Katie (1:53)

But if you're gonna stop that, you have to come up with one line that ends it. Saving their feelings, but protecting you from having to avoid that person in the future.

Melissa (2:01)

Hey, Tracy.

Tammy (2:02)

Hey. Hey. Hey. Okay, so here's my beef. It's one thing. It's like. And I'm gonna preface, I'm married now and whatnot, but I lived in New York for a while, so I actually did the sex in the city kind of thing. And I dated quite a bit. And it got to the point where if I spent all my time going, why? Why didn't I Get a second date or why didn't I get a third date? You know, it's a waste of time. It's just, you know, it's a whole, like, if he's. If he's really not that into you kind of thing. There's some truth to that. And I do believe that honesty is the best policy. And it's not that you say, oh, look, sorry, no, I'm not going to call you. But as women, we need to get the hint that if we don't get the call back or if we don't get a text, it's like, move on. It's not like there's not 50 million other men out there that might be your perfect match. Because when we sit there and want all this closure and stuff, to the degree it makes us look like stalker women, it gives women a further bad name that, you know, we can't be strong, that we don't need men or that we, you know, we have to have men. And it's just like. Just get the clue. It's, you know, so he didn't call. I know it sucks, but just move on. And as guys, it's like, don't say you're gonna do something if you're not gonna do it. Don't say, hey, I'll give you a call if you're not gonna do it.

Melissa (3:10)

So what would you rather?

Tammy (3:12)

Have a great time. Thanks.

Melissa (3:13)

What would you rather say?

Tammy (3:14)

That I think it's up to us. I mean, we're all adults. Sometimes you just. I mean, people need to get a better clue.

Katie (3:21)

So what's the line? Yeah, because what we're looking for is the line at the end of the date, the guy or the girl says, hey, I'd really love to see you again. What is the proper line?

Tammy (3:31)

You just. I have to admit there, I'm not quite sure either, unfortunately. I mean, I think. Honestly. Yeah, you just. You just say honestly, hey, look, I had a great time. Thanks. And you just. You don't.

Katie (3:43)

I don't want to see her anymore.

Tammy (3:47)

I mean, fortunately, nobody wants to be the bad guy, but we're adults. People can't always be that clueless that. I mean. Yes, I have. I had several dates where I thought it went really well, and I never got a call back. And then there's times where, like, a guy thought we had a great date and he's calling and whatnot, and it's just like, dude, gotcha. You know?

Melissa (4:05)

Thank you.

Jeff (4:05)

I had a friend in New York who. She a friend of a friend who's he said good luck at the end of the date.

Tammy (4:15)

Good luck.

Jeff (4:17)

So see, don't you wish you could sign it off like on an email? Like when people just write best and then put their name like you wish you could say something like that.

Melissa (4:26)

Like, I'm with.

Jeff (4:27)

Sincerely, I would rather.

Melissa (4:29)

I would rather not know, to be honest with you, and just. I would rather have you not text me and not call me. I'll get it within two days. If I don't get anything back in two days, it's over anyway. I don't want to know what I did wrong or what you interpret. Why I'm not for you. That's it.

Katie (4:45)

We're talking about. We're talking about the after effects. I think we're looking for the line,

Jeff (4:52)

but I honestly don't think there'll ever be one. I think we're all adults, whatever, we're all grown people who still have the emotions of a 10 year old. I mean, that's how life is. And I think that what Bert is saying and actually what that last caller was saying is the only realistic thing is you just have to get the clues. Like you have to get it and.

Katie (5:11)

But then you have an awkward run.

Jeff (5:11)

Too many people don't. Because you like the person. You want to go out with them again. But guess what? It's not gonna happen.

Katie (5:16)

Especially if it's a friend situation, mutual friends. And you have the awkward run into them again. There should there. There needs to be a line that can be used that is, I would really love to see you again. And then. You know what? I don't think we hit it off. You know what? You had a big old chunk of lettuce in your teeth.

Jeff (5:36)

I used to do that with somebody they just knew.

Katie (5:37)

Then we need to find a different line.

Melissa (5:39)

I don't think it works. I don't think we're gonna find the right line because it also seems too brutal.

Jeff (5:44)

It all seems too mean to say.

Katie (5:46)

Terrible oral hygiene. Really? No, I just don't think we hit it off.

Melissa (5:49)

Hey, amber, you're on Q100.

Katie (5:51)

That's what you should do. It's the bird theory. You weigh oversell it over to it.

Jeff (5:56)

Okay.

Katie (5:56)

Why? I don't think we should see each other anymore on account of you being really fat and having bad hair. Oh, my God. What?

Melissa (6:01)

Just kidding.

Katie (6:02)

Yeah, just kidding. I just didn't think you and I connected.

Melissa (6:05)

Hey, amber, you're on Q100.

Tammy (6:07)

Well, ironically, I had a really similar situation happen to me, except it was a guy that wouldn't quit talking on the date. I was set up on a blind date, and I don't think the guy asked me three questions about myself, and it just was obnoxious. And I thought, you know, if this guy isn't genuinely interested in me, then I don't want a second date. And he called me. He's very persistent. IM me, text me. And I finally just stood up and returned his text. I was very respectful, and I said, look, I had a good time, but. And here's the line. I just got out of a serious relationship, and I'm not looking for anything right now. It was a little stretch of the truth, but it was. It was the truth.

Melissa (6:43)

Okay, then as the one that. Then as the one that's out with you, I'm thinking, then why are we here in the first place?

Tammy (6:49)

Well, it was a blind date. I was set up by a good friend, and I. I just wanted to go out and have a little fun. You never know who you're gonna meet. I mean, I feel like sometimes if a friend says, you should meet somebody, then you should always take the chance. But it just didn't work out.

Jeff (7:02)

Well, girls have already used that line for a long time. I don't want to be in a serious relationship, but just get. We. We've used that. All women have lied about it. I think the thing going on, what Jeff is saying, it will never work because nobody will take the line. Like, if you say, I just don't think it's gonna work out. Why? Well, what I do. Well, what can I do better? Like, the other person? Like, it's never gonna be clean break, because no two people are ever on the same page about anything.

Katie (7:26)

Maybe you just go completely nuts, though. You go, let me see your palm. And then you look at the lines and go, dear God, you and I are not. See how your stratus line crosses the omega line at the heart point. Look at mine. You see how that. That's clearly not. I don't even know how we survived this dinner.

Jeff (7:43)

I think it should be the soap opera thing where you just walk out. You just say no goodbye. You just turn around and walk out.

Melissa (7:47)

This is what John Mayer said about the breakup with Jennifer Aniston. And I wonder if there's any grain in here at all that you could use, but not to somebody's face on a first date, though.

Tammy (7:56)

Jennifer Aniston is the smartest, most sophisticated person I think I've ever met. And people are different. People have different chemist. They have different lives. It's not about Years. It's about going out with somebody, being truthful on the way in, being truthful in the middle.

Katie (8:09)

Imagine this first date.

Tammy (8:11)

You're either a cheater or you break up. And I'm not the first.

Melissa (8:14)

There's nothing really in there.

Katie (8:16)

Imagine the end of a first date, and you say the person by name. You know what? Wendy Adams is the most serious and smartest person that I know. And sometimes there's chemistry, and sometimes. And Wendy's like, dude, we went to Starbucks.

Jeff (8:30)

We just had coffee.

Katie (8:31)

We had coffee and shared a piece of pound cake, you freak.

Melissa (8:34)

Trey, you're on Q100.

Tammy (8:35)

I. Yeah, yeah. I'm married now, and I've been married for a little over a year, but I went to the dating game for about two years with several different avenues and girls that just don't return your phone calls for no reason. And it just gets to the point where you want a reason. And I think I came up with it. You basically just have to say that, you know, look, we're both adults. We know that this really didn't go that well. I don't want to be mean to you. I don't want to lead you on. Let's just keep it at that and move on. And maybe you'll find somebody. Maybe I'll find somebody later on.

Melissa (9:03)

I just rather not even have the

Jeff (9:04)

courage to do that. I don't think anybody has the courage to do that. The courage to do that. And you say it didn't go well for the other person. It might. And I must say, I think it's hilarious that every caller or the majority of our callers, they're weighing in on this, want us to know that they're married. I don't know what the. I don't know what the purpose of letting us know they're married is, but I was in the dating. A lot of people have said that.

Melissa (9:23)

I've told you before that I never became. I never had better perspective on dating than on the day that I got married. I figured dating out so well. I got all the answers now that I'm married.

Katie (9:34)

What about.

Jeff (9:35)

Maybe that's it. I just felt like they just wanted to let us know that I'm legitimate because, you know, now I've done something. I'm successful because I'm married, however. Right, Exactly.

Katie (9:43)

What about if the way you do it is like you leave the date and let whatever happens happens, but then as soon as you get home, you call the person you're on a date with and say, let me ask you a Question about our dinner tonight. Did you poop your pants a little bit on the ride home and then when they go, no, of course not go. I did.

Melissa (10:01)

Unless if the other person wants that, then they'll go, yeah, actually, I did. Hey, mark, you're on Q100. Hi.

Tammy (10:10)

Hey. How's it going?

Melissa (10:11)

What's up, man?

Tammy (10:13)

Hey. For me, when I was dating, I just kept it simple, you know, hey. They were like, hey, I'd like to see you again. Yeah, you know, maybe I will. Maybe we will hang out again sometime. That would be nice. Then it kind of leaves it open to. If you're not pinned down. But it kind of leaves it open to, hey, well, we'll call or we'll hang out with a bunch of friends. But you kind of put in that friendly vibe.

Melissa (10:38)

Why are we making this so complicated now? Dating now is set up to be so easy. You go on group dates, you're allowed to text each other and email as conversations. It's all so much easier now. So why are we complicating things with a. With a conversation to end it when it should just be a breastfeed? Just don't call.

Katie (10:55)

You should send a three letter text code that doesn't make any sense and then never contact them again.

Melissa (11:00)

Rnt.

Jeff (11:01)

Yeah, did.

Melissa (11:03)

Hey, the Birch Show.

Tammy (11:07)

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Jeff (11:09)

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Tammy (11:11)

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Jeff (11:19)

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Tammy (11:25)

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Jeff (11:29)

So you can just sit back, get paid, and make room for things that actually feel like you. And with 10,000 new arrivals every single day from top designers like Prada, Celine, Louis Vuitton, and Loewe, all for up

Tammy (11:42)

to 90% off retail, you're bound to find something perfectly on brand to fit that extra closet space with.

Jeff (11:48)

Plus, right now you can get an

Tammy (11:50)

extra $100 to shop. When you sell for the first time, make room for what feels like you go to therealreal.com to start selling and get your extra hundred dollars to keep shopping@therealreal.com that's therealreal.com terms apply.

Melissa (12:09)

All right, Wendy, who is Josie and why are we talking to her again this morning?

Tammy (12:12)

Josie is married and decided to ask her husband to take over. The financials included some of the stocks that they had in the stock market. Well, Josie was supposed to go to a couple of classes about finance and learn about it and never checked up on the stocks.

Jeff (12:28)

And her husband actually asked her to get out of the stock market before

Tammy (12:32)

it crashed, and she didn't do that.

Melissa (12:33)

She didn't do that. So she didn't go to the classes, didn't pull the money out. Been lying to him now for weeks. And last night was payday. She had to talk to her husband last night about everything that she's been doing and tell him that they've lost a ton of cash. Hi, Josie.

Tammy (12:50)

Hi, guys. How are you?

Melissa (12:53)

That feels like the verbal version of the dog with the tail between his legs right there.

Tammy (13:01)

So I had the talk, and you guys were right. He had taken care of it without telling me.

Jeff (13:11)

Knew it.

Tammy (13:12)

He did. I can't believe you guys had more insight into my husband than I did.

Melissa (13:17)

Melissa was right on top of that.

Jeff (13:18)

Well, I just feel like I was thinking my own relationship and, like, you know, Katie and I know each other's weaknesses and our strengths, and I think that if there was something Katie didn't trust me with but asked me to do, she would check on her own, you know, behind my back, just to make sure it got done if it was something that important, like with money. So that's why I assumed your husband

Melissa (13:35)

did the same thing even before you found out. I want to take this from, like, the prequel before you found out that he was taking care of things. I want to know what your day was like yesterday, how you approached him, how you approached him yesterday, where you sat him down. What were you feeling when you sat him down? And then I want to know exactly how he broke it to you that he'd taken care of things.

Tammy (13:59)

Okay, well, yesterday was horrible, as you can imagine. I was, like, sick to my stomach all day long. And he got home last night around seven or so, and I couldn't do anything else except have the conversation. So I didn't beat around the bush. I said, there's something we have to talk about. Come sit in the living room. Sat him down. I was shaking. Like, literally my hands were shaking.

Melissa (14:32)

He must have known at that point what was coming up. So when you said, we need to go sit down and talk, did he. Did his face say anything to you? Did he give away anything?

Tammy (14:41)

Well, I was so nervous that I wasn't even really paying that much into him, but he didn't give anything away at that point. He seemed like, okay. And so I was like, Crying a little bit, shaking. And I was telling the story. And at first. First he. You know, he was like, trying. Trying to make this mad face, like, trying to keep it, you know, mad. And then he just kind of broke down into a smile and he's like, okay, you can relax a little bit. Stop crying. Stop crying. Just relax. You know, you're not off the hook. But I had a feeling, you know? So I checked into things. I sold some stocks in August. Yeah, at the end of August, he said. And then he said, you know what this means? And I said, what? That I'm not allowed anywhere near the money? And he said, exactly. No more handling the finances ever, ever, ever. I'm in charge of everything.

Jeff (15:50)

And how do you feel about that? Do you feel relieved that he's taking it back, or do you feel like some kind of.

Tammy (15:56)

To be honest, yeah.

Melissa (15:58)

At that point, she lost all leverage in the negotiation at all. So I was probably relieved that she doesn't have to handle any of it.

Jeff (16:05)

Right. But the thing is, now, like, your husband thinks you're completely irresponsible. You gotta do some things to earn his respect back again. Well, she is. No offense, Josie, but, I mean, the class. You went to class once and you didn't take it seriously. So with the finances, you were irresponsible.

Tammy (16:20)

Yes. No, I was. I was irresponsible. There is no question. That's why I'm relieved to have him take over. Because clearly I'm. I'm no good in this arena.

Melissa (16:32)

If the roles were reversed here, okay, and this was happening in my house first, Stacey would be crazy nuts that I didn't. I didn't do anything with the money. But the weeks of lying that led up to it, when I was leaving the house and she thought I was going to the finance classes, and I was lying to her face time and time again, I think she'd have a tougher time with that than anything else.

Tammy (16:55)

Okay, well, to be fair. To be fair, I haven't spilled the beans yet about not going to the finals.

Katie (17:03)

To be fair, who exactly are you being fair to right now?

Jeff (17:07)

How's that fair?

Melissa (17:10)

Oh, honey.

Jeff (17:11)

So he still thinks he went.

Tammy (17:13)

Barbara brought out the. Honey, I couldn't let it all out in one night.

Melissa (17:17)

One night.

Tammy (17:18)

One night. Rip it off.

Katie (17:20)

It's a band aid.

Tammy (17:21)

Just tear it off.

Melissa (17:22)

You gotta do it. So you gotta go back and. You going to do the whole thing again?

Tammy (17:26)

Well, I figured at this point, does it really matter?

Katie (17:32)

But what if he comes to you someday and he's got like your little portfolio or whatever it's called. And he's like, let me ask you a question. That finance class, what did they say was safer? CDs or treasury bonds?

Melissa (17:43)

Well, she could say, now, you know what? I messed this up so badly before. This is all you, hon.

Jeff (17:48)

I do want to ask, who paid for that class?

Tammy (17:53)

I mean, it came out of a household, but it was cheap. Yeah, I guess.

Jeff (17:58)

And I'm just curious, how much does a class like that cost?

Tammy (18:02)

I don't think very much. I think it was like $300 or something.

Jeff (18:06)

300, okay, so he spent three. Or you two. I'm sorry, as a couple, you spent $300 on a class you never went to. So maybe the fair thing is, you know, if you're not going to tell him, then maybe, I don't know, somehow to reimburse him that $300.

Tammy (18:21)

Oh, like, get him a. Like. Like book him a massage or something and then be like, right, bond in

Melissa (18:29)

his name or something. What do you guys think? That she should come clean with them now? About the second part of this or. Now that the worst part is over, Just go ahead and keep it a secret.

Jeff (18:37)

The fact that there's money attached, like, that's not cool.

Melissa (18:41)

You got to sit him down again, Jeff. What do you think? Sit him down again or just let it go?

Katie (18:45)

Let it go. Water under the bridge. Just talk and move. Don't say a word. And if it ever. If it comes up again, if he brings it up, the financial class go. Well, I've got another confession make. I didn't want to tell you this, blah, blah, blah, but I think it's probably six months from now he'll even forget you said you took it.

Melissa (19:03)

So you're saying full disclosures and marriages is overrated?

Katie (19:06)

No, because then you get the problem about lying to him. Where you were every single night you're supposed to be at the class. I don't know.

Jeff (19:14)

And why your nails and toes look so good, Wendy.

Melissa (19:20)

Does she go back and tell him that she lied about all the classes or just let it go?

Jeff (19:23)

I wouldn't, really. The right thing is.

Tammy (19:26)

Yeah, you should, but no, I wouldn't.

Jeff (19:28)

That's funny. Just let it ride.

Tammy (19:30)

Let it ride.

Jeff (19:31)

Give him his money. I mean, the bighow give it, drama's over. If you're not gonna tell him, give him his money back somehow. At least make it right for yourself.

Katie (19:39)

But you can pay back with a couple of.

Jeff (19:41)

You know, she don't want to make it run. How much you charge for each one of those.

Katie (19:45)

Jeff, I gotta see a picture of her.

Tammy (19:48)

Oh, geez.

Jeff (19:50)

Dante dollar.

Melissa (19:53)

All right, Josie, let us know how you handle it, all right? If you have the talk with them again, call us back the next day and let us know.

Tammy (19:59)

Okay?

Melissa (19:59)

Are your instincts now saying just let it go or you are you thinking you're going to have the talk?

Jeff (20:04)

My.

Tammy (20:05)

My instinct instincts are saying let it go.

Jeff (20:06)

She's not gonna tell him.

Melissa (20:07)

She's not gonna say, damn, she's gonna get the money. Not a damn word. Whatever, tell him. See you later. Bye bye.

Tammy (20:14)

Let it go.

Jeff (20:15)

She is consistent responsibility. I was fishing for a combo somewhere around there.

Melissa (20:23)

Wasn't there the third show. All right, I'm gonna tell you right now, brace yourself. This woman gets white hot mad. White hot mad. And I'm not sure where this happened, but it's a woman that obviously got in the way of either a police car or a fire truck on their way to an emergency. And they must have clipped her, okay? And she feels like the fire department or the police department should pay for that. And the police department says, look, did you hear the sirens? I mean, we're on our way to an emergency, so you should have known better. And she wants her money. She's demanding it. So she calls local 911 and she says, look, you guys need to pay because I'm not paying for this. You're the ones that run into me. Now, it starts off a little bit slow here, but it is gonna pick up steam and she is going to scare you. The first time I heard this, I jumped out of my seat. It scared me so much.

Jeff (21:22)

She's not getting the response that she wants. So, like the anger boils and boils.

Melissa (21:26)

You might say that.

Tammy (21:27)

Okay, yeah, you can tell me your version of what happened, but based on what I have. Yeah, well, learned from. Well, now I don't care what you learn from. I'm going to tell you the truth. And then what the trooper said, too. He was charged with reckless driving, if that suits you. No, ma', am, he was not. Well, he had to be because I got these papers. Well, I've got a copy of the highway patrol. He was not charged. Oh, how could he keep them going? I was in the left hand, see, he could have made a right hand turn. He's behind me. They won. But one car in that right hand turn. And I wasn't making a left hand turn. The light was red. I stopped. Well, he took around me on the left hand side, then made a right hand turn and hooked into my car. This car is going into the shop. They're ordering their parts. They told me to call them on Monday. Well, you might want to turn it into your insurance company. Oh, no, I'll not turn it into my insurance. Bull. I will not. I'm putting my car in there and you're fixing it. And it's going to be fixed. It's almost $600 damage done to the front end of it where he hooked into it, pulled it off. Well, Ms. Ferguson. No, I will not turn it into my insurance. You'll pay or you'll see the whole sit into court 100%. Well, that's your. Just get ready. No, it's not my priorities, George. You're going to pay it. Well, listen, I'm not going to argue with you any further. No, you don't have to argue with me. I'll call the state trooper right now. Well, that. That's fine. You do whatever you need to do. Now you're going to pay this.

Jeff (23:20)

Whoa. Wow. Wow.

Tammy (23:22)

You think I'll give up? Hell no, I won't give up. I'm mad now. This car's going in the shop no later than they get to park and you will be bill for it. I will not give in. I'm not the giving up kind. I will not give in. Not one inch. Prepare yourself to pay it. I don't have anything else to say to you. I've told you we're not going to pay the claim. You do whatever you need to do. Pay it or either go to court. Pay it.

Jeff (23:55)

I said pay it.

Melissa (24:00)

They're laughing at her now.

Tammy (24:02)

You think that I'm gonna give in. Not one inch am I gonna give in. I'll sue the damn fire department. Okay, well, I will sue the fire department. Bring a lawsuit in against them. Okay, well, that's fine. You. Wow.

Melissa (24:24)

No. They think they hung up on her.

Tammy (24:27)

You can't make her shut up.

Jeff (24:30)

Oh, no.

Tammy (24:30)

The car is going to be fixed. Then I'm suing a fire department. Borrow the money. Send a lawyer immediately.

Katie (24:42)

She's so kind.

Tammy (24:42)

Still saying you're not going to pay it.

Jeff (24:47)

I guess that's it.

Melissa (24:50)

She's not done.

Jeff (24:51)

I take it she's not a timeout parent. Jeez, my wow wow.

Melissa (24:58)

Literally scares me with the first time I heard it.

Jeff (25:01)

She goes from so calm to crazy but numbing. Wow.

Tammy (25:07)

Hell no.

Jeff (25:09)

I'm writing a check now. I'll pay it.

Melissa (25:10)

Damn.

Tammy (25:14)

Think I'll give up? Hell no, I won't give up.

Melissa (25:19)

Here's the one that scares you.

Jeff (25:26)

Damn.

Melissa (25:27)

She's calling 911. You know, they gotta be send a car over to that house immediately.

Katie (25:35)

Well, they just stand by because it's eventually gonna happen. So they're just driving around the neighborhood.

Jeff (25:39)

I think they should just cut her the check. Yeah. What year

Melissa (25:45)

give her the money, the first show.