The Bert Show: Vault - Her Parents Won't Allow Her To Celebrate Her 21st Birthday!

Original Air Date: February 11, 2026

Episode Overview

This episode centers on Catherine, a college student who’s about to turn 21 but faces resistance from her Southern Baptist parents about celebrating the milestone with the typical traditions, such as going out drinking. The Bert Show cast (Burt, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and more) discuss family expectations, generational divides, handling guilt and pressure, and possible paths Catherine could take to mark her birthday while balancing respect for her parents and her own desire for independence.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catherine’s Dilemma: Turning 21 Under Strict Parental Rules

• Catherine shares that her parents—particularly due to their Southern Baptist beliefs and a family history of alcoholism—are against her going out and celebrating her 21st birthday in the typical way ([00:01]-[00:57]).
• Living at home and being the oldest of four siblings, she feels added pressure to be a “good role model” ([00:23]), and her parents use their authority and the “our roof, our rules” philosophy ([01:10], [01:25]).

2. Parental Influence: Religion and Family History

• Therese probes into the religious aspect ([00:57]), with Catherine confirming their Southern Baptist background, noting the strictness especially regarding alcohol ([01:04]-[01:24]).
• Catherine's mom’s difficult experiences with an alcoholic parent also play a part ([01:50]), which leads her to feel her parents don’t trust her and expect her to mess up ([01:50]-[02:15]).

3. The Burden of Being the Oldest

• The other hosts express sympathy for Catherine as the oldest child, agreeing her siblings will likely get away with more in the future ([02:15]-[02:25]).

4. Possible Workarounds and Suggested Compromises

• Jim proposes a "don't ask, don't tell" approach: Catherine could spend the night out with friends, have her fun discreetly, and avoid direct confrontation ([02:36], [05:03]).
• Catherine considers this, knowing it isn’t foolproof but debating if enduring the parental “mouths” is preferable ([02:53], [05:29]).

5. Catherine’s Ideal 21st

• When asked what her perfect birthday would look like, Catherine says simply getting out to a bar and being able to proudly show her new ID ([03:14]), not necessarily getting drunk to excess ([03:14]-[03:30]).
• Burt and Jim joke about Atlanta destinations and classic coming-of-age rituals ([03:30]-[03:36]).

6. The Pressure and Emotional Impact

• Catherine feels her parents are projecting their own fears and experiences onto her, and that she’s being unjustly treated (“they’re coming from a place of fear” - Therese [04:25], “they’re just being so…” - Catherine [04:10]).
• A caller urges her to seize the opportunity, warning of possible future regret if she doesn’t have her 21st birthday celebration ([05:48]).

7. Moving Out as a Solution

• Catherine mentions she’s moving out in a few months due to a new job and a long commute ([06:49]), but it’s not soon enough for her milestone birthday ([06:41]).

8. Honest or Secretive?

• Several opinions surface:
  • Should Catherine be honest about her plans and risk her parents’ disapproval, or quietly go out with friends?
  • Callers share perspectives from their own experiences, including one with a rehab counselor parent advocating for honesty ([10:39]), and a mother of a 21-year-old suggesting respect is most important—even if it means waiting ([11:56]).
• Therese acknowledges it’s difficult with conservative parents and the burden of being first; sometimes a strategic little white lie is easier ([11:20]).

9. Celebrating on a Delay

• Some suggest Catherine could celebrate a few days after her birthday, once there’s less pressure or scrutiny, though others stress the magic of celebrating exactly at 21 ([12:28]).

10. The Power of Midnight

• Jen Hobby suggests going out at midnight as soon as it’s officially Catherine’s birthday ([08:13]), providing a workaround for a strict celebratory timeline.
• The hosts reminisce about the rites of passage, from showing ID at a club to parents sometimes joining the party ([09:12], [13:06]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Catherine (On parental rules):
  • “I think it's gonna be a little worse of a time if I'm not allowed to celebrate that.” ([00:09])
  • “I'm putting myself through college. So it kind of matters because they are throwing the guilt trip on the oldest of four children.” ([00:23])
• Therese (On religion and guilt):
  • “Is it a religious... What religion are you?” ([00:57])
  • “It's a guilt trip. Like you're going to be. They're going to talk to you.” ([06:19])
• Jim (On family rules):
  • “It really is sort of a classic example of if you're under our roof, then you gotta live by our rules type deal.” ([01:25])
• Burt Weiss (On parental hypocrisy):
  • “That's not the answer you wanted.” ([01:43])
  • “You talk as the guy whose voice is burned out from drinking and partying.” ([07:44])
• Catherine (On family history):
  • “Alcoholism does run in my family. My mom grew up with an alcoholic father...I can understand why they're coming from where they're coming from. But I take it very personally.” ([01:50])
• Caller, 23-year-old woman ([05:48]):
  • “I didn't really celebrate my 21st birthday the way I wanted to...If I could, I would totally take it back in a heartbeat...That's something you're just gonna regret one day because you only turn 21 once.”
• Caller, man with rehab counselor dad ([10:39]):
  • “My parents are really against drinking...I just told them, you know, I'm not going to bring alcohol into your house. I'm not going to be disrespectful of you. And I just think that it went over way better than if I would have lied to them.”
• Jen Hobby (On celebrating at midnight):
  • “That would sort of mark the day...the whole clock strike midnight thing. Go walk up to the bartender, walk up to the police officer and be like, look at my ID. I'm really 21.” ([08:53])
• Mindy, mother of five daughters ([13:45]):
  • “I have three adult daughters who did a lot of stuff that I never found out about until later. And you only have one chance to celebrate your 21st birthday, and I think you should just go out and do it. Your mom and your dad are going to love you no matter what.”

Key Timestamps

• 00:01-00:57 — Catherine explains her dilemma: parents won’t allow celebration
• 00:57-01:24 — Religion and alcohol: Southern Baptist background
• 01:50-02:15 — Family history of alcoholism and feelings of distrust
• 02:36-03:08 — Hosts brainstorm secretive celebration workarounds
• 03:14-03:36 — Catherine's ideal birthday and Atlanta references
• 04:25-05:03 — Parental guilt, pressure, and potential for parental plans to intervene
• 05:48-06:41 — Advice from a 23-year-old caller about birthday regrets and guilt trips
• 06:49-07:19 — Catherine will move out post-birthday; milestone timing
• 08:13-08:53 — Midnight celebration suggestions
• 10:39-11:18 — Caller who advocates honesty about going out
• 11:56-12:28 — Parent caller endorses respecting parents, even if it means postponing
• 13:45-13:47 — Parent of five daughters encourages Catherine to go out and celebrate

Conclusion

The hosts and callers provide a spectrum of advice—from honesty and compromise, to strategic subterfuge or simply waiting it out. The consensus: turning 21 is a unique milestone, and while respecting parents is important, so is creating memorable rites of passage. Though there’s no simple solution, Catherine is encouraged to weigh her personal values and family dynamic before deciding how to celebrate her birthday.