Vault: Ghost Hunters - Part Two

Summary

The Bert Show – Vault: Ghost Hunters – Part Two

Date: November 24, 2025
Host: Bert Show Cast (Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, et al.)
Guest: Patrick Burns, ghost hunter and paranormal investigator

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Episode Overview

This episode continues the Bert Show’s deep dive into ghost hunting with renowned investigator Patrick Burns. The conversation navigates the fascination with the paranormal, the intricacies of investigating haunted locations, personal experiences, and a breakdown of recent home investigations involving the show's cast. The tone remains curious, skeptical, and lightly humorous throughout, balancing skepticism with open-minded exploration.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Human Fascination with Ghosts and the Paranormal

• Patrick Burns: The intrigue surrounding ghost hunting stems from our curiosity about "the last great mystery of mankind"—what happens after death (01:26).
  • “It’s really…one of the last great mysteries of mankind. You know, what happens to us after this life?” — Patrick Burns [01:26]
• Burns emphasizes how seeking knowledge beyond traditional religious teachings inspires many to investigate paranormal phenomena. (01:38)

Physical Harm from Ghosts

• Listener Question: Can ghosts physically harm people?
• Patrick Burns: Physical harm by ghosts is extremely rare, if possible at all.
  • Shares a personal anecdote about mysterious scratches after investigating a local Atlanta cemetery—scratches that couldn’t be easily explained by logical causes.
  • Most reported “injuries” are indirect—people get startled, trip, and injure themselves, rather than being directly attacked. (02:11 - 04:02)
  • “Most instances where somebody is, quote, unquote, injured by a ghost…what usually happens is somebody turns around, they see grandmother standing there, and they freak out, they stumble, they might trip and fall down the stairs. So it’s more of a secondary reaction than it is the ghost pushed you down the stairs.” — Patrick Burns [03:40]

Skepticism and Scientific Method in Ghost Hunting

• Patrick Burns’ Approach: Focuses on ruling out logical explanations before considering paranormal causes. He approaches ghost hunting as a hobby—not for profit—which helps maintain objectivity. (04:03-04:30)
  • “You have to rule out the logical explanation. First off…maybe there’s a hot water pipe that needs to be tied down, and there goes your ghost. Your ghost is gone.” — Patrick Burns [04:30]
• Investigations are inconclusive when natural causes are ruled out, making unresolved mysteries the most interesting cases.

Dream Paranormal Locations & Investigations Abroad

• Burns hasn’t investigated outside the U.S. yet but lists dream locations: Tower of London, Rose Hall (Jamaica), Mayan ruins (Mexico), and even the Titanic.
  • “At some point, I’d love to put an audio recording device on the bow of the Titanic…see if, you know, can we actually record shipwrecks on the bottom of the ocean? Haunted. I’ve always wondered that.” — Patrick Burns [05:38]

Home Investigations with The Bert Show Cast

• Patrick Burns visited several show members’ homes with minimal equipment—primarily a digital voice recorder to capture Electronic Voice Phenomena (EVP). This device is commonly used for dictated memos but also captures unexplained voices not present during recording. (06:26)
  • Reference to the movie White Noise for mainstream exposure to EVP, though with “Hollywood exaggeration.” (06:39)

Results from the In-Home Investigations

• Bert’s House: No evidence found; Bert is “off the hook.” (07:50-08:11)
• Jen Hobby’s House:
  • An EVP was captured, though very faint. The location’s historical significance (site of Civil War battles/skirmishes) makes it a likely candidate for paranormal activity. (08:20-11:03)
  • The audio clip contains an indistinct sound that some think says “hi.”
    • “A lot of times, EVP is in the ear of the beholder.” — Patrick Burns [10:47]
  • The EVP is not clear, but it’s enough for Patrick to consider a follow-up.
• Melissa’s House: Long recording session produced interesting conversation and may have yielded subtle EVP, supporting the method of casual conversation during investigations. (11:21)

Methods and Philosophy in Paranormal Research

• Casual conversation often yields better EVP results than asking direct questions.
  • The team highlights the difference between “hearing what you want to hear” and actual capture of unexplained voices.
  • The psychological component of interpreting unclear sounds as meaningful is discussed lightly. (10:47)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "It’s really…one of the last great mysteries of mankind. You know, what happens to us after this life?" — Patrick Burns [01:26]
• “Most instances where somebody is, quote, unquote, injured by a ghost… what usually happens is somebody turns around, they see grandmother standing there, and they freak out, they stumble, they might trip and fall down the stairs. So it’s more of a secondary reaction than it is the ghost pushed you down the stairs.” — Patrick Burns [03:40]
• “You have to rule out the logical explanation. First off… maybe there’s a hot water pipe that needs to be tied down, and there goes your ghost. Your ghost is gone.” — Patrick Burns [04:30]
• “A lot of times, EVP is in the ear of the beholder.” — Patrick Burns [10:47]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:26] – Patrick on the mystery and appeal of ghost hunting.
• [02:11 – 04:02] – Discussion: Can ghosts do harm? Patrick’s personal experience with unexplained scratches.
• [04:03 – 04:30] – The importance of skepticism and logical elimination.
• [05:18 – 05:59] – Dream international investigations and ambitious ideas.
• [06:26 – 07:50] – Ghost hunting methodology and equipment in home visits.
• [07:50 – 08:11] – Results from Bert’s house: “unhaunted.”
• [08:20 – 10:47] – EVP found in Jen’s house. The debate about interpreting faint audio and the influence of suggestion.
• [11:01 – 11:21] – Historical significance and the link to possible paranormal phenomena in Atlanta homes.
• [11:21] – Melissa’s home: Best EVP sometimes during casual conversation.

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Summary

This episode offers an engaging and light-hearted yet thoughtful exploration of ghost hunting, balancing skeptical inquiry with genuine fascination. The cast and Patrick Burns discuss personal experiences, techniques for investigation, and the psychological nuances of perceiving the paranormal. While no definitive proof is found, the show concludes with an appreciation for the mystery, the thrill of investigation, and the value of open but critical thinking when exploring "what comes after."

Transcript

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[C]

The Birch show so Patrick Burns, we continue our talk with him. People are fascinated by this whole subject. Just because you can't see it normally, you can't feel it, you can't touch it. So I think it's this, just this wanting to get knowledge of the unknown.

[A]

Absolutely, absolutely. It's, it's really, it's one of the last great mysteries of mankind. You know, what happens to us after, after this life?

[C]

Well, it gives you confirmation that there is sure more than just being buried in the ground.

[A]

Absolutely, absolutely. And to me, and I think most people that get into ghost hunting, it's a spiritual thing, you know, beyond what mainstream religion teaches us. You know, here's what you're supposed to believe, here's what's written in the Bible, here's some actual evidence of an afterlife. And that is, that can be very strong from a spiritual perspective on your, your belief.

[C]

Hey, James. Good morning. You're on Q100.

[A]

What's going on fellas?

[C]

What's happening? My question is, can a ghost or a spirit physically harm you?

[A]

I hear this question asked me all the time. It is extremely, extremely rare if it, if it can even happen. I had an instance where I investigation in a cemetery and the cemetery is local here to Atlanta. It's, you know, there's almost, it's taken on a, an urban legend Persona almost because of the crazy stuff that goes on here. One of the things that people report is that they come out of this place with scratch marks on their body. And I'm okay, whatever, right? And I was taken by a small group to go and investigate this a couple of years ago. And I got home, you know, getting undressed, getting ready for bed, and I happen to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and there are scratch marks on my body. There's like four or five scratch marks on my arms, my torso, and my leg, and they're all going in the same direction. Okay. And, you know, people want. You know, the skeptic wants to dismiss it, say, oh, you just ran into a thorn bush. Well, no, normally a thorn bush encounter is something you remember because it's rather unpleasant. And, you know, I tried to recreate it. There's no way to scratch yourself like this through clothing. You know, anything that could inflict that would get caught on the fibers of your shirt or your clothing. But I think most instances, okay, if that was an injury, okay, they're very light scratch marks. They went away within a, you know, a couple of days. Most instances where somebody is, quote, unquote, injured by a ghost, if you look at it, if you look at the report, what usually happens is somebody turns around, they see grandmother standing there, and they. They freak out, they stumble, they might trip and fall down the stairs. So it's more of a secondary reaction than it is the ghost pushed you down the stairs.

[C]

Gotcha.

[D]

One thing about Pat, I mean, because I had seen Patrick speak a couple times at Dragon Con, and one of the things I liked about Patrick and am fascinated by hearing him talk is the fact that he comes from a skeptical point of view. Like he's saying he's trying to come at it from a scientific point of view. You can't prove it scientifically.

[A]

And so.

[D]

And he doesn't charge. And so I think that's one of the things I like about ghost towns is because it's a hobby and it's a fascination, but it's one that. That you're. You're not. You're willing to dismiss something that is not obviously paranormal.

[A]

Absolutely. Absolutely. You have to rule out the logical explanation. First off, you know, somebody says, well, I'm hearing this banging sound from. From. From behind our wall every night. I'm like, okay, well, you know, go in there and investigate a little bit. Maybe there's a hot water pipe that needs to be tied down, and there goes your ghost. Your ghost is gone. You know, we try to Rule out all the possible explanations first and then at the end of the day it's still inconclusive. But, you know, it becomes kind of an interesting mystery when you try to rule it out and you can't.

[C]

Then there are the gen hobbies who will force the issue and bang things and then pretend that it was a ghost that actually did it.

[A]

I wish.

[D]

Have you ever done any ghost hun outside of the country?

[A]

Not yet.

[D]

Not yet.

[A]

Not yet. There are a number of locations throughout the world that I would just, you know, pardon the pun, die to get into. Tower of London comes to mind. There's a place in Jamaica called Rose hall which has some really crazy stories. I'd love to go investigate the Mayan ruins in Mexico. And you know, at some point, I'd love to love to put an audio recording device on the bow of the Titanic, leave it down there for about a week and come back, let's see if, you know, can we actually record our shipwrecks on the bottom of the ocean? Haunted. I've always wondered that.

[C]

My bars set way lower than that. I just like to hear what's going on, like Claremont Lounge and what has happened there for the last hundred years or in the hotel. That's what I really want to know.

[D]

Even Patrick, you scared?

[A]

You.

[C]

Know, Patrick came over to our homes one by one a couple of weeks ago and he brings some recording equipment with him. But not like, like I thought you were going to come in with like this duffel bag of stuff and you were going to set up all this equipment. You're going to be there for seven hours. You had the headphones on, staring into a screen. Wasn't like that at all.

[A]

Well, we do that sometimes, you know, with obviously on my time constraints, I kind of had to do a very preliminary investigation. We walk in. Typically, one of my favorite pieces of equipment to use is a digital voice recorder. And these are typically used by students and business executives to record lectures and notes. And everything is stored digitally on this small pocket sized device. And you know, when you roll it back, you listen for audio, you listen for voices, extra voices from people that weren't present at the time the recording was made. We refer to that as evp, which stands for Electronic Voice Phenomena. There was a movie starring Michael Keaton about two years ago that came out called White Noise that dabbled in that. And, you know, first 20 minutes of that movie were pretty good up until the point where they explained what EVP is and how you record it. And then it just went downhill from There the creative got all Hollywood machine. Yeah, yeah, the. The Hollywood machine took over from there. But it did kind of bring EVP out of. Out of obscurity and make it more of a household word term. So that's what we were looking for. And I walked through each year homes with the digital voice recorder. I went to your home and I went to Melissa's and. And Jen's and got some activity in one ear.

[C]

All right, let's one by one ask him. Did you find anything in my house?

[A]

I think you're off the hook.

[C]

Okay. Nothing in my house.

[A]

Nothing apparently. Now it was a 20 minute recording session we did. And like I said that there, there's the repeatability factor. Just because I didn't get something the first time in there doesn't mean we.

[C]

You don't have to justify it to me. All I need to hear is that there's nothing in my house.

[A]

Okay. There's nothing in your house.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Your house is unhaunted. Right.

[C]

Was there anything in Jen Hobby's house?

[A]

Jen's house, I believe is where I picked up an EVP voice. Really?

[D]

Oh, Jen, Yes. Are you scared?

[A]

And her house was actually the one that I suspected might have some activity because it's in a very historical location.

[C]

So Happy.

[A]

And it's worth. I got something interesting in there and I think it's possibly worth. Worth another look. We recorded some audio. It's not the clearest audio that I've recorded.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

But I think there is something there.

[C]

You want me to play it right now?

[A]

Sure, let's go ahead and listen to it.

[C]

It's only three seconds long.

[A]

Okay. Yeah. For me, when I got into it, it was.

[C]

I heard somebody that. A ghost that sounds very much like you.

[A]

Yeah. It comes just before I say. You have to listen to it very carefully. You'll hear what I think says hi for me. When I got into it, it was.

[C]

Can't hear it there. Did you guys pick up on it? But Jen's gonna say, yeah, of course she heard it.

[A]

I heard it.

[C]

He said, hi, Jen, I'm happy to.

[A]

Be in your house.

[D]

I can't hear it.

[A]

Yeah. If you go in, Bert, actually further down in that file that I gave you there, I've actually isolated it later on.

[C]

Okay. I've got a shorter clip and then there's an isolated clip.

[A]

So let's play the shorter cl.

[C]

And again we're. This is right before you say the word.

[A]

Yes, I think. Yeah, it was.

[C]

Can't hear. Here's the isolated one.

[A]

It's right before I say it. Just sounds like static to me. Yeah, yeah, there's. I think there's something in there. It's not like I said, I apologize. It's not the clearest audio that I recorded, but there might be something there.

[C]

I know you want something to say like, get out.

[A]

You don't want that, but.

[C]

I can't hear it. Can you guys hear.

[A]

Sounds like it's going. Hi. It's so short. It was literally just before I said it. And maybe, maybe there's nothing there, but I would be interested to come back. Can we hear the long head clip again? For me, when I got into it, it was, it was just before I say it, I can't hear. It was.

[C]

Hi, Jen's like clear as day.

[A]

I hear it, I hear it a lot of times. EVP is in the ear of the beholder.

[C]

So now it would make sense to us that if there was any activity in any one of our homes. I think Jen's home is probably in more of a historical place than the rest of ours.

[D]

Well, I was going to ask you why you thought maybe it would be.

[A]

More in my home. Well, and that is again, the thing about Atlanta that I had said earlier is there's so much we don't really know what was in a lot of locations where your home is, which I think is on the east side of the city.

[C]

Right.

[A]

That is actually a little bit more historical. We know that part of the battle for Atlanta was fought there, that some of the Confederate troops were actually in that area and there were a lot of skirmishes and little, little battles that go on now. Also, Melissa, we did. I sat in, in your, in your rec room and we recorded for what was it about? Better part of an hour. We sat there and we just chatted. We chatted about our experiences and stuff that we have experienced. And a lot of times that's the way we record. Our best EVP is to just, instead of asking questions and waiting for a reply is to just carry on a casual conversation. And many times you get something, you get these voices that, that, that chime in the bird show.

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