Vault: How Many Times Do The Bert Show Members Lie?

Summary

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The Bert Show – Vault: How Many Times Do The Bert Show Members Lie?

Overview

In this engaging and candid episode, members of The Bert Show tackle an experiment to track how often they lie—both the little “white lies” and the bigger, bolder fibs—over the span of 24 hours. With wit and self-deprecating humor, the team discusses different types of lies, debates what constitutes a lie, and predicts their own honesty (or lack thereof). The goal: bring awareness to the surprisingly frequent ways we bend the truth in everyday life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Experiment Setup: Tracking Lies

• Purpose: The team commits to logging every time they lie (big or small) over 24 hours.
• Four Types of Lies Identified:
  • White Lie: Socially trivial, “harmless” fibs.
  • Big Lie: Fully fabricated, no basis in truth.
  • Exaggeration: Based on truth but stretched.
  • Omission: Leaving out relevant details.
• Initial Debate:
  • The group hashes out what counts as a lie, especially “omission lies.”
  • Discussion on lying by omission versus a flat-out falsehood.

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Defining the Lies

• White Lie: “I said that would be my biggest defense.” – Melissa (02:22)
• Exaggeration vs. Big Lie:
  • Wendy (03:08): “Exaggeration would be, I graduated from Syracuse University because I went there, but I didn’t graduate. The big lie would be, I graduated from Harvard.”
• Omission Example:
  • Wendy (03:41): “Omission would be if somebody says, ‘Hey, where did you go to school?’ and I said, ‘Oh, I went to Gannon University and I took classes at Onondaga,’ but left out Syracuse.”

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Predicting the Number of Lies (05:07–06:20)

Each host tries to guess how many lies they’ll end up telling in the next 24 hours:

• Wendy: “Seven is my number.” (05:16)
  • Later revises to: “10. 10 for Wendy.” (05:35)
• Melissa: “I’m good at the omission one. I’m going with 12.” (05:42)
• Bob: “I’ll say nine.” (06:15)
• Jeff: “I think it’ll be 10 lies throughout the entire day.” (06:20)

Notable Dynamics

• Self-awareness and ribbing: Jeff teases Melissa about being an “omission” expert.
• Wendy jokes about being “pathetic” after the group brings up a real-world omission she recently made.

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What Counts as a Lie? Gray Areas (06:22–07:22)

• Ignoring Calls: Is letting a call go to voicemail when you could answer a lie?
  • Jeff (06:51): “If she says, ‘How come you didn’t pick up?’ … and I say, ‘I didn’t even realize that you called, even though I saw it’, that’s a bold face lie.”
  • Wendy (06:58): “What if you never have to address it? … Is that technically a lie?”
  • Melissa (07:16): “Because you’re like, I’m gonna pretend I’m not busy, so I’m going to push the button on the top.”
• Consensus: Ignoring with intent is lying by omission or avoidance.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “We all made an agreement … we were all gonna go 24 hours and write down the little lies we tell.”
  — Jeff (02:00)
• “White lie, blatant, big ass, bold ass, lie.”
  — Jeff, listing categories (02:38)
• “If your phone rings and you let it go to voicemail, but you’re available to talk, is that a lie?”
  — Wendy, sparking debate (06:40)
• “Melissa’s omission is going to be through the roof here.”
  — Jeff, poking fun (05:46)
• “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then just sit like a bump on a log.”
  — Bob, on avoiding lies by staying silent (05:57)

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Important Timestamps

• 02:00 — Experiment introduction: tracking and categorizing lies for 24 hours.
• 02:50–04:06 — The four types of lies: white, big, exaggeration, omission, with real-life examples.
• 05:07–06:20 — Hosts wager on how many lies they’ll commit.
• 06:22–07:22 — Lively debate on ignoring phone calls as a form of lying.

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Summary Tone & Takeaways

The Bert Show crew, with their typical playful and honest banter, uncover how lying permeates everyday life—even in seemingly innocent interactions. The show deals with self-scrutiny, humor, and a surprisingly deep examination of human behavior:

• Takeaway: We’re all probably lying more than we think—whether to spare feelings, out of laziness, or for convenience.
• Memorable Moment: The team’s willingness to hold each other accountable, even as they laugh about their foibles, underscores their authenticity—the very quality that makes the show relatable.

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For those who missed the episode: You’ll leave amused—and possibly more self-reflective about your own daily honesty!

Transcript

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[Host]

You're on the Burt Show.

[Jeff]

We all made an agreement with each other a couple of weeks ago that we were all gonna go 24 hours and write down the little lies that we tell.

[Bob]

Little?

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Bob]

Big and small, right?

[Jeff]

Big and small.

[Wendy]

Well, we have to. I don't know if the reason we did it is because we have to determine what constitutes a lie because we had an issue like omission. Is that a lie?

[Jeff]

Yeah.

[Host]

What was that?

[Melissa]

I said that would be my biggest defense.

[Bob]

I thought there was like four categories saying Anything?

[Wendy]

Yeah, there's the.

[Melissa]

On that list, wasn't there four categories?

[Jeff]

I'm looking for the list right now. Do you have it over there?

[Wendy]

I could probably find it. But there was the.

[Melissa]

It looks like a white lie.

[Wendy]

Yeah. And then there was the omission.

[Jeff]

White lie, blatant, big ass, bold ass, lie.

[Melissa]

That's the lie.

[Jeff]

Blatant. I know for sure that I'm telling you a lie. What was the fourth one?

[Wendy]

Hang on, I'll find them.

[Jeff]

I can't remember, but on average.

[Wendy]

All right, here are the types of lies. The white lie, the big lie, the exaggeration, and the omission.

[Melissa]

So what's the difference between the big and the exaggeration?

[Bob]

Exaggeration is just. It's based in truth, but you just exaggerate it. Where the big lie is just. You flat out lie, fabricate it.

[Wendy]

Like, I think a big lie would be like, for me, would be like, I graduated from Syracuse University because I went there, but I didn't graduate. So that's a pretty big lie. The exaggeration would be. No, that would be the exaggeration. The big lie would be, I graduated from Harvard.

[Bob]

Right.

[Wendy]

Because there's no basis of truth. I've never even been to Harvard except for walking past the campus once. You know what I mean?

[Jeff]

So the omission one is easy. I mean, you just don't claim at all that you went to Syracuse or any school at all. Somebody asks you, what school do you go to? I never went to college. I know that's a lie.

[Wendy]

No, it's a lie. An omission would be if somebody says, hey, where did you go to school? And I said, oh, I went to Gannon University in Pennsylvania, and I took some classes at Onondaga Community College and.

[Bob]

Just flush it out completely.

[Wendy]

Just didn't mention Syracuse for whatever reason. Maybe I'm embarrassed of it. Maybe. Whatever, blah, blah, blah. That'd be the admission. But those are the four categories.

[Bob]

So we're just going to, you know, take. Take account of how many times we do that throughout the day.

[Jeff]

Throughout the day. Okay, and what was the number? Do you have that stat there also? Because it was something. It was pretty stunning, like how many times you lie.

[Wendy]

Well, I think what you have to do, the way the experiment works is we would all have to predict today, or whatever day we're going to do this, how many lies of those four categories we would tell in the next 24 hours. And the surprising amount, or the surprising fact is that when you come in, it's Usually over double what you said it would be. So, like, I would say, let's say I'm gonna be awake probably 16 or 17 hours today, so 18 hours. So I would probably tell at the most nine lies, like, once every other hour. And that could be as simple as. Hey, are you walking by the kitchen? Like, maybe if I get up to go to the kitchen, I just don't feel like bringing Bird a bag of chips back. Say, no, no, no.

[Jeff]

All right, let's try to predict going into the 24 hours.

[Bob]

Wow.

[Jeff]

How many times do you guys think that you will lie or do the omission thing?

[Wendy]

I'm actually going to say less than nine. I'd like to say seven. Seven for seven is my number, Wendy. And keep in mind, Wendy ditched Hobby last night in the middle of a bar and left our band. And it's a mission right there.

[Jeff]

So you're gonna have to lie. You're gonna have to lie about what happened here sometime today.

[Wendy]

I'll go with you made me sound.

[Melissa]

So pathetic right there.

[Wendy]

10.

[Jeff]

10. 10 for Wendy.

[Melissa]

10.

[Wendy]

Okay.

[Melissa]

I'm good at the omission one. I'm going with 12.

[Jeff]

12. Melissa. Melissa's omission is going to be through the roof here. Melissa closes up. I mean, she's got shuts down.

[Bob]

If you don't have anything nice to say, then just sit like a bump on a log. You said seven, Jeff. And you said 12.

[Wendy]

$1. Bob.

[Melissa]

Yeah. Why are we predicting our numbers?

[Jeff]

Because we're counting to see how many we actually. And you got to write down all day long today what the lies were and bring them to the table tomorrow.

[Bob]

I'm going to go between them. I'll say nine.

[Jeff]

Nine. I'll go with 10.

[Bob]

Okay.

[Jeff]

I think it'll be 10 lies throughout the entire day.

[Wendy]

Is your family back in town?

[Jeff]

They are not. Oh, that's a lie. They are. There's one. No, they're not.

[Wendy]

Well, that. That's going to affect your number because you're not going to be around people to actually lie to them.

[Jeff]

So unless, like, Stacy calls and I don't feel like picking up and I say, oh, yeah, I was really getting bad reception or something like that.

[Wendy]

Is that a lie? I do that all the time. If your phone rings and you let it go to voicemail, but you're available to talk, is that a lie?

[Bob]

Yeah.

[Melissa]

Really?

[Will]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

Well, and. And use.

[Melissa]

Well, why did you strain phone calls?

[Jeff]

Well, if she says, how come you didn't pick up? What I called before? And I say, I didn't even realize that you called, even though I saw it. Go to voice.

[Bob]

The ringer was off.

[Jeff]

That's a bold face. Lie.

[Wendy]

But what if you never even have to address it with her? What if you're. What if you're in your car and you're doing nothing but singing along to the Sound of Music soundtrack like you often do, and you. And your phone rings.

[Bob]

It happens.

[Wendy]

You're available to take it, and I don't. But you hit ignore. That's technically a lie, right?

[Jeff]

I think that's a lie because you are available.

[Melissa]

Because you're like, I'm gonna pretend I'm not busy, so I'm going to push the button on the top.

[Jeff]

That's technically a lie.

[Wendy]

I'm going to have to reevaluate my number.

[Host]

You're on the Birch Show.