Full Show PT 3: Friday, December 19 [Vault]

Summary

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The Bert Show – Full Show PT 3: Friday, December 19 [Vault]

Date: December 19, 2025
Host: Jeff & The Bert Show Cast (Jen, Producer Tracy, Charlie, Phil Turano, Intern Jen)

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Episode Overview

This episode delivers the classic Bert Show blend of real-life listener drama, the cast’s comedic takes on social quirks, and playful on-air dares. The show features a lively "Second Date Update" segment dissecting early dating etiquette, a hilarious group therapy riff on the never-ending battle for the car's front seat, and a playful fulfillment of a wager between cast members following a high school football rivalry. The show exhibits its trademark mix of honest conversation and infectious laughter, bringing listeners into their world for a morning pick-me-up.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Second Date Update: A Matter of the Couch vs. the Bed

Timestamps: [01:25] to [17:58]

• Background: Chad calls in, puzzled as to why Charlie hasn't returned his calls after a seemingly perfect weekend together — set up by friends, a party, dinner, movie, and an unexpected overnight stay (she crashed on his couch).
• Chad’s Perspective:
  • Divorced, friends have been setting him up ([02:11])
  • He recaps the date—everything seemed great, including a friendly goodnight kiss.
  • After a late night, Charlie stays over but sleeps on the couch. Chad is confused by her subsequent silence.
• Studio Panel Theories:
  • Jen and Jeff wonder if "something weird" about Chad’s home might be the issue.
  • Craig (caller) theorizes it could be a matter of not expressing enough interest ([06:03]).
• Charlie’s Side:
  • Charlie joins the call, surprised to be on air ([06:56]).
  • She reveals her main issue: Chad didn’t offer her his bed, which she considers basic courtesy. “If I have guests, I always give up my bed…” ([08:13])
  • The studio splits: Jen and Jeff debate social norms—Jen finds sharing a guy’s bed gross; Jeff sides with Charlie that the offer, not the execution, matters ([09:34]).
  • Charlie clarifies: “It’s just the offer…I don’t know, maybe that’s just how I was raised, but…” ([10:36]).
• Other Red Flags:
  • Charlie also didn’t like that Chad let her pay the tip at dinner. Her expectation: if he truly wants to impress, he should have insisted on covering everything ([11:32]).
  • Cast members debate whether this is too harsh or just personal preference.
• Chad’s Response:
  • He worried that offering his bed might be too forward and didn’t want her to feel pressured ([14:11]).
  • Notes he’s faced criticism from women both for insisting on paying and for letting women contribute ([13:11]).
• Resolution:
  • After hashing it out, both agree they’d be open to a second date, with Charlie admitting she was perhaps too quick to judge: “Now that I hear him explain, makes sense to me. And I probably shouldn't have cut him off so quickly…” ([15:48])
  • Highlights the importance of clear communication and reconciling personal ‘deal breakers’ in early dating.
• Notable Quotes:
  • “I just thought it was impolite. And I just thought, you know how you meet people and they're just sort of, like, out for themselves first... maybe there were other hints throughout the night...” – Charlie ([10:49])
  • “I was kind of assuming that I was not going to, you know, try to get with you that night...if by offering you the bed, maybe you would think that I was pushing the limit.” – Chad ([14:11])
  • “Everybody's got signs, though...like, if the guy doesn't open your door for you, then he's probably not a guy you want to continue going out with.” – Jeff ([15:19])

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2. Group Therapy: The Eternal Fight for "Shotgun"

Timestamps: [18:18] to [23:59]

• Jeff’s Story:
  • Witnesses two teenage brothers fighting over the front seat at Kroger's parking lot ([18:29]).
  • Studio unpacks the universal fight for "shotgun"—a facet of family and friend dynamics that spans childhood to adulthood.
• Cast & Audience Reflections:
  • Jen: “You're the favorite friend if you're next to the driver. The sucky friends get in the back seat.” ([20:01])
  • Callers and cast share tactics—fake car sickness, playing up height or health issues, and the ritual birthday “front seat” privilege ([21:18], [22:44]).
  • Makes light of adult politeness rituals (“No, you get the front seat…”), admitting that underlying these remains a childish glee at winning ([22:05]).
• Comedic Moments:
  • Hilarious escalation: Rock-paper-scissors, repeated challenges, and even jokingly calling “shotgun” when getting arrested ([23:56]).
• Notable Quotes:
  • “If you're 60 years old...you're still doing rock, paper, scissors to see who gets the front seat.” – Jeff ([23:23])

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3. The Rivalry Bet: On-Air 10-Second Kiss

Timestamps: [24:02] to [32:43]

• Set Up:
  • High School Football bet: If Harrison Hoyas beat Wheeler, Intern Jen (Wheeler alum) must kiss Phil Turano (Harrison alum) for 10 seconds live on air ([24:24]).
• Recap of Game:
  • Harrison wins decisively ([25:09])
  • Playful banter about school pride, swag, and Phil’s loyalty to his side despite Jen's attempts to lure him over ([25:27]).
• The On-Air Kiss:
  • Logistics: Stopwatch out; strict rules—if the kiss breaks, clock resets ([27:28], [29:10]).
  • Butterflies, banter, technical delays (camera battery dies mid-kiss), but ultimately a successful, if awkward, “lip lock” ([30:01], [31:40]).
  • Studio reactions: Amusement, teasing, and mock concern—“Jen needs a pregnancy test!” ([32:29]).
• Notable Quotes:
  • “Go make it happen, boy. Get up in there.” – Jeff, encouraging Phil ([29:54])
  • “A little more sensual than I thought it was going to be. A little on the uncomfortable side of this thing.” – Jeff ([32:35])

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Most Memorable Moments

• Charlie’s “Dealbreaker”: The surprising role that seemingly small acts of courtesy—or their omission—can play in dating outcomes.
  • “It’s just the offer…I don’t know, maybe that’s just how I was raised…” ([10:36])
• Annual Debate, Eternal Front Seat: Universality of “shotgun” drama, from siblings in grade school up to adults negotiating politeness on nights out.
• Public Payoff of a Wager: The escalating antics, nervous laughter, and group ribbing around the live 10-second kiss make for one of the most lighthearted segments—capturing the show's signature spontaneous fun.

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Important Timestamps

• [01:25] – Start of Second Date Update
• [06:56] – Charlie joins the call
• [10:36] – Debate over “the offer” and personal standards
• [14:11] – Chad explains his reasoning
• [15:48] – Charlie’s reversal and openness to another date
• [18:18] – Shotgun battle segment begins
• [21:18], [22:44] – Listeners call in with their own shotgun wars
• [24:02] – Football bet setup; Phil and Jen relive their teams; parameters for the on-air kiss
• [27:28], [29:10], [31:40] – The live bet and subsequent antics

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Summary Tone & Takeaway

The Bert Show keeps it playful, accessible, and honest—never shying away from poking fun at themselves or one another. They turn ordinary social scenarios (first dates, riding in cars, school pride) into opportunities for audience connection and laughter, making “listener drama” both relatable and jovial. The show demonstrates how even trivial customs reveal deeper expectations and quirks in relationships, all while keeping the morning upbeat and entertaining.

For new listeners:
Expect genuine, lighthearted conversation, real-life relationship debates, and an anything-goes energy—anchored by a cast that doesn’t take themselves too seriously but always brings listeners in on the fun.

Transcript

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[Jeff]

Hey, Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. You know, one of the perks about having four kids that you know about is getting a direct line to the.

[Chad]

Big man up north.

[Jeff]

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[Jen]

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[Jeff]

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[Jen]

See mintmobile.com.

[Jeff]

Hey, the Birch Show. All right, second date update. Who are we talking to first here? Jeff?

[Producer Tracy]

Chad.

[Jeff]

Chad. And again, second date update. Generally, this usually happens the other way around where the woman thinks that the date went great.

[Charlie]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

And can't figure out why he's not calling her back. But it's a little different here today because it's Chad. Hey, Chad.

[Chad]

Hey. What's going on?

[Jeff]

How are you this morning?

[Chad]

I'm all right.

[Jeff]

Okay. Usually the rules of engagement are this. You know, you'll tell us about what happened between you and whatever her name is. We'll try to kind of predict and figure out exactly what wrong. What went wrong before we even call her. And then we'll get her on, and we will try to strong arm her into complete honesty with you. So if nothing else, at least you can walk out of here with some closure on the whole thing, you know? Right on all right, so what happened?

[Chad]

Well, let's see, I guess. Well, I was divorced a couple of years ago. About. Actually just about a year and a half. And my friends have been trying to set me up with all sorts of people and lately they've been talking about this woman, Charlie. And there was a party, it was two weeks ago, the weekend before Labor Day on Saturday night. And she was there. And I got a chance to meet her. We totally hit it off. And it was. We talked all night and we had a couple drinks and we had a lot to talk about. It was really nice. We even kissed a little bit at the end of the night and we had a great time, but we went home separately. But I asked her out for the next day. And so on Sunday we met at like. I think it was like 4 o', clock, 4:30 over at Houston's and just had a couple of drinks and then like some appetizers, went over to Phipps Plaza and caught a movie. And then we ended up back at my place, which, you know, we had a cocktail and just hung out and, you know, we kissed a little bit more but, you know, nothing totally happened. But it was a really nice night and it got really late and she didn't want to sleep with me, so I was like, that's cool, you can stay here.

[Producer Tracy]

So you guys met on Saturday and she spent the night on Sunday?

[Chad]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we didn't sleep in the same bed. She slept on the couch and I slept in the bed and everything was cool. She had to work the next morning and so she took off at like, I don't know, 5:30 or 6 and went back to her place, you know, to change and everything. And since then I called twice, but she never called me back. And I don't know why, because, I don't know, everything went. I mean, it really did go perfectly.

[Jeff]

Everything seemed to click and conversation was fine. And I'm sure you're looking back at this date and you're going over every minute. You can't figure out where it went wrong exactly.

[Chad]

I mean, we have mutual friends and everything. You know, we're. I mean, we're both into the same kinds of music and, you know, I mean, it just was. I don't know. I don't know what happened. But she won't call me back and. And I don't wanna keep calling, you know. Cause I don't wanna. I'm not the stalker type. You know what I mean?

[Sarah Gibson Tuttle]

Mm.

[Jen]

Well. And it seems like a lot of times when we do this sort of thing or we talk about dating. Girls get freaked out by guys, places. Like, maybe something was weird about your place, but if she spent the night there, then obviously something wasn't that weird about it.

[Jeff]

Is there anything in that living room or in that area near where she slept that would incriminate you of something ugly?

[Chad]

I mean. No. I mean, I just moved, so it's like I got rid of everything. I mean, I basically, like, got r my whole life. And, like, there's just, like, there's a television, a DVD player. I mean, you know, obviously I thought that maybe she'd come back with me, So, I mean, I'd hoped anyway. And I, you know, of course I cleaned and cleaned. You know, I swiffered and mopped and the whole thing.

[Jeff]

You can't believe how clean we will make an apartment look, even though it's not. But if you open up that one door where we've thrown all that crap, you're gonna. You're gonna call us out.

[Chad]

Well, that's just it. I just got. I just moved. So I got rid of all that. You know what I mean? Like, I just. Garbage bags full of stuff that I got rid of. So, I mean, there really was. I mean, I can't imagine what would have happened. I mean, I really can't. That she snooped or anything. And I don't. I don't think I snore. I don't know. But, you know, it was only, like, two hours of sleeping. Anyway, we talked way into the night, so.

[Jeff]

All right. Craig has a theory. Hey, Craig, you're on all the hits Q100.

[Charlie]

Yes, sir.

[Chad]

I got one question.

[Charlie]

Does she know that you like her?

[Chad]

I mean. Yeah. I mean, I think so.

[Jeff]

And they went out the next day after the party and spent the whole day and night together, so. Yeah, I would think so.

[Chad]

Right. And then. So you made her sleep on the couch as opposed to giving up the bed? Yeah, I mean, I just kind of offered the couch. I mean, she was already, like, kind of passed out there.

[Jen]

I don't think that's a big deal. Cause I would not want to sleep in a guy's bed. Sheets that I didn't know very well. I'd rather sleep on the couch. Yeah. If I was, you know, too tipsy to drive home or whatever and was gonna spend the night on the couch, that would be the choice. Rather than. Unless you got clean sheets. I don't. I don't want to be in your bed, so.

[Jeff]

Wouldn't make. So that doesn't make any Sense. Jeff has gotten Charlie on with us, and I do believe she knows why she's on. Hey, Charlie.

[Charlie]

Hello.

[Jeff]

How are you?

[Charlie]

I'm good.

[Jeff]

Good. You're on the radio now. And all the hits, Q100.

[Charlie]

Oh, okay.

[Jeff]

Okay. Charlie, we have Chad on the phone with us.

[Chad]

Hey, Charlie.

[Charlie]

Hi.

[Jeff]

And he said he's been trying to get in touch with you for a while now, but you haven't been returning his phone calls. And we do a little thing here called Second Date Update where we're hoping that you'll come completely clean with them and be honest on why there hasn't been a second date and.

[Charlie]

What?

[Jeff]

Chat.

[Chad]

Yeah, okay.

[Charlie]

God.

[Chad]

Okay.

[Jeff]

What?

[Jen]

Chase?

Jeff didn't prepare?

[Jeff]

No, not so well.

[Jen]

I'm just.

[Charlie]

I just. I can't believe. Okay.

[Jeff]

Did you just wake up?

[Charlie]

Well, I'm just a little surprised to do this on, like, radio. Okay, go ahead. I'm sorry, Chad.

[Jeff]

This is the part where you say you'd rather her be honest and have closure on the whole thing than be left in the dark and you talk her into telling us on the radio.

[Chad]

Yeah, Charlie, I just. I'm not sure. I mean, I thought we hit it off great and I don't know, we had a great night. And then since you left for work, I never heard from you and I'd love to know why.

[Charlie]

Well, it's okay.

[Jeff]

To be totally honest.

[Charlie]

I just. I thought we did hit it off great. And I had total fun time and it was. I just felt like, you know, when we were back your place and stuff, and I crashed and I just kind of thought, like, you didn't even offer that I could. You didn't even offer up, like, your bed. Like, I don't know, I'm used to. If I have guests, I always give up my bed for a guest. It's like, so. Like, I just was born and raised that way. My mother's always done it anytime, you know, many of her girlfriends were over and slipped over. I had to give my bed. It's just so. I just thought that was sort of a little rude and I was kind of put off by that.

[Jeff]

We had a caller when we had Chad on just a couple of minutes ago, we had a caller on that tried to predict on what happened, and he said the same thing.

[Jen]

That surprises me, though.

Yeah, me too. Charlie, Jen and I disagreed with the caller because we thought it was more of him being a gentleman doing that.

[Jeff]

Were you just upset that he never offered?

[Charlie]

I don't think that is being a gentleman. I think it's I think it's kind of like just sticking me on the couch.

[Jen]

You would have rather slept in his sheets? His dirty sheets?

[Charlie]

Well, yeah, I don't know if they were dirty, but I would rather have had him offer because to me, that's the. You know, that's the bed. That's, like, where you put your guests.

[Jeff]

I agree. I agree with her 100%. At least you make the offer, even if it grosses you out as a woman, as a guy, I think it's only polite to say, look, you take what is supposed to be the more comfortable of the two situations.

[Jen]

Okay?

That's it. So the. So it's not that he invited you into his bed with him in it. What you're saying is you would have preferred him to sleep on the couch and you in the bed.

[Charlie]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Okay. All right. I was confused.

[Charlie]

Well, and at least give me the option.

[Jeff]

Yeah, I understand that. Because if it was said that, look, you guys weren't gonna sleep together that night, but you were gonna be in the house, then I think, Chad, you've got a. The polite thing to do is offer up, like I said, what is supposed to be the most comfortable of the situations. And that should be the bed.

[Charlie]

Right?

[Jeff]

Unless you're a germaphobe, like, Chen hobby, and you won't take it.

[Jen]

I don't know why, but that just grosses me out. Like. Yeah, if he. If he was, like, you know, offering the bed and then said he would change the sheets into, like, a new set of sheets, then maybe that's a different story. But I'm not getting in some dude's bed.

[Jeff]

But is it the offer? Let's forget about it.

[Charlie]

Let's say he's really clean, though. Like, his apartment was really clean.

[Jeff]

It was the offer that's. That's bothering you?

[Charlie]

It's just the offer.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Charlie]

Like, I. I don't know. Maybe that's just how I was raised, but.

[Jen]

Well, Charlie, what does that say about Chad? Like, because obviously it turns you off so much that you didn't return his calls. Like, how. What do you think that says about him?

[Charlie]

I just thought it was. It was impolite. And I just thought, you know how you meet people and they're just sort of, like, out for themselves first, and that's. I mean, maybe there were other hints throughout the night when I.

[Jeff]

When I was dating. Here's what I looked at on that first date. It's never going to get better between the two of you than it is on those first couple of dates.

[Charlie]

Is that Your best behavior.

[Jeff]

That's your best behavior. So. And you're doing anything you can to, A, make a good impression, and B, make that person as comfortable as possible. And if the thought process there isn't that. He was thinking, hey, I need to make her as comfortable as possible, then maybe there's a bigger problem there.

[Charlie]

And, well, there was one more thing, too, right?

[Jen]

You were talking about other signs that he may be out for himself.

[Charlie]

Yeah, we were. When we went to Houston's, which was great, and. And everything. I just, you know, I kind of felt bad he wanted to pay the whole bill, which. Well, I didn't feel bad, but I. You know, I know sometimes it could be a little awkward. It's like our first real dinner, and, you know, so I said, well, can I pay the tip? And he let me, and I don't like that.

[Jen]

So you offered, but he should have turned you down.

[Charlie]

He should have been like, no, are you crazy?

[Jeff]

You had me up until then.

[Jen]

Yeah.

You know, because my thing is, like, I don't know if I would have been as crazy critical about the couch thing, because I think I would have been more impressed that he brought me to his house and still allowed me to feel safe, because he. Because I feel like if a guy was only up for himself, like, he would have tried his best to have you in the bed with him and then. Or kick you out. You know what I'm saying? And then now you offered to do the tip, and because he didn't turn you down, even though he bought dinner, I just. I feel like you're holding him up to an impossible standard.

[Jeff]

I don't think. I don't think she is. I really don't. I mean, I would have handled it that way. If you would have offered the tip, I would have said, there's not a chance. No way I would have done that. However, the fact that you offered makes it okay for him to say, okay, then go ahead and leave the tip. I don't think there's anything wrong with that part of the equation, but the part of him letting you sleep on the couch without even offering I think says something.

[Charlie]

Yeah, I don't like that, Chad.

[Chad]

Yeah, I mean, the tip. I mean, I've actually had a problem the other way when I've refused that I must pay the whole bill, that they're like, oh, what are you trying to control things here? You know, and it's. It's totally backfired.

[Jen]

You can't win.

[Jeff]

These mixed messages.

[Chad]

You can't win on that one. It Just depends on person to person, really.

[Jen]

Some women want chivalry. Other women think that you're insulting them.

[Chad]

Right. What, you don't think I can make money? You know, that sort of thing.

[Jeff]

Hold on one sec, y'.

[Chad]

All.

[Jeff]

Birch show listener. Erin, good morning.

[Charlie]

Good morning.

[Jeff]

Hi.

[Charlie]

I just wanted to say I totally agree. I'm not trying to make him feel bad, but I do agree about he probably should have just offered the bed and told her that he would sleep on the couch. That's what I would have preferred.

[Jeff]

Just the offer is really what's bothering you here, right, Charlie?

[Charlie]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

That you never even got the offer. He never even thought about it.

[Charlie]

He just kind of, like, started bringing out pillows and a blanket, and it was like, okay, that's like something I.

[Jeff]

Would do to one of my guy friends, you know?

[Charlie]

That's what it felt like.

[Jeff]

You make it comfortable for your guy friend on the couch, but if it's a woman, you would give her what is going to be the more comfortable of the situations.

[Charlie]

Yeah. I felt I wasn't even, like, good enough in maybe.

[Chad]

Can I say my perspective on that?

[Jen]

Sure.

[Charlie]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Chad]

I mean, I was kind of assuming that I was not going to, you know, try to get with you that night. And I would. And if by offering you the bed, maybe you would think that I was pushing the limit of, you know, sexual.

[Charlie]

Contact, you wouldn't be in the bed.

[Chad]

Right. But, you know, sometimes if I say, here, come in the bed, that means that maybe I'm gonna end up being in there, too, because I'll try to kiss you more, and then we'll be in the bed. Like, let's move this to the bedroom. You know what I mean? That's why I didn't, like, do that. I mean, otherwise, I would have loved to have slept in the bed with you, or I wouldn't have mind offering you the bed. But it seemed like things were going well, and I didn't want to push it, knowing that.

[Jeff]

Charlie. Would you go out with Chad again?

[Charlie]

Yeah, I think I would.

[Jeff]

Chad, do you even want to go out with Charlie again?

[Chad]

I mean, sure. I mean, we've had this awkward radio moment, but, I mean, hadn't it been fun? I mean, I thought we had a nice time together, and that's more important than anything.

[Jeff]

You know, everybody's got signs, though. Like, we've talked about this before. Like, everybody has a sign. Like, I forget what movie it was, that the sign was that if the guy doesn't open your door for you, then he's probably Not a guy you want to continue going out with.

[Charlie]

Bronx tale.

[Jeff]

Is it a Bronx Tale? Okay, well.

[Jen]

And there's all. Yeah, there's all kinds of signs, you know, them opening doors and things like that. But still, it. I don't know, it seems to me that she's a little bit high maintenance.

[Jeff]

Hey, Charlie, can we get some closure here? Would you go out again with Chad, or is this thing over?

[Charlie]

I would, because I actually just. Like, that's just how I am. I just see something, I go, eh, done. But now that I hear him explain, makes sense to me. And I probably shouldn't have cut him off so quickly. That's just kind of how I am.

[Jeff]

Chad, did you get what you wanted out of this?

[Chad]

Sure. I mean, yeah, absolutely. I mean, I just. I was just wondering why she wasn't calling, but I thought maybe she left on a vacation or. I didn't know, you know.

[Jeff]

Are you kind of turned off by the way she handled the whole. I mean, you've been calling and calling and calling. She hadn't called you back.

[Chad]

Well, I understand that this sort of thing happens. I mean, remember, I've been married and divorced, so, you know, I've been. I feel like I've been around, you know, the block. And I understand that sometimes people have their things, you know, So I just would rather them be on the table and honest and direct, and that if I say something like, you know, if you say. If you say I'll get the tip, just mean that I want to get the tip as opposed to. Because I was gonna pay the whole thing.

[Jen]

We're so encrypted.

[Jeff]

Good luck. Good luck with that.

[Chad]

That's the best. But at least if we could start out that way before, you know, everybody starts, you know, throwing signs and stuff and, you know, I don't know. I mean, I understand because, I mean, I've done it in the past myself, you know, so, you know, had these things and Charlie been like you before, you know, where it's like, one thing happens and, you know, whether they're a smoker or, you know, or I go to their house and it's dirty or like, you know, just. There's always, like, a deal breaker, and I totally shut down, you know.

[Jeff]

Hey, y', all, we have to take off. We gotta roll. Cause Raven Simone just came in. Okay, so does that mean you're gonna start taking his phone calls again? Here, Charlie.

[Charlie]

I will.

[Jeff]

Very good.

[Charlie]

Okay, thank you, guys.

[Jeff]

All right, Chad, glad you made the call now.

[Chad]

Yeah, definitely.

[Jeff]

It was worth the awkward radio moment.

[Chad]

Exactly.

[Jeff]

All right, man.

[Chad]

Thanks, everybody.

[Jeff]

Talk to you later. Bye. Bye. That may be the first time we've ever done it where it's worked out to where both parties are like, yeah, let's go out again in three years.

[Jen]

Actually turned into a second day.

[Jeff]

It turned into a second day. You still don't feel comfortable with it, though. You think she's too high maintenance.

[Jen]

Beware, Chad. That's all I gotta say, really. He's wanting total honesty now. Like, as long as we have it on the table. And I just. People don't change.

[Jeff]

Yeah, we don't want honesty.

[Jen]

People don't change. Charlie's gonna be the same way she was over that weekend. She's not change just because he, you know.

I don't know.

[Jeff]

Hey, the bird show. I want us to spend a second dissecting one social phenomenon that has been passed down from generation to generation that I saw come to a head in a fight the other day.

[Jen]

You saw a fight?

[Jeff]

I saw a fight the other day.

[Jen]

A fist fight.

[Jeff]

It was a fist fight. A wrestling fight. Awesome. Okay.

[Producer Tracy]

I haven't seen a fight in years.

[Jeff]

I don't think this appeared to me between. To be between brothers. Whoa. I am. I'm at the gym, working out and I'm on the treadmill. And the way my gym is set up, it's like on the second story, so I can. And it's set up in a big, like, strip mall. There's a Kroger right there and there's a big parking lot. So as I'm working out on the treadmill, I'm looking out and kind of gazing off and seeing what's going on in the parking lot. And I notice one mom who appears to be in her, I don't know, mid-40s, you know, and it appears that she's got like two teenage boys with her and they're all getting ready to get into their big Tahoe or suburban or whatever it is, right? So mom goes into the car and closes the door and both kids go on their side of the car and immediately start fighting about who is gonna get the front seat. Shotguns.

[Phil Turano]

Shotguns.

[Jeff]

You can almost see them both say shotgun. Alright. And they couldn't come to a conclusion on it to the point where they started pushing each other and wrestling with each other in the parking lot of the Kroger.

[Jen]

And how old are these people?

[Jeff]

He could have been anywhere from 12 to 15 years old. They were really starting to go at it over that front seat. Oh, y. I remember having the same feel like all the way. I still have it. Like if there are three guys going out and I never want to be the guy in the back seat, I want to be the guy in the coveted passenger spot. And I want to know what's so great about that seat that we would fight over it.

[Jen]

It's almost like it's. You're the favorite, you're the favorite friend. Like if you're next to the driver, so you're important. The sucky friends get in the back seat.

[Listener/Caller]

It is, it's almost like it's like a royalty position. It's like there's the president, the vice president, and then there's the secretary of arms or whatever. Yeah, back seat, you have to lean forward to get in on the conversation. You have no control over the radio.

[Jen]

The radio is always so much louder in the back seat, so you can't even like hear yourself talk.

You don't get the air conditioning sometimes.

[Listener/Caller]

Yeah, you're like the navigator. That's what I always was. My buddy, Scott Griever, he had the car, I was the navigator. So I controlled the radio, the equalizer, the ac. It was all about the front seat backseat. The only thing in the back seat was like, throw me a bag of potato chips, you God.

[Jeff]

But you act like you're back there all by, like it's four miles.

[Sarah Gibson Tuttle]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

That you're away from your friends. I mean, they're within earshot. You could get in on the conversation. The view is pretty much the same from the back seat as it is the front passenger side seat.

[Jen]

But then you try to be the good friend. Like, oh no, you get in the front seat. No, no, no, you get in the front seat and then. But if I offer somebody the front seat and they take it, then I'm standing there dumbfounded like, well, you're not supposed to take it.

[Producer Tracy]

Producer Tracy just sent me an instant message and said that two weeks ago she was out with her mom and her sister and her and her 21 year old sister got in a shoving match to ride in the front seat.

[Jeff]

Never goes away. It never goes away.

[Jen]

I had a friend in college who would lie and say that she would get car sick to everybody so that she never had to go in the backseat. That was always her excuse. Well, you know, I gotta ride up front. Cause I get really car sick in the back. She didn't get car sick, she just wanted the passenger seat.

[Listener/Caller]

See, now I almost have like a handicap sticker because being so tall, everybody just assumes that I need to get in the front seat. So they give it up to me anyway, which is pretty cool.

[Jen]

Anyway, maybe I need to use the whole kidney thing. Like my scar. I gotta stretch out because I gotta scar.

[Jeff]

There you go. I went out with a couple of guys to the Braves game on, what, two nights ago. And it was a guy that I know fairly well and a new guy. So we were doing the whole polite thing. Hey, do you want to sit in the front seat? No, you sit in the front seat. No, you sit in the front seat. And he took the back seat. And I got to tell you, I was so relieved you liked him even better.

[Jen]

Like, you're like, okay, he can be in our group now. I felt like he was.

[Jeff]

I was like, yay, I get the front seat.

[Jen]

Now, as the driver, have you ever been disappointed by the person that ends up getting the front seat? Like, as a driver, you don't want to appoint things necessarily in the back of your mind. You have.

[Jeff]

No. Because there's some comfort in knowing that you're in the front seat no matter what, because you're driving. Hey, Sarah.

[Charlie]

Hey.

[Jeff]

Hi.

[Charlie]

Me and my sister, I'm 13 and my sister's 16, and we both do it all the time. What we do, though, is when we get out there, my dad will look at both of us and we'll both just be like, running towards the front seat. And there's been times where we fought each other in the garage. Like fist fights in the garage over the front seat.

[Jen]

Oh, totally. That is a very. Like Bert said, it's a very coveted seat. Because I know I am one of three children in my family, and it. Birthdays, like it was known. Every time your birthday came around, whatever you did that day, you always rode in the passenger seat as the kid. So I'm the youngest by far. So when I was in elementary school, my brother and sister were in high school and bullies. And so when it was my birthday, I was. I mean, I was like, walking all the way into the front seat, like, look at you. You all got a scrunch back in the back seat. Six, 16, 18 years old. And look at me, I'm the birthday girl. I'm in the passenger seat.

[Jeff]

Hey, Jen, you're on all the hits. Q100.

[Charlie]

Hey, yeah, me and my friends. I'm 22 and we still do it.

[Jeff]

Still at 20.

[Charlie]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

It never goes away. I think if you're 60 years old and you're driving away from the retirement home with your buddies in the car. Shotgun, shotgun. You're still doing rock, paper, scissors to see who gets the front seat?

[Charlie]

One of my friends calls shotgun. We'll call challenge, and then they'll do the Rock, paper, scissors, and you can challenge again. It goes on and on. I'm just like, come on, get in the car.

[Jen]

Oh.

You know, every time. Every time you're going out on the weekend, it's a group of you, and you're walking to the car. Everybody's got that mental thing going.

[Jeff]

Okay, who's gonna get it? Who's gonna get it?

[Charlie]

Exactly.

[Jeff]

It never goes away, man.

[Listener/Caller]

I tried that one time when I was getting arrested. I said shotgun, and it just.

[Jeff]

It didn't work.

[Listener/Caller]

Cop still put me in the back no matter what.

[Jeff]

Yeah, it didn't work. The Birch show, all the hits, Q100, and the Burt Show. Each one of us have adopted a high school football team to watch through the entire season. And for most of the people on the show this weekend, not such a great start to the football season. There was another big game going on, especially for us in studio. It was the Wheeler and Is it Harrison?

[Phil Turano]

The Hoyas. Harrison Hoyas at Kennesaw.

[Jeff]

All right. And, Phil, what was the bet that we all made on Friday?

[Phil Turano]

On Friday, we made the bet since Wheeler and the Hoyas kicked off their seasons Friday night. If the Harrison. If the Hoyas beat Wheeler and you.

[Jeff]

Went to Harrison Intern Jen, I am.

[Phil Turano]

A graduate and alum of 1997 of Harrison Hoya. If Harrison beat Wheeler, then me and one intern Jen would make out for 10 seconds on the air. Whereas if Wheeler would have beat Harrison, then I would have done an appearance, and intern Jen would have gotten every penny of my appearance fee.

[Jeff]

All right, that said, Intern Jen, what was the score of that Harrison Wheeler game?

[J]

Can I lie?

[Jeff]

No.

[J]

It was 18 0.

[Phil Turano]

19 0.

[J]

19 0.

[Charlie]

Whatever.

[Jeff]

And who won that game?

[J]

Harrison.

[Jeff]

Harrison won. Have you ever seen Phil Turano with a bigger smile on his face than he is right now?

[Phil Turano]

I think it's bragging rights more than anything. And on top of that, you know y' all all. And I wish Melissa was here for this, but y' all gave me so much crap on Friday about, oh, Jen's gonna sit there and go, come sit with me for just one quarter on the Wheeler side. Come sit with me. You can ask all of my Hoyas who are out there. I was with them the entire time. Despite the monsoon downpour, I stayed on the Hoya side the entire time. I only budged. And I stayed on the track to walk around and greet and meet some of the Wheeler cheerleaders and Then I walked back around.

[J]

Yeah, he got a few phone numbers, too.

[Producer Tracy]

Just trying to make him jealous. Make her jealous.

[Phil Turano]

And while I was standing there, one intern, Jen, did pull the puppy dog eyes the bottom lip out. Hey, would you come sit with me just for one quarter? Nope, Just. I just sit with you.

[Producer Tracy]

And why did you do that?

[J]

Little did he know that Jeff had sent me a text message saying, if I got Phil on my side for a quarter, I got 50 bucks.

[Jeff]

Hey, Denise, you're on all the hits. Q100.

[Charlie]

Hey, this is Denise. I just wanted to tell everybody that Phil did a great job for the Harrison Hoyas. He stayed on our side most of the time, and he was so great with the crowd. So we loved him, and we can't wait to get him back.

[Jeff]

Did you get up and cheer and stuff?

[Phil Turano]

Oh, no, I was just talking to everybody and greeting everybody and hung out with the cheerleaders.

[J]

Signing autographs.

[Phil Turano]

Yes. That was, like you said, the whole. You know, felt like a rock star. All of a sudden. People were really excited. And I gotta think real quick. I gotta thank Ms. Gunter and everyone over at Harrison. They hooked me up with more. I got more Harrison gear Friday in 30 minutes by going back to Harrison and picking up a couple shirts. I got more gear in 30 minutes than I did for the entire four years I went to Harrison.

[J]

I would have to agree on that, too. I need to thank some people, too. Terry Henderson, Coach, center. They stocked me up with, I think I got, like, 15 T shirts, water bottles, cups, towels, everything.

[Jeff]

I need more Northview stuff, man. I need more Northview stuff. This is. This ain't right. I'm one of the few teams in here that actually won this weekend.

[Jen]

And brisket and competitive. She's got 15 shirts. Well, I could have 16 Northview shirts.

I'll wear them.

One on each arm.

[Jeff]

All right, intern Jen, these are the parameters of the bet you. It's 10 seconds. Okay?

[J]

I've got my stopwatch on, so you guys can't take it any longer. I've got it set to 10 seconds already.

[Jeff]

If you break lips at all in that 10 seconds, and that means laughing or giggling or you break lips at all, then we restart the clock. Oh, God. It has to be a legitimate 10 seconds.

[Producer Tracy]

And I don't want any of this.

[Jeff]

Don't screw it up, because you're gonna.

[Jen]

Have to do this five times.

[Producer Tracy]

I don't want any of this. You know, leaning in. Give Grandma a kiss at the end of the visit. Kiss either. What do you want? I want you Cleaning his molars.

[Jeff]

Oh, Internet kiss, man.

[Phil Turano]

Since you put it that way, boy, it just gets more enticing.

[Jeff]

Jeff suggested that you take your watch off, and you have to try and guess when your 10 seconds is up. And if you break your lip lock before 10 seconds, you go all over again.

[J]

Okay. I don't know if I can count while I'm doing that, but okay.

[Jeff]

Okay, I've got the official clock over here.

[Jen]

Oh, dear.

[Jeff]

Don't look at me like that. This is Wheeler's fault, man. You got shut out.

[J]

I know.

[Producer Tracy]

I wouldn't be worried till you hear the bet that I'm thinking up for Walton versus Wheeler.

[Phil Turano]

Oh, God, I feel like such an eighth grader all of a sudden. I'm red in the face. I'm nervous.

[Jeff]

How many times you brush your teeth this morning?

[Phil Turano]

26 times.

[Jen]

You know what I thought that Phil would do? I thought Phil would be like, oh, you know what? I don't even want to kiss.

[Jeff]

I don't even want if it's gonna be like that. Like, I thought he would come in. Not a chance. Are you kidding?

[Producer Tracy]

He's got to get it how he can.

[Phil Turano]

I'm happy anyway. I can get it. I do know she's nervous, so I just want to do this and get it over with, and hopefully somebody will laugh and we'll have to do it and get it over with again.

[Jeff]

All right, producer Tracy, you've got the digital camera.

[J]

Wait, we're doing it now?

[Jeff]

Oh, we're doing it right now, sister. It's going down. We can go to commercials or something, dude. Right now. Right here, right now.

[Phil Turano]

Okay, well, we can take a practice run through the commercials and then come back and do it live at. You want to.

[Jeff]

You want to do a 30 second kiss before we get into the legitimate 10 second one?

[J]

No, let's do this.

[Jeff]

Oh, God.

[J]

Where?

[Phil Turano]

What do you mean, where?

[Jen]

Phil, this is where you take the lead, honey.

[Jeff]

Yeah, man.

[Producer Tracy]

All right.

[Phil Turano]

I even took my glasses off because she's always saying she hates me wearing my glasses.

[Jeff]

All right, I got the official clock over here, y'. All.

[Producer Tracy]

I love it.

[Jeff]

And intern Jen, once again. You break lips, we start all over again.

[Jen]

Phil, it's your turn now, buddy.

[Jeff]

Go make it happen, boy. Get up in there.

[Phil Turano]

All right, y' all safe?

[Producer Tracy]

Can you play the music again?

[Phil Turano]

Yeah, I'll say. Go.

[Chad]

Let's get it all.

[Producer Tracy]

Three, two.

[Jeff]

They're like eighth graders one into it, man. Kiss. Oh, it started.

[Producer Tracy]

Hold on, hold on. Stop kissing.

[Jen]

Hold on.

[Producer Tracy]

Seriously?

[Jeff]

Why?

[Producer Tracy]

The batteries in the camera died.

[Jeff]

Oh, are you serious? Are you serious?

[Producer Tracy]

We gotta get new batteries for the camera.

[Jeff]

Oh, come on now.

[J]

You did that on purpose, Jeff.

[Producer Tracy]

No, I didn't. I really didn't know they were dying.

[Jeff]

That was only five seconds. So you own five more. Get batteries for the. And I am impressed with Phil. Serena going both hands to the back of the head and bringing her in.

[Producer Tracy]

Mommy knows she's gonna try to escape.

[Phil Turano]

I was locking her in. Couldn't see. I had my. Her ankle was locked in. Mine too.

[Jeff]

Gotta get her to a full Nelson, man. Jen is beat red right now. She had to break. So we gotta start all over again with 10 seconds.

[Producer Tracy]

Yeah, I'm sorry about that, guys. You're welcome.

[Phil Turano]

I got here at 4:30 this morning and changed all the batteries and all the digital cameras.

[Jeff]

All right, so can we get. Can we get batteries here in the next couple of minutes?

[Producer Tracy]

We'll try.

[Jeff]

Oh, we gotta wait.

[Producer Tracy]

We'll do what we can.

[Jeff]

All right, Phil, Intern Jen, let's do this.

[Producer Tracy]

Sorry about the first time, guys.

[Phil Turano]

Really, Jeff, I don't appreciate that at all. Not at all.

[J]

Yeah, Jeff.

[Jeff]

And once again, for those of you that weren't listening, this is the payoff to the Harrison and Wheeler bet. Intern Jen went to Wheeler and they lost to Harrison this weekend. And they had a side bet going on.

[J]

You guys had the best bet. We didn't make this bet. You guys made.

[Jeff]

And Wheeler lost to Harrison. So intern Jen owes filter in a 10 seconds of a lip lock right here.

[J]

So we can start at the five seconds that are left, right?

[Sarah Gibson Tuttle]

No.

[Jeff]

And again, if you break lips because you're laughing or giggling or whatever, it starts all over again.

[Sarah Gibson Tuttle]

Okay?

[Jeff]

All right. Go get her. Go get her, boy. Go get her.

[Producer Tracy]

Filmmaking, huh?

[Jen]

Flipping the hat around backwards so the bill doesn't get in the way.

[Producer Tracy]

Hey, Phil, can we get a thumbs up?

[Jen]

He's swaying.

[Producer Tracy]

Intern Jen, can we get a thumbs up?

[Jeff]

Go get him, man.

[Producer Tracy]

Three, two, one, kiss.

[Chad]

Damn those guys.

[Jen]

That's a good one.

[Jeff]

Oh, they both got their hands like on each other. Back of the head. Damn. Yeah, that was 15. I forgot.

[Producer Tracy]

That was nice. I think Jen needs a pregnancy test. Like, did you.

[Jeff]

A little more sensual than I thought it was going to be. A little on the uncomfortable side of this thing.

[Jen]

Producer Tracy, did you get a good picture?

[Jeff]

Oh, yeah. Up on the website. Later on@AllTheHits Q100.com. Get it. The bird show. When the flu is keeping you up at night, don't try to tough it out. Knock out your flu symptoms with NYQUIL Intense Flu. You got this. It provides powerful relief of your flu symptoms so you can sleep well through the night. NYQUIL Intense Flu the nighttime Sniffling aching aching fever Best sleep with flu medicine Use as directed. Keep out of reach of children.

[Charlie]

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[Jeff]

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[Jen]

When you book a vrbo, you don't have to reserve any loungers, they're all yours. Get that early booking [e-mail].