Podcast Episode Summary

Podcast: The Balance Theory
Episode: How to Find Confidence in Different Areas of Life | Kayla Itsines
Host: Erika De Pellegrin
Guest: Kayla Itsines
Date: November 16, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode of The Balance Theory features fitness entrepreneur Kayla Itsines in a heartfelt and wide-ranging discussion with host Erika De Pellegrin. The main focus is on building confidence, navigating the challenges of motherhood and business, breaking free from external judgment, and balancing new life chapters. Kayla and Erika lean into their experiences with motherhood, fitness, entrepreneurship, and personal growth, providing practical advice and honest reflections on how confidence develops across different areas of life.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Public Persona, Confidence & Overcoming Stage Fright (03:00–06:14)

• Kayla shares her journey from stage fright as a schoolgirl to international fitness icon.
  • She recounts her anxiety during her first public speaking experience, opting out rather than continuing her speech:

    "I remember standing up, and the piece of paper just kept shaking and shaking... I really just want to give it to... my friend." (03:13)

  • Early TV interviews left her extremely nervous:

    "I could hear my heartbeat. And I was... I hate this." (03:47)

• Building confidence comes from staying within your expertise:
  • "If you stick to a niche, people will only ask you things that you know. So I can sit shoulders back, I can answer with confidence..." (05:10)
  • Kayla emphasizes that nerves stem from uncertainty and self-doubt, but become manageable as you talk about what you know.

2. Navigating Online Criticism & Protecting Mental Health (06:14–09:48)

• Discussing the rise of online content and public scrutiny:
  • Erika: "You could still be confident in what you're putting out there, but then... people start attacking what you're saying."
• Kayla on dealing with negative reactions and misrepresentation:
  • She describes being misquoted or taken out of context:

    "Anyone could grab this piece of content, stitch it, take out a few words... and, if you say something with enough certainty, I'll look like the bad guy." (07:34)

  • Her advice:

    "If you were to sit there every single day and try to defend everyone, it would be all too consuming. Your mental health would absolutely plummet." (08:24)

• Erika’s lesson for creators: Not everyone is your audience; focus on serving those who resonate with you and let go of universal approval.

3. Motherhood, Birth Stories & Breaking the C-Section Stigma (10:19–21:31)

• Kayla opens up about pregnancy loss and choosing elective C-sections:
  • She reveals for the first time a loss before her daughter Ana:

    "I lost a baby before I had Ana, which I never, ever spoke about. And I probably still won’t speak about, but I’ll let people know, probably for the first time. They’ll hear it here…" (10:28)

  • Decision for C-section was medically recommended; stigma around this was real:
    • "Being someone in the fitness industry and being known as the queen of abs, I was like, oh my God, what does that mean?" (11:14)
    • "I vividly remember having a C-section, and someone came and said, oh, you took the easy route." (11:59)
• Both share how actual birth rarely aligns with expectations:
  • Erika discusses her "stigma" and emotional process:

    "I had all these feelings surface around the stigma I had associated with a C-section about it not being this… I’m not giving birth, right?" (13:20)

Notable Segment:

"As long as baby's safe and healthy...the mom being calm is actually such a big role." – Erika (15:17)

4. Recovery Realities & Rebuilding Postpartum Confidence (16:25–24:51)

• Physical and emotional challenges after C-section:
  • Kayla describes her first time getting up after surgery:

    "I felt like every organ in my body was about to fall out of me at once, and it was just this extreme shooting pain." (16:25)

  • Recovery is universally hard, no matter the method of childbirth.
• Dealing with expectations and the concept of "bouncing back":
  • Kayla rejects bounce-back culture:

    "You’re not the same person as you were before. You are building from scratch, a whole new you. You have different responsibilities, you have a whole different body that has just birthed a child." (23:27)

• Both women find pride in rebuilding strength and honoring what their bodies have accomplished:
  • Erika: "I actually feel like I'm rebuilding on a stronger ground." (24:37)
  • Kayla: "Anything you do now, you'll be extra proud of yourself because you’ve prioritized your health." (24:12)

5. Fitness Advice—Who to Trust and Gender Perspectives (25:26–27:13)

• Kayla’s frank take on where she sources her pregnancy and postpartum fitness advice:
  • "The only expert that I really truly see in this field is someone who has fully experienced pregnancy and post pregnancy, and that is a woman." (25:26)
  • She treads carefully, emphasizing lived experience over mere qualification:

    "If I am taking advice, it’s from a person who’s had a baby." (26:21)

• Admits that doctors and male trainers play a role, but she prefers advice from someone who "gets it."

6. Diversifying Wealth and Business Evolution (28:15–31:45)

• On managing business success and financial planning:
  • Kayla’s strategy:

    "The first thing that I did was things like property...residential then commercial property, moving into investments. You just don't want to have all your eggs in one basket." (28:15)

  • She hired a wealth management team to help diversify and avoid "Kayla Tax" (i.e. paying more because of her fame).
  • Frustration about still being pigeonholed as "just a fitness person":

    "People find that crazy that I’m not just fitness. Just…yeah, just a burpee." (30:33)

7. Life Beyond Fitness & Consulting Opportunities (31:45–34:34)

• If not fitness, Kayla would love to invest and advise, particularly in female-focused environments.

  • "Even being an advisor...when it comes to fitness and going into things like gyms and hotels and advising and saying, you know, if I was working out here as a female, what would make me feel comfortable?" (32:57)

• Appreciates the growing demand for women-only gym spaces, both overseas and in Australia.
  • Erika and Kayla both note how these spaces foster confidence and comfort for women.

8. Parenting Philosophies: Boys vs. Girls & Generational Shifts (35:59–43:42)

• Kayla reflects on how she parents her son and daughter:
  • Stricter with her son to ingrain respect and kindness, partly as a reaction to traditional patriarchal patterns from her Greek upbringing:

    "I don't ever want to see my son sitting on a couch whilst a family of women are cleaning in a kitchen." (36:38)

  • Ultimately, Kayla and Erika agree personality matters more than gender, but biology (like boys' energy levels) can influence approach.
  • The importance of children mirroring their parents’ shared roles is highlighted:

    "Your kids are going to...mirror your parenting style now with the modern ways of women work." (41:30)

  • Kayla is determined her children keep their "spark" and self-confidence:

    "When do they lose that spark and how does that happen? I'm scared. Like, I don't want my kids to ever...lose that." (39:29)

9. Rapid Fire: Fitness Myths & Industry Gripes (43:42–45:36)

• What's something people think is healthy, but isn't?
  • Kayla: Letting a fitness journey "consume you" is unhealthy. It should not eclipse life’s "non-negotiables" like family time and joy. (43:51)
  • Quote:

    "You need to hit those non-negotiables before you let a fitness journey consume your entire life." (44:18)

• Biggest lie the health industry sells?
  • Frenzied pursuit of longevity and wellness fads, with endless routines most don't have time or resources for.
  • Quote:

    "I love the longevity stuff, but... we don’t have time for a two hour gym session with an ice bath and a sauna and a red light therapy..." (45:04)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Kayla on confidence:

  "The more confidence you have in what you're saying, the better it becomes." (06:14)

• On public perception and pressure:

  "If you were to sit there every single day and try to defend everyone, it would be all too consuming. Your mental health would absolutely plummet." (08:24)

• On rebuilding after childbirth:

  "You are building from scratch, a whole new you. …anything you do now, you'll be extra proud of yourself because you've prioritized your health." (23:27, 24:12)

• On women in fitness spaces:

  "I would love a women’s only gym. ...I felt so comfortable. We need more of this. I don’t know why I feel more comfortable. I just do." (34:11)

• On healthy living:

  "Letting it [fitness] consume you...I don’t believe that it’s a healthy way to live your life." (43:51)

• On generational changes:

  "Your kids are going to exactly what you said. Mirror your parenting style now with the modern ways of women work. Women are powerful. Like, women have jobs..." (41:30)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00–03:00 – Kayla’s early experiences with stage fright
• 03:00–06:14 – Building public-speaking confidence
• 06:14–09:48 – Handling online hate and mental boundaries
• 10:19–13:59 – Birth stories, C-section stigma, and expectations vs. reality
• 16:25–21:22 – Recovery challenges and first-time-mum moments
• 23:27–24:51 – Rejecting bounce-back culture, rebuilding postpartum
• 25:26–27:13 – Who to trust for fitness and postpartum advice
• 28:15–31:45 – Wealth management, investments, and "Kayla Tax"
• 32:57–34:34 – Supporting female-centric fitness environments
• 35:59–43:42 – Parenting boys vs. girls; generational shifts in roles and values
• 43:42–45:36 – Rapid fire: Myths about healthy living and the fitness industry

Tone & Style

• Conversational, honest, and empowering. Both Erika and Kayla use personal anecdotes and humor to lower the barriers on tough topics like body image, public scrutiny, and the pressures of balancing career and motherhood. The episode is filled with practical advice, vulnerability, and relatable moments—making it not just informative but also supportive for listeners in similar life stages.

Conclusion

This episode offers a refreshing, real-world look at how confidence weaves through all areas of life, from the gym to the nursery to the boardroom. Kayla Itsines invites listeners to honor their unique journeys, release perfectionism, and embrace new chapters with curiosity and self-compassion. Whether you’re an aspiring entrepreneur, young parent, or someone navigating change, you’ll find both comfort and actionable inspiration in this candid conversation.