So you were liberal up top. And then ultimately, how did you. You stopped saying things when I'm like, when's that sweet spot?

[Wayne Brady]

It's when I realized that I'm pushing her away.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay. Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

And. And I can't even lie to you and say it's perfect. Yeah. Because I still have a tendency to give my opinion because it's born out of care.

[Ao Wodom]

Right.

[Wayne Brady]

Like. Like last night, she's an actress as well, and she. And she. And I was helping her do a self tape. I sometimes getting notes from me if I'm coaching her on something or if I listen to her sing, and I'm like, oh, that thing. Blah, blah, blah. I'm coming from the viewpoint of I didn't have a parent in the business or somebody who did this to any success to help me. I just got bumped into walls and made it. You have me. I want to help you. I was put on this earth to help you. That's what I'm. Oh, shit. I can do it. She hears you're not good enough like that. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I have to realize that Even last night I had to just go, oh, even if I'm right, right now, I think I might be overloading her. And this isn't the interaction that she wants. And I have to be respectful of that. I have to be respectful of that interaction.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

So even now I've gotta be respectful of what I say to her as an adult, even though she's my daughter.

[Ao Wodom]

I feel like, again, parents, every parent is imperfect simply because they are human. But you seem to have mastered at least your North Star in terms of the type of parent you want to be. And that's not to say you're going to get it right every time and in every moment. That would be impossible. But I think that is such a tightrope to walk. And I think you, you get it. I'm like, that's exactly the kind I see. I'm listening to her and I go, I see why she calls you her best friend. I'm like, you get it. You get it. You respect the boundaries and understand she needs to have her experience and want her to be able to have the experiences she needs to have. Have to flourish into the person she is. Is there any other example you can think of that where maybe you lacked a thing in childhood in terms of guidance, in terms of a parent figure, and so you use that as your guide in how you parent Miley and your son, where you go, I'm doing this thing, but now I'm realizing I'm doing it because I lacked it. And I don't even think you want it, actually.

[Wayne Brady]

Oh, absolutely. And I think I've got a chance with Val. I already missed the boat with Miley, sadly. And it's where it comes to relationships. I never had healthy relationships, especially because my dad was not in the picture with my mom. They were divorced when I was 10. But even when they were married, I didn't live with them. My, my, my grandmother, you know, once my grandfather passed, my aunt divorces every. There was no one in my immediate sphere that had a healthy relationship. So. And coupled with the fact that we never talked about sex, we never talked about intimacy. You learn things on the school, school yard about girls especially, you know, in the hood. You, you hear these things and this is what you're supposed to do and this is what you say, and girls are like this, and this is what they want and dah, dah. So I think that that stuck with me. And I never modeled a healthy relationship to Miley. Even when she was growing up. The only healthy thing that she ever saw was How I treated her mother. She knew that even though her mother and I were not together anymore, and she's old enough to remember us being divorced, never spoke ill about her mother. Always said that her mother was my best friend and I was always going to take care of her. And that's something that she has seen to this day. But in terms of really having a relationship, my awkward ass way of learning about relationships and interaction cost me many relationships and how. And the work that I never did therapeutically blew up so many relationships. And I never modeled what it was like to be in a healthy, good, loving relationship. So how could I give her relationship advice? So I kind of missed that boat. Sure. So that's something that I do feel bad about. But on the flip side, her mother did model that because she's been in an amazing relationship with Jason for like 13 years and she's seen that. So it's never too late. I'm still trying.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah. I mean, you, you want to. The opportunity hopefully to show that to Val. And in terms of just modeling it, as opposed to imposing relationship advice as well, I think that is an important distinction. So I can't imagine even Miley or Val later in life rejecting your modeling, if you will. I mean, I guess they could, but it's when people impose, I think that's when you start to go, you wanted this thing. You, you were lacking this thing in childhood. Like, be it a parent who was in the industry who could give advice, you lacked it. And so now you think, I want all this advice. I, I don't want. I don't want your opinion about everything. But modeling a positive relationship, I do think, I can only imagine is helpful and powerful. Even though I do know some friends whose parents have healthy relationships and they go, well, now this feels like pressure. It feels like pressure to achieve this. So I'm telling you, it's never quite right.

[Wayne Brady]

It's never gonna be perfect.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah, it's never gonna be perfect.

[Wayne Brady]

It's like to not sound trite and to use that thing, but it's all a work in progress and especially being a parent. Here's the thing, you're never gonna. Just when you feel, even if you feel like you're hitting all the checkpoints and doing it right because your child hits stages, you only got this part right, and now we're over here, and now you have to work on this, and you probably never get that. And then you feel like you're in school and now you're two. Two chapters behind and this thing happened and There's a big quiz. So the biggest win that you could take. Like, I have such pride in the basic fact that, that I have raised a great human. And at 22 years of age, I did my part in keeping a human alive.

[Ao Wodom]

Yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

For 22 years. And now they're going to go out in the world. But I and her mother, we did that. So that's the win that I'm going to take.

[Ao Wodom]

I love that. I love that perspective and I love so many of the perspectives you shared with us. Now I'm going to take an opportunity to be a little more selfish and ask you for a piece of dad vice, please. You may or may not be an expert in the area, but because you're my dad, for the dad like you to try like a dad would. Okay. Buying property. So I bought a house that's exciting. And I was thinking, should I just keep buying properties and buy investment properties and rent them out? Is that the best use of money? And it's not because I'm just swimming in it, but I'm like, let's plan for the day that I might be swimming in it. What would I do? What would I do? I don't. You don't. Right. Would do you. Do you do a bunch of properties? Or is that such a.

[Wayne Brady]

No, no, no. Never Silly. To want to plan for the future. I can only give you the advice that has been handed off to me. Now. If you look online, there's always some Instagram or TikTok guru who they will either say buying is bad because it's a money pit and da, da. Or somebody will go, it's great. Go online to the government website and find all these abandoned properties. And you too can be a slumlord.

[Ao Wodom]

I.

[Wayne Brady]

The truth is somewhere in the middle. Like, what I'm even trying to do right now is even at this point in my life, I'm trying to build a portfolio of properties. I wasn't thinking that way in my late 20s, 30s, and 40s when I was acquiring things. Now I'm at a point where I want to be able to leave these things. And I look at people who are incredibly wealthy, and I'm talking out of show business wealthy, talking about it's property. It's a different thing. So it's a different thing. I have. I've started to invest. I'm with a commercial investment group that I've bought that have invested and bought three big commercial properties. I'm in the midst of buying a couple smaller homes that I'll rent out. I Think that if you are in a space to be able to do it and it's not going to take away from your living capital. I think you should, I think you should invest in property. Property is the one thing. And, and because I'm not an expert, mind you, that's why I have a business manager.

[Ao Wodom]

But you're my dad for the day and so I'm.

[Wayne Brady]

But I'll be your expert. I will say buying property I think is like any other thing. Don't spend more than you have. Don't overextend yourself. Because I also see people do that. They take out all these loans and they overextend. I've got 12 houses and now what you gonna do? Unless the 12 houses are bringing in, you know, an incredible amount of rent. And then do you really want to be a, do you want to be a landlord to all these things or you're going to have to hire a property manager.

[Ao Wodom]

Oh yeah.

[Wayne Brady]

If you do and you have to know the zone or ordinances, you will be responsible to some, to someone else. If you're okay with that. If you're really building in your future, start slowly and location, location, location. You want to buy in a place that maybe is on the come up. You don't want the most expensive house on the street, even if it's a house that you buy to live in. Oh, look what I just dropped 6 million on this house. Yeah, but the guy down the road, he has a house worth $200,000. So you've just taken a loss because you, your house isn't going to bring up the value. So a spend what you can spend. Spend wisely. Don't overextend yourself. Look for locations that are, that are definitely on the come up.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay.

[Wayne Brady]

It all depends on the city. Then. It depends on is this a great neighborhood, are they gentrifying or is it already great? I think that those are the things that you have to think about. But ultimately you're making the right move. Make those moves now while you're young enough to still have income coming in so that at some point your money can work for you instead of you working for money. Money.

[Ao Wodom]

Okay, I like that. And I've not heard it put quite that way. And I also just want to say it's so wild how the term location, location, location has been imprinted in our minds. I don't even know who said it first. Real estate agent said it first. But we hear it and we all know immediately what it means and we know we're talking about buying property. That is sound advice you gave me. I'm not in a position yet, but I thought would I. What would. Yeah, is that smart to do? But I think you gave me great guidelines. I think you did great. Even if you. You sounded like an expert. Sounded like a conf. To dad. Wayne Brady Jr. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you for being my dad for the day. Is there anything you would like to plug?

[Wayne Brady]

Let's see what's going on. Yeah, I would love to plug. You know, I've got the latest season of let's Make a Deal. We're getting ready to go back to work right right now. I will be on the road at some point this this year touring with my improvised musical show called Making Shit Up. I'll be back on Broadway starting in July. I can't say which show yet, but definitely check out my Instagram.

[Ao Wodom]

Thank you for doing this again. I want to say thank you so much to our listeners. We will be taking a brief hiatus on thanks dad as this is the season finale and what a way to end the season with a bang with you, Wayne Brady as my dad for the day. Thank you again and we'll see you soon.

[Wayne Brady]

Bye bye bye.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10 upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop? Voted PCMag's Reader's Choice top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere and Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit lgusa.com iheart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11. PCMag reader's choice used with permission. All rights reserved.

Season 2 of unrivaled basketball is here and the talent is unreal. The best women's players on the planet are running it back with even bigger moments and bigger stakes. Don't miss as Paige Beckers, Nafiza Collier, Kelsey Plumb, Brianna Stewart and more take the court and redefine the game. This isn't your regular season. This is unrivaled, where the pace is faster, the energy is higher and every athlete shines unrivaled basketball season two, sponsored by Samsung Galaxy, tips off January 5 on TNT, TruTV and HBO.

Max support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On public, you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index. With AI, it all starts with your prompt from renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue revenue over 20% year over year. You can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like EFTs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors, llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not investment recommendation or advice. Complete Disclosures available at public.comDisclosures@CVS it matters.

That we're not just in your community, but that we're part of of it. It matters that we're here for you when you need us, day or night. And we want everyone to feel welcomed and rewarded. It matters that CVS is here to fill your prescriptions and here to fill your craving for a tasty and yeah, healthy snack. At cvs, we're proud to serve your community because we believe where you get your medicine matters. So Visit [e-mail] or just come by ourselves Store we can't wait to meet you. Store hours vary by location.

The world's best ski and snowboard athletes are chasing medals. Now you can follow their every move. Join Insider, the official US Ski and Snowboard fan loyalty program, and get premium viewing at World cup ski events, exclusive athlete meetups, discounts from brands you love, and a custom welcome gift mailed direct to your doorstep. This this winter, show your support as they race for the podium. Head to insider.usski and snowboard.org and join today.

[Ao Wodom]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Guaranteed Human.