The Bert Show – Full Show PT 3: Tuesday, February 17 [Vault]

Original Air Date: February 17, 2026
Summary of Content (excluding ads and sponsor segments)

Episode Overview

In this segment, The Bert Show brings together the cast and listeners to tackle real-life relationship dilemmas, social etiquette debates, and honesty in daily life, all with their trademark playful banter and authenticity. Key topics include advice for a listener in love with his roommate, a dispute over restaurant tipping protocol, and a collective challenge to count their own daily lies.

1. Listener Dilemma: "I'm in Love with My Roommate"

(Starts ~02:02)

Key Discussion Points

• Brandon's Dilemma:
  Brandon calls in to share that, after two years as roommates with a woman, he realizes he’s fallen in love with her. He worries about destroying their friendship if he reveals his feelings.

  • “I find her attractive. I guess she finds me attractive, but…she’s always had a boyfriend…It started as a crush, but man, I really love this girl.” (Brandon, 02:05)
  • He notes he often compares other women to her.

• Recognizing the Signals:
  The female hosts list classic "is she into you" signals for Brandon to observe:

  • Cuddling or sitting close (03:03)
  • Leaving her door cracked open (03:06)
  • Wearing cute pajamas (03:11)
  • Displaying good posture or "accentuating her booty" (03:19)

• Observations and Interpretation:
  Brandon shares a new incident: while watching TV, his roommate stretches out and puts her legs across his lap.

  • “She stretched out and she put her legs on my lap.” (Brandon, 04:46)
  • Debate ensues: is this intimacy or just extreme comfort between close friends?
    • “Would you do that with a guy friend if you thought there’s no way he’s interested in you?” (Melissa, 05:00)
    • “If you were just overly comfortable on the friend side, I think I would. So I don’t know that if that one’s as clear as we think…” (Melissa, 05:20)

• Advice from Listeners:
  Amy calls to share she married her roommate in a similar situation.

  • "If he had not have told me, I never would have done it.” (Amy, 08:17)
  • She recommends being honest, but the hosts discuss subtle ways to test romantic interest.

• Game Plan Brainstorm:

  • The hosts suggest an all-day, one-on-one activity (like a trip to the aquarium, art museum, Braves game, or even a day trip to Chattanooga) as a "non-date date".
    • “You gotta do something bold. A little bit more, I think, than dinner.” (Host, 12:07)
    • “The whole point is for him to find out if she’s into him or not. So not to dance around it to where it takes forever and she ends up dating somebody else.” (Wendy, 14:02)

• Comic Relief:
  The hosts jokingly suggest extreme measures like “Just drop your pants to your ankles” or “Naked on the couch” to lighten the tension (14:16).

2. Tipping Debate: The Restaurant Receipt Incident

(Starts ~15:30)

Key Discussion Points

• What Happened:
  A friend, Dylan, picks up the check for a group dinner (~$140) and leaves a $14 tip (10%). The server crosses out the $14, replaces it with $28 (20%), and submits it.

• Panel Responses:

  • “That's kind of a middle finger right there.” (Melissa, 17:50)
  • Hosts are split:
    • Is it ever OK for a server to alter a tip after the fact without telling the customer?
    • Is a 10% tip justifiable if no complaints were voiced about service?

• Restaurant Worker Call-ins:

  • Amy (caller): her Atlanta restaurant adds 18% tip for parties of 5+ but emphasizes, "Once they sign something, you can't go back and add it. That's ridiculous." (Amy, 19:54)
  • Vince (caller): his girlfriend's son was fired for just highlighting a tip—any post-signature alteration is a firing (and possibly legal) offense. "He got let go from Taco Mac because he…highlighted what the customer had put down, which is illegal for them to do." (Vince, 20:36)
  • Lee (caller): “If the server…added it on there, that's actually credit card fraud.” (Lee, 22:03)

• Consensus:

  • Restaurants can require gratuity if they disclose it—but servers must not alter tips after signing.
    • "As long as you disclose it, you can add whatever you want. You can charge somebody for using a fork…as long as it’s on the menu." (Jeff, 22:34)

3. The "Lie Counting" Challenge

(Starts ~22:45)

Key Discussion Points

• The Challenge:
  The cast agrees to spend 24 hours tracking all lies they tell—big, small, and by omission.

  • “We all made an agreement…we were all gonna go 24 hours and write down the little lies that we tell.” (Host, 22:45)

• Types of Lies Defined:

  • White lie: minor, often to spare feelings.
  • Big lie: outright falsehood with no truth.
  • Exaggeration: stretching the truth.
  • Omission: leaving out relevant information.

• Predictions:
  Each cast member guesses how many lies they'll tell:

  • Jeff: 7 (“I’d like to say seven. Seven is my number.” – 26:01)
  • Wendy: 9
  • Melissa: 12 (“I’m good at the omission one.” – 26:27)
  • Host: 10

• Debate Over What Counts:

  • Is ignoring a call and saying “I missed your call” a lie? The cast says yes.
    • “If she says, how come you didn’t pick up when I called before, and I say, I didn’t even realize that you called…that’s a bold face lie.” (26:36)
  • Even pressing “ignore” on a call when available is deemed a lie.
    • “That’s technically a lie, right?” (Jeff, 27:56)

• Purpose:
  To spark honesty and self-awareness; the cast will report back tomorrow (“You gotta write down all day long today what the lies were and bring them to the table tomorrow.” – 26:53).

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Brandon on Roommate Love:
  “If I don’t say something, then she’s gonna steal her [sic]. At first, I think it was more of just a crush…But, man, I really love this girl, but I’m afraid that I don’t want to blow the friendship.” (02:18)

• On Boldness in Relationships:
  “I think you eventually have to tell her how you feel. But at least I think these are signs that she’s not going to…kind of reject you harshly.” (Wendy, 05:28)

• On Tipping Ethics:
  "If the service is so bad…then you almost leave 10% to make a point, but I can't imagine ever leaving less than 15% for no reason." (Jeff, 17:54)

• On Lying in Daily Life:
  “If your phone rings and you let it go to voicemail, but you’re available to talk, is that a lie?” (Jeff, 27:27)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Listener Romance Story & Advice: 02:02 – 14:21
• Tipping/Restaurant Receipt Debate: 15:30 – 22:44
• Lie Counting Challenge: 22:45 – 28:10

Conclusion

This episode of The Bert Show blends heartfelt listener dilemmas and relatable life situations with practical advice, candid self-reflection, and the cast’s lively humor. The relationship advice segment balances empathy with playfulness, while the tipping debate offers real-world lessons in social norms. The honesty challenge leaves listeners ready for tomorrow’s follow up on who told the most lies.

If you're seeking an episode that wraps authenticity, support, and light-hearted amusement into your morning, this one's a recommended listen.