Podcast Summary: The Bert Show
Episode: Vault: Are You Married To Your Soulmate?
Date: December 16, 2025
Host: Bert & Melissa, with callers
Podcast: The Bert Show by Pionaire Podcasting
Overview
This emotionally intense episode of The Bert Show explores the provocative question: Are you married to your soulmate? The hosts open the phones to listeners who candidly share stories about being in long-term marriages while feeling an undeniable soul connection with someone else. The discussion navigates feelings of longing, marital commitment, the notion of “the one,” and whether soulmates are real or a dangerous romantic myth. The hosts, Bert and Melissa, thoughtfully probe their callers and each other, digging into love, loyalty, infidelity, and the very nature of soul connections.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The “Soulmate” Philosophy (01:03–02:12)
- Bert introduces the core topic: Is there only one perfect person for each of us?
- “If you’re not with that one person, that’s sad because there’s somebody else out there better. Now: is anybody willing to admit that?” (01:03)
- The philosophical dilemma is set: Are many people married to someone who isn’t their “soulmate”?
2. Caller Stories: Torn Hearts & Real-Life Dilemmas
Caller 1: Married 17 Years, Soulmate Discovered Later (01:33–08:53)
- Caller 1 admits openly: “Absolutely. I’m married to someone who’s not my soulmate.” (01:33)
- Shares meeting her “soulmate” 4 years ago, well into her marriage:
- “As soon as I met him I knew he was the one... He did something deep inside that just blew my mind.” (01:36)
- She describes immediate, almost spiritual connection, not mere infatuation.
- Melissa challenges her: Is this genuine, or just marital boredom? (02:12)
- Caller insists her marriage was good, but this “soul touch” was unique.
- Admits to having an affair with her “soulmate.” The relationship didn’t continue, out of respect for her family.
- “I have to do what I have to do. But it’s torture no matter what.” (03:52)
- Empathy check: Bert reflects on the devastation if the roles were reversed.
- Melissa asks how she’d want her husband to handle the same situation:
- “I would be crushed... but since it’s happened to me... I’d want him to be happy, and I’d understand it.” (04:38)
- Bert and Melissa emphasize there’s “no defense” against a true soulmate, but question the logic and emotional impact.
- Melissa voices skepticism about “soulmate” theory:
- “The danger is... not taking responsibility… Some people with this theory disregard the people they’re with.” (06:25)
- Critiques the expectation that soulmate relationships require no work.
- Caller 1 suggests many are “incapable” of spiritual connection, but for some, “sometimes you’re too sensitive for your own good.”
- “I wish I didn’t feel the things that I did, but when someone touches your soul… you know.” (07:19)
- Bert thanks her for her vulnerability. (08:49)
Caller 2: Emotional Fidelity (08:55–16:10)
- Caller 2 (voice disguised), married 6 years, also claims to have found her soulmate while already married.
- “It’s not something you’re capable of understanding unless it happened to you.”* (09:01)
- Met her soulmate at work; have never been physically unfaithful, despite deep, mutual feelings.
- “We’ve discussed it… and decided we’re married, we have children, it’s not fair… We were married for better or for worse.” (10:55)
- Bert asks if they’ve discussed the soulmate connection openly:
- “He thinks you’re his soulmate as well?” “Oh, yeah.”* (10:59)
- She experiences longing, particularly when emotional needs aren’t met at home:
- “Sometimes when I’m with my husband… I think about this man.” (11:07)
- Melissa challenges whether soulmates must be intimate partners and questions fate: Wouldn’t the universe have put you together? (11:31)
- Caller has deep emotional intimacy with her soulmate:
- “I share every intimate detail of my life with this man.” (11:53)
- Bert brings up the concept of an “emotional affair.” (12:18)
- “What you’re doing is almost as betraying as sleeping with somebody else… that, to me, is a form of infidelity.” (13:04)
- Melissa flips the scenario: How would you feel if your husband was thinking of another woman? (13:16)
- Caller 2 emphasizes this wasn’t about seeking something missing, but a spontaneous connection.
- “It just kind of happens.” (13:29)
- Bert and Melissa discuss the agony of temptation and the “grass is greener” phenomenon:
- “It would be torturous if you actually found the thing you thought was perfect and couldn’t have it.” (14:20)
- “It’d be interesting to know if these soulmates would have been soulmates if they met outside their marriage.” (14:47)
- Caller 2 wishes she’d met her soulmate first. (14:54)
- Melissa: Questions our arrogance in knowing what’s perfect for us, and whether soulmates are always meant to be partners.
- Bert inquires if she once felt her husband was “the one.”
- Caller 2: “I think I did, until I experienced this man. It’s a totally different thing.” (15:42)
3. Host Reflections & Philosophical Debates
- Temptation and Boundaries:
“If I truly was in her situation and working with that person every day, I’d try to find another job.” — Melissa (16:13) - Rationalizations: Bert wonders if people justify seeking a soulmate as a way to excuse infidelity or dissatisfaction.
- Cynicism vs. Romantic Idealism:
Bert: “Maybe we’re just cynical.” (16:57) - Broader questions:
- Would a soulmate remain a soulmate after 17 years together?
- Are soulmates an arrogant human construct?
- Is the longing itself what makes these feelings so strong?
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- Caller 1: “He did something to my soul. He did something deep inside that just blew my mind.” (01:36)
- Melissa: “The danger in the theory of a soulmate is... not taking responsibility... Some people with the soulmate theory, they totally disregard the person they’re with.” (06:25)
- Caller 1: “When someone touches your soul, if you try to describe that… they look at you like you have four heads.” (07:19)
- Caller 2: “It’s not something you’re capable of understanding unless it happened to you.” (09:01)
- Bert: “What you’re doing is almost as betraying as sleeping with somebody else... that, to me, is a form of infidelity.” (13:04)
- Melissa: “If you knew your husband was laying there with you thinking about another woman, how would you feel?” (13:16)
- Caller 2: “I wish I would have met this man before I met my husband.” (14:47)
- Melissa: “There’s no waste in the universe... Whatever you’re doing right now, you were meant to do it, or you wouldn’t be doing it.” (15:19)
- Caller 2: “I think I did [think my husband was the one] until I experienced this man. It’s a totally different thing.” (15:42)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- 01:03: Intro to “soulmate” philosophy and show call-in topic
- 01:33–08:53: Caller 1: Admits being married but not to soulmate; affair; pain; empathy discussion
- 06:25–08:49: Melissa’s critique of soulmate theory and emotional responsibility
- 08:55–16:10: Caller 2: Emotional soulmate at work; handling temptation; emotional fidelity; philosophical debate
- 13:04–15:19: Bert and Melissa challenge the “soulmate” narrative, emotional affairs, and what fate means
- 16:13–16:57: Host reflections on temptation and what happens after the soulmate fantasy fades
Tone and Style
The conversation is frank, compassionate, and probing. The hosts maintain a balance between empathy and skepticism, while callers provide raw, heartfelt perspectives. Through vulnerability, debate, and healthy cynicism, the cast delves into the complexities of love, loyalty, and what it means to yearn for a soulmate.
Summary prepared for listeners seeking a detailed account of this episode’s debates, emotions, and philosophical quandaries.
